Chapter 6

"Time to wake up!"

Mario jolted out of his bed, almost smacking his head against the wall. His head turned to the source of the noise, the princess all dressed up. Mario glanced out the window, scowling when he was greeted with a still dark sky. His eyes went back to Peach.

"Time?" Mario grumbled. Peach cocked her head.

"What time is it?" Peach parroted. Mario nodded. She beamed a grin.

"5:30!"

Mario's eyes widened. Sheesh, he hasn't been up this early since highschool. Most of the time he was the one getting Luigi out of bed, but even Mario was up at 6:30 the earliest. He let out a large yawn, and Peach walked up to him.

"It's time for your training," Peach explained. "The previous knight would wake up at 5, so technically you're kind of late."

Late? Ugh…

"Come on!"

Peach began trying to pry Mario out of bed. For a princess, she was quite strong. Mario gently pulled his arm away and spun around, putting his feet on the ground. Peach grabbed his hands and pulled him out of bed. Mario wobbled to a stand and hunched over, another yawn escaping his life. He would kill for a Brooklyn ground coffee right now.

"I have big plans for you, Mario," Peach began. She quickly ripped out a massive binder Mario hadn't even seen her come in with.

"I have some cardio exercises to test out your lungs," Peach explained. "And then some weight training to test your strength. Another lung related exercise related to how long you can hold your breath, and I have a couple more. One of them will be testing your ankle and foot strength, and testing how well you can jump."

"Jump?" Mario chuckled. I haven't jumped since sixth grade, he thought.

"Humans had jumping competitions in highschool!" Peach blurted, rummaging through her binder. A couple of smaller pages fell out and Mario bent down and shuffled them back into his hands. Mario sleepily sighed, handing her back her papers. She took them and smiled, shoveling them into any open area she could.

"Well, or so the books say."

"Paper," Mario noted, watching her flip through countless of pages. She glanced up at him.

"Paper?" she asked curiously. Mario nudged his chin to her binder and she smiled.

"Oh! My binder. I keep all the information from humans I've collected in here. Pages, not books. The books are back at the library. I have research documents from human beings and I have diaries from human beings, and!"

Mario watched as she hurriedly pulled out a colorful staple of paper.

"A magazine!" she announced. "Well, that's what Toadsworth calls it."

Mario took a peek at the magazine and was genuinely shocked to be met with a real People's Magazine. She must of kept it because it said people, he mused.

"Okay Mario," Peach continued. "Are you ready to get started?"

Mario shook his head and Peach gasped.

"No?"

Mario shook his head again, and patted his stomach. He thought about what Peach said to him the past couple of days, and it was like a light clicked in his brain.

"Breakfast!" Mario announced. Peach couldn't help but smile.

"Okay, okay, we can train after breakfast," she laughed.

—

After eating breakfast (and having to somehow explain to Peach in broken English that humans need at least 30 minutes before they can exercise after eating), Peach ushered Mario and Toadsworth outside. Peach could feel the competitiveness boiling in her stomach. Toadsworth was a good ol' complainer, and Peach was determined to make him eat his own boots. But she was also prepared for Mario, and she was excited to conduct experiments on an actual human being, rather than the medical dolls Toadsworth somehow got his hands on years prior.

The first trial was typical for Mario, it was like he was getting a physical. She was about to smack his knee with a massive hammer, but Mario's terrified expression must of alerted Toadsworth, because he quickly interrupted that and fixed the issue.

"I thought any sort of hammer would work!" she explained.

The second trial was like he was transported back to highschool. Peach played some kind of tape she found rummaging around in the closet, and much to Mario's dismay it just so happened to be the fitness gram pacer test. A miserable ten minutes later, Peach jotted some notes.

"I heard all humans struggle with pushups!" she laughed.

The third trial was almost it for him. Cardio was absolutely not Mario's strong suit, and with a weaker stomach than he was willing to let on, he could barely keep up with the demands. Run fast! Run slow! Run like a goomba was coming to attack you! Now run like a thwomp grew legs and was determined to squash you! Now run like the sun was going to burn you! With a horrible sick induced forty minute break, Mario climbed back into the ring.

"I didn't know humans could vomit from running!" she cried.

The break was well needed, as the next event was something Mario could actually do. She gave him different kinds of items, asking him to lift them up. It started from a plush ball to some kind of massive black ball. Weights maybe, but sadly the session was cut short after the giant black ball he was asked to hold came to life and decided he wanted some Italian food that night. Toadsworth and her hung onto the chain for dear life.

"I thought it was Chain Chomp hibernation season!" she shrieked.

And finally, the last trial. Jumping. Mario may have been covered in dirt, spit, and a lot of slobber from a sentient piece of metal, but this one was easy! Everyone knows how to jump, right? Peach said jump, Mario jumped. And yet, Peach and Toadsworth both looked disappointed.

"That was a jump?" Toadsworth denounced. "That was pathetic."

Mario could feel the anger trickling in his blood, but he bit his lip. At least this isn't Spike, he kept repeating to himself.

"Toadsworth," Peach hissed. "Be quiet. He's human."

"Humans are weak princess, I don't know what you see in him."

"I don't know," Peach shuffled through her notes. "He's quite strong, Toadsworth. Minus the last couple things, that's really good."

"Strength is not enough. Did you test his wits?" Toadsworth demanded. "He can't possibly make a quick time decision. He isn't even a diplomat! He can't speak our language! I genuinely have no idea what you're trying to do."

"Its day one," Peach argued. "He's honestly excelling for day one!"

"Peach, this is ridiculous," Toadsworth sternly declared. "I will continue looking for a proper knight for you."

Toadsworth spun around, and Peach turned to face him. A sudden thump on the ground made her turn back to Mario's direction. Mario had fallen to his knees, his hands glued to his eyes, trying to hold back any kind of tears that were escaping him. Peach quickly dropped Toadsworth's bitterness to sprint up to him, kneeling on the ground next to him.

"Oh, Mario, please don't cry," she pleaded, reaching her arms around him. "He's just a bitter old man. You're doing great!"

Mario didn't really know why he was crying. The failure in athletics reminded him of home. Of being under another man's plumbing business. Another man who didn't value either of them. How he would have to comfort Luigi's sobs on the way home, but he didn't have enough confidence, enough English, or enough strength to deal with the constant bullying. Getting yelled at because they accidentally twisted a wrench left instead of right, getting yelled at because Luigi, who tried to call out sick prior, threw up in a client's garbage can, which startled the client and lost them their tip. Mario thought about how useless he was to protect his brother from their fucked up boss, because Mario was afraid of change, and Mario couldn't think of a life outside of plumbing, and how his job was to take care of Luigi and he failed him then and he failed him now, because Luigi was nowhere to be seen and could be dead for all he knew, and it was all his fault, because he couldn't hold onto his brother with a tight enough grip. And it always, always feels like he isn't strong enough to hold on to his brother and keep him safe. And when things finally made sense, and Luigi pursued his real purpose in life, and Mario finally branched away from the abuse and made his own agency it wasn't enough. He could barely pay for the house, let alone Luigi's college education. And now he's getting yelled at by some sentient mushroom because of the way he jumps? His brother could be dead, but all this mushroom cares is how he jumps? Despite choking on his own mind, he would be the first to admit the embrace was helping him calm down. The awkward breathing turned more tolerable, and his hands slowly left his eyes down to his chest to monitor his breathing. He was used to ignoring his own wellbeing, he wasn't mad about that either. He often put his brother before him, because that's what made him happy. But his brother is gone, and the situation is finally catching up to him. Mario was in an unknown world, with unknown people, and he had nobody to truly turn to. The princess was nice, but everyone else despised him. He agreed to fight some war he doesn't even know the first thing of. Worst of all, he can't communicate with anybody. He knows what he wanted to say a million times earlier– Stop! I can't take it anymore! My body burns and I feel like I'm going to die! But he had no clue how to shout that in English. Luigi would though. Luigi knows a lot. Mario felt Peach's hand glide from a hug into rubbing his back. He finally got enough courage to look in her eyes, and she stared back, her eyes softer than usual.

"I'm sorry, Mario," she sighed. "I overworked you, didn't I?"

Mario didn't respond. He didn't really know what to say. On one hand, she did kind of overwork him. On the other, he wasn't mad at her for it. He was mad at himself. Peach sighed.

"Let's get you up," Peach softly noted, helping him to his feet.

"How about we go inside?"

—

The princess was quick to bring Mario towards his room. Mario kept his head down the best he could. He wasn't too interested with trying to explain himself, nor was he interested with becoming face to face with Toadsworth again. Not right now, at least. She led him to his door, and handed him a new pair of clothes.

"You can change into these," she noted. Mario rummaged through the clothes and pulled out a split down the middle black and white mask. He looked at her curiously.

"The top of the royal Mushroom Kingdom guards wore those," she sighed. "And I think you should try it on. I think it'd look good on you."

Peach closed the door and waited for him to change. Mario examined the mask more, holding it up to the light. It had a lovely, glassy coat on it which made it shine in the light. There was a beautifully carved M right where his usual hat would be. He set it down by his bed, and proceeded to get changed. He approached the mirror and grumbled at his disgusting look, hurriedly wiping his face with a small section of clean sleeve from his previous red turtleneck. And with that, he gently placed the mask over his face. It was a bit awkward to adjust, but after a couple minutes of messing around with it, something just clicked. He could see through it easily, and it didn't feel like it was crushing his nose. Everything seemed right. In some way, it calmed him. He adjusted his tool belt and made his way to the door, opening it. Peach smiled at him and beckoned him onwards.

"That mask looks amazing on you," she noted. Mario nodded.

"I hope you like it," she continued. "I even had one of the Toads carve an M in it, I thought it would make you feel closer to home."

She continued to walk deeper into the castle, until she opened a relatively large set of doors. Mario awkwardly darted across the room, shocked at what he was greeted with. He looked at Peach curiously.

"I brought you to my room," Peach explained. "So that we can have some alone time."

Mario nodded, and Peach gently walked him to her bed. Mario almost tripped on the easily hidden white stairs leading up to her mattress. The bed was way too big for the princess alone, but Mario was sure that was related to being royalty. He takes a seat on the bed and Peach swiftly sat next to him,

"I'm sorry, Mario," she sighed. "I didn't mean to overexert you."

Mario nodded, and Peach continued.

"I was just so excited to meet a real human," she explained. "I heard they were nothing more than extinct. I let my excitement get the better of me, and it hurt you. I didn't mean that."

Mario nodded again. She put her chin in the palm of her hands, her elbows resting on her knees.

"Toadsworth is all grumpy about humans. He won't teach me about them. He won't even say squat. And what's worse of all, is Toadsworth knew humans who walked in the Mushroom Kingdom. Guy's old."

They both shared a laugh. Peach sighed again.

"I know I'm not half human or whatever," Peach began. "I don't know if I told you I was half human or I had a human parent. I don't. I know I don't. Toadsworth told me I came from a peach, and that's where he got my name. I thought that was a load of bologna. Turns out he was right, and he still has the peach leaves to prove it. Thought that would of all rotted away at this point."

Mario cocked his head curiously, and somehow Peach knew what he meant.

"They call me a parasitic princess," Peach grumbled. "Most do it because they think I'm a terrible leader. Others do it because they think I'm some kind of mutated human/toad/parasitic DNA that hatched from a peach."

Mario was definitely confused, but he let her continue talking. It seemed cathartic for her.

"Toadsworth is notorious for making up some fun lies for me. But I think the part where he says I killed the peach, I think that part is real. And I feel bad. I know its just some stupid peach, but I killed some massive peach! I'm sure some farmer is annoyed about that."

Her eyes settled on Mario, who gently placed a hand on her shoulder. She sadly smiled.

"Either way," she continued. "I feel bad. Because I wonder if I was even supposed to exist. It was just me and Toadsworth. I don't remember much outside of that. Except a guy. A couple guys, but one specifically. A blonde haired guy. He had some long white coat and a staff. My vision of him is a little hazy, but I thought he was my dad. And he was totally human. I don't know where I got that from."

Peach rolled her eyes.

"I think maybe Bowser knew this person too. Bowser despises humans."

Mario put his finger up, and Peach looked back at him.

"That's right, I don't think I told you much about Bowser."

Mario nodded. Peach shrugged.

"He's Bowser, alright," she chuckled. "He goes to other people's kingdoms, mostly mine, and kidnaps their rulers, mostly me. And for some chunk of land or something."

Mario continued to stare her in the eyes.

"I… don't know much about this land, admittedly. I know its important to Toadsworth. He keeps talking about death tolls and how we all fought for it and how Bowser is a war criminal and would destroy his friendships. I've considered just giving it to him! The land isn't important to me. But, I don't know why I don't. I guess I hate Bowser too. Besides, he kidnaps me a lot. Which is why I know Toadsworth was worried about you doing something weird."

Mario thought back to when he first met Toadsworth. What a scary time.

"I'm sorry you're dragged into this," Peach sighed. "You're not my knight in shining armor. And that's okay. I'm sorry I hurt you."

Mario shook his head and pounded his fist to his chest. Peach couldn't quite understand what he meant, but a confident grin gave her the impression it was good.

"You're fun," Peach laughed. She glanced to the balcony.

"Hey, want to see the Mushroom Kingdom at night?"

Mario's eyes trailed to the balcony door, and he nodded. Oh how nice it would be to see a night sky. Though it seemed night came here a bit faster than it did in Brooklyn. She took his hand and walked him towards the door. She opened the door, and the night sky hit Mario in the face like a truck. His eyes were enamored by the massive amount of lights. It wasn't blinding like Brooklyn, and it wasn't loud like Brooklyn. The lights, though abundant, were soft. And the night sky was completely visible. Can't get a view this good in Brooklyn.

"Its lovely, isn't it?" Peach mused. "I spend a lot of my nights looking out this balcony."

The two of them continued to watch the sky. Peach put one hand on Mario's shoulder and then pointed forward.

"I think I see a meteor," she mumbled.

Mario quickly followed her finger, his eyes meeting the same dim, moving light she saw. They both watched on, massive grins covering their face. A real meteor? Mario can't say he ever saw one before. Peach's voice interrupted his thoughts.

"Is it getting closer?"

"Hm?"

Mario squinted his eyes, trying to get a better view. She was right, the light was getting closer, along with getting brighter. Mario could still barely see what Peach saw, but suddenly, she was swept with a wave of panic.

"Oh no."

"No?" Mario asked, glancing up at her.

"Mario, we need to go get Toadsworth."

Mario looked at her, and then looked back at the light. Finally, things started to make sense. A giant sort of battleship was flying through the sky, and the light radiating throughout the sky was nothing more than fire. Mario still had a hard time seeing the ship too well, but he could see the dark brown piercing through the night sky.

"Toadsworth!" Peach shrieked, swinging around to her bedroom. Mario turned to look at the door and then quickly spun back around when a large thud landed next to him on the balcony. Mario met the eyes of the noise, a massive turtle like creature. Next to him dangled a ladder, and the ship was extremely close to the castle. How fast was that ship? Or how slowly does Mario blink?

"Princess!" the beast roared. "Its been awhile."

She glared at him.

"Leave me alone, Bowser!" she hissed. Mario's eyes widened. Bowser? That's Bowser? Mario couldn't take his sight off him. He was almost three times his size! The smoke billowing out of his nose made Mario uncomfortable. Could that beast breathe fire? Bowser chuckled loudly, and he watched a could of hot embers bounce off his mouth.

"What's the matter princess?"

"You know the issue. Why do you keep bothering me?"

"You know why," Bowser snarled, taking a step forward. Mario couldn't comprehend what was going on, but somehow his legs took hold, and he sprinted in front of Peach, putting his arms out. Bowser cocked a brow and snarled.

"This your new bodyguard?" Bowser asked. Peach looked down at Mario, but Mario kept his eyes locked on Bowser. Mario lowered his eyes, and Bowser arched his back up, putting his hands on his hips.

"Well he's certainly full of spunk," Bowser sniggered. "But he's sort of lacking in the height department isn't he?"

"You should know better than most that height doesn't determine someone's strength," Peach sneered. Bowser snarled.

"Well, at least he's taller than your previous knight."

Bowser took another step forward, and Mario refused to move. Bowser smirked.

"He's a weird one, isn't he? What's the M stand for on his head, huh? Meddler? Mushroom Muncher?"

"It stands for Mario, actually," Peach confidently announced. "And you'd do best to remember the name!"

"Oh, would I now?" Bowser howled, smacking his knee dramatically. "I guess, maybe so. It'd be rude to not have a name etched on someone's grave."

Mario couldn't say he really knew what he was doing. His brain kept repeating the same mantra over and over again, protect the princess, protect the princess. Something about the mask made him feel different, like he was somehow more powerful. Despite lacking any weapons, Mario refused to move, his shaded eyes meeting Bowser's fire red eyes.

"I suggest you move out of my way, Mario," Bowser snarled. Mario continued his locked on gaze.

"Your knight isn't too keen on following directions, is he?"

"Not to monsters, he's not."

"I want to know, princess," Bowser mulled. "What kind of species is he? Surely he isn't a mushroom freak like you. Unless he also crawled out of a peach? A plum perhaps? His reddish armor suggests a bit of an apple radiating off him…"

"Actually Bowser, he's–"

A sudden voice from the ship caught everyone's attention.

"Mario!"

Mario broke out his paused stance and glanced towards the ship. He could recognize that voice anywhere.

"Luigi?" Mario blurted out. Peach and Bowser eyes both widened.

"Luigi!?"