TW: Panic/anxiety attack.

(:)

It hadn't taken as long as Leonardo suspected it would to prepare his brothers and their counterparts for the venture into his mind. Leonardo had them practice a few meditation tactics, which they thankfully caught on quickly enough to, and then taught them a chant they could use to pull themselves to his mind.

Now, in the abyss of his head, Leonardo waited for them.

Well, it wasn't so much of a void as it was a garden. Above him, blossoming trees flourished, the pink sakura tinting the hue of the sunlight. Piles of freshly fallen petals surrounded him, a couple landing in the stream before him. A couple lily pads and lotus blossoms drifted in the waters, and on the other side of the water were a few bare rocks for his wayward visitors. It took a bit of work, a lot of practice, and as much training as he could glean off of his late father to figure out how to change his spiritual landscape from the nullifying grey to the peaceful xanadu it was now.

Michelangelo arrived first. That didn't surprise Leonardo; ever since the Newt-Ralizer attacked, he had been, as studiously as Michelangelo could, training under Leonardo. After all, if they ever lost Michelangelo again, at least there was a chance that they, or at least Leonardo, could still talk to him.

"Hey, Mikey." Leonardo greeted his little brother as he faded into existence. Michelangelo startled at his voice, blinking at him like he had just been awakened from a deep trance. And, Leonardo supposed, he had been. Leonardo offered him an affectionate smile regardless.

"Duuude…" Michelangelo appraised, twisting his head around to take in his surroundings in awe. "This is your place? It's so sweet, yo!"

"Now you know what I do when I meditate. Not so boring, is it?"

"Interior decoration? Naw, it still sounds plenty boring. But it looks good!"

"Exterior." Leonardo sighed, less amused by Michelangelo's antics now that it was used against him. Well, at least now he could show off his 'rad skills'. He imagined a lotus appearing in his palms. A seed landed in his palm, and the flower blossomed rapidly, petals pouring out over his fingertips. "But I've learned to do plenty."

"Aw, now you're just showing off." Michelangelo pouted, ignoring Leonardo's beam of pride as he leaned over the stream and held out his hands eagerly. Leonardo laughed, plopping the flower into his baby brother's awaiting palms. "Aw," Michelangelo cooed, "it feels so silky!"

It took a little while for anyone else to arrive.

To Leonardo's utmost surprise, it wasn't Raphael who appeared next, but Mikey. Hardly a second later, Raph also phased into being. Both boys looked around before spotting one another at the same moment.

"You!" Raph and Mikey choroused as one, startling Michelangelo who hadn't noticed them pop in. "I told you I'd get here first! Nope, sorry, I totally got here first! Nuh-uh! Stop it! It was me!"

Leonardo felt a smile creep onto his face, and he shared a mirth-filled look with Michelangelo. It felt like a lifetime ago since Leonardo and Raphael had such an argument, though it still wasn't a rare pastime for Raphael and Michelangelo to get into a squabble. Their counterparts were parallelling it clearly at this moment. Actually, now that Leonardo thought about it, Raphael also argued with Donatello in a similar fashion. Wow, his warmest colored brother certainly did have anger issues, huh?

"Hello, welcome in." Leonardo finally greeted, doing his best to wipe all humor from his face, but allowed the fondness to stay. "I trust you found your way here easily?" He teased.

"Yup," Mikey joked right back, "we just turned left at the house with the red door, exactly as you said. And, boom! Here we are!"

"Aw, but really, though, it didn't seem like there was really findin'." Raph admitted, rubbing the back of his head. "We just said that chant you told us to, meditated for a while, and boom! Here we are."

"That's great." Leonardo smiled, forever grateful that the scrolls had worked. "Now we just need-"

Raphael fizzled into being, hand forming angry fists on his knees. His brow was clenched, doing his best to concentrate. It wasn't the traditional way of meditation that Leonardo was used to, nor did it look too particularly relaxing, but… Hey, as long as he was here!

"Welcome in, Raph." Leonardo greeted, holding back a laugh as Raphael startled with bewilderment, keeping his head on a swivel.

Raphael blinked at Leonardo, then at Raph and Mikey, huffing to himself. "Seriously? How was I the last one here?!"

"It's alright, Raph. I'm just glad you all made it. You made good time, too, everyone. I thought I'd be waiting at least an hour!"

Raph didn't look like he quite knew what to do with the praise, a fact that Leonardo already felt like he had to remedy, but fortunately Mikey did.

"Didja hear that, Raph?" Mikey beamed, looking to be close to bursting, leaning over to wrap his arms around his biggest brother's arm. "Leo's proud of us!"

Raph stared at Mikey. "Um. Yeah? I mean, yeah! Yeah. Uh."

"You smell confused."

"Wha-?! No! No, I don't! Raph smells like a lot of things!"

"Hey!" Raphael snarled, perking up indignantly.

"Oops, sorry, not you, little man. I mean-! Slightly. Slightly-smaller-than-me-man. Big man. Turtle. Big turtle. Angry Raph. You smell fine. I was talking about this Raph." Raph jerked a thumb at himself, smiling a tad nervously. "And this Raph smells like a lot of things! And confusion ain't one of them." He paused briefly, thinking. "And neither is sewer-stink. Right now I smell like… like…"

"Lotus!" Mikey exploded, releasing Raph's arm to point at the flower Michelangelo held, no longer listening to Raph's existential crisis. "Ohmegosh! Ohmegosh! That's so pretty! Where'd you-?! Wow, everything's pretty! This is your mind?! Really?!"

Leonardo nodded, preening the slightest bit under the praise. At least one Michael was pleased. "It is."

"Aw, it's so zen!"

"Who knew Leo liked pink?" Raph murmured quietly, scooping up a handful of fallen petals. "Oh, they feel plush!"

"Thank you. They remind me of Japan." Leonardo beamed, channeling a beam to shove a faceful of petals into Raphael's face. "Oops."

As Raphael spluttered and sneezed, trying to get the petals away from his face so he could breathe, Raph turned his full attention to Leo. "You've been to Japan?" He sounded slightly jealous, Leonardo noted.

"Yes, I have!" Leonardo perked up, allowing the petals to stop tormenting Raph. "I was there around twenty-two years ago."

"You didn't." Raphael balked, catching on instantly to Leonardo's joke.

"Boo, bad time joke!" Michelangelo complained, flashing a thumbs down towards Leonardo.

"Unfortunately, Leonardo continued, thriving in his brother's growing disdain and their counterparts' confusion, "at the time, these blossoms weren't in season."

"You've been waiting to use that one!" Raphael facepalmed.

"Wait, how old are you?" Raph asked, ticking off on his fingers. "Twenty-two years ago-"

"Oh, no, no! We're not that old." Michelangelo reassured. "But we have time-traveled, and… man, I told you they were bad, little-Mikey! This is why you're supposed to leave the jokes to me! Leo, materialize a spoon for me to throw at your head."

"No!" Leonardo commanded, even as he accidentally summoned the spoon. "You are banned from throwing spoons at me after the last time, remember?"

"Oh. Yeah." Michelangelo pouted, slowly lowering the spoon. "But this time there's no toasters for you to accidentally dodge into this time, so you're safe!" The spoon vanished from his hand regardless. "Aw, man…"

"We're getting off topic." Leonardo sighed, leaning down to massage his temples. "Anyway, good job on your time tables, again." He glanced up, giving them a small encouraging smile once more. "Now, I want to know exactly what we're working with. Big-Raph and Little-Mikey, are you able to activate your powers?"

Mikey whipped out his nunchucks, flaring them out. They swung on either side of Leonardo, fluffing out his mask tails in the wind. The chains ignited with fire, and with a quick tug, the trees they had tangled up were launched over Leonardo's head. He ducked right before they took off his head, wincing.

He glanced up in time to see Raph catch them with two glowing red fists three times the size of his regular hands.

"Sorry!" Mikey squawked atLeonardo and his brothers, the other two having withdrawn his head into their shells. "I didn't mean to-!"

"Not exactly what I meant for you to do," Leonardo hummed, "but! It's good to know you can still manipulate mental objects." Leonardo rubbed his neck awkwardly as Raphael and Michelangelo shly poked their heads out of their shells. "I didn't know you could change size."

"Oh, uh, yeah! I guess I didn't really use it in the sewers. It's easy for Donnie and I to squish people with our full powers! So, uh… we don't unless we wanna squish them! Well, I guess Donnie always does want to, but he's sorta banned." Raph smiled enthusiastically, a bead of stress dribbling off his forehead as he placed his hands on his hips. "Y'know… Donnie things."

"What." Raphael scowled. "That's nothing like Donnie!"

"Your Donnie's a murder machine!" Michelangelo balked. "Uh, no offense!"

"He would take no offense!" Mikey cried desperately. "I think he wants to be like that! Save us!" He tossed himself at Michelangelo, earning himself a bear hug from his counterpart and a quick pat on the head.

"Okay, so you can clone yourself and become larger… can your clones also get larger, or are they stuck the same size?"

"Hmm…" Raph patted his chin, thinking. "I mean… I feel like big me is more of a clone, too? Just a clone I form around me, I guess. But I can only really do one of him, that I can tell. I guess it's sorta like a silverfish! There can be a lot of small ones, but they combine to make one real big one!"

"Like… from minecraft?" Michelangelo screwed his eyes into a squint, frowning.

"Yeah! Donnie says they're real creatures, though." Mikey enthused, perking up to stare up at Michelangelo's chin. Michelangelo quickly looked down to look him in the eye, enthusiastically patting him again. "Hugsss!"

"And Mikey, what do all of your powers entail?" Leonardo inquired.

"Oh!" Mikey perked up, but didn't untangle himself from Michelangelo's arms. Michelangelo didn't look like he minded too particularly much, but Leonardo wondered if he still wasn't hugging Michelangelo enough. He'd have to ask Michelangelo later.

"My nunchucks chains can extend like suuuper long, and they can also catch on fire!" Mikey tossed one arm out in excited exclamation, and then tucked it right back in, beaming. "I also got super strength with my other weapon, but I dunno if I can get it with this one? I'd have to test it! Raph, we gotta go by the docks and test it!"

Leonardo nodded slowly while Raph tried to sooth Mikey's excitement, filing 'old weapon' away as a conversation topic for a later time. "And Leon?"

"Teleportation and portals. Teleportation, as far as we can tell, is only really between swords or to swords, and portals only work when he has both swords." Raph paused for a moment, thinking. "He can only really teleport one person at a time, too, but portals transport everyone. He prefers using teleportation, though. I think it takes less energy…?"

"Hmm, so while he's sleep deprived…"

"Oh!" Raph perked up. "No portals to avoid hurting himself! You're pretty alright, other-Leo!"

"Thanks." Leonardo tilted his head, thinking for a moment. "Okay, that should be all I need to know… I think we're ready to take down Shredder."

Raph cracked a tired grin, holding out an arm as Mikey peeled away from Michelangelo to hurl himself at Raph. "You… mean kill Shredder."

"I mean banish his soul, permanently."

"That's killing!"

"It's." Leonardo pinched the bridge of his nose. "Look. We discussed this. You even agreed! 'Killing' is the only way to get Shredder out! I know it's not very honorable, but this is all we have! We either end this now… or you lose your brother. And who knows what Shredder will do next."

"I know!" Raph snapped. "We already know what you're planning to do! Just. Don't try to make it better by hiding stuff from us. Our dad did it enough, and now Leo's…" Raph pinched the bridge of his nose. "I'm sick of this family lying. Of hiding the truth. Don't you do it, too…"

"Okay." Leonardo conceded, bowing his head respectfully. "I won't."

"Thanks." Raph dropped his free hand into his lap, still clinging onto a whimpering Mikey with his other. "For all you've done already. It… means a lot."

(:)

Leon remained seated outside the lab long after he had been kicked out, busy playing games on his phone. He had only left once to grab a kumquat from the candle room, just in case he felt Shredder start to wiggle again. He had passed through his meditating brothers and their counterparts on his way, and despite his envy, he couldn't help but marvel at just how calm they had all looked, practically dead to the world.

He hadn't even really thought about how frail and helpless they had looked! …well, okay, maybe he had, sue him, but not in a murderous way! Character development, baby!

He had his suspicions that Shred-Two wouldn't share his glee at that revelation, but it didn't matter what that stick in the mud cared about. Soon, he'd be free of his demon tag-along!

Leon glanced up as Donnie shoved his way out of the lab, letting the tarp covering the entrance fall still behind him. He paused right at the doorway, turning to stare at Leon. Leon put down his phone.

"Salutations." Donnie greeted, watching Leon like he was an enigma.

"Hey." Leon nodded, scooting over to the side so Donnie could either settle down if he wanted or more easily pass Leon. "And where's Dee-Two?"

"Conversing with his, he said and I quote, 'girlfriend'." Donnie sat down next to Leon, folding his arms over his knees. "I figured it'd be apt to give them privacy, despite my own curiosity."

"Woah, girlfriend? Nice!"

"It's April."

"…what."

"I know."

"She's not your type!

"I know."

"You like red-heads!"

"I know. As much as it pains me to admit, I'm as frustratingly clueless as you." Donnie shrugged, sparing an unsubtle glance at Leon. "I suppose I neglected to ask, partly because we were among additional company, but how are you?"

"Uh, I think you all asked earlier." At Donnie's confused look, Leon elaborated. "In the candle room. Before my naptime." Leon grinned and gave himself a mental pat on the back as Donnie snorted in amusement. "But uh… I'm doing better now. More rested! Now, I'm not completely back to my totally amazing handsome self, but I will be!"

"Oh, yes." Donnie deadpanned. "I suppose I'll have to be more specific. How are you doing with this whole… 'Leader' situation? You haven't been calm enough to comfortably answer since it happened. So, it's about time one of us properly asked to-"

Raph hated him.

It was the first thought that entered Leon's mind, and it just. Wouldn't. Leave. Raph had acted so scared around Leon. Brothers didn't act like that around other brothers. Were they even brothers? Leon had messed up too often. He got Gram-Gram killed. Raph had hugged Mikey like Leon would steal him, and Leon hadn't meant to, he hadn't, he hadn't!

But Raph loved him! Raph had sat in place for seven hours, hugging Leon, rocking Leon, protecting Leon while he slept. Wasn't that enough? It was proof, so why did it feel-

Why did it feel like-

"Nardo?"

Shell, shell, his vision was darkening. A panic attack? Probably, he couldn't quite see. Tears were welling up in his eyes, but Leon didn't… he didn't really feel upset? There was nothing but a vague panic, a gentle pulsing, maybe acceptance. He didn't know. He just had to… to breathe? Right, right. Ground himself. He could do that. Grab his arms, feel the ground… Why wasn't it working? He was doing everything right, wasn't he?

"Leo!"

Right, Donnie was talking to him. Was this as upsetting to watch as it was to experience? He was probably worrying Donnie. Maybe? It was hard to tell sometimes. What was he supposed to be doing? Right, breathing.

"...do you need water? Leo?"

A nod. Footsteps retreating rapidly.

Breathe. In and out. In for… how long? Leon had never really paid attention. In for five, maybe? Out for eight? That sounded right, it sounded-

Heh, that was actually kinda funny. Leon always thought panic attacks were more… panicky. But here he was, able to know what to do, and yet nothing was working! His mind was sharp, clear, yet he never felt so helpless.

Donnie was coming back. Leon could vaguely hear his feet, and could just make out his feet through the haze. Donnie had barely left, but already was holding a cup in his hand. He extended it gingerly, holding it below Leon's mouth, helping control it as Leon grabbed onto it and lifted it to drink.

A feeling of indignant pride stirred in Leon, shoving aside a tiny bit of the mess of blurry thoughts. He could still drink by himself! He wasn't so far gone that he couldn't! He just… just couldn't see well! Come, now, he just had to breathe, and everything would be fine!

Huh, his ears had been ringing for a while. He couldn't really hear what Donnie was saying anymore. When did that happen?

The water felt good, at least. The cool liquid calmed his mind, slowly making the dark creep away. Some darkness remained, but the ringing just about vanished. Leon breathed deeply.

"Leo?" Donnie quietly whispered. Distantly, Leon noticed his brother's goggles were still cast in the dark edging his vision. "Are you okay? Er. Are you operational?"

"All systems 'go'..." Leon joked, squeezing his eyes shut and leaning away. "Sorry. I know you wouldn't… you shouldn't have asked. If you knew I'd… I'd break, you wouldn't have…"

"No, I was expecting something like this. However, I wasn't expecting it to be quite so instantaneous, or for it to last for so little time. You continue to exceed expectations." Donnie watched Leon carefully, keeping a firm hand on Leon's shoulder. "...I'll go ahead and file your reaction under 'not doing well'."

"I dunno." Leon whispered, hugging his arms. "I just… it was all any of us ever wanted, y'know? A chance to boss around the others…! And no repercussions? Shell, yeah!" Leon crumpled. "I… I just… Raph just…! I think-I think he must! He must…"

Donnie grabbed Leon's hands before he could thrust the heels of his palms into his eyes, pulling them swiftly away. "Breathe, Nardo!"

"I am!"

"No, you're communicating. Shut up, and just… breathe, okay?"

Each shaky breath Leon took made Donnie's fingers loosen. It took too long - five in, eight out, right? Right? - before Donnie's hands fell away and Leon was breathing steadily again. Don't think about it, Leon reminded himself, but he couldn't heed his own advice. How could he, when Raph's pain-filled eyes played on loop in his head?"

"...Raph was… Raph was angry!" He informed Donnie, feeling rather pathetic. "He just… I ruined it for him! He was so good, so good at being the leader! He led like a… like a boss! Heh… But he didn't… Feel like a… y'know… boss. He was still… still our big…!"

"I know." Donnie nodded in an uncharacteristically sympathetic way.

"I think he… gosh, I hardly remember it. I was too angry, I thought he was still hiding Shredder from me! But now I think he… he might've…? Maybe…?"

"You're not articulating. You're not remembering to breathe." Donnie criticized, crossing his arms.

Leon struggled for breath for a moment, turning to regard his toes. "...I think Raph… tried to apologize? But I can't really remember…? He was so angry!"

"I think he was more of… scared." Donnie corrected with a huff. "Honestly, you two are more alike than either of you realize."

"What…? How do you… figure?"

"Sweet blueberry pancakes… must I walk you through everything?" Donnie ran a hand down his face in a way that Leon knew he didn't actually mind Leon's obliviousness. "You're scared of Raph being angry. Raph is scared that you'll rub it in your face. Capiche?"

Oh. Leon sucked that much, huh?

"Now, I know you wouldn't. And I'm sure Raph is logically aware of it… but I've learned that emotions often overrule intelligence. No, before you ask, that is not why I rarely emote."

"Oh." Leon curled into himself, staring forlorn at the far wall, over the wreckage of the atrium. Donnie made sense, though. Despite everything, despite knowing Raph cared, it was hard to believe. He felt scared he'd freak Raph out again, and be unable to help-!

"But I want you to know." Donnie continued, frowning at him with what could be concern. "Even though I'm not exemplary at showing it, I still do care. Logically, I know I care for you, even when my emotions are refusing to properly cooperate."

"Aw, Dee…" Leon leaned against his brother, sucking in a tired breath. Somehow, Donnie was even more comfortable than Raph. "You're pretty great, too. You sure you don't have any ulterior motives for softening me up?"

"Har-dee-har-har. I have absolutely none. I had a thrilling conversation with my counterpart earlier. As a result, I came to realize life was too short to neglect to tell you your status in my life. I'm thankful you're my brother."

"Donald, that's like… double the love!"

"That's an affirmative." Donnie cracked a grin, wrapping an arm around Leon. After a second's pause, Leon's breathing leveled out, growing heavier. Donnie was quick to shake his younger brother, sending him a glare. "Oh, nonono, don't you dare fall asleep! On me, or otherwise. I know, this was a harrowing experience, but even so!"

"Don't worry, this turtle ain't gonna doze off. I got a fine amount of sleep earlier, remember?" Leon smirked, but Donnie wasn't soothed. Leons hoved off of Donnie, leaning against the wall and offering his twin what he hoped was a reassuring smile. "I'm just prepping for when the others are ready, duh! Shouldn't be too much longer, yeah?"

"You're right."

Both Donnie and Leon's heads snapped up to look at Leonardo as he approached, tailed by both Raphs and Mikes.

"I think we've figured out the details." Leonardo continued, "So we're ready when you are. …where's our Donnie?"

Donnie jerked a thumb at the lab, regaining his emotionless bad-boy attitude. "He's in there. Chatting with April."

"Good, I'm glad he's catching her up to speed." Leonardo applauded.

"That gives us time to eat!" Mikey pointed out enthusiastically, practically shoving Leonardo to the side and extending his hands down to Leon and Donnie, offering them a hand up. "And then the second Donnie, or, uh, your guy's Donnie, can join us!"

"Right." Leon grimaced. "Food."

"You say that like it's a bad thing!" Mikey pouted, offering Leon a halfhearted glare before turning to pull him off again, ignoring Leon's protests that he didn't want to be poisoned, Mikey, please, he was sorry!

(:)

After the meal - the food surprisingly good, as blessed Michelangelo had apparently convinced Mikey not to take the savage route - the turtles got started on the last minute preparations.

To Leon's chagrin, "getting started" wasn't as fast of a process as he had originally assumed and hoped. The atrium's floor had to be completely covered in blankets, pillows, and cushions. All their phones and other such devices had to be silenced to avoid distractions. Their weapons were carefully tucked away, and the Dontrons brought out a first aid kit, setting it to the side.

Leonardo and Mikey produced tea out of nowhere at one point, passing out the mugs for "full sleepy time benefits" while each Don got a cup of coffee.

Leon felt anxious the whole time, pacing holes into the floorboards and waving his hands about never nervously, trying to mentally walk himself through the night and hype himself up. Even when given a task to help - setting up his own corner of the blanket fort - Leon felt his stomach flip over. He almost regretted eating, feeling like at any moment the contents of his stomach would come out again. Leonardo at some point handed him another fruit - kumquat, he had called it, just like the candles - and after eating Leon felt a tad bit better.

"It's not as sudden as the candles." Leonardo informed him. "These last fully for about three hours, but gradually wear out for an extra hour. Best to catch it before it wears off too much, though."

"Oh, thanks." Leon blinked, surprised. "I didn't even realize that he was starting to…" He rubbed the top of his head, closing his eyes and twisting his face towards the ground.

Leonardo nodded, offering his shoulder a quick pat. "If it makes you feel any better, I don't think it wore off enough for him to take hold or anything. You weren't acting too strange, so I wouldn't have known if I wasn't keeping an eye on the clock." He sent a quick glance at the other turtles, making sure none of them were paying attention. From his expression, Leon could guess that at least one of Leonardo's brothers was probably eavesdropping, and from his subtle glare at Raphael, Leon could summarize which one it was.

Leonardo turned back to Leon, pretending like Raphael wasn't pretending not to eavesdrop, offering a comforting smile. "To tell you a secret, you're actually doing better with this than I would have. I think having to deal with Shredder by myself for as long as you have… there's too many bad memories in it for me. My first one on one fight with Shredder landed me into a coma, don't you know."

Leon did not know that, staring at Leonardo with horror, reached up slowly to grab his chest strap, giving it a sharp tug. A… coma? Wasn't that the same thing as… sleeping indefinitely? Trapped forever with Shredder?

"...it was a five second fight." Leonardo clarified a moment later, "so you're holding your own well. Maybe you've fought your own Shredder on your own and have practice, but… ah, even so. It's impressive."

"I haven't." Leon admitted softly. "I mean, I almost have, but he glitched before he reached me the first time, and the second time Raph punched him off me, but… yeah, this is my… uh, first one on… I hate that I'm calling this the first time. Might as well count this as the second and third time, too." He laughed nervously, drawing a surprised, worried look from all three of his brothers, tuning into his distress. He waved them off, gesturing every so slightly to Leonardo. They stared at him seemingly more intently, and Leonardo turned to meet their gaze when he saw Leon's divert of attention, giving them a slightly more inviting wave than Leon's own.

They stared at Leon for a beat more, brows furrowing, but when Leon tried to wave them out a bit more commandingly, they shook their heads at them and turned back to their own chores and conversations.

"Yeah, you better run." Leon grumbled, earning a giggle from Leonardo that was quickly smothered. He raised an eyebrow at Leonardo, and his counterpart snorted into his hands, burying his face quickly into his palms. "Ha! I'll get a full laugh out of you yet!"

"Oh goodness, that's a horrible goal to have!" Leonardo snorted, swallowing down a louder laugh. "Why is that even your goal?!"

"Because we've all collectively agreed you have no sense of humor but you keep laughing! Which means you obviously do have a sense of humor, I just haven't unlocked it, yet! New achievement unlocked," Leon spread his hands out in front of him like he was imagining the words appearing above his head, "your counterpart's sense of humor!"

"Oh, man," Leonardo chortled, still not fully laughing, but it was getting there! Leon had hope. "Yeah, no, if you found out exactly what genre my humor falls into, you'd be horrified."

"Aw, try me, we're basically the same person. Except I'm witty and handsome and you're not!"

"Ooh," Leonardo mocked, "so just because we're blue and are both named 'Leo' we're the same person? Wow. Mikey-in-Dimension-X type logic there."

"I do not know what that means, but Mikey's stupid brilliant, so I'll take it as a compliment." Leon beamed, feeling a little disappointed when Leonardo just shook his head in fake exasperation, almost like he was giving up, and started to twist away. Shoot, wait, Leon wasn't ready for him to leave! After this, they'd probably go away and back home, and Leon needed advice, especially from a version of him that seemed so much older and advanced then him. Someone who actually knew how to lead, and maybe knew how to make things better with Raph. "Wait, hold on, I-!"

Leonardo turned back to him, eyes wide and confused, and Leon felt himself floundering backwards. Shoot, he hadn't meant to lose his cool like that! He just… didn't know what to do. He needed to think of something, fast-! "So, uh. After your fight with Shredder. Did you… uh, you said you…" He took a deep breath, struggling to find the words. Maybe Leonardo became the leader during his fight with Shredder. Maybe that was his wake up call, and he was here to make sure Leon didn't succumb to the same fate as him. Unlikely, but maybe. "...did everything turn out fine in the end?"

"They weren't perfect." Leonardo admitted, resting a hand on his knee. "But, yeah, it was fine. It's been a couple years, and not everything is fine… but we're fine. If that's what you're asking."

It was. It was what Leon was asking. He needed to know if everything would be fine between him and his brothers, that things would be easier after this was all said and done. After tonight, he'd be through with Shredder, and then he and his brothers could work out everything. He'd figure out how to make things easier on Raph, and they'd learn to trust him to lead them, and… everything would be okay. "Yeah. Thanks."

Leonardo offered a final smile at him, and then shoved himself up to his feet, turning to address the other turtles as they finished up their tea. To Leon's amusement, both Raph and Raphael were making the same face as they drank theirs, clearly showcasing their disregard for the drink.

"Okay, listen up." Leonardo announced, placing his hands on his hips, and delving back into the 'leader mode' Leon admired so much. "Everyone but the Donnies are going to enter Leon's mind. We won't be able to arrive all at the same time; that requires more experience and practice then we've had time for. However, as soon as you enter, try to take up positions. It's going to be fairly hard to get out of the spiritual plane unless the host himself lets us out, which means there's no real tapping out unless it's done as a group. Obviously, try to avoid serious injuries, for the Donnies' sakes if not your own."

"Yeah, Leo." Raphael muttered, smirking slightly at Michelangelo's giggle even as Leonardo rolled his eyes.

"Yeah, yeah. Anyway, since waking yourself up draws us all out," Leonardo turned back to Leon, "try not to wake yourself up until we're all ready. Wait until I give the order to pinch yourself, since that'll stop the battle altogether. Hang back, because you're our one escape out of there once we get in. We're going to keep fighting for as long as we can." The shorter blue turtle raised his fist dramatically, sweeping back over to the turtles. "Is everyone ready?"

"Hai."

"Let's do it to it!" Leon enthused.

"As we'll ever be."

"Booyeahkasha!"

"Pizza supreme in the sky help us all." Donnie groaned, while Donatello gave an overzealous thumbs up.

"Alright." Leonardo clapped his hands together. "It's time… to take a nap."

(:)

Leon blinked his eyes open an hour later - sue him, he was bad at sleeping - to familiar gray. His fingers twitch, ready to go to his katanas at a moment's notice, eyes darting about. No roar met his ears, and no bellowing behemoth came charging at him from over the hypothetical horizon. For now it felt…

Calm.

Leon took a step back, sparing half a glance over his shoulder to ensure he wasn't walking backwards into Shredder's awaiting claws. No such threat presented itself, but he reached to grab out his first sword anyway. He leveled himself into the only non-movie-inspired battle stance he knew, and took to pacing in a circle.

He didn't like this at all. The silence was unnerving, especially with how long it was taking Shredder to suddenly appear behind him. The only time it had taken Shredder so long to reveal himself was the first night, but this time was different. This time, Shredder had been left alone for two nights, and probably had free reign of… whatever this place actually was for at least half that time. And this time, it felt like Shredder was biding his time.

There was a fizzle in the air beside Leon, and the blue turtle turned in time to watch Leonardo come into focus, positioned in a kneel.

"Welcome to the party." Leon greeted, flashing a quick smile as Leonardo startled at his voice, vaulting to his feet and yanking out a sword. "You're fashionably early, and Mr. Grate-Man still hasn't shown his face."

"He will." Leonardo grimly prophesied, giving Leon a sideways look. "...did you just call him 'great'?"

"Naw, Grate. Like a cheese grater. Felt appropriate." Leon shrugged lightheartedly. He was struggling to keep his tone cheerful despite the nervousness pulsed at his chest, hoping that Leonardo couldn't tell the difference. "He doesn't usually take this long."

"I don't trust-"

A roar cut them off. Instinctively, both Leos leapt back to back, twisting against one another's shells to keep an eye on every inch of the plane surrounding them. Leon glanced down as quickly as he could at Leonardo's feet and hunched posture, and tried to replicate. He bent his knees, adjusted his hands on his hilt, and raised his sword to eye-level.

A shiver ran down his spine, and he felt Leonardo go still behind him. He turned to peer over his shoulder, Shredder looming over them, sneering down at Leonardo. Where had he…?

Leon peeled away from Leonardo, sidestepping away rapidly, pivoting to face Shredder. He did, however, make sure his counterpart remained between them. Like, no offense, but Leon didn't exactly want to get mauled.

"Two of you?" Shredder snarled, looking between Leos. "Did you duplicate?"

"You're in the wrong dimension, Shredder." Leon corrected, fingering his hilt in hidden nervousness. "And you're hurting the wrong Hamato Leonardo."

"Wrong dimension?" Shredder barked in disbelief, a throaty chuckle coming from his lips. "You must think me a fool. It is easy to see you are a past life of this wretched child!"

"This isn't reincarnation." Leonardo huffed. "I'm still alive. Leave his mind, and enter my own. Do the honorable thing, and leave him out of this!"

"Honor? What does your clan know of honor? It does not matter who the feud is between, you bring your sons and your brothers to settle a dispute that is not theirs!" Shredder slammed an elongated fist into the ground, snarling out a breath. "I may be no better, but at least I do not rely on hypocrisy!" His gaze raked over Leonardo and Leon, mouth curling into a sneer. "I see. Your pitiful bond between your family runs deep. This is your son, isn't it?"

"Excuse me?!" Leon squeaked.

"I do not look that old!" Leonardo defended, bristling. "I wasn't lying! This is another dimension, but if you won't listen…" His other sword was yanked from its hilt, and he held both blades crossed before his face.

"Why would I listen to your tricks?"

"No tricks." Leonardo promised, scooting one foot backwards. "Just me, and these." Leonardo twitched his blades, "They'll be your downfall again. Mark. My. Words."

Leon blinked, losing sight of when Leonardo left the ground, but catching sight of when Leonardo brought his swords down. Shredder blocked with his forearms before it could reach his neck, smacking Leonardo away. He twisted his head to watch Leonardo tumble, claws lashing out as he took chase.

His fists collided with the ground as Leonardo rolled away. The turtle's katanas raised once again as he pulled himself to his feet, his body lowering once again with preparation for the next attack. Shredder lunged, and Leonardo sliced his swords across Shredder's arm.

The air around Leon changed again, and he reached up to rub away a prickle on his forearm as Michelangelo appeared. Michelangelo's eyes snapped open at Shredder's next roar of rage, jumping up.

"What'd I miss?" Michelangelo demanded, keeping terrified eyes on the fight.

"Just trash-talk. They only just start- yeah, bye." Leon fell quiet as Michelangelo leaped away to join the battle.

Leon felt fidgety; wanting to help fight, but knowing, ultimately, he wouldn't really be helping. Besides, he was supposed to keep away from Shredder, anyway.

As he watched, Michelangelo dug his nunchuck blades into Shredder's shoulder. They didn't do any surface damage, and Shredder was able to shrug him off. He reached down, snagging Michelangelo by the arm and slamming him into the ground. He lifted Michelangelo again, but Leonardo set a firm kick into Shredder's chest that drove him back several steps and caused him to drop Michelangelo. Leon flinched.

Michelangelo flared out his nunchucks again, utilizing the extending chain to catch Shredder's leg. They wrapped around his leg once each before going tonight, the blades acting like a grappling hook. Michelangelo leaned backwards, starting to drag Shredder's weight toward him.

Shredder recorrected, snarling at Michelangelo. Even as he reached, Leonardo dashed at him, landing on the chain before leaping up, roundhouse kicking Shredder in the metal intwixed jaw.

"Oh boy." Mikey's voice came from Leon's side, startling the slider out of massaging his sore cheekbone. "The fight's already going…"

"Yeah." Leon agreed, shifting back into his battle stance as Mikey moved in front of him, nunchucks already spinning. "I'm getting sore just standing here. They're really going at it!"

"Aw, peachy." Mikey nodded enthusiastically, casting a look back at Leon. "But he hasn't gotten you yet?"

"Don't worry, Miguel!" Leon sidestepped Raphael as he appeared and promptly lurched forward, sais poised as he jumped into the fray. "I'm fine, they've got everything under-?!"

Shredder blipped.

Leon caught a glance of blue light surrounding him, and then he was gone. Leonardo and Michelangelo stumbled into each other, and Raphael barely managed to redirect his warpath to avoid knocking into his two brothers.

Leon's breath caught in his throat.

Shredder reappeared, claws curled around Leon's drawn sword and hand. Leon yanked backwards, but Shredder pulled him close, claws plunging for his forehead. Raph's familiar mystic fist slammed into Shredder's skull, sending him flying.

Leon stumbled back a step, into Raph's chest, hacking out a sigh as Raph curled over him protectively. His head was screaming at him.

"He can teleport?!"

"He can teleport!" Raphael echoed, shaking a fist at Shredder as the demon shaking stood. "Hey! Stay down-!"

Shredder vanished again, appearing in the same spot as before. His eyes shifted hazily out of focus, both fists curling tightly around Leon's katana. Leon blinked, ears ringing, trying to completely shove his face into Raph's chest.

Raph's other fist collided with the other side of Shredder's head, Leon's katana ripped out of his hands as Shredder went flying, Raph's hand the only thing keeping Leon from being tugged away, too. His glowing fist followed after Shredder, expanding and twisting, slamming into Shredder as he landed, keeping him pinned even as the ground cracked.

Leon's back went ramrod straight, pins and needles dancing across him as the breath was knocking out of him. There was a strange pressure on his chest, and he couldn't quite inhale, he couldn't breathe, why was he so freaked out? This wasn't right, this wasn't-!

"We've got to get rid of your swords!" Raph realized, twisting over to stare at Leon. "That's how he-!? Leo? Are you-?"

"Right." Leon gasped out, pulling out his second sword and throwing it over to their counterparts.

Raphael dropped a sai to snag the katana out of the air, stabbing it into the ground. Michelangelo kicked up the other sword from where it had fallen from Shredder's hands, catching it and throwing it over to Raphael, who placed it beside the other.

Raphael dove to grab his sai again and dodge Shredder as he teleported again. Shredder stumbled uneasily, shaking his head in confusion, one hand planted on the hilt of a katana, blinking hard. His dizziness seemed to clear just as Raphael hurled a sai at Shredder's eye. Shredder smacked it away, huffing out a growl.

"Leo, you aren't looking too good." Mikey noted, blocking Leon's view of the fights and waving his hand in front of Leon's face. "You look kinda nauseous?"

"I'm fine." Leon reassured. "Just… spooked." He sidestepped Mikey, twisting his head to look at what was happening.

Michelangelo had weaved one of his nunchucks around Leon's katanas, jumping onto Shredder's shoulder, throwing the other end around Shredder's neck. He grabbed the spinning end, shoving against Shredder and keeping him in a choke hold.

Shredder gagged, fingers tugging desperately at the chains, thrashing against Michelangelo.

Mikey gasped as the demon finally regained enough motor control to grab Michelangelo and unmercilessly started forcing him down toward the swords. Michelangelo struggled, clawing at the arm dragging him across the ground.

"I'm going to go help!" Mikey barked at Raph and Leon, not waiting for permission as he tore away.

Raphael and Leonardo had already managed to free Michelangelo by the time Mikey joined them, but that didn't stop the little mystic user from enthusiastically offering his services.

Leonardo blinked at him, eyes darting toward Raph in surprise, and then Raphael snagged Leonardo's arm, the short red turtle throwing himself over Michelangelo. At Raphael's touch, Leonardo acted on instinct, snagging Mikey and dragging him beneath him. He practically bristled, exposing his shell to Shredder's claws as they scraped over him and Raphael.

Mikey slit his arms from underneath Leonardo's armpits, flicking his nunchucks out like yoyos. Leonardo curled more firmly around him, and even from how far away Leon was, he could see how tightly Leonardo's fingers curled over Mikey's shell.

The little orange turtle's nunchucks tangled around Shredder, binding the demon's arms to his side. Shredder bellowed, twisting to charge at Mikey and Leonardo again.

Mikey gasped, kicking out from underneath Leonardo, trying to shove the blue turtle to the side. Leonardo grappled with Mikey, dragging him with him. Mikey tossed his nunchcuks over to Michelangelo, who caught one with ease. Raphael grabbed the other, giving it a quick yank the moment he got his hands on it.

Shredder jerked, legs spinning out from underneath him, only a few precious steps away from stomping Leonardo and Mikey to death.

Michelangelo gave his own line a tug as well, and together, he and Raphael twisted their arms, throwing Shredder over them and slamming him into the ground.

Leonardo released Mikey gently, lurching to his feet with a spare glance at his brother's counterpart. Once he deemed Mikey relatively unharmed, he made his way over to Shredder, unsheathing his second sword.

"Saki, this ends here." Leonardo growled, voice low and threatening as he approached, sword hovering beside his legs. Leon had to applaud him; it looked very dramatic. Michelangelo and Raphael looked up as Leonardo approached, standing on opposite sides of Shredder, keeping one foot jammed down on the chains and keeping the rest wrapped around their hands. Together, the warm colored turtles kept Shredder pinned.

Shredder strained against his bondings, each twitch making the nunchucks strain, his eyes flaring with rage. "So," he snarled, "this is how you plan to end me? Put me down like a dog?"

Leonardo glared, but didn't grace that with a response. Raphael and Michelangelo exchanged a look over Shredder, almost like they were expecting Leonardo to command them to release the demon. Leonardo made no such order, taking a few more steps forward so he stood right before Shredder.

He glowered down at the behemoth as the demon strained and pulled, the nunchucks glowing brightly as they fought against his struggles, the metal protruding from his skin scraping along the chains. Shredder snarled, back arching. The nunchucks flared.

Mikey jolted, holding a hand out fear sending tremors through his body. "Wait-!"

The nunchucks shattered.

As Shredder stood, free again, no, no, no, the pieces of the nunchucks splintered away, soaring in a thousand different directions. To Leon's horror, the pieces did not phase through the turtles like his shattered swords. These cut into Leonardo and his brothers like glass, tiny chunks of metal grazing them and imbedding deep into skin. Their arms flew up with practiced and refined defense, shielding their faces, but the metal littered everywhere else.

Mikey flinched, too, but the metal didn't touch him, phasing through miraculously. Raph screamed Mikey's name, and Mikey stumbled backwards with a light sob, whimpering out in fear. "Not again! Not again, not again!"

"It's okay, Miguel!" Leon heard himself promise, though it didn't feel okay; he was watching Shredder grab Raphael by his arm and slam him into Michelangelo, sending them both rolling. It was falling apart, it was failing- "Everything will be okay when we wake up!"

Pinch? Pinch now? He needed to wait, wait for Leonardo to tell him to… but even so, Leon settled his fingers on the back of his hand, waiting. Even though he was out of the blast range, he could feel the shrapnel cut into his skin. And oh gosh, it hurt.

Raph's arm extended, snagging Mikey's arm and tugging him back, wrapping his two youngest brothers into a hug. "Don't look, Raph'll protect you… Leo, Leo, you gotta be ready to pinch!"

Leon nodded weakly, eyes never leaving the fight.

Raphael had dragged Michelangelo back into the fight with him, interlocking hands and spinning him around, throwing him with all his might at Shredder. Michelangelo slid out his own nunchucks, extending the blades to hook around Shredder's legs.

If mystic chains couldn't hold him how could he hope to-?

Raphael tackled Shredder from behind, drawing his attention from Michelangelo's attack. Shredder reached to grab them both, twisting about and stumbling.

Leonardo leaped from above, sword flaring. He brought it down on Shredder's head, perfectly angled for the finishing blow…

Leon's neck sliced open.