Chapter 12. The Healing

On Tuesday morning, Julia headed out in her nurses' apron to make a house call at the Canfield's. She needed to check Joseph's progress. As she walked, she thought about last night and the fun she'd had. She was so thankful for this group of friends, and hoped Fiona would plan more nights together. It was a fun way to get together, and enjoy each other.

As Julia neared the Canfield's house, she noticed Newton tied up out front. She walked right up and greeted him, putting her hand out. "Hello, Newton. What are you doing here?" She walked over to his side and petted him firmly on the neck. He always seemed to like that. He turned and nuzzled her neckline, and she laughed. "Wooahh, boy, remember your manners."

When Nathan came out the door of Joseph's house, he saw someone in skirts on the other side of Newton, flirting and petting his horse. He knew by the way Newton was enjoying himself, exactly who it must be. "Miss Matthews, my horse is on duty, and you are…distracting him." Nathan said, taking a line from last night.

Julia looked around Newton at Nathan, coming down the stairs, and laughed. "Ha ha, very funny." she said, "If I never hear that word again, it will be too soon." She returned her gaze to Newton and just kept petting him. Finally she said, "He's just so...irresistible." Just like you.

As Nathan stood in front of her, she took him in, wearing his uniform. Julia had seen him several times in his red serge, but from up close, it was always impressive. The red brought out the dark of his lashes, which made his eyes look so blue. And, right now they were fixed on her, and well, she was trying to think straight.

"You look nice in your uniform." she said low. He was twirling his hat nervously and she noticed.

"You do, too." he replied, taking her in, wearing a lavender dress under her nurses apron. Julia realized she needed to change the subject or they were not going to get anywhere, anytime soon.

Julia looked down at her feet, and said, "My brother wants to take me riding this afternoon. Do you think I'm ready?" She looked back up at him for his reply.

"Well, he's as well trained as I am, so I'm sure he'll take good care of you." Nathan said. "It would be good for you to have a second lesson."

"Are we still able to keep our lesson together, on Friday?" She asked nervously, "If I promise not to let my brother ruin any of the good habits you've taught me?"

"You can count on it. 1 p.m. on Friday." Nathan replied. "I'm looking forward to it."

"Me, too. Well, I better get inside to check up on Joseph's progress." Julia turned and walked halfway up the stairs, as he put on his hat and mounted Newton. She looked back at him, and said, "Have a great day, Nathan."

"You too, Jules, " and with a tip of his hat, he clicked Newton off in a walk, towards town.

Joseph's leg was healing nicely, and right on schedule with expectation. Minnie was making bread and the house smelled wonderful. The children were at school. Julia was packing up her medical bag, when Minnie came and asked if she'd like a tea. She had never really sat with them, and she did have some questions she'd love to ask Joseph.

"I would love some, tea, Minnie, if it's not too much trouble?" Julia answered.

"No trouble at all." Minnie said and motioned for her to sit with Joseph as she went back to the kitchen to make tea.

"How are you settling in here?" Joseph asked her.

"Well, I have to say, I feel very blessed. I had no idea what was in store for me, when I answered Faith's ad for a nurse. I grew up in a small town, and I don't think I was made for the big city. I loved my work in Calgary, it just never felt like home." she paused. Joseph nodded like he knew what she meant. "Hope Valley has felt like home since my second day, which is so strange. I never experienced that before."

"I know what you mean. My mom used to say, 'home is where the heart is'. Minnie and I just fell in love with Hope Valley, and that's what made it feel like home. Our heart is here." Joseph explained.

"I think that's an accurate statement, Joseph, about the heart. I grew up on Nova Scotia, in a town called Peggy's Cove. I left to pursue my studies, and afterward, stayed on as a nurse in Halifax. But, when my father passed, I returned home to Peggy's Cove for a little while. There was no family left there, and it just didn't feel like home anymore. The house, that held so many memories, felt barren and empty. My heart just wasn't there anymore." Julia shared.

"Where did you go after that?" Joseph asked.

"I took a job in Calgary, at a large hospital. Jake, my brother, was posted there at the time, so I moved to be closer to him. But he left about two years after I got there, because of a new posting outside of Edmonton. About a year after he left, I just lost my taste for big city life. That's what made me consider the nurse's position here in Hope Valley." Julia explained. "I loved my job in Calgary, I worked with some amazing doctors, and learned a lot. But, it never truly felt like home."

Minnie came over with the tea then, and joined them. "Is your mother with you, Julia?" she asked.

"No, she died when I was two. I don't remember her, but my father shared so many stories about her. He always said I reminded him of her. We were very close my father and I."

"It sounds like a special relationship. How did your mother die?" Joseph asked.

"According to my father, my mother was never healthy again after her pregnancy with me. She was always weak and sickly after my birth. When I was two, there was a very strong influenza outbreak, and as much as my father tried to keep her healthy, she caught it. She wasn't able to fight for very long." Julia shared, pausing to look down into her tea cup. "My father was a boat engineer, and after her death, he became a single dad, caring for my brother and I on his own." She paused to sip some tea. "My brother is 7 years older than me. We actually have a sibling between us, but she died in infancy, at 2 months old. Her name was Deborah, though they called her Debbie."

"I'm sorry for your loss, Julia." Minnie said. "Your father sounds like a very special person. I'm sure you two were quite a pair. It's so hard to lose someone we are close to, and it's ok to miss them."

A lone tear went down Julia's cheek as Minnie said that, and she wiped it slowly. Minnie couldn't know how much Julia appreciated what she said about missing. She still missed her father everyday, even though it had been over 4 years. She had just grown used to missing him. She had grown accustomed to not being able to write him or go visit him. There was just a black hole, where he used to be. If Julia wanted to see her father, she had to go down a long corridor in her heart, and revisit her memories tucked away safely behind lock and key. It was hard to keep those memories locked up, but Julia thought that was the best way to keep going.

Now, sitting in front of Joseph and Minnie, she wondered. Julia knew she had done it that way because she hadn't any other choice. She had been all alone with all her memories in their big house back in Peggy's Cove. And, she had been all alone when she moved to Calgary. However, here in Hope Valley, she wasn't alone anymore. Now, she was surrounded by a community and friends and knew she could open that door in her heart. But, was she ready? And did she feel safe enough?

"It's ok to miss someone, Julia. It means we admit to ourselves that they are not here anymore. It doesn't mean we will ever stop missing them. It just means we are honest with ourselves. The Lord offers healing in our places of loss. And, he offers it in His perfect timing. Don't try to rush anything, just do what feels naturally to you. We give you permission to grieve your loss." Joseph gently said. He had such a way of touching the heart.

Something inside of Julia broke like a dam at his words, when he gave her permission to grieve. Immediately, she was in Minnie's arms. Julia shook and shook with racks of sobs, as the grief washed over her. Minnie just held her strong and gently caressed her hair, her shoulders, and her back. Minnie didn't let go and just let Julia cry. Wave after wave came, and Minnie just looked at Joseph, smiling.

When the sobs finally slowed, Julia stayed a long time in Minnie's arms. When she finally pulled back, Minnie gave her a handkerchief. Her makeup was mostly on Minnie's apron now, and she apologized as she wiped her eyes.

"Don't you worry a bit, Julia, I've got plenty of these. It's no problem at all." Minnie continued to rub her back, as Julia stayed beside her on the settee.

Julia looked as though she wanted to say something else, but didn't know how. Finally, she ventured. "I think today is the first step in the healing process for me. I have felt a soft knock for a while now, but it's so hard to open the door."

"I know exactly what you mean, Julia." Joseph said. "And, sometimes it takes a flashback of a memory, or a situation that reminds us of someone we lost, to make us slow down and take the time to open the door."

Julia decided to go further. "I know what you mean. I think this was brought on because of Nathan and Allie."

"How so?" Minnie asked.

"Well, my brother Jake is 7 years older than me. He left home when I was about 10 years old, to start his military training. Once he was gone, it was just my Dad and me. We were all that was left. When I look at Nathan and Allie, and their sweet relationship…" she was crying again, unable to go further. But, Joseph and Minnie understood. Nathan and Allie reminded Julia of her relationship with her own father.

Minnie pulled Julia into her once again, and Julia released all those emotions, in tears. When she was done, Julia sat back and wiped her eyes again.

Julia was sure her face was a mess now, but she didn't care. She felt so light, as if a burden had been lifted from her shoulders, one she didn't even realize she was carrying. She knew the work of healing was not done, but she was on the right path.

As she finished her tea, she was so thankful for these two precious people. "Thank you so much for talking with me. I know why people come and see you, now. And, if it's ok with you, I would love to come back again." Julia stated, face shining.

"We would love that, Julia. It is my calling to be here for everyone in Hope Valley. And, you are part of the family now." Joseph said. "Please come see me anytime. You know where to find me."

"Julia, grieving is a process, and the healing doesn't happen overnight. Just be open to whenever and however the Lord decides to bring you into the next step." Minnie said, smiling at her and rubbing her back.

"Thank you both, so much." Julia stood, and smoothed her apron and skirt.

Julia said said her good-byes to both of them, and walked out into the warm sunshine.

As she walked back towards town, Julia felt so much lighter, she wanted to skip. Using her better judgment, she decided to just walk happily along. Suddenly, a thought occurred to her. Julia's mind went to the trunk in her apartment. The one that held a painting, long packed up and locked away. She knew what she had to do now, and she would do it, as soon as she got home.

After her shift was over at the infirmary, Julia walked in to her apartment, and over to her trunk. She opened the lid, and moved everything else aside. From the very bottom, she pulled out a large rectangle, wrapped in a blanket. She unwrapped the blanket, and then cut string that held thick brown paper in place. Once the string was removed, she turned it over on her lap, and opened the thick brown paper.

Wrapped up tight inside, was a painting. One that she had forgotten was so very breathtaking. In the painting, the colors and shadows danced as the water crashed against the shore, as if in motion. Just above the shore, on a bright, grassy knoll was the magnificent lighthouse at Peggy's Point. Her father had painted it, and she had helped. It was the last painting they had worked on together.

What very few people knew was that her father, the meticulous naval architect, was also a magnificent painter. He saw colors and lines and shadows that others missed completely. And, he had taught Julia everything he knew. She had started painting with him from a very young age. She had been small, running in and out of his studio, sitting still only long enough to hear his lessons on highlights or lowlights. And then, he would set her up a smaller canvas next to his and they would paint together. Jake hadn't been interested, he had wanted to be outside, and then he was off to the military and then the Mounties. But, Julia had been interested, and had fallen in love with painting, because her father had loved it.

Until now, she hadn't been able to even unwrap the painting. Looking at it was just too painful. But now, because of the healing that came this morning, she was ready to put it up in her apartment. She wanted to look at it everyday, and remember those beautiful memories she and her father had made together. She went back to her trunk and took out a hammer, she rummaged and found a nail in her cupboard. And, she hung the painting, as the focal point of her apartment. It would be impossible to miss from either door of entry, nor when she would wake up in the morning.

Just then she heard a light tap on her door. Jake. She walked to the door and let him in, and he noticed the painting right away.

"Hi, brother. Look what I just hung." Julia told him.

Jake walked over and stood in front of the painting, unable to breath for a minute. It used to hang in the family room of their home in Peggy's Cove, as the center piece. He had forgotten how beautiful it was and how proud it made him feel. Jake stood there for a long time staring at it. When a little tear trickled down his cheek, Julia went into his arms. They cried there together, as they had never ever allowed themselves to do, since the passing of their father. Her healing turned into his healing, and he cried his turn now. Julia held him as he let a measure of his pain go. They stayed like that for a long time, until his racking sobs of grief became soft sobs of surrender.

When they composed themselves, Julia asked if he still wanted to go riding.

Jake answered, "Yes, Jules, I would like it very much, and I think it's just what we both need. But, I might need a few minutes to compose myself. And, also... I'm starving." Julia looked at the clock and realized it was almost lunchtime.

"Of course you are, Brother. Always starving." She laughed at him, he could always think about eating. "I need to change into my riding clothes, and then, if you want, we could grab lunch at the café before our ride?"

"Riding clothes?" Jake asked, with a curious smile. "My sister has become serious about riding all of a sudden. I wonder why?" he teased.

"Very funny. You go outside!" Julia chased him out onto her back porch. "And I'll change and be out shortly." She gave him a handkerchief, and he did his best to wipe his face, while he waited.

Julia quickly changed, tidied up her hair and her makeup, and joined him outside. They walked to the café and ate their fill before heading to the livery.

Jed had reserved Lucy for Julia and a horse named Bandit for Jake. "That's an appropriate horse name for a Mountie." Julia laughed. When Jed heard that Jake was a Mountie, he offered him one of his own horses, Samson.

Julia said, "Jed, that's so nice of you. We'll take whichever horse you would like. It's only my second ride, so I think Lucy is perfect for me." She went into Lucy's stall and got her all tacked up and ready.

"I would be honored to ride Samson, Jed. Thanks so much." Jed went and saddled Samson and brought him out.

Before they left, Julia glanced over at Newton's stall, and frowned when he wasn't there. Jake and Julia led the two horses out, and Jake did a check of Lucy and all her tack before letting Julia mount. He did the same for Samson, and then mounted himself. They left at slow walk, and Jake was impressed to see Julia on a horse.

"You look good up there, Jules." Jake encouraged her, checking her form.

"You sound like my riding instructor." Julia joked.

"He would say you looked good, even if you were covered in mud and rolled up in pig droppings." Jake joked, winking at her and laughing. "You could have locusts crusted in your hair and he would still find you beautiful."

"Ha, ha." she said, though the thought of locusts crusted in her hair did make a funny image. "And should I ask you about all that flirting with Faith?" Julia asked him.

"Well, now, I don't know how to answer that. I think she's nice, and she's been through a big heartbreak. I am just trying to be a friend, at the moment. In fact, I probably should tell you, I asked her to have dinner with me on Wednesday night." Jake confessed, and Julia's mouth fell open.

"Jake! She is nowhere near ready for anything new." Julia said.

"Well, I'm not trying to have a relationship. I just think she's great, and thought she could use a fun night out. Take her mind of her heartbreak, and make her remember that she's beautiful." Jake shared.

Julia did see his point, and thought Faith could surely use the boost. Jake was a nice guy, and would be respectful, a total gentleman. "You always did have a way with the ladies, Jake. How can you know that's what she needs?"

"Instincts." he said. She laughed out loud.

"Something you learned in Mountie training?" Julia teased him.

"No, something I learned by having a baby sister." Jake teased. She was quiet then, looking at him admiringly. She had always adored him, and thought he hung the moon. Jake was kind, gentle, and humble. Well, humble except when it came to his job or the ladies. He knew he was adept in both areas, and he was right. He could read people and situations. Julia knew it came from the right heart, even if it was annoying sometimes. She just hoped he didn't get hurt, putting himself out there.

"Now, back to the riding lesson, sis." he said. They kept on the path, and Jake had her try a trot and canter, and was happy with her progress. They rode fast and hard across her field, and then joined the trees on the other side. They came to the stream where she and Nathan had their picnic, and had gotten their feet wet, in the stream. Today, they just let the horses drink, and then decided to head back down to town. They didn't want to be late for dinner at Rosemary and Lee's.

When they got back to the livery, Nathan was just coming back in to get Newton for his evening rounds. Julia shared, with great excitement all about her ride with Jake. Nathan just watched her with pride, as she shared all the details.

Jake just watched them and smiled.

Jake and Julia knocked on the door at Lee and Rosemary's at 6:30 sharp. They were welcomed inside in true Rosemary style, with a huge hug and lots of happy fussing over. Lee came and shook both their hands, and offered them a seat at the settee.

"Dinner is not quite ready, but can I offer you both a glass of wine?", Lee asked. Rosemary was still working in the kitchen, but they both happily accepted.

"How has your time been in Hope Valley, Jake?" Lee asked.

"Great. I've met so many new friends, and had some really fun times. Today I got to see some of the landscape on a ride with Julia. And, we got in some really sweet brother-sister time. It's been a very good trip all round." Jake said.

Rosemary came around the corner and invited them to the table. "Dinner is served." she called out with excitement. They all came over and sat down.

"Rosemary, the table is stunning. You are such a great hostess." Julia pointed out.

They passed the dishes until everyone was served, Lee prayed, and they all started eating. The food was delicious, as usual, Rosemary had gone all out. Julia realized that everything Rosemary did, she did to the nine's. Julia knew it all came from a place of love, and she couldn't help but admire her.

"So, Jake, where are you posted?" Rosemary asked.

"In a little town called Spruce Grove, outside of Edmonton." He answered. "We are two Mounties on that posting, and we work with the Edmonton team a lot."

"My father was a Mountie, and we moved around a lot. Though we were closer to Cape Fullerton, or in Manitoba." Rosemary shared.

"What was his name? He must have been a Mountie in the early days." Jake said.

"He sure was. His name was Jean-Jacques Leveaux. Have you heard of him?" Rosemary asked.

"Sure, I've heard his name before. Wasn't he part of the crew that brought down the LaCroix brothers and their gang?" Jake asked.

"That's him. He also set in place some of the early training procedures for tracking, in Manitoba and some of the Northwest Territories." Rosemary replied.

"He's a legend. I wish I could have trained under him." Jake said, obviously impressed.

The conversation continued and flowed easily, and everyone had such a nice time. Dessert was especially good, peach cobbler. Lee invited them back to the settee for tea and coffee. When everyone was seated and served, Jake noticed a box of toys next to him.

"How old is your little one?" Jake inquired.

Lee didn't know how to answer, and stunned, looked at his sweet wife. But, Julia didn't miss the look Lee and Rosemary gave each other.

"We don't have any children, Jake." Rosemary said, her voice gentle and even. "Those toys are for our neighbors little boy, Jack, who we babysit often. We are good friends, and his godparents." she explained lightheartedly.

"I'm so sorry, I just assumed when I saw the cute wooden toys." Jake excused himself.

"Don't worry", Lee said, "it's not as sensitive a subject as it once was." As he smiled admiringly at his wife. She smiled right back at him with the same adoration.

"Oh, Julia, before I forget. I need a picture of you for the article in the paper. Fiona would love to come by tomorrow and take it in front of the infirmary. Would that be possible for you?" Rosemary asked. Julia started to protest, but decided to give in to this request, not wanting to disappoint Rosemary, especially after the sadness she had just seen in her eyes.

"I am in the infirmary all day tomorrow, so Fiona can come by anytime." Julia replied.

"Great." Rosemary said. They finished their tea while talking about the article and the finishing touches. Lee was talking to Jake about the sawmill and all of his employees. It started to get late, so Jake and Julia decided they should probably head home.

"Thank you both for a lovely evening. As usual, Rosemary, you have outdone yourself. Everything was lovely and the food, delicious." Julia said.

"Rosemary, you just let me know if Julia ever turns down an invitation, for dinner at your house. I'll ride all the way back from Spruce Grove to come in her place." Jake praised her. "I'm only one telegram away." he joked.

Rosemary laughed, and waved her hand at him. "You are too kind, and I'm glad you enjoyed yourself. I do love hosting." she stated.

Lee put his hand out to Jake, "Please, Jake, come back anytime. And, we have a guest room if you ever need it." Jake shook Lee's hand heartily.

"Oh, I don't know if it's wise to offer that, Lee. If your wife's breakfasts and lunches are as good as dinner, I might not leave on Thursday. I might just move in here." Jake joked.

Lee laughed out loud, but said, "Anything you need, Jake. It was our pleasure to have you. And, we are so happy to have Julia here."

Julia hugged them both, and Lee and Rosemary walked them to the door. As Jake and Julia walked down the lane, they waved back at their sweet friends, thankful for such a lovely evening together.