When the Cradle Falls

Chapter Forty: You're Never Gonna See Me Again

It was dark.

And Noah hated that.

He was alone, and evidently had all the space in the world. It was like he was floating in some distant corner of the universe. Some place that was not even dreamt up by NASA, something that didn't exist in the mind of anyone at all.

But still, every time he reached out, it was like there was a thin, foreign object pressing against him.

And now, it had only taken a handful of times of him reaching out before he heard the loud speaking, yelling, and screams.

Like he was trapped in a glass bottle, the entirety of the glass—or universe—around him vibrated with vigor. As a result, his entire body reacted violently. To retract from the noise, his instinct was to pull into himself as close as he could, his feet barely keeping him stable.

He heard things. They were definitely voices that he recognized. He heard Cara first. Then Uncle Sam. Some other voices were garbled in the input. He was still in the dark, but periodically there was input—then it was Mommy.

And for a while—probably really only a few seconds there was silence. Or maybe it was another a while.

When the questionable silence ended there was a tantrum in Noah.

Like the beyond his skull was trying to escape, everything erupted; the earthquake awaiting the most precarious fault line.

His vision blacked and blurred and blacked and blurred again.

A tumultuous vault—like the feeling of falling while you're sleeping—catapulted Noah awake.

Blinking rapidly, Noah looked around himself, spread out flat on the ground

The immediate sight was strange; red paintings around where his outer knee and hand had fallen knee. Everything was blurry as he felt himself falling to his side, the last of Murmur's leaching memory was still clinging to him.

It wasn't the first time Noah felt that, as unfortunate as that was to say. And still, he was thinking "Thanks you asshole."

But really that was just a façade.

Still on the ground, he shook internally, still to all others, mind reeling.

But at that point, Alice was over her son, reviving the life that was precariously there.

Over her son, Alice was panicked and poised to start CPR. But like a strange miracle, Noah was already alert and breathing sharply.

"Noah," Alice whispered several times, at different intervals. She eventually whispered "Noah" a few more times.

More than a few moments passed, before Noah arose, looking strangely relieved.

Turning his head to his mother, Noah spoke. "I want to sleep."

Immediately nodding, Alice obliged by cradling his body, in which Noah immediately fell limp.

Alice was halfway across the yard before Noah started writhing. He wrenched enough that his body fell to the grass. When he fell he was chanting "vulture vulture vulture."

During that unholy chant, the sky had disappeared and a saint had taken it's placed.

Knees on the grass, Alice was over her slightly cataleptic son. He was somewhat aware, but also dazed and somewhat conscious.

"Noah…Noah?"

There was a space in the air.

"Ma?"

"It's Mommy. I'm here. Mommy is here."

Disoriented, Noah felt like his world was crooked and upside down. But still he felt. "Mommy?"

Upon hearing that, Alice melted and wrapped herself around her son. "Baby, I'm here. Noah: you are Noah and you are here. Mommy is here for you."

It pained herself that he had already been there before.

"Mom," Noah's voice cracked. His throat felt scratchy. He knew he had been screaming. He remembered what that felt like.

Feeling his head turn, Noah noticed his Uncle Sam halfway up, propped against the outer wall of the garage. There was blood gushing from his nose and one of his eyes was black and swollen shut. Bobby knelt near him, offering a dirty rag.

Noah imagined he probably didn't look much better.

Like the first time with being possessed, Noah felt sluggish, like he had just woken up disorientated from a long nap, the information slowly coming back to him. He remembered being on the playground at school and then suddenly everything was fuzzy. He knew he had been possessed but wasn't exactly sure how it happened or what had happened.

"Is Uncle Sam okay?" Noah asked, directing the question towards Bobby.

The only man gruffly nodded at the young boy, his eyes softening once he saw the state of his nephew. "He's tough. Just like you, kid."

The older man's calm demeanor relaxed Noah, which was in stark contrast with Alice's panicky fussing.

"Mom, I'll be fine," Noah repeated Bobby's words, swatting away one of her fluttering hands that had smoothed down his hair for about the dozenth time.

Helping him sit up, Alice reigned in the worry—just a bit. "We should go inside." It would be safer in there. Alice had never been so grateful for her aunt. That house was a fortress against all things paranormal.

"I need a shower," Noah agreed. With assistance, he was able to stand, Alice's arm wrapped around his shoulders.

As they headed to the back door of the house, a weak voice called his name.

Twisting, Noah turned to look at this uncle. Sam was still propped against the wall. Whatever beating they had taken, it seemed like he had gotten the brunt of it. "Noah, I'm so sorry."

"For what?"

"Noah, let's go inside," Alice suggested.

"Why are you sorry?" Noah asked again, fighting against his mother's tightening grip.

"It's nothing," she replied, glad that—for now at least—Noah didn't remember.

When Noah refused to budge, Alice sighed. "Sam, you have nothing to be sorry for. Noah, we'll sort it later, okay?"

Sam was surprised to hear there was no accusation in her tone. "Yeah, sure."

"Where's Dad?" Noah asked as they moved into the kitchen.

"He went to get painkillers for you and Sam. He was there when we got that evil bastard out of you."

Now that she was saying that, Noah did remember his dad being there.

"And Cara?"

"Huh?" Alice asked. She was over the sink, wetting a rag.

"Where is she?"

"She's upstairs."

"I need to talk to her." Noah didn't remember why, but he knew there was something important that he had to talk to her about.

"Noah, she's resting. You can talk to her later. She's been through a lot today too."

"What do you mean she's been through a lot today? What happened?"

Alice stopped what she was doing and turned to look at her son. There was blood along his hair line and some other bruises, but other than that, Alice observed he was much less injured than the first time. "After Murmur possessed you…he kidnapped Cara. Held her captive until we showed up." She was very matter of fact with her words, making a point to separate Murmur from Noah.

"You mean I did." Noah felt like he wanted to throw up.

"It wasn't you. You know that."

"It might as well have been. I felt everything he felt. And I know that soon I'm gonna remember everything he did."

Alice pulled up a kitchen chair and sat next to her son. "That was not you. I know you, Noah. You are my son and you are good."

"Noah looked down. How come it doesn't feel like I'm good right now?"

Her heart broke hearing that. He was too young and too pure to be asking something like that. She hated that his childhood and peace of mind had been snatched from him. Even more, it seemed like no matter what they did, it was impossible to keep him and Cara safe. It seemed like disappearing off the face of the earth would be the only way that they would be okay.

"You are good. That feeling is just the rest of the demon leaving you." She really didn't know what she was saying, but she had to do something to help him.

"Really?" Noah looked up at her.

Alice nodded. "Yeah. Just like how the memory comes back to you, the feeling leaves you. The more time that passes, the better you'll feel. And then after a while, you'll start to forget too."

He thought about that. Maybe she was right. He did remember the first time, but it also did feel like it happened a long time ago. "So I'm gonna be okay?"

She sighed. "Yes, baby. You're gonna be just fine."

He breathed a little easier hearing that. "Okay. I think I'm gonna head upstairs. You know. Take a shower."

She nodded. "I'll be up in a few minutes, okay?" She chucked him on the cheek and went to stand at the back door. Sam was on his feet, arms crossed. He was looking down at the ground in shame. Dean was now there, a white paper pharmacy bag tucked under one arm. Bobby stood nearby. She could tell they were in the middle of a tense conversation.

Looking back, she heard Noah clambering up the stairs and slowly opened the back door, joining the trio of men outside.

He stopped on the landing and looked around the dark hallway. It was where had spent the first few years of his life. Reaching for the nearest door, Noah slowly pushed it open. The familiar whine of the door moving into placed revealed the room untouched by time. There was a small toddler racecar bed flush against the baby blue wall. A maroon rug dominated most of the floor. There was a light wood dresser that stood bare nearby.

The one thing Noah hadn't missed about Aunt Jan's house until they moved out—and especially more once she died—was the fact this place was like a museum. Yeah, the whole place was a big dark and creepy, the unchanging nature of the place was a comfort he hadn't really known when he lived there.

His vision swept out of the scope of his old room to the adjacent door.

Moving in front of that, Noah slowly turned the knob. This door was the only one in the house that didn't shriek in hysteria was it was opened or closed.

The door swung to reveal a room that was captured in time like Noah's. It was the same to his, only difference were the pink walls and the canopied white bed. There was an occupant on the bed, back facing the door, sitting.

Frowning at why Cara was sitting on the bed, staring at the wall, he announced himself. "What are you doing?"

Spooking at the noise, Cara turned. For a moment, she thought it was the demon, but from the concerned expression, she knew it was her brother. Normally, she would've run up and grabbed him in a hug, but the flat void her mind was currently in stopped her.

"Care."

"What?"

"I asked what you're doing."

She frowned, realizing she hadn't answered his question. "Just thinking."

"Well that's never a good thing," Noah tried to joke. Neither of them really found it funny.

Coming closer to the bed, Noah sat on the edge. Cara had gone back to staring at nothing. He noticed her unconsciously rubbing her wrists. Her fingers moved over red lattice patterns that were forming.

A flash went through Noah's mind, and he caught of memory of the demon tying an unconscious Cara to a chair.

"I'm so sorry."

"It wasn't you." She didn't sound insincere, just distant.

"Everyone keeps saying that."

"Murmur's not you and Phenex isn't me." Cara continued to stare ahead at nothing.

"Look…I hate to ask you this now, but could you…fill me in on what happened? I don't really remember everything yet."

"It'll come back to you."

"Cara, please."

"You owe me a new phone."

"What?"

"You broke my phone. Threw it against a wall."

"Oh. I'm…sorry."

There was silence. "Anything else?"

"I don't wanna talk about it."

"Please tell me what I did. Cara I—"

For the first time in their short conversation, Cara looked at him, exploding with emotion. "For fuck's sake! Will you just leave me alone? I told you I don't wanna talk about it, Noah!"

Electrified, and caught off guard by the expletive, Noah slowly stood and held his hands up. Was she afraid of him? She was definitely angry with him.

What did I do, he asked himself.

"I'm sorry. I'll leave you, okay? Sorry."

"Thank you," Cara huffed, spinning around so she was facing away from the wall. At least this time she was laying down. "And make sure you shut the door."

When Noah left and shut the door behind him, it was even quieter than when he had opened it.

Purposefully walking across the lawn, Alice broke the circle of men, not taking her eyes off Sam. "Sam."

Sam immediately averted his gaze. "Alice."

"We need to talk."

"Look, I'm so sorry—"

"What did the demon mean when it said it has plans for my son?"

Sam shrugged helplessly. "I don't know. Meg just meant that our powers are somehow linked to the Yellow Eyed Demon—

"We know that already! But I was specifics! What does that bastard want with Noah?"

"I don't know."

"Bullshit! That demon was in you. I heard it blabbing about an upcoming war—"

"Why don't you ask Noah?"

"He doesn't remember and I hope to God he doesn't!" Alice snapped back.

"Well, look I don't either. I'm really sorry Alice but I don't know what the demon meant."

Alice glared at Sam for a few more seconds, before realizing her anger at the demons was being misdirected at him. The combination of worry for her children, losing her job, anger at the demons, and motherly protectiveness had kept her in overdrive all day. "You're right. Sorry, I shouldn't blame you. You're a victim too."

"I wish I could offer you more information, Alice, really," Sam offered.

She nodded, feeling spent. Patting him on the shoulder, she turned to Bobby and offered the older man a smile. "Thanks for coming on such short notice."

"Come here, girl." Bobby reached forward and pulled her into a comforting hug. "You don't need to thank your family."

Once they pulled away, Bobby adjusted his baseball cap. "Right. You got those kids all sorted?"

Alice nodded.

Removing his keys from his jacket, he jingled them. "I'm heading out then. If you need anything, just call. But you idjits?"

"Yeah?" Sam and Dean responded at the same time.

"I better not get a call from you guys for a while. Try to stay out of trouble for at least a little bit, please?"

"Sure thing," Sam said.

"We'll be fine. Now get outta here you old man," Dean replied playfully.

Bobby's eyebrows raise. "Old? I'll show you old. I can still whoop you ass, boy. No respect," Bobby mumbled good naturedly under his breath, as he turned and exited the yard.

Bobby always gave a certain sense of peace to the group. It seemed like with him, everything always turned out okay. And you could always count on him to keep it together when shit was hitting the fan and everyone else was losing their mind.

Looking back and forth between Alice and Dean, Sam took a step back. "I should probably go too…"

"Sam." Dean's voice was hard and commanding; it almost reminded Sam of Dad. And it sure stopped him in his tracks.

Sam looked at his brother, feeling like a little kid about to be chastised.

"Look I just spent a week running across the damn country like an idiot trying to find you. Could you just hang out for a little bit?" The exasperation of his tone disguised the fact Dean was basically pleading with his little brother.

Sam nodded, relieved Dean wasn't mad with him anymore. The time he was possessed forced him to think about what John had said to Dean. And maybe now, a little bit of Sam understood why John had said that. He was just grateful Dean still wanted him around, after the worry and crap Sam had put everyone through that week. "And Dean, about what Dad said—"

Dean quickly held up a hand. "We'll figure it out."

"Right. Well, I'll give you guys a second to talk."

"Here, why don't you take this inside?" Dean passed off the bag of painkillers to his brother. From the looks of him, it was obvious Sam could use a few magic pills.

When Alice and Dean were alone the backyard, she turned at glared at the garage in the corner. "I wanna torch that entire building. Nothing good has ever happened there."

"Maybe we should," Dean agreed, staring at the building. Just like last time, he knew they were going to have to scrub and clean it down, just in case some nosy neighbor or some asshole from the city came knocking. He was surprised they hadn't found some crackhead squatting in there before.

She then turned her gaze to the house. "I hope they're both sleeping by now."

"We'll check on them in a few minutes. If they're in the house, they're safe."

"It's not fair how much they've been through, Dean. I mean they're just kids."

He sighed. "I know. It's not." He reached forward and tucked Alice into his chest.

She gently removed herself from his chest. "I can't do this shit again. I'll literally die if something like this happens again."

"We'll protect them. Nothing will touch them again," Dean assured, believing every breath he breathed.

Bristling, Alice knew it was already a broken promise. "They're not safe. We've tried," she heaved with a deep sigh.

"What the do you mean? Noah dropped his anti-possession charm this time. It wasn't our fault."

"So what then? We're supposed to leave up their safety to a wing, a prayer, and what? A bracelet?"

"Well damn Allie you know we've done everything we can for them!" Dean snapped back, not liking that she was basically accusing him of not doing everything he could to take care of his family. He already knew what he was doing wasn't enough to keep him safe. And usually she was on his side, but this time it seemed like she was tearing into him.

"It's not enough!"

"What are we supposed to do? Keep them locked in this house forever?"

"Hey it's an idea!" Alice retorted.

"I was joking."

"Well maybe I'm not."

"We're not doing that," Dean responded.

She raised her eyebrows. "Excuse me?"

"I am not gonna put my kids through the same shit I had to go through when I was their age. You are not robbing them of their chance at a real childhood!"

The air was somehow sucked out of the sky and replaced by a thick tension.

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean that," Dean suddenly said.

"I'm not the demon that robbed them on their childhood," she said quietly.

"I know. I didn't mean it."

"You know something funny?"

Dean frowned. "What?"

"Maybe my parents had the right idea."

"About what?" Dean couldn't possibly imagine anything right Jim and Sherry Mercer had done during their career as parents, especially from Alice's perspective.

"Maybe they were strict and overbearing, but at least I was always safe. Nothing bad ever happened to me when I was there."

Wisely, he held his tongue about him meeting her. Based upon that implication, he was the first bad thing that had happened to her. And honestly? Dean didn't disagree with her.

"Yeah, but you were miserable your entire childhood, Allie."

She didn't deny that. "I was safe at least."

Dean comfortingly rubbed her arm. "We'll figure something out. For now, let's go see the kids."

A Few Days Later

Batavia, Illinois

Scraping of metal on glass was the only sound that was heard in the dimly lit kitchen. Diligently, the figure at the counter was bent over, completely focused on the task at hand.

Pouring powder into two mugs, hot water followed and was mixed around.

The figure grabbed one mug in each hand and ascended the stairs, stopping at a slightly ajar door. After a light rapping, a voice from within told the figure to come in.

Stepping into the room, Alice held up two mugs. "Hot chocolate."

"Yes please," Noah said, reaching for the closest mug. He cradled it to his chest, sipping greedily.

"Careful, it's hot," Alice cautioned, just as Noah coughed from the head of it.

"Told you," she said quietly.

Moving over, she set the other mug in front of Cara, who was sitting up in her bed. Ever since the incident from a few days ago, the girl had almost been completely silent.

"She still not talking?" Alice asked.

"Not really."

That was pretty concerning for Cara. Sure, the girl wasn't a big talker and when she was pissed, she was known for giving everyone the silent treatment if she had a grudge. However, this was different. There was no anger. Just apathy.

"Here, Cara, have some hot chocolate. It might help you sleep." Alice physically took Cara's hand and closed it around the handle of the mug.

Nodding blankly, Cara obediently took a small sip, not bothering to look at her mother or the cup.

"Good girl," Alice said, smoothing down her hair.

"Mom, what's wrong with her?" Noah asked.

Alice sighed and sat down on the bed between them. "You still don't remember?"

Noah knew it was just the demon and Cara for a while, but it was weird. He had no recollection, other than flashes. Such as throwing baseballs at her, tying her wrists, and smacking Cara across the face. Really horrible stuff. But still, he didn't remember what he said.

"No. I have no idea."

"Well, when Cara's feeling up to it, I'm sure she'll tell us what's bothering her."

"I'm just really worried about her." Alice didn't let on that she was worried about Cara too. Noah didn't need to think anything else could've been his fault.

"Everyone deals with trauma in a different way."

"But even after the first time with Phenex, she didn't act like this."

"Even the same person may react differently to two different traumas, Noah. Sometimes the human mind doesn't make any sense."

He pondered that, not really sure what to say. "Drink your cocoa. You two have had a tough few days. I know neither of you have been sleeping well."

Noah sighed, realizing his mother was right, continuing to gulp down his drink.

"Mom, when are you gonna go back to work?"

Alice smiled at Noah sadly. "Maybe next week, baby."

"And when do I get to go back to school?"

"Soon."

The trio sat in silence for a while. Alice rubbed Noah's back as he steadily drank his coffee. After being reminded a few times, Cara was robotically sipping and swallowing the liquid.

About fifteen minutes passed and both kids were finally done with their cocoa. Noah set his on nearby window sill, nearly pitching off the bed when he leaned forward.

Calmly grabbing him, Alice reset him.

"Whoa, Mom, I feel weird."

"What do you mean?"

"I feel like really tired."

She gave him a small smile. "I told you the cocoa would help. Why don't you lie down?"

Noah began to stand. "I'm gonna go sleep in my own bed then." He wobbled on his feet and fell back onto the bed. "What's wrong with me?"

Alice knelt down next to him on the bed. "Shh, everything is fine. Just go to sleep. I'm here for you."

Noah's confusion turned into soft protestations, and within a few minutes, he was snoring softly.

Content he was asleep, Alice moved to Cara and plucked the empty mug that was settled onto her lap.

Taking a deep breath, Alice removed herself from the room and power walked to the kitchen. She carefully washed and dried the mugs, leaving them upside down beside the sink. She took a small orange bottle that had been set beside the mugs and stared at it. Part of her to flush the pills down the sink, but instead she placed it into her cardigan.

Moving pretty quickly after that, Alice grabbed her cell phone that was on the counter. She took out the sim card, and took both the phone and the card, and stomped it underfoot.

Taking the pieces, she dumped those down the sink and ran the disposal, probably breaking it.

But that didn't matter.

The next thing Alice did was move to her closet and pull out a few bags she had kept packed. They were in the far back corner, shoved behind a dresser.

Grabbing those, she moved downstairs and opened the door to the garage. Quickly, she put those in the trunk and shoved them in. She moved her Illinois license plates to one side so they were out of the way.

After closing the trunk, Alice made her way back upstairs. She stopped in Cara's room, where both kids were passed out on the bed.

Alice grabbed Cara first. Neither kid was exactly tiny anymore, so carrying them down the stairs and into the car took quite a bit of effort. And once Cara, wrapped in a blanket, was safely in the backseat, Alice went up to retrieve Noah.

Same as with Cara, she wrapped him in a blanket, making sure to shut off all the upstairs lights as they went.

Once both children were in the backseat, Alice opened the garage door and slowly reversed out.

She idled in the driveway for a moment, staring up at the beautiful place she had called home for so many years. It was where the kids had started school and where they had made all their friends.

It was where Dean had found them again.

It was also where every demon knew where they were.

Pulling out that driveway was the bravest thing Alice thought she was ever going to do.

Little did she know it was just the beginning of the unraveling of their family.