One of the more difficult chapters for me to write is this one. It's not so much the emotional aspect, as I never actually experienced the adventure.
I remember the detailed story Xena imparted on me as we snuggled the night before we were to meet a friend. A friend I wish Xena had told me a few more details about. Yet, he was an amazing man who Xena didn't see as anything but a friend.
According to my soulmate, Lyceus and I hit it off right away. In fact, it seems her brother was quite taken by me. All I can say is like brother like sister. In this case, perhaps it's a good thing I have no memory of the events.
It must have been difficult enough for Xena to watch as Lyceus fell for me. But who was I inclined toward? Do I want to know? Or do I already know in my heart of hearts.
I can wonder what I would have been like had Xena not been there to rescue me. If my family had been killed, or even if I were separated from them, what my life would have been like.
Worse was how I would have struggled to survive as a slave. Beaten. No rights. Raped. The evilness of slavery still chills me. I can only hope that future generations will read of our chronicles and understand that no human should ever own another.
As for my soulmate, how did Xena cope with the loss of her mother and the amazons? Did having her brother in her life make up for those losses?
We had just made love for the first time. It would have been difficult enough had we merely declared our feelings for one another. But to have physically expressed them?
My mind spins at the emotions I am experiencing at the possibility of being granted the wish Xena was given. The life of a young boy attempting to be something he was not. It's what he thought society wanted for him.
Just like society wanted me to settle for Perdicas. And I nearly did. Another of those extremely emotional and sensitive stories I'll soon have to force myself to live through. If only so future generations can see the truth.
Which is love every moment of your life. Be true to yourself. But most of all, don't be afraid of the 'what ifs' in life. Take what you want, yet fight for the greater good.
In this adventure, it was Xena having to learn what her life would have been like had she not taken up a sword. Had she not met me and rescued me that long ago day.
It wasn't our last adventure granting us the gift of seeing what our lives would have been like had we not met the way we did. Had we not followed the same path. Sometimes diverging, but always, always walking it side by side.
REMEMBER NOTHING
Honoring your family. It was something Gabrielle could understand, especially after they had finally made love. It made all the difference in the world.
It made Gabrielle enjoy the little things. As much as she had wanted to wrap her arms around her soulmate, walking had new meaning since nearly having left the known world.
It stung a little when Xena had said Gabrielle didn't have to come. After all, wasn't the bard family? Even before taking their relationship to the physical level, hadn't they said they were family numerous times.
What would it have been like to have another sibling, this one male? Hearing how close Xena and her brother had been caused Gabrielle to wonder.
There were a great deal of things causing Gabrielle to wonder. What would have happened if they had taken the step to become closer sooner? What would have happened had they never met?
Either wonderment caused Gabrielle to shiver. Especially if they had never met. Would she have become a slave? Would she have taken a chance and run away and become the bard she had always craved to be?
Her musings were interrupted by their arrival at the temple. Xena had lit a candle for her brother. Eleven years was an extremely long time to remember and love someone.
Gabrielle did wish she had met Lyceus. He was a fighter, like his sister. But that was part of the problem. Xena continued to blame herself for insisting on fighting Cortese. For her brother's life to be cut short.
Would Xena ever see that Lyceus had choices. While it was the warrior princess who's voice had been stronger and louder, Lyceus had been able to make his own choices.
It was something Gabrielle hoped never to experience. Taking a life. Would it be graver if it were someone she loved or an innocent?
As it happened at that moment, a fight was breaking out. Someone wanted to destroy the temple belonging to The Fates. Both warrior princess and bard leapt into action.
As the fight continued, someone was coming at Xena. Gabrielle had no choice but to warn her. Yet, he was just a boy. It was too late. The warrior princess could not hold back her attack. Another innocent lost his life.
Gabrielle wanted to chase after her soulmate, but knew this was one of those moments when Xena would need to grieve. That she would turn to her bard when she was ready.
The life of a slave. Gabrielle had known nothing else. Not since that day in the woods. She and the other youngsters of the village had been sent on their usual chores, only to have Draco's men capture them.
From one master to another, Gabrielle had been sold to the highest bidder or given as a way to repay an old debt. It only seemed to become worse with each transaction.
Working for the trio, as Gabrielle referred to them, was the worst she had faced. Beatings for no reason. Rape. Anything to keep the people, not just slaves, doing as they wished.
As Gabrielle stumbled into the establishment to retrieve dinner, she felt something. If she hadn't been trained so, she would have scanned the room. There were scars upon scars on her body to keep her from disobeying or attempting to escape.
Gabrielle had been ready to accept whatever her keepers thought was fitting punishment. It was dangerous for an outsider to interfere. She made note of the woman. Why? She was uncertain.
When the stranger's significant other stepped in, it was clear. They were like all the others. The woman had only been interested in a house slave. While a house slave certainly was a more comfortable life with most, Gabrielle wanted her freedom. Any way she could obtain it.
It wasn't long until Gabrielle was invisible. It was the way she liked it. She could do things like have the dog lick a loaf of bread or spit in their wine.
It also meant Gabrielle was privy to conversations no one was supposed to be. She overheard certain names. Lyceus was one of those names she made certain to remember.
Barely even allowed to sleep, Gabrielle was expected to continue with her duties. It meant working in the kitchen. At least it kept her away from her owners. She wouldn't even think their names.
The stranger from the market approached her. Of course Gabrielle remembered her. The stranger was another in a long line who had attempted to purchase her.
Get her out of here. Didn't the stranger know what happened to slaves that escaped? The scar Gabrielle showed was just one of many.
Gabrielle took a step back. It wasn't from the sympathy she heard in the stranger's voice. It was because she knew her name.
Xena. That name was unfamiliar to Gabrielle. Yet, there was a pull when it came to the stranger. Someone only wanted to help her with no thought of gain. Impossible.
Lyceus? Now that was a name Gabrielle knew. This was his sister? The ones who had stood against Cortese? The ones her masters were afraid of?
How did Gabrielle know? Easy. She was like draperies to her owners. They didn't even think she could think for herself. All she was to them was money. To what she could do for them.
This Xena spoke as if she knew Gabrielle. No one knew her. Not since her family had been lost to her. Yet, Xena had a point. Gabrielle didn't have a chance to know herself. Could she be trusted?
It seemed Gabrielle was to find out as she wheeled the barrel toward the fire. She was stopped too far away from the fire. All she could do was wait to see how things played out.
Things happened so rapidly, yet Gabrielle managed to keep up. Was it out of instinct? It seemed natural to do as Xena commanded, even though there could be grave consequences.
Get ready to fly? It was an interesting sensation being sent into the air. Gabrielle's heart nearly caught in her throat as she soared through the air. How had Xena calculated it so perfectly that she and Gabrielle landed in the wagon filled with hay?
Being taken care of was something Gabrielle wasn't accustomed to, yet that's what Xena was doing. From allowing Gabrielle to bathe alone to wear her mother's clothing, it was unreal. It was like some dream Gabrielle had long ago given up dreaming.
Xena didn't want a slave? She wanted a best friend? Gabrielle found that hard to believe. There was one thing she'd learned. Never to trust a living soul.
Purest, kindest person? Full of wonder and stories? Someone who would never give up on anything or anyone? That was never how Gabrielle had been. And if she had, it had been killed the day she had been taken as a slave.
Gabrielle hated to interrupt, but she needed to know what was happening. It was too good to be true. Seeing the caring expressions in Lyceus and Xena's eyes was something she'd not seen since she was a child.
And just like that, it was over. Gabrielle's dream was transitioning into a nightmare. She, Xena and Lyceus were all taken prisoner. They were all in cages.
Listening to the siblings hurt Gabrielle. It wasn't merely their counterpoints. It was the fact they were alive and Lila was most likely dead. There was the fact Gabrielle had a taste of freedom. It had only lasted moments, but it was fresh in her mind.
Did Gabrielle hate Xena? In a way, she did. Yet, a taste of freedom was something she never thought she'd have. So there was a part of her that was grateful. Yet, mostly hated Xena.
Friend? Gabrielle could at least leave this world knowing she'd had one friend. All those friends that had come before her time as a slave had been forgotten long ago.
Free once again. But what now? As the man and Xena argued, Lyceus slipped away. Did Gabrielle join them? Or did she run as far away as she could? Why did mentioning of a wedding cause Gabrielle to feel a sharp pain?
Fighting. It was not something Gabrielle was accustomed to. She had lived in servitude her entire life. But there was her need for revenge. After watching the others fight, she saw her opportunity.
With one easy plunge of the sword, Gabrielle had her revenge. It would change everything. Somehow she knew that. Yet, it had felt amazing to inflict pain on the man who had tortured her for so long.
It was the oddest sensation. It was as if something had happened, but Gabrielle couldn't remember what it was. She could have sworn Xena had taken another life. But the boy was running scared.
Was it finding the Virlius token? Or was it something else that caused Xena to hug the bard? While affection was now more common in private between them, it wasn't out in the open. And especially not after a fight.
Xena was acting weird. Gabrielle hoped her soulmate would tell her what had happened. Something had. Until then, she would enjoy the little touches.
()()()()()()()()()()()()()
Traveling would be so different from now on. While Xena had always been protective of her bard, now she wanted her closer. After all, when was the last time she had offered her soulmate a ride?
Being rebuffed wasn't the end of the world. Xena understood Gabrielle was still recovering from her near death experience. Walking and feeling the earth beneath her was one way to do that.
Why did Xena have to say it was a family thing? Even before they had made love, it was crystal clear she and Gabrielle were family. They were soulmates.
Was it so when in public it would be easier to maintain the façade they were merely traveling companions? Or was Xena having trouble believing they were something more, even after their amazing physical connection.
There were times when Xena hadn't been able to honor her brother the way she was now. She hated herself for those times as her evil rein of terror had kept her from remembering the one person, besides her mother, to always believe in her.
A little bit of humor was used to deflect as Xena's emotions were overcoming her. The closer to the temple they came, the more they were boiling to the surface.
Once inside, Xena had difficulty asking The Fates to comfort her fallen brother. His life truly had been cut short. And she was the reason why it had been.
Gabrielle wishing she'd known Lyceus added to the heartbreak. And the blame. If Xena hadn't insisted they standup and fight Cortese, she would have her brother.
Even with Gabrielle insisting it wasn't Xena's fault, the warrior princess knew better. She had insisted. He had listened to her. And hopefully her bard would listen and never take a life, especially of the one she loved.
The sound of fighting interrupted their conversation. It wasn't long before Xena and Gabrielle were protecting the temple and the innocents worshiping there.
A warrior recognized her. Xena was now a target. He was a skilled warrior, but still dispatched. Was it recovering from the intense fight? Was it remembering Lyceus? Whatever it was, Xena's reaction time was slowed and a young innocent was dead.
Another innocent life taken at Xena's blade. She was tired of the death. She was tired of the fighting. If she could do it all over again, she would.
A wish was made. A wish was granted. Xena, at first, didn't understand what The Fates were speaking of. All was restored? Spill one drop of blood and all would be restored. Her head was spinning.
As Xena departed the temple, the first thing she thought of was Gabrielle. What had happened to her soulmate? Had she been injured? Was she tending to the injured?
The first thing Xena noticed was her clothing. No longer did she wear the leathers of a warrior. Instead, she was wearing the clothing of a villager.
Lyceus! Xena couldn't believe it. How in the known world was Lyceus alive? What was happening? Her head was still spinning from what The Fates had said.
As they made their way to the village, the women sang a familiar song. It was one sung at every harvest. It brought back so many memories.
When Lyceus asked why Xena stared, another memory hit her. She had brushed the dirt from his sarcophagus as she had said his face was always dirty.
The more Lyceus asked if she was all right, Xena was more and more uncertain. After all, where was Gabrielle? What about her mother? And Toris?
Distracted by the fact the Virillus token had saved Lyceus' life would forever be ingrained in Xena's mind. Yet, teasing him about wearing it helped her through as she was attempting to reconcile her memories with this new world she found herself in.
It was obvious Lyceus suspected something wasn't right with Xena. While she had come home and wanted to make better sense of the world she was in, she wasn't truly home without her bard.
Being greeted friendly like was still unusual in her home village. It was why Xena and her bard had only returned the one time so that Gabrielle could heal. It felt amazing to be greeted in a friendly manner.
Xena's old room at the inn. So many memories. Her jewelry. The dresses. The mirror. It was all too much to take in. Yet, her senses were as strong as ever. She knew someone was in the room with her.
Maphias? Xena hadn't thought of her ex fiancé in so many seasons. Why? There had been no spark between them. At least Petracles shared her thirst for power.
Moves? Maphias was lucky Xena hadn't drawn blood. No one, beside Gabrielle, was allowed to even think of taking such liberties. It didn't matter which timeline she was in.
Why wouldn't Maphias take the hint. There were valid reasons as to postponing the wedding. But they could have still married and done the things he had spoken of.
Because they had promised her mother. Instead of standing beside Lyceus' sarcophagus, it was her mother's. Xena hadn't been prepared for what changes could come with wishing not to have spilled blood.
Ten years? It couldn't have been that long. Lyceus responsible? How? Because of a broken heart. They had had to run. But it had left everything Cyrene had worked for defenseless. And losing Toris had not been easy. He wasn't dead, but had run off after feeling he was a coward.
Xena had to believe the world was a better place without the warrior princess having existed. Lyceus would have lived and Gabrielle would have never left her family.
After mourning her mother a little while longer, Xena made her way into the village. She wanted to see what it was like. If it was as she remembered it.
The fact there were warlords demanding something for nothing was not something that appealed to Xena. She couldn't help pulling the rug out from the scumbag.
The maiden appeared to her. Quick thinking. Yet, was it all Xena would resort to? What if it was someone she truly loved in danger? What then?
That's when Xena saw the most beautiful sight in the entire known world. There was a part of her that wanted to grab Gabrielle and make certain she was safe.
Xena had seen the expression in many eyes over the years. She had hoped never to see it in her soulmate's. Defeated. Pain. Agony. Gabrielle was not the same person in this time.
It was instinct protecting Gabrielle. Xena didn't even think how it could earn trouble for the both of them. Mathias stepping in and saying they were in the market for a house slave calmed the situation. But the emerald eyes were full of even more pain than before.
Mezentius? He was the one who owned Gabrielle? He had power? It was not something Xena liked one bit. She remembered her dealings with him in the other timeframe. And poor Marcus.
Xena nearly called out Gabrielle's name as she was taken away. Mathias and Lyceus were both worried about her? Didn't they know she could take care of herself? Of course, this timeframe was so different.
Once again, Xena nearly slipped in calling Gabrielle a friend. Why should it matter? Slavery was a crime. If the warrior princess had anything to say about it, she would end it immediately.
Words could change the world. Mathias was wrong. She'd seen Gabrielle do it many times. While what the mother fate said was true, blood could change things so could words.
Even using Gabrielle being a slave could not waver Xena from believing she could change things without spilling blood. All she had to do was free her soulmate.
Discovering when the delivery was to be made was nearly too easy. Xena had a plan. Now if only this Gabrielle would be willing to go along with it.
As Xena aided her brother in cleaning up the inn for the night, she made another new discovery. The amazons had been affected as well. Enslaved or dead. That's what had happened to them. And to the centaurs.
By the sounds, Lyceus regretted a lot of things. One of them was not fighting Cortese until they had driven him back. Surrendering had to be the hardest thing he had ever done.
While Xena would do anything to stop what was happening, this time around it had to be without blood. Once she spilled blood, things would return to the way they were.
The first part of the plan was easier than Xena thought. She was able to infiltrate the hideout by stowing away in the supply wagon. If her timing was right, it would be how they left the compound.
Gabrielle was nothing like the bard Xena knew. But who could blame her. If she had been a slave for as long as the warrior princess thought, it was surprising she wasn't more jaded to the world.
When Gabrielle revealed the punishment for attempting to escape, Xena nearly lost it. Someone had abused her soulmate. It took all her strength to maintain her plan.
Learning of the trio of warlords chilled Xena's blood. The fact Gabrielle didn't want to help showed how different she was. Or maybe she didn't realize who she truly was.
Finally revealing she was Lyceus' sister was the only way Xena could convince Gabrielle to even remotely listen. Thankfully, she went along with it.
Before Xena knew it, she was in flight. It was different than when she did her own flights of fancy. Timing was perfect as she landed next to her soulmate.
After their flight, it didn't take long to make it to the inn. Seeing the state of shock Gabrielle was in broke Xena's heart. At least she could give her soulmate her mother's old clothes. It was a start in making her realize this was for real.
And that Xena wasn't doing this because she wanted a slave. All she wanted, for now, was a friend. The memory of their lovemaking nearly caused the warrior princess to remain. But she would, for now, give Gabrielle her privacy.
The fact Mathias hadn't returned was weighing on Xena. She needed to calm Lyceus down or he might do something stupid. He truly was like she was, which was full of passion.
It showed when Lyceus explained his plan. A counterattack would not be anticipated. The fact Xena couldn't participate was baffling to her brother, understandably.
Gabrielle appearing was thankful for two reasons. One, it caused Lyceus to stop attempting to convince her she should attack. The other was because of how beautiful her soulmate was.
It was understandable, once again, that Lyceus would have a spark when it came to Gabrielle. If this time continued, he would have to learn Xena and Gabrielle were soulmates.
As it turned out, Gabrielle's words were prophetic. Because of Mathias, it was too good to be true. Because of him, Xena, Lyceus and Gabrielle were in cages.
Lyceus couldn't understand why Xena hadn't picked up the sword. She couldn't tempt fate, as it were. Would he ever understand?
Worse was the state her soulmate was in. Gabrielle was crushed. She didn't know whether to hate or thank Xena. After all, it had been the warrior princess who had given Gabrielle the first taste of freedom she'd had in so many seasons.
Hopefully Gabrielle believed one thing. Xena was sorry and that she truly was her friend. If this Gabrielle could only trust in that, it would make all the difference in the world.
The fact Mathias was helping them escape would never make up for turning them in. While his intentions had been honorable, it had placed Gabrielle and Lyceus in grave danger. How could he even mention a potential wedding?
Leave it to Lyceus to run off. It distracted Mathias so that Xena didn't need to answer. In this, or any lifetime, there would be no marriage between them.
Lyceus was already engaged in battle when Xena and the others arrived. Fighting without spilling blood was nearly impossible. Her brother couldn't understand why she held back.
It wasn't until Xena witnessed the most horrific thing ever. Gabrielle chose, very willingly, to take a life. Granted it had been a miserable life that had tortured her, but to see her soulmate shed blood was too much.
Xena had to say goodbye. Though she loved having her brother in her life, the fact so many others had been affected so horribly counted for everything.
While Gabrielle affected her the most, Xena couldn't help thinking of her mother. There was also the amazons and centaurs. How many others that she hadn't realized would be affected had been?
Destiny. Things happening for a reason. If Xena didn't have her dark side, she wouldn't be the person she was. She wouldn't have her bard by her side. And too many people would be affected.
At least The Fates allowed Xena to save the young boy's life. Now if only he did something positive with it. She couldn't help hugging her soulmate. Life without Gabrielle would be meaningless.
()()()()()()()()()()()()()
It wasn't a cave, but it was a clearing. One that offered shelter from the world. It was a good thing as the heavens threatened to open up. Already a shelter had been erected by the warrior princess.
Though the weather had been cooler as of late, tonight was unseasonably warm. It didn't make for snuggling, but bard and warrior princess remained snuggled.
"So you are telling me I was a slave." Xena merely nodded at the half statement, half question. "Lyecus was alive, but Cyrene wasn't."
"It was a different world. The amazons and centaurs were either dead or slaves." Xena was having difficulty believing she had had that much of an impact on lives.
After all, at one time Xena had attempted to kill all the centaurs. She had nearly taken out the entire northern tribe of amazons. Yet, her absence had caused them to become enslaved or to die?
"It was an extremely different world." Gabrielle felt the arms wrapped around her tighten. "What about me? I was a slave. But what was I like?"
"Gabrielle, this is difficult to talk about." Xena knew her soulmate deserved an answer. "I will say you'd lost hope. I attempted to return your belief in humanity. In the end, you did something I never want you to do."
Gabrielle managed to free herself enough to look into cobalt eyes. "You mean…?" Xena reluctantly nodded. "Is that why you chose to change your destiny?"
"That's the thing." Xena maintained the eye contact. "I think The Fates revealed what life would have been like for me so that I would know the impact I had on everyone."
Xena swallowed before continuing. "The past haunts me so at times that I forget that we fight for the greater good. And because I pick up a sword and you a staff, when your words don't work, we make a difference."
"In other words, you needed a reminder of the good in this world that we do together." Gabrielle understood. There were times when the things they did seemed not enough.
"I will say this." Xena kissed the top of her soulmate's head. "I hadn't realized how much Lyecus and I were alike. We were so close, yet I realize I didn't know him as well as I thought. We would have made an amazing team. And he would have been like what you are to me."
Gabrielle tilted her head. It took her a moment to realize what Xena was implying. "He would have kept you from being tempted by the darkside."
Xena nodded. "Had he survived the battle with Cortese, everything would have changed. But what would our lives have been like? Would I have been returning to Amphipolis and just happened upon a clearing to save a group of villagers?"
"I see where you are going with this." Gabrielle straddled her soulmate. "While there are so many paths both of us could have taken, we are on the one we are meant to be on. I just hope we continue together."
Once the words were spoken, both wondered what in the known world could cause bard and warrior princess to walk different paths?