Chapter 107. The Unexpected Coffee Date

On Wednesday morning, Jake dressed in plain clothes for his journey on the train. He packed his uniform in his bag, along with everything else he would need for a few days away. Then he headed for the Mountie office. He had a few things he needed to do there, before leaving, and he'd been too tired last night.

As he walked through town, Jake took in the view around him. This was his favorite time of day. The early morning fog had already been chased away by the sunshine warming the ground, but the town was not yet awake. It was the time of day he liked to call the lull - that was his very own made-up name for this beautiful, quiet, contemplative, optimistic, moment in time - that happened everyday. To him, a day was like a blank slate, when anything was possible, when hours spread before him like an unfamiliar mystery, ready to unfold - and he felt all of that ripe possibility, ever so keenly, in the lull.

It was also the time of day he would normally saddle Ranger and take off on rounds, up to the hills green and lush, up where he could think. But after the last few days, he was glad he didn't have to do such a menial task, even if a part of him did miss riding those rolling hills, as well as the opportunity to contemplate.

As he neared the Mountie office, he looked up one side the street and down the other, another of his regular habits in the morning. Everything seemed right as rain in his little town. And then, just before he climbed the steps, he glanced up.

And there, sitting in one of his chairs, was the beautiful Fiona Miller. And boy did she look beautiful sitting in his chair. He nearly tripped up the steps for shock of seeing her there. Was she waiting for him? She quite obviously took notice of his reaction, how her presence had completely thrown him for a loop, and she smiled. Not the normal shy smile she had been prone to give in his presence, as of late. But a different kind of smile. One that seemed to realize the affect she had on him, and somehow, wanted to reassure him.

Jake stopped at the top of the stairs and she stood. "Is everything okay, Fiona?"

"Yes." She looked suddenly shy now. He looked so much better than yesterday. He seemed rested and at peace, and that sparkle in his beautiful green eyes was back. "I was just…waiting for you. I heard you are leaving again."

Jake exhaled. "I'm off to testify at trial."

Fiona fidgeted with her hands. "My kidnappers."

Jake nodded slow. He wanted to ease any doubt. "They are going away for a long time, Fiona."

She nodded, glad to hear it. "That's not exactly why I'm here." Fiona looked nervous now, and he couldn't understand why. He just wanted her to be at ease with him, to feel comfortable in his presence. But as of late, there always seemed to be something keeping her on edge.

"Would you like to come in?" He asked her, unlocking the door.

"Yes. I would like that very much." She replied and he held open the door for her. When she walked past, he got a whiff of her perfume. That sent his senses reeling and he was glad to take his place behind the desk, to put all that space, and a huge wooden desk, between them.

"Please." He motioned to the chair opposite, and she sat. Then he sat, too.

He set his gaze on her and waited. "Jacob, I want to apologize." She met his gaze. "I'm sorry for the way I reacted when you tried to help me, outside of the saloon, after the baseball game. My reaction was…harsh and insensitive." She held his gaze. "And, I'm sorry."

Jake smiled easy. "It's okay, Fiona."

She wasn't letting herself off that easy. "No, it's not. You were being sweet and kind, and I yelled at you, in front of everyone. I owe you a huge apology."

Jake just kept that easy smile. He laid his hand on the desk, and when he did, somehow, it seemed to fall exactly halfway between them. Fiona was sure it had been something entirely unconscious, that he wasn't even aware of, but she couldn't help but notice. His hand was just there…seeming to reach out across the gap between them. Part of her wanted to reach out from her side and close that gap, but she didn't.

"You don't owe me anything, Fi. But, I accept your apology." Jake held her gaze. "I forgave you already."

Fiona's brow wrinkled cutely. "How could you forgive me when I hadn't even apologized?"

Jake stood and moved toward the coffee pot. He said casually, on the way, "I forgave you about a minute after you yelled at me."

Her gaze never left him as he moved. And as he said that, her mouth fell completely open. She closed it quick before he noticed.

He glanced back over at her, holding up the coffee tin. "Coffee?"

Fiona managed a nod, and he went to work, scooping and pouring water and lighting the little stove. While the coffee was going, Jake leaned on the wall next to him and watched her.

Fiona stood up and walked over near the coffee pot. She looked at him sincere and said. "Thank you."

Jake couldn't imagine why that needed a thank you. "For coffee?"

She snorted low. "No! For forgiving me." She figured he was teasing her, but she stayed sincere, saw it through. "I was frustrated and I took it out on you."

As he held up that wall, Jake's gaze turned playful. "Which is completely understandable. I kept picking you up."

Fiona tilted her head and teased him right back. "Which is highly annoying for an independent woman."

Jake couldn't help himself. "I get it. We wouldn't want anyone to think that you are a pushover."

Fiona chuckled. "Exactly!"

Jake chuckled right back. "Do you honestly think anyone in this town could ever think that of you?"

Fiona put her foot down. Literally. "Well I hope not."

Jake teased some more. "It must have been rough making your mark with all those brothers."

Fiona just smiled at him. "It was! It could have been very easy to get lost in the crowd."

Jake smiled right back at her. "I find it very hard to believe that you, Fiona Miller, could ever get lost in a crowd." He paused. "You have a way of sticking out."

She liked that he thought that about her. Or was it just to him that she stuck out? Either way, she didn't care, she liked it. Maybe his opinion of her was more important to her than she realized. Maybe it meant more than anyone else.

The coffee gurgled, so he abandoned his wall, and poured two cups. He carried them toward the porch, and at the door, he looked back over his shoulder. "Well, are you coming?"

Fiona huffed and shook her head playfully, then followed him. He handed her a cup and they sat in the two chairs together.

He leaned his long muscular arm over half way, and held out his coffee cup. "Cheers."

Fiona smiled under her breath, met his cup and clanged, careful not to slosh. "Cheers."

She took a sip. He watched her and it was easy to read, by the look on her face, that her coffee was missing something. He had completely forgotten to ask. "Wait. What's missing? Milk or sugar?"

She leaned over, squinting her eyes from the bitterness. "Sugar?"

He set his cup down, and hopped up out of his seat. He brought out the sugar bowl, she took one cube and plopped it in. From his other hand, he very cutely produced a spoon. She took it and gave her coffee a little stir. Then another sip. "Perfect." He nodded, set the sugar bowl on his desk, and returned to his seat beside her.

"You sit out here every morning?"

Jake looked up and down the street, at his town, and then glanced back over at her. "Not usually. Though I should." He kept his eyes fixed on her. "Maybe it should become a habit." It sounded almost like an invitation.

"This is…pretty nice." She told him as she sipped again.

He looked off in the distance, suddenly wistful. "Hot coffee. Beautiful day. Independent lady. All that's missing is a view of the sea."

Fiona chuckled low. "You can say that again." She paused and looked around. "All we need is a gentle sea breeze."

"Salty air soothes the soul." He said softly, and she turned to look at him.

She added. "And some birds that float in mid-air, riding those updrafts off the sea."

He closed his eyes, as if he were listening. "Oh...and the melody of the gentle waves rolling and crashing along the rocky shore, in infinitum." It was virtually impossible to take her eyes off of him now.

They shared a love of the sea.

He opened his eyes and looked at her. "We might be from opposite coasts, but the sea is the sea."

"Salt water gets in the blood, I think." Fiona told him. "And makes the sea impossible to forget."

Jake agreed. "I miss it sometimes."

She looked in her coffee cup. "Me, too." She looked over at him. "So, are you a swimmer?"

Jake laughed. "Yes. And I do miss swimming, too."

Fiona wondered. "Were you a good swimmer? Did they have competitions in Peggy's Cove?"

"I was." He admitted. "And they did."

Fiona could surmise. Jake was built like a swimmer. "So you won all the competitions, did you?"

She could see by his face, he probably had. "Sometimes." He told her, though she was sure he was being modest. "And what about you, Fi, are you a swimmer?"

She smiled and looked out at the town. "Well, in my little town, you see - I didn't grow up in San Fransisco, but in a little town just outside. And, in my little town we had several swimming competitions. And my brothers won nearly all of them. But, those competitions were only for boys."

So therein lied the problem. An independent little brown-headed girl, with big brown eyes, pigtails, and lots of brothers, wanted to compete just like them. He could picture it already. "So what did you do?"

"Well I kept trying to enter, and they kept refusing me - on the basis of me being a girl." She told him.

"But, you didn't give up." He knew it already.

"Nope. I kept petitioning and asking, until they finally let me enter. A few other girls, too." Fiona told him.

Jake asked her. "And how did you do?"

She huffed. "Well not very well against a bunch of boys who didn't want girls to compete with them. They practically drowned us on purpose."

"But, that surely didn't stop you." He knew it hadn't.

Fiona told him with a cute grin. "Of course not. We just went back to petitioning and asking, till finally, they added a separate heat, and later, a separate race, for girls." He could picture her leading the charge against city hall, until the unfairness was put to rights.

"And you won those?" He asked her, though he could guess the answer already.

She smiled shy. "A few of them."

He tilted his head at her. She couldn't tell anything less than the truth when he looked at her like that. "Okay, several of them."

Jake was bowled over by the image of her, now so vivid in his mind - a young little spitfire rocket - petitioning and driving the mayor crazy, until he added a race for girls to his town's swimming competitions.

He laid his head back on the chair, as he looked at her and smiled crooked. He teased her, completely facetious. "I cannot imagine any of that, at all. It doesn't sound anything like you."

Fiona laid her head back on the chair, just like did, and gazed at him. "And you? Doesn't it sound completely like you, that you won't even tell me if you won or not? Would it hurt you to tell the truth? I won't for a minute think you are bragging." She was genuinely interested to know if he'd won or not, but for fear of sounding arrogant, he would never venture to answer honestly. "It's okay. I'll just ask Julia."

"Well, that's not playing fair." He teased her. He looked down the street for a moment, and then back at her. They had come so far this morning. "What about school? What subject did you like in school?" He asked her, raising his coffee cup for another sip.

"You are going to find me strange if I tell you." Fiona told him, her head still resting on the back of the chair.

"I would never find you strange, Fiona." He teased her. "If I haven't already."

"Haha." She told him dryly. "Okay. I'll tell you." She exhaled. "I always loved geography." He was not surprised. It had been his favorite subject, too. "I just love maps, learning about other countries, and other cultures."

Jake had guessed correctly. "And imagining all the places you could go."

She looked over at him and pointed her finger. "Yes!"

He continued. "And all the amazing ways to get there…boat, train, carriage, caravan, camel."

"Exactly!" She realized he was still watching her. "What about you?"

He held her gaze. "Same. Geography." He added. "I used to find new destinations I wanted to visit and map out the way to get there."

Fiona raised an eyebrow. "Do you still have places on your list? That you would like to visit?"

"Yep." He replied. "Many."

"And what's on the top of your list, Jacob?" She was terribly curious. "The destination that you'd most like to visit."

He didn't bat an eye. "The Grand Canyon."

She smiled over at him. "Oh, it's wonderful, Jake. It's the most beautiful place I've ever seen."

"You've been?"

"Yes. My family and I took a holiday there, many years ago. I was about ten, I think. It isn't all that far from San Fransisco." She told him. "The Grand Canyon is…amazing. Hard to describe…to put into words. Beautiful and unforgettable."

He nodded. Looking at her, he knew exactly how that was. "And you, what's at the top of your list?" He finished his coffee.

"Niagara Falls." She was also very quick to answer, didn't even need a second to decide.

"Fi, you would love it." He told her. "It's breathtaking. And...the rush, when you stand at the bottom."

"Oh, you've been? I'm so jealous." She told him, trying to imagine. "I've seen pictures in one of my father's old books."

"The pictures don't do it justice. When you stand there next to it, its surreal. The roar of the rushing water, the mist that envelopes you, and the sight - the water, all that unrelenting power, that never seems to end. It's incredible." He told her, trying his best to do right by such an amazing wonder.

She was taken by his description. "I want to go."

"You will." He told her, and realized how that sounded. He tried to correct. "One day, I believe."

"I hope so." Fiona answered. She stood up, came over next to him, and put out her hand. He handed her his empty cup, and she set them on his desk, next to the sugar bowl.

When she came back out, Jake was still sitting in his chair. Fiona walked right up close and ruffled his hair. His breath caught as he watched her, attention and hands in his hair.

"You, Constable Matthews, should come and see me in the barbershop, when you get back." Fiona teased. She seemed to have absolutely no idea the affect she was having on him.

Finally her eyes lowered, and when hers met his, she swallowed. He tried to act natural. "If you think it's too long, Miss Miller."

She brought her attention back up to his sandy hair, that was longer than she'd ever seen it. And apparently, when it was longer, it was wavy. "It's nice either way."

"A haircut couldn't hurt." He was well aware that he needed one already, but for obvious reasons, till now, he'd been avoiding the barbershop. Though he was pretty sure after this, his boycott would be over. In fact, he might become a regular - a very regular patron.

Jake glanced back at the clock and realized that soon their time would be up. He would need to catch to the stage coach soon. It hadn't rolled past yet, which was good. But, he couldn't miss it. "It's almost time, Fi."

Jake stood and moved past her. And as he did, his arm lightly brushed hers, sending her heart racing. She tried to pretend she hadn't felt it, but she was having a hard time, especially since he smelled so good.

He picked up his bag, and packed all the last minute things inside. He put everything in order, and took one last look around his office, before locking the door. Then he turned and slung his bag over his shoulder, facing her where she stood.

"Will you walk me to the stagecoach?" Jake asked, casually.

But for some reason, Fiona froze. Had that thrown her? "Jacob." She swallowed, and he couldn't discern her expression. "I don't know. That seems…defining."

Confusion took over his expression, where before, a smile had been. "What do you mean defining?"

"You know what I mean." Fiona told him. "People might see us and speculate."

It was only a walk to the stagecoach. "So we can't be seen together? As friends?" Jake challenged.

She challenged right back. "Is that what we are?"

He looked down at his feet and back up at her, squinting from the bright sunshine behind her now. "Let me guess, the ground suddenly feels unstable beneath your feet?"

Fiona took a step back. How could he know her so well? "No that's not it." She lied.

He nodded slowly. "It's funny. You have no problem to take risks in business."

"This is different." She told him.

"Is it? Am I so unstable an investment?" Jake wasn't backing down, it was time to define this.

Fiona looked up at him. "No. I never meant to imply that."

"Why is it so complicated, Fi? I was just asking you to walk me to the coach, as a friend, as…whatever. Two people that like each other and walk together. Why does it have to be so defining?" Why was she fighting him every step of the way?

She couldn't think of a good reason, actually. Other than she was afraid, but she could never voice that out loud. "Because other people will see and…make assumptions."

"And why would that bother you? You've never struck me as a girl who cares what others think?" There was nothing but truth in his words. He was right, she normally didn't care.

Fiona opened her mouth but couldn't find a proper response.

There was more to it, and he knew it, but he wanted to give her the benefit of the doubt. And the space she needed. He didn't want to push, Lord knows, he didn't intend to push. But, for a girl who liked to take risks she sure wasn't ready to lower that last wall. And he'd been trying to get over it for a while now.

"Look, Fi, we had such a nice talk, and it was a great morning." He glanced back at the chairs. "And was quite possibly the best coffee date…of my entire life." He let that register and noticed the slight way her mouth fell open. "But…why are you so willing to take all those risks in your professional life, but none when it comes to matters of the heart?"

She was once again rendered speechless, by this man that completely confounded her.

"You are the one person that I…" He stopped what he had been about to say. He looked down the street towards the stage coach that had just rumbled past. Somehow, he hadn't even heard the rumble, or the passing, he just realized it was parked there now. He met her gaze again. "Why do we always end up like oil and water, you and me?"

Fiona just stared at him, trying to find a way to answer. "I'm sorry. You just caught me off guard."

"But why must you be on guard with me?" He gazed at her. "I am just a man." He motioned toward the stage coach. "And it was only a little walk." He looked sad now. "I'm sorry if I asked too much." He walked down the stairs and stepped down onto the street.

Fiona was still trying to recover, still trying to sort out what to do, what to say. But she absolutely couldn't let him leave like this. She had been thinking of him all week. He consumed so many of her thoughts all day long, so why was she having such a hard time expressing herself now? And why had she been so stubborn about walking him to the coach?

"Jake, wait." He turned, now he stood in the middle of the street. She took two steps forward just to the edge of the steps. It wasn't close enough. So she ran down and stood just in front of him.

She looked up at him, so tall and handsome towering above her. "Stop apologizing." Her voice firm now. "I am the one who should apologize." She paused and blinked a few times. She moved her mouth in a way that her dimples showed, and then she tried. "I'm sorry. I don't want us to be like oil and water. Ever."

Jake wanted to reach out and tuck away that thin curl of hair that had been blown by the breeze, into the gloss that shimmered on her perfect lips. But he stood stark still, for fear that any movement, any movement at all, would rend him powerless to stop himself, from reaching out and doing just that.

He finally exhaled the breath he'd been holding. "I know my heart, Fiona. Do you know yours?"

"It's not that simple." She was an independent woman and didn't want to get lost inside someone else, the way another had threatened to consume her. Though, when she looked up into Jake's eyes, she didn't see one hint of threat. Not one. Maybe Jake was different from the last man who had tried to control her.

On the contrary, Jake's smile was sweet and accepting, in a way that undid her completely. He wasn't one bit demanding, or selfish, or insisting, or limiting. He seemed to offer something different - something unconditional, something empowering, something limitless.

"It is that simple, if you make simple, Fi." He paused. "Maybe you'll have it figured out when I get back." He gazed at her one more time. Gave her plenty of time to respond, to argue, or to challenge. But she didn't. She didn't say one word.

So he slowly turned and walked toward the stage platform, leaving her in the middle of the street, gazing after him. But before he entered the coach, he looked back at her one more time. He implored her to stop him, to say something, to say anything. But, she didn't. So he took a deep breath and ducked inside.