A/N: Here is the next awaited chapter. Sorry it took me so long to get this posted, I've just gotten over a bad cold and was working diligently splitting all of my available time working both my jobs. All mistakes are my own, and I will admit that I am no expert to all things medical. There may be glaring errors, but they worked with my storyline. I hope you all enjoy and please remember that this is fiction so not all things will be accurate.
Hope the new year treats you all well.
Virgil and Gordon had opted to remain at the hospital after John who began to complain of a severe headache had retired with Penny's help to the hotel across the way from the hospital. Gordon had pulled his knees up and held them to his chest, he stared despondently ahead as he replayed the moments leading up to his realization that there was something wrong with Alan. Virgil sat across from him and he had one leg crossed over the other, resting his elbow on the armrest of the chair and holding his chin in the palm of his hand. He was lost in thought, grateful that before she left Penny had told the nurses to pass on a message to the surgeon in charge of Alan's care that she granted permission for the brothers to be privy to any information regarding their brother. Then she told them she was taking one of the brothers to get a hotel room set up for the family.
When the middle and second youngest sons were left alone, Virgil looked across to Gordon and took in his posture. Knowing that Gordon was blaming himself, Virgil got up and moved to the seat next to his immediate younger brother.
"Hey, you know you did the right thing." Virgil said, unsure how Gordon would take Virgil's attempts to offer comfort in the face of such an incident.
"No, I didn't. Please don't say I did." Gordon replied sullenly. He didn't want to hear how he saved his little brother's life as he was too busy blaming himself for why they were at that hospital in the first place.
"Gords, please don't do that. If you hadn't been with Alan, we would all probably have never known Alan had been bitten in the first place, we could have all come home and Alan be gone." Virgil said to which Gordon finally lifted his head and he turned hazel eyes alight with fire towards his brother.
"Don't do that. You know it was because of me that Alan was at that beach in the first place. So go ahead and say it. Blame me." Gordon replied to which Virgil shook his head, confused as to why Gordon was accepting blame.
"I don't understand Gordon. It's not like you told the shark to bite Alan." Virgil said to which Gordon flinched.
"No, I didn't tell the shark to attack Al…but it was my fault that we were at the beach. I got my ass grounded and as a result Alan took it on himself to cheer me up. We'd talked just last night about what to do today and like an idiot I said I was looking forward to the next low tide so I could harvest some cockles to study. Alan volunteered to dive to see what he could find and I let him. I let him go down there and for what? A hungry shark." Gordon said, his tone hot and tense. The island medic rubbed at his eyes, tired in part from the toll that donating blood had on him and a hurried flight back in from Christchurch where he'd been visiting friends, a flight to and from Thunderbird 5 and yet another flight to Auckland. Virgil pinched the bridge of his nose to chase his own headache that was brewing.
"Gords, we don't blame you for what happened. Life happens and sometimes people are dealt a bad hand. Alan unfortunately lost a limb, but it's better a limb than his life." Virgil said, trying to remain as upbeat as possible despite their family's circumstances.
"Virgil, just stop! Just stop! Stop trying to tell me it's all going to be alright, it's not going to be!" Gordon argued, bound and determined by his guilt; believing it to be his fault.
"Gentlemen, your brother is now out of recovery. If you'll follow me, I can take you to him." A nurse, a different one from earlier led the brothers down a winding path of different halls and units before they stopped outside Alan's room in the AICU. "Your brother is sedated, so he's likely to be asleep for some time. The doctor was concerned with how much blood he lost prior to arrival but he's positive that Alan will be fine with time. You may go in, but please be aware that you need to keep your voices down, there are a few others in there that are trying to sleep."
… … … … … … … … … … …
Once both older brothers had been allowed into Alan's shared hospital room, they both migrated to his bed. Alan was completely out, asleep in a reclined position. What was left of his arm was swathed in gauze and bandages meanwhile Alan's upper body was wrapped in an edema swelling wrap. There was an oxygen cannula running beneath the kid's nose for the time being. He was sound asleep, and Gordon was the first by his side. The young aquanaut sat on the side of Alan's bed, his eyes burned with unshed tears and he struggled to keep them contained. He just sat and looked at Alan, feeling his guilt weigh him down even more and he didn't know how to get out from under it.
Reaching out, Gordon combed his fingers through Alan's hair. He took notice not for the first time that Alan was deathly pale. Alan's skin was paler than the whitest of ivory and that didn't sit well with Gordon. He looked around the bed, finding the bag of blood ala Virgil that hung on a hook overhead feeding it into Alan's veins. The dark red of the bag sent shivers up Gordon's back and he nearly jumped out of his skin when Virgil leaned around him to press a caring kiss on Alan's brow. He'd forgotten Virgil was in the room with him.
Both brothers' eyes were drawn to Alan's arm…or what was left of it. The top portion of his arm was still intact until approximately two inches above what used to be Alan's elbow. From there and below was just air. Virgil sucked in as deep a breath as he could take in and he blew it back out as fast as he'd taken it in. Seeing what happened to Alan was like the absolute rudest wakeup call he'd ever been on the receiving end of. He watched as Gordon stood to grab a chair left helpfully nearby before he lowered his head to rest on the bed beside Alan's other arm.
Virgil sat where Gordon had previously been sitting and he laid his head down at the foot of the bed. Alan's feet didn't reach the lowest part of the bed, so Virgil doubted he'd disturb Alan with resting his head. He wasn't going to sleep, but he just needed to rest his eyes. Just for a few minutes. Gordon pretended to sleep until he heard Virgil's soft rhythmic breathing indicating his older brother had fallen asleep. Then was when he felt safe to let the tears come to the surface. His eyes began to burn and Gordon worked hard to keep in control of his breathing so as not to wake Virgil or any of the other occupants of the room. The tears fell fast and soaked into the bedding beneath his cheek. He couldn't help the emotion, he still blamed himself despite Virgil's insistence that nobody blamed him for what happened to Alan. Before long the tears ran out and with it came the exhaustion and soon Gordon fell asleep for real. Time passed quickly and before anyone knew, a nurse had entered the AICU to check on the collective patients. Neither of the older Tracy brothers present heard the nurse return with blankets to delicately drape over their shoulders.
Morning came much too fast and before long Virgil who had slept in an odd and terribly uncomfortable position awoke with his back screaming at him to change posture. He sat up slowly and painfully as he gave a shake of his head. A quick glance around then down at his watch told the island medic that it was six in the morning and the sun was fast coming up. Four hours wasn't nearly long enough to get substantial sleep, especially not with the night they'd had. A swift glance at Alan told the middle son that his baby brother was still out of it. The bag of blood that Virgil donated was empty as was the saline bag. He checked his arm where the needle had been inserted and peeled the cotton ball and coban tape off the inside of his elbow. He was just sure that when either the nurse or doctor noticed the empty bag of blood that they'd be ready to sink their fangs into Virgil again for more blood.
Soon enough Gordon woke up and he was fast to look away from Virgil. He didn't want his brother to know he'd let the tears fall last night while pretending to sleep. Controlled was he in allowing himself to drop the shield enough to cry for Alan.
"It's okay Gordon…you don't need to hide around me." Virgil whispered knowing why Gordon hid his face. The aquanaut went to stand up but Virgil stood also and hugged his younger brother. They were quiet so as not to disturb the sleeping adolescence. "Come on, lets take a walk. Being cooped up in here is doing neither of us any good."
… … … … … … … … … … …
Alan came awake shortly after his two older brothers left the room and he looked around the room, mutedly as he tried to understand what happened to him. He was unsure how he got into this unfamiliar room, but he was too tired to investigate further. Feeling his eyes close, Alan fell back into a light sleep.
… … … … … … … … … … …
Virgil led his brother down to the canteen where he bought both of them a nice hot coffee. They left the canteen, Virgil talking to his brother about the ordeal the day previous and how he was still in disbelief. Gordon didn't say much as he was blaming himself. Virgil picked up on it and he stopped Gordon before he boarded the elevator that would take them back upstairs to Alan's ward.
"Hey, we don't blame you for this. It could have happened to any one of us." Virgil said trying to get it through Gordon's thick skull.
"But that's the thing, it wouldn't have happened if I hadn't gotten grounded. I already told you last night, Alan and I probably would have been in the pool or in the living room playing video games." Gordon started to argue.
"But that's where you're wrong, Alan had been begging me to take him free-diving before he ever asked you to take him. He could have been attacked at anytime or not. There's no telling when and if it'd have happened." Virgil replied, standing tall in front of his younger brother. "When are you just going to accept that this is Alan's new normal? There is no changing this, if you want to continue blaming yourself then you should probably start to blame dad for moving us to the island after mom's death. Us living in the tropics was a risk we were all willing to take. Including Alan. He begged grandma and dad to let him move in with us. Hell, blame Alan if you must. He was the one that wanted to go out cockle hunting." Virgil said which caused Gordon's dander to come up.
"Don't you dare blame Alan; he didn't ask for this to happen!" Gordon gripped his coffee tightly, his eyes narrowing in irritation.
"That's exactly why you shouldn't be blaming yourself. You didn't ask for this to happen, none of us did. But it did and there's nothing we can do to change it." Virgil said to which Gordon visibly deflated. "We'll take this one step at a time, but for now we need to keep any talk of blame to ourselves. Alan needs us now more than ever."
… … … … … … … … … … …
Alan stayed asleep up until his older brothers returned to his room and got settled. He was slow to open his eyes, fatigue and exhaustion weighing his eyes so much that it took all of Alan's energy to simply open his eyes. Gordon was sat on Alan's uninjured side, not being able to stomach the injured side. When Alan did open his eyes, he was met with stormy hazel eyes.
Gordon grew excited to see Alan's eyes opened. He scooted forward on his seat keeping his gaze locked with Alan's. His younger brother looked around, obviously looking for their father and oldest brother. "They'll be here as soon as they can. They've got another ten hours." Gordon said as he reached up and clasped hands with Alan to attempt to reassure him that everything was okay.
"Where am I?" Alan asked, his voice a whisper.
Gordon and Virgil shared a look unsure what to say and were caught off guard when a rather feminine voice spoke up.
"Alan darling, I'm so relieved to see you're awake." Penny said as she entered the room with John on her heels. "How are you feeling?"
"Tired…in pain…so, where am I?" Alan asked again, knowing Penny hadn't meant to segue his conversation with his brothers.
Penny felt like as the legal guardian for Alan thus far that she should be the one to tell Alan and one look to all the brothers told them her intentions.
"Alan, darling…what do you remember?" Penny inquired, trying to ascertain just what Alan recalled of his ordeal.
"I was coming back up for air, had a couple of cockles for Gordon and then…nothing." Alan replied, separating his grip from Gordon's to reach up and rub his forehead which had started to throb. "So what happened?"
"Well darling…you…you were attacked. By a shark. It was fortunate that Gordon was with you at the beach because he got you the help you needed." Penny said, cut and dry to the point. There was no point in hiding the attack, Alan would find out sooner or later and it'd be a little bit easier if he knew what led to his whole world being turned upside down.
"Oh…" Alan said, not knowing what else he could possibly say. "But I'll be okay?"
"Yes, with time." Penny reassured though she never told Alan what type of injuries he sustained. She was waiting for the doctor to come in to check Alan over, she didn't know what all had happened to Alan and she didn't think she was the best person to tell Alan about his ultimate life change.
The doctor was on his way, Penny had seen the nurse on her way to the AICU and was told that she'd heard Alan talking to his brothers when she was in checking on another patient. She was on her way to alert Alan's attending. Penny still went up to Alan and leaned down to kiss him on the cheek. Gordon had leaned back to offer Penny more room to reach his brother.
"I'm so relieved to see you're awake. You gave the whole lot of us a fright." Penny said, gently chiding Alan without any heat.
"I'm sorry." Alan whispered as he shifted his body. The doctor didn't wait but another couple minutes and soon he was in to check on his young patient.
… … … … … … … … … … …
The rest of the day continued in muted numbness. Alan had gotten the news from his attending that that shark had taken Alan's arm and there unfortunately was no salvaging anything. Alan didn't react, not truly. His eyes were wide, they grew misty; but Alan blinked the moisture away and remained strong. He looked down at what was left of his arm and he acted like he was unaffected to a point. It blew Gordon, Virgil, and John away. They all were expecting Alan to lose his cool, but he stunned them all with his nonplussed demeanor.
Penny had excused herself to call their father, having promised to stay in touch. Alan had remained quiet, listening to his brothers talk amicably about anything but the attack. Virgil had even chuckled however briefly before one look back at Alan sobered him up. The youngest figured he'd do better to go back to sleep for a little bit, still exhausted from the blood loss. He closed his eyes and was sound asleep in moments. They had a little over an hour until Jeff and Scott were expected to arrive and Penny had already arranged for her faithful retainer Parker to pick them up after they landed.
Gordon felt like he was getting ready to start crawling up the wall if he didn't have a change of scenery soon and with that he stood, without much explanation. With one glance back Gordon left the AICU to go for a walk. He didn't know where but figured the grounds would be good enough. It wasn't that he didn't want to spend time with his brothers, but he continually wanted to ask Alan how different it felt now to be one arm less. Though he knew the question wouldn't be well received. So, to keep from making him chew thoroughly on his own foot, he forcibly removed himself from the room. He stayed outside approximately another hour until he figured he'd probably go back in before everyone began to worry about him. As he was re-entering the hospital, he saw a couple familiar faces. Jeff was following Parker who led the two older Tracy's to the elevators. Jeff spotted Gordon and he stopped long enough to give him a squeeze on the shoulder before he hurried along behind Parker to get to his youngest child. That left Scott and Gordon in the foyer of the hospital.
… … … … … … … … … … …
Gordon felt Scott wrap him up in a warm and tight embrace and it was like a soothing balm. Gordon rarely if ever showed emotion apart from laughter to his family and he'd refuse to admit that he bawled like a baby the moment he was hugged by his oldest brother.
"Thank you for all that you did for our brother, he's still got a fighting chance because of what you did." Scott whispered into Gordon's ear which the aquanaut disagreed with. He didn't feel like he'd done anything useful. Yes, he'd gotten Alan to a hospital, but Gordon still blamed himself for this happening to Alan. If he hadn't gotten himself grounded, Gordon and Alan likely would have been in the pool playing or inside playing video games. But Gordon got grounded which led to the aquanaut being in a foul mood and Alan being Alan had thought he'd gather shells or cockles to cheer his brother up and he'd gotten bit by a shark instead.
Gordon didn't respond and Scott took notice because he expected Gordon to start explaining everything that led up to the attack. He simply stood with his face buried in Scott's shoulder, hiding his face from the world. Scott led Gordon to a bench just outside the foyer and they sat down. Gordon had lowered his eyes, refusing to look at Scott. The oldest brother knew his second youngest brother was far from okay. But he didn't know what he could say that would make Gordon see that what he did was a courageous thing. Gordon was too busy blaming himself and Scott for the life of him just wanted to see his baby brother. Not that his second youngest brother didn't matter.
"Gordon…you've seen Alan…please tell me. How is he? How does he seem to you?" Scott asked as he longed to go up and join the rest of his family with Alan.
"He's doing okay…I guess. He's taking this new reality like a champ. He's not out here bawling like a baby like I am. I feel so foolish. I was with him and just like that." Gordon emphasized with a snap of his fingers. "Things were upended, and I couldn't figure out which way was up or down."
"Gordon, those feelings are normal with traumatic events. You're not to feel foolish or like you aren't a champ also." Scott started to say until he was interrupted by Gordon.
"Those feelings are normal for other people, not me." Gordon said loudly before he lowered his voice to just above a whisper. "I can't have those feelings if I'm ever going to prove my weight in salt for International Rescue. IR needs strong people…not wimps."
"Gordon you are not a wimp and I don't ever want to hear you speak lowly about yourself. Being forced to undertake such a task like providing field care is not easy and only those trained for such occasions allow them to remain calm. Of which according to John you did. Very well. Dad was on a teleconference with the surgeon when not knowing how Alan was doing was practically driving him up the walls. The surgeon was impressed with your knowledge of a field tourniquet and he asked dad how you learned to do that. Dad said you were trained when you were an active member of W.A.S.P."
"But I wasn't trained in field medicine." Gordon argued before Scott silenced his argument with a single look.
"Dad said it as a cover. But that's my point, you did an outstanding job rendering aid to Alan when he needed you and we couldn't ask for anything better. Alan is still here with us, albeit it not entirely whole." Scott said to which Gordon lowered his head in perceived shame. "But there's nothing you or anyone could have done differently to avoid it. You think that if it hadn't been for you getting grounded…when that may not have been the case. Woulda, Coulda, Shoulda. In any case, nobody is to blame. Not you, not Alan, not anyone."
Gordon still felt a shred of guilt for not being able to do more, but his oldest brother hauled him up with an arm around his shoulder. Gordon was surprised, but still he followed his brother.
"Come on, I don't know about you, but I would like to see Alan." Scott said as he dragged Gordon with him. The young aquanaut wouldn't admit it to anyone if asked, but the things Scott said to him meant more than the weight of gold to him.
… … … … … … … … … … …
When Scott and Gordon arrived to the AICU, Alan was awake and talking to his dad and other brothers. He seemed okay to Gordon, almost like Alan hadn't just survived a traumatic experience. When Scott walked into Alan's view, he practically lit up. Scott walked over, hugging Alan gently but still that same Scott bear hug that Alan always claimed to love from early childhood to now.
"Hey kiddo. I'm so glad to see you're okay. You had all of us incredibly worried." Scott murmured softly. Alan smiled up at him before turning his smile to Gordon who was hiding just out of view. Alan reached out with his only remaining hand to beckon him closer. Once Gordon stepped around the bed, he was pushed closer by John who was trying to encourage him to go nearer. Alan grasped Gordon's hand and gave it a squeeze.
"Thanks, I wish there was something I could do to repay you." Alan said as he finally got to give his brother and hero a hug in thanks for saving his life.
"All I can think of is that you do not do something like this again." Gordon said, though his joke got a few chuckles. Gordon knew it was too soon to make a joke like this. He didn't know how they'd work with Alan having use of only one hand from here on out. Gordon didn't want to think of how this would affect Alan's inclusion to International Rescue. The kid has been wanting to be a member since he learned of the top-secret organization and as much money as they had at their disposal there wasn't enough technology in the world capable of creating a prosthetic arm to provide Alan with use of a hand. Real or fake.
There was a brief knock on the door of the AICU and Alan's attending came in. He entered with an easy smile as he introduced himself to Jeff and Scott. He'd already made acquaintances with the rest of the family. Without further ado, the doctor pulled the privacy curtain and started to unwrap Alan's arm so he could check it for infection. Gordon didn't think he was ready, but Alan's hand was still tightened securely with the vice grip of a boa constrictor. Alan didn't look right away but when he did he merely blinked silently. Jeff watched Alan, waiting for him to lose it and to his surprise Alan remained calm. Virgil and John both paled when they saw the full area, Gordon was surprised he didn't freak out having been so panicked immediately following the attack. The doctor commented that the bite looked good and a collective thought passed through the minds of each member of Alan's family.
'What part of this wound looked good?'
The doctor stood to retrieve fresh gauze to replace the soiled material. He changed gloves before he cleaned the area with betadine and began to re-wrap the wound, hiding the stitching and the remainder of the arm from view. While the doctor was wrapping fresh material on Alan's arm, he informed the family that he was confident that Alan could be moved to his own room and once done changing Alan's dressing, the doctor would go see about preparing a more private room for his young patient. Once finished, the doctor took the soiled materials and disposed of them before removing his gloves and washing his hands prior to exiting the AICU. Alan had taken to staring off, having gotten lost in thought.
Alan didn't say much more until he was in his own room, Parker acting as a personal guard to allow the family a chance to discuss what they'd do now with Alan and how this would affect his future as well as them all as a family. Jeff was insistent that they not look too much into this and while it was a minor setback, this wasn't the end of the line for Alan's career with IR. With the topic of conversation being on IR, Jeff did acknowledge Gordon's bravery and fortitude in remaining as levelheaded as possible given the situation enough to get Alan the help he needed. The next conversation was how do they break the news to the public so that they could nip any rumors in the bud.
"Penny said that she would take the heat on Alan's behalf so that we don't need to disclose that it happened where we live. She's been thinking about it and she does have a private island that she's mentioned in the past where she likes to go on holiday. She's already said that she has conjured up a story that she took Alan and Gordon with her on holiday being legal guardian and Alan was attacked there. As there were no witnesses aside from Gordon to verify, it should be a fairly easy to distribute to the press." Jeff said as he looked at each of his sons. Alan's eyes were drooping as were Virgil's and Jeff's gaze travelled to the additional bag of blood that had been retrieved from Virgil and given to Alan in a directed donation.
It hadn't been Jeff's first choice, but of all of Jeff and Lucy's sons Virgil and Alan were the only two that were exact blood matches. Scott, John and Gordon were all different. They were all either A, B, or AB negatives just like their mother. Jeff was A positive meanwhile Virgil and Alan were both AB positive. Doctors had been baffled that two of their sons had been so incredibly lucky they didn't perish in the womb. Doctors pushed Lucy to undergo treatments so that the Rh incompatibility didn't kill either boy or Lucy. Deciding that both of his sons needed a break, Jeff took the lead and stood before beginning to usher his middle son from the room. With Virgil and Scott they managed to lead Gordon from the room leaving John to stand guard. The aquanaut was hesitant to leave but their father managed to convince him.
"You've barely slept, if you want to help Alan you need to get some rest. None of us have really slept in a day if not more and we all need to be well rested to be able to care for him." Jeff guided Gordon with a hand on his shoulder until they all were in the hall. From there Jeff ushered them all away without nary a glance back at the AICU.
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The moment the family made it back to their hotel room, Gordon nearly collapsed on the closest bed, never mind the fact that Scott laid claim on it just as soon as they entered the room. Jeff watched over each of his boys that came from the hospital as they bundled underneath the blankets and soon the room was quiet. A yawn snuck out of Jeff without warning and Jeff was loathe he had to leave his baby in the hospital to go get sleep. Slipping beneath the sheets, Jeff was fast to fall asleep much like his sons.
Scott slept for a little bit but was soon woken up by Gordon's harried movements. Gordon was tossing and turning fitfully and was mumbling in his sleep. Scott sat up rubbing his eyes and took notice that he wasn't the only one awake. Jeff and Virgil both had sat up simultaneously amidst Gordon's tossing and turning. Scott who was closest reached out a hand, but before he could say or do anything Gordon shot up like a bullet, Alan's name yelled loudly and startling everyone in the room. His chest was heaving as he struggled to suck in enough breath. Scott who was closest gently put his hand on Gordon's shoulder making them both jump when Gordon flinched at the touch.
"It's okay Gords, it's okay. It was just a bad dream." Scott said trying his best to soothe Gordon who had begun to shake.
"It wasn't a dream though." Gordon said breathlessly. When he did manage to catch his breath he looked to his older brothers and father. "Alan was in the water…again. I couldn't save him."
"But you did save him." Jeff said as he climbed from his bed he was sharing with Virgil to go to his second youngest son. "You saved him and I am so incredibly proud of you."
"Yeah, Gords. It's because of you that Alan is still with us." Virgil said as he joined his dad and Scott in trying to reassure Gordon.
"How can none of you blame me?" Gordon whispered.
"How can you think we'd blame you? It was nobody's fault. It was an act of nature. It's what sharks do." Scott asked, trying to wrap his mind around Gordon's guilt. He couldn't understand why Gordon was so quick to blame himself.
"We've been over this. Why do you need me to admit it again?" Gordon snapped. Jeff held up his hand to begin to diffuse the situation but Scott stood with a frustrated growl.
"This wasn't supposed to happen. Alan was supposed to be safe at our home, that's why we moved there. If the Hood was able to break in last summer and now this, maybe we'd do better if one of us lived on the mainland with him." Scott said as he started thinking of various ways to protect his baby brother short of bubble wrap.
"You're not being realistic Scott. The Hood breaking in at our home was a fluke, a freak event. The Hood is not going to come back. He's in that max security prison and has been in there for a year and many more to come. This shark attack was also just a freak event. Your brother is safe there, has been and will be from here on out. We needn't worry about him. We just need to make sure he has a way to contact us if he should ever find trouble like this again." Jeff said before he quieted his sons.