Chapter 46. Walk in the Rain

On Sunday morning, Julia rolled over and felt that sweet, giddy, feeling of love overtake her once again. Somewhere between sleeping and waking she had remembered that the events of last night were not just a dream, but a reality that she had been so very fortunate to live out, in the flesh. She loved Nathan Grant, and he loved her.

She rolled over in the bed again and buried her face in the pillow, unable to believe the feelings she felt. And well, since she couldn't sleep anyway, she decided to get up and get ready for church. Even after taking her time, she was still quite early, so she went for a walk.

She walked up the path past the church and continued on climbing until she arrived at the first meadow. She was not sure she had time to go all the way up to her meadow, so she decided to turn around there. She walked back down in the sunshine, thinking how perfectly white the clouds looked against the deep blue sky. It was a beautiful day.

When Julia arrived at the church, people were conversing outside. She waited out front talking to Rosemary, until she saw her lovely trio arriving from the row houses. Nathan was walking up with Allie and his mother, and they seemed to be heading in her direction.

When they got to her, Allie came and gave Julia a big hug and said, "Good morning, Miss Matthews. Good morning, Mrs. Coulter."

"Good morning, Allie." Julia and Rosemary both said. Julia looked over at Rebecca and said, "Good morning, Rebecca." Rebecca greeted both Julia and Rosemary.

And finally, Nathan. "Good morning, Nathan." Julia said quietly and nervously, as she looked up at him.

"Good morning, Jules." He replied, smiling ever so cutely at her. He seemed different somehow. Julia saw something new in his eyes that made her heart melt. She was suddenly aware that the sight of him had definitely put color on her cheeks.

Everyone started to go into the church, so Nathan casually took her hand as they all walked in together. They sat in their usual spot, the four of them in a row.

The service was really good, as usual. Joseph spoke about unconditional love, and taught from the story of the prodigal son. When the service was over, everyone filed outside and talked on the lawn. Allie ran off with her friends.

As soon as they exited through the door of the church, however, Julia realized how hot it had become outside. It was stifling, and the air was heavy.

Nathan, his mother, and Julia stayed and spoke a little while to Rosemary and Lee. When she and Nathan were about to head home, Rebecca asked, "Julia, would you like to join us for Sunday lunch today?"

Julia looked up at Nathan who looked happy about the idea. "I would love to, Rebecca. Thank you." Julia replied.

So, the three walked back to Nathan's house together. When they entered, there was a lovely smell. Rebecca had obviously left something slowly roasting while they were at church.

Julia offered to set the table, and Nathan came to help her. Just as she turned from taking out the silverware, he came close and leaned over her head to take down the glasses. Julia looked up at him and smiled, and before he turned to take the glasses to the table, he planted a gentle kiss on her forehead.

When the table was all set, the three sat down to eat together. Rebecca had prepared a lovely pot roast with vegetables. Nathan prayed and they started to pass around the serving dishes.

"Mom, it looks so delicious." Nathan stated. "Sunday roast is one of my favorites."

"Allie's missing out." Julia stated, with an excited smile.

Rebecca said, "Don't worry, I'll keep her a plate and she'll eat when she gets home."

"Do you have big plans after school gets out?" Julia asked them both.

"Well, Allie and I usually spend a few days camping and fishing up at my meadow, but I'm not sure I should be sleeping on the ground right now." Nathan shared.

"No, I don't think that would do you any good, physically. But, maybe in two or three weeks time you can ride again, and make round trips up there. Or later in the summer, I'm sure you can consider camping." Julia replied.

Rebecca looked at both of them and said, "I'm starting to wonder when I could consider going back home. I know you probably don't want to think about it. But, I do eventually have to return to the ranch. Charlie can't hold down the fort forever."

Nathan looked sad to even have to consider it. But somewhere in the back of his mind he had known it was inevitable. "Mom, I understand. I'm able to do a lot more now. It's been so wonderful having you here, I haven't been ready or willing to consider when it could be time for you to go." He paused, "But it's not fair to you to not talk about it."

"Julia, could I possibly consider leaving in two weeks time?" Rebecca asked.

Nathan realized two weeks would be Julia's birthday, so he said, "Perhaps not exactly two weeks, Mom. The 23rd is Julia's birthday. So maybe sometime later that week?"

Julia was touched that he had remembered, and looked suddenly shy. Rebecca looked at her and said, "Yes, I wouldn't want to depart on your birthday, Julia. So I will call and talk with Charlie and see about a departure late that week."

Julia said, "Rebecca, you don't have to stay on my account. However, I'm certainly not ready for you to leave. Feel free to do what you need to do." She paused and then added, "As far as Nathan's recovery goes, I think the worst is behind him. He should be able to take back most of his normal duties and activities in a week's time."

They ate in silence for a while, the thought of Rebecca's departure had put a sort of damper on things. When they had all finished eating, Rebecca and Julia carried the plates into the kitchen. She got out the coffee and tea cups and some cookies.

They had tea and coffee together and talked about Allie's exams, and more plans for the summer.

When they were done, Julia rose to help clean up. But, Rebecca shoo'ed her from the kitchen. So, Julia and Nathan went into the living room together.

Julia walked over to the bookshelves and was just going to pull out something to read when Nathan asked her, "Jules, would you like to take a walk with me?"

Julia replied, "With you? Anytime."

Nathan walked over to the kitchen to let his mother know. And, as they walked out the front door, Nathan held the door open for her. When Julia walked outside, the heat hit her again.

"It's a hot day." Nathan said as he felt it, too. "We should stick to the forest where it's cooler, for our walk."

"Sounds great to me." Julia agreed.

Nathan took her hand as they walked down the front steps and towards the forest. It was nice to finally be alone and talk.

"How did you sleep last night, Jules?" He asked her smiling contentedly.

"Very well, thank you. And you, Lawman?" She asked.

"I think I dreamt about our next date." Nathan answered. "Already."

"And, just what did we do on our next date, Lawman?" She asked, curious and playful.

"Well, I can't tell you. You will just have to say yes to the date, to find out." He teased her.

"Yes." She gave him her yes right away. He laughed, smiling down at her. And then she teased him some more, "Or do I need to say yes two times?"

He was amused by her cute flirtations. She was fun, and he loved that about her. "Well, it always boosts a man's confidence to hear it twice." He joked.

"Yes. Two times." Julia responded, smiling coyly at him. "Are you boosted?"

"How could I not be, Jules? The most beautiful woman in Alberta just said yes to me. Twice." He said with a tender, proud smile.

She let out a deep breath at his sweet comment. "I'm defenseless when it comes to you, Nathan." She said, smiling unabashedly at him. "How could I ever say no? It would be impossible, not just because you are probably one of the most handsome men ever to wear the serge, but also because I know your character. You are handsome inside and out. So, I'm pretty sure I'll say yes to you for as long as you keep asking." She concluded. He liked that, and he took her hand and kissed it.

They kept walking a good long while up the path. At a certain point, where Julia had never noticed before, there was a fork. Now, Julia had always taken the right at the fork, and that path climbed up to her meadow on the front of the mountain, the side facing Hope Valley. But, this time Nathan took the left of the fork. A way that Julia had never really even noticed because of the way the path turned right.

"Where does this lead?" Julia asked.

"This path continues around to the north side of the mountain, the far side, and overlooks the next valley. Eventually it continues on connecting many small valleys until you reach Brookfield." Nathan said.

"Where Gabe is posted?" Julia asked.

"Exactly. And after Brookfield you can continue on for a very long time all the way North." Nathan stated.

"I've never taken this way before and I didn't even realize there was a turn out." Julia said.

"It's a little hidden, and leads to one of Allie's favorite places. It's way too far to go on foot, but there is a high overlook that's just beautiful. We call it Allie's overlook because she loves to go there." He paused and pointed, "It's a straight shot once you take this turn out, but you would need to be on horseback to get there." Nathan told her, then he continued, "But this first part is flat and it's a nice little walk."

As they walked on a little bit farther, they started to feel a few light sprinkles of rain. They brushed it off, thinking it unlikely to rain today. However, the rain slowly picked up. They stayed under the trees, but it slowly began to rain harder and harder, until it was really coming down. Finally, Nathan began looking for cover. But it had been so hot, and the rain felt so refreshing, that Julia just decided to walk out from under the trees and enjoy the cool rain.

For a few moments, Nathan stood frozen watching her as she stood in the rain. Julia slowly extended her arms out at her sides, and did a little spin...in the rain. She looked so beautiful and carefree as she turned, that he felt his breath catch. Puddles started to form and Julia didn't even try to avoid them, as she spun around again. The way her dress began to cling to her, and her wet hair and skirts flared out after her, made his heart rate quicken. She stopped and looked at him watching her. She stood for a few minutes motionless, cemented in place. Taking him in, his clothes now soaked through, his shirt clinging to his muscled arms and chest.

She put her hand out to him, beckoning him out from under the trees, fully out into the rain, now falling down in huge clunky drops. Nathan came to her and took her hand and they danced a minute there, laughing and enjoying the cool of the rain, and each other. Being together.

They clung to each other and spun around, to the perfect music of the rain, music only they could hear. Around and around they went, happy and smiling. And then, somehow, he spun her and lost grip of her hand in the slippery wetness. She stayed sure on her feet, and managed to stop, but she was now some distance from him. She looked disappointed for the disconnection, but stood there a minute looking at him, still smiling softly and taking him in. His hair curly and falling across his forehead now, his eyelashes wet and curly.

He took her in too, looking at him like that, with her dress soaked through and clinging to every curve of her body. Her hair wet with soft chunky curls falling down all around her shoulders. Her cheeks were rosy and her lips glistened in the rain. Nathan found her breathtaking, and he could only gaze at her with all the longing that he felt, welling up from deep inside of him.

Julia felt the longing too and she stood gazing back at him, time seemed to stand still. Her expression turned serious and she was overcome with the desire to be close to him. She started walking toward him, slowly and timidly at first, but as she neared he saw the urgency in her eyes. He started moving towards her too, but she came quickly now, careful not to crash into him, but she came with an urgency still. As she arrived against his chest, and took to her tiptoes, she put her hands behind his neck and gently but eagerly pulled his head down. She brought her lips close to his, and he met her, something akin to fire exploding between them. They kissed passionately. A slow hunger that quickly deepened, as they both relished the feeling of closeness, of union. Nathan delighted in kissing her, and knowing the softness and taste of her lips. When the kiss deepened, he explored her more fully, and was overcome again by the feelings welling up inside him at their deep connection. One hand was in her hair now, the other arm pulling her closer against his chest, pressing her body to his. When they were overcome by emotion, Julia pulled back a little to catch her breath.

Their foreheads still pressed together, they looked at each other smiling, and both panted heavily.

She whispered, softly, wistfully, "Nathan, I feel myself falling even more …" her mouth in a gentle and timid smile, "… for you."

"It's not so bad, is it, the feeling of falling?" He asked, knowing the very same feeling. Each kiss seemed to call him deeper into her ocean.

"Not at all." She said confidently, the corners of her mouth slowly turning up, "Not with you."

And it was he who kissed her this time, passionately, deeply, wanting to know her more. The fire that he felt was all the way to his toes now, and when their lips finally parted, they were breathless and completely soaked through.

By the time they walked back to Hope Valley, both Nathan and Julia were a little chilled. Nathan walked her home, and said good-bye with a gentle kiss at her door. When he was gone, she got out of her wet clothes and read for a little while. She still felt chilled, so she took a long hot bath. As she sat in the bath she thought of their kisses in the rain. In fact, that was all she could think about. There was such an intense connection between them, a fire that could not be denied. Her insides turned to mush every time she even thought about Nathan Grant, let alone when he kissed her.

All the years of wondering if love, like that which she had read about in novels or heard about in her own parents' story, could really exist. And, now she was absolutely sure it could, because it was exactly what she felt with Nathan Grant. At the thought of him she could giggle like a schoolgirl, be completely undone by who he is, or feel a longing and a desire like she had never thought possible. All in the same blink of an eye.

She was hopelessly in love with him. Nathan had slowly but surely invaded her heart and taken over. And she loved him completely and without reservation. Each and every part of him.

When she came out of the bath, she dressed in her bed clothes and brushed her wet hair. She looked in the mirror and couldn't get the silly, giddy smile off of her face. She tried to stop smiling, but no matter how hard she tried, it came right back. She started to towel dry her hair and was nearly done when she heard a light knock on her door.

She stood, frozen and panicked as she was already in her bed clothes. She looked at the clock, 8:42 p.m. Who would come by at this hour? Was there an emergency? Who was hurt? Her mind raced as she went towards to the door.

Tap. Tap. Tap. There it was again. She knew that knock. She put on her coat and buttoned it up tight. She pulled her damp hair over to one side, grabbed the lit oil lamp, and opened the door.

Nathan. There he was, standing down on the ground about five steps back from her front door. She stepped out on the stoop of her little back porch, just a step up from him but still far away.

"Nathan? Is everything ok? Is someone hurt? Is it Allie?" She questioned, clearly alarmed.

"No, no one's hurt, everyone's fine. Everything is a little too fine, actually." He said, as the same giddy smile spread across his face. She looked down at her bare feet to try to hide her own giddy smile.

"Jules, I'm sorry to come by so late, but I didn't think I would be able to sleep until I ask you something." Nathan breathed.

"Do you want to come in?" She asked, unsure but not wanting to leave him out in the cool night air. She could see his hair, like hers, was still wet.

Nathan looked down at the ground and chuckled gently, "No, I don't think that would be a good idea." He answered, keeping his distance. "Maybe we can just talk here? Here seems…safer."

Julia nodded and hung the lamp up on the hook by her door and pulled her coat tighter around her.

"Jules, I am a man of integrity, or at least I try to be. And, after that kiss today," Nathan had to swallow, and paused to take a deep breath, just thinking about it, "I won't be able to sleep tonight, until I set the record straight."

Julia suddenly looked embarrassed, and said, "I'm sorry if I was too forward. I just don't really know how these things are supposed to go…" she hoped he was not disappointed in her.

He laughed then, "Jules, I'm not questioning the kiss, or kisses, not for a minute. I loved everything about kissing you. And, it was not just you kissing, I was right there with you. One hundred percent on the same page." He gave her his charming crooked smile, "And I can't stop thinking about that kiss, actually. How authentic and romantic and perfect it was. That is not even part of my question." He looked down at the ground then, and then back up at her. "It's just that we had decided to take things one day at a time, but it's obvious we have intense feelings for each other. And then, the kisses…" he paused, "in my eyes, it makes things a little more serious than what we had previously defined our relationship to be."

Julia started to realize where he was going with this. Was he worried they were moving too fast?

"Nathan, I too, should be honest with you about something." Maybe this information would help set his mind at ease. Julia had struggled with whether or not to tell him, but decided he deserved to know. "You are the only man I've ever kissed."

At that confession, he realized their kisses were also a big step for her, one she did not take lightly. And he took a physical step towards her. She didn't move, but kept her gaze fixed on him.

Nathan realized she deserved to know something important about him, too. Something he'd never told anyone. Though he had been interested in girls before, and even been on a few dinner dates, he had never kissed any of them. He had been too shy at first, and then later, he had kept himself for the one. Nathan had thought for a while it was Elizabeth, but he had never kissed her.

He took one more step, and said in a whisper, "The kisses were a first for me too." She smiled big then and looked relieved at his confession. She had felt insecure sharing with him the he was her first kiss. But it was wonderful that she had been his first, too.

Nathan smiled at the knowledge that all of his firsts would be her firsts; and he imagined all the firsts they would get, together.

Nathan tried to get back to the point he was trying to make. "I feel like with the kisses, and the sharing of our feelings last night, things just got more serious between us. Which, is a good thing, Jules." He said, unable to hide his very content smile. "Today was the second time I have kissed you but I seem to have forgotten my manners. There is something very important I should have asked you first, as a gentleman." He suddenly looked nervous but certain, "And Jules, I really want to ask it." He paused and let that sink in. "I'm sorry if I did things a little out of order. But, when it comes to you, I don't seem to have a lot of say-so over my feelings." Another step forward. "Jules, what I want to know is if we can move our relationship to the next level? I would like to court you. Would you enter into a courtship with me?" He asked, with a confident smile.

Julia fixed her gaze on him, and with certainty in her eyes, deep and blue, she said, "Yes." All the love that she felt she put into that one word. Yes. She took a step forward then, just to the edge of her little stoop.

Then, he walked the last two steps to her, and since he stayed down the little step, they stood almost eye to eye. He reached for both of her hands and gazed at her, with longing and love. He leaned forward and she met him, and he kissed her once again, gently at first. All the feelings between them came to the surface, and the kiss deepened. They explored each other in the kiss, and delighted in each other.

Her arms came behind his neck and one of his moved to her back to pull her in closer. However, as he did so, he was suddenly reminded that she was already in her bed clothes and without a corset or any other stays. He felt every curve of her back and his breath caught. She opened her eyes in surprise and he looked at her, frozen for just a second, lips not parting but completely frozen in the kiss. But he saw the sides of her mouth slowly turn up, and he knew he was forgiven for his accidental advance. They pulled back just an inch and looked at each other for a brief moment, embarrassed but smiling, each breathless from the kiss.

Until Nathan couldn't wait any longer, and he kissed her yet again. Relishing and enjoying the feeling of her in his arms. Of holding her so close, every curve of her body against his, of kissing her lips, and knowing her mouth.

Nathan was completely and helplessly in love with Julia Matthews. All other mistaken affections, all other previous attentions with anyone else, faded away, were blown away like chaff. Nothing could compare to this, to kissing her, to holding her, to being near her, his girl, his true love. Loving her had become vital, and he realized that she was the only person he ever wanted to love.

As their lips parted, he looked at her, letting the love he felt clearly show on his face. Being as real with her as he had ever been, even more so than the night before. And he saw the love he felt reflected right back at him, in her eyes. She placed one palm affectionately on his cheek, and her heart was fully open to him. Neither said a word, they just tenderly gazed at one another, and all that needed to be said, without even being said, was clearly shared between them.

When they finally and reluctantly parted, Nathan stepped back slowly, but kept her hand in his, as long as possible. Never breaking his intense gaze, he whispered, "Good night, my darling."

She fully met his intense gaze and whispered back, "Sweet dreams, my Nathan." He liked that immensely, my Nathan.

And he slowly let her hand drop as he turned to go. He looked back over his shoulder one more time before he rounded the corner, and smiled lovingly at her once more.