Chapter 111. Ever Closer

After Julia's house call at George's, she took a long ride on her way back to Hope Valley. And she rode Ginger hard. She just needed to clear her head. Earlier this afternoon, Nathan's fear had been so real and so tangible to her, too. Like Nathan, Julia had lost people that she'd loved dearly, and seeing how quickly those old ghosts came to the surface, brought her own up too. The only difference was that Julia had been blessed by Joseph and Minnie's counsel on how to deal with her fears, and she had somehow managed to stay at peace. But she had felt them, and couldn't fault Nathan at all. Certain subjects were just hard to talk about, no matter how much it needed to be done.

And now, Julia was left with something on the top of her mind: Nathan's work as a Mountie. It could be dangerous sometimes, Julia wasn't naive to this fact. Even if his new position did mean less risk, from day to day, Nathan was still Nathan. He was selfless and noble, the kind of man who would put his life on the line to help others, if need be. And that meant there was still risk. She couldn't deny that simple truth.

And so…she rode.

Julia let the regular rhythm of Ginger's strong steady canter calm her. She let the wind, rushing past in every direction, take each of her worries away. She emptied her mind. She realized how easy it was, from the back of a racing horse, to let it all go. And so, she did.

And somewhere along the way, it clicked - Julia quickly understood why Nathan and Jake both took to the mountains, on the back of a horse, to escape, and to think.

When she was all emptied out, one thing was certain - Julia would not trade one single day with Nathan Grant. Not for anything in the world - not for security, or assurance, or safety, or any other thing. Not one single day. That truth, she knew to the core of her being.

When Julia finally arrived back at the the livery, her hair was wind-blown and her cheeks hot, but she felt better. She felt like herself. She dismounted and quietly led Ginger inside.

And there, waiting in Ginger's stall, was Nathan. When her eyes met his, she knew. He was there to make things right. Julia tied Ginger's reigns to the post and turned to face him.

"Nathan." It came out as breathless as she felt.

He looked her over and liked what he saw. Julia had the look of someone who had ridden a horse well and enjoyed the exhilaration. And that rosiness on her cheeks was so beautiful. He smiled to himself and rasped, "Hi."

She stood frozen, but he stepped closer and took her hand. She answered back. "Hi."

"Jules. I couldn't wait any longer to tell you. I'm sorry. I didn't mean to…distance myself from you." He gave her a shy smile. "I was caught off guard, though it's no excuse. No matter what happens, I never want to be far from you."

Julia grinned even. "And I never want to be far from you either." She had a promise she wanted to make. And she looked into the depths of those blue eyes, to make it. "I promise you, Nathan. I'm not going anywhere...not if I can help it." She paused and swallowed. "I told you before. I will always fight for you. And for Allie. And for our family." She placed her other hand gently on his jawline. "Always."

Nathan took a deep breath and exhaled long. He spoke low. "I will always fight for you too, Julia Matthews. And for our love. No matter what." He smiled crooked at the sparkle that brought to her eyes. "You are my rib."

And he did that charming, slow pull on her hand that brought her ever closer. And he wrapped her in his arms. He held her so close and so tight. He breathed in her scent until it filled his lungs. And when Julia laid her cheek against his chest, he rested his own cheek on her hair. She fit so perfectly…into his arms, into his heart, into his life.

They stayed like that for a long time, all melded together. And then finally, Nathan reluctantly pulled back, though just enough to gaze down at her. "I love you, Julia Matthews."

She smiled up into his sky-blue eyes, that were now also sparkling. "I love you, Lawman."

And Nathan finally let her go, just enough to bring Ginger the rest of the way in. He worked alongside her, removing Ginger's tack and getting her put up for the night.

Then he took Julia's hand in his, intertwined their fingers, and walked her home.

At her back door, Nathan pulled her into his arms again. He just wanted to feel her close once more. And, well she didn't mind. Julia relished being close and feeling his racing heart sync rhythm with her own.

He pulled back a little, tipped her chin up, and kissed her tenderly. The emotions were raw and deep, and sweet.

Finally, Nathan ended the kiss and smiled at her. "Thirteen days." She could sense the anticipation.

She smiled back, feeling it too. "It will be the most wonderful day of my entire life."

"Mine, too." He agreed. He stepped back a little more, preparing to leave.

"Will you please give Allie a hug from me, when you walk her to school in the morning?" Julia asked.

"Of course, I will." He was touched that she had thought of Allie. "I'm taking her to breakfast at the cafe in the morning. It's kind of our father-daughter tradition, on the first day of school." Nathan told her.

Julia thought it was sweet. "Yes, she told me. And, she asked me to pick her up. If it's okay with you?"

"Of course, it is." Nathan replied. "She mentioned it already."

"So maybe I'll see you somewhere in between?" Julia wondered, hoped.

Nathan leaned close and kissed her on the cheek. "I, Nurse Matthews, will make it a point to run into you." And he turned to go. He glanced back at her one more time before walking home.

On Monday, a little before noon, Julia walked down to the mercantile to pick up a package for the infirmary. On her way back down the boardwalk, she heard a cute but quiet little whistle behind her.

Julia put one hand on her hip and turned around. She knew it had to be him. "Inspector, is that how you greet all the women in this town?"

Nathan laughed from his belly. "No, ma'am. Just you." He pulled Newton close to the boardwalk and gave her his charming smile, the one that melted all her insides.

"Well I must say, it has been a little while since I've been cattle-called." She smiled flirtatious dimples back at him, and leaned a little over the railing of the boardwalk.

He gazed at her. "Well you look so beautiful today. I couldn't help myself." The color of her nurse's apron turned her eyes the most incredible deep shade of ocean blue.

Newton turned his head slightly, as if to look at her too, and he pawed the ground. Nathan noticed and chuckled. "You see? Even Newton thinks so."

Julia looked down at Newton who did seem to respond to her voice. She walked down the stairs and spoke to him. "Hi, Newt." She tucked the package under her arm and petted him just the way he liked. He pawed the ground some more, showing his contentment. "I've missed you, boy."

Nathan dismounted. "My horse has good taste."

Julia giggled as she kept on petting. "He does seem to be very discerning of character." She looked at Nathan sideways. "He picked you for a partner, didn't he?"

Nathan smiled big. "Yes, I guess he did."

She stopped petting, turned slightly and asked. "Allie got off to her first day of school alright?"

Nathan nodded. "She sure did. We had a nice breakfast together, and then before I knew it, it was time." He smiled. "She wore that lavender dress."

"Oh, I was hoping she would. It's so lovely on her." Julia answered, happy to hear that Allie had worn one of her new dresses.

"And, she asked me for some new complicated hairstyle." Nathan admitted. "I hope it held up."

Julia chuckled low. "I'm sure you did just fine, Nathan."

He looked at Julia and squinted one eye. "Maybe once you are living with us, you could help with her hair, sometimes? She's starting to ask for styles that are a little bit out of my league."

Julia smiled. "I would love to, Nathan, but I don't know how much help I'll be. I'm not sure I know anymore about hairstyles than you do. I grew up just like Allie, remember? With hair styled by a single father?" He had forgotten that part. She hadn't had a mother around to teach her the fancy styles.

But for Allie, she would do anything, even learn how to style the latest trends. "Although, I did have Fiona show me some updated hair-dos for Allie's sleep over. Maybe I can ask her to show me a few more things."

Nathan encouraged. "I'm sure whatever you are willing to try, Allie would love."

"And I would love to try." Julia said with a smile. "Are there any new kids at the school this year?"

"Actually, yes. There were a few new faces. I didn't meet any of them yet. But I'm sure Allie will tell you all about them when you pick her up." Nathan surmised.

"I can't wait to hear how her day went." Julia replied. "She was worried Mrs. Thornton would give her math homework already."

"She might." Nathan paused. "It wouldn't surprise me."

Julia couldn't believe it. "On the first day?"

Nathan shrugged. "Accelerated math." Then he asked. "Jules, when you bring Allie home, do you think you could stay a little while? And we could finish our own homework, for Joseph?"

Julia liked that idea. "Sounds fine. We can get it done early instead of waiting till the last minute."

"Exactly." Nathan replied.

"Okay. It's a date." She flashed him her dimples again. "Well, Lawman. I better get back to work. I'll see you later, then."

Nathan took one tiny step closer, though he just gazed at her. And those eyes communicated all that she needed to know. "Until later, Jules."

"Have a good afternoon, my love."

And he mounted in one handsome movement. Julia stepped back up onto the boardwalk and waved at him once more, as he rode off toward the livery.

When the bell rang, Julia was waiting out front. Elizabeth opened the schoolhouse doors, and happy children spilled out and down the stairs, to meet their parents, waiting on the lawn. Julia stood with Florence and Cat, and once Allie spotted her, she made a bee-line.

Allie looked so pretty and grown up in her new lavender dress. Julia wondered how Nathan had done this morning over breakfast. Had he thought the same, taken notice of how mature she looked? And if so, how had he handled it?

Julia remembered something, and inspected Allie's hair. It looked pretty darn good. "You hair looks lovely, Allie."

"My dad did it. Can you believe it?" It was pretty impressive. Oh, that Nathan.

Julia smiled to herself and replied. "He did a great job. Don't you think, ladies?" Allie turned from side to side, to show the others.

Florence agreed. "Your Dad did that, Allie?" Emily came out a few minutes behind Allie, and headed toward them.

Allie smiled crooked. "Yep. He's learned a lot about girl's hair over the years."

Cat Montgomery piped in. "That's pretty impressive. Emily's Dad would never have been able to pull off something like that."

Florence chuckled in her usual jovial way. "I don't know many men who would be able to do that."

Allie smiled shy. "It did take him a few tries."

Florence gave her Florence nod. "Well, it looks very nice, Allie."

"Thank you, Mrs. Yost." Allie replied.

Paul walked up and greeted his mother and the other ladies.

Julia bid farewell, as they all readied to leave. "It was nice chatting with you ladies. Have a great day."

Florence smiled. "Good bye, you two." And Emily gave a little wave.

Julia put her arm around Allie, as they started home. "How was your first day?"

"Very good. We rearranged seats, so now I'm next to Emily." Allie explained. "And, Mrs. Thornton did bring a whole set of encyclopedias with her. And we can look at them any time there is a break. There is so much information in them…they are very interesting."

Julia smiled. "That's wonderful, Allie. And, what about your math?"

With a happy smile, Allie reported. "No homework yet." Then she got a curious look on her face. "Which is not like Mrs. Thornton." She seemed to be figuring out just how to say something, and got the very same look that Nathan made when he was doing the same, putting words together. "It's funny. She seems different, like I mentioned before. She's still focused…but softer, somehow." Allie shrugged. "Emily said she used to be like that, in the beginning, when she first came to Hope Valley."

Julia was happy to hear that. "And how was it seeing all your friends?"

"Great. Like I said, I sit next to Emily, and Opal's just behind me, next to Anna." She reported. "And there are some new kids."

Julia asked. "Any your age?"

Allie answered. "Yes. There are two. And they're twins - Teddy and Teresa. Teresa, she sits on the other side of me. And Teddy is with Paul." She paused. "And there are two more besides - one girl Opal's age, her name is Eliza. And she has a brother, David, who is younger."

Julia smiled. "Sounds like the classroom is filling up."

"Well, between the saw mill and the oil business, there are a few new families, I guess." Allie shrugged.

They arrived at the house, Allie and Julia went right up the steps, and inside. Nathan heard them come in and came down a minute later, dressed in casual clothes.

"How was your day, Allie girl?" He asked, as she slid her few books onto the dining room table.

She smiled. "Good. There are a few new kids, as you saw this morning." Allie, always with her positive disposition. "I think it will be a great school year."

Nathan was happy that Allie was happy. He glanced down at her books. "Homework already?"

"No, actually. Which is a first." Allie replied. "But, you know me, I wasn't gonna beg for it."

Nathan chuckled. "No, I guess you wouldn't."

Nathan walked over to the living room and picked up his journal. He smiled over at Julia and asked, "Speaking of homework. Are you still up for doing ours?"

Allie looked back and forth between them, confused, but curious. "Homework. You guys have homework?"

Julia giggled low. "Yes, Allie. Homework. Sometimes you get assigned homework, even when you are an adult."

Allie looked even more curious. Nathan filled her in. "Joseph and Minnie gave us homework, as part of our marriage preparations."

Allie eyes went playful. "You mean to tell me homework doesn't end when I graduate?"

Nathan chuckled low. "No by a long shot, Allie girl."

Allie looked up to the ceiling and let out a cute little, "Ugh!"

Julia smiled at her. "Don't worry, Allie. It gets easier and more interesting, as you get older." Julia put up one finger. "And, you are never too old to learn something new."

"I guess not." Allie smiled at them.

Nathan told her. "We're gonna go out back, to your chairs, Allie. In case you need us."

"Okay. Have fun." Allie replied, and she headed up to her room.

When Nathan and Julia got outside to the chairs, Nathan opened his journal, and turned to the questions they were supposed to answer last week. The first one was already done.

The second question, how to make a unified decision for a purchase, was answered fairly quickly. Nathan and Julia both had a similar way of living and similar spending habits. As well, their outlook on what things were important in life, or not, matched very well. So that question was quickly and easily covered. Nathan wrote down the conclusion in his notebook.

The last question asked them to disclose their financial situation, including bank accounts, to each other. Julia was interested to see if her suspicions about Nathan were correct. For a while now, she had been pretty sure that money was not an issue for him. He was not someone who spent extravagantly, or flaunted what he did have. But he was someone who was smart with his resources, and had most likely invested or saved any funds he didn't need day to day.

"How should we do this, Nathan?" Julia asked.

Nathan offered. "I can go first, I guess." He laid the book down and seemed slightly uncomfortable. But, he went on. "As you know, I own about half of the ranch." He looked over at her. "But, my living from the Mounties has always been enough for Allie and I. So each quarter, when my profits from the ranch came in, my mother either reinvested them into the ranch, or put them in an account for me." He rubbed his hands together as he explained. "Nearly all of the reinvestments came back with a good return, and those profits also went into the bank account. And then, the funds in that account were often invested by my banker, which also proved profitable. So…the account...grew."

He paused, saw that she was following, then continued. "And well, since Allie and I had all we needed from my Mountie salary, I never really touched the account. It's been growing for a long time…with my mother adding in my profits, all the while." He looked down at the book, and back up at her. She didn't look surprised. "Basically, the account was for the future, so I never used anything in there. Until I bought Bill's land. And I've also made three big payments toward our dream house."

Julia nodded. He was a clever man, and had probably grown whatever he had been given like the talents in the Bible. But he shouldn't pay their big house by himself. She should contribute, too. "How many payments are left, for the big house?"

Nathan smiled at her. "We are supposed to talk about what we do have, Julia. Not what we need to pay."

"But Nathan, you cannot expect me to let you pay all of the big house by yourself. Our marriage is a partnership, and I should contribute, too." She told him simply.

"Jules, when we are married, it will all be shared anyway. Remember?" On that point, Nathan was correct. Legally, it wouldn't really matter from which account it came, after they were married. Everything would be shared. But still, she wanted him to know that all she had was his, too.

"Okay. But my father left me a small nest egg. It's yours if we need it. To make more payments for the big house." Julia simply told him. "That house is OUR dream and what's mine is yours, to see it realized."

Nathan took her hand. He appreciated that. "I don't think we'll need it, Julia." He wrote down a number. A big number. An impressive number. "This is what is left in my account, after I bought Bill's land, and made the three payments. Mom just made another deposit, so there should be more than enough in there to finish paying for the house. And for us to furnish it, build the barn, and buy you a horse." He paused. "Plus, I have a few more investments coming in at the end of the year."

"Wow, Nathan. You are a smart investor." Julia smiled at him. She had suspected as much.

"You should keep your nest egg for anything related to the house in Peggy's Cove. Just in case." Nathan told her.

"I think you and Jake think alike, because my nest egg is invested as well. Jake takes care of it. Actually, he kept everything Dad left us together, in one account, and he manages it. He's smart like you, with investments. He talks to me from time to time about certain opportunities he's considering, but I never really make any decisions about what he does with it. I trust him completely. He's clever. And has grown it over these four years." She wanted him to know. "But Nathan, if we were to need any of the funds, Jake would sell my half and give me my share. At any time."

"Do you have any idea the worth of your half?" Nathan asked.

"I can ask Jake, to be sure. But, I would estimate it's about a third of your number, there." Julia told him. Wow. Okay.

Nathan wrote it down in her column.

"But Nathan. Really. If you need any of it, for the house, the barn, whatever, I will get it for you. Or if you would like to add it to your investments, we can merge it with your account." Julia motioned with her hand as she told him.

Nathan smiled at her. "I'll take that into consideration. But, I think you should leave it where it is, for now. Even if we eventually merge it all together, it would be nice to leave some with your brother, for upkeep on the house you two share."

"I also have a little bit saved from my salary, these last few years. If you need it, for furniture or beds or anything else, for the big house." Julia told him.

"That's a separate account from the one with Jake?" He asked.

"Yes." She pulled out the ledger for her regular account, and opened it for him.

He kept a similar account, with his Mountie salary, that he used for regular living expenses. He pulled his ledger out too, and showed her. There were similar amounts. "These two we should merge together."

Julia smiled. She'd had the same thought. "Agreed."

Nathan wrote down her account number in his ledger. "I'll get to work on that right away. This will be our normal everyday account."

"Okay, Lawman." She smiled. "And when it comes time, you can use anything in there for cabinets, or furniture, or anything you need for the house."

Nathan smiled at her. "Well, after the last payment on the house, there should still be enough left in my account to cover all that, Jules. Provided you don't go too crazy, picking out furniture and curtains, and anything else you'd like."

Julia giggled. "Nathan, I would much rather fill our house with furniture made by your hands and mine, than anything from a fancy furniture store." She smiled at him. "And, I would love to work alongside you, be your…helper, to make anything you have vision for."

Nathan closed his book. He loved that. He lifted her hand gently to his lips and kissed the back of her knuckles. She exhaled as the butterflies took flight. Would that ever stop happening? She sincerely hoped not.

The vision of Julia, messy bun high on her head, working and sanding next to him, filled Nathan's mind. And the vision of what they could build together, filled his heart. His father would help him too, with shelves, and cabinets, and doors. But, there were things he would love to build with Julia. Ideas were overflowing now. How he longed for his sketchbook to draw it all on paper.

"What's next?" Julia asked.

Nathan brought his mind back to the task at hand, and looked at her column. "The house in Peggy's Cove."

"Okay." Julia looked down at his book. "Nathan, it seems that you have already discerned that Jake and I would both like to keep the house in Peggy's Cove, for the time being. I hope that is okay with you?" She looked at him. He didn't answer, so she went on. "Neither of us are ready to part with it yet, and we thought it could be used for vacations, or a summer home. Jake might even like to go back there one day. So, I would like to oblige him, and keep it for now, if you agree to do so."

Nathan smiled at her. "You and Jake should absolutely keep the house. I am very much looking forward to going there, and discovering it with you. And I think it's a wonderful idea to keep it for holidays or vacations." He looked down at her page. "Do you have any idea the value?"

Julia nodded. "Jake had it estimated when Dad passed away. So, this number might be four years old. I have no idea how fast these things change." She wrote down the number in her column, next to where he had written: Big House in Peggy's Cove.

When he saw the number, he was surprised. It must, indeed, be a big house. "But, I own only half of that." So, Nathan wrote added a little citation that her part was half. Even so, half was still...considerable.

He asked her quietly. "Anything else?"

"Nothing I can think of, Nathan."

He hoped this wouldn't throw her for a loop. "Julia, there are a few more things. Just things I want you to know about." Nathan took a deep breath. "If anything should happen to me, after we are married, my Mountie pension will come to you." Julia looked at him, but just blinked. Now it was her turn to be caught off guard. He noticed the slight change in her countenance, so he took her hand again. "Though, since I am her guardian, I would really like a portion of my pension to go to Allie. If you would oblige me."

Julia, of course, immediately nodded her agreement. She whispered. "Of course."

Nathan turned the page and wrote Allie's name. There he wrote down the details. He wanted Allie to have 25%. "There is also a bank account for her, from the profits of the ranch. Mom keeps up with it. It's sort of Colleen's share, though a lower percentage." He wrote the words: bank account on Allie's list. "Mom has all the details of that account."

Nathan asked quietly. "If ever I'm…gone. Would you help Mom see to it, that Allie gets those two things?"

Julia swallowed hard, and nodded again. She rasped. "Of course."

He was glad to have that over with. "If you are sure about all of this, then I will see to everything with Bill, this week. I will ask him to note all of our wishes, legally."

Julia's voice didn't want to work right, but she forced it out anyway. "I wholeheartedly agree."

Nathan looked at her. She was suddenly pensive and quiet. He closed the book. "That seems…like everything." He smiled, hoping to lighten the mood. "Homework over."

When she didn't answer, Nathan stood and pulled her up with him. He held her hand in his. "We are going to have a beautiful, long life together, you and I."

Julia knew it was true. Nathan had planned for the future, even before he knew she would be a part of it. And, it was beautiful. He had hoped for a wife and a family, and she was the one he had chosen. She would be the one to bring those hopes into reality. She was the blessed one who would get to marry him. She felt so fortunate.

She too, had hoped for a husband and a family. She just never dreamed anyone could be as perfect for her as Nathan Grant. And Allie, oh, Allie. She was the daughter Julia never knew she wanted. Half her age, but somehow, it felt as if Allie was always meant to be hers.

Nathan slowly pulled her toward him, but she went quickly, into his arms. Julia buried her face in his neckline and held him tight. She breathed him in, his all-consuming scent, of fresh mountain air and pine, that was inherently him. She let it fill her lungs until it was all she knew.

He was her safe place. Her home.

And she let his words be her comfort. They would have a long life together. And, it would be beautiful. She was more than sure of it.