A/N: averbaldumpingground challenged me on Tumblr to write all 20 prompts from a fake dating list. Fandoms and ships are left to my discretion. I'm doing 500-word ficlets for each.

1. "You don't have to like me, you just need to pretend you do." — Labyrinth, Jareth/Sarah

Rating: G

Genre: Humor

UNFORESEEN CONSEQUENCES

"I can't believe you're making me do this," Sarah hissed under her breath. Well, what little breath she could get while in this abominable corset. She would have loved this fairytale dress—all silvery tulle and silk organza with golden embroidery—as a naïve teen, but after tripping on the layered skirts for the fifth time, she was ready to chuck it into the Bog of Eternal Stench.

"I assure you this isn't my doing, precious," Jareth returned through his fake, toothy grin. "There are certain unforeseen consequences for—"

"—for winning the labyrinth," she finished with a scowl.

He'd appeared at the foot of her bed in the middle of the night, nearly giving her a heart attack. She flung the water bottle she kept on the nightstand at his head, screaming that he had no power over her.

He caught it with a flat expression. "Oh, I'm quite aware," he'd said. "But I'm afraid neither of us have a choice in the matter."

"What matter?" she demanded.

With a grimace, he laid out the sordid tale. The goblins had discovered romance novels during one of their recent trips Above. Thanks to dark fantasy and the inability to parse reality from fiction, they'd decided that The Girl Who Ate the Peach and Forgot Everything was Jareth's soulmate, destined to be Queen of the Underground. They'd whipped themselves up into a frenzy, ready to scour the earth to find her. Something, Jareth assured her, that she would not want to happen.

His plan? A fake relationship to appease the beasts until they moved onto some new shiny interest. She countered with the idea that as king, he could command them to give up this insane idea of making the two of them fall madly in love. Jareth nearly doubled over with laughter as if that was the most ridiculous thing he'd ever heard. Apparently, there was no deterring goblins when they got a notion in their collective brain cell.

Somehow, she found herself agreeing to completely upend her life for this crazy scheme before she could think better of it.

But now, laced into an archaic gown, hand in hand with her adolescent tormentor as they walked through the great hall, Sarah was having second and third thoughts. Dozens of red goblin eyes followed each step they took toward the dais. There were two thrones there. One she remembered from her run over a decade ago. The other was even more make-shift, constructed with an old wicker chair and pieces of a bicycle frame, all wrapped with a fake ivy garland. The ugly thing looked horribly uncomfortable.

"I really don't like you," she whispered.

Jareth hummed in agreement. "I assure you the feeling is quite mutual," he murmured. "But for all of our sakes, you need to be the very vision of besotted. Now smile, precious. They can sense your contempt."

She stretched her mouth in a feral grin. She was absolutely going to make him pay for this.

~FIN~

A/N: Thank you so much for reading! Kind reviews are always welcome!