AN:

Oni: LOOK THE FIRST CHAPTER!

Eridan: Congratulations, you finished it.

Oni: Yep! Hey, Eridan, can you do the disclaimer?

Eridan: Oni does not owwn Homestuck, nor does she owwn Harry Potter. This idea for the story, howwevver, is all hers.

Oni: Onwards!

EDIT

Oni: OH RIGHT AND HERE'S THE LEGEND

"English"

"Alternian"

Oni: YOU MAY CONTINUE!

It was always so fascinating, these aliens. But even Eridan had to admit, while he was a researcher, he was not an archeologist. That was Megido's department, and he didn't want to reveal his little secret just yet. Was it selfish? Of course, but he knew that any troll would probably destroy half the items in his Lab simply because they didn't look practical. Sitting at the desk, which was situated just under some shelves on the left hand side of the Lab, Eridan once again inspected the stone that held his identification symbol, along with some others, wondering what its purpose was. Tapping it did nothing, neither did waving it, and Eridan was NOT going to try those wands again. Frustrated, he glared at the skeletons that were still sitting in their chairs. Because of his limited knowledge of the alien language, he had hit a wall with his research.

But what he did deduce with his research intrigued him to no end. Apparently the arch was built long before transportalizers were invented, so the arch seemed to be the ancient variant of it. Dualscar had traveled to a far-off planet somewhere, and they had established a trading agreement. The arch was built with both ancient Alternian technology and this odd alien magic. Eridan had found that Dualscar's journal hinted at this, but to keep confidentiality, was never explicitly described. This rather irked the young seadweller, because Dualscar never actually described the aliens. All that was ever said about them was that they were "short land-dwelling fleshbags" or the odd "taller annoying land-dwelling fleshbags". What Eridan could gather was that the shorter variety spoke a basterdised version of Alternian, but to Eridan's chagrin none of the alien skeletons he had wrote in this language.

Eridan let out a small sigh. All he needed was a live sample. He needed to somehow procure a living version of these fleshy aliens, but how on Alternia and her two moons is he going to manage that?

"Come on, you can do better than that!"

Yes, Sirius knew he was in a really bad situation at the moment. Yes, he knew that he was being a cocky Gryffindor. Yes, he knew that his cousin, who was glaring at him in anger, was undeniably insane. The question is, did Sirius care.

The answer is a resounding NOPE. However, what Sirius probably didn't realize was that he was standing right in front of the Veil. If he had known this, then he probably wouldn't have been so brave.

Because when Sirius was a young auror, he was given a case of all the men and women who had ever fallen in. Every single one of them walked in with their wand in hand and different objects that could lead them back to the Department of Mysteries. None had ever come out. They tried yelling, summoning, throwing in ropes but to no avail. Nobody ever stepped out and their voices never penetrated the Veil.

The Unspeakables had a different project, however. They had realized long ago that the Veil had strange markings in an unknown runic design that none of them had ever seen the likes of. The closest they got to a match was Gobbledygook, the language of the Goblins, but even then, there wasn't much to go by. Even with all their research, they couldn't figure out what the Veil is or where it leads. All they knew was, once you go in, you never come out. Many have speculated that the Veil is the barrier between life and death. This turned out to be the soundest theory, so it was widely accepted as the truth by most wizards, including Sirius Black and Bellatrix Lestrange.

So it was only when he was hit by a Disarming Spell of all things, because Bellatrix knew all he needed was a little push and he'd be gone forever, did Sirius Black show any sign of horror and surprise. He felt himself fall into the Veil as his cousin cackled in mad glee and Harry screamed his name. He gripped his wand tighter, not ready for Death, he won't go down without a fight.

There it was. The slight change in the air, the shift of energies, only felt by the small feeler hairs that are on a troll's horns. Like insects, a troll's horns act like an antennae, but instead of compensating for five senses, the horns can detect energy, aura, emotion, and basic intent. One would never be able to sneak up on a troll, nor would anyone be able to lie to a troll. The horns would pick up everything. What humans wish for in a sixth sense, the troll has. Which is why Eridan, who grew up with six senses, was horrified with the lack of horns, because they really are vital organs.

They detected the shift in magic as the curtains on the arch suddenly fluttered violently, so when a large, peach skinned…thing…came tumbling out of the arch, Eridan was already there and waiting, with Ahab's Crosshairs out and ready for danger. For a brief moment, the troll had heard cackling, and someone screaming out the word Sirius, before this creature fell into the chamber. Cautious violet eyes watched as the creature stood up, and it made a weak attempt to look around. As it did so, Eridan scanned its features.

This creature did fit the "fleshbag" moniker, as it has this light pink squishy looking skin that seemed to have no basic exoskeleton and, Eridan noted in horror, it lacked any sort of horn. Its ears were rounded at the top, which meant that it was a land-dweller, unlike the slightly folded point of a troll. Looking down at the hands, Eridan gleefully noticed the presence of five fingers, how fascinating! This was the live specimen he was looking for!

It was at this point that the alien turned toward the seadweller's direction, promptly widened its eyes (which were silver in the iris and the sclera was actually WHITE) and pulled a stick in his direction. Eridan's eyes widened. It was a wand! This alien was magical! However, his horns detected that this alien was on guard, and was ready to do harm. So the young violet blood flattened his earfins against his head and bared his teeth, growling. The alien seemed to note this, as well as the fact that there was indeed a VERY large gun pointed at his chest, and lowered his wand a fraction.

Eridan lowered his rifle a little, now just staring curiously at the alien facing him. It had to be an adult, and yet it looked rather scraggly, was it a stray? His earfins flared out again, and it seemed to intrigue the alien. At the current moment, both were at an impasse, neither wanting to lower their weapons in case the other struck them. Diplomacy was his only option at this point.

"If you put awway your wweapons I'll put awway mine."

The alien looked at him confused and now even more on guard, which made Eridan want to facepalm. Alien, right. The troll realized that there was a language barrier between them. Both figures stood there, not knowing what to do, until the seadweller gave a sigh. Looks like he'll have to take his chances. He capchalogged his rifle and put his palms up toward the alien, a universal signal for peace and ceasefire. The alien now dropped most of its weariness and relief pulsed around it. It put the wand up its sleeve and they both just stared at each other, at a loss for the next step.

Sirius honestly thought that he was done for when he was pushed through the Veil. Now he was very sure that he was alive, from the pain of the spell, but he was very confused. It seemed that while the Veil did not lead to the afterlife, it did lead SOMEWHERE. He stood up and scanned his surroundings, noting that he was in a chamber of some sort. As Sirius was about to explore, he turned to his other side to come face to face with a creature that was pointing a large blue object at his face, the tip glowing a brilliant white. He could actually feel the compressed energy flowing in the object, and if it were released…Sirius drew his wand.

This was apparently the wrong thing to do, because the creature just got agitated and growled at him and oh Merlin what sharp teeth it had. He looked at the creature, then at the gun, and realized that being a Gryffindor at this particular moment would not be a good idea at ALL. He lowered his wand and it lowered its…energy thing. It stared at him as if he were some animal to be studied, and let out a series of growls and clicks and purrs. Oh Merlin what did it just say. The creature actually rolled its eyes at him, before its gun suddenly DISAPPEARED INTO THIN AIR and it raised its hands in peace. Sirius let out a sigh of relief and put his wand back in his holster.

He took this time to study the creature, which honestly creeped him out a little bit. Because while it was most definitely NOT human, it was wearing muggle attire. A purple cape with a large cowl flowed around a black longsleeve that for some reason had a violet Aquarius symbol on it, and the black and blue striped pants reminded him of one of those muggle pirate movies that Lily once exposed them to, (because that's what a Marauder was, of course) and violet and blue sneakers. Part of its wavy raven colored hair was dyed violet, and it was brushed in a way so that it took on a lightning shape. The scarf that it had wrapped around its necked was horrifyingly like the Ravenclaw scarf, which briefly made Sirius wonder where on Earth it got that from. A pair of strangely shaped glassed were perched on the bridge of the creatures nose, and were it only for the attire, Sirius would have thought it was a muggle with weird fashion tastes, but the creature was far from human.

It was covered in grey skin that was far too smooth, as if it had an extra layer on top, and Sirius realized that it reminded him of the chitin exoskeleton of an insect. His eyes travelled to the creature's ears, which were actually…fins? Was it some sort of mermaid? Unnaturally glowing violet irises stared at him; the whites of its eyes were some sort of yellow that had a soft glow on its own. Black lips reminded him once again of those pesky merpeople that dwelled in the Hogwarts lake, and when the creature blinked he caught the almost imperceptible delayed shift that signaled the fact that this thing had two eyelids. A large pair of lightning shaped horns that had the color scheme of candy corn (or at least, close enough) grew from the top of its head. The creature had honest to Merlin claws, which were slightly curved and very, very sharp. It was the claws that made Sirius note the lack of a pinky on either hand. He also noted the rings, and he had the nagging feeling that he recognized some of them, but he couldn't pinpoint how.

"What are you?" he said, unknowingly.

A small trill came from the creature's lips, and it opened its mouth to say something in its weird language.

"I can't understand you. Wwe'll havve to wwork communication out some other wway."

Since Sirius had no idea what the creature was saying, all he could notice was that it had two rows of very sharp teeth. His eyes widened at that, and could only groan at the fact that he didn't know whether or not the creature wanted to kill him or not. Neither seemed to understand the other's language, so what was he supposed to do? It was then that Lily's science fiction movies popped into mind. He licked his lips, thinking. Well, why not? He doesn't really have much to lose…

Sirius put up his right hand, splitting his fingers into two sides. He then pointed to himself.

"Sirius."

The creature tilted its head, before carefully attempting the mimic the gesture. It then pointed to itself.

"Eridan."

Eridan. So that's the creature's name? Sirius processed this name before slowly reaching his hand out to it.

"Hello."

Eridan looked at the hand, then at Sirius, then back at the hand. It licked its lips in what Sirius hoped was nervousness (long violet tongue, oh was Sirius creeped out), and shook his hand.

"Greetins."

Sirius hoped Eridan said hello as well.

So what the voice screamed earlier was this alien's name. Sirius. Fascinating. Perhaps there was still some hope in learning more about this creature, and why it was here. At this thought, Eridan glanced at the arch, only to realize that the archway had suddenly become solid. Without any warning, he walked over to the archway, feeling the closed stone curtains. The symbols around the archway seemed to glow a little, but it fizzed out for some reason.

Sirius had followed after, and was now staring at the closed arch, its eyes looking as if it were having some sort of mental breakdown.

"…Sirius?"

Sirius was currently having a mental breakdown.

The Veil was closed, the curtains had closed and had turned to stone. What was worse, is that Eridan's reaction to this fact meant that it had no idea what was going on either. That's when Sirius noticed the engraving on the arch.

Department of Mysteries, Britain's Ministry of Magic, Earth

Sirius didn't know what was worse, the fact that the words were in English and clearly stated that it KNEW where it lead to (which in turn means the inscriptions on the other side of the Veil must be in Eridan's language) or the fact that it implies that Sirius was not, in fact, on Earth anymore. Somehow the Veil lead to another planet altogether, and that scared Sirius. What sort of magic was capable of this?

How could he get back home?

"…Sirius?"

Hearing his name, the dog animagus jumped up, and snapped his head toward the speaker. It was Eridan, who was looking down at its feet. Sirius saw the worried expression on its face, and he walked up to the creature. It was at that moment when Sirius stood towering over the creature did he realize how YOUNG Eridan was. It could only be around thirteen, and Eridan's mannerisms briefly reminded Sirius of Harry.

Harry…

He was probably freaking out back at home, and everybody probably thought he was dead. Clenching his fists, Sirius closed his eyes. No, he was getting out of here, and he's pretty sure Eridan would help him with that. Speaking of which, the creature was tugging his sleeve. When he looked down, Eridan pulled a little harder, backing up, before letting go and walking toward one end of the large chamber. A brick on the wall was pushed in to reveal another room, and when Sirius took a look inside, his jaw dropped in horror.

Four wizard skeletons were draped onto chairs, long ago wasted away in this chamber, probably. Eridan must have discovered them like this, but it was still frightening to see corpses just lying around like this. Another tug on his sleeve by Eridan directed him toward the shelves that lined the walls. Potions, wands, quills, parchments, all which must have come from the robe pockets of these dead wizards, were place in a systematic order along the shared space. With a nod from Eridan, Sirius investigated what the creature had looted (well not really, these must have been dead for a long time, he shivered at that. The picture of these people dying of starvation because there was no exit horrified him) and realized that the parchment had writing on it.

Carefully he took one of the scraps down, and began to read. It was the records of an Unspeakable, who was investigating the Veil. At first it was formal, but it became more frenzied as the wizard realized that there was no exit, and that he could not Apparate. It ended with the wizard saying that nobody should ever come through the Veil, as it must have been some sort of torture device. Sirius read through another one, which was actually a witch, whose parchment contained a will, stating that she had no next of kin and therefore whoever finds this keeps all of her belongings. He paled when he saw that the signature read 'Heidi Ravenclaw" and glanced at Eridan, who was sitting in a muggle wheelie chair with its elbows on its knees and its hands tucked beneath its chin. It was then that he noticed the Ravenclaw ring on Eridan's finger, and looked at the scarf around its neck, and put the three pieces together.

Groaning internally, he went through the other parchments which were a similar mix of the first letter and the will. Seeing nothing more of help, Sirius put them back on the shelf, knocking over a stone that was in the space next to it. This made Sirius freeze, and picked up the small read stone. It was engraved with many runes, and pulsed with stored magic. Recognizing it, the Black grinned. He turned around to face Eridan, who was still watching him, and held up the stone. This only made Eridan tilt his head in confusion, before the violet eyes widened as Sirius pulled out his wand and tapped the stone, muttering an incantation under his breath. The stone glowed a little, before changing color from red to blue. Sirius grinned as he placed the stone in the crevice of his ear. This stone was a godsend.

Now it was Eridan's turn to be confused. What had Sirius done to the stone? Why was it blue? Why was it in its ear? It was then that Sirius spoke in his alien language, and Eridan sighed exasperatedly.

"Brilliant."

"Look, neither of us can understand the other besides our names. Sayin anythin in your alien language is not really goin to help much."

To Eridan's surprise, Sirius chuckled, and started laughing before taking the stone out of his ear (with the voice and the laugh, Eridan supposed Sirius was a male). He then made to give it to Eridan, and motioned for him to put it in the crevice of his earfin. Eridan complied with one eyebrow raised high.

"I don't see how this helps."

Sirius moved to the earfin that had the stone in it, and spoke.

"Do you understand me now?"

Eridan gave a yelp and jumped back and stared at Sirius in shock. The alien repeated himself again.

"Do…you…understand…me…now?"

Eridan let the words, Alternian in the earfin with the stone and Sirius's native tongue in the other, and their implications sink in for a moment. The stone could translate foreign speech, which was very useful, but only one of them could use it at a time. Since Eridan had already been studying the alien language for a while, it would be easier for him to pick up on the alien language instead of Sirius trying to learn Alternian. Having a near-photographic memory helps in this case, even if Serket hated the fact that she couldn't dupe him twice the same way.

"Und…er…stand…you…noww…" Eridan articulated, hoping those were the right pronunciations.

Sirius blinked once, twice.

"Say that again?"

"Again…Understand you noww. Sirius." Yep, Eridan just spoke English.

Sirius gave the boy (Eridan sounds like a boy…right?, he thought) a large grin.

"Wow kiddo, you learn fast!"

Eridan gave him a sharp-toothed smile in return.

"This will make things SO much easier! Man I love magic!" Sirius said, pumping a fist into the air, before frowning. Did he break the Statute of Secrecy? Is that even possible here? Why is he worrying?

"Sirius…?" Eridan asked quietly, before the animagus put both hands on the kid's shoulders.

"Did you know about magic? Before me? Hell, do you even count in the Statute of Secrecy?"

"I…knoww… about… magic. Before you." Sirius sighed in relief, before he noticed Eridan's nervous gaze.

"What's wrong, kiddo?"

"I…learn magic?" Sirius furrowed his brows at that, Eridan wanted to learn magic?

"You've never been taught magic?"

Eridan shook his head.

"Do you have magic?"

Eridan looked at him, confused. He then scrunched up his face, trying to think, before huffing and taking the stone out of his ear…fin…thing, then offered it back to Sirius who put it back in his ear.

"No one on Alternia, as I knoww of, does magic. In fact, I had to learn through books that it even existed. Most of the other trolls laugh at me because they believve it doesn't exist. I wwant to learn magic because it feels RIGHT. There's somethin about it that makes me feel…I belong…"

Sirius stared at Eridan, processing what the kid said. While his heart went out to the poor kid, if there really was no magic in his planet, it was going to be very tough telling the kid that he can't do magic. Other than that, Sirius had just gained more information about his whereabouts. The planet he was on is called Alternia, and the race Eridan belonged to are called…trolls? Sirius looked Eridan over, then thought back to the Mountain Trolls back on Earth. There was a very stark different between the two, and Eridan seemed incredibly intelligent, even for a youngster like him.

Which was why it was going to be painful telling Eridan that he wasn't magical, and if he was, there was no way Sirius would be able to tell the troll that for sure. Unless…

He picked the stone out of his ear and gave it to Eridan again, who popped it back into his ear/fin.

"Have you used any of those wands?"

Eridan grimaced.

"Wwands…" he then made a noise like an explosion, and pointed to one of the chair legs.

However, Sirius smiled. If Eridan was not magical, then the wands would have done nothing, but it was evident that the troll had at least some amount of magic in him.

"Then, kid, you can learn magic, if you choose to come back with me."

Eridan's fevered nodding made Sirius grin harder, but then the troll stopped.

"Come back…wwith you…" then pointed to the archway, which was still blocked.

"If we can find out how to get out, you'll help me, right?"

"I'll help you. Right."

AN:

Oni: That's all for this time! I hope you liked it!

Eridan: Hope you liked my renderin...damn fanon Eridan...

Fanon!Eridan: Wweh nyeh buckets

Eridan: Oni, would you do the honors?

Oni: Of course~

Fanon!Eridan: Nyeeeeeh noooo

Eridan: Good he's dead.

Oni: Yup!

Eridan: Anywways, leave a revvieww wwhile you're here, or I'll blast you wwith Ahab's Crosshairs.

Oni: See you next time-

Eridan: Or not-

Oni: My pretties!