Two Xenas. You'd think that would be every bard's fantasy. But it wasn't. It was fun, in a way, to see a softer side to Xena. By that, I mean a royal princess. But their likeness was only skin deep.
Don't get me wrong, my warrior princess has a soft side to her. One that very few people are privileged to witness. And Diana was a warrior in her own right. She had just been sheltered. Not unlike how I had been sheltered.
The fact there are three others, at least used to be, that appeared identical to my warrior princess, could have been thought of as fun. But the fact of the matter was, especially at this time in my life, was painful.
I loved Xena, of that there was no doubt. We'd had some misses in telling one another of our feelings. The latest adventure had instilled in me that I remained naïve. To the ways of the world and to the ways of the heart.
It meant I needed to be more careful with my emotions. I couldn't allow myself to fall for anyone. Even show that I loved Xena with every breath that I took. Seeing two Xenas was…unnerving at best.
Xena winks at me as she makes her way into her room. I can't call it her weapons room, though there are a fair share of those. It's where my warrior keeps all her pastimes. There are too many to list. After all, she has many skills.
I think Xena realized, as she always does, that I needed a little something as I stroll down memory lane. It's not always the individual adventures that are so difficult to handle. It's the way they tie together.
Meeting Diana was interesting in many ways. It wasn't the fact she resembled Xena so. It was the fact I was her teacher. I had to be the one to show her how the little people lived, as she liked to refer to them.
I think we both needed the lightness of the adventure. And we had our time alone. It was Xena who went to the castle, while I remained at our campsite. It gave me time to think. And to attempt to write.
This is one adventure I'd love to know what Xena was thinking. What was it like seeing a possibility of a different personality? It had to haunt her. The what ifs. They haunted me. And Diana was a reminder of how different things could have been.
Granted Xena wouldn't have been raised in a palace, but if only her father hadn't tried to kill her. Or if her brother hadn't perished as they defended their home. And the biggest of all. If Caesar had not used and abused her so.
I shudder at the number of lives that would be different. Callisto wouldn't have killed so many innocents in the name of revenge. Alti wouldn't have sought out Xena. Would Lyceus had lived?
And the greatest what if for me would be what would have happened to me. Would I have settled for marrying Perdicus like I did and regretted? Or would I have braved the world and attempted to become the bard I am today?
Once again, I find myself off topic. So many things happened to us on our journeys. It wasn't merely the new people we met. Or the injuries we suffered. And the numerous times we each died.
It was how we fell in love. It was how we denied our love. It was how we used others to make the other jealous. It was a journey like no other in history. Will any of our next reincarnations even come close? Only time will tell. For now, I sit back and reflect on meeting a princess.
WARRIOR…PRINCESS
It wasn't the usual encampment. Xena was visiting the area's king. Gabrielle had wanted to attend the initial meeting, but the king had ordered the warrior princess to arrive alone. While both hated it, both also needed it as well.
Things had been awkward between them. And yet, everything had remained the same. It was something Gabrielle wanted to change. And yet, knew there was nothing she could do anything about.
So what was a bard to do? Write. In this case, it was poetry. It was an attempt to express what Xena must attempt to deal with every second of every day. Gabrielle couldn't understand how her warrior was able to function.
From the life of Marcus, to the life of Talus, so much loss that could have been prevented. Gabrielle knew of the past. Of a brother that had been one of the steps to the road of darkness. It hadn't been directly at Xena's hand, but the warrior princess continued to blame herself for his death.
Just as she came to the crucial part of her poem, a shadow fell upon her parchment. Gabrielle was nice enough about asking the man to move. However, the man had other ideas. In fact, he wanted payment for the freedom of sunlight.
Gabrielle hoped her warning would not go on deaf ears. Of course he had to prove his worth. Just as the fight was becoming interesting, Xena arrived. The bard was more grateful when the man made the comment she was worth a gold piece. Or twenty.
Instead of helping, Xena yelled for her Papa. Not once, but twice and ran away. There were times when the warrior princess had begun to test the bard's fighting skills. But they weren't usually in situations such as this. A little head's up would have been nice.
When the woman standing before her questioned who she was, Gabrielle knew something was off. Xena wasn't one for playing practical jokes. Well, there were the birthday jokes, but it wasn't near either's birthday.
After reading the note, Gabrielle was in disbelief. Two women who looked so much alike? It was unreal. The bard had heard of siblings or cousins looking alike, but two women born some distance apart?
Once the princess began speaking, Gabrielle knew instantly that the woman was telling the truth. Xena could play a part, of that there was no doubt. It was remarkable. It was unreal. It was going to be an interesting time teaching the princess how to act more like her warrior princess.
Like how to groom a horse. While it was true Argo's tail wasn't exactly shiny, brushing it so many times wasn't about to change that fact. There was so much this young, innocent woman didn't know. And Gabrielle thought she had been innocent when she had met Xena.
For one, Princess Diana had no idea about sleeping on the ground. It was rare when they could afford an inn during their travels or even one of the villages offered a warm meal and bed. This was life, not roughing it.
That included food. Gabrielle wasn't even certain what it was Diana said she could have eaten whole. It was cheese or it was nothing. It was another skill the bard hoped Xena would one day teach her.
Diana's request to use the dinars she had to eat at an inn showed just how much she was unlike Xena. It was never the easy way when it came to the warrior princess. Even with one of her plans, she always liked to improvise. And they'd not traveled long together.
There was something in the princess' voice when she spoke of Philemon. Gabrielle didn't know who he was or what his connection was to the princess, but there was something even Diana might not realize.
Those thoughts were quickly placed aside when the stranger emerged from the bushes. Diana was terrified of one of the ordinary people. While his appearance was a bit haggard, Gabrielle understood. It was the times. But the princess had been sheltered behind castle walls.
Diana sadly had no idea what was happening in the kingdom. Which meant her father had no idea what was occurring either. When trusted advisors could no longer be trusted…
It was easy to give what little Gabrielle had to the family for the man wasn't alone. It was sad when one had no place to call home. While the bard and warrior princess chose to travel from place to place, people like these had no choice. Hardworking, but no work to be had.
The princess appeared to be remorseful. Hopefully Diana would be true to her word. That she would, either through her father or personally, see to it that the people who were suffering would receive the help they so desperately required.
Gabrielle should have been paying more attention when the princess began being asked about Xena's weapon. There was only one who could wield the trusty chakram. And when Diana let fly the round killing thing…
Luckily, no damage was done, other than to the king's crown. Gabrielle had never been happier to see her warrior princess. Spending time with Diana had reminded her of just how much in love with Xena she was.
And Gabrielle could finally see the inside of the palace. Granted, it wasn't that long ago that she had spent time at King Gregor's palace. But it was something new. And it fueled her imagination.
Especially since the princess resembled her best friend, so much so, it was nearly impossible to tell them apart. The fact Xena was so insistent on leaving so soon after proving who was the one behind the attempts on Diana's life should have been telling. Yet, the warrior princess hated the life of ease.
The one thing Gabrielle was having issues truly coming to terms with was how easily Xena became a true princess. The gown she was wearing…It caused sensations in the bard she had never truly experienced before.
It wasn't long after they were headed to Corinth that Philemon came for Xena. Before Gabrielle could even say anything, her best friend and Philemon were off. It left Gabrielle to fend for herself, once again.
The walk wasn't too long, but it gave Gabrielle time to think. The fact she had made up time and come across Philemon and Diana, not Xena, had planted an idea in the young bard's mind. If love between two unlikely as Philemon and Diana could flourish, why not between a bard and a warrior princess?
When Xena had agreed it was romantic, it gave Gabrielle hope. And when her warrior princess told her to speak up, the bard nearly did. Something held her back. Why? Wasn't lack of communication the reason the two remained merely friends?
Instead, the conversation turned to trivial things. Like how one could become accustomed to living in a palace, even though it wasn't as easy as one might like to think. It was how they avoided serious conversations. It was pattern.
When would the pattern end? When would either take a chance? And if they ever took the chance, when would they actually stop withholding even the tiniest of details? Hopefully before both were old and grey.
()()()()()()()()()()()()()
Being summoned by a king wasn't all that unusual. But Xena wasn't for hire. Though she'd proven if the cause was worthy, she would fight for whoever was hiring her. Regardless of the reward.
Guards didn't normally salute and allow her to pass. While it could be down to Xena's reputation, there was more to it than that. She would have to be cautious as she made her way to see the king.
The first person she encountered acted as if she knew Xena. And what was with covering her costume? While it wasn't necessarily how most would dress to visit royalty, she wasn't like most people.
Further adding to the mystery was how the young woman made it seem like it would be all right if Xena visited the king in his bed chamber. And her wish was the young woman's command? Something definitely wasn't right.
As soon as she was alone, Xena felt herself under attack. Luckily, there was wine sitting about. With one of her many skills, the warrior dispatched the man who had attacked her. But no one, other than Gabrielle and the King, knew she was at the palace.
Yes, it would have been nice to interrogate the assassin. Sometimes, that wasn't a possibility. The king's reaction to her was not unlike the guards and the young woman. She was missing something.
Xena wasn't for hire, especially for those that could afford it. But then, if a life was on the line, who was the warrior princess to judge? Especially when she came face to face with the princess. Who obviously hadn't been out in the real world.
The princess had no idea her life was in danger. The attempt on the warrior princess' life wasn't on her own. Xena had sensed it was something along those lines. But after seeing Diana, she could understand why an assassin would mistake her for the princess.
Her reputation preceded her. It was King Sisyphus that had informed King Lias of the resemblance. It would definitely play a part in whatever plan Xena was able to place into motion. Her separation from Gabrielle would come in handy.
The fact slavery could be ended in any region of Greece was a worthy cause indeed. Yes, one life was worth fighting for. But the fact so many would continue to suffer if the marriage were to fall apart…
It made sense for Xena to take the princess' place. Definitely before the wedding was to take place. There would never be another marriage in the warrior princess' future. Not even if her bard were to finally be available.
The safest place for Diana would be alongside Gabrielle. While her bard was still in the process of learning the staff, she could defend herself and most innocents without Xena's assistance.
It wasn't as difficult as Xena thought it would be speaking as the princess had. Their encounter had been brief. Yet, she had learned Diana's speech and mannerisms enough to fool her handmaiden, Tesa.
Though Xena hastily learned she would have to watch how far she went. After all, even jokingly saying she was to eat the dog wasn't exactly funny. There were far too many ways she could easily and unknowingly slip.
While Xena needed to learn all she could from Diana, speaking to someone so innocent who looks so much like her was a little unnerving. Was the warrior princess ever so innocent and naïve?
And there was definitely something between Diana and Philemon. Xena wondered what it would take for the princess to admit she would rather be married to Philemon than his brother. Someone who was committed to duty might not be able to.
Having Diana wear her trusty chakram was dangerous. After all, it was capable of great brutality. It wasn't often Xena was without her chakram. It was her signature weapon. One that others easily recognized.
Speaking of easily recognized, referring to ordinary people as little people was a sign. Diana truly did need a lesson in life. Xena only hoped Gabrielle was up to the task, until they could be reunited.
The dress wasn't something Xena was accustomed to. Even before she had become the evil warlord, dresses were not her style. Or if they were, it was something she or her mother had made.
From an attack to roses, Xena knew her mistake. The man had fawn hair. The eye color would confirm he was Diana's betrothed's brother. More explaining as she had reacted first. Yet, her life was on the line as long as she was posing as the princess.
Spending time with Philemon and becoming familiar with the grounds was a very good idea indeed. Attempting to gain information from Philemon would be tricky. There were how many conversations between Philemon and Diana.
Xena had many skills, the harp was not one of them. Luckily, one of them was fighting. The tricky part was to make it appear as if Philemon was doing all the work. It wasn't merely a man's ego. Diana could not defend herself.
How could anyone put up with this kind of preparation? A thousand brushstrokes each day? It was unreal. And unnecessary. Unlike how many times she did her sword drills or flips to make certain she was ready for anything.
Sitting out the dinner was dangerous. Yes, Xena could slip, but the princess must meet her fiancé as well as be there for the leaders. It wouldn't be easy, but nothing the warrior princess ever did was easy.
So Xena couldn't courtesy. She could do many other things. Like spot a man who had too much to lose if the marriage were to take place. Already, the walking gem mine was at the top of her list of suspects.
Dinner was eventful. Especially when Xena, er the princess, was asked to play the harp. It was a good thing her fingers were strong. The harp would have to be restrung before it could be of any use to anyone.
Xena was grateful to roam free from the constant scrutiny. Unfortunately, Philemon had followed her. And suspected she wasn't who she was. Luckily, it didn't take much for the warrior princess to convince him she was who she was and that she only wanted Diana safe.
They were rudely interrupted by the latest attempt on Diana's life. It was used to catch the assassin. They were able to catch the man. Xena was able to use the pinch to proffer the information she required.
It seemed too easy the explanation. Not that Bromeus wasn't behind the attacks. In fact, it made perfect sense. But to do this alone? Xena wasn't certain. For now, she would see how things played out.
The fact Bromeus was found hung meant little to nothing. Yes, it could prove his guilt. But it could just as easily prove he was merely the fall guy. The way the king accepted so easily the guilt spoke to the man being the fall guy. As well as did the way Glauce spoke.
Was Xena speaking of Gabrielle or the princess when she informed Philemon Diana belonged to no one. How she had missed even Gabrielle's voice at this point. Hopefully she and the princess were staying out of trouble.
At least Diana had learned something from her short time away from the castle. If nothing else, that was a positive. Yes, sadly, Diana did have a future husband to meet. If only Philemon or Diana would speak up.
Of course, they weren't the only ones. Xena knew she couldn't continue to hide her true feelings towards her bard. And Gabrielle couldn't hide her feelings. It had deeply hurt Gabrielle when she had referred to her as a sister.
Now for the difficult part. Xena had to convince her best friend they couldn't remain. That Corinth was awaiting them. What Xena truly wanted to do was to have alone time with Gabrielle. Perhaps they could actually communicate for once.
Xena had already suspected Bromeus had been murdered. Philemon merely confirmed her suspicions. It was easy to send him out of the way. He could, hopefully, have a real conversation with the woman he loved. Unfortunately, it would leave Gabrielle out of the loop.
It wasn't long before the conspiracy continued. If Xena hadn't been alert, both she and Glauce could have been killed. But she used her many fighting skills. It was nearly comical the way Glauce would pass on her, merely because she was a warrior and not a princess.
Yet Xena could learn to live the life of a princess. It had its positives and negatives. The desserts were one of the things the warrior princess could definitely become accustomed to. For now, it was time for their next adventure. And to perhaps have a true conversation with her best friend.
()()()()()()()()()()()()()
Back under the stars. It's the way things were meant to be. At least in the immediate future it was how things were meant to be. Gabrielle, at one time, had trouble sleeping beneath the stars. Now, there were times when she slept too well.
Tonight was not one of them. In fact, Gabrielle was having trouble sleeping for distinct reason. In a way, she had witnessed two Xenas. While one was a princess in the truest definition, there was no one like her warrior princess.
Why was Gabrielle having trouble sleeping? Simple. She had watched Diana take a chance on love. It had been decree that the princess marry the elder of the two brothers. But there hadn't been love between them.
There hadn't even been a meeting between them. After speaking to both Diana and Philemon in private briefly before they had left, Gabrielle knew it had been Xena who had encouraged both to follow their hearts.
Regardless of how both were committed to peace, ending slavery and their royal duties, Diana had taken that chance. She had told Philemon how she felt. And, after a moment of hesitation, he had admitted he shared in the feelings.
Gabrielle decided that lack of sleep could be constructive. No, it couldn't stir her creative juices. Besides a few notes here and there, the bard hadn't truly written a story. Her diary flowed, most of the time.
So what was a bard to do in the middle of the night? There was a full moon. Why not take advantage of it? Gabrielle wondered where her warrior was as she gathered her bathing essentials.
If Xena couldn't sleep, she was most likely performing her drills. She could also be fishing or hunting. Either way, the warrior princess was nowhere to be found. The full moon lit the path well. Still, Gabrielle remained on full alert.
"Where do you think you are going?" Gabrielle stopped in her tracks. Xena was sweating. She loosely held her sword at her side. She wasn't wearing her leathers. Her expression was one of anger.
"I thought about taking a midnight bath." Gabrielle held up her towel and soap. "Or would you rather I remain at camp by myself?" Had it been the snappish way in which Xena had asked where she was heading or was it her own lack of sleep causing the anger in her voice?
Xena was startled by the tone of voice. While it could be the lack of sleep, she wondered if it was because of the continued strain. The strain by both women to deny their true feelings for one another was continuing to take their toll.
"Perhaps I can join you. And you can tell me what you think about Diana and Philemon." Xena waited for a reaction. There was little flinching on her bard's part. In fact, no words were said as Gabrielle returned to the path she had been on.
The warrior princess took that as an invitation. She didn't bother with her towel. Instead, Xena fell in step with her bard. It wasn't long before both had discovered the reason Xena had chosen that particular campsite.
The waterfall had to be at least four hundred feet in the air. Gabrielle hadn't realized they were so close to the hills. Most likely, Xena had. It meant they weren't far from Amazon lands. It would be interesting to revisit. Hopefully one day they could, if only to see what her legacy was.
Instead of merely swimming, the two women stood under the waterfall. It surprised Gabrielle how warm the water was. She knew the sun heated the waters during the day, but it still felt unusual that it should be this warm.
"We're only about a day or so away from one of the most active volcanoes in Greece. It's why the water remains warm, night or day." Xena watched her bard. "We're also half a day from your fellow Amazons. I know you want to return. Just give me the word."
It was funny. Xena was normally a woman of few words. To Gabrielle, it was almost as if her best friend was nervous. Was it because the bard had witnessed two soulmates finally admitting their love?
Or was it merely her warrior princess attempting to teach her? Gabrielle wasn't certain. "I would like to return to the village. To see first-hand how Ephiny and the others are doing. It's been too long. Just like I'd love to visit your mother. I really didn't get a chance to during my only trip to Amphipolis."
So, this was how it was to be. Xena hated it. As she watched her bard bathe, she knew she would have to open up. To attempt to bridge the canyon that seemed to have been caused by one utterance of the warrior princess.
Xena wasn't naïve. She knew exactly what she had said. And she was nearly a hundred percent certain that it was because Gabrielle was in love with her. Now was a warrior princess braver than a royal princess? Or was Diana the brave one?
When the words wouldn't come, Xena's mind returned to the reason she had been away from camp. Yes, she had felt she needed to work out after the decadent lifestyle of the castle. It wasn't for long, but she had still felt the need for it.
Marcus. Why had he suddenly entered her mind? He was one person who had touched her life more than others. And she had loved him, in her own way. But he hadn't been the love of her life. And he certainly hadn't been her soulmate.
Perhaps her thoughts were upon Marcus because of his recent demise. She had never truly told Marcus how much she cared. It wasn't right. What was more wrong was the fact she refused to inform Gabrielle how much she was in love with her.
Just as Xena was about to reveal her true feelings, her senses heightened. How had she missed her bard not being there? The warrior princess was in a panic as she scanned the pond the waterfall pooled in.
The full moon came from behind its hiding place. Xena's heart nearly skipped a beat as she saw the crimson in the water. There was no hesitation as she easily dove in the fairly deep waters.
It didn't take long to locate Gabrielle. It took even less time for Xena to bring them both back to the surface. She carried the limp body of her best friend to where she had left her towel. Not bothering with the towel, Xena hastily inspected her bard's body from head to toe.
Already, there were scars upon Gabrielle's body. Xena cursed herself for the few injuries her best friend had incurred. It was with relief that the warrior princess discovered the bump on the head. It wouldn't require stitches, just being wrapped.
Luckily, Gabrielle sputtered before taking deep breaths. Emerald eyes opened slowly. There was a haze to them, but Xena was certain she had been recognized. "Don't scare me like that, Gabrielle. I can't…"
This was not the time. And yet, this was the perfect time. "Gabrielle, we need to talk. When you are up for it." Xena felt the shiver run through her bard's body. Though she knew it wasn't because she was physically cold, Xena took the time to wrap her bard's body before carrying her the short distance to the camp.
Xena made certain both were dressed, the fire was stoked before she settled next to her bard. Gabrielle's head was tightly wrapped. In only a day or two, she would be able to travel. For now, they would have to remain where they were.
"Gabrielle, you have a concussion. You're going to have to stay awake. We'll have to camp here for the next two days." Eyes were glassy. Xena wasn't certain if her bard was understanding her or not.
"There's something else." Xena was grateful there was a tree not far from the fire. She had her bedroll propped against it so she could lean more comfortably. Gabrielle's head was cradled in her lap.
"I don't know if you'll remember any of this, but I have to say it." Xena took a deep breath. "I love you. More than as a sister. More than as merely family. I don't think I could live my life without you in it."
Emerald eyes blinked. Gabrielle wasn't certain she had heard her best friend correctly. Those were words she always wanted to hear. Yet, she wasn't certain if Xena was saying those words because that's how she felt, if it was because of their latest adventure or if it was because the bard had been harmed once again.
"You don't have to say anything." Xena chose not to look in emerald eyes. "Just know that I love you. And no matter how you feel, we'll always be friends." There was no response. The rest of the evening was spent in silence.
The sun hitting her face caused Xena to awaken. She glanced around. The fire was out, but there was still a little bit of smoke emanating from it. Everything seemed in place, including Argo happily munching on grass not far away.
When emerald eyes opened, they remained slightly glassy. Xena cursed herself for allowing Gabrielle to fall asleep. It wasn't the worst thing, but it wasn't the best under the circumstances.
"Morning." Gabrielle seemed to immediately focus at the sound of the warrior's voice. "Let me check on your wound." There was no word or sound from the bard. It didn't take long for Xena to realize the wound didn't need the wrap, but would have to be careful of. "Do you remember what happened?"
Gabrielle cleared her throat. The last thing she remembered was being under the spray of the waterfall. "I was enjoying the warm shower. The next thing I knew, the sun was in my face. What happened?"
Xena's heart sank. She had opened her heart. She had admitted her true feelings. And it had been for nothing. Instantly, the stoic warrior came to the surface. "You scared me. You slipped on the rock. Luckily, it was only a minor cut and concussion. We'll need you to rest for the next two days. No traveling, I'm afraid."
There was more. How Gabrielle knew, she was uncertain. Even with the stoic façade, she knew Xena was hurting. Had the bard admitted her feelings and now didn't remember? Or was it the other way around?
Or had they discussed something else that was just as hurtful? Gabrielle knew Xena wouldn't open her heart once again if she had admitted her feelings. And the bard didn't dare admit her feelings.
What were they to do? They were to spend the next two days in near paradise conditions. It wasn't the palace they had just left, but they had access to a heated waterfall or pond. There was an unlimited supply of fish.
For Gabrielle, the best part was the words were coming to her once again. By the time they broke camp, she was nearly out of ink and parchment. She would have to tell some tales so that she could continue to scribe her stories.
For Xena, the best part was leaving the site behind. Perhaps one day it wouldn't be a painful reminder. She could have easily lost Gabrielle. But worse was pouring her heart out only to not have her bard remember. Oh the irony of life. The agony of life. And yet, they had so much to look forward to. Xena had to hold onto that as they faced their next adventure.