"Bronn's….dead?" Asked Jaime, confused. "How?"

"When he started hurrying off Sheila ran to him to reassure him that there was no need to be afraid," said Tormund.

"Yeah, I'm sure that's why she was running towards him," said Jaime dryly.

"What are you implying?" Demanded Tormund, raising a fist.

Brienne got between the two. "Jaime's just upset, please excuse him." She turned towards Jaime. "I saw it all. I can't say I know what Sheila's intent was, but when she was almost to him Bronn draw his sword. After that, well, Sheila had to defend herself."

"Have you gone mad?" Jaime asked. "It's a fucking bear. It doesn't have a name. And it wasn't approaching for a fucking hug."

"He's so fucking disrespectful! Brienne, let me slap him silly," said Tormund.

"No, he will be leaving soon anyway," she replied.

"Back to his sister?" Asked Tormund, already knowing the answer.

"Yes. Back to Cersei. And away from this madness," said Jaime.

"Did you fuck Brienne?" Tormund asked suddenly.

"I did. But after it, she told me you already took her maidenhead. So I'm not obligated to stay," said Jaime.

"Well, you can't leave yet! In wildling culture, we have a tradition. You pull your dick out and I'll pull mine out and we'll stand side by side, dick by dick. It is known that whoever has the bigger one can satisfy the woman more, and so she shall be theirs," said Tormund.

"I don't want her. So don't worry bout that," he said, adding, "No offense Brienne." He gave them both a long look. "Best of luck, you two. I'll be leaving now." He tried to move past Tormund, but Tormund put a hand on his shoulder and blocked the path.

"Well, fine, you can leave in a bit. Our culture still dictates that you gotta pull it out. After that, you can forfeit to me," said Tormund.

"Seven hells. I am not gonna pull my cock out just to prove my mine's bigger!"

"You mock my Sheila, and now my culture?" said Tormund.

"Jaime, just do it," said Brienne.

Jaime sighed wearily. "Seven fucking hells. Fine. Let's get this over with." He untied his robe and pulled his breeches down. His small member hung limp at its side as he waited for Tormund to do the same.

Tormund started laughing uncontrollably. "Oh. My. Gods. I…I…" He was laughing so much that he kneeled over. He started crying as he shook with laughter.

"What the fuck is so funny?" Asked Jaime. Suddenly feeling very insecure about his manhood he covered it with his hands.

Tormund was down on the floor now, literally rolling on the floor laughing his ass off.

"Why is he laughing?" Jaime asked Brienne.

"I don't know. Tormund?" She asked.

They had to wait several minutes until Tormund's laughter died down.

"I was just fucking with you, boy! Dick size has nothing to do with how well you can please a lady. Why, Jon Snow is barely three inches and I can hear the Dragon Queen's screams of pleasure in my chambers, and my chambers ain't even that close to theirs."

"You humiliated me!" said Jaime, pulling up his breeches, wondering why he hadn't done so sooner.

Serves you right for believing we'd have such a tradition. What do you think we are, savages?"

'Yes.' Jaime wanted to say, but that would only further delay things. He needed to get back to his chambers, take a piss, and pack some ragged clothes and moldy bread for his journey. He turned towards Brienne before taking his leave.

"I guess this is goodbye," he said.

She nodded. "I guess so. I wanted you and only you for so long. But, Jaime, our night together, and the next morning. There was no love there. At all. Not from you anyway. You seemed a million miles away."

"I am sorry. I hope you will be able to find happiness."

She nodded at him but looked past him to Tormund. "I…I think I will…possiblly….if…"

"Good. I want you to be happy." He turned towards Tormund. "If you two are giving things a go, you had better treat her right." He turned back to Brienne. "I'd offer to write to you…but if Cersei ever found out…."

She nodded in understanding. "That's fine,"

He looked at Tormund. "You though, I could write to you, and Brienne could read it to you and write me back for you."

"Are you implying that I can't read?" Asked Tormund in a dangerous tone.

"You…you can read?" Jaime asked in shock.

"Of course. But I'm not so sure you can," replied Tormund.

"Why do you say that? I might get my letters backward sometime but I can certainly read!" defended Jaime.

"Well, you sure ain't reading the expression on my face right now. Which is saying get out."

"Of course. Of course," said Jaime, looking forlorn.

"I'm just fucking with you boy! Come here," said Tormund.

Before Jaime knew what was happening Tormund drew him in for a hug.

As they hugged Tormund whispered in his ear. "If you ever fuck with my woman again, I'll have to have a piece of that pretty little ass of yours too. Keep that in mind."

One more chapter, an epilogue to see where everyone is in the future.