Thank you to everyone that has followed, favourited, or reviewed.

It turns out a drabble is 100 words or so. I did not know that. These will not be drabbles, if that is the case. Not to mention one-shots are mostly disconnected… I don't think I can write like that.

Don't worry, this is still crack with Obito as Tobi, doing Tobi things in the MHA universe. Fair warning: I suspect angst will find a way to creep in eventually.

Chapter 2: Obito VS. AnimeCon

Careening around the corner like a madman, Obito hobbled and ran as though drunk until he finally caught sight of what was surely the 'enemy con'.

Keeping a hold on his malicious chakra, he expanded his senses, searching for those with strong chakra.

No ninja could hide for long from a sensory ninja with mal-intent.

As he did, he slowly ambled closer, taking in his surroundings to find potential hiding places or places of escape. Currently, he was on another flat surface. Most likely it was some kind of path, given how people seemed to use this one.

It was not so dark as the one that was in front of him, the one those metal boxes were so fond of using. Over the road in front of him were white horizontal stripes. Short metal poles came up from the ground on the sides of the smoother surfaces, creating a barrier of sorts between the two on both sides. Their placement was odd, such that they could not possibly stop even a civilian. There was one taller, thinner metal pole on the other side, and at one end it had a glowing red hand. There were no metal boxes in sight.

Do they form some sort of barrier technique?

He had stopped right in front of a row of the shorter poles, unwilling to proceed. For all he knew, they caused instant death upon being crossed. Clearly, there was some sort of pattern one had to follow in order to cross safely. Even teleporting across could be dangerous given his lack of information.

Behind his mask his eye narrowed in suspicion.

Studying the white stripes, the short poles, and the tall pole, he saw that they had no chakra. And yet, he was unsure. Suddenly the red hand vanished, replaced instead by a glowing green man, causing the people around him to surge forward, stepping onto the stripes and going over the darker flat surface and onto the other side.

Tobi quickly ran after them.

After his near fatal encounter with the enemy barrier technique, Tobi found himself swarmed by chakra-less people. Stifling his instinct to crucify them all with wood-style, he opted to stay in-character.

"H-hi?" Tobi said shyly, clearly nervous as he fidgeted.

"Holy shit dude! Who are you cosplaying as? Your costume is amazing!" a man dressed in shoddily made equipment asked. He carried what seemed to be a larger version of the Kubikiribōchō.

The main difference was that it was made of some sort of paper.

"Yeah, your mask must have taken ages to make! Did you make everything yourself, or did you get it custom made?" another asked.

"How much would that even cost?" his friend asked, aghast.

"Pika pika," a girl solemnly said. She was wearing a strange sort of yellow all-in-one outfit. They all began to raise strange rectangular boxes and point them at him.

Holding his hands up and taking a slight step backwards, Tobi tried to placate the crowd.

"Er… uhhmmmm… I mean…"

Everyone's eyebrows raised, eager to learn who had made such an amazing costume.

"Lookatthetimetobi'sgottaruuuun!"

And with that, he clumsily barrelled right through them, ignoring their protests.

Obito went through the steps every genin learnt about as far as assassination was concerned, as he munched on some sort of cloudlike candy.

Step 1: Gather information on the target.

Step 2: Confirm your target.

Step 3: Kill your target.

The first had been easy, beyond easy, even. Simply dressing up and acting like an insufferable idiot was enough for most people to lower their guards. Even highly trained shinobi could fall for his act, and clearly, these 'people' were no shinobi. The third was one he was willing and able to follow through with, no matter the target—the competent Uchiha's in Konoha's War Memorial were proof enough of that. Most people had attributed the slaughter of the Uchiha Clan to Itachi. That was only partly true.

Itachi had been the one to slaughter the civilians and some of the combatants, but it was Obito that had utterly annihilated the Uchiha Police Force. Since then, he had only grown in power and in experience. Let it not be said that Obito lacked in power or ruthlessness.

He had an entire arsenal of abilities, not to mention near limitless amounts of perishable and non-perishable supplies stored up in his Kamui dimension—such as kunai, explosive tags, Madara's weapons, spare robes, food, water—anything a shinobi would ever need, really.

His problem lay with the second step: 'Confirm your target'.

He had assumed that this… 'Enemy con' was some sort of secret secondary shinobi alliance, perhaps one aligned against the Akatsuki. Maybe it transcended the prejudices the Hidden Villages all held towards each other.

You can imagine his surprise when instead of a gathering of elite shinobi… well…

Obito was self-aware. He had always been a strange child. Looking back, he would consider his younger self almost unsuited to shinobi life.

These supposed 'enemies' were stranger than anything he could have imagined.

They dressed in weird costumes, putting on off-putting accents and repeating odd lines. Some wore strange animal suits, others wore scanty clothing that could hardly be called shinobi attire—and Obito had seen some very revealing, risque kunoichi attire in his time. Not to mention the smell, or the odd things they sold to one another.

They had all asked him 'for his cause play'.

Whatever the hell that meant.

It was almost like the Rinne Festival that Konoha had held, except worse in possibly every way imaginable.

And those were just the 'normal' people.

Some people had bloodlines that were supposed to be extinct—that wooden man was one such example. Other people had bloodlines Obito had never even heard of. One man was made entirely out of fire. Another had wheels for feet. One person actually had a shark for a head.

Even worse, Obito was a sensor-type ninja, which meant he could easily sense any and all chakra around him. This perception was only aided by his Mangekyou, which gave him perfectly clear, crystalline vision, even from the small eyehole of his mask.

Nobody had any chakra.

What the fuck.

With all of this in mind, Obito was forced to reevaluate his situation. Sitting on one of the many benches, his feet dangling, Obito considered everything he had seen.

Ok. I know I'm not in a genjutsu. People dress strangely and have odd customs and bloodlines, so unless there's an entire continent Madara was not aware of, then I can't be… wherever I was before I came here.

I'm also the only person with chakra.

He had also never heard of a village, country, township, or any other place with the name 'Musufatu' or 'Japan'.

Where am I, really? Another world?

Something like that was not necessarily impossible. Unheard of? Yes. Impossible? No. His Kamui dimension was proof enough of that.

If I am trapped here, what the fuck do I do now?

Look for a way out? All I ever wanted was an escape from the hell that was the shinobi world. A dream, a utopia—with no suffering—that is all I wanted. Do I even want to go back? Is it even possible?

There was a strange, almost osmotic pressure keeping him trapped in whatever 'this place' was called. He could envision where he wanted to appear, where he wanted to teleport to. He could even feel himself begin the process of teleporting—his body swirling into his eye—before he was violently booted out and back into this strange world with even stranger people. The harder he tried, the more violently he was booted out.

Unable to leave this strange world—at least, for now—Obito resolved to at least try and figure out how this place operated. Starting with finding out what the hell an 'enemy' was to these people.

If they had no word for 'enemy', then maybe this place would be pretty peaceful after all.

Finishing his cloud of candy, he threw the remaining stick backwards and over his head in a high arc, before finally clanging as it landed inside an open garbage can.

Omake—Cotton Candy

Tobi enviously glared at the swirl. Said swirl was so swirly, it was almost as swirly as his mask. Apparently, said swirliness was also edible, evidenced by the fact that many people were eating it. Round and round the colours went, big clouds of candy seemingly made out of nothing at all.

Tobi had to have some.

Finally, Tobi made it to the front of the line.

"Can Tobi have some swirly-cloud candy?" he all but begged.

The old lady—the creator of swirls—smiled at him.

"For 500 yen, yes, you can."

Tobi nearly burst into tears. After all, how could one expect a man like him to have currency, dimension hopping aside?

"Tobi has no yen," he declared sadly, sitting down in front of her stall.

"No yen, no candy," she replied simply.

"Please?" he raised himself to his knees as though offering himself up to God.

"No."

"Pretty please?" Tobi clasped his hands and lowered his head in a bow.

"No."

"You can't! Tobi needs swirly-cloud candy!" Tobi exclaimed, standing up, pointing his finger directly into the old lady's face.

She was unmoved. As a grandmother that had raised four children and had helped to raise twenty grandchildren, she had seen worse tantrums.

"And I need yen! Come back when you have enough! You ought to be ashamed of yourself, a grown man acting in such a way!"

Tobi wilted at the rebuke, turning away in shame.

Chapter End

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