My head still hurts when I think of how I felt when I finally recovered from the henbane. I don't know if I ever fully recovered from my embarrassment. I came so close to letting slip how I felt about Xena.

Not that that would have been the end of the world. In fact, it would have saved a great deal of heartache. As I've said before in these chronicles, things happen for a reason. I have to believe that.

Otherwise, how can I live with the death of Perdicus. I have to live with the blood of so many on my hands. Some innocent, some not so much. The one that will forever haunt me is the sweet man from Potidaea.

In our travels, we've discovered that some things can be changed. Like when Xena told me the story of her wish and the life I would have lived. While it spared her brother's life, so many more were affected in a negative way, including her mother.

There was the oddity that should have changed everything. The threads of fate were changed by one man. It was meant to keep us apart. Yet, we found one another. We righted what Caesar had attempted to wrong for his own gain.

Then there was the most painful of times, at least for Xena. She was cursed or gifted with seeing our fate. Seeing us both on the cross. We weren't able to change fate that time.

I have to pause. As I'm thinking of something that saddens me, Xena is by my side. She is offering something warm to drink. The temperatures are dropping. But we are in our hut with all the warmth and love in the world.

Still, a little comfort, such as hot cider, is something my warrior princess would offer. Before Xena can say it, I write it. Yes, later there will be a more pleasurable way to remain warm. It has her blushing, oh so slightly.

All this because I remember exactly how close I came to telling Xena I loved her. That I was in love with her. The only question I would have had if I had informed her? Would my warrior princess have believed me or would she have thought it would be because of the henbane?

What it boils down to is another adventure where we nearly discovered our feelings for one another. There were too many like that. Until my last breath, I will regret waiting so long. But I've come to accept that our journeys were not about merely our love for one another.

Though it made fighting nearly every day of our lives tolerable, our journeys were about the people we helped. They were about the good we could do. They were about fighting for a better world.

And when one man is seeking power at the cost of poisoning his own father, we stood up. We fought the best we could. And did it side by side, as we continue to do. And will, until there is no breath in us.

()()()()()()()()()()()()()

To most, a fishing lesson would include a pole or net. Not when you are learning from the warrior princess. Xena's many skills included using her hands to catch fish. Gabrielle was a willing student.

Gabrielle couldn't help feeling elated when Xena praised her. And when she had actually caught the fish with her bare hands? It was something she would soon never forget.

The sensation didn't last long. There was trouble. With only a glance, they both were acting. Xena didn't care if anyone saw her in all her glory. In fact, it could be used to her advantage. Gabrielle on the other hand hastily made quick work of dressing and seeing that the young man was safe.

There was the usual fight, but Xena had to use special weapons to keep things interesting. These men were half decent fighters. But why were they after the young boy? Fighting them off was the first priority. Then they could learn the young boy's name and why anyone would want to harm him.

Finally, the one in charge of the boyhunt emerged. The way he spoke to Xena was…There was something Gabrielle instantly disliked and distrusted about the man.

As always, Xena used her wit to succinctly put the man in his place. At the same time, she made certain the young boy knew he was safe. The use of maternal instinct was quite surprising to the bard.

The man wouldn't go without a warning. What was worse was discovering why the young boy was being hunted. Who would be capable of sacrificing a young child? Gabrielle nearly lost the contents of her stomach when he confided it was his own father.

It became even more disturbing when Icus revealed it was his own brother who had been hunting him. Nothing made sense, at least to Gabrielle.

Religion. Zealots. It was disturbing what some would do to prove their faith and devotion to one of the Gods. Gabrielle had prayed to various Gods, especially Aphrodite. But she would never even think of sacrificing another for a God.

Gabrielle lost track of her warrior princess as Icus continued to explain what he thought was happening with his mother and father. Leave it to Xena to have a cave where the wounded men from her army would seek shelter.

Before Xena even said anything, Gabrielle knew what was to happen. The warrior princess would confront Icus' family to see what kind of people could do this to their child while the bard cared for the young boy.

It took a moment to settle, if you could call it that, after Xena had left. Gabrielle wasn't blind to how worried Icus was. Hopefully one of her rousing stories would help to distract the young man.

Instead, Icus became even more lost in thought. It was clear once Gabrielle made the story completely unbelievable that the young man could not be distracted by words.

Meaning only to continue distracting Icus, Gabrielle's stomach once again seemed to overpower her. She hadn't meant to take the supplies Icus' mother had lovingly packed for him. But it had been since her last adventure home that she had enjoyed nutbread.

How had Gabrielle wound up on the floor of the cave? She could hear Xena's voice, but everything was fuzzy. And the bard couldn't see a thing.

Open her eyes? Why hadn't Gabrielle thought of that? Leave it to her warrior princess to be so intelligent. In fact, it was clever of Xena to notice she wasn't standing and to aid her to her feet.

As soon as Gabrielle was standing, she was looking into the face of a Goddess. Xena was the most beautiful woman she had ever laid eyes on. It was easy to tell the warrior princess just that. If Xena hadn't gone on about being drugged or something, the bard might have confessed how much she loved Xena.

Why was Xena so concerned that Gabrielle walk? After all, the bard had been walking from a very early age. Not about walking? About Icus? Where was the young lad? Oh Gods, Gabrielle had lost Icus!

Hopefully Xena was correct that Icus was safe. What did the nutbread have to do with anything? Gabrielle already felt guilty for taking food from a growing boy. Why did her warrior princess have to torment her so?

Charge! Gabrielle needed all her recruits to help find Icus. But why did Xena want her and her cohorts to remain? Oh! So the bard and the others could work on their song. After all, the altos had been a little flat as of late.

Clear? Not really. Even being fuzzy around the edges, Xena was the most beautiful woman Gabrielle had ever had the privilege of seeing. And better yet, she traveled alongside the warrior princess.

Why were the others so stiff? Music was about enjoyment. It was about entertaining. Gabrielle had a lot of work cut out for her if she were to shape them into a decent choir.

While not perfect, everything was coming together. Gabrielle hadn't realized how destined she was to lead a choir. It was so much fun. But there was something not exactly right. What could it be?

That was when one of her singers said something. There were too many voices to hear clearly. Once she did, Gabrielle had to agree. It was time to locate her warrior princess.

There were a few wrong turns, as it always seemed there was for Gabrielle. Even when she had returned to Potidaea, the bard had had to use the map just to remain on course.

Perhaps, one could say the same thing when it came to Gabrielle's relationship with Xena. They would remain friends, of that there was no doubt. If she had faith, they would become more. She would merely have to remain on course.

Gabrielle happened upon the hut. The strange lady was nice, if not confused. When Xena took a firm hold of her, the bard was grateful. But why wouldn't her warrior princess believe her that a gravelly voiced rock had spoken to her?

No matter what she did, Gabrielle couldn't sit still. She had to be on the move. That's when she found herself at the point of a knife once again. It was because the man they'd met at the lake wanted Xena to concede.

That wouldn't happen. Neither would Xena allowing her to go anywhere. Gabrielle thought the times for remaining behind while her warrior princess did the fighting was coming to an end. Apparently not.

Quality time together. Gabrielle hadn't expected it to be so intimate. And with their lives hanging in the balance, literally. Luckily, Xena was strong and was holding them both from falling to their doom.

Don't let go of Xena's hand? In a moment of clarity, Gabrielle knew that meant so much more to her. It wasn't a revelation. It was merely the drugs beginning to wear off, thankfully.

As Xena continued to do all the work, Gabrielle wondered what was happening. She vaguely remembered the cavern. She vaguely remembered being held at knifepoint. But everything else was fuzzy.

The pounding of her head was explained by being drugged. Had Gabrielle taken the drug willingly? Or had she accidentally ingested it?

It wasn't only Gabrielle's head that was ailing. It wouldn't take much for the bard to become physically ill. There was, unfortunately, far too much to do.

Gabrielle was saddled with trying to obtain the loud talking thing Mael was using to drive his father to kill his brother. Why was one man so jealous of his youngest sibling?

It was an impossible task. Just when Gabrielle thought she'd retrieved the device, it slipped through her grasp. Unless she had Xena's whip, there was no way of recovering it. The only thing to do was join her warrior princess.

Luckily, Icus had been saved. But how? Since Gabrielle hadn't retrieved the loud talking thing, who could have spoken? Who could have saved Icus?

The bard wasn't certain which was more intriguing. The thought of one true God or who spoke. If there was a God at play, whether the one true one, then it would explain a few things.

It seemed Xena was at a loss, as much as Gabrielle was. It would be something they could discuss, perhaps, to continue to avoid their growing feelings.

()()()()()()()()()()()()()

Xena was enjoying herself. It was a rarity, it seemed. While she loved traveling with her bard, there was always fighting. Fighting for the greater good. Fighting for those that can't fight for themselves. Most importantly, fighting her own feelings toward Gabrielle.

Watching as Gabrielle attempted to do as she was taught caused Xena to smile. Or how excited her bard was when she finally caught a fish with her hands. Or was it the fact neither was dressed and they had this particular lake to themselves.

Or so Xena had thought. Just after Gabrielle had done as she had been taught, there was a commotion. With a nod, Xena dove under the water while her bard made it for the shore.

One thing Xena had learned a long time ago was how to make an entrance. Whether it was alone or with her army, she had learned first impressions could be everything. Or distracting.

It caused the man attempting to take a young boy against his will to pause. The water gliding from her naked body as dark hair clung to her skin was probably a sight to behold.

It was enough for the man to release his grasp. Hopefully Gabrielle already had the boy somewhere safe. Soon, there were more of them to fend off. Using the string of fish, Xena was able to defeat the men.

The authority in the voice alone informed Xena the latest man to enter the fray thought he was in charge. At least enough so that the men stopped fighting. Who was he to decide it was not her concern when grown men attacked a young boy? It was definitely the warrior princess' business when armed men were after a young boy.

There was a part of Xena that nearly flinched. The use of maternal instinct was…Even Gabrielle had no inkling of Xena's offspring. Her own mother didn't know she had a grandchild. And that was the way it had to remain.

Xena nearly lost her cool when Icus informed them of why his brother and his men wanted the young boy. What kind of God would order the sacrifice of a young boy to prove one's faith? Especially one's own child?

The warrior princess was definitely ready to discover all she could about Icus' father and family. Surely his mother would not condone such actions.

At least Icus' mother had attempted to warn him and help him escape. The only problem? His mother probably wouldn't be able to help him further.

If Xena was as aware of her surroundings as she normally was, the cave she had sheltered her wounded men was nearby. It took only a moment for her to find it. It would make a perfect place for Icus and Gabrielle to hide out until she returned from a little information gathering.

It didn't take long to find father and son. It was clear Anteus wasn't well. It was even clearer that Maell was attempting to rule his father. He was definitely hiding something.

At least Anteus sounded concerned when he realized Xena had his youngest son. It was different than how his oldest son had reacted, adding to her natural dislike of Maell.

If Anteus didn't want to kill his son, why? Xena had heard of the Gods requiring much from their followers. But taking the life of an innocent? And Anteus, even hating it, going along with it?

Xena had to leave the father/son duo with a warning. There had better be a change of heart or Icus would remain with her. It wouldn't be ideal to have a young boy traveling with them, but it would be safer than leaving him with his own family. Hopefully, it wouldn't come to that.

As Xena made her way back to Gabrielle and Icus, it was fitting she would find Icus' mother praying to one of the Greek Gods. It made sense. Hestia, the Goddess of home and family, would be where a mother sought comfort.

The warrior princess listened. It wasn't that long ago Anteus would never had agreed to sacrifice his son. It wasn't until Anteus was ordered to break with tradition and name Icus as his successor that he changed.

Already, Xena had had an inkling there was more to Maell than claiming to do the wishes of his God. There was anger. Now it was clear there was also jealousy. Especially if Maell knew of the order.

There was more as Icus' mother continued. Anteus had become secretive. He had been acting strangely. The way she pleaded with the warrior princess had Xena knowing she couldn't not help this family.

It was best not to be seen with Xena. Before the warrior princess disappeared, she heard the pleadings of a mother. Nutbread? The kind her bard loved so much. Nothing more was said when it was revealed Maell had made the loaf specifically for his father.

Xena's fears were coming true as she discovered Gabrielle on the floor of the cave. If the situation weren't so serious, it could very well be amusing.

In fact, the warrior princess was having all she could do to not smile as Gabrielle claimed not to be able to see. Drugging was confirmed as the bard didn't realize she wasn't standing.

Attempting to discover Icus' whereabouts was not easy with a drugged bard. It was clear Xena would have to leave Gabrielle behind and search for the young boy.

The way in which Gabrielle had exclaimed just how beautiful Xena was had the warrior princess wondering. She had known the bard cared for her. Perhaps even attracted to her. Yes, even in love with her.

But the emphatic way in which Gabrielle had said those words…Xena had to work to focus on the real challenge ahead, which was saving Icus from all threats.

It wasn't easy leaving Gabrielle behind, especially the way in which the bard was behaving. Hopefully she would remain in the cavern. It was the safest place for Gabrielle.

It took a little doing, but Xena found Icus. She managed to keep the young boy from harm. It wasn't long before they were on their way, only to find Anteus.

The voice was overpowering. Xena wasn't certain where it had come from. There was no way it was a God. For now, she had to see to Anteus. He needed rest.

Xena couldn't help the verbal jab. No, she didn't think much of any kind of people that would allow the sacrifice of a child. After all, she had given up everything, just so her own son would be safe.

The fact Anteus continued to struggle with his faith and decision to sacrifice spoke volumes of the man. Still, Xena couldn't allow for the man to kill his own son. The confession that there was a part of Anteus that hoped she succeeded was the one that spoke volumes.

They made it to the hut. Xena was grateful to find Icus' mother safe. Her concern for both son and husband were crystal clear. And sadly, was necessary.

Of course, Gabrielle wouldn't have remained in the cavern. Recovering from being drugged or sober, the bard would only remain behind so long. Xena had discovered that, many times over.

The fact a rock had informed Gabrielle to come find her hopefully would not be lost on Anteus. If the bard was hearing voices, so could Anteus.

That was when Xena noticed Icus. Something had the young boy distracted. The warrior princess attempted to get him to confide in her, only to discover the hard way what it was he had seen.

Maell and his men. In fact, the eldest held Gabrielle at knifepoint. It was a mistake to threaten her bard. As many had already discovered.

Savages? Xena knew she could be classified as one, especially with her past ways. But to be called that by someone drugging his father so that he would kill his youngest son so that Maell could inherit all the power was not something she was willing to accept.

Icus proved what a good person he was as he offered to sacrifice himself so that Xena and Gabrielle could go free. For the moment, it was best if she gave in.

It wasn't long until Xena found herself in a deep hole. She had to catch Gabrielle. If nothing else, this would make for a great workout. Especially when the bard began to fall. Luckily, it didn't take much to secure the bard. If the situation was different, the warrior would enjoy having Gabrielle holding her the way she was.

Now for the fun part. Xena would have to climb. As she said to her bard, enjoying every moment of it. Except for the part where Gabrielle nearly took her head off once they reached the top of the well.

It was a good thing Gabrielle's head was hurting. It meant the henbane was wearing off. The hangover would be worse than if the bard had overindulged in alcohol. Xena didn't envy her.

Especially since they needed to separate. Having discovered Maell was behind the voice, they needed to retrieve the loud talking thing. That was the bard's job. It was Xena's to attempt to talk Maell out of killing his brother.

It was sad how conceited Maell was. It was why he thought his plan would work. No one would suspect a religious man, such as himself, of actually attempting to have his father kill his younger brother so that he could have all the power.

As always, it wasn't about who was more powerful. It was about who was studied. Who knew the moves an opponent could make. And be able to counter those moves. It had Maell dangling.

Xena offered mercy, but Maell chose his fate. And in the end, claiming it was God's will that he die. All of this would be for nothing if the warrior princess could not save Icus.

The chakram was flying. Its target was true. At the last moment, the voice spoke. Gabrielle must have retrieved the loud talking thing. If she hadn't, Anteus would have lost his hand, at the very least.

The family was reunited and safe. While they could celebrate the life of Icus, they would have to deal with what Maell had attempted to do. And continue to reconcile their faith in one God.

As they began to walk, Xena realized how much Gabrielle remained suffering. The headache had to be beyond belief. The warrior princess had done stupid things to her body over the years and knew what the bard was dealing with.

The fact Gabrielle had not retrieved the loud talking thing, yet had heard the voice also had Xena thinking. Was there a true God? Was it one of the Greek Gods? Someone had spoken. But who?

It would make for an interesting discussion. After all, Xena didn't want to face how beautiful Gabrielle thought she was. It was difficult enough knowing her bard was in love with her and burying the confession deep within.

()()()()()()()()()()()()()

"How's the head?" Xena was grateful that, for once, her bard had accepted to ride behind her on Argo. While they could have remained, at least for the night with Icus' family, it was time to move on.

In fact, Xena had saved some dinars. It was time they once again made it to the next village. It was dinner and a place to rest Gabrielle's head upon.

"Still pounding, thanks." Gabrielle couldn't believe how her head ached. It was even greater than when the pinch had been used. Her head had felt like it was exploding. Now, it seemed to be exploding.

"Just hold on a little. When we stop for the night, I'll try and ease it." Xena felt the grasp around her tighten. How she could become accustomed to riding like this.

Argo might not always appreciate having to carry them both, but there was a part of Xena that missed the contact when her bard walked beside her.

"I will. And thanks. I'm surprised my stomach isn't more upset." Gabrielle reluctantly unwound one hand so that she could pat Argo on the hip. "No offense, but usually being this high up and the motion makes me a little sick."

As if understanding, Argo whinnied. She also pranced a little. "Easy, Girl. I thought you and Gabrielle had come to an understanding."

Once again, Argo was letting her displeasure to be known. "It won't be much longer and you can be free of both of us." Xena leaned in to whisper in Argo's ear, careful not to dislodge her bard. "So be nice."

One more nod of the head and whinny before Argo continued to carry her riders along. There was the scent the horse hated. It was people. She liked the freedom of the trails. She enjoyed sweet grass. Most likely, she would be confined to a stable somewhere.

"Where are we?" Gabrielle had been lulled nearly to sleep. It wasn't normal. She must still be sick from the henbane. They were somewhere she had never been before.

"It's a small horse breading village." Xena glanced around. It hadn't changed much since she had been here last. The fact it was with her army as they had marched against another city might not make her the most welcomed of boarders.

"I thought I smelled something familiar." Gabrielle could feel the horse dung that she had held in her hand as proof it wasn't centaurs behind the attack on her sister amazons.

Xena shook her head. For someone raised on a farm, Gabrielle wasn't all that keen on the smells at times. "Perhaps it's time for a real bath."

The shot to her back had been expected. The hug had not. Xena thought it would have taken Gabrielle sooner to realize why she had taken them along this path. "I have some dinars. I thought we could use a night in a real bed and a meal neither of us cooks."

Gabrielle wasn't certain what to say. She knew that things had been a little strained since her return home. It was her wording when she had left Xena that had them strained so. "It's not been since home I've had a bed. Even then, had to share with Lila."

"There will be no sharing if the inn still has the rooms they used to." At the edge of the village, Xena pulled up gently on the reins. She turned so she was able to look Gabrielle in the eyes. "I should warn you. I marched through here with my army. We took some of their horses and didn't pay. Some might not be thrilled with my arrival."

The bard took a deep breath. While a night in a soft bed and a hot bath sounded heavenly, Gabrielle was accustomed to sleeping on the ground and bathing in a stream or lake. "I'll hold on tight, just in case."

There was a twinkle in emerald eyes. Xena should have known her bard wouldn't complain. After all, Gabrielle had remained by her side throughout Ares' attempt to bring her back into the fold. That had led to Xena striking her.

"All right." Xena had Argo moving once again. They remained silent as they made their way through the small village. While there were some glances, the warrior princess knew they were for newcomers.

They made it to the stables before anyone even said anything to them. A young boy met the pair. Xena helped her bard to the ground before dismounting herself. "Just one horse?"

"If it's all right for Xena and her friend Gabrielle to stay here." Xena wanted to make certain it was known who she was so they could avoid trouble.

"Been a long time." The stable door opened. A man with only one leg emerged. There was a scar that ran from his left ear to his neck.

Xena froze. She hadn't expected to see anyone from her old army in the village. "I'd forgotten we were forced to leave you here, Lars."

An expression full of hate graced the man's face. It didn't last. Lars held out his hand. "It's the best thing you did for me. The maiden who worked at the inn took pity on me. She helped me to heal. This is my son, our son."

The warrior princess relaxed. "I'm happy for you. There are too many things I regret from that time." Xena remembered Gabrielle was standing there. "This is my best friend. We've been traveling together for nearly a season. She's a bard so if there's a need of a storyteller…"

Lars leaned on his crutch. "I'm not certain. The inn has changed hands. This village isn't the same as the one you left me in. While I'm better off, not everyone is."

"Story of the times." Xena sighed. "If you'll care for Argo, we'll see to a room. If not, I hope there's room in the loft for an old friend."

"Always." Lars took a tentative step forward. "Just be careful of who you tell of your name. Too many cutthroats like to call this place home."

"Understand." Xena took her saddlebags before relinquishing Argo's reins. "We should be safe in the stable, if not the hot meal and soft bed I promised you."

"I'm used to sleeping under the stars. A night in the stables, even with the smell, will be a nice change." Gabrielle felt better. And she realized something. She had to hold onto her time with Xena. No matter how little or long they had together.

"Come on then." It wasn't long before they were at the bar. The smell of supper was even causing Xena's stomach to growl. A familiar face was behind the bar. One she hadn't seen since her warrior days. "Last time I saw you was in Tracus."

"I thought that was you." The warrior placed two mugs of ale upon the bar. "You are welcome here. But it's not a place, at least after dark, for those that don't know how to take care of themselves."

Gabrielle leaned upon her staff. "This isn't just a walking stick." The man behind the bar's laughter startled the bard. Though she was angry, she chose to show him exactly how adept she was at it. She eased herself through the exercises Xena had designed just for her.

The man held up his hands in defeat. "I guess that old saying about judging a centaur by the size of his hooves apply." The man blushed. "Sorry, that was crude."

"I travel with the warrior princess." Gabrielle wasn't innocent anymore, but the image was a bit more than she wanted.

"Now that we have the pleasantries over with, how about a hot meal and a room?" Xena nearly punched the ex warlord. It was understandable talk with most of his clientele.

"I can have two meals sent up." The man turned his back. It was something he wasn't accustomed to doing to his regulars. "It's the one at the far back on the left. I assumed you'd want your privacy."

"Always." Xena took the key. It wasn't long before they were settled in the room. Her old frenemy had read her right. There were two beds, along with a small bathtub.

"You can use the bathtub first. I want to secure the room before the meals arrive." There was no argument from the bard. "I won't ask again, but how is your head?"

"I'd nearly forgotten it was pounding." Gabrielle had placed her parchments on one of the beds. She had already set to removing her leathers.

"I'll work on that, after I secure the place." Xena placed her chakram under her pillow. She placed a solid chair against the door. It would open, but would impede the intruder.

By the time Xena turned around, her bard was already naked. The water in the bathtub was clean, but cool. It was perfect. Xena slowly made her way toward her bard.

The warrior princess swallowed hard as her hands were touching soft skin. Xena began by massaging Gabrielle's shoulders, before making her way to the back of the bard's neck.

It would be so easy to kiss the silky skin. But this was about making Gabrielle's head feel better, not about Xena's libido and her attraction to her bard.

If Xena were honest, it would be so easy to make love to Gabrielle. But she wasn't ready. She wasn't certain her bard was. Perhaps soon, they would be able to take their relationship to the next level.

The knock on the door was more than welcomed for Xena. There was a screen the warrior princess used to hide her bard. Soon, the meals were placed on the table between the beds. Soon, the meals were consumed.

It was Xena's turn for a bath. She could hear the scribbling of quill to parchment. What was her bard writing about? Was it learning of the belief in one true God? Or was it her personal diary.

Gabrielle was upon her bed in the night clothes she rarely wore. It was best to remain in her traveling clothes in case there was trouble of some kind.

Her quill would not stop moving. It wasn't analyzing the possibility of one God. It was analyzing her feelings. The way her body had reacted as Xena had massaged her. And how it had felt when she had had azure eyes upon her as she learned to fish with her hands.

How many times was Gabrielle going to allow one of these opportunities to pass her by? When would they have privacy like they were enjoying now? The bard vowed to hide her feelings, until they were alone again. In some strange village. In some strange room. She would make the first move.