Chapter 133. Meant to Love You
On Saturday morning, Julia found it hard to wake up, in that big soft hotel bed. Sunlight was streaming in the huge window, and she was sure the view must be fantastic, but it was just so hard to open her eyes. She wanted to cuddle into Nathan and stay just a little longer. She put her hand out in front of her, in search of him, but it was met by his hand. In fact, she felt Nathan tenderly thread their fingers together, so she opened her eyes. And there he was, facing her from his pillow, his eyes already on her. Had he been watching her sleep?
She blinked a few more times and met his gaze. "Good morning." She rasped.
"Hi…wife." He whispered across the small distance between them. She loved that hi, and now he'd added wife.
Nathan reached over with his free hand and gently tucked a loose strand of hair behind her ear. "Did you sleep well?"
She smiled. "Are you kidding? In this bed built for a king?" She snuggled into the soft pillow.
"I'm glad you like it." He told her.
"Of course, I would have been fine in that big bed at the ranch, or even our bed at home." She told him. "As long as I get to wake up next to you."
He smiled at her, and let his hand come and gently caress her cheek. "Me, too." He glanced out at the view behind her. She couldn't possibly know how beautiful it was, or how beautiful she was, framed by it. "But I'm glad we came."
Julia hoped any vestige of insecurity, from yesterday, was gone for good. Nathan had opened and shared something painful from his childhood, something he'd assumed he'd already dealt with. But breakthrough had come at a price, one that he'd paid for nearly the rest of the day. Was healing sometimes like that? She wasn't sure, but she didn't want it to be like that, for him. He'd laid bare a broken place, and she admired him for it, and hoped it was now mended, once and for all. He shouldn't ever feel insecure about being honest.
"I am, too." She told him, and she squeezed his hand. "It will be a weekend to remember."
Nathan smiled at her across the distance. "I certainly won't forget."
"Nor will I." She told him softly. "These are days that will live in my memory forever."
He liked that. "Julia…" Nathan swallowed down emotions that were coming up quickly now. "I…never thought…" Somehow she just knew what he was trying to say.
"Me, either." She admitted. She looked down at their hands intertwined together - her small, feminine one, wrapped up in his large, masculine one. A contrast, but one that fit perfectly. She brought her eyes back up to his.
He gazed at her, wanted to tell her what had been on the tip of his tongue for a few days now. She noticed the absolutely serious expression in his eyes. He told her low, "I think I was always meant to love you."
Julia's lips parted and she kept her gaze on him. He asked softly. "You do think that's possible, don't you? That two people from opposite sides of the continent, who didn't even know the other existed, can be…meant for each other?"
Julia smiled at him across the distance. "I do." She answered the very same words she'd said at the altar. "And if ever I need proof, there's you." She paused. "You are all the proof I'll ever need."
Julia had her own revelation to make, so she shared it. "Nathan, when I was walking towards you…down the aisle..." She swallowed. "It felt…it was…" She paused. "like a culmination." She searched for the right words, but there weren't any better than the simplest ones. "I believe that all my life, I have been walking towards you."
Nathan smiled, and understood. His life had been a journey, too, one that had, at times, felt like a mistake or even a failure. But every step, good or bad, had all been part of the journey - and that journey had brought him to her. And now, they would walk the rest of the journey together.
He remembered his own posture at the wedding, as Julia walked the aisle. "And all my life I have been waiting for you."
Julia smiled and pulled his hand up to her lips. She placed several tender kisses across his knuckles and held his hand in both of hers. She looked down at that wedding ring, and let one of her fingers trace across it. And then she brought her eyes back up.
Nathan's eyes were like the blue of the sky, intense and darker now, as he gazed at her. He picked his head from the pillow, with purpose now. And he brought his body right up next to hers, as he kissed her.
All the intensity of the emotions they had just expressed, was in the intensity of that kiss. Sweetness, and tenderness, and deep, honest love. Rightness and confidence was all there, too. And there was an abandon to anything else - all they could think of, or focus on, now, was each other, and the moment.
Nathan began trailing kisses across her cheek and down her neck. He pushed the thin ribbon of her chemise off her shoulder as his hand passed by, and then his lips followed. Julia sucked in breath at his touch, and at the fire that every kiss left behind. She reached up and showed Nathan - pulled the string of the chemise, this one had a tie in front. He pulled it the rest of the way open and began trailing kisses down her chest.
"Nathan." She breathed, and hearing his name like that, all raspy with emotion, made his desire more intense. Julia's hands went into his hair.
She said it again, all raspy and long. "Nathan..."
He came back and leaned down close over her, looked deep into her ocean eyes. Nathan wanted her, there was only one way to express the plenitude of his love now. But he said it with words first. "I love you." He rasped softly. "I love you so much."
Julia searched his face and eyes, took it all in, felt every emotion he confessed. And a single sentimental tear escaped and rolled softly into her hair. "I love you, too, very much."
And she wrapped her arms around the back of his neck, and gently pulled his lips to hers.
When Nathan and Julia finally got up for the day, they washed quickly and dressed, because Nathan had scheduled an excursion for today. It was meant to be a surprise, but he had to tell Julia just enough to make sure she was properly dressed, and that they were on time. Once they were ready, Nathan and Julia headed down to the lobby of the hotel, to meet their guide.
Nathan had suggested she wear a lightweight shirtwaist, and pants and boots. And he'd insisted on the cowboy hat, so Julia braided her hair, and obliged him.
When they got down to the lobby, a young man, dressed in similar excursion-wear, met them. "Inspector Grant?" He asked kindly.
Nathan answered with an easy smile. "Yes sir, that's us. The Grants." He liked saying that.
The young man smiled and extended his hand, with youthful exuberance. "I'm Teddy LaRue, and I'll be leading your excursion today, with my colleague, Neil Blackstone."
Nathan shook both their hands, as did Julia, while Nathan introduced them. "I'm Nathan Grant, and this is my wife, Julia."
The older Mr. Blackstone didn't look quite as thrilled to be there, but in all honesty, it would be hard to match young Teddy's excitement.
The young man winced one side of his face and asked Nathan gently. "Sir, would it be okay with you both, if another couple joined us? I've got one guy out, on account of his wife gave birth last night. I'm sorry to ask, I know you asked for a private tour, but they're honeymooners, too."
Nathan looked around to see if he could spot the couple, but they didn't seem to be present yet. Then, he glanced down at Julia, who nodded her agreement, even though she still had no idea what the excursion might be. She told him softly. "They're on their honeymoon, too. It would be a shame if their excursion got cancelled."
Nathan returned his gaze to the young man. "That'd be fine with us, Mr. LaRue."
"Great." He chortled and nodded at his colleague, relieved.
And then, the other couple walked up. "We're here!" The very young woman said, a little too loud. "We made it!" She repeated, even louder than the first time.
Nathan and Julia turned to greet the young couple, who would be joining their excursion. The wife boldly introduced the both of them. "Hi-i. We're the Collins's." She told both the guides, and Julia. "This here's Wyatt and I'm Susanna." She put her hand out for Julia first, who shook. "Though most people call me Susie." Nathan shook Wyatt's hand, though the younger man didn't say a word.
Susie had bright red hair, curled in tight cues, and tucked high on her head. But, she didn't look a day over seventeen. "We're from the Dakota's, just here in Canada, on honeymoon."
Julia spoke up. "It's nice to meet you. I'm Julia, and this is my husband Nathan." Susie looked up at Nathan, finally noticed him standing behind Julia. And when she did, Susie grinned big, she wasn't one bit subtle in the way she looked him over.
"Well, it's nice to meet ya'll too." Susie smiled, which made Nathan shift his weight uncomfortably. "Where you all from?"
Julia just took it in stride and answered. "West of here, a little town called Hope Valley."
"Sounds nice." Susie drawled, as she finally brought her gaze back to Julia. Susie looked her over now, too.
Teddy spoke up. "Well folks, shall we go?" He asked, picking up a bag and hoisting it onto his shoulder.
"Lead the way, Teddy." Susie told him loudly, and they were off.
Teddy took the lead spot, followed by Susie and Wyatt, then Julia and Nathan, and Mr. Blackstone walked last. And they set out on a nature hike - at least, that's all the guides would tell them, so far.
They hiked up into the mountains, it was a beautiful walk, easy and laid-back, on a trail that was well maintained.
At noon, they arrived at a beautiful overlook, with an amazing view of the Rockies. The guides announced that this would be a stopping point, for rest and a picnic, and the couples were free to look around.
Julia looked up at her husband and smiled. "This is some excursion, Nathan." She told him, happily.
Then she headed toward the overlook. In fact, she walked right up to the edge. Too close to the edge for Nathan, who, in a moment of reflex, grabbed tightly ahold of her arm. He gasped and pulled her back. Julia looked up at him, startled.
"It's okay, Nathan." She told him with an edge of irritation in her voice. "I'm okay."
Nathan took a deep breath. His heart was beating wildly now, he had thought she was going over. "It's not okay, Julia. You were too close." He told her, still trying to get his bearings.
Julia laughed. "I was perfectly fine, Nathan." Was she laughing at him? At his reaction?
But Nathan didn't laugh, and he didn't think it was funny. But if she wanted to brush it off, he would try to do the same. "Don't laugh." He told her, "Not at me." And he let go of her arm and walked away.
Julia raised her hand to where his had been. He'd grabbed her tightly, but hadn't hurt her.
She watched his shoulders slump as he walked away, to another viewpoint, farther down. Julia turned around right where she was and looked out at the scenery. She tried to enjoy the view, but couldn't now. It was impossible without Nathan.
And now, he was quite possibly upset with her. How had she managed to upset him? Just because she'd walked too close to the edge? She was a grown woman and knew her body, knew she was not going to fall over. The interaction replayed in her mind as she stood alone and tried to calm herself.
Soon, she heard Teddy call them for the picnic. Julia walked towards his voice, and discovered the nice place they'd set for the picnic. Nathan came from the other direction, though he didn't make eye contact.
Susie and Wyatt came out from another viewpoint, and he had her lipstick smeared all over his face. This made it obvious to everyone what they'd been doing, and Julia just shifted her weight.
"It's such a pretty day. Don't you think it's a pretty day, Wyatt?" Susie said, obviously trying to act natural. She finally looked up at him and noticed her lipstick. And she looked terribly embarrassed as she whispered something to her husband. He took out a handkerchief and wiped his mouth, though he grinned happily as he did it, he didn't seem to mind that everyone knew what they'd been up to.
Teddy handed each couple a blanket and a canteen, then invited each individual to fill a plate with picnic fare. He suggested they to find a romantic place, to eat together. Teddy looked at his pocket watch and asked everyone to meet back in half an hour.
Susie bounced off with Wyatt in tow, and returned to the view point where they'd just been. Julia eyed Nathan, who was still not making eye contact, and waited. He finally walked past her towards the second viewpoint, the one where he'd been by himself. And she quietly followed.
At this viewpoint, there was a long, level, very safe rock to sit on, far from the edge. Nathan spread their blanket out there, without even asking, and sat down with his plate. Julia didn't have much of a choice, so she sat next to him. He didn't say a word but ate in silence, so she did, too. She didn't really think she'd done anything wrong, so wasn't going to admit anything of the kind.
When Julia finally looked out at the view, she realized what she'd missed, in her hard-headedness. The view was spectacular. The Rockies were impressive, massive even, and had a beautiful dusting of snow across the top. They were tall and regal and breathtaking. That beautiful green came up just so far and stopped, then the mountainsides were rocky and jagged, up to another elevation. And the tops were bright white, as they climbed high and just barely touched the clouds.
Julia wished they had a picture camera, to keep this one forever. It was incredible. She tried to commit it all to memory, for herself, but also, for her sketchbook and perhaps eventually, even a paint canvas. How she would love to paint this scene, she doubted though, she could do it justice.
She finally glanced at Nathan and realized he wasn't eating anymore. She tried to take another bite, but couldn't eat anymore either. So she set the plate to the side, pulled her legs up in front of her, and wrapped her arms around them. And she just stared out at the view, and enjoyed it, as much as possible.
When their time was up, Nathan stood between her and the edge, and picked up her plate. "You didn't eat much." He said softly.
She just replied. "I'm not very hungry."
He looked her in the eye, finally, and handed her the canteen. "You should drink, at least. At this elevation…"
She took the canteen from him and did as he suggested. She drank. Then, she picked up the blanket, folded it, and followed him back to the group.
When they got there, only Teddy was back at the meeting point. He took their plates from Nathan, disposed of the leftovers, and packed it all up. Mr. Blackstone arrived shortly after.
But they waited almost ten more minutes before the other newlyweds arrived, and they came out of the woods all bubbly and happy. Susie's hair was quite a mess, and Wyatt's shirt was buttoned all wrong. They had definitely enjoyed their picnic.
Julia glanced at Nathan, who had also noticed their disheveled state. She fought back a giggle and made herself look to the side. Nathan was also fighting a smile as he fixed his gaze on Teddy.
Mr. Blackstone told them, "We should get going." And so, Teddy packed up the last of the items from the Collins. As he did, Nathan seemed to soften, and finally met Julia's gaze. She smiled and he managed a small smile back. Maybe they were being silly.
They got back on the trail, and it was Mr. Blackstone who led the way now. Nathan followed him, then Julia, and then the Collins, then Teddy. As they climbed a little more, Julia couldn't help but watch Nathan now. He was wearing that cowboy hat again, and the way he gazed out from under it, at any sound in the woods, made her soften even more. He seemed ready to protect her at all costs, whenever there was the slightest noise in their direction.
The terrain was easy, and the hike enjoyable. And after what was not even an hour, they finally arrived at the destination: Glenbow Falls. A beautiful rustic waterfall, that rushed out of the mountainside and made an incredible scene. It was fantastic. The power, and the beauty, all culminated in a magnificent pool at the bottom.
Julia's lips parted and she glanced at Nathan. "It's so beautiful." She told him as she brought her gaze back to the falls, and took it all in. Rocky outcroppings surrounded the clear blue pool at the bottom, and rose all the way up the falls. Then trees and flowers, in a myriad of colors, including a deep green, framed it all.
Teddy reached into his pack and pulled out a picture camera. "Folks, I'd love to take your photograph in front of the falls, if you'd like." He told both couples.
Of course, Susie giggled loud and said, "Yes, me and Wyatt would love that!" She grabbed his hand and pulled him out on a rock next to the falls. Susie planted a big kiss right on Wyatt's mouth, as Teddy took their picture.
As soon as he was done, Teddy turned toward Nathan and Julia, who finally managed to stand a little bit closer to each other now. "Okay, Mr. and Mrs. Collins. How bout leaving the place to the Grants now?" He looked back over his shoulder to see if the kiss was over. It was, and Susie and Wyatt relented their place.
But that meant it was Nathan and Julia's turn. "Can we get your picture, too, Inspector, Mrs. Grant?" Teddy asked shyly. Julia reached up and removed her hat.
Nathan looked at Julia, removed his hat too, and took her hand. He led her out over the slick rocks, right up close to the mist of the falls. In fact, the mist was rising around them, as he took a step closer, and looked down at her. He wanted to apologize, and say he was sorry. And most of all, he wanted to kiss her, and make it all go away.
But Teddy interrupted them. "Could you look this way, please?" He asked.
Nathan held Julia around the back and pulled her closer, facing him. She wanted to talk it out, tell him she was sorry, and make it right; but now everyone was looking at them. So, she looked towards the camera.
"Okay, folks, I got it." Young Teddy told them.
Nathan took a step back and looked down at his wife, while she gazed up at him. His eyes communicated so much, and so did hers.
Mr. Blackstone called out. "We can climb up to the top if any of you's like to go. It's a nice walk, not too hard."
"Shall we?" Nathan asked softly. "I've always heard about this waterfall, always wanted to come."
"Then, we should." She replied and followed him over to Mr. Blackstone.
"How bout you's, Mr. and Mrs. Collins?" Blackstone asked them.
Susie had already taken her shoes off, and was nursing a blister. Wyatt straightened, from helping her, and told them. "Naw, you's go ahead." Then he bent back down in front of his young bride to inspect her foot. Teddy approached to offer assistance.
"Let's go before they change their minds." Mr. Blackstone told them quietly and with a chuckle. He led them to a trail that started on the right of the falls. They climbed a little while, then zig-zagged up. It was an easy path, and they arrived fairly quickly at the top.
And when they did, wow, were they rewarded. The view from the top was spectacular - the Rockies were tall and splendid in the background. The tall mountains seemed to touch the sky, and the sky seemed to go on forever. And as the trio stood back, they just gazed at the beauty.
Mr. Blackstone stayed back with Nathan, but Julia ventured up to the edge to look down. She wanted to see the water below, and was more careful, this time, or so, she thought.
"Be careful, Missy. It's slick up there!" Mr. Blackstone called out. Nathan straightened sharply and looked from her, to their guide, then back at Julia, concerned now. He hurried to join her.
And when he got there, he realized just how close she was to the edge. He instantly grabbed hold of her again. "Julia! You're too close!" He scolded her.
She didn't think she was close at all. "Nathan, it's okay!" She told him. But he didn't let go. He held onto her until she stepped back a little. "I'm fine." She told him and she shrugged her arm out of his grasp.
"Julia, please step back a little more. Our guide warned you: it's slick." She didn't. He gently took her arm again, and pulled her back two steps. She didn't like that.
"Nathan! You are being ridiculous! I'm fine. I know my own body, and my balance." She told him, with a slightly elevated tone.
Nathan stayed calm and replied. "We are at a high elevation, so no, you don't know your balance, not up here." He looked down at her but began to fume now. His tone raised in volume just a notch. "I'm sorry, but I don't want to lose you!" The truth came out, plain and simple.
"You're not going to lose me." She said, more calm now.
"No, I'm not. Not if I can help it." He planned to protect her at all costs. Always. He pointed at the ground and set her limit. "Not one step closer!" He told her gruffly. She wondered if he ordered Allie around like that? But, she didn't move or defy him. Julia stayed right where she was, as Nathan returned to Mr. Blackstone's side.
Though Julia noticed as he did, that Mr. Neil Blackstone nodded at Nathan, as if he'd done the right thing. He also whispered something, which made Nathan fix his eyes on Julia. He watched her like a hawk. Was he trying to send her the message that he wasn't backing down?
Well now, there was no enjoying the view. And it was Julia who was fuming at present, even if she did relent.
Julia walked away from the edge and started back down the path. She descended back down to the bottom of the falls, all by herself. She didn't wait on any guide, or any man. Then she took off her boots, and waded out into the water. She sat on a rock all alone, and dangled her feet in the cool water. And that's where she was when Nathan and Mr. Blackstone finally came back down from the top.
The descent back to the hotel was quiet. Julia didn't say one word to Nathan. She just put her hat on her head and looked mostly at the ground. When they passed the viewpoint where they'd picnicked, he insisted she drink water again. So she did. Then she went to look at the view alone. She didn't get too close to the edge this time, and realized when she turned around that Nathan had followed her. Was he keeping an eye on her?
When they resumed their descent, Julia walked right behind Teddy, leaving Nathan behind her, to contend with her in his line of sight, instead of the other way around. Now she could enjoy the hike and nature, without him constantly invading her view. They were about halfway down, when suddenly, the leaves under her feet gave way, and she slipped. Julia ended up on her backside, in front of everyone.
Nathan was right there, at her side, within milliseconds. He picked her up, and dusted her off. "Are you okay, Jules?" He asked, concern written on his face. "Where are you hurt?"
Now Julia was even more frustrated than before. "I'm fine, Nathan." She told him a little too emphatically. "I'm fine!" He took a step back, gave her some space, but stuck close. He kept ahold of her under the elbow.
Mr. Blackstone tried to make her feel better, but he didn't really. "See, Missy. It's really easy to slip up here." He told her. "Happens to the best of us."
Julia looked at him and smiled shyly. She told them all, one more time, but completely calm now. "I really am fine. Thank you." And she looked around the group, with a nod.
When they started going again, Teddy led the way, and Nathan followed second, intending to brace her fall if she should slip again. Julia pursed her lips, now she had to look at his sexy shoulders and hat, the rest of the way down. And that on top of her bruised ego.
Susie caught up to Julia, and walked beside her, for a little while. Perhaps it was her attempt to make Julia feel better, when she told her all quiet, just between girls. "You sure are lucky." Susie paused and let her eyes follow Nathan a minute, as he walked. "That's one handsome fella you got there, falling all over himself, to take care of you."
Julia just grinned shy and let her eyes follow Nathan, too. Susie didn't know them at all, but one thing she said was true. Nathan was just trying to take care of her, to protect her. Julia didn't have to guess at his motives, she knew them already, because she knew him. And she could understand his over-reaction up near the waterfall - for every time he left out on a mission, it felt to her as if he was the one walking close to danger. And the fear of losing someone? Julia certainly understood that one too.
She hated to admit it, but perhaps he had been right about the danger up here. She had indeed slipped, even on level ground, after all.
Susie glanced back at her husband. "I have to tell Wyatt any time I need anything. Even for a blister."
Julia looked over her shoulder at young Wyatt. He was tall and lanky and kind enough, and he seemed like an okay guy. But it would be hard to compare to Nathan Grant; not many men could make that comparison. Julia let her eyes come forward again, and peruse Nathan's strong back and shoulders. He looked left out from under that cowboy hat, and Julia fought to swallow.
Susie was obviously watching him, too. "How do you keep your hands off'a him long enough to get anything done?" She asked, all brazen and naive.
Julia looked at her young friend, tried to put it in language that she would understand. "Love is more than attraction, Susie." She hoped the younger woman would learn that, for Wyatt's sake. "It also includes a deep respect and adoration of the other person." She gazed again at Nathan's back. "Putting their wants and desires before your own. Counting their needs higher than your needs or whims."
"Why're ya'll in a disagreement, anyway?" Susie asked her.
"Is it that obvious?" Julia asked her young friend.
"Well, yes. I could cut the romantic tension between the two'a ya with a knife." Susie told her with a giggle.
Julia looked at her and squinted one eye. "Do you even know what that means, Susie? Romantic tension?"
"Not really. I read that phrase in Harper's Bazaar once, and always wanted to use it." She said with a giggle. "But, I can just tell that you two really love each other, but just aren't seeing eye-to-eye right now." She smiled at Julia. "You two remind me of my Mom and Dad. All sweet and lovey-dovey."
Julia glanced again Nathan's way, and he just happened to catch her eye. He grinned over his shoulder. Julia grinned back at him, wishing already that she could talk to him and put things to rights.
"How long ya'll been married?" Susie asked.
"A week." Julia told her. "We're newlyweds, same as you."
"No way! I thought you guys been married a while already." Young Susie told her.
"Why would you think that?" Julia asked, curious.
"There's just a depth in the way he looks at you. Like he's loved you all his life." Susie told her, all wistful, with her hands clasped dreamily in front of her. "Like all his hopes and dreams are wrapped up in you. Do you know what I mean?"
Julia obviously didn't, but she considered Susie's words just the same. Did Nathan really look at her like that?
Susie kept going. "And well, the way you look at him, it's like Christmas mornin'." Susie put up one finger. "But not just any Christmas morning. You remember that one Christmas morning, when you were just sure, you just knew, that that one gift was under the tree? The one you had been waiting and hoping for, all year long?"
Julia's jaw fell open just slightly.
"Ah yes, I can see, you know just what I mean." Susie smiled. "That's the way you look at him."
Julia returned her gaze to Nathan's back, and as she did, she reached up and wiped a tear that had inadvertently escaped. Yes, she probably did look at Nathan like that. Because she had waited all her life for him, and had even told him so this morning. When you put things into perspective like that, this whole disagreement felt silly. Stupid, even. And even more so, considering everything they had both shared, across the pillows, just this morning.
Susie leaned towards Julia and told her quietly. "Wish Wyatt looked at me that way."
Julia smiled shy at young Susie. She didn't know what to say. Julia glanced up and caught Nathan looking back at her again. She held his gaze and smiled sadly. He grinned sad too, looked about as miserable as she felt.
Then Julia looked around her and realized, they had reached the bottom. In fact, they were nearly in front of the hotel again. Teddy led them up the stairs, but stopped in front of the doors.
"Thank you all for joining the Glenbow Manor's Waterfall Tour Excursion." He smiled at the four participants. "Mr. Blackstone and I enjoyed being your guides, and we hope you will make the most of your stay here, at the Glenbow." He nodded at Mr. Blackstone.
Mr. Blackstone looked them all over. He cleared his throat and added. "Happy Honeymoon, to all of ya."
Nathan shook both mens hands and thanked them. Julia did the same, as did her new friend Susie, and good ole' Wyatt. Then the two guides entered the hotel. Susie and Wyatt said good-bye to Julia and Nathan, and walked inside together. So that just left Julia and Nathan, outside on the stairs.
Julia turned toward him and opened her mouth, but before she could say anything, he told her. "I'm gonna…" he took one step back, down a stair. "just take a walk to the stables." And he turned and started walking down the steps.
Julia just watched him a second, calculating her next move. He was introverted like her, and often needed space, so she really didn't want to smother him. But on the other hand, she didn't want to wait any longer to talk this through. "Nathan, wait!" She told him, and she ran down the stairs after him.
Nathan turned and Julia stopped just in front of him, one step up. Eye to eye. "Can we…talk about this? What I did to upset you?"
He was calm but resolute. "What is there to talk about? It was dangerous, and you acted…reckless. Allie and I…we…we depend on you, now." He looked upset all over again.
"But I'm fine, Nathan. Nothing happened." She told him calmly, then she added. "I know my balance, how close I can go."
"No, you don't! We were at a high elevation and lightheadedness is common up there. And, it was slick. The guide told you so, he even had to warn you." Nathan gazed at her. "If something had happened to you…" His voice was all gruff and full of emotion, before it trailed off and he couldn't finish. He blinked twice and then looked away from her.
"But, I'm fine, Nathan." She put her hand on his arm, to show him so.
"Yes, thank God, you are. But, it's not the first time. I thought..." He told her, his voice climbing in volume and shaky now. "You need to be more careful."
"Not the first time?" She asked.
"The overlooks, remember? You go too close to the edge!" Nathan reminded her. "You're not safe."
"What about you, with your grabbing? And your orders?" Julia stepped up to him and challenged.
Nathan's eyes were now ablaze. "I was only trying to protect you!" He bellowed low. How dare she question the lengths he went to protect her. He even risked their harmony, risked upsetting her, and caused this discord between them, just to keep her safe. In fact, he didn't care if she was upset with him even now, as long as she was safe.
Julia looked him over, and remembered how he had lunged for her once, when she was at the overlook with Allie, on their ride to Brookfield. Had she scared him then, too? One look at him, and she could see that she had.
Nathan took a deep breath and looked at the ground. "Maybe I'll just take that walk, now." He tried again to put some space between them. He wanted to regain his calm, and make sure he wasn't being irrational.
But Julia couldn't stand it anymore. No more discord between them, she couldn't take that hurt in his eyes for one more minute. She couldn't stand to see him like this. Who cares how close she could get to an overlook? What did that matter, compared to him? It was time to find back their harmony, whatever it took to get there.
Julia came down the last two steps and stopped him again. She put herself between him and the stables.
Julia looked up at him. "Nathan, I…" Her eyes filled with tears. "I'm sorry. I'm sorry I scared you, and I'm sorry I upset you." It was hard to get it out in a cohesive manner, but she was determined. "Please forgive me, and I promise I'll be more careful from now on." She paused and searched his face. "I never meant to upset you, or cause an argument."
Nathan reached out and took her hand. His touch felt like a lifeline. A tiny restoration of the connection between them. "Julia, of course I forgive you." He rasped and tried to get his out, too. "I'm sorry if I was too harsh. I just…panicked." He told her with sad eyes, she hated seeing the sadness in those eyes. "Please forgive me for over reacting."
"Nathan, you were just protecting me. And I'm not used to having someone protect me." Her mouth turned up the slightest bit, and a tear escaped. "It was insensitive of me, to disregard your feelings."
Nathan took one step closer, reached up and wiped that one tear from her cheek. "Allie and I…need you. I need you." He paused and then started again. He took still another step closer and let his hand rest tenderly on her cheek. "I love you, Julia." He paused and gazed down at her. "All of my plans, for the rest of my life, include you. They depend on you. My plans would amount to nothing, without you…" The emotion was thick in his voice.
Julia gazed up and confessed. "And my future rests with you, Nathan. You and Allie." She told him. "For as much as it's in my power, I'm not going anywhere." Another tear escaped. "There's nowhere else I'd rather be, than with you."
Nathan wiped that tear, too. Then he left his hand on her cheek, as he bent and kissed her. Touching and sweet and tender. A reconnection of two souls who had let themselves fall out of unity with each other. He kissed her long, and when he finally pulled back, he stayed close and looked her in the eye. "You see, my happiness…is now and forever…connected to you."
Julia searched his face and looked into his eyes. She put her hand on his handsome cheek. "Nathan, I need you, too. You are everything to me..." And she brought her lips up and kissed him back. She let her lips convey all of her deep devotion.
And the kiss deepened, and expressed the depth of their love and commitment. Then came the wanting, the desire, the longing, and they suddenly wished they weren't standing in front of this fancy hotel.
Nathan opened his eyes and looked at her, stopped just long enough to implore her. "Will you…come with me?"
She nodded. With eyes dark and longing now, she affirmed that she wanted him, too.
So Nathan took her hand and intertwined their fingers. He turned slowly, and led her up the stairs, and into the hotel. The sound of someone greeting them came to her muffled, as he led her past reception, "Good afternoon." She thought she heard Nathan reply.
But they kept going, up the stairs and down the hall. And Nathan had the key in the lock before she could even glance up at the door.