Time to Party.
Tracey was waiting in Daphne's parlour, and hugged Daphne more forcefully than ever before.
"Bloody hell" said Tracey "Don't do that again. We all thought you'd died, then Nurmengard."
"I would not recommend it. One Star." said Daphne rather tiredly.
"I have sleekeezys, a little black market wrinkle lifter and something called a pushup-bra." said Tracey "How did you keep your hair bleached?"
"I did it after I got home and had a bath" said Daphne.
"Have you um, had any quality time with Harry?" asked Tracey, lifting a garment bag "A little something in vermilion silk, and shoes"
"I have the shoes I'll be using" said Daphne "I may need your help charming up my ankles"
"Those bloody awful things" said Tracey "Granger calls them stripper heels"
"I call them not looking short next to my husband" said Daphne, sweeping into her bedroom, followed by Tracey and floating accessories.
"They're ridiculous!" said Tracey.
"I like that he pays me attention when I wear them" said Daphne.
"The most powerful wizard in England and you've got him wrapped around your wardrobe" said Tracey.
"My handsome, brave, loving husband who even in a prison cell keeps me warm" said Daphne, taking off her dressing gown.
Tracey tilted her head "You bonded at Nurmengard."
"We had conjugal visits, then they put us in one cell" said Daphne "Bonding was all we could do."
"And you're not pregnant." said Tracey.
"As if" snorted Daphne "Harry was sterilised immediately after the quints were born" she sat down on the padded chair by the dresser and started carefully clipping her toenails.
"How did that work? Quints and no ballooning" asked Tracey, taking a brush and brushing Daphne's hair out.
"Family magic, Trace" said Daphne.
"Mighty useful family magic." said Tracey "I'd happily have a sprog if I didn't have to swell up like a pumpkin."
"There are … old spells for that" said Daphne "And you need a sperm donor."
"About that" said Tracey. "I'm dating."
"No!" said Daphne, and she stopped clipping her toenails.
"Don't sound so surprised. He's tall, artistic and likes quidditch" said Tracey.
"And his name?"
"Dean Thomas" said Tracey. "The Gryffindor everyone thought looked like a Shafiq."
"A muggleborm?" asked Daphne.
"His father was a wizard, his mother's a muggle. Daddy left one day during the first war and never came back. Fake name, of course."
"Halfblood then technically" said Daphne, switching to filing her toenails "Only problem with my tallest shoes is you need to have your toenails under control."
"Your're really wearing those absurd ones you got married in."
"It's Harry's birthday, he really likes them" said Daphne.
"He's always incoherent with lust when you wear them." said Tracey, opening a jar to expose green gel that sparkled.
Daphne started using a wooden pallette to apply the gel around her eyes "Thanks so much for this" she said. "I look like a hag."
"I heard you got scarred." said Tracey.
"I lost an arm and a leg" said Daphne "Got some scar reducer?"
Tracey opened a jar and looked at Daphne curiously "Where are the scars?"
"There's one in my hairline" said Daphne, dabbing green goo on her wrinkles.
Tracey soon spotted it and rubbed some into the pink scar.
"The rest are under my nightgown" said Daphne.
"Nothing everyone in dorms hasn't seen before" said Tracey, and Daphne put the green goo down and slipped out of her nightgown.
"You're emaciated" said Tracey. "And need to lose some hair. Your legs are a fright.
With that, Tracey drew her wand and cast some hairloss curses on Daphne, who waited for a moment then went and put some knickers and a bra on, and the bra was too big.
"I've lost a lot of weight" said Daphne, waving the loose front of the bra cups. "I must be back to a size six."
"A starved looking size four" said Tracey very bluntly "Fortunately, Andromeda told me you were looking starved, so I remembered to get some chicken fillets for your bra.
From her bag Tracey handed over some pink plastic bra fillers, that Daphne wriggled into her bra.
"I'll have to work on that" said Daphne distractedly sitting down and picking up some nail polish and her wand "I think red today" she said and started using her wand to paint her toenails.
Tracey graciously manicured Daphne's off hand while she did her toenails.
"Your rings?" asked Tracey.
"I don't know where they are" said Daphne, and she sighed.
Once Tracey had done Daphne's right hand fingernails, Daphne eyed her face in the mirror carefully.
"That goo seems to sort of work" said Daphne "Time for scar ointment."
Tracey helped with the scar around Daphne's regrown leg. The ointment shank the scars quite a lot.
"Not dark curse scarring" said Tracey cheerily "Two or three days of ointment and you'll be practically normal."
"You sound like your mum saying that. Thinking of training as a healer? " said Daphne "I'll have a scar forever."
"He's got scars on what both legs, and arms?" said Tracey "He won't mind. And no, I'm not training to be a grumpy cow who goes on and on."
"I think" said Daphne, rubbing a little more ointment into the scar around her right buttock "He loves me rather a lot."
"Last quints birthday, you two were positively sickening" said Tracey. "Smiling at each other."
"Last quints birthday I didn't have massive scars" said Daphne.
"Daphne, did he show any sign of groping you less?" asked Tracey.
Daphne blushed.
"Foundation for you, Madam" said Tracey, as Daphne kept rubbing ointment into her scars.
"Oh I'm hideous" moaned Daphne, pulling on her dressing gown and tying it tight.
Tracey boggled at result. "Daph, dear heart, look in your peer glass. Harry Potter would have to be a neuter to not want you."
"Those grew back" said Daphne thoughtfully "And work every bit as well as they ever did."
Tracey shook her head, hung up the garment bag and unzipped it, pulling out a vermilion silk dress.
"Oh Tracey" said Daphne "It's so nice."
"It's got a sizing charm from the seamstress still on it. Get in and it'll size to you." said Tracey, and Daphne discarded her dressing gown casually and picked up the dress and pulled it on, and using her wand pulled up the zipper in the back all the way to the top. The sleeveless dress shrank onto Daphne, straightening out and flattering her figure.
Daphne looked in the mirror "Hmm. Still going to need hair and makeup" she said.
"And some shoes and socks" said Tracey.
Daphne opened her sock drawer and rummaged around, pulling out some pale silky stockings and sat down to put them on, sliding them up "Cling tops Tracey" said Daphne "Less work, and who'd have thought muggles would invent a better sock."
Daphne padded over to her wardrobe and rummaged for a while, returning with a pair of white high-heels with thick soles that had to be eight inches tall.
"Colour charm these to suit Tracey, be a dear" said Daphne "You are so good at getting them to match"
Tracey concentrated and tapped the shoes with her wand, and they changed to match the dress. Daphne pulled the shoes on, and did up the straps, and stood unsteadily.
"Out of practice" said Daphne to herself. "Trace, help me with my ankles?"
Daphne sat and charmed one ankle while Tracey did the other.
Daphne stood up and swayed over to her peer glass and eyed herself "Hair, makeup and some jewellery, and I could face the world" said Daphne.
Daphne sat and stared applying foundation while Tracy picked up a string of small gems from Daphne's jewellery box and combed Daphne's hair and started weaving the string of gems in.
"Tracey, those are my wedding things" said Daphne.
"Well, wedding rings." said Tracey "Are in a box in the bottom of your sock drawer. Andromeda suggested it."
Daphne interrupted her hair-care to lunge toward her sock drawer, and find the box with her rings in it, and put them on her left hand. She looked at her hand and smiled, then the smile turned cold, and she grabbed her jewellery box and sat back, rummaging as Tracey wove in gems.
Daphne put a poison ring on her right hand, then one on her left, then more and more rings, till she was as be-ringed as any historic portrait.
Tracey spoke up "Daphne, the poison rings are a bit much."
Daphne leaned over and got the green anti-wrinkle goop and using the palette filled most of the poison rings with it. "For touch-ups." she said, and went back to applying foundation.
Tracey finished Daphne's hair, and was helping with eyebrow grooming as Daphne did some eyelash charms, and applied some barely visible lipstick. Daphne pursed her lips, blotted and smiled "Now I can face the world."
"Necklace" said Tracey.
Daphne rummaged in her jewellery box and found a small golden heart, on a light chain. She put the locket on and smiled to her reflection.
"The necklace your mum gave you when you were ten?" asked Tracey "Not something Harry gave you?"
"Mummy will see it" said Daphne "And Harry hasn't given me any necklaces specifically, only all the black's collection, and all I have at home is the black pearls."
Tracey reached into the jewellery box and dragged out the huge string of gigantic black pearls
"Mrs Black wears black pearls" said Tracey "It only clashes with the necklace, and that's for your mum."
Daphne got out the huge black earrings and Tracey had to painfully charm some new piercings for her.
Daphne looked in the mirror "I'm dressed" she said.
"Perfume" said Tracey.
"Forgot" said Daphne, and she eyed the dresser, and stood up "Now, Harry may never know" said Daphne, and she went into the ensuite and put some Boots basics sunscreen on over her makeup, and put some on her arms, and then took a bottle purporting to be deep conditioner, unscrewed the top, and pulled out a tall, thin perfume bottle and sprayed some on her pulse points, and hid it again.
Tracey frowned "Sunscreen and what?"
"A jasmine perfume I bought in Hong Kong when we were fourteen" said Daphne.
"Surely he could work out it's Jasmine" said Tracey "He's not totally stupid."
Daphne lifted her hand "Sniff" she said and Tracey sniffed Daphne's wrist. "The sunscreen's scented?"
"A little bit, and reacts oddly with the jasmine" said Daphne "Harry's convinced it's a terribly exotic secret."
"About that, what the hell is his cologne?" asked Tracey. "The story going around is that it's a special scent from Archers and Javelins?"
"Custom for Harry" said Daphne "It's in the cupboard here… which reminds me."
Daphne picked up her wand and with a tiny circle and stab, "Expecto Patronum!" a silvery mist shot from Daphne's wand, slowly solidifying into a silvery cat.
"Go to Harry Black and say 'Come and get dressed up and put some cologne on" said Daphne and the cat nodded and bolted through the wall.
"You can cast a corporal Patronus?" asked Tracey "And it's not a female deer to go with his?"
"Fortunately not" said Daphne "His Mother's was a female deer. And so was Professor Snape's"
"How do you know that?" asked Tracey.
"Pillow talk" said Daphne, lifting her eyebrows.
A little later, the bedroom door opened and Harry came in. Daphne stood up and turned "What do you think?" she asked.
Harry, still in his dressing gown stared. He blinked. "Tracey, leave the room" he said.
Tracey left, giving Daphne an smug smile.
Once the door shut, Harry said "Darling, you didn't need to get all dressed up."
"But I didn't have time to get you a present, so all I have is this dress Tracey got me." said Daphne. "And don't rip it," she added.
Harry started undoing his dressing gown.
"And don't vanish it either!" said Daphne, picking up her wand and casting a switching spell.
"Hmm?" asked Harry, his pyjamas tented.
"No knickers" said Daphne and Harry groaned.
"For decency's sake put some on" said Harry "You'll wet the dress if I keep stroking your upper arm all day."
Daphne's upper arms raised in goose-pimples. "Cheat" said Daphne, but she opened her underwear drawer and rummaged, settling on a tiny thong, which she waved at Harry "Think that'll do?"
"Get the dress off, you minx" said Harry, discarding is pyjama pants.
"You only have till one to be dressed and you WILL be wearing cologne" said Daphne, from the chair, pulling the thong up over her shoes, then wriggling it up her legs.
"I'm having a really good birthday present after the party's over" said Harry, pulling on some pants.
"You'll get everything" said Daphne "I'm sure with wands we can celebrate particularly energetically tonight."
"Oh, like that" said Harry.
"It is your birthday" said Daphne.
"I am feeling very tense" said Harry.
Daphne sighed dramatically and unzipped her dress, sliding it off and putting it on the bed.
Harry took his pants off and Daphne swaggered over to the wardrobe door and leaned forward, bracing herself on the door and sticking her arse out.
Fourteen minutes later Daphne was sitting, legs around Harry's waist on Harry's lap on top of the dresser chair. Harry was holding Daphne by the bum, and she had her hands knotted in his hair.
"You better not have messed up my makeup" said Daphne, with a soft smile.
"I expect not" said Harry.
Daphne spent a little time redoing her makeup and hair, and Harry had a quick shower and dressed in trousers, a t-shirt that read 'I defeated the Dark lord and all I got was this lousy T-shirt' and sensible shoes.
"That T-shirt's loose" said Daphne "it used to be nice and tight."
"I've got thin" said Harry.
"Please put on a shirt?" asked Daphne.
Harry put on a black shirt and a Slytherin tie, and slid on a tweed coat.
"Honestly, Tweeds with that?" said Daphne "At least a suit coat?"
Harry rummaged and put on the coat from Regulus's old suit, then found a red and gold handkerchief, and clumsily folded a pocket square, and put it in his coat pocket.
Daphne sighed and tidied up the pocket square.
She looked up from Harry's coat pocket and Harry was gazing at her "Love you" he said.
"Obviously, we have seven children" said Daphne. "Don't kiss me again, I need to fix my makeup."
"Go on… tell me how much you love me?" asked Harry.
"I love you more than life itself" said Daphne utterly neutrally "You are the best thing that ever happened to me. Well, excluding the first time we made love. That was ridiculously terrible, and the incident of the trip to the seaside will not be repeated."
Harry blinked, his eyes glistening "You're making me cry, Mrs Black" said Harry "Later tonight
I'll return the favour."
"I'm not into that" said Daphne.
"I meant" said Harry firmly "A declaration of love so moving you cry."
"Oh thank goodness" said Daphne "I thought you meant some S&M."
Harry rolled his eyes "And why would I bother doing that? You'd only complain."
"I might dress up" said Daphne. "Something sexy?"
"You're already dressed in something sexy" said Harry.
"A Naughty Auror costume?" asked Daphne. "Slutty Hogwarts schoolgirl?"
"Oh!" said Harry "We never did go to Hogwarts… slutty Slytherin schoolgirl, a broom closet?"
"An abandoned classroom and a teachers' desk" corrected Daphne. "A few cushioning charms… and thou."
"Crikey" said Harry "We've been married eight years and you still surprise me."
"I think we'll actually stay home and snuggle in our huge soft bed" said Daphne. "In comfy flannel pyjamas"
"Flannel pyjamas?" asked Harry "I liked the sound of Slutty Slytherin schoolgirl"
Daphne smiled "You're terrible" she said.
"You're the one wearing eight-inch stripper heels" said Harry.
"I'm not the one that needs to rearrange his pants" said Daphne.
-==0==-
Mr and Mrs Black, and their children entered the kitchen, which was packed with people
"Harry!" someone shouted, and Hermione climbed onto a tall kitchen stool.
"Now everyone" said Hermione "I'm going to cast a fidelious charm protecting a secret. Then I'm going to tell you something. Please do not be alarmed."
With that, Hermione started casting a charm, to finish with an upward jab of her wand.
The Potter-Black children started crying immediately.
"The Secret I am telling you" said Hermione quite loudly "Is that Harry and Daphne have escaped Nurmengard and are hiding here at home."
The Potter children all gasped, shrieked and clung to their parents, crying.
Daphne patted children on the head, and bent at the knees to speak softly to her toddlers.
Harry bent at the knees too and hugged and kissed children, and maybe one of his hands stroked over his wife's bum. Everyone would have ignored that anyway as it was his birthday.
After the cake with so many candles it was a huge fire hazard was blown out, and everyone given a slice, Harry, one arm wrapped around Daphne was chatting to his mother and father-in-law.
"Cyrus" said Harry.
"You're a bad influence" said Cyrus "My daughter in Nurmengard."
"It's half a mistake, half an attempt to borrow family artefacts" said Harry "We will work something out. Daphne's a great negotiator."
"And nobody at this party will leak your location" asked Roxanne, curiously. "Seems rather trusting."
"That's a fidelious charm. You literally can't tell anyone else." said Harry "Hermione could, in theory, but as my best friend… she won't."
"I've never heard of that" said Cyrus.
"It's an obscure charm" said Harry "My parents died from trusting the wrong person with their secret. Chosen well, it's an almost perfect protection."
"Almost perfect" asked Roxanne.
"We can hardly go shopping in Diagon Alley" suggested Daphne.
"Daphne dear" said Roxanne, "can we chat, privately."
Daphne and Roxanne left for the snug.
"What's going on" asked Harry.
"I have no idea. You look half-starved." said Cyrus, "eat up, and Daphne's looking a bit peaky."
"She's half starved and better dressed" said Harry, taking a pie from a floating plate of pies, and biting into it, closing his eyes. "Oh Jimmy" murmured Harry "You're so worth it."
"Are those good?" asked Cyrus "They look a bit messy, is all"
"Jimmy's our chef" said Harry, taking another bite of pie "His pies are very good indeed."
Cyrus cautiously bit into one, holding it over a plate. "Better than the pies at the Ministry" he said cautiously.
"Come over for dinner this week" said Harry "We enjoyed meeting great-grandmother Bathory at Nurmengard. Daphne explained what a character she is."
Cyrus took a large bite from his pie "She's a hideous bigot, is what she is" said Cyrus.
"Daphne did mention that bit, yes" said Harry "She invited us to bring the children to her schloss. Is she a masochist, do you think?"
"Those are my grandchildren, Potter-Black" said Cyrus, and he paused "I think she's gone gaga personally."
"Her husband, whassisname, said the old girl was a bit exercised. She chewed out the warden." said Harry, dashing to the buffet and rescuing a crumbed wheel on a stick.
"What's this, do you think?" asked Harry.
"Looks" said Cyrus, still working on his pie, which had decorated his goatee with crumbs "Like a crumbed cheese on a stick. Quidditch specialities."
"Hopefully I can get Daphne to have a few, she's skin and bone" said Harry, who spotted his wife exiting the snug with her mother, and coming back to the party, to whisper in a waiting Tracey's ear. Tracey blushed and covered her mouth with her hand, nodded and then asked a few questions. Daphne finished, and headed straight for Harry, wrapping an arm around his waist and taking the cheese on a stick from his hand and biting into it…. To obvious delight.
"Camembert on a stick" said Daphne, "Mmm."
Harry was distractedly watching his wife's lips eating melty cheese for a while, when Cyrus asked "So you two getting on well?"
Harry replied with "I love your daughter more than life itself, she is the greatest thing to ever happen to me" and kissed Daphne's hair.
Daphne smirked and bit into the crumbed molten Camembert on a stick.
Cyrus blinked "You bonded" he said weakly.
"Nothing to do but bond at Nurmengard" said Harry "We had a shared cell, thank Merlin. Too cold otherwise."
"Harry" said Daphne firmly "Get eating, you're very thin."
Harry let her go, and went and got two cheese on a stick from the platter, and came back in time to hear Cyrus saying "…. not mind-tortured or something?"
and Daphne replying "Father, I love Harry. I have loved Harry for some time. We might have had to spend months in a prison cell to realise how good life was before the accident, but we are just in love."
"It's my birthday" said Harry "Have a cheese on a stick" Harry handed Daphne another, and bit into his own.
"I've already had one" said Daphne.
"You're too thin, eat up" said Harry.
While Harry might have talked a big game about the nights activities, all the children piled into bed with their parents, who were wearing flannel pyjamas. Harry read a bedtime story to his children, who then insisted that mummy had to read a story too.
Harry went to sleep surrounded by family, with a broad smile on his face.
-==0==-
Harry went out to the kitchen to hear someone in the ballroom.
"Now Daphne, we're going to start on light weights, lots of reps, and a carefully calculated meal plan." said the witch.
Harry peeked in the door, and Millicent Bulstrode was setting up weights and charts on a table in the ballroom while Daphne read something.
"Millie" said Daphne "The diet plan says eat as much as possible, mostly meat and cheese?"
"We're trying to put muscle back Daphne dear" said Millicent "Being starved is bad for a girl."
"I need to get my bust back" said Daphne "I have … padding in my smallest bras."
"So Potter can ogle it?" asked Millicent.
"So my husband can have the full Daphne Greengrass experience" said Daphne. "I'm flat-chested, stringy and poor Harry had to pretend to be turned on yesterday. For his birthday. We only did it twice."
"Twice?" said Millicent hollowly.
"It was little better than in Nurmengard." said Daphne "At least we weren't cold or hungry."
"Potter does you twice a night?" asked Millicent.
"I used to get three before breakfast" said Daphne morosely. "Now my night-gown doesn't get him hard."
"You're both sex mad" said Millicent grimly.
"We had a difficult start to our marriage" said Daphne. "Sex was something we bonded over."
"You spent your hens night wailing and crying about how your life was ruined." said Millicent.
"I was a silly little girl" said Daphne "Harry's capable of things… fantastic things."
"I'm going to be ill" said Millicent lightly, in what Harry assumed was a joking tone.
"He's given me seven marvellous children" said Daphne.
"Did the prison affect your mind?" asked Millicent "marvellous children? The twins are monsters and the quints will probably destroy Hogwarts."
"Altair is a good boy" said Daphne, strongly.
"Well I didn't want to say it but Caph's like… baby you on a sugar high and some experimental potion. She's absolutely ruthless." said Millicent.
"I am concerned about her dating chances as a young woman" said Daphne "Where will we find someone that's not a cringing weakling compared to her father?"
"Azkaban, in the serial killer wing" said Millicent blandly.
"Millie!" protested Daphne.
"Harry, stop eavesdropping" said Daphne.
Harry stepped in "I was out of sight" he protested.
"I smelt your cologne." said Daphne.
Harry, take your shirt off… Millie's going to help me get some muscle back, and you're just as starved as me."
Harry reluctantly removed his shirt, exposing his black "I defeated a dark lord" shirt, then even more reluctantly puling that off.
"I see no difference" said Millicent.
"He was fourteen!" said Daphne "He got a lot bigger." Daphne smirked "A lot bigger." she added.
"I have lost a lot of weight" admitted Harry "I can't lift Daphne."
"Okay, less gross stuff" said Millicent "what are those scars on your forearms?"
"Where my arms were blown off." said Harry "My legs went too."
"So your upper arms are wasted from before, but your forearms are only growing back. You probably need to do wrist exercises. Start with one pound bars." said Millicent, and handed Harry some lumps.
"Now, turn them like you were going to cast something round." said Millicent.
Harry did, stopping quite quickly. "I'm sore" he admitted.
"Put your shirt on" said Millicent "You two could do with potions for this."
"What kind of thing?" asked Daphne.
"Some people use weight gain potions for working out" said Millicent "They're a little addictive. Again, lots of meat and exercise. Someone really good could make you some potions."
"I can think of someone" said Harry blandly.
"Granger?" asked Millicent "I suppose."