Shredder's Vendetta

by Prophe-Cass

Leonardo may have beheaded Shredder, but that doesn't mean he's gone. In fact, his soul is still very much alive, just trapped in another dimension, and now he's a different turtle's problem. (Rise and 2012 crossover. Mostly the Leos, because there's not enough of those two.)

19. Chapter 19

TW: Mentions of suicide.

(:)

It didn't take longer than an hour to settle everyone in for the night. The older turtles - who had been eavesdropping as well but had been better at it - were given the living room to sleep in. The last of the clean blankets were given to them to use, but with the way they were cast into a corner, Leon doubted they would actually be used.

Raph shoved a load of laundry, mostly soiled linens, into the washer while Mikey folded up the newly dried blankets and shoved them to the side. Leon grabbed a few of the spare blankets the moment he was able to without being fixated with worried expressions from any of his family.

He was making his way to the lab to set up camp for the night when Splinter stopped him. He barely started to lean towards Splinter before his father was enveloping him in a hug, rocking him back and forth gently as he hummed soothingly into Leon's ear. Leon let him, and by the time he pulled back, Leon was feeling more confident in his ability to not break down crying.

He didn't see anyone else except for Donnie after that, everyone heading to bed to try and sleep. Leon doubted any of them would be able to rest without tossing and turning for several hours, and he wished they didn't have to suffer because of him. Or, Shredder.

Because Shredder wasn't here because of him. It wasn't his mistake.

Leon had to keep reminding himself of that, because try as he might, Leon still felt like he had done something to gain the attention of Shredder. His biggest crime was sharing a name with the guy who killed Shredder, and that's where the problem started.

And it was a problem Leon couldn't get over.

Despite Leon's confidence that none of his brothers, and perhaps their counterparts, too, were struggling to sleep, the night went by quietly and almost peacefully.

Donnie and Leon partook in brief small talk every hour or so, or whenever Leon needed help in a video game he was playing, but for the most part they ignored each other. Leon offered to help Donnie, once, feeling guilty that his older twin was doing all the work while Leon gamed, but Donnie waved him off, and that was the last of it.

Donnie stayed up long enough to make sure Leon took the next two doses of kumquats, but eventually the exhaustion over the last day finally won over Donnie, and he nodded off, head pressed against his desk. Leon threw a blanket over him, dreading the lack of no company, but didn't try to shake him awake. Instead, he turned to his video game and let it consume all of his attention.

At some point, Leon's latest kumquat wore off, but he didn't even bother getting up, just hissing out a sigh as he tried to brush off the snarling in his head as he tried to focus on running an x-cyclone around the proper pillars. The somewhat temporary solution was rendered futile when Leon glanced up and his gaze fell on Donnie.

His intrusive thoughts - no, Shredder's screams - started to scream bloody murder, thudding angrily against his skull and startling Leon with the severity of it. Slaughter, slaughter him, grab your sword and kill him for leaving you alone, for abandoning you, he's pathetic, pathetic–

Leon jolted to his feet, hissing out a threat right back to Shredder that went ignored, maybe even unheard, as he retreated back to the kitchen to fish out one of the kumquats. Shredder clawed mercilessly at his mind. He thanked whatever scrap of luck he still had that at very least, it wasn't a physical attack and the most Shredder could do was give him a shell of a headache, or else Leon would be dead already.

Thankfully, that was the most exciting part about the whole night, but it still made Leon stay on edge enough that he couldn't focus on his game for another hour, nervously bouncing his foot as he tried to let his mind get back into orientation. Leon cursed himself for letting Shredder's influence fester as long as it did, but he had.

Was it laziness? Procrastination?

Either way, he had believed he could handle it, and he absolutely could not.

Leon glanced up at the time more regularly after that, counting down the hours and minutes until it was time for his next kumquat. It was a few minutes short of 9am, a ninja's early evening but a person's midmorning, that Leon determined it was time for his next one. It was slightly premature, but at least he was beating Shredder.

Despite all his confidence and preparation, Leon still deflated against the chair with a sigh for a moment, closing his eyes in annoyance. Ditching the video game somewhat reluctantly, Leon pulled himself stiffly upright, stretching each limb in exhaustion. He listened to the half-satisfying pop that rang out from his muscles, relaxing with one last roll of each shoulder.

He felt sore, yeah, but so much better than he had nearly ten hours ago. His head was clear. All his fatigue-induced fears had died down until they were barely more than a whisper, and he felt confident in his ability to socialize without breaking down. Just thinking about it made Leon wince with embarrassment over his displays of immaturity the night before.

His brothers and their counterparts would all argue that it wasn't childish of him to collapse into hysterics, but Leon certainly couldn't agree. Maybe he was being a hypocrite, since he would argue with his brothers if they dared suggest that their breakdowns were foolish, but eh, sue him. He was entitled to his own opinion.

Speaking of his breakdown, he was pretty hungry. Throwing up certainly hadn't done Leon any favours, but he hadn't had much of an appetite immediately after. He had even rejected Mikey's frantic inquiries on whether or not he wanted food, which was feeling more like a mistake with each passing hour. At least with his rejection, Mikey had gone to bed at a reasonable time instead of staying up to cook something up. At least Leon could fix himself up something.

Leon spared one last look back at Donnie, smiling softly. He truly was grateful that Donnie had stayed up with him, even though he only lasted halfway into the night. He was a good brother, and Leon might have gone crazy with loneliness if Donnie hadn't even tried and went to bed with the rest of the family.

Leon left the lab behind, heading for the kitchen with a sigh, wondering what kind of tea he should grab. Splinter had smuggled the tea he had brought out back to his room, while Michelangelo had tucked all of his family's boxes back into one of the kitchen cupboards. That left him with a plethora of tea options to choose from, and a few that he hadn't tasted before.

His main concern about the tea and any food was that the tastes wouldn't clash too much with the kumquats. Usually, Mikey was good about making sure all the foods served tasted good together, but Leon was on his own this morning. He hoped he wouldn't burn the toast and destroy the toaster this time. He swore that he was cursed with the inability to make toast.

As Leon neared the bathroom, one of the last rooms before the kitchen, he paused. He was surprised to see Leonardo standing in the bathroom, his back to Leon and facing the mirror, instead, the door halfway open. Leon couldn't see Leonardo's face in the mirror, and he wasn't wearing his mask or his gear.

He was holding a knife next to his head, the blade slightly slanted with the dull side pressed against his face. He didn't pay attention to Leon, too busy doing… Whatever it was.

Frankly, Leon was surprised to see him up already. He was expecting everyone to sleep for a solid twelve hours after the hectic day yesterday, but seeing as how Leonardo was already up, he wondered if the older turtles simply slept less.

Leon leaned against the doorway, kicking out his legs far enough away from him that he knew Leonardo could see him in his peripheral vision and crossed his arms as he quirked an eye ridge. "So…" He mused, nodding at the blade. "Who's suicidal now?"

Leonardo lowered the blade, turning around with a sigh as he rolled his eyes at Leon. "Poor form. The buildup and punchline weren't that great. Try again tomorrow."

"Yeah, not my best one. I'll admit, dark humor isn't really my thing." Leon admitted, holding up his hands in placid surrender as he straightened up. Leonardo turned back to the mirror and held back up the knife, leaning over the counter. "But, like, seriously, what are you doing?"

Once again, Leonardo put down the knife and turned to Leon, gesturing with one hand at his face. "Eyeliner."

Leon blinked at Leonardo in surprise, then looked closer, this time noticing the small black wings extending out from one of his eyes. In the hand that hadn't been holding the knife, he held a long eyeliner pen, now clenched firmly at his side as he watched Leon.

"Woah!" Leon applauded with a whistle, tilting his head to try and get a better look. "You're really good at that. I didn't even notice it. Were you wearing some yesterday, too?"

"Yeah, but my mask covers it." Leonardo admitted, glancing down to scowl at his mask hanging loosely around his neck, giving one of the eyeholes a gentle tug. "And drawing permanent lines on my mask doesn't feel very respectful, and it also removes the tradition out of doing it every day."

"And the knife…?"

"It helps me draw the lines straight. I don't necessarily need it anymore, but it's fun." Leonardo shrugged, leaving the knife on the counter as he turned back to the mirror. Now that Leon was close enough to see Leonardo's reflection, he noticed that Leonardo closed the eye he wasn't currently working on in order to focus on his eyeliner.

"Can I watch?" Leon ventured, peeking over his shoulder and fidgeting.

Leonardo gestured at the counter on the other side of him than the door with his free hand, moving a step to the side to allow Leon to leap onto it with ease. The younger blue turtle found a comfortable perch quickly, tilting his head back to try and get a good view.

Leonardo shifted to the other side, already done making the thick wings on his left eye and moved onto the next side, allowing Leon an easier view.

"You know," Leonardo mused, pulling back briefly to glance at Leon before resuming the routine. "I used to do this with my own father. Master Splinter used to wear airainā when he was human, but he couldn't find a brand that looked good with his fur later. So… he did it with me."

"Oh, y'mean how a lot of, uh, human mothers do their daughter's hair or whatever?" Leon guessed, pursing his lips in thought.

"Yeah, exactly like that." Leonardo agreed as he carefully finished tracing his eye, frowning at the mirror as he made a minuscule adjustment. "Ever since I was eight, to when I was around thirteen or so, he always made it a point to do mine. I guess eventually I got it in my mind that I didn't want him doing it anymore, and didn't even do it myself for a few years. I don't think I started again until after I met Karai."

"Oh." Leon nodded softly, thinking of Gram-Gram. He hadn't even noticed she was wearing eyeliner, but looking back on it she obviously had been. Despite all Leon's beauty routines for his face, he had never considered wearing makeup, but now he kind of wanted to. "Did she…?"

"…wear eyeliner? Yeah. She also has some flame… eye shadow, I think it's called, coming off of her eyes. It kinda looks like your markings." Leonardo shrugged easily, applying a thin stroke coming off of his eye, tilting his head in the mirror to check how straight it was. "I think I started wearing mine to impress her."

"Got it." Leon had the feeling that Leonardo's Karai had managed to stick around longer than his own had. Nowadays, there was nobody to impress. She didn't come to him or any of his brothers. So much for never being alone…

"Nowadays, I'm doing it more to feel closer to Sensei than to impress her." Leonardo hummed, sounding like he was trying to reassure Leon, but of what, Leon didn't have the slightest clue. Leonardo didn't seem to be paying much attention to Leon's sudden quietness, still engrossed in his story and makeup. "Which is a good thing, since she would tease me mercilessly otherwise."

That… Didn't particularly sound like Karai, but who was Leon to judge? Clearly, Leonardo had known her longer, perhaps still knew her. Leon felt a prickling of disappointment in his abdomen, wishing she was still around. He wanted to learn more about her, but…

Leonardo finished touching up his eyeliner, leaning back with a confident nod. He turned to Leon, gesturing from his younger counterpart to the eyeliner pen. "Do you want some?"

"I would, but I'm not sure how." Leon admitted, twisting his hands together. "Pops never did mine."

"I can do yours." Leonardo tsked, reaching his leg over to snag a stool that was pushed beside the counter, hidden for so long that Leon had forgotten it was there for years. The surprise appearance of the stool was almost enough for Leon to forget about Gram-Gram, staring at the piece of furniture in wonder, instead.

Leonardo stepped onto it so that he could reach Leon's eyes, reaching down with the pen carefully. "Try not to move too much. I don't want to poke your eye out."

"Yeah, well, promise I won't bite." Leon reassured, flapping his hand in a dismissive manner. A second later, a chilling thought occurred to him and he sat up straight, making Leonardo flinch and almost getting his eye poked out. "Shell! But I can't promise Shredder won't!"

"What?" Leonardo blinked, taking a step back as Leon hopped off the counter and took tearing off down the hall. He peered around the corner after Leon, watching him go in confusion and then following after him.

Leon ducked into the kitchen, beeling for the fridge and swinging open the door, digging out the top kumquat from the bottom shelf. He tossed it from hand to hand, nibbling his lip. He debated whether to wait until he felt the first flickers of Shredder's snarls or to just have it now. He didn't want to risk it not working because he had it too early. He doubted that would be the case, but better safe than sorry.

Leonardo rounded the corner after him, worrying, the crown of his head furrowed. His face relaxed when he noticed the kumquat, rolling his shoulders back in an attempt to remove the tension. "Oh, good." He hummed, twisting the knife he had been holding in his hand around so that it was hidden from view. "I… thought you meant something else."

"Yeah, sorry." Leon huffed with a wince. "He hasn't like… I don't know, woken up yet? It's about time for him to, though, and that's sorta why I'm up and about in the first place. I'm good to have this before the last one runs out, right?"

"Right." Leonardo agreed, kneeling down beside him. "I guess since you're only up and about for the kumquats, you're going to head back to join Donnie once you're done here?"

"Naw, I don't think he's awake." Leon flapped his hand dismissively before returning his attention to peeling the kumquat, flicking the skin at Leonardo. Leonardo barely managed to get a hand up to block it in time, an annoyed frown tugging at his lips. "He fell asleep hours ago.

"Pizza supreme knows he needs it." Leon whispered the last sentence under his breath, ignoring Leonardo's confused expression. "But, yeah, I'm all yours. I'm going to look so sick with eyeliner, if you think I'm wearing a mask at all today, you're dead wrong."

"Actually." Leonardo hesitated, squirming slightly. "If you could still wear it, I'd really appreciate it. Only Donnie, er, my Donnie, knows that I wear it, and that's only because he's stumbled across me sometimes in the morning. I don't want Raphael and Mike knowing."

"Oh, yeah, that makes sense." Leon's face twisted into a scowl, swallowing the down his first bite and leaning back against his hand. "Brothers, am I right? Good to know our twins always have our backs, yeah?"

Leonardo blinked, surprised etching across his face. "Twin?"

"Yeah? Y'know, Leo and Donnie, Leon and Don, We're the full Dee-Lee-o, y'know?" Leon frowned when Leonardo's face remained blank and tried again. "Donnie and I are twins, dude? Aren't you and Dona-Tall-O?"

"First of all, never call him that." Leonardo deadpanned, though Leon could see the amusement creeping through his carefully masked expression. "He once punched out Raphael when he used that nickname. Second, we're quadruplets. Not twins."

"I mean, sure, but if you were to have a twin-"

"Raph, all the way."

"Geez, really?" Leon cringed, sticking out his tongue in playful disgust. "Raph? I get why you wouldn't want Donnie, but com'n, Mikey's right there!"

"For the record, I prefer us as quadruplets. I'm picking Raph because we work well together. He holds together the team, our family, when I can't. When I was in that coma I mentioned, he was the one making sure everyone was okay. He's good at what he does, and what he does is be the greatest little brother." Leonardo's fond smile dropped, and he poked Leon's plastron threateningly. "But, no matter what you call us, brothers, twins, quadruplets, whatever, I'm always the oldest."

"Yeah, well, speaking as someone who's always trying to avoid responsibilities, I'm the third oldest, and don't you ever forget it." Leon bragged, pushing himself up to his feet and dusting himself off. He extended a hand down to Leonardo, pulling him after Leon. "Alright, eyelining time!" Leon fist-pumped enthusiastically, still clinging onto Leonardo's free hand as he led the older turtle out of the room. His other arm remained pointed straight in the air, trying to emulate all his excitement into one motion.

Behind him, he could practically feel Leonardo's overly exaggerated roll of his eyes, but he didn't bother turning around to confirm it. He already knew what was waiting for him if he did, so he kept his attention mounted firmly ahead and refused to let the skip bleed out of his step.

The second they reached the bathroom again, Leon launched himself up onto the counter while Leonardo turned to his gear piled into the corner. Leonardo slipped the blade back into the hilt of one of his swords. Leon arched an eyebrow in surprise, leaning forwards as much as he could without slipping off of the counter.

"Dude, knife in the hilt? That is so awesome. It's like a Russian nesting doll… but for swords!" Leon applauded, watching Leonardo put his sword completely back into the sheath.

"Yeah, now I just need to remember to use it for something aside from eyeliner." Leonardo hummed, his tone rising slightly into something that sounded like a joke, propping the sheath against the wall. "Anyway, is there a particular style you want?"

Leon thought of Gram-Gram, and his lip curled thoughtfully, trying to remember the style of hers. He remembered that she definitely had wings, but he couldn't remember the placement, or how thick she had worn them. As familiar as it seemed, the details were lost on him, and all he could do was purse his lips as he thought.

"Am I free to have artistic control?" Leonardo asked, taking in his expression and picking back up the eyeliner pen with a sympathetic smile.

"Yeah, but I definitely want the wings." Leon agreed, pulling down his own mask around his neck like Leon's was, tilting his head so that Leonardo had easy access as he stepped back up onto the stool. "Other than that, no preference."

"Alright." Leonardo hummed, lightly putting one hand over Leon's face to tip his head properly and pull his skin taut. Leon pouted with fake annoyance with the pressure on the side of his face, but quickly let his face fall back to being neutral as Leonardo gently applied the first line.

"Does it bother you being so short?" Leon joked, managing to catch Leonardo's eye with a grin. Leonardo removed the pen and punched Leon's arm, making Leon jolt back with a wince as his appendage lit up with a dull stabbing pain. "Ow! Okay, okay, didn't know you were so sensitive!"

"No, I just don't put up with jerks." Leonardo deadpanned, returning to Leon's eye. "I'm also not above poking you with this thing. If you want to be blind, just insult me again."

"Point taken." Leon agreed, putting his hands back in his lap while Leonardo went back to his eyes.

Leonardo finished one part of eyeliner and was moving on to his second eye before he spoke again. "You said you didn't like the idea of being twins with Raph. Why is that?"

"No, no, I was messing around. I don't mind who's twins with whom. If I was twins with Raph, then I don't think things would be much different as they are now. Donnie hardly acknowledges that we are twins, anyway, and I don't think Raph would be any better about it." Leon shrugged good naturedly, trying not to lean away from the feather-light touch of the pen as it brushed against the corner of his eye. It somehow was ticklish and soothing all at once. "What about your Raph? Do you think he'd talk about it?"

"Oh, absolutely not. I don't think any of us would bring it up, except Mikey. He's still got that… I don't know what to call it? Enthusiasm?"

"Child-like wonder." Leon offered, lifting his hand in a sparkling-motion, satisfied with his efforts when Leonardo snorted. It wasn't a laugh, but it was getting there. He at least was on the right track with amusing him, he just had to keep it up.

"Yeah, sure. Mikey is…" A thoughtful smile appeared on Leonardo's face, and he brushed the pen carefully along Leon's eyelashes, thickening it up. "Well, both our Mikeys are sort of… youthful, aren't they? But they're both strong and independent, and they put a lot of thought into what makes us happy, instead of ourselves."

"Shell." Leon cursed with a light chuckle, tempted to run a hand down his face but resisting as Leonardo glanced down at his hand briefly with a warning look. "They're really just sort of… Like us, huh?"

"Don't remind me." Leonardo deadpanned, rolling his eyes. "He's all so- Wait. What?"

"What?" Leon asked politely, wincing as Leonardo dabbed a part of his face he hadn't touched yet, likely leaving a smear behind. "Ah, hey! Dude, if you want me to be able to hide the eyeliner-!"

"Yeah, yeah," Leonardo huffed, ripping off a fold of toilet paper and wiping the speck of makeup off of Leon's cheek. "But… We've never talked about that." At Leon's expression, he hesitated, then elaborated. "The. Sacrificial thing. Sacrificing our own needs for our brothers. Have we talked about that?"

"I… don't know. I thought we did? Or just… Implied? We're the same person, and if I do, then I kind of just assumed you did, too?"

"Yeah." Leonardo lightly breathed out underneath his breath. "This is starting to have drawbacks."

"Sorry." Leon apologized as Leonardo finished up and capped the eyeliner pen, tucking it away with the rest of his gear. "I kinda just guessed that you'd be comfortable talking about it with… Well, me? With you? I dunno."

"Yeah, well." Leonardo shrugged, looking back up at Leon with eyes that were far too tired for someone who had just slept for over eight hours. "Same here, really. I shouldn't have… Assumed that you wanted to… Not to mention say it out loud."

"Dude, are you still on about the 'suicide' thing? Don't worry about it, it doesn't bug me anymore. I was just… Low on just about everything yesterday. All good now, though!" Leon thumped his chest confidently, beaming at Leonardo. Leonardo still looked doubtful, so Leon pressed on. "Look, dude, honestly, water under the bridge. And I get why you thought it and everything, so we're good, m'kay?"

Leonardo blinked at him a few times, then shook his head. "But I said it in front of your brothers-!"

"Holy moly, dude!" Leon snapped, tossing his hands in the air. "No, they were eavesdropping! You're worse than I am! And I'm pretty bad! I get why you thought and assumed what you did, okay? The worst thing that happened from that whole thing is now I'm hungry, so what do you say we make toast and just forget about it?"

Leonardo paused, nudging his fingers together hesitantly, then sighed with reluctance. He grabbed his sheath and slid it back around his arms, and straightened, gesturing Leon out. "Yeah. Sounds good."

"Great!" Leon praised, hopping off the counter. "Let's- wait, hold on!" Leon whipped back around and stared at himself in the mirror, leaning forwards to get a good look at his new wings.

They were elegant, starting off thick and winding up being thin little pricks with a single swipe. His eyelids had a heaviness about them that brought out his red eyes with a few bold strokes. He was slightly reminded of the Hamato Clan outfits Splinter had decked them out in what felt like ages ago, the black drawing out the red. The black eyeliner brought out his stripes and eyes in the best of ways, and Leon felt soft as he imagined Gram-Gram with the look.

"Holy chalupa, are you okay?" Leonardo's voice broke through the stupor he had accidentally draped himself with, and his head snapped up in surprise.

Leon felt something wet on his cheeks and he reached up to touch his face, surprised when it came back with tears. What…? When had I started…? "Oh." Was all he could bring himself to say, raising his gaze back to the mirror to see how bad it had messed up his eyeliner as he wiped them away.

Leonardo wordlessly handed him a wad of toilet paper, and Leon found himself acting even more carefully with it in his hands, not wanting to ruin it for anything, because…

It really was like Gram-Gram's. It was too much like hers, and Leon hadn't even remembered how hers had looked until now. He didn't know how to handle it. He didn't know what to say at all.

"Sorry." Leon whined, waving off Leonardo when his older counterpart edged in a step closer. "Not meaning to ruin it, it's just…" He sniffled, hoping against hope that those were the last of his tears, just a short little cry. He dabbed the last of the liquid away, and was relieved to find that the eyeliner was vastly unaffected. He shoved the toilet paper to the side, and Leonardo took it from him and deposited it.

"It's nothing." Leon conceded, rubbing his hand across his head. "It- it looks great, you did a great job, I… I just…" He gave his words time to float in the air, lost and without meaning, as he tried to process his own emotions and why it felt like he had just been hit by a truck. He really couldn't handle a single conversation anymore, could he? "…It looks like Gram-Gram's."

"Ah." Leonardo said in a tone that said he didn't understand what Leon meant, nodding sympathetically. "Are you sure you're fine with it? I can change something, or-?"

"No, it's perfect, I'll just…" Leon hesitated, looking in the mirror again, and something excited bubbled up in his stomach. He had Gram-Gram's eyes. And it wasn't just the eyeliner, though it certainly helped bring out the resemblance. Something soft increased in Leon's chest, and he realized that he absolutely had not been crying because he was upset.

He was close to Gram-Gram. Even if he hadn't known his whole time, he was. He had been looking in the mirror and been seeing her for as long as he could remember. He had just never realized it until now.

He was not alone. She was indirectly here.

Even though he had led her to her death, even though he had basically doomed her the section they stepped through the portal, she was still here. Inaccessible, maybe, and perhaps she had long since abandoned him, but… pieces of her were still a part of him.

And that thought shoved its way through the grief until it made itself at home in that forefront of Leon's mind.

"You're good at this." Leon mused quietly, lifting his mask back into place and tightening the back of it so it wouldn't fall. Really, the only reason he was even wearing his mask at all was because Leonardo asked him to. If he had it his way, he'd keep his whole face visible if only to brag about it to his brothers when they woke up. "I really love it."

Leonardo nodded half-heartedly, still eying him in worry as he pulled up his own mask over his eyes. He reached over a second later to adjust Leon's mask to make sure it was hiding the eyeliner, only letting go once he was satisfied.

"Are you sure you're fine?" Leonardo asked at length, strapping on his elbow and knee pads, slipping a few weapons into his wrappings in a methodical way. The action felt rehearsed, but Leon didn't dare comment. "I didn't mean to make you upset…"

"Not upset." Leon corrected, reaching up to touch the piece of mask covering his wings. "I'm actually… Really happy, is all." He hesitated, allowing Leonardo to exit the room, first, and trailed after him, trying to figure out how to ease the tension. "…you and Karai. Were you close?"

It wasn't what he meant to say, and from the way Leonardo paused briefly before continuing on, he assumed it certainly wasn't the right thing to say.

"We still are." Leonardo reassured, looking over his shoulder with a raised eyebrow. "I've been helping her out lately whenever I'm not busy. Which has been a lot this last year, honestly. There was one demon we faced, Kavaxas, several months ago. He tried to resurrect Shredder, but it didn't… stick? Shredder tossed them both back into the aether."

"Then why's he attacking me? If he put himself and another demon back in, then he should want to stay there? Right? That sounds right… Right?" Leon hummed, trailing one hand along the door frame as he followed Leonardo into the kitchen, arching an eyebrow.

"I don't know." Leonardo shrugged, sending a desperate look at Leon as he beelined for the toaster to plug it in. "He's always been… Well, not always, Karai says it got a lot worse after we met him, but Shredder's a bit insane. He goes back and forth between being conniving and just plain… for lack of a better word… stupid."

"Yeah, that sounds about right." Leon allowed, cracking his fingers before digging out the bread bag to pull out a few slices.

"Yeah, but anyway, that was the last time we were really busy. We've had a couple adventures in between, like there was one alien invasion that lasted for about a day, and it was… bad." Leonardo frowned with the memory, shaking his head. "We lost… We almost lost Mike… Michelangelo. We thought we had. And then somehow, magically, he just…" Leonardo inhaled, exhaled, and took a couple steps away from the toaster. "Well, that's about it. Karai helped us both times, so it's a give-and-take situation. She helps us when we need help, and I help her whenever I can."

"I guess that makes sense." Leon agreed, jealousy bubbling up underneath his skin and shell, but tried to swallow it back. It was futile, he knew, but he tried anyway. "With all your spiritual mojo, it makes sense that you'd be able to talk to her and… I dunno, what kind of spirity worldy things does she have you do?"

"What?" Leonardo balked, arching an eyebrow in surprise. "What do you mean spirity worldy…" The words sounded ridiculous coming out of his mouth, and he seemed to realize it a second later, clamping his jaw shut. His eyes rooted firmly on the ground, just like Leon's did when he was deep in thought, and his arms tensed.

"Is your Karai alive?" Leon asked, though it hurt to say aloud, feeling too much like he was announcing his own Karai's death. Leonardo's face lit up with realization all at once, and he offered a small nod. "Oh. Good."

Leonardo nodded once again, hands pulling into tight fists, and he let out an airy laugh. "So, this is what it feels like."

"What?"

"Learning." Leonardo waved his hand dismissively, but he seemed to realize it wasn't descriptive enough and tried again. "…about this kind of… Situation. How did she…?"

"Shredder." Leon didn't bother explaining that it was only the short answer and not the full story, lined with regrets and self-doubt and blame. Shredder had been the one to kill her, but Leon had been the one to bring her to the executioner's block.

"Of course it was." Leonardo hissed, fingers digging into his skin and mask alike as he dragged his hand along his face, leaving lines of pale pressed skin and wadded up fabric. "He'll stop at nothing for his stupid vendetta, and… When did he… How long did you…?"

"We only knew her for a few hours." Leon admitted with a wince, returning his gaze to the floor. "I guess I shouldn't be too hung up on it, though. I mean, she was sleeping most of the time, and it's not like we knew her our whole lives like you did with– I mean… It's cool. Totally cool. I'm glad you know her."

"Yeah." Leonardo agreed, going to rub the back of his head. He eyed the toaster, and then looked back at Leon, jerking his thumb towards it pointedly. "Oh, did you want the toaster? I would do it, but I'm banned from the kitchen."

"What, really, you? Banned from the kitchen? Dude, you're a total boy scout, what'd you do?" Leon balked, slipping the toast in and pressing down the lever before turning to face his counterpart again. He was trying to distract himself from Karai, he knew, but his mind was turning over the pieces uncomfortably to the point where he didn't even try to argue with Leonardo's dismissive response.

"So!" Leon found himself bursting out in the middle of one of Leonardo's expressions, startling the older blue turtle back to focusing on him. "You're pretty close to her - Karai - you help her out, and…? Uh, is she…?"

Leonardo blinked, clearly caught off guard by the reorientation of the conversation, but nodded slowly as he tried to guess what Leon was about to ask. "She's my best friend. I'll… uh, if you want, after all this is over, I could bring her over sometime?"

Leon swallowed back the ringing in his ears, the curious whispers of if she cares about Leonardo so much, why isn't she here for you? Are you so much of a screw-up that she couldn't stand you? The worst part was that he knew that particular voice wasn't Shredder. It was him. All him. "Sure. It'd be cool to meet Gram-Gram again. Different version of her or no. You'd just, uh… have to ask my brothers. They knew her better." Liar.

"Wait, hold on, back up." Leonardo interrupted, holding up one hand to stop Leon in his tracks, staring at him like he had grown an extra head. "Karai is your mysterious Gram-Gram?"

"Yeah?" Leon startled, both eyebridges rising. He already knew that Leonardo hadn't known who Gram-Gram was, but he figured once he put together the clues it would all make sense. After all, who would be their Gram-Gram if not for their grandmother? …Unless she wasn't their grandmother at all. "Wait, huh, is she not your great - times a million - grandma?"

"No! Why would she-?!" Leonardo stammered, flailing his arms and pointing all over the place. "No! Try 'big sister'!" At Leon's expression, he struggled to explain, face pinching in frustration. "I mean, technically we're adopted, since she's Master Splinters' daughter, and all our DNA comes from pet shop owners, but–! That's besides the point! Karai's our sister!"

"Yeah, what." At this point, it wasn't even a question, just reluctant acceptance that this ridiculous confusion was their life. "Wait, wait, so she isn't Shredder's daughter?"

"Oh, he'll tell you she is." Leonardo grunted, rolling his eyes with adamant annoyance. "It's a mess, but basically Shredder kidnapped her when she was a baby and managed to not only manipulate her into thinking he's her father, but also manipulate himself."

"Wait, back up, he kidnapped her, he knows he kidnapped her, yeah?" Leon asked, waiting for Leonardo's nod before closing his eyes tightly. "And he thinks he's her dad anyway? What the shell?!"

"That's what we've been saying for ages! He's got to be insane!" Leonardo admonished, sounding half desperate and pretty annoyed, throwing his hands up. "There's no other-" Leonardo let out an undignified noise as the toast burst out of the toaster, startling him back a few steps as he whipped out his swords.

Leon wrinkled his nose at the burned toast that greeted him, reaching out to pick them up with two fingers. They sizzled against his fingers, and he tossed them against a plate, scowling at them. "Oh, yeah." He grumbled, glancing over to meet Leonardo's surprised expression as the older slid his swords back into place. "I forgot I'm also banned from the kitchen."

Leonardo snorted, rolling his eyes. "Wow. Guess it actually is a Leo thing."

"Aw, shut up." Leon stuck out his tongue, tossing one of the burnt slices over to Leonardo. "Eat your toasted toast."

Leonardo scrambled to catch the toast, fumbling it from hand to hand as he tried to avoid burning himself. He stuffed it into his mouth, wincing slightly as he leveled a withering glare at Leon.

Leon chortled at the expression, rolling his eyes in exasperation as he lifted up his own plate and dodging Leonardo's hands. Leonardo glared at him, but reached for the cupboard to grab his own plate.

Leon watched him thoughtfully for a second, then dared to venture "Hey… Totally cool if you say 'no', but do you want to get stripes like mine?"

Leonardo's head sprung up, the bewilderment on his face fading into anticipation. He dropped the toast onto his plate, setting it down onto the counter. "I assume you don't mean the violent option, but in any case, it sounds fun. Yours are genetic, right?"

"Yeah, so I don't exactly need or even have red eyeshadow, but I have a great supplier." Leon pulled out his phone, sending a quick text over to Casey. Hey do you have red eye shadow? I'll pay you bck

Hardly a few seconds passed, not even enough time for Leon to think about putting away his phone, when Casey responded. YES I AM COMING! I HAVE DONUTS! A few beats later and a 'no additional fees apply' image popped up.

"Donuts?" Leon grumbled under his breath. Donuts? He texted.

"Donuts?" Leonardo echoed, peering over Leon's shoulder at the texter ID. "…okay, I give up, who's 'Cassie, foot-emoji twice, fire, red heart, knife, hockey stick'?"

"Hm, yeah, you're right, too many emojis." Leon agreed, editing Casey's profile to no longer include foot emojis. After a second's consideration, he also removed the red heart. "It's Casey."

"That explains the hockey stick."

"Yeah, yeah. I just don't know how she spells it."

"Try C-A-S-E-Y. It's how it's traditionally spelled." Leonardo deadpanned, glancing from the screen up to Leon with an expression that conveyed his disapproval. Usually, only Hueso could land the 'you're an idiot and I don't understand how you've survived this long' face so perfectly, but Leonardo was going to force the skeleton to make a run for his money. "Who the shell spells it like Cassie?!"

"An intellectual!" Leon whined even as he changed Cassie to Casey. As he edited her contact, his phone buzzed with DONUTS! from Casey. "Look, I thought it followed the Donatello-to-Donnie rule. Where you just shorten the full name down to the first few letters and pin an ie to the end, or something, but Casie looked weird with one s!"

"I'm not following." Leonardo admitted, arching an eyebrow. "Are you saying his - I mean, her - name should be written Cassey?"

"This is not a conversation that should be happening verbally! We're just saying the same word! This! This is why I'm confused!" Leon tossed up his hands, keeping a tight grip on his phone. "I swear, April's so smart, using our full names as her contacts. I swear, after the Mickey incident of '13, she learned."

"Oh," Leonardo nodded rapidly, a small smile flooding his face. "Messed up how to spell the nicknames, huh? Our April did the same thing! Donny, with a y, Mickey, like the mouse, and Ralph."

"Oh my gosh! Yes! But you and I, we were spared from her horrendous nicknaming!" Leon whooped, exchanging a grin with Leonardo. "Leo is impossible to misspell."

"She spelled mine as Leon." Leonardo admitted with a wince, though his smile was still in place. "Not as bad as everyone else's, obviously, but it feels… strange, in retrospect."

"Huh?" Leon blinked, surprised. "Why?"

"Well, because…" Leonardo shifted awkwardly, then met his gaze evenly, tilting his head ever so subtly. "Leon is your name."

"What?" Leon balked, taken aback. "No, it's not! I mean, yes! It totally is! But it's a nickname! Leo is my name! Donnie's, like, the only one who calls me 'Leon'."

Leonardo stared at him for several long, agonizing seconds, clearly trying to piece this whole mess of a situation together. "Huh." Was all he said in the end.

"Uh." Leon glanced to the side anxiously, curious over Leonardo's silence. He fidgeted, then finally turned back to face Leonardo. "What's up, big-little buddy?"

"Well, I've got bad news." Leonardo announced hesitantly, clasping his hands together behind his back with a sympathetic nod as he rocked forward on his heels.

"Ooh, boy." Leon smiled, feeling a tad confused on what could lead to such a display of seriousness that he didn't know if it was pretend or not. "Can I at least wash it down with good news?"

"No."

"Oh."

"Now, this'll be a bit upsetting, but you'll pull through…" Leonardo patted his shoulder forlornly, and let his hand rest over the joint.. "It's too late for us. We heard one of your brothers - it must've been Donnie - call you that when we first met, and now it's stuck in our heads. You're Leon to my family now, whether you like it or not."

Leon stared at him for a moment, his chest feeling empty for a few seconds, and then his entire body tingled with delight, and a bright grin cracked his face. He tilted his head back and laughed, loud and boisterous. He lifted his hand up to clasp over Leonardo's, still planted on his shoulder, leaning slightly forward as his head came back down, seconds away from doubling over with laughter. "Oh my gosh, dude, I love that! I mean- Pfft, holy shell, dude! You got my heart going!"

"That was easy." Leonardo grinned, twisting his hand out of Leon's grip and giving it a light shake. "You've got one heck of a grip, I'm impressed."

"You know," Leon wheezed, glossing over the compliment and trying to grab Leonardo's hand. Leonardo put his other hand out to stop Leon, planted against his face and dangling the other one as far back as it could go, a bright grin on his face. "I still need to make you laugh~!"

"Oh, right!" Leonardo remembered, sticking his nose in the air pompously. "Good luck with that one, Leon."

"You actually do call me Leon!" Leon crowed, beyond delighted. "Hey, that's-!"

"Shhhhh!" Leonardo scolded lightly, looking on the brink of a chuckle but withstood from letting it out, much to Leon's chagrin. "People are still sleeping!"

"They can suffer!" Leon whined, overly dramatic, slackening his shove against Leonardo's hand enough that Leonardo's arm also relaxed. He made a quick dive for his counterpart's other hand in his brief distraction, barely missing it as Leonardo spun around, managing to dodge the attack. "Hey!"

Leonardo grabbed his arm as he skidded past and kneed him in the shell, but pulled Leon against his chest at the same time, half flipping Leon over his leg. Leon kicked out as he went, and managed to snag his ankle around Leonardo's neck. Both blue turtles tumbled into each other, sprawled out across each other. The table thunked as Leon's shell shoved against it, shifting a few inches to the side.

Leon laughed loudly, managing to halfway sit up and catching a glimpse of Leonardo grinning like an idiot and obviously trying not to laugh. His head was turned slightly, just enough that Leon could see the side of his smile.

"You're so mean!" Leon bemoaned, chortling as he brought his hand down to punch Leonardo's arm. "I shouldn't have said anything, now you won't laugh! I messed that up!"

"You really did." Leonardo got his arms underneath him and shoved himself off of Leon, managing to sit himself up while ruffling Leon's nonexistent hair. "Now I know how to spite you and to avoid laughing."

"You're the worst." Leon determined, but his bright smirk never left.

They completely untangled themselves from each other, but didn't move away from one another. Leon leaned against Leonardo's shell, and while Leonardo made no move to squish against him, the older turtle didn't move away, either. Leon counted it as a win, beaming.

"Look." Leonardo said, after a moment of comfortable silence, sliding his plate, which he somehow hadn't dropped, onto the table behind them and looking for all the world like he would rather throw the toast into the trash. Leon didn't blame him; it probably tasted like ash. "This is going to be a…. rough change of topic, but did you… Do you want to talk about your Karai?"

Leon's heart dropped. All the glee that had built up over the course of the morning came crashing down, and he turned to stare, wide-eyed and full of shock, at Leonardo. "What?"

"You don't need to if you don't want to." Leonardo reassured him carefully, pulling back slowly, but Leon glared at him until he eased back into place. "But, it does help to talk about it, especially with someone who won't laugh at you, like our brothers."

"My brothers can be serious when they want."

"So can mine! That's not what I meant! But they can be really overbearing, and it's exhausting. No matter how they act, it often doesn't help. Not in the way a different listening ear can be." Leonardo suggested, nudging Leon's arm lightly. "So, if you ever want to talk about anything, just let me know."

"Well." Leon started, appreciating how Leonardo was approaching the situation. Talking to someone who wasn't his brothers or April sounded good, and Leonardo was right. Even when they weren't making jokes and trying to lighten the mood - huh, he guessed coping with jokes was a family thing - they wound up being annoying or just too doting for their own good. Which was usually nice, but not about this, when all their comforts felt fake.

"Y'know, Karai was trapped in another dimension for, like, 500 years." Leon continued, nervously pattering his hand against his own leg. "She… sacrificed herself for her family. Turned herself into the ultimate weapon to stop Shredder from terrorizing the world, and then… It's so absolutely awesome that she was able to do that! But then my brothers and I messed it up. We opened up a portal to tug her through, but… Shredder escaped with her."

Leonardo raised a brow, tempting Leon onwards. Leon wasn't sure if he wanted to say anything else, but he soldiered on anyway. "She and I certainly weren't… best friends. Like you and Karai were. Are! Like you guys are. Apparently. But we didn't bond. She was only alive for an hour or so. And then Shredder found us and killed her, but her ghost helped us beat Shredder, and now–"

"She's not showing up."

"Yeah." Leon agreed, quietly. "I mean, I can't blame her! I mean, maybe if it were any of my brothers, I would be a bit angrier, but not when it comes to me."

"Why?" Leonardo asked, voice gentle reaching out to tug an arm over his shoulder.

"...Don't worry about it." Leon dismissed, heart thudding away in his chest. He knew exactly why Gram-Gram didn't want to help him. She was impressed by Donnie's technology, and Raph's combination of nimbleness and strength, and Mikey's impressive artistic skills, depicting them as such a close family unit. Mikey even managed to redeem Draxum, he got Splinter and Draxum to at very least respect one another and be able to sit passively beside each other.

And then Leon was the fool who got her killed.

Leonardo was still staring at Leon, wide-eyed and worried, when Leon looked back up. His gaze shifted, searching Leon's eyes, a pitying expression on his face that Leon hated. Wasn't that what talking to Leonardo was supposed to avoid? Being faced with that expression?

Whatever, whatever, it didn't matter. Leonardo was just trying to help, and, honestly, it… Ugh, whatever.

"I know I didn't talk a lot about her." Leon said, at long last, looking down at his hands and gently tracing the lines of his left palm with the fingers of his right. "Just like, backstory stuff. But I guess… There's not much to tell aside from that. I mean, I didn't become fast friends with her or whatever like you did. I guess she's not looking out for me as much as your Karai did with you."

Leonardo's arm squeezed gently around Leon's shoulders, reassuring to a fault. Leon smiled slightly at him, shoving into him. "But," Leon continued, "you're here, dude. And we're going to spend this morning making ourselves look super fashionable and then have the rest of the day to figure out how to beat up the demon in my head."

Leonardo snorted, lightly, shaking his head. "That's so weird when you say it like that. But, yeah. Whatever we're doing, I'm– Really, all of us are at your side. We all are."

Ah. And there lies the problem. Because Leon didn't want his brothers at his side. He didn't even think he wanted Leonardo's brothers around, because… it felt too much like having his brothers there. The last thing Leon wanted was to lead his brothers and their counterparts to their deaths because of his own problems.

"Yeah." Leon said quietly, at last, turning his head slightly to eye Leonardo nervously. Leonardo stared at him in return, beyond worried."About that…"

Leon startled as his phone vibrated, and he dug into the side bag squeezed in between him and Leonardo to check the notification. Casey's name starred up at him, followed by bold I AM HERE!

He snorted in amusement, tilting his phone around to show Leonardo Casey's merry text. "Well, I guess we're done with being buddies, our supplier is here."

"Supplier." Leonardo echoed, face going from balk to amused, shaking his head in amusement. "Unless you have ulterior motives, uh, she is only bringing eyeshadow."

"And donuts!"

"Yes, Leon. And… Donuts." Leonardo agreed slowly, shoving himself to his feet and offering Leon a hand up.

Leon laughed at that, allowing Leonardo to pull him up. He didn't actually help, instead leaning backwards and allowing Leonardo to do well over his fair share of work, dragging him up. Halfway up, the tediousness of the situation won out, and Leonardo suddenly let go of Leon, sending him cascading backwards.

Leonardo smiled victoriously as Leon toppled over, the older turtle placing his hands on his hips commandingly.

"Rude!" Leon squawked, glaring up at Leonardo in offense. "I trusted you!"

"And that was your first mistake." Leonardo teased, rolling his eyes with fond exasperation. "Alright, get up." He inclined his head towards the doorway, slowly turning around to head out of the room, hardly glancing over his shoulder as he headed out into the hallway.

Leon glared lightheartedly after him, letting his expression relax into something merry the moment Leonardo was out of sight. He stood up, dusting himself off, and followed after his counterpart.

"So," Leonardo started as Leon jogged up to his side, indiscernibly shifting a step to the side, putting himself closer to the edge of the walkway, glancing down into the center of the atrium.

Leon couldn't see Casey down below, but he expected that Casey was hanging out somewhere already within. He was pleasantly surprised to not hear any ruckus from Casey, as she was the type to enter a silent building, and then scream 'Anyone home?! Casey Jones demands your attention!' He was not only confused, he was actually semi worried.

Oh, wait, Leonardo was talking again.

"How are you going to explain away the eyeshadow? Casey is, actually, the last person I would want to know about it." Leonardo's voice lowered, trying to avoid being overheard by Casey. "It doesn't matter how much makeup he - or she - has, Casey'll tease relentlessly. Casey has no sense of social norms."

"Yeah, at least our brothers' teasing is lighthearted." Leon agreed, twisting around so that he was walking backwards in front of Leonardo, hands tucked behind his head. "But, for real, relax, buddy. I'll just tell Casey that my stripes are makeup! If she tries to make fun of me in front of the fam, it'll just backfire, and she'll just make a fool of herself! And if she tries to make fun of me in private, it'll make no sense because I told her with no shame. It's a win-win situation!"

"Wow." Leonardo balked, staring at Leon with a glimmer of what looked like satisfaction, or perhaps pride, in his eyes. "You're ruthless."

"Ruthless is my middle name!" Leon puffed up, pointing his thumb at his chest with pride.

Leonardo smiled at that, breaking eye contact to roll his eyes. "I thought it was Musashi."

"You are literally so mean to me." Leon deadpanned, exaggeratedly pouting. Then, suddenly, his brain caught up with Leonardo's words and backtracked, trying to make sense of Leonardo's words. "Wait, hold on, what? It's not- whatever you said, my middle name is Kamiizumi!"

"Oh, fascinating. Our father is such a…" Leonardo hesitated, as if weighing how much he could say without being offensive. His face screwed up as they got onto the ramp, and Leon arched an eyebrow, urging him on. "Well, to put it bluntly, he's a nerd. A fanboy."

"Ah, yes, the dimensional constants." Leon mused, turning forward and clamping Leonardo on his shoulder. "Funny what carries over! Like our freaking colors."

"We should've switched mask colors." Leonardo snapped his fingers. "It would've been great."

"Dude, I love you." Leon told him honestly, gaping at him. "If we knew you were coming, I would've gotten my brothers to switch masks. Probably not Donnie, 'cause he can't live without his eyebrows, or the color purple, but the rest of us would've!"

"And it would've been great." Leonardo reassured, chortling at him as they stepped off the ramp and into the atrium.

Casey glanced up from her phone as they entered, and Leon sagged in relief when he spotted her, namely not drawing mustaches on his or Leonardo's brothers. She pushed off the wall, scowling at Leon and completely ignoring Leonardo. "Your 'lair' is too quiet! Last time, you were screaming! What happened to that?!"

"Last time you were trying to kill us." Leon noted, rolling his eyes good-naturedly as he rubbed his hands over his earholes, annoyed by her boisterous taunting.

"And it was glorious!"

"Yeah, yeah, well shhh! Everyone's sleep schedule got screwed, so they're making up for it now, and you're being loud!" Leon shushed her, then allowed his scolding expression to drop, bright and cheerful again.

He hadn't seen her since before Shredder took over his mind, or, rather, since he was made leader, but he remembered that their first - and really only - non-murderous talk was pretty fun, so he had high hopes for this time, too. "But, really!" Leon chirped, reaching out to embrace her in a hug. "It's great to see you again, Cass!"

"Casey." Casey corrected, stopping him in his tracks with a deep glare as she crossed her arms. The grocery and makeup bags she was holding hung limply from between her fingers, swaying lightly. She gave Leon a critical look, giving him a once-over with disdain.

"Casey!" Leon corrected, going in completely for the hug and wrapping his arms around her. His momentary worry that she didn't remember their last conversation with the same excitement that he did vanished as she loosely returned the hug and didn't try to shove him away or, more likely, strangle him.

"It is excellent to see you, as well!" Casey chortled, giving his shell a hard pound that shook his entire body. Geez, he certainly was glad that they weren't enemies anymore. Ow. "Now!" Casey continued, extracting herself from Leon to point an accusing finger at Leonardo. "Who's this?!" Without waiting for a response, she forged on. "Is this your dimensional counterpart?"

Leonardo and Leon stared at her in utter fascination, beyond stumped. How did you…?

Leon shifted from foot to foot, trying to figure out how she had guessed when even Leon and his brothers hadn't. Or maybe his brothers had, but Leon was otherwise distracted trying to… uh, well, kill them. It still didn't make sense how Casey had figured it out. "How'd… Did April tell you?"

Casey tilted back her head and let out a loud burst of laughter that she quickly swallowed, rolling her eyes at Leon and Leonardo shushed her anxiously. "Ha, of course not! The other Caseys and I have family barbecues on alternate Tuesdays!"

Leonardo and Leon exchanged a look, confused and awed, before Leonardo broke concentration to turn back to Casey, hands steepled in front of his mouth. "You what?!"

Casey snorted, rolling her eyes at him. "Don't tell me you fell for that! It was a joke!" She cleared her throat awkwardly, glancing to the side subtly in a way that made Leon unsure if it was really a joke or not. "Obviously."

Leon frowned at her, pursing his lips thoughtfully. "...ooh-kay. Whatever you say, Casey." He clasped his hands together, making his face bright once again. "Anyway, you got it! First try, and all that jazz!"

"Awesome." Casey smirked, rubbing her hands together. She straightened a second later, putting her hands on her hips. "Now, why are you here?"

Leonardo sent Leon a pointed look, his eyes darting between Leon and Casey, inclining his head towards the latter. With all that they had spent yesterday discussing, about secrets and whatnot, Leon wasn't expecting Leonardo to out him, but the older was trying to convince Leon to say something, anyway.

"Oh, uhh, yeah!" Leon agreed nervously, tucking his hands together and slowly rotating on his heel to face Casey. "So… you're never going to believe it, but, uh, funny story!"

It terrified him. Telling her. His own brothers knowing was a sore topic, and to have someone, who he hardly even talked to, know? Not to mention, she had her own vendetta she had against Shredder that she had repeated multiple times hadn't been settled.

The turtles had all crashed in Casey's apartment immediately following Shredder's defeat, and since they hadn't fully trusted her yet, they had taken turns keeping watch. Leon had managed to weasel his way into first watch for that night, with the excuse of adrenaline, and since Casey was, like him, still pumped from their fight, she had chatted his ear off for the better part of the night.

Needless to say, Leon doubted she'd mind her own business if she found out that Shredder was in his head. She'd figure out how to meditate and head in, and no matter how much they enjoyed each other's company, she wouldn't listen to reason. If Leon told her that killing Shredder would kill him, Casey would likely accuse him of stealing her glory.

Which, like fair. If the tables were turned, Leon would think Casey was lying to him, too. He supposed they weren't very trustworthy, in that regard. Too arrogant, or perhaps too eager to prove themselves.

…suddenly, Leon felt less eager to find a like-minded companion, and was struck with the overwhelming urge to get Casey into therapy. Too bad he couldn't convince her without everyone assuming he also needed help, which he totally didn't. He was fine, really! Sometimes his toxic thoughts got overbearing, but that was mostly because they got made worse by Shredder. He was able to handle them just fine before Shredder, and he would be alright after him, too. It was just a thing. He could get over things.

In all, it was safe to say that Casey probably would not be safe to tell.

So, Leon settled back on what he was renowned for, and what got people off his shell more often than hardened their resolve. A joke. "He's here for a family barbecue, what else?"

Leonardo made an undignified noise that was either a snort of amusement or a grunt of annoyance. Leon chose to believe the former and to stubbornly ignore his counterpart's disapproval.

Casey's eyes glimmered at the joke, though, looking thoroughly amused, just like Leon had hoped. There was no room for debate in her expression. "Ha! And the Purple one claims to be the funny one!" She grinned like a mad woman, elated, and then suddenly she was in Leonardo's face, jabbing a finger threatening at the bottom of his chin. He snapped his head up to avoid her nails, and Casey's smile grew. "But I will figure out your secret! You cannot hide from me!"

"Aw, Casey, com'n, cut the dude some slack." Leon huffed, slinging an arm around her shoulders and dragging her backwards, beaming with amusement. "I promise, he's not going to do anything!"

"Famous last words." Casey scowled, barely budging even as Leon drew her back. "And I will tear out your liver and feed it to my children if you touch me again!"

Leon's mind screeched to a dramatic halt, and he lurched to a stop releasing her accidentally. She quickly slithered out of his grasp, glaring at him as she slunk a few steps away. And even though he was utterly confused, he said the first thing that came to his mind. "Oh my gosh, are you pregnant?! Can I be godfather?!"

"Absolutely not!" Casey spat, and Leon honestly couldn't tell which question she was responding to. "I would not trust you with my children if their lives depended on it!"

"Is it twins?!" Leon gasped.

"No! I was referring to the Brownie Cult!" Casey scoffed, jutting her chin in defiance. "Of course I'm not pregnant! I'm a general, I have my priorities in order!"

"Yeah, I'm curious about that." Leonardo noted, squinting at her thoughtfully and completely ignoring Leon's confused ramblings at Casey's shoulder. "Leon said that last time you were here you were trying to kill him. And just now you said you were a general. Were you in the army?"

"Don't be ridiculous!" Casey scoffed, loudly, barely flinching as Leon raised a hand to cover her mouth to shush her but instead slapping it away. "The army wouldn't be able to handle me! I would break them before they broke me! I am all-powerful!"

"Casey, here, used to be part of the Foot Clan." Leon explained, wincing slightly as Casey cast out her first straight above her head and fell into a crouch, a look of victorious glee covering her face. "…love the enthusiasm, Cece, but bring it back a little."

"I would rather die." Casey honestly told him.

Leonardo's face pinched with what could've been confusion, but also, just as easily, could have been his thinking expression. "…Not to beat a dead horse, Leon, but are you sure this isn't Karai?"

"What? Why? Because she…?" Leon thought back over what little Leonardo had explained to him about his own Karai, and nodded. "No, wait, I see where the confusion is coming from. Nope! The one and only Cassandra D. Jones!"

"D?" Leonardo stared.

"Not so one and only anymore!" Casey whooped, giving Leon a hearty thump on the back. "If you can score another blue turtle, so can I! I'm more important!"

"You're really not." Leonardo informed her, an amused quirk to his lips. "I hate to break it to you, really, but I've been to several different dimensions, and you're the first alternate version of Casey I've met."

Casey gasped, putting a hand to her chest as she stared at him. "Slanderous!"

"Anyway, you brought donuts?" Leonardo noted, glancing down at the grocery bag in Casey's hands.

"Hey, yeah, why did you bring donuts?" Leon agreed, peering into the bag as Casey held it open for him to see. The packaging was transparent, and Leon caught sight of sixteen donuts divided into four different flavours. The individual types, Leon couldn't help but notice, were he and his brother's favorites. How did she know? "Are you stalking us?"

"Don't be ridiculous!" Casey snorted, shoving the grocery and makeup bag into Leon's arms so that she could cross hers. "O'Neil requested I bring them whenever you were ready! Either when you texted me or three hours from now." She hummed quietly under her breath, rolling her eyes a little. "I was wondering why you wanted them for dinner."

"Are you nocturnal?" Leonardo inquired politely, tipping his head.

"I've been a ninja since I was seven!" Casey bragged proudly.

"Six." Leonardo beamed, reaching out his hand to fist-bump Casey.

"Ha! A kindred soul!" Casey chirped, bumping him enthusiastically back.

Leon smiled at the two of them, grateful that they weren't eying each other suspiciously anymore, puffing out with pride.

Leonardo glanced back at Leon, and an expression Leon hardly was able to recognize danced across his face. It felt similar to a face Raph made, but Leon wasn't quite able to determine when.

"Hey," Leonardo said, turning slowly towards Leon to turn him around, too, giving him a light shove towards the ramp. "Why don't you put the bagels up in the kitchen?"

"Uh." Leon looked over his shoulder, looking from Casey back to Leonardo, confusion wrapping itself tightly in his chest. He wasn't expecting Leonardo to even want to spend a second alone with her. They seemed too different from one another, but Leon supposed, with his family of different personalities, he wasn't one to judge. "Sure, dude, I guess. Just don't, ah, kill each other, alright? I'll be right back down. And, Casey, what do I owe you for the…?"

"Nothing!" Casey reassured, clamping his shoulder. "You're my friend, you may have it for free! Five finger discount!" She ignored their identical mumbles about that being slang for thievery, and proceeded on. "O'Neil owes me for the donuts, though."

Leon grinned at that, shifting the grocery bag into the nook of his elbow, beaming at her. "I like how you think!" He caught Leonardo's face over his shoulder, and noticed it harden a fraction, not enough to be scolding but enough to encourage Leon to move on. Leon gave him a wave and headed off to the ramp, ignoring it when Leonardo took a step closer to Casey to start mumbling something in her ear.

Leon hadn't actually expected Leonardo to talk to Casey. It was like that old cliche of having two friends meet for the first time. Nobody was realistically expecting them to hit it off right away.

Actually, he didn't think they were hitting off. Not really.

It felt more like… Leonardo wanted something.

What he wanted Leon couldn't even begin to decipher. Leon knew it wasn't about Shredder. It couldn't be, because that was Leon's to tell. But it did leave… Oh, everything else.

Maybe he wanted more insight into her… What did she call it? Brownie Cult? Leon wanted to hear about that. What were they? Some… Replacement for the Foot Clan?

The night they stayed in Casey's apartment, Mikey reported that, during his watch - the third shift of the night - that she had headed out for about an hour or so to drag the Foot Lieutenant and Brute over to the hospital. Leon figured that meant she was still in contact with them, at very least. Still cared. A week and a half wasn't nearly enough time to replace them, too, and at this point Leon doubted she even wanted to.

So, who in the world were the Brownie Cult? Just their name, by itself, gave Leon reason to worry. He hoped that Casey was running them instead of being run. After her problems within the Foot Clan, he doubted she'd ever let herself be anything less than a leader.

Oh, who was he kidding? He didn't have the slightest clue why Leonardo wanted to talk to Casey.

Leon set the donuts on the counter, pulling out two donuts of his favorite flavour, switching out the burnt toast on their plates for the donuts. After a second's thought, he shifted the table back to where it belonged, wincing slightly as it thunked against the ground. Without someone else here, all the sounds seemed amplified and he became hyper aware of his sleeping brothers along the same floor.

He knew that, with Leonardo, they had been much louder, and he bet Leonardo's brothers down below were lighter sleepers and probably woke up the moment Casey opened her mouth, so whatever damage could've been done would've already happened.

He was still worried, for whatever reason.

Leon sniffed the air, glancing down at the burned toast in the trash, and knew Mikey was going to kill him. This is what he got for defying his lifetime ban…

Oh, well.

Leon stubbornly refused to take out the trash until it was absolutely full, not wanting to do extra work rather than any… responsible reason, so he guessed he had to suffer at the hands of his little brother. Better Mikey than a dream demon, was he right?

Leon held up his hand, waited a few seconds, and then high-fived himself. Score one for Neon Leon!

Oh, heck, was that why everyone called him 'Leon'? Honestly, he could get it.

Leon huffed out a breath of laughter, putting on some water to boil for him and Leonardo to have tea later, and determined now was as good a time as any to head back down to join Leonardo and Casey.

As he left the kitchen, as a second thought, Leon shoved the makeup bag into a drawer. Just in case his brothers - or Leonardo's - came in. At this point, he was certain they were all sleeping like the dead, but he didn't want to risk it.

Walking back downstairs - and absent-mindedly hoping that they were done, it better have been a short conversation - Leon's mind drifted.

Back to Shredder, because of course it did.

His claws sliced through the air, an inch from missing Leon's face, only saved by Raph's fist slamming into Shredder. But he wasn't safe, because Shredder was back within the next second.

Fire danced across his body and Mikey's voice screeched as Leon screamed, and burns criss-crossed over his body, but Shredder's body was markless, and he seemed that much more indestructible.

And then Shredder, not trying to kill him, but towering over him regardless, watching him with such disdain that Leon felt like a child, wilting under his parent's glare.

And it hurt to think about. It was dangerous to be the one hunted.

Leon wouldn't wish this on his brothers. He didn't want his brothers to be in the same position he had been in for, what, a week? It scared him, more than anything, to imagine his brothers in his position. Maybe he shouldn't have told them.

…Wait, he hadn't told them anything.

They had figured it out all on their own once their counterparts arrived.

If Leon had been a better actor… If he had faked how he was really feeling a bit better… If he had handled leadership with more grace…

No, what was he thinking?

He was so, so grateful his brothers were on his side. They were here, and that mattered so much. He was glad they had figured it out, but… But.

He didn't want them in his mind anymore.

Leon didn't want them anywhere near Shredder. He would eat his kumquats ahead of time, before their effects burned off and left him lashing out. He might try some more meditation, if one of the older turtles showed him how. And, finally and most importantly, Leon needed to get them out of his mind.

If they truly got hurt, or if they died…

Leon could never forgive himself.

He wondered if he could get Leonardo on his side in this. Figure out some way to keep his brothers out of his mind. Maybe, Leonardo would get his own brothers to leave.

Leon didn't mind one way or another if Raphael and Michelangelo were there, but since their efforts from here on would probably be focused more on evading the attack, he wasn't sure how helpful they'd be. Heck, maybe even Leonardo wouldn't want to come anymore.

Though that thought made Leon feel more than a little afraid. He didn't want his brothers in tere, but he certainly didn't want to be alone. As long as he had one person there for him, instead of against him, he'd be happy, and he'd feel safe.

As Leon entered the atrium, he dismissed all thoughts of Shredder to the best of his ability. Instead, he focused on Casey and Leonardo. The two ninjas were sitting only a few feet away from each other. Casey was scrolling busily through her phone while Leonardo sorted through a pile of knives in front of him.

Where did he keep them?

Leon went to join them, sitting down across from Leonardo, leaning forward, elbow resting on his crossed knees, admiring the blades stretched out between them. "So," Leon chirped when neither Leonardo nor Casey glanced at him. "What'd you guys talk about?"

"It's a mystery." Leonardo told him, his tone carefully mastered to sound disinterested.

"Nobody knows!" Casey guffawed, sparing a glance up to smirk at him. As Leon stuck out his tongue at her, she returned the favour before returning to her phone.

"Are you okay?" Leonardo asked, leaning forward slightly and lowering his voice, regarding Leon with narrowed eyes. "You look out of it."

"There's a lot on my mind." Leon dismissed, rolling forward on his heels and raising his eyebridges. "I'll… Talk to you about it later, okay?"

Casey looked over, twisting one eyebrow up, and then she was tucking her phone away into a side pocket and pulling herself to her feet. "I am going to the hospital now! For my senseis! It was good meeting you!" She reported, launching into a deep bow towards Leonardo and a slightly taller one for Leon.

She glanced between the two of them for a moment, then flashed one of her most crazed smiles against Leon. "If you need anything, just text me! I'm awake whenever you are!"

"Yeah, yeah, you're in my walls." Leon teased, tipping his head as far back as it could go to grin up at Casey. "Thanks for popping over."

"Anything for Lou Jitsu's son!" Casey chortled, ignoring Leonardo's confusion as she crouched directly behind Leon and slung an arm around his neck and dragged him close against her. It was a grand show of pulling him out of Leonardo's earshot, even though both he and Casey knew the older turtle could still hear them just fine.

"Between you and me," she hissed into his ear hole, and from Leon's angle, he could briefly see Casey watching Leonardo. "If you ever need anywhere to stay, you know where I live and where my spare keys are!"

"I don't know where your spare keys are." Leon stage whispered back, grinning up at her innocently.

"It's code for 'come in the window'! Clearly!" Casey scoffed, releasing him and giving up on their 'conspirator' act. "Whatever, and good luck!" Then she turned and marched away, paying no heed to her volume.

Leonardo and Leon watched her go, and then Leon choked out an amused giggle that Leonardo responded to with a grin.

"I don't think she's been a ninja since she was seven." Leonardo admitted, leaning forward to hiss into Leon's ear despite Casey being long out of earshot. "Being quiet should be second nature at this point!"

"She's usually very quiet." Leon smiled right back. "But I think she likes moving like Raph even though she's only, like, a quarter of his size. She sounds like a stampede sometimes!"

Leonardo let out a breathless wheeze that he choked back before it became a full-out laugh, the corners of his eyes crinkling. He turned his attention back to the knives, rewrapping some of them and slipping his others into some of his wrappings and hiding places Leon had never noticed before.

Ah, so that was where he kept them.

Leon was going to have to get Leonardo to show him how to hide them. Then he could freak all his brothers out by pulling weapons out of seemingly nowhere. Or, better yet, he could use them against Shredder. If he broke one sword, he could whip out a knife to fight with, instead.

"Alright, all packed up." Leonardo said at last, patting his knees once he slipped the last knife away between one of his side pouches and his skin, hidden from view. "Now, eye shadow?"

"Shell yeah!" Leon enthused, jumping up to his feet and offering Leonardo an overeager hand up, which Leonardo accepted. Unlike Leon, Leonardo did not drag his feet and pushed himself up at the same time, jerking slightly to regain his footing once he was at his full height.

Leon was once again hit with the truth that Leonardo was shorter than he was, and he fought to keep his mouth from quirking in amusement. Guess he wouldn't be looking up to Leonardo as much as he expected, haha, zing!

Leonardo pulled past him and started walking towards the ramp. Leon had to hurry to keep up, bounding after his counterpart with anticipation. With their steps quick and precise, matching in stride and speed, they reached the kitchen in record time with hardly any words exchanged.

Leon checked on the water on the stove, elated to find it boiling but not yet whistling, taking it off the burner and pulling two mugs out of the cupboard. Leonardo found the tea boxes with little to no difficulty, and pulled a few boxes out and onto the counter. He pulled out green tea and ripped open one packet to deposit the tea into his mug. Leonardo offered the box to Leon as he started to gather up the other boxes into his arms to put them all back into place.

"Ooh, thanks, but I'm not much of a green tea kind of guy." Leon admitted, glancing down at the box in his hand and then the packages in Leonardo's grasp. He located one of the teas he liked, and switched out the boxes, giving Leonardo the go-ahead nod to put the rest away. "I'm actually more into chamomile."

"Fair." Leonardo allowed, waiting to close the cupboard until Leon put away the chamomile box. He gave his mug a slight stir, heading over to the plate on the far side of the table to set his mug down beside it. "This extra donut for me?"

"Yup," Leon reassured as he dunked his tea bag into the water, wincing ever so slightly as a realization occurred to him. "You don't need to eat it, though. If you like different flavored donuts then glazed, we have a selection to choose from."

"No, it's perfect." Leonardo promised, sending him a grateful smile. "Thank you."

"Yeah, of course!" Leon waved a hand dismissively, returning his attention back to his own plate, and Leonardo did the same. They lapsed into silence for several minutes, and Leon wasn't sure if it was because they were enjoying their breakfast or enjoying each other's company, but he was content to claim it was both.

After a few moments, Leon remembered his earlier question. He wasn't sure if he'd get the same response as previously, but he wanted to ask, anyway. "So," he mused, leaning over the table and stretching his mug out in front of him to avoid it spilling over the table. "What were you actually talking to Casey about?"

"Oh, yes." Leonardo sipped his tea slowly, eyebridges raised in mirth. He carefully set down his cup, breathing out a sigh as he also balanced his weight on the table. "I just told her the same thing I told Raphael's Casey."

Leon glowered sarcastically at Leonardo, sticking out his tongue. "I hope you know how little that clears things up, you jerk."

Leonardo smiled, shaking his head. "I told Casey that, as grateful as I am that you two are friends, she better actually be looking out for you. You deserve a good friend, and that better be her, or else." He pushed back again, scooping up his tea again and smiling at Leon around the rim. "That's the basics of it, anyway."

"Huh." Leon hummed at Leonardo thoughtfully. "That sounds a lot like the 'So, you're dating my sister' speech that a bunch of big brothers do."

"Yeah." Leonardo agreed, nodding. "It's important to do it with friends, too, I think. Especially when you're us. If our friends aren't trustworthy, or coerced into silence, then what's stopping them from telling everyone our secret?"

"I… Didn't think about that." Leon agreed, fingers clenching around his mug. "Most of our friends are… Well, we don't have a lot, but it's like… Yokai or other mutants, so we've never had that issue. And April would never betray us, so I guess I didn't consider…" Leon perked up, shifting so that he caught Leonardo's eye. "Wait. Did you have to have this talk with April? Especially when she, ah, started dating… Um. Donatello? Oh, that sounds weird to say."

Leonardo shook his head, his grin wide enough to almost split his face in half. "No, we trust April, too. She's always been careful not to break Donatello's heart, and managed to let Casey down gently when she eventually chose Donnie. She's accidentally upset both of them before, of course, but she's great at fixing it afterwards. Maybe in confusing ways, yes, but she did it."

"Good." Leon hummed thoughtfully. He knew his April would break anyone's heart without hesitation, but knowing that at very least she was gentle with Donnie - well, Donatello, specifically - made his heart warm with joy.

"Now, the friend-speech for April was actually done by Master Splinter, I had no part of it." Leonardo continued, tapping his chin. "Actually, mostly, Master Splinter has been the one to threaten our friends. I only did our Casey because he would've passed out within four words if Master Splinter was doing it."

"Oh? Why's that?" Leon blinked, sensing a story and opening his mental blackmail folder.

"Our Casey's scared of rats."

Leon stared at Leonardo in shock, and Leonardo looked back with an expression that said he was expecting this reaction and found it amusing.

"What." Was all Leon to bring himself to say before the absurdity of the situation hit him. His Casey had only joined their side because Splinter had made such an impression on her, and had been her friend. To imagine any Casey, anywhere, being scared of rats when Splinter had played such a big part in this Casey's life, was absolutely ridiculous.

As Leon burst into barely contained laughter, trying to muffle his giggles with his hands, Leonardo hid his smile rapidly in his mug. The two counterparts watched each other with open amusement, and while Leon was sure Leonardo's joy was for a different reason entirely, it still felt good.

"Oh goodness," Leon chuckled once he got his breath back, beaming in amusement. "And Splinter's just-! Such a big rat! Oh goodness, poor guy!"

"No, no, it's worse than that." Leonardo corrected, spreading his hands out in front of him. "Picture this. Okay, your Splinter's pretty big as far as rat's go, yeah, that would be a problem, but, please, humor me. Imagine an over-six-foot-tall rat. And now imagine Casey entering our lair for the first time without being warned."

"Oh no."

"Oh yes."

"Did he ever get over it?!" Leon asked, eyes screwing together. How much information could he get out of this, and how much could he tease Casey over? Wow, was he ever glad that gossip didn't count as spilling each other's secrets.

"I don't think he ever did. He spent pretty much every second around us staying as far away from Master Splinter as he could get. I think Master Splinter was grateful for that. He offered to teach Casey ninjitsu, sure, but he definitely didn't want to have anything to do with Casey."

"You're kidding." Leon balked, eyes widening. "Our Casey and Splinter get along great! So, so, wait, not only is Casey afraid of Splinter, but Splinter doesn't like Casey?"

"Oh, absolutely not. I don't think any of us liked Casey at first! One Raphael was enough, thanks." Leonardo smirked, sipping at his tea. He glanced up at Leon's confused expression, and hurried to explain. "Well, your Casey isn't much like Raph. She's much more… fierce? She's excitable, and, I didn't think I'd ever say this, but Raph is pretty calm. I think I've only seen him lose his temper once, which is really odd. When we were his age, Raphael was a lot more unstable. I think we all were. It's impressive, really."

"He grew up too fast." Leon muttered, stuffing half his donut into his mouth before Leonardo could ask for clarification.

Leonardo's visage conveyed his understanding, and Leon realized with surprise, and slight horror, that Raph and Leonardo, being the oldest, were often in the same positions. From what he could tell, Leonardo and his brothers' Master Splinter wasn't as distant as Leon's Splinter had been in their youth. However, Leon didn't doubt that Leonardo had still been put in a position of responsibility over his brothers, too.

Leon was glad that wasn't him. He would've led his brothers to their deaths! At least his brothers were smart, now. Now that Leon was made leader, at least they could choose not to follow him.

That thought still hurt quite a bit, though, and it made Leon's hands tighten over his knees as he stared down at his plate, still chewing and trying to avoid Leonardo's eyes. He didn't want to see the emptiness in Leonardo's eyes.

Leonardo didn't necessarily meet his, either, though definitely wasn't outright trying to avoid eye contact.

They remained silent for the next few minutes, finishing off their breakfast. Once they were done, Leonardo collected the plates and mugs, stacking them up and placing them in the sink temporarily. Leon opened up the drawer to retrieve the makeup bag, unzipped it and spilled the contents, an eyeshadow kit and several different brushes, onto the counter.

As Leonardo pulled out a chair so that he could sit down and face Leon, Leon took a moment to steel himself and erase any of his pity that he was certain would be showing on his face. He wasn't sure if it was sorrow over the situation Leonardo and Raph found themselves in, or self-pity, and he certainly wasn't willing to be asked about it.

Leon found himself momentarily balking at the various shades of red within the eyeshadow kit, trying to locate the brightest shade of red that he could. Leonardo fidgeted slightly, keeping his head tilted up as Leon dipped the thinnest makeup brush into the chosen eyeshadow color.

"This is weird." Leonardo admitted slowly as Leon approached, the former tucking his fingers along the underside of the chair and squeezing. "Last time anyone really touched my face, it was Master Splinter."

"And here I thought you were supposed to be my dad." Leon teased, managing to draw a small smile from Leonardo. "I mean, like, dude, you already did my eyeliner, and I never had that with Papa, but you did."

"Carrying on the tradition." Leonardo mused as Leon carefully traced a line from the point of Leonardo's eyeliner up into a sharp angel and then back down to the corner of Leonardo's eye.

Leon noticed a thin scar, crawling up Leonardo's opposite eye, his right one, looking pretty ugly. "Hey, uh, where'd you get this scar?" He asked, thinking about how badly it would affect him if he had an eye scar. His face was his pride and joy, and if it was malformed in any way… If it had any irregularities…

"It's a funny story." Leonardo dismissed, sitting impossibly still as Leon smoothed out the lines as best he could. "It's also one of the reasons I'm banned from making anything. We were, um, roughhousing in the kitchen last year. Using ladles and spatulas and whatever we could get our hands on to fence. Mikey threw a spoon at me, and I dodged. …right into the toaster."

Leon had to pull away to stop himself from messing up the eyeshadow with his laughter, ducking his head. "Dude!"

"I know! I had to spend a few days walking around with a bandage over my eye, and couldn't leap off of buildings because I didn't have depth perception, but it healed quickly. My eye isn't damaged or anything, it mostly got my eyelid." Leonardo reassured, wringing his hands together.

"Okay, good." Leon laughed lightly, trying not to sound as troubled as it was making him, and resumed painting on the eyeshadow. He dabbed at the top of the markings he had already made, trying to make it sharper than it had been previously.

Underneath his fingers, Leonardo twitched. "Remember-!" Leonardo warned.

"-keep it under your mask, I know, I know!" Leon dismissed, lowering himself into a crouch to get underneath Leonardo's eye and gently drawing a triangle over the older's eyebags. "Good thing, too. This is so messy."

"We'll work on perfecting it." Leonardo promised.

"I mean, sure, we can." Leon nodded, moving onto the other eye. "But I don't think you guys are going to be staying very long. Donnie probably is going to pull a brain muscle from all his research, but he'll figure something out."

"Things aren't going smoothly, anymore." Leonardo deadpanned, raising the eyebridge that Leon wasn't currently invested in with a scolding look. "You know that. There's too much going on, with not enough information. We're here for the long haul." At Leon's expression, he elaborated. "At least a week, if I had to guess. Good old turtle luck."

"Yeah, I keep forgetting 'bout that." Leonardo conceded with a cringe.

"But even if we defeat Shredder quickly, and don't need to stay," Leonardo hesitated, lifting his hands to thumb them together anxiously, "I'm now your sensei. I promised I'd train you. Of course, I'll have to ask Donatello about the specifics, make sure the open rift doesn't have any unforeseen complications, but even if we have to move heaven and earth to visit you all, we will."

"That's… surprisingly sweet, dude." Leon blinked at Leonardo, caught off guard. He had sort of assumed that once they finished their business here, once Shredder was gone forever, that they'd go home, and that'd be it.

Just like Karai.

The fact that they were staying, that Leon and his brothers could keep their extended family, made Leon feel warm inside, and he brightened. The older turtles had, for the most part, been attributing their presence to responsibility, and while Leon supposed Leonardo still was, it felt… different, somehow.

It was… nice.

He felt loved.

He had been feeling loved a lot more lately than he had been in his entire life, and it was… So confusing.

Don't.

Don't, he scolded himself, straightening up to start shading in the triangles above Leonardo's eyes. He schooled his expression into something more calm as their gazes met, making sure to remove any reason for Leonardo to worry. Don't make a big deal about it, it's just a thing. Sure, it's overwhelming, but isn't it better than being hated?

Leon hid his pinched expression behind a smile that he hoped appeared more relaxed than tense, and finished fading in Leonardo's eyeshadow. It looked more like rough splotches of paint than anything like Leon's markings. Instead of light triangles dusted across Leonardo's eyes, or even like crescent moons on either side of his face, they looked like muddied blobs of shapes.

Leon would get better at this. Leonardo had promised he would, and Leon was going to be trying his best to get better.

"What's on your mind?" Leonardo pressed, looking up at Leon as his brow creased in worry.

Leon hesitated, then remembered his earlier thoughts. Well, that was something he really did have to tell Leonardo at some point. No time like the present, and it would eliminate all other questions about his mental state. Avoiding a conversation about how Leon was so unused to actually having such evident love directed at him.

Not due to lack of effort, because he knew his brothers loved him and tried to show it, but sometimes it just felt like… Well, Leon certainly felt like the least favorite of his brothers, not just of Splinter. It was an upsetting feeling, sure, but at least it was wholly and truly fake.

Leon had learned that just yesterday.

"Well, sensei," Leon winked with farce bravado that Leonardo didn't look like he believed for a second. Leon deflated at the expression he was given, rubbing the back of his neck awkwardly. "Okay. Look. There's just been, ah, something on my mind lately."

Leonardo shifted forward, tucking one leg under his other. He put one fist under his chin and extended his opposite hand towards the chair beside him. His smile was smug, but inviting, and Leon found himself pulling out the chair rapidly to face Leonardo's.

As the younger took a seat, Leonardo fell into a more relaxed position. "Now," the older implored, "What's wrong?"

"Nothing's… 'wrong', so to speak." Leon countered, stifling a groan as he tried to process his own emotions. "It's just that I…" He took in Leonardo's expectant expression, and summoned the courage to continue, not wanting to leave Leonardo bemused if he couldn't explain. "Okay. So, I'm not comfortable with- Wait, no, no. It's not that I'm uncomfortable, it's just that I hate it when…" Leon hesitated, fingers grasping at the air unconsciously while he struggled to find the correct wording. In the end, whatever he planned to say came out in a rush, not even stopping for a breath. "Idon'tlikemybrothersbeinginmyhead."

Leonardo blinked in silent surprise, trying to process the words, and then his face melted into something gentle, understanding in his gaze. Leon's chest swelled from the reassuring look he was given, shifting forward, eager to hear his counterpart's insight.

"My father used to say that 'being a leader is like being a bodyguard. A bodyguard's duty is not to bring their charge out of danger, but rather to predict dangerous situations and avoid them. Never lead your brothers into peril if at all possible'."

"Oh." Leon narrowed his eyes, squinting blankly at the space in front of him. It felt like one of those things that didn't actually contain the true answer in the text. One of those weird proverbs where you couldn't just listen to the words, but had to figure out what they meant, and how they applied, and everything else.

Dangit, Leonardo, couldn't he be one of those straightforward teachers?

Okay, first of all, was the situation avoidable? Yeah, for Leon's brothers. For Leon himself? Not at all. Unfortunately enough, as long as Leon was under Shredder's influence, his brothers would be there, too. If one of Leon's brothers was suffering with this whole situation, Leon would probably be the first one throwing out ideas on how to fix it, good and bad alike. He couldn't exactly be a hypocrite.

When it came down to it…

"So, what you're saying is," Leon struggled, floundering about. "I can't avoid it. My brothers have gotta be there."

"What? No, absolutely not." Leonardo balked first, then followed up with a disbelieving scoff. He even had the audacity to look half offended at Leon's conclusion. "As a leader, there are sacrifices we must make. For our brothers, and for the greater good. My brothers aren't happy about that philosophy, and I'm sure yours won't be, either. Wow, Mikey's going to be furious… Anyway, you don't have to-"

"Wait, what was that? What about Mikey?" Leon leaned towards his counterpart, attentively perking up to his brother's name drop and highly doubting that Leonardo meant Michelangelo. "You two talked yesterday, right?"

Leonardo nodded and held up to two fingers. "Twice."

"Twice?!" Leon echoed, throwing up his hands. "What the shell did you two talk about?!"

"He thinks I'm a bad example."

"What?!"

"No, no, he's right." Leonardo countered as he held up his hand to stop Leon's outbreak. "Leon, I literally just told you that it's for the best that your brothers don't go into your mind anymore."

"They could die!"

"I'm not arguing that!" Leonardo agreed enthusiastically, nodding along. "Honestly, I think it's a great idea. It makes sense, and you're protecting them from danger. So, kudos to you. Did I use that right?" At Leon's nod, he proceeded. "But they're going to kill you before Shredder gets the chance. They're going to be furious. Do you know what you're going to say to them?"

Leon blue-screened, his thoughts messily tumbling together as he tried to figure that out. All that he could string together was that Leonardo - or, rather, Mikey - was right. Leonardo probably wasn't the best example of what he should or shouldn't be doing in terms of his brothers.

"They're going to kill me." Was all Leon's expertly paced mind could put together.

"Already said that. Thanks for contributing." Leonardo deadpanned, adopting another one of Heuso's famous expressions, this one reeking of 'Thank you, Captain Obvious'.

"Well, what about you?"

"What about me?" Leonardo flashed back, eyebridges furrowing. Before Leon could even open his mouth to explain, horror crossed Leonardo's face and his back went ramrod straight, hands clutching into fists. "Wait, do you not want me there, either?"

"Of course not!" Leon argued, throwing his hands between them desperately. "Or. Of course I do…? Man, I dunno, I just know that I'm okay with you in my head. It's just my brothers who I want to keep away. And I…" Leon paused, bringing his hands back to his chest, twitching them anxiously together, nibbling his lip. "It's up to you. Whether your brothers are there or not. It's not my decision, dude."

"Well, what's your plan, here?" Leonardo asked, thankfully not sounded like he was trying to challenge Leon's ideas. His brothers would do that, on occasion, during stressful situations or missions, that Leon knew it was enough insensitive to make him shut down entirely. "What do you think is a good idea?"

"It's not much of a plan." Leon admitted, scooting his chair forward a few inches until their knees were touching. Leonardo jerked a bit in surprise, but relaxed before Leon could scoot back, even holding out a hand to stop Leon from fleeing. Leon waited for a second before continuing, looking down to their legs, letting his gaze zone out and absently watched their two shades of green intermingle. "Just a couple observations."

"I'm all metaphorical ears." Leonardo invited from above Leon, his voice gaining a touch of amusement. "Whatever you have in mind, I'm here to listen."

"Okay, so, I'm realizing that the only time that our brothers would come in handy is when we're attacking Shredder or trying to run a test or something, because, y'know, they keep Shredder distracted. But, they can't actually hurt Shredder without hurting me, and, like, that's frustrating for all parties involved, but especially me." Leon did jazz hands without raising his head, directing his palms towards the ground as he did. Leonardo hummed lightly above him, and Leon slowly lowered his hands again. "So, like, I guess some of this is ego. Yaaaaay..."

"I don't think it's much of an ego, and more of self-preservation. Which is good to have! In my family, if any of us had that attribute, that'd immediately single them out as the black sheep."

Leon breathed out a light laugh, shaking his head. "Alright, cool, then. Glad I have a little bit of that, then! But, really, yeah, that's… part of the reason I don't want anybody there who isn't necessary, y'know? It's just a lot of pain and fighting for something that doesn't even matter."

"We thought it mattered." Leonardo said, sounding more sullen than Leon had expected him to, even with the slight edge on his voice that warned Leon against blaming Leonardo's brothers. "We wouldn't have hurt you for no reason. We wouldn't have hurt you at all if it wasn't for Shredder."

"Naw, I know." Leon dismissed rapidly, shaking his head. "Just, ah, one of those things. But, like, for real, though, we already know we can't lay a finger on Shredhead. Or, at least, you guys can't, since I'm pretty sure I still can. But, uh, you guys still have a couple candles left, but I'm guessing there's not enough for me to sleep through every night while we try to figure out Shredder. So there's either staying up all night long, or…"

"Facing Shredder." Leonardo finished, his sigh blowing across the top of Leon's face. "One way, we know, doesn't rejuvenate you for the next day, even with the use of micro naps. And those can easily turn into real sleep."

"Exactly. And I don't exactly want to be pinching myself awake every three minutes!"

"So your solution is… to spend the night running for your life from a dream demon while praying it counts as getting a good night's sleep? Might I remind you that you couldn't even escape from him yesterday! You had to manipulate him into thinking you were suicidal until I arrived!"

"So, we'll figure it out!" Leon groaned, finally sitting up to shove his chair back a short distance as he rolled his eyes upwards until they found a fandom spot and focused there instead of at their legs. "Maybe when he first shows up I do some random teleporting mojo to make my way over to him, and then I just shatter my katanas on him."

"Here's an idea." Leonardo offered, donning an expression that portrayed how awful he thought the plan was, but he was still entertaining the thought. "I'll use your katanas. If he tries to teleport, I'll be holding them and can keep him at bay while you try to get some sleep-eye. You can use mi-" Leonardo's words fell short, and his gaze lifted and turned towards his scabbard, staring at his hilts. Whatever he saw there must've carried some value, because he shook his head absently. "No, nevermind."

"Perfectly alright, dude!" Leon reassured, wondering what that was about. "The odachi you brought last time was perfect. I'm more used to it, y'know! Fought with one for almost two years, and she never let me down! Ignoring the first year or so."

"Are you more trained with the odachi?"

"Uh." Leon rubbed the back of his neck awkwardly, gaze slipping to the side. "…it's pretty minimal. I'm more skilled with the katanas, definitely."

"I'm sure I saw some in your armory. They were kids sized, though." Leonardo looked back at Leon, and offered him a sympathetic grin. "We'll figure something out. In the meantime, I can try to train you better with your katanas. I never received formal training on the odachi, so I can't give you instructions."

"Kids sized katanas are a problem, though. Especially when fighting Shredder." Leon agreed, bobbing his head. His curiosity won over, and he dared to venture "What exactly is special about your katanas?"

"Family heirloom. They're the last things Splinter left me, and I don't want to mishandle them. Not saying you would, but… I don't like anyone else using them." Leonardo admitted, left hand going up to grab the hilt of one sword and gently trace the fine wrappings.

"Says the dude who totally just used a scabbard knife to do his eyeliner."

"That's not desecrating! The knife was from my old sword's hilt, it's not an heirloom!"

"I dunno, dude, sounds like desecrating to me…" Leon teased, admiring his nails. "What would your ancestors think? Using an ancient relic to do mundane, everyday stuff like… making tea, and whatnot. Because your swords are… Wait," Leon interrupted himself, struggling to organize his words in a way that made sense, and settled with "Your swords are like Skully!"

"Come again?" Leonardo asked, appropriately stumped.

"Sorry," Leon winced, trying to dismiss it. Leonardo's gaze became more intense, and Leon had to elaborate. "It's just what we called Shredder's mask for a while."

"You called the kuro kabuto 'Skully'." Leonardo echoed, raising his eyebridges in disbelief. "Skully."

"Technically Dad did, and we just picked it up! He didn't know it was Shredder's, either! None of us did."

"Holy chalupa, your whole family doesn't know anything." Leonardo deadpanned, cringing slightly. "That's not important, though. What is important is this plan of yours. Let me try to summarize; unless we're fighting or doing tests, you don't want anyone else there."

"Right, Shredder's only going to chase me. We already know that, so anyone else would just be around for the heck of it."

"Correct. Okay, and you prefer your odachi, despite being more trained with katanas. I could use your katanas, but in order to do that, you need to survive with them long enough to hand them over to me."

"How about this," Leon suggested, "I try to shatter them, but if they're *not* shattered by the time you get in, you can have them. I can go in with my odachi, and just fight with it."

"Shredder's going to be able to get a clear shot to your shell every time he teleports."

"I mean, yeah, but at least I'll know where he's going to be every time he teleports. If I can't see him, turn around. Even without the teleporting, though, that's just common sense. It's a classic!" Leon grinned at Leonardo teasingly, but his grin dropped as Leonardo reached up to run his fingers along two deep gouges along his plastron. Even though they were clearly healed now, it was clear that whatever had inflicted them…

"Don't turn around immediately." Leonardo suggested lightly, avoiding his eyes. "Run as far as you can. If you can. With his teleportation…" His fingers had turned from gently rubbing to full out itching, face pinching with annoyance as his nails dragged along the scars, jaw clenching. "Just… don't let yourself be caught."

"Yeah, of course not." Leon dismissed easily, reaching out to stop Leonardo from scratching. Leonardo sidestepped his hand with a glare, and Leon drew his hand back to his chest uneasily. Leonardo dropped his hand with what appeared to be great effort, a slight wince in his face.

Trauma. Leon kept forgetting just how much their counterparts had gotten prior to meeting Leon and his brothers. Something had been sharp enough, had been strong enough, to slice Leonardo's shell cleanly, the strikes straight and lacking any of the jaggedness that Leon would expect.

And from their conversation…

Leonardo had turned around. It has been a surprise attack, not something he could defend against. Whatever it had been had cut deep, and just the words 'turn around' had been enough for Leonardo to…

Distract. Deflect. Double D, Leon's specialty.

"So, that meditation thing totally worked, right?" Leon asked, pulling his eyes away from Leonardo's chest and towards his face, letting his own expression morph into something relaxed and thoughtful. "The thing in Dad's scroll that let you come into my head quicker?"

"Right, you were distracted." Leonardo murmurednodded, forcing his face into something neutral instead of the pained look he had been carrying. "It did. It worked well."

"Great, that's good news!"

"Yeah, we needed some." Leonardo agreed, not sounding thrilled with the news. Leon guessed he didn't have any time at all to be happy over it, since the second he found out it worked he was forced to fight Shredder, then he confronted Leon about the younger's suicidal-like words, and then…

Well, here they were.

In this case of possession, filled with arguments and fights for their lives, they needed some. In their attempts at good news, it only ended worse than before.

When Leonardo tried to pull Shredder out of Leon, they wound up with Shredder twisted against Leon once again. If there were any consequences to it, either they hadn't come into effect or the turtles just hadn't noticed. If Shredder healing alongside Leon was because of that, then… Well, Leon hated to see what else would happen. If their one chance at getting Shredder out was ruined by Leonardo trying to help, who could tell what else could happen to make the dominoes fall faster?

And then again when they tried to stop Shredder by slicing his neck but only ending up hurting Leon instead twice. Of course, both times, Shredder was hurt, too, yeah, but the stupid healing hands had revived Shredder. Maybe Shredder twisting against Leon made them heal together, too.

They didn't actually know if there had been any consequences to Leonardo trying to essentially perform a solo exorcism on Leon. They didn't know if Shredder had twisted more tightly against Leon at all. They didn't know how closely their souls were intertwined, they didn't know how deep the forced bond ran.

Their souls locked together as bad enough, but if they had managed to make it worse…

Oh, shell, they really needed good news, now. Happy moments stolen at the start of the day, excited conversations, barely contained laughter, and the brief moments of heartfelt conversations all meant nothing.

Leon had thought today had started out good. It was supposed to start out good. He and Leonardo were really becoming friends, instead of hero and victim, or whatever they had been the previous day. Real friends. But that doesn't matter anymore, because good didn't exist. Not in this scenario.

Leonardo was right, with the expression he donned as Leon cheered over the meditation tactic, looking tired and without excitement despite the technique saving Leon's life.

It wasn't good, it was a stupid delay. That was all it was. The best they could do was neutral.

Leon was quieter for much longer than he meant to be, staring at Leonardo in silently building horror. To Leon's surprise, he realized they both were standing. When had they stood up? Just like Leon, Leonardo's eyes were starting to widen, and his eyebridges were pinching together, fear and concentration swirling together in symphony in his expression.

"Leon." Leonardo said, his voice hardening by several octaves, gaining an authority presence that normally Leon would admire but right now, crushed underneath a steadily building presence of hopelessness, felt like just another problem that was laden upon Leon's shoulders.

"I'm fine." Leon said as Leonardo's mouth opened again. His words didn't help to smooth out the crease on Leonardo's forehead. On the contrary, the crevasse seemed to deepen.

"I don't believe that. Com'n, what's on your mind?" Leonardo tempted, nudging him.

"I'm really fine, it's just…" Leon paused, weighing his words in his mind, coming to the realization that there was no good way to word it. "There's nothing we can really do. I'm really grateful you guys are here, I am! It's keeping me alive longer than I thought it would, yeah, and it's totally cool that you're coming quicker than before, but I just…" Leon looked down at his hands, and then backed up at Leonardo's calculating expression. "There's no hope here."

Leonardo's face broke into a look of sorrow, ragged and tired, looking twice his age. Deep canyons appeared between his eyebridges, and Leon felt bad for causing Leonardo so much grief.

"It's only been a day." Leonardo argued, voice quiet and slightly threatening, turning his glare to Leon's chest rather than his face, hands curling into fists. "If we expect everything to play out exactly as it had during our first attempts, then, yes, there's no hope. But it's a learning experience. I can get there faster. And you have your brothers to back you up."

"I don't want my brothers to back me up!" Leon repeated, certain that if he had hair, he would've pulled it out in frustration.

"I know." Leonardo allowed, nodding slowly at Leon's admission, his arms slowly raising to cross over his chest. "And for what it's worth, I think you're right. About wanting to avoid your brothers wanting to get hurt. But, if I can impart some wisdom that my brothers beat into me… It's not your fault. Shredder's not here because of you, so even if your brothers had gotten hurt… Well, we will heal them."

"Of course you're going to heal them!" Leon snapped, pivoting around on his heel to pace away. "If you didn't, do you know how quickly Donnie would kill you?"

"He sure tried." Leonardo agreed, a weak excuse of a joke that Leon quickly remedied with a glare so that Leonardo would know as much.

"Y'know," Leon continued, turning his back on Leonardo to stride away a couple steps. "The healing hands isn't the magical 'fix-all' that you think it is!" He argued, hands falling into clenched fists at either side of his waist. "Even if their injuries didn't transfer over to the real world, I would still have to see them get hurt! They would still feel it!" His voice lowered, suddenly hyper-aware of just how loud he was getting, and casting a nervous look past the track in the tarp out to the walkway before turning back to Leonardo. "…I can't let them be martyrs for me. It's… tyrannical."

Leonardo inhaled sharply through his nose, looking put off by Leon's words but sympathetic all the same. "Okay." The older agreed after a few beats, finally conceding. "I'll help you convince your brothers not to come. And I'll send a couple texts to Karai, April, and maybe Rockwell and Leatherhead. Scientists." He clarified before Leon could voice his confusion "Maybe one of them can find something."

Leon opened his mouth to flash back a snarky retort, something about how they could figure out how to get Shredder out even when Donnie couldn't, but realized what he was doing and thought better of it. Leonardo was trying to help while Leon's mind worked overtime, reading sentences that didn't exist from between the lines. He was finding every negative thing this predicament brought, and let it ruin his life. Shredder was unable to manipulate Leon's emotions, but he still felt like he was under the demon's influence.

He didn't used to be like this.

While all his brothers lost faith and mourned a failed mission, Leon was supposed to be the one who came up with a plan to turn salami into paper and revive his brothers' confidence in themselves. When Raph went missing, Leon was the one who kept his brothers on the move, who inspired hope. Leon was the first one off that cliff, Mikey and Donnie a step behind, and they were all falling, and they were all going to die, but Raph wouldn't be alone when he hit, they would go with him, and-!

The point was that Leon was the positive one. Hope was practically his middle name! Okay, 'Hope' was actually Mikey's middle name, but still!

And he was letting something personal take that from him. How hypocritical.

Leon took a deep breath, summoning what little courage he could, and met Leonardo's gaze spot on. "I'm sorry, I'm being such a dum-dum."

"Maybe a bit." Leonardo winced, but followed it up with a dismissive shrug. "But, I get it. Nothing's going right, and every second we're here is a reminder that Shredder is, too."

"Yeah- Well! No, not… not really." Leon argued, cringing lightly. "I don't think about Shredder as much as I did before you all arrived. I mean, before your Shredder showed, I spent a lot of time thinking about ours– But! Anyway," Leon looked back up at Leonardo. "Today has. Been going right, I mean. I've enjoyed hanging out with you, and Casey's great, but…"

"But…?" Leonardo prompted.

"But you!" Leon gestured at him, trying to keep his eyes off of Leonardo's plastron scars, but his gaze still wandered over to Leonardo's forearm, where a pattern of scars wove around his forearm, looking too much like the the imprints Mikey sometimes got when his chains dug into his skin. Then, he looked back up to his face, once again taking in the scar that slashed over his eye, mostly hidden behind his mask, but cutting deeply into his flesh nonetheless. Sure, his eye scar hadn't come from an actual enemy, and had been a mistake, a mishap between brothers, but knowing it was there…

Was frightening.

"Look at you!" Leon continued, gesturing at Leonardo half-frantically. "You're covered in scars! Way more than I've seen on anyone, not even anime characters or anything! Your shell is… And the way you stand…"

Leonardo paused, then tried to shift so that he was no longer putting most of his weight on his left leg, but he winced regardless as his right leg took half of the burden.

Leon flung out his arms at the switch in position, bristling at the expression Leonardo adopted. "See?!" He let his arms drop a second later with a deep sigh, shaking his head. "Sorry. I guess what's getting to me is the… It's the nerves, y'know? You got your big scars from somewhere, and now I'm facing off against one of your big-bads, and that doesn't help to calm me down!" His hands reached up to touch his own forearm, the scar across it wrapped up and hidden from view, unlike Leonardo's. Healing hands or not, Leon's arm felt like the first of many war wounds he'd receive, and that thought terrified him.

But as long as it wasn't on his face…

He wouldn't be fine with that, not really, but it'd be better than the alternative. If his whole body was scarred and beaten, he could hide it between sweatshirts. If his face though… His most important asset…

He needed to stay the Face Man. He needed his face intact when nothing else could be. Being a leader didn't require his face, but he needed a contingency plan in case he couldn't become a good leader, in case he failed to meet expectations.

"Some of my scars were mistakes." Leonardo said softly, breaking Leon from his spiral. "Others are trophies. Reminders of when I took care of my brothers. Some I hate to see, to be reminded of my own failures, but at least I learned from them. I know they're not ideal. But I don't want them to scare you. Even if you get them… there's lessons to be learned. Facts of life that come with them. Master Splinter told me that, after my… After…"

Leonardo shifted off of his right leg again, and offered Leon a kind yet strained smile. "I was beaten pretty badly when I was sixteen." I wound up in a coma for a couple months, and Master Splinter couldn't be there. I don't remember it well, but after we found him again, everything building up inside me for the months we were at the farmhouse burst out. He helped me through it. Helped Raph through it, too, when he broke a few days later. I think… I think the week after we found Master Splinter again was the toughest for us all."

Leon stared at him, uncertain of what to say. Splinter had always been the best at comforting him and all of his brothers, when they were upset. But he wasn't always around when they needed it most, and it felt like… It seemed like that was universal, even if it sounded like it was for a different reason with their counterparts.

"He took care of us." Leonardo continued, voice gentle and quiet, and his hand continued to rub against his plastron. "When we couldn't, he was there. I'm going to try to repay the favor, for you. Shredder went from being a threat to our father from being a threat against my brothers and I, to now threatening you. We'll fix it. We defeated him once, we'll do it for you. This won't be your burden to carry for much longer, okay?"

Leon stared at Leonardo for a beat longer, then nodded numbly, ducking his head. "Okay. Okay. I just… I don't…"

"And it'll never be your brothers' burden." Leonardo added at Leon's stumbling, drawing a relaxed hum out of Leon. "I'm here, okay? All of us are, and we'll defeat Shredder and get you out of this."

"Thank you." Leon whined, reaching out to take Leonardo's hand and squeezing as best as he was able. Leonardo squeezed back, and Leon tried to rid his mind of the twisted scars that ran up and down Leonardo's chest and arms, and Leon ignored the mental image of his face being beaten in, or the tiny clawed scratches along the back of his own head. They were hidden under his mask, and he didn't have to worry about them, he didn't, he didn't.

The other turtles were here. And they would keep him safe.