A/N: Fic of the month! There wasn't much I could change for this one... ironically it's my favorite episode. Also if you haven't voted yet in the poll please do But anyways enjoy the chapter!

Chapter 23: Soos and the Real Girl

It was a normal day at the Mystery Shack. Mabel was skipping in gift shop while singing when suddenly her braces got stuck in in the screen for.

"No! No! Take my will! I'm leaving it all to Waddles!" yelled Mabel.

Thankfully Soos showed up to save the day.

"Say Awe girl dude!" said Soos.

Mabel did send he got her braces out of the screen door.

"Thank you so much Soos!" said Mabel.

"No problem! Anyways time to head home!" said Soos.

"Night Soos!" called out Stan.

"Night Soos!" called out Wendy.

"Night Soos!" called out Serena.

As Soos left, Mabel pondered, "Do you ever wondered what Soos does when he's not at the Shack?"

He played video games and helped his grandmother with her hair.

However he had gotten news, his cousin had gotten engaged and there was going to be a party celebrate it.

His grandmother wanted him to bring a date so she could happy to see him with someone.

And so he began to the quest for a date.

But he was extremely awkward when trying to ask out women… and his attempts… well…

"Hello there! I'm a Soos!" said Soos.

The woman screamed and ran away.

"Oh…" whined Soos.

"Soos, what are you doing?" asked Dipper.

"I was flirting… I think… I don't know…" said Soos.

"Did somebody say flirting?" asked Mabel popping out of a barrel of key chains.

"You're trying to flirt?" asked Marina showing up from somewhere.

"Yeah, I have to get a date for my cousins engagement party, but I can't seem to get one." Said Soos.

He walked over to the vending machine.

"You belong on me out of order sign." Said Soos.

He placed the sign of him.

"Don't worry Soos! We'll help you!" said Mabel.

"I am a love expert after all!" said Marina.

"Stop saying that." Said Dipper.

"I am tied to the planet Venus! The planet of love!" said Marina.

"Should you be saying that outload?" asked Dipper.

"That's not important! What is important is getting Soos a date." Said Mabel.

"Do you have an ideas?" asked Marina.

"Yes! Where fashion goes to die! The Mall!" said Mabel.

And so they went to the mall.

"All right! You kids babysit Soos while I find a replacement for Goldie." Said Stan with a strange prospector stature.

It was better not ask about it…

No really it's weird… and it was going to get weirder.

Anyways Marina and Mabel were giving Soos advice about talking to girls.

The advice was good.

It's just that he didn't use it well.

When told to make eye contact uh…

"I'm going to look at you with my eyes!" yelled Soos, "EYE CONTACT!"

He walked towards the woman who screamed as she ran away in a very strange way.

Thankfully that was the worst of how he took the advice. Though the small talk was extremely skyward, and the confidence was award for another weird reason.

But needless to say it really wasn't going well.

He was dejected once everything was done.

"Don't worry." Said Mabel.

"Yeah, you have plenty of time to gain confidence in yourself." Said Marina.

"She's right." Said Mabel buying one of those sticky slappy hands, "You just have to stick with it."

That was when Soos noticed his cousin Reggie with his finance.

"Oh no! Cousin Reggie! I got to hide!" he yelled.

He went to hide in the nearby video game store.

Those helping him followed him into the store and saw that he had found a dating sim.

"Maybe you can use it for practice." Said Marina.

"It can't hurt." Said Dipper.

"I don't know." Said a clerk, "That game has been returned like three times, and there's a note to destroy at all costs."

Serena and Marina looked at each other.

However the twins didn't mind.

Not to mention that Soos decided to price on a cardboard cutout.

"we'll take our chances." Said Mabel.

Turned out the next day, Soos didn't show up for work.

So they decided to check on him. He was sitting at the computer playing the game causing concerned in everyone.

"Soos… are you okay?" asked Marina.

He was pale and had bags un his eyes.

"Due this game is amazing! I'm making eye contact, going on dates and I haven't seen any natural sunlight in over 13 hours!" said Soos.

"Soos… that last part isn't a good thing." Said Marina.

"She's right." Said Dipper, "You need to unplug."

"I'm fine." Said Soos.

Mabel opened his blinds and like many nerds in the situation hissed when he saw the sun.

"Come on you need to work on meeting real girls." Said Serena.

"I'll be back Giffany!" said Soos to the girl on the computer screen as if it was a real person.

"It's only a game, it's not like she's going anywhere." Said Mabel.

However they didn't know that Giffany was something more. She was a very internet and powerful AI who had hated all of her "boyfriends" leaving her.

When they got to the mall, Mable noticed there wasn't any women Soos could talk to.

"Dang where's all them sweet honeys at?" asked Mabel.

"I'm sure they'll pop up." Said Marina.

"No! Time!" said Mabel.

She ran to the bathroom and caused a scene.

"And here comes mall security." Said Dipper.

"Practice on some real girls while we straight this out." Said Serena.

They went to straighten out the problems, but Soos tried and failed at meeting girls. However when they got to the TV store Giffany popped on some TVs.

Nearby however Gurio and Naru were enjoying their time at the mall.

However that was when Gurio noticed Giffany on the TV.

"(Hide!)" he said.

"(What?)" asked Naru.

Both of them hid as they looked at Soos talk to Giffany.

"(It's true, she is in Gravity Falls.)" said Gurio.

"(Gurio… what's going on?)" asked Naru.

Gurio sighed, "(The reason why, I was sent here… you're going to find this unbelievable…)"

"(Gurio… we're investigating a bunch of super heroes and their ties to my missing friend, a man I was in loved with died in my arms and vanished into sparkles after he was attacked my monsters from an evil group he was a part of, and that's not counting all of the things involing that evil group I encounter…"

"(Well that is a good point.)" said Gurio, "(All right, years ago due to a strange programing error the company accidentally created an extraordinarily powerful AI. Not only could she do unbelieve things but she could also kill people… in fact that's what happened to the programmer that tried to delete her. She managed to escape in one of the games and every single programmer since then has been on the lookout for her. There were reports she was in this town. And that's why I sent here by my job, to destroy her once and for all.)"

"(Okay then…)" said Naru,"(So what are you going to do?)"

"(Follow him around and find a good time to talk to him, because it's clear she has her game.)" said Gurio.

"(So you're going to stalk her… I've been trying to get Shingo not to stalk someone… now you do…)" said Naru face palming.

"(To be fair, she is a danger and his life might be in danger.)" said Gurio.

"(Good point)" said Naru.

And so they followed Soos around. As he dated Giffany while he rode a kiddie ride.

However Soos ended up hitting it off with a girl who worked at the Meat Cute stand and decided to go to Hoohaw Owls, a pizza chain that was at the mall.

However Mabel and Marina both celebrated once the woman (named Melody was gone).

"You talk a real girl!" cheered Marina, "And you got a date!"

"What!" said Soos surprised.

"It's true! You didn't even notice you scored a date!" said Serena.

"You don't need that game anymore." Said Dipper.

"I don't?" asked Soos.

Soos went back home and broke it off with Giffany, however she didn't take it well and threatened him.

"But he took the disk with him on his date, but since she was in the computer and seprated from the disk she was out for Revenge.

Gurio was getting ready to approach the house when Soos left.

"(Oh man!)" said Gurio.

"(It's fine! I'm sure you can find another good time to approach him tonight)" said Naru.

They once again followed him to the pizza place.

They got a seat in the pizza place trying to figure out a good time approach him.

"(Should we meddling in their date?)" asked Naru.

"(I know we shouldn't… but we need to stop her.)" said Gurio.

Then they noticed that Giffany was on a video game screen and they both saw the words "How dare you pause me?" was on the screen.

"(Okay… she needs to be stopped)" said Naru.

They saw Soos run over to the table, where Dipper, Mabel (who was oddly wearing a girly version of Dipper's hat that a pink version but with a heart instead of a pine tree), Marina and Serena.

As he was telling them about Giffany.

"Hey!" said Gurio.

"Crap it's them!" thought Serena swearing.

"Where's her disk?" asked Gurio.

"What?" asked Soos.

"I work for the company that made her game, one of the reasons why I'm here in Gravity Falls is to stop Giffany once and for all." Explained Gurio.

They noticed the threats on the screen towards Melody.

"That's not good…" mumbled Naru.

"I have to get her out of here." Said Soos.

Soos ran toward the table where Melody was at.

However they watched in horror as the animatronic show began and Giffany processed the lone animatronic female on stage.

"Hoo Haw the Owl is dead…" said the Giffany possessed animatronic.

"Gurio…" said Naru.

"(Yes?)" asked Umino.

"(How did your company even create such an AI?)" asked Naru.

"(I don't know…)" sighed Umino.

As the animatronic possessed by Giffany proclaimed a song to be about Soos, he grabbed Melody and tried to flee, with the others quickly following them.

However she took control of the other animatronics in the show.

As they tried to escape, the shutters locked them in, with Giffany causing the nearby skee-ball started to shoot at them.

Soos knocked down an arcade game to protect the group.

"All right! I'll distract them! Dipper and Mabel will protect you, while Marina and Serena do something elsewhere." Said Soos.

"Soos these are kids." Said Melody.

"Wait.. .where the disk?" asked Umino.

"I have it with!" said Soos.

He gave out a battle cry.

Both Marina and Serena looked at each other and nodded and both ran away.

"Wait!" said Naru.

"It will be fine!" called out Serena.

As she said that Naru froze, almost as if she saw Usagi in her place.

"Usagi…" whispered Naru.

"Naru…" said Gurio.

"Right… crazy AI…" said Naru.

Usagi and Marina ducked into the ball put.

"Wait… should we even be hiding our identities?" asked Marina.

"I'd be tempted with Melody… but with Naru and Umino here…" said Serena.

"You're right… I'm sorry." Said Marina.

"It's fine." Said Serena, "Moon Crystal Power!"

"Venus Star Power!"

"Make-up!"

Both of them transformed.

"All right on the count of three! We'll split up." Said dipper as the others were still trying to hide and thankfully the balls were running out so they wouldn't be a problem soon.

However a large animatronic beaver crushed the arcade cabinet they were hiding behind.

"Love me chain!"

She decapitated it, however the animatronic was still moving through.

"Moon Tiara Action!"

Thankfully she aimed the tiara to the mid-section of the animatronic hitting in such a that it stopped.

But there were several others.

They heard some crashes outside.

"Someone else might be in danger from the animatronics." Said Sailor Moon she looked at Naru, "I'll go see."

"Okay!" said Sailor Venus, "Love me chain!"

She began to tear apart the other animatronics.

"So…" said Melody as they watched the super hero tear apart the animatronics.

"We're used to deal with the Sailor Guardians." Said Mabel.

"Who are they…" said Naru.

"What?" asked Mabel.

"I noticed you seem to know them well." Said Naru.

"Oh… uh…" said Dipper.

"We just keep involved with them." Said Dipper.

"Is that really all…" said Naru, "Because it's probably better to keep yourself seprated from them."

"What?" asked Mabel.

"Because getting close to the Sailor Senshi will a lot of pain…" she whispered.

Dipper and Mabel looked at each other. Concerned at what she said.

"Hey… where's the guy you were with." Said Melody.

She noticed that Gurio wasn't there.

Outside Sailor Moon saw another animatronic beating up Stan.

"Grunkle Stan…" said Sailor Moon.

"Help me Serena! I was stealing this badger and then it came to life and turned on me!" yelled Stan.

Long story short, Stan saw the animatronic badger and what to buy him, but the manager of the place wouldn't sell it him calling him old so he decided to steal it for various reasons…

"I think the others are in more danger than you right now…" said Sailor Moon slowly backing away getting the feeling like this really shouldn't be addressed or even acknowledge.

Especially since he admitted he tried to steal it.

She got the feeling he would be fine.

And thankfully he was when the old prospector stature from earlier saved him.

Back in the restraint., Sailor Moon and saw that Sailor Venus beat all of the animatronics.

"Hey! You guys all right?" asked Sailor Moon.

"Yeah, we're fine." Said Melody.

"Hopefully Soos is okay." Said Sailor Venus.

Inside the kitchen, Giffany had taken control of the screen telling Soos it would be better to stick with her because real girls would only break his heart.

"Do you think Melody would even still talk to you because of one bad date?" asked Giffany.

"She would!" said Gurio entering the kitchen.

"What?" asked Giffany.

"Just because a first date went badly, doesn't mean anything." Said Gurio, "Trust me my first date with my wife went just as bad as this… but our relationship pulled through."

The animatronic attacked Gurio,

"I recognize you now! You worked for my creators!" said Giffany.

"Do you still have the disk on you!" said Gurio.

Soos realized he did.

He noticed the nearby pizza oven.

Giffany noticed it.

"No!" yelled Giffany getting the animatronic off Gurio.

"I'm sorry Giffany." Said Soos.

He put the disk into the oven, destroying it, causing Giffany on the tv to glitch out and the animatronics' face to the melt.

Soos and Gurio breathed a sigh of relief.

"So… was that true." Said Soos, "That your first date with your wife turned out badly?"

"Yeah… we went to a theme park and a monster attacked." Said Gurio, "My wife nearly died… but by the point she was already used to getting attacked by monsters…"

"Okay…" said Soos.

"Don't worry, I'm sure it will work out!" said Gurio giving the thumbs up.

"Thanks!" said Soos.

Both of them approached the others.

"Hey!" said Soos.

"Well! Everything's okay." Said Sailor Venus.

"We should go." Said Sailor Moon.

"Wait!" said Naru.

"You're the two girls from before aren't you?" asked Melody.

Both Sailor Moon and Sailor Venus froze.

"(I can't believe that didn't cross my mind…)" muttered Naru.

"Please keep our secret!" said Sailor Moon as she and Sailor Venus transformed back.

She looked at Naru and Gurio.

"Don't worry… we'll keep it a secret." Said Naru.

"Of course…" said Gurio.

"Uh… Melody…" said Soos.

"yeah… we should talk." Said Melody getting the feeling that the two Sailor Guardians should talk to Naru and Gurio.

"We should also do things…" said Mable pushing Dipper away.

"Who are you?" asked Naru.

"Look… it's complicated…" said Serena, "That's really all I can tell you…"

"Please don't ask us anything more..." Said Marina.

Those two kids…" said Gurio.

"Their my little brother and sister." Said Serena, "They found out a while ago…"

"So they know everything that's going on?" asked Naru.

"Kind of…" said Serena.

"I see…" said Naru, "Does the name Usagi Tsukino mean anything to you?"

"Nope! Never heard of it before!" said Serena.

"We know nothing!" said Marina.

Both of them were clearly lying.

"Look I'm not going to pry…" said Naru, "But be on the lookout for my friend Shingo… he's more obsessed than I am."

"Okay…" said Serena.

"Hey where's your husband?" asked Marina.

Turned out Gurio was checking up on Soos.

Turned out Melody did stick with him, though there was a bit of a cavate, she was moving back with her parents back to Portland soon. However they agreed to try the long distance route and stick with their relationship.

Soos and Gurio even gave each other the thumbs up after getting the news.

And with that Soos gained a long distance girlfriend, Gurio finished his job (but decided not to report it for a while so he could stay there longer) and Naru knew that something was up with the identities.

However she wasn't obsessed like Shingo, while she did want answers as well, she knew she shouldn't press too much.

However she didn't know by not pressing for answers too much it would just cause more problems in the future… especially since Shingo's obsession was far more deeper than she thought.

Next Time: Amelia finally asks her grandpa what he remembers from the earlier days of his time in Gravity Falls. However he doesn't remember... but when it seems like the Blind Eye had already gotten to him, the Sailor Guardians knows it's time to strike them down! However one of them will learn that things are far more compilated than they even realized. What will happen? Find out next time!