I don't own RWBY. It's been a hard day's night, and I've been working like a dog!

Immortal

Chapter 8: Fuck You Ozpin

The walk back to Ozpin's office was an odd one for Jaune. Luckily for him, on the Bullhead ride back to the school, Glynda had woken up, so he didn't have to worry about dragging her over his shoulder the entire time back. Blake however, who was still too weak in the knees for some unknown reason and couldn't walk, and as such required Jaune's help in order to make it to the school. This wouldn't have been a problem if it hadn't been for the fact that Blake was acting... oddly affectionate. Between her loud purring and the fact that she kept nuzzling Jaune's face with a dumb smile, Jaune was starting to feel a little uncomfortable. Not to mention he swore he could occasionally feel her humping his arm, but it might have just been the way he was moving. He hoped, anyway.

Once they actually made it back to the school, Jaune put Blake down (earning a very sad pout and a strange movement of her bow) and followed Ozpin up to his office. Once inside the large, spacious room, Ozpin made a movement to Jaune to sit down in the chair in front of his desk, which he complied with, watching as Ozpin poured himself another cup of coffee from his thermos.

After a few moments of silence, Ozpin finally spoke. "Immortal. Never before in my life have I ever encountered a Hunter with your particular Semblance. Tell me, do your parents know about this?"

Jaune's eye began to twitch and he gave a loud, high-pitched, and incredibly strained laugh. "D-d-do they know? Ohohoho, you're damned right they do!"

Ozpin raised a single eyebrow as he took a sip from his mug. "I see. Your... skill was impressive as well. I've never known a Hunter to kill a Nevermore with its own feather... nor kill a Deathstalker by, well... stinging it with its own stinger. Though, did you have to do it through the creature's... rear?"

"Hey, when you've been both decapitated and impaled by a Deathstalker in a single day, then you can kill said Deathstalker anyway you want." Jaune hmphed and crossed his arms, tapping his foot. "So, besides restating the obvious, what exactly did you want to call me up here for?"

"Well, I was hoping that I could convince you to possibly act as a Student-Teacher aide, helping other students with some of your experience, which I'm sure you have much of." Ozpin took a sip of his coffee once more, but paused when Jaune started laughing again, this time much calmer than before.

"Sorry, won't be happening."

"And why not?" Ozpin cocked an eyebrow.

"Because I quit."

Ozpin blinked, eyes widening. "Sorry?"

"I quit. I'm done. I'm no longer a Beacon student. I won't be going to classes and I won't be going for my hunting license. Did it ever occur to anyone that just because I'm immortal and just because I've been forced to get good at killing Grimm that maybe I don't want to become a Hunter? I have other dreams, you know."

Ozpin gripped his coffee mug tighter, his lips narrowing into a thin line. This wasn't good. He was about to lose his entertainment for the next four years! Not to mention the fact that the Arc scion was perfect for his shipping hobby! He'd already been setting up a list of women to set him up with! He would not fail the task that Violetta had so kindly asked of him!

Mainly because that woman could be a million times more terrifying than Goodwitch when she was angry.

"Mr. Arc..." Ozpin began, his mind desperately trying to pull up anything he could in order to keep Jaune in Beacon, "Shouldn't you give this a little more thou-"

"Nope! Already thought about it! Just pull up the paperwork!" Jaune's smile was too cheerful for the Headmaster's liking.

Ozpin groaned and pinched the bridge of his nose. "Great," He murmured as he removed his glasses and rubbed his face, replacing them afterward. "When she hears of this, Viole-" Ozpin's complaints were suddenly cut off when Jaune blurred next to him and clamped a hand down over his mouth.

"Shhhhh!" Jaune shushed him, eyes flickering all over the room, his boyish face going pale. "Do not say her name! She can hear you!" His eyes continued to glance about the room, cringing at the shadows.

Ozpin waited until Jaune had gotten his strange behavior out of his system and let him go before speaking up again, grinning. So Jaune was terrified of his own mother, was he? Smart lad, but that gave Ozpin exactly what he needed to keep the Arc boy around. "Mr Arc, you must understand, due to Beacon policies, if you do decide to drop out, we must contact your parents."

Jaune gave a very nervous laugh. "W-w-w-why would y-you have to d-do that? I mean... c'mon! There's no reason t-to get my parents i-involved!" Jaune rubbed his arm with one hand, his smile looking more like a grimace than an expression of joy. "I-I mean, I am seventeen years old, I think I can make my own decisions, you know?"

"I'm sorry, Jaune," Ozpin began, unable to keep the grin from his face as he straightened some papers on his desk, "But these regulations are here for the students safety, regardless of whether or not they can come back from the dead."

"That... that doesn't make any sense!" Jaune shouted, slamming his hands down on the table.

"I can't show favoritism towards students, Mr. Arc. Surely you can understand?" Ozpin reached for his Scroll, moving slightly slower than usual in order to give Jaune the time to back down. He and Jaune locked eyes, as if daring the other to back down. Ozpin's hand inched closer and closer to his scroll, the tension in the room building and climbing as the distance between his fingers and the scroll lessened…

"... nnnyyyaaaaaggghhhh!" Jaune gave a strangled cry and grabbed his hair. "Okay, fine! You win!" The young blond man slumped forward and groaned. "I'll... stay..."

Ozpin struggled to keep the triumphant smile from his face, trying to remain impassive. "I'm very glad you decided to renege on your decision. Now, about the Student-Teacher aide position?"

The office was silent for a few moments, as neither student, nor Headmaster, spoke a word.

Finally, after what felt like an hour of silence to Ozpin, Jaune spoke up. "Fuck you, Ozpin."

Sip.

"Rude."

Jaune sighed and rubbed the bridge of his nose. "You know what? Fine. I'll just make you kick me out!"

"Oh?" Ozpin cocked an eyebrow.

"Hell yeah. Beacon's got all sorts of rules I can break!" Jaune's face broke out into an almost psychotic grin. "By the time I'm finished, the entire staff will be begging for you to kick me out!" He leaned forward, his bangs shadowing his eyes as he continued speaking, "I'm not going to let anyone control my life anymore. I've dealt with that for seventeen Dust forsaken years and I'll be damned if I deal with it for another year longer. So, what do you say to that, Ozpin?"

Ozpin remained silent for a few moments, sipping on his coffee and messing with the papers that littered his desk. Jaune continued to stare, frowning as he waited for Ozpin's response, but, as the moments turned to minutes, the tension in the room started to build once more. Jaune's expression tightened into a thin-lipped grimace.

I never thought I'd ever say this in regards to you, but TALK ALREADY! Jaune twitched, trying to fight the urge to pick up the massive desk and throw it right at Ozpin's head.

After what seemed like an eternity, with Jaune's patience wearing dangerously thin, the Headmaster spoke. "Is that a challenge, Mr. Arc?"

Jaune growled. "You're damn right that's a challenge!"

For the first time since he arrived at Beacon, Jaune felt a feeling he hadn't from anyone save his mother. Fear. Ozpin matched Jaune's earlier psychotic grin and he took another sip of his mug. "Mr. Arc... challenge accepted."

Jaune blinked, taken aback by Ozpin's sudden change into a terrifying countenance. "W-what?"

"You'd be surprised at what this school will let me get away with. Everyone here trusts my judgment, and if I say you should stay, they'll agree with me." Ozpin took a satisfied sip of his coffee, leaning back in his seat.

"Oh yeah? I'm the next in line for the head of the Arc Clan. I've created my own Arc Family Blade Technique. What makes you think I can't get kicked out of a school?" Jaune snapped back, eyes narrowing.

Ozpin laughed heartily. "Oh, I think these next four years will be the most entertaining I've ever had."

Jaune stood up from his seat, now glaring daggers at Ozpin. Turning on his heel, the blond man stormed off, walking back into the elevator down the tower. With a growl, he pushed the button on the elevator for the bottom floor, and as the doors began to slowly close, Jaune sent one last glare towards the Headmaster.

"Fuck you, Ozpin!"

Ozpin watched as the doors closed on Jaune's features and took one last sip of his coffee mug, frowning. "Rude."

[Beacon Academy – Auditorium]

"... Ruby Rose, Weiss Schnee, Blake Belladona, and Yang Xiao Long. You will compose team RWBY, as led by Ruby Rose!"

Ruby gave a cheer and pumped her fist in the air. "Woo!"

Yang grinned and ruffled her younger sister's hair affectionately. "Great job Ruby!"

Standing behind the newest team, team JNPR waited. Jaune flashed Ruby a grin, his foul mood momentarily forgotten. Pyrrha placed a hand on his shoulder, catching his attention and he looked back to his red haired partner who flashed him a smile.

"I cannot wait to hear about our Team, although I fear we might overshadow anyone we're partnered with. Perhaps you and I shall be in a Team in and of itself?"

Jaune groaned and his back slumped. "No, Pyrrha. We're getting put on a four person team just like everyone else. Regardless of who or... what, we are, we're still being treated as normal students."

Pyrrha nodded sagely. "Oh, of course. You're absolutely correct. In the world of mortals, we must act as mortals."

"... you... you're actually serious about this whole 'divinity' thing, aren't you?"

Before Pyrrha could speak up, team RWBY had made their way off of the stage and Ozpin spoke up again. "The next team. Jaune Arc, Pyrrha Nikos, Lie Ren, and Nora Valkyrie." The four named students walked up to the stage, overlooking the audience before them. Pyrrha flashed her usual award winning smile, Nora was bouncing up and down, Ren was relatively calm, and Jaune looked like he'd rather be anywhere else, alternating between staring incredulously at Pyrrha, and glaring daggers at Ozpin once more. If the Headmaster noticed the blond man affixing him with a death glare, he didn't make it known, instead speaking up once more. "You will be... Team JNPR!"

Pyrrha smiled, waving to the audience with one hand and holding Jaune's shoulder almost possessively with the other. Nora let out a yelled "WOOHOO!" before squeezing Ren in a hug that Jaune swore had the boy's back cracking painfully and sympathetically winced.

"... as led by... Jaune Arc!" Ozpin finished, briefly turning to Jaune with an almost evil smile.

Jaune stared back, even as his partner embraced him, smiling like crazy. "Jaune, that's wonderful! I know you'll be an excellent and perfect leader!" Pyrrha's voice was proud and joyful.

"Jaune-Jaune's a leader! What does a leader do? Can I be a leader too? What are you leading? Are you leading us? Where are you leading us to? I'd like to go to the zoo. The zoo has sloths! I like sloths. Sloths are fuzzy and furry and I wanna hug them. Ren is nice to hug." Nora's rambling began once again and Jaune groaned, over looking the crowd of students in front him before throwing up his hands and affixing Ozpin with the dryest possible stare he could muster and spoke, loud enough for the entire auditorium to hear.

"Fuck! You! Ozpin!"

The entire room went quiet, the eyes of the assembled students widening in shock. Another student, a first year student, just swore at Ozpin so disrespectfully! Everyone sat stock still, waiting for Ozpin to chew out the young man, or perhaps even kick him out of the school for such a thing!

Sip.

"Rude."

Jaws dropped and eyes widened even further. That was it? No punishment? No lecture about treating his elders with respect? Not even a slap on the wrist, either physical or metaphorical? What was going on? Who was this blond kid? Did he know Ozpin personally?

Murmurs began to rise from the audience as they continued to stare at Jaune and Ozpin, the former glaring wrathfully at the Headmaster and the latter smirking back.

Ren stared at the two, then at his partner, and then at Pyrrha. He sighed. So much for getting some reading in…

[Beacon – Team JNPR Dorms]

The door to the dorm room was kicked in, almost flying off its hinges, and Nora jumped in excitedly, bright eyes flickering about the room. "Alright guys, let's get this thing decorated! We should decorate it with pink! Lots of pink! I like pink! Ren dyes part of his hair pink! You should dye your hair Jaune. Hey, dye sounds a lot like die! Does it hurt when you die?"

Jaune groaned and sighed as he slowly walked in behind his orange haired teammate. "Yes. Yes it does hurt. A lot. It's one of the many reasons I hate it."

"You don't sound happy about your... er... promotion." Ren spoke up.

"I'd been hoping to scoot by under the radar, not thrown into the spotlight. The last thing I need is for everyone in Beacon to find out about my immortality and my skill..."

"Just how skilled are you?" Ren asked curiously.

"Enough." Jaune quipped. The young blond man looked around the empty room and scratched his head. "So... we're supposed to decorate our own rooms, huh? Sadly, I didn't bring much in the way of interior decorating, although if you gave me some paint swatches and a budget of say... 5000 Lien, I might be able to make this place look fairly ritzy."

Pyrrha blinked in confusion. "Interior decorating? What... what else can you do?"

Jaune gave a tired grin. "We don't have enough time for me to list them all before the end of the day. Combat is just a side skill of mine."

"Where are we going to get 5000 Lien?" Ren asked, more to himself than to anyone else.

"I brought stuff!" Nora shouted, jumping into the air again. "I have lots of posters and pink curtains and lots of stuff to make the room extra PRETTY! I like pink, pink is my favorite color! Ren's hair is kind of pink! He dyes it every so often! I'm hungry. When's dinner? Could you make me pancakes Ren? Ren's pancakes are the best. I like pancakes with syrup!"

"Actually, Nora brings up a good point." Jaune admitted. With lack of care, Jaune tossed his bags onto a bed in the corner. "Although we should at least move some of the furniture around here to our choosing."

Nora quickly rushed forward and pushed one of the beds close to the other and pumped her fist. "Alright, this bed will be mine and this one will be Renny's!"

Jaune frowned for a moment, stroking his chin before moving forward himself and moving the other two beds in the room close to each other, mirroring Nora's actions. "There. We can't have asymmetry in the room. Pyrrha, what do you think?"

Pyrrha's face went red as she noticed how her bed was so close to Jaune. "I love it! It's absolutely perfect!"

Jaune grinned and gave Pyrrha a thumbs up. "Awesome. I really think the way the beds look really ties the room together."

Ren blinked. "Er... Jaune?"

"Yeah?"

"You... do... realize what you're hinting with the bed placements, right?"

Jaune cocked an eyebrow. "What? It's a nice mirror! Can't have the two beds apart like that if the other pair is connected, it would make the room look horrible!"

"Not that I'm arguing with your choice in interior design and burgeoning knowledge in Feng Shui, I don't think that-" Ren began. He froze solid however, the words dying on his lips when he caught Pyrrha affixing him with a withering glare, as if daring him to separate them. "You know what? On second thought, you should keep it like that. We can work with this."

Pyrrha's face adopted her usual smile and tilted her head. "I'm glad you think that way Ren. Now, Jaune, I will admit that I tend to move around quite a bit at night, so don't be surprised if I accidentally end up in your bed..." Pyrrha's smile turned almost predatory in nature, but Jaune had his back to her, still looking over the room.

"I say we split this place up into fourths. We can decorate it in our own choice. It might seem chaotic, but I like to think that if we can keep a very distinct line between the different areas of the room, it'll be a very interesting controlled chaos." Jaune nodded. "Yeah, that seems like the best idea. Heck, we can make it a team outing and head to Vale for some decorations!"

"Sounds like fun! Woo hoo! We should totally do a team outing! I like outings! Can we stop by the zoo! I should get a baby sloth for our room! I-" Nora started

"Gonna cut you off right there. No live animals in the room. Ever." Jaune crossed his arms, frowning at Nora. "Consider that my first decree as a leader."

Nora slumped forward with an "Awwww..."

Jaune suddenly turned to the door of the dorm and stroked his chin. "Hey, if we're gonna go to town, let's go invite team RWBY!"

"Good idea!" Pyrrha replied, clasping her hands. "Sounds like fun! I'm sure Ruby will be delighted to join us."

Jaune grinned. "I'll head over right now and let them know!" The young blond man threw open the door to their dorm and walked across the hall, to the room where team RWBY had been assigned. He approached their door, and rose a fist to knock on the door, but stopped when he heard noises. The door had been left open a crack, and Jaune very slowly peeked into the room out of curiosity. What he saw had his jaw on the floor and he froze in shock.

There was a small television in the far end of the room, and playing on the screen was a cartoon show, one that Jaune recognized. "Sailor Lunar." A magical girl anime. But this... this was not the most shocking thing he saw.

No. The most shocking thing was the lone person in the middle of the room. Yang. Wearing a very small schoolgirl outfit, twirling around in a circle before stopping with her hips cocked and her fingers held in a sideways V over her eye, her voice shouting out "Transform! Here to save the world, Magical Girl Yang-Chan!"

Jaune blinked and slowly turned away, his face turning pale. Pretend you saw nothing... pretend you saw nothing… just begin repressing the memories...

Author's Note: Sorry about the lack of updates, but life has gotten right in my way. With the risk of the loss of my job in the horizon, it's been hard to come up with the time and motivation to write. But, you folks are amazing, and with so many people following me, I cannot let you go without your dose of utter and complete insanity! Look forward to the Phantom Nevermore: Moonlit Sonata Chapter 2 soon!

And yep. Yang's big thing is she's a Magical Girl fan.

(This chapter was beta read by Maxaro! Read his work! Nao!)

And keep the reviews flowing!