Dear Sirius Black,
Sorry for the lack of letters lately, I've been busy with work. I've also been exhausted lately because of the full moon but I've made it through exams after dealing with a full moon, I can handle some manual labor.
Happy Valentine's Day. I wonder if you know it's Valentine's Day, or if the days have started to blend together. I mean, I feel like they have to at some point. You're in solitary confinement for the rest of your life surrounded by creatures who only exist to make you as miserable as possible. I think I'd probably break in a month if I was being as strong as possible. Now that I think about it, I'm pretty sure that Azkaban is a war crime.
Anyway, I was thinking about you today, obviously. That doesn't say much, I've yet to go one day without thinking about you guys. Do you think it'd be creepy if I tried to find out where Lily's sister lives and visit Harry? Yeah, now that I'm writing it out that is really creepy. Well, one day he'll be an adult. I can tell him about how I knew his parents. I think that I'll leave out the part where I was planning to spend my life with the person who got them killed.
I really need to stop talking about that night in these letters, but how can I not? It's the reason I have to write them in the first place. I wish I was in a different world. One where all is well and we're spending our Valentine's Day at home together. You could wake me up to breakfast in bed, I could give you a murderous glare for disrupting my sleep, it'd be a great start to the day. Then we'd eat breakfast, you taking most of it even though you made it for me, and go about our regular morning routine. We could go to the Potters like the couple we are and hang out with them for a while, maybe even have lunch, and then then go home to spend the evening alone. We could cuddle on the couch and put on a movie. I miss that so much. Most nights I hold onto your pillow pretending that it's actually you. It doesn't smell like you anymore and it could never compare to the feeling of you in my arms, but at least I can let my imagination comfort me. I wish I could just hold you one last time. Maybe that reincarnation shit's real and one day we'll have our romantic happily ever after that I always thought we would have despite the fact we had to hide our relationship from most people.
Remember that time I came to watch your Quidditch practice and after everyone left you invited me into the locker room for some "alone time"? Yeah, really nice memory. Until you remember that James left something and walked in on me blowing you a few minutes later. Still, funny looking back even though we were both mortified in the moment. We would've gotten away with it if James wasn't the most forgetful bloke on the planet. Fucking Potter. I miss him.
Shit, this has gotten long. I'm going to go wank to some memories of you while pretending nothing happened and then I'm going to bed (at 8 I can't believe how early I have to get up) because I have work in the morning.
I love you,
Moon-pie 3
god i hated that nickname this holiday is really getting to me