Author's Note:
This is my very first Author's Note. Sorry it took me so long, but I wanted this story to tell itself, and I didn't want to be very "present". However, regarding the next two chapters I felt like I need to give a little disclaimer.
So here it is: The next two chapters (18 and 19) might get a little "steamy" (though still PG by the world's standards). I felt it necessary, after the harsh rejection Nathan suffered, to establish the attraction between he and Julia (and more specifically her attraction to him). It's my attempt to REDEEM this rejection. I hope that I successfully achieve this, or at least manage to put a sizable dent in that rejection, over the course of the next two chapters.
It is my hope to redeem a lot of the dangling and lost story lines, for a lot of the characters of the show, through this story. Lot of ideas are swirling and in the works…
(Hint, hint: Good stuff is in the pipeline for Lee and Rosemary =)
So, stick with me and let's see where Nathan and Julia's love story takes us.
Chapter 18. The Resolution
On Sunday morning, Julia woke up when the sun was just beginning to light the sky. She was still feeling a mix of emotions over the events of the last two days, and went for a long walk. She needed to clear her head and get her focus back. Nathan's care was most important and everything else would have to wait. Enough of her head being at at odds with her heart. She knew the only way to be what Nathan needed most, an excellent nurse and caregiver, was to lock her feelings up. She had done it before. So she did it again.
She resolved herself to think of him only as a friend. And, on the way back from her walk, she felt stronger and more ready to face today's challenges.
Julia entered her apartment by the back door, took a long hot bath, and came into the infirmary after breakfast.
Nathan had woken up and seemed much better. Faith checked him over and was happy with his progress. She helped him get propped up to sitting and brought in his breakfast and coffee on a tray. Faith had given him a simple hospital robe to put on, to cover himself, and the half shirt he was still wearing.
When Julia came in, Nathan was sitting up in the bed, sipping coffee. The partition was pulled back and he noticed her right away. She ignored his eyes following her, and kept going over to the desk. She spoke quietly with Faith, who updated Julia on his progress.
A little while later, Julia came around the partition to collect Nathan's empty breakfast plate. "Good morning, Constable." She said with a friendly smile.
"Good morning, Jules." Nathan said, smiling back at her. She looked radiant this morning in a blue dress with gray accents, under her nurses apron. He also noticed how nice she smelled when she came close to collect his tray.
"You seem to be doing much better." Julia stated.
Nathan replied, "Indeed. I am still extremely sore, but it feels like a new day." He paused, "I got a good look at my stitches this morning, when Faith changed my bandage. I have to say, I am impressed. I don't think I've ever seen more even and perfectly spaced stitches." He paused again, feeling her distance. "How did you learn to suture like that?" he asked.
Julia smiled and said, "You would laugh if I told you."
Nathan smiled his crooked smile, and said "Miss Matthews, one thing I have learned about you, is that you never cease to surprise me. So, I don't think I would laugh at all. I would probably be impressed."
He was trying to get through her defenses, and she was having a hard time keeping them up. Julia reminded herself he was in the friend zone, and decided to share as if to a friend. "I learned how to suture on a raw chicken." She laughed at the memory, but was completely serious. "In Calgary, one of my nursing assignments was to assist a surgeon, who was very meticulous. He didn't like suturing, so he wanted me to do it after each procedure. He gave me a test, made me suture on a raw chicken, to make sure my skills were good enough to work with him. I didn't pass his test." She paused, smiling and remembering his quirky personality. "The next day, he brought in 7 more raw chickens for me to practice on. And, left me at it for the next three days, critiquing me hard. He had a very high standard, but with his coaching, I finally passed his test. I guess the positive is that I got really good at suturing. But after that, I couldn't eat chicken for a very long time." She told him with a laugh.
"You must have become a very popular nurse among the surgeons after that." Nathan said.
"I guess so. But, I was loyal to him, because he really did take the time to teach me. I stayed with him for about a year before he moved to Toronto for a prestigious surgical position." She smiled, "I worked with some really amazing doctors in Calgary, and learned a lot."
He finished his coffee and set the cup down. Julia asked, "Do you need anything else, Nathan?"
"I really wish I had something to read." He stated. Julia picked up his plate and coffee cup, and walked over to set them on the desk. Then she headed into her apartment to her stack of books. She picked up one of her favorite poetry books, and brought it to Nathan.
"You like poetry, right?" she asked, "I don't want to assume just because you quoted Emerson to me once."
Nathan looked at her, remembering the exchange they had shared at the overlook, when the sky had rendered them both speechless. "I do."
Julia handed him the book, The Poetical Works of Christina Georgina Rossetti. "This is one of my very favorites. Sorry it might be a little worn, it has traveled long and been read over and over." She left it with him, and went around the curtain to continue her tasks.
When Nathan opened the book, he discovered a delicate handmade needlepoint bookmark worn and tattered, marking her place. Who Has Seen the Wind? One of his favorites. He turned the page, I Loved You First: But Afterwards Your Love. He knew this one already, and found it to be one of the most romantic poems he had ever read. After he was done reading it, he decided maybe he should avoid poetry about this subject until he was out of the infirmary, and a little farther away from Julia. He quickly turned the page to the next one, and continued reading.
As Julia was writing at the desk, Florence came into the infirmary. She greeted Julia and sat down with her.
"Good morning, Florence, it's so nice to see you." Julia noticed Florence was holding a paper in her hand.
"I wanted to come by and see if Nathan was up for a visit? It's regarding the schedule Rosemary and I have put together for the ladies, and men, of Hope Valley to help out at his house. Everyone is really excited to pitch in and serve him for a change." Florence stated.
Julia said, "This is such a great idea, Florence. It will help take some of the burden off of Allie, and I know they will be happy to have regular visitors." She paused and said, "He's awake and reading, you can go right in and speak with him, Florence."
Florence walked behind the partition and she sat down beside Nathan. He closed the book when she entered and said, "Good morning, Florence."
"Good morning, Nathan. How are you feeling?" Florence asked.
"Better than yesterday or the day before," he said with a shy smile.
"Nathan, the community of Hope Valley all want to help out, while you are recovering. Rosemary and I put together a little schedule. I wanted to see if it's acceptable to you. We have meals coming every day, and someone to come and tidy up three times a week. And, various ladies have offered to take your laundry and do it with theirs, twice a week. Can you foresee anything else you would need help with?" Florence asked.
"Wow, Florence, this is amazing. You really don't have to do all this." Nathan said, humbled.
"Nathan, everyone in Hope Valley loves and respects you. We would all like the opportunity to give back for all that you do for us, everyday. We don't always remember to say how much we appreciate you, so please, let us now show you." Florence paused then, and added, "I have also arranged for your groceries to be delivered. Whenever you need something, make us a little list and have Allie drop it at the mercantile. Everything will be at your doorstep by the end of the day," she finished.
"I don't know what to say, Florence." Nathan said.
"Say, yes. And, let us take care of you, for once." Florence said simply.
Nathan was truly humbled. "Please tell everyone thank you for me." he said.
"I will let you get back to your reading and go hang this up in the mercantile", referring to the calendar. "Just let me know if you need anything that we didn't think of." Florence said, and she rose to leave. "We wish you a quick recovery, Nathan."
"Thank you, Florence. Give my greetings to Ned," he replied. And, with that she headed out of the infirmary, waving bye to Julia on her way out.
Julia came back in and asked, "Nathan, before you go home, I can help you get dressed in the shirt Bill brought for you. But, first, do you want to wash up?"
"That would be great, at least for now, Julia. But, what I would really like is a bath. Any chance Faith would allow that when I get home?" He asked.
"I think that would be the best thing for you, actually. It would probably do a lot of good for your sore ribs. Faith had to step out, but I can ask her when she gets back." Julia said, and went back around the curtain to prepare a basin for him to wash up.
Julia came back with a tray holding a washcloth, soap, toothbrush, toothpaste, and a basin of warm water. Julia set it across his lap with a small towel. She exited so he could have privacy.
Almost as soon as she sat down at her desk, Nathan called out from behind the curtain, "Julia, do you think you could help me with something, please?" She was hesitant to enter, but took a deep breath and came around the curtain. "I would love to take this half shirt off. Any chance of that?" he asked.
Julia looked at him for a moment, wondering the least painful way to get him out of what was left of his Henley and undershirt. She had an idea and went to get the scissors.
Julia silently cut both shirts at his right shoulder. This left only a small piece to take over his head, and a second larger piece to slide off his right arm. Julia tried not to notice his bare chest, as she worked. She swallowed hard and kept her gaze on the task at hand. When he was free of the shirt, she exited behind the curtain. She slumped into her chair, nearly missing it, and let out a very long, deep breath.
After about ten minutes, Nathan called out. "Jules, all done here. How about that shirt?"
Her eyes went as big as saucers. How could she have forgotten to give him the shirt? Julia awkwardly stood up and went to take the shirt from the coatrack in the back of the infirmary. She brought it over to him. He was sitting with his chest exposed and a towel draped over his shoulders. She was trying her very best not to notice the perfect chiseling of his chest and the very soft dusting of dark hair close to his sternum. Julia busied herself looking down at the shirt, and struggled to open the buttons. Her nerves were not helping. She chided herself for not having done this part before she walked in, so she didn't have to awkwardly stand there so long, struggling with the darn buttons, pretending not to notice how nice he looks without a shirt. Finally, the last button opened. She came around to his left side and gently pulled off the towel. Nathan lifted his left hand awkwardly while she pushed it through the armhole. Slowly and gently, she eased the shirt up his arm, taking care not to disrupt the bandage at his shoulder. He raised up a little so she could keep the back of the shirt behind him as she passed over to his right side. He put his right hand through the arm hole and she helped him get the fabric adjusted right around his shoulder. Once Julia got this far, the realization hit her that he would not be able to do the buttons up. She would have do it.
First, Julia removed the tray with the basin, and the towel, and set them to the side. Then she sat in front of him on the edge of the bed and gently tugged the two sides of the shirt together until they met in the middle. She started buttoning about the third row down, knowing he liked it that way. First button. Nathan looked at her so intensely as she buttoned, her heart was doing flip flops. Julia made the mistake of looking up at him, and his gaze was so piercing, she could hardly breathe. She hoped he wouldn't notice her hands trembling. She had to make herself look down and focus on the buttons, before her hands would work again. Julia moved down to the next button and got it done up. Second button. She quickly moved down one more, and got it buttoned. Three buttons was enough. She looked up at him again and managed to whisper, "Will that do?"
Nathan let out a slow breath and slowly nodded. Julia stood quickly and exited, nearly at a run, hoping he didn't notice. She went straight outside to get some air. She sat on the bench outside for a long time. When Faith walked up, she saw Julia sitting outside, and came to sit beside her.
"Are you ok, Julia?" Faith asked. Julia knew she could be honest with Faith.
"I don't know. Every time I think I get my emotions in check, something blows it all out of the water." Julia said truthfully. "I'm trying to guard my heart, but it's not going very well."
Faith looked at the ground, and then back at her friend. "Julia, perhaps when we get him home, you can take a day or two off. Or at least, a few days off from house calls at the Grant residence?"
"Really, you would do that? I think it would help a lot, Faith. I just need a little less…proximity, and some time to get my feelings in order again." Julia surmised.
"You are doing a stellar job of making his care your utmost priority." Faith stated. "But, it's not healthy for you to just keep pushing everything down. I'm happy to give you some time, and as much as you need."
"Thank you so much, Faith. I will take you up on that, as soon as we get him home and settled." Julia said as she smiled gratefully. With that light at the end of the tunnel, her resolve returned and she was ready for the next challenge.
"Faith, he asked to take a bath when he gets home. Do you think that is possible?" Julia asked.
Faith responded, "That would actually be really good for him."
Julia pulled a folded paper from her apron pocket, unfolded it and handed it to Faith. "I wanted to show you something I found in a recent medical journal."
Faith read the article and looked over at Julia nodding. "It looks like a great idea, and he would be the perfect candidate for us to try it out." She said. "When we get him home, let's set him up the bath, and leave him a while to soak." Faith paused, "Then we can try this out. I'll pack up all the supplies we would need in my medical bag." She looked at Julia then, "It won't be too uncomfortable for you, to do that?"
"Well, I really think this treatment would help him. And, it really couldn't be more awkward than what I just did in there." Julia motioned back at the infirmary. "I had to cut off the old shirt and get him in the new one."
Faith nodded then, understanding. "Well, I will be with you the whole time, to help lessen the…awkwardness."
"Thank you, Faith." Julia paused.
"You know what would really help?" Faith asked with a sly smile.
"No, what?" Julia asked, a little suspicious of what Faith was about to say.
Faith said, "It would really help if he wasn't so…dreamy." and just like that, both she and Julia were laughing, remembering the night she and Fiona had teased Julia about his dreaminess.
"Very funny." Julia said, but it did seem to lighten her mood. Julia was so thankful for Faith, and her sweet friendship.