Chapter Eighteen: Dehydration and Revelation
Present Day
Dehydration occurs when a person has gone too long without the replenishment of water lost from the bodies stores. Water is what makes up the majority of a person's body, it is what is needed for nearly every single function. Without it, a person cannot survive.
Sakura was his water.
To die from dehydration, it can be a long and painful death. Before death comes, a person can experience symptoms that vary between slight discomfort to extreme pain. Among those symptoms are cramping, vomiting, headaches, rapid heart beat, and lethargy. During dehydration people can begin to act abnormally as confusion and irritability take over. Their minds begin to make up hallucinations and they begin to see what they want to see. The psychological torture of such a thing can make a person go mad.
Mad, Sasuke had gone.
There have been many accounts of humans who have gone through severe dehydration and survived. Most of them, poor unfortunate souls that had been lost at sea or forced to wander in the desert. All of them have their own unique story of how they survived. Not only did they survive, but they endured.
Some of them were alone while others were in groups. Some who started with groups, ended their survival alone, their partners having not been able to survive. Some died due to their physical bodies giving out, others were taken by wild predators, and others sustained injuries that resulted in a fatal accident.
In one such story, two men were lost at sea. After several months, one of them gave up. He laid down, stopped eating, and starved to death. The other man also considered such a thing, but after having endured such misery for such a length of time already, he decided to persevere. He was convinced that it would all be worth it as long as he was able to survive and drink again.
Sasuke had wanted to give up.
Death would have been welcomed long ago. It was something that Sasuke had hoped for at one time, so long as it would stop all the pain and anguish. But Sasuke was not mortal. He could not just lie down and die. No matter how long he went without water he would remain.
So Sasuke continued to endure and search for his water.
Now, at this moment, Sasuke understood what the second man had meant. Despite the hundreds of years of pain and anguish, despite the torture and the feeling of no longer being in control, he would do it again. All of it. So long as it meant even just a mouthful of water.
It had been worth it to endure.
They tell you when rehydrating it should be done slowly. After the body has gone without water for so long, it will reject it and get sick. To prevent this, one should take small frequent sips of water until fully restored. It sounds simple enough, but what they don't tell you is how hard it is to stop. They don't tell you that the thirst only increases when you get that first sip of life giving water.
Sasuke knew he should have stopped. He knew he should have taken only small sips. But when she began to reciprocate, when her lips began to move along with his like a synchronized dance, it was like turning the tap full force and telling a man just out of the desert not to drink.
It was impossible.
His lips were warm as they pressed softly onto hers. Sakura stared cross eyed at him for one long moment. His dark eyes were closed off to her as his long lashes gently rested above his cheeks.
He was kissing her. He was kissing her. He was kissing her!
It was not her first time receiving such a gesture. There had been a handful, but every time she received such a token she was also hit with the hard feelings of betrayal. Her betrayal. Yet, the longer his lips remained on hers, she realized something. The feeling of treachery was not there. She waited for it to appear but it never came. Only one impression came to her. The impression that this was right. It felt right in more ways than one. Perhaps she was not fully recovered and not thinking straight, perhaps it was the after effects of her dreams from earlier that morning, or maybe it was the undeniable allure he had held over her since she first met him. Whatever the reasons, be it none or many, she gave it no more thought as she gave into it.
Her eyes fell closed.
He was kissing her.
And she was kissing him back.
It started out soft and slow. For one second, just after she began to move her lips with his, he paused. It was minuscule and could have easily been mistaken as nothing but a pause for breath. But the small gasp that sounded along with it told her it was more than just a pause for air. He was surprised.
However surprised he was, he recovered quickly. For it did not take long before his lips began pressing against hers far more aggressively than before. Sakura did not even hesitate to keep up. Their mouths moved together more vigorously, nearly hungrily. It was like something within her snapped and without pause, she was climbing into his lap to deepen the kiss. Her tongue broke through his lips and she savored the taste of him.
She was lost. Lost in the feel of his hands gripping tightly onto her waist as if to anchor her to him. Her own hands wandered around his neck, grasping onto the back of his hair and pulling him closer to her. It was frightening how much she needed him closer. They were pressed tightly, lips sealed against each other yet even then, it was not close enough.
Her heart was beating wildly. She could feel it crashing against her ribs as if it was about to be dislodged from its proper place within her chest. Next to her racing heart her lungs burned. And her mind was like entering the consciousness of a feral and wild animal. There was no thought, just instinct. The intensity of it all was too much. It was a loss of control she had never experienced before.
He pulled away slightly and began to move to her neck. Her head fell back as she let out a small hum of approval and let herself enjoy the trickling sensation that was taking over at every point in which they were connected.
"You left me for so long," he mumbled between nips as he latched on and gave a particularly hard suck.
At his words, her mind slowly began to catch up and register what she was feeling and doing. Or at least it tried. Everything about it felt right but once logic began to settle, it was all wrong. Sasuke was a demon. She was an angel. That in itself should have been enough. But that was not what stopped her. What truly caused her to rip herself away from him, was the fact that this, none of it, was real.
The girl. The one that Sasuke had told her of. The mortal girl that he had mistaken her as reincarnated version of. That was the one he was kissing, the one he was thinking about, not her.
As for herself, an explanation for her actions...well that could only be blamed for the dreams she had been having. Some type of pent up frustration that had driven her to react in such a way. It could be the only explanation. She should not be feeling such things for one who was still practically a stranger.
In a burst of energy she pushed herself off of him and backed away. Her back hit the railing on the other side of the dock and she stopped. She stared at him, wide eyed as her chest heaved for breath that it was in desperate need of. But even with air flowing in and out, it was not enough. She felt a crushing force around her torso. With each breath it became tighter as an invisible force continued to pull. Pull and tug her towards him.
Sasuke looked dazed and disheveled. His hair was a mess and his shirt was crumpled and pulled up slightly, exposing tantalizing definition that Sakura had dreamed of just the night before. Sakura felt her body begin to burn. It was far more enticing in person.
She had done that, she had been the one to pull herself into his lap and encourage him. None of this was his fault, it was hers. She had led him astray from the beginning. He was the demon yet it was she who had misguided him, made him think that she was something far greater to him than what she really was. She had set out to help him but now, after what she had just done, she realized her mistake. She had fed his fantasy, not helped him.
He seemed to recover from the sudden shift in the mood as his face turned to one of concern, which only made her feel worse. He moved to stand from the bench but she thrust a hand up.
"No don't," she halted.
Her hand went up to her mouth, tracing her lips where they still tingled. Oh how she wanted the now fading sensation to be renewed. But such thoughts were banished. They were wicked cruel thoughts. A fitting punishment for her deceit.
"Sakura," Sasuke said, bringing her attention back to him. He looked how she felt. Scared and wary. Like someone approaching a cornered animal, he lifted his hands in the air. "It's alright. I promise I will find a way for this to make sense. I am sure you are confused…"
She shook her head. No. She could not do this to him any longer. It surprised her how much she had grown to care about him over the weeks. At some points it felt like that care for his well being had always been there, but that did not make sense.
"I should not have done that," she blurted. She needed to leave, she needed to free him. She was like a synthetic version of a drug he was addicted to. It made him feel like he was getting what he craved but in reality, it was just a mimic of what he wanted. It was not real, just a transference. If he knew what she really was he would hate her. That thought hurt far more than it should have. "Sasuke you are confused," she continued. "I'm not who you think I am. I am not what you think I am."
Sasuke shook his head, a panic coming to his eyes as he noticed her beginning to side step towards the ramp that would lead to her escape. "No," he argued. "You are, you just don't remember," he said firmly.
She watched his eyes dart in the direction of her escape route as his body gave out a small twitch. As if to move forward and block her escape.
Her heart began to beat for a whole new reason now. She could see it in his eyes, he was panicked and scared just as she was, but for a different reason. He was worried she was going to leave, which was exactly what she meant to do, and something about his body language made her question if he would let her or not.
"I should go," she announced, hoping that if he knew her intentions he would not feel as panicked. Just so long as she kept it casual.
"No," he said, immediately getting to his feet.
She took several hurried and stumbled steps away, startled by his speed. Before she could manage to catch her balance, his hand was wrapped around her wrist, in a grip that was far tighter than she liked.
"Sasuke," she said, trying to sound calm. "I want to go home."
He was silent for a moment before he finally nodded. Relief washed over her only to retreat back like a tide when he spoke again. "I will take you. Where do you live?" He was not going to let her go so easily.
Sakura's mind raced. There was no way she could tell him that she lived in the heavens. That would cause questions that could reveal the truth. As much as she currently felt guilty for lying to him, she could not bring herself to reveal such things. Already she was beginning to feel that twinge of fear when she had first encountered him. But this fear stemmed from a whole other type of horror. It had nothing to do with her safety and everything to do with his hatred and personal despise of her.
"It's okay," she said, trying to pull her arm free of his grasp.
His hold tightened. "Sakura," he said in a warning tone. "I just watched you collapse on the floor for no apparent reason and practically have a seizure. If you think I am letting you go home alone, you are sorely mistaken." His wings erupted from his back, either out of annoyance or preparation.
Immediately Sakura knew she could not let him take her. There was something in his tone, something underlying the concern that was unstable. She now understood what people meant by his unpredictability. She had thought he was just misunderstood, thought that she knew him. But now she was beginning to realize she had been naive. Like a spool of thread rolling on the ground, she was watching him unravel.
She tried to pull her arm free again but she did not even manage to let her arm slip fractionally from his grip. "Sasuke," she said, a hint of panic showing. "You're hurting me."
It was a lie but it was her only hope to free herself without using her unnatural strength. She looked up from where his hand was latched around her arm. His face was pinched and his eyes were hard. He was looking at her but not. While his gaze fell on her, she could tell he was spacing out as he fought with something internally.
Suddenly, his eyes flashed red and he seemed to snap out of his stupor. "I am sorry Sakura but I can't let you go. Not this time."
"I'm not going anywhere," she lied as tears began to pour from her eyes. She pulled at her arm, her body now thrashing to free herself from his grip. "Please! I just want to go home."
She released the smallest amount of chakra and pushed him away from her, all the while yanking her arm free. He stumbled back several feet, surprise coming to his eyes. She was not sure if it was out of shock that she broke free or if he had sensed the chakra. Most would miss it but with his Sharingan activated she was unsure. She could only hope it would be a lost thought that would be distracted by her next actions.
She ran.
Ran as fast as she dared without exceeding a supernatural speed that would be abnormal for a human. Her foot caught her other foot as she turned sharply to sprint up the ramp. She fell hard on her knees and the sting in them told her she had suffered minor abrasions.
In a scramble she was back to her feet, not bothering to look behind herself as she heard the pounding of steps behind her. Panic set into her as her tears blurred her vision. She wasn't sure why she was crying, be it out of fear or pain. The pull she had always felt toward him was almost painful as it seemed to be physically constraining her, and then she realized that it was not the pull, it was Sasuke. He had his arms wrapped around her, pinning her to the ground.
"Sasuke stop," she screamed in desperation as she wriggled beneath him. "Please."
She needed help, she needed to defend herself but even now, Kakashi's rules flashed through her mind. It was ironic. His rules had claimed to be there for her safety yet now it was inhibiting her. She managed to roll onto her back and began to frantically beat at his chest and face. Everything was blurred by the steady stream of tears as she choked out sobs of pleas.
For a moment she thought she had somehow released chakra into one of her punches as the heavy pressure was lifted from her. She remained tight eyed and on her back, waiting for another attack. When it did not come, she cracked her eyes open.
He was sitting on the backs of his legs, his face one of pained horror as he stared at her. He moved slightly, as if to touch her but she scrambled backwards, her eyes opening wider in panic as she stared at him.
"Sakura."
Her name was slowly formed on his lips but she did not give him time to finish. She bolted. Ignoring the throbbing pain in her knees when she had fallen, she ran as fast as she dared. There was no telling if he was following or still sitting on the boardwalk, stunned from whatever shock had caused him to stop.
She looked behind herself as she rounded the corner, checking to make sure he was not following. It was then she ran into something sturdy and warm, causing her to ricochet and fall to the ground. Hands grabbed at her and automatically she began to thrash but she soon found her arms pinned to her sides as two strong arms wrapped around her.
"Shhh," a voice soothed in her ear. A voice that was very familiar. "It's okay," Kakashi calmed. "It's just me. It's just me."
Her body relaxed and his arms loosened, letting her able to turn around and face the silver seraph. The moment she saw his more than half covered face and messy silver hair, she launched herself at him, wrapping her arms around his neck as she squeezed him tightly.
Tears soaked into the cotton of his shirt as she sobbed into his shoulder. "I just wanted to help him," she cried. "I thought I could save him."
Kakashi's hands pressed into her back, holding her closer to him. He let his chin rest on top of her head as he gave a heavy sigh. When he had followed her and found her with Sasuke he could have strangled her. Now, all he could do was comfort her. It was as he concluded before. None of this was her fault. Of course she wanted to fix Sasuke, it was what Sakura did. Heal and fix bruised and broken things. But how do you fix something that is no longer what it once was? Do you dare fix it? Or do you keep it weakened so it remains from being a threat?
As he felt her shoulders shaking beneath his grip, he tightened his hold as an anger arose. Sakura had been in danger. She could have been taken, all because she did not understand. And he could not be angry with her. This was not Sakura's fault, this was someone else's and it was high time they own up to their mistakes. Whether it started with good intentions, it had been an obvious mistake for some time. And it was time to fix it.
When she felt his grip loosen, Sakura took a step back and looked up at Kakashi. Her stomach dropped as soon as she saw his expression. There were a few times when she saw him express anything above lazy boredom. And few of those hardly bordered anything remotely past frustration. But right now, his expression was beyond irked, hardened with anger. She swallowed a gulp as he stared down at her, his single eye glaring.
"Sakura!"
Her name echoed down the alley as Sasuke's voice cried out to her, full of desperation, anguish, and regret. Before his voice had settled there was a flapping behind her and she turned to see Kakashi with his wings out. The silver seraph was staring back in the direction from where Sasuke's voice had called out to her.
"Come with me," he said in a hollow monotone.
It was worse than him yelling at her. And she dared not disobey. Without a word or question, she took flight right after his wings burst from his back and spurred upward. She heard Sasuke scream her name again as they moved higher up into the sky. Her wings seemed to work harder than usual as the resistance of the tug seemed to pull against her flee to the heavens, trying to tether her to the earth.
He did not say a single word as he dragged her down the marbled hallway. Sakura could only follow. Her legs, weak from the overwhelming feelings within her, struggled to keep up. She was positive only the momentum of him pulling her was the only reason why she was still standing. She was terrified of what was going to happen.
A flash of orange in the corner of her eye caught her attention and she turned her head to look down the adjacent hallway to see Naruto.
"Hey Kakashi, Sakura!" he bellowed boisterously down the hall. "Where have you guys been I've been lookin' everywhere for you! Huh?"
Kakashi did not even pause as he continued to walk past Naruto. Sakura heard Naruto's footsteps follow behind as well as the continuous line of questions that fell from the blondes mouth. She heard him speaking but his words became jumbled as she began to take notice of Kakashi's route.
She knew exactly where they were headed. Staring at the back of his silver head, she noticed the rigidness in her shoulders. When she ran into him earlier it had only been relief and security that she felt from him. But now, Kakashi was angry. He was furious. He was beyond anything she had ever seen.
The familiar cherry wood doors that rose from floor to ceiling came into sight when Kakashi took a sharp turn to the left. The silver and gold lines that had been carefully melted and hardened onto the frame glimmered as the midday sun shone through the open balcony that took up one side of the hallway. Kakashi did not even stop to knock or even pause. He threw the heavy doors open with ease as he pulled Sakura into the throne room, tugging her forward to stand in front of him as he displayed her to a perplexed Tsunade and a handful of council members.
"What is the meaning of this Kakashi," Tsunade said, sparing a brief look at Sakura then to Naruto who followed cluelessly behind, before looking back up to the gray winged seraph. "You cannot just barge in here during-"
"Tell her," Kakashi demanded, his dark eyes fixing onto his ruler as if it were he who was sitting upon a dias and giving commands.
Sakura twisted to look at Kakashi, confused when she realized that Kakashi was not speaking to her, but Tsunade. Anger and fury burned from his single visible eye. She turned back around to look at Tsunade. Her lips were pressed tightly as she stared right back at Kakashi. "All of you leave," she bellowed to the confused looking council members.
"Tsunade...what is the meaning-"
"I said leave!" she screamed as her fist came down onto the arm rest with a hard force. The sound of splintering wood echoed along with her command.
With a dull murmur of grumbles and complaints, the council slowly filed out of the room. Some of them gave Kakashi curious looks while others gave suspicious looks at Sakura. None of them bothered to even glance in Naruto's direction. All of their looks went ignored by both the silver seraph and woman sitting on the throne in the middle of the room. Instead they glared at each other, neither blinking or moving until the doors slammed shut.
After the echo of the heavy wood died, Kakashi finally moved forward, pushing Sakura with him. He stopped when they were at the foot of the dais. "Tell her," Kakashi commanded again.
"No."
Sakura's head moved back and forth between the pair as she tried to understand what was going on. "Tell me what?" she asked, her words drawing neither of their attention.
"Kakashi so help me, if you do not leave this room this very moment along with these two-" she pointed to Sakura then Naruto who was still standing near the doorway- "I will have you-"
"He found her," Kakashi cut in. "Sasuke has seen her, spoken with her…" He did not go into any further detail as to what they had done, mostly because it was still unknown to the extent of what they had done.
There was a long pause as Tsunade stared at him in disbelief. And then her attention finally moved to Sakura, terror and fear written across her face. Then it all disappeared as rage overshadowed the weaker emotions.
"Wait are we telling her what I think we are telling her?" Naruto suddenly asked, breaking the silence. Sakura looked back at him quizzically but was not given a chance to ask before Tsunade responded.
"We are not," she said firmly, standing up she pointed to Kakashi. "This is all your fault. You promised me that you would watch over her, keep her protected," she yelled as she began walking down the stairs. "You said he did not see her! You assured me he would disappear after a few days following the night you ran into him!"
"I didn't expect him to find her in broad daylight."
"Then maybe you should have been better at predicting his moves. The assurance of that was the only reason I allowed her to go down there!" Her eyes looked to Naruto who cowered under her glower. "And where were you? You are supposed to be watching her."
Naruto's mouth flapped open several times before he managed a defense. "I did not know she was going down today! She wasn't一"
"Save your excuses Naruto! I asked you to do one thing. I asked both of you to do it." She added as she moved her attention back to a hard faced Kakashi. "Was it so hard to keep her monitored?"
"Would you rather us keep her in a cage! Like you did the first one thousand years?" Kakashi bellowed. "She needed freedom. How could any of us predicted he was still looking for her after all this time."
"That boy isn't sane!" Tsunade shouted back. "He is obsessed, finding a way to bring her back has been his only motivation. How could you not know he would fin一"
Their arguing came to a halt when Sakura cut in with her own words. "He didn't find me!" Both of them looked at her and she took a small step away from Kakashi so she could look at them together. "It was an accident. We ran into each other at one of the night clubs," she looked at Kakashi. "That night I lost Deidara. We ran into each other, he had been stunned. I don't think he was expecting to see me let alone believe he was seeing me."
Kakashi stared at her then let out a sigh as he ran a tired hand through his hair. "I knew something was off when you came back," he mumbled with a shake of his head. He gave her a more direct look. "Why did you not say anything?"
Sakura's eyes flickered between the pair of seraphs then looked down at her feet. "I did not want to be kept away again." She looked back up just in time to see Kakashi throw Tsunade an accusing glare.
Kakashi glanced over his shoulder to Naruto. "Did you know of any of this?" Naruto shook his head violently, looking stunned in his silence. Kakashi looked back to Tsunade. "This is your fault," he said, pointing an accusing finger at her.
Tsunade stiffened at the accusation. "I did what I thought was best."
"A thought that was poorly planned and made evident long ago," Kakashi replied. "It's time you tell her. I would if I could but your damn command has silenced me every time the truth has neared the tip of my tongue," Kakashi hissed.
There was a long pause before Tsunade let out a heavy sigh. "Very well...I concede," she said quietly. There was silence for another moment and then Tsunade's honey eyes raised up to look at Sakura, her face serious and her eyes somber. "Sakura, before I tell you anything, I need you to promise me that you will listen with an open mind and try to understand why we did what we did. We had a purpose in keeping such things not just from you, but everyone.
"As you are well aware, I have kept you secluded from the majority of the seraphim world. Very few know of your connection with me as your adoptive mother. I told you it was to protect you from our enemies using you against me. It is why you have always been required to make yourself scarce when the fallen have come for diplomatic meetings. And it is why I had you keep your wings hidden in the heavens. I told you it was because others would not understand. As you know, Kakashi goes through his own trials with his own discoloration, but you would draw even more attention. I had you pretend you were mortal while on the earth because I said it would play to your advantage. And all of that is true. However the reason why I had you do this all was to hide the truth and keep others from being too curious about it all.
"The only people who know of the true reason, are standing in this very room with the exception of yourself. You were not told for fear of your safety. However, I now see perhaps that was a mistake. In your ignorance you have walked into a danger that was of no fault of your own.
"It is for this reason, and this reason only, that I allow you to have this knowledge. It is vital that you never speak of this openly to anyone but us. And even then, it must be with the utmost discreteness. If this knowledge were to fall upon the wrong ears; life, not just yours but everyone, every seraph, and every mortal, would be changed. And not for the better. Chaos would ensue. Therefore, I need to know that you understand the consequences of such knowledge and that you can be trusted with that knowledge."
Sakura's throat bobbed up and down. As much as she had always wanted to know of these secrets, the weight of it already seemed far more than she was willing, nor able to bare. However, she needed to know. Unable to open her mouth, she resorted to a single nod.
Tsunade mirrored the action, accepting her understanding. Clasping her hands behind her back, she began to stroll around the room. For a moment, Sakura did not move until she caught Kakashi's eye who nodded his head in a small command to follow. With small steps, she followed in the older woman's wake as Kakashi and Naruto took up the rear. They made their way towards the entrance before Tsunade veered slightly to the right and stopped beneath the large mural painted next to the door.
"Do you know how the seraphim came to be Sakura?" Tsunade asked as she came to a stop and turned around.
Sakura looked at the woman, suddenly she felt like she was back in the days when she was being lectured by her private tutor. The abrupt fear of not knowing the right answer set in, and she began to second guess all knowledge she had ever attained. "Um...we were created by the gods."
Tsunade's lips quirked at the answer that sounded more like a question. "Correct," she praised, "but do you know how they created us?"
Sakura came to a blank. She looked behind her to where Kakashi was standing, leaning on the pillar with his nose stuck in his book. He lifted his eyes from the pages to spare her a glance, only to raise an expectant brow before going back to his reading. She shot him a glare that went unnoticed then turned to Naruto. Naruto looked half asleep. A norm when it came to scholarly things and she knew that even if he knew the answer, he would be no help. She turned back around to Tsunade.
Tsunade gave her a fond look before turning around to look up at the picture behind her. Naturally, Sakura's eyes followed and she took in the piece of art that she had always admired when in the throne room. Her eyes went first to the beautiful woman that was the centerpiece of the painting. White, flowing hair fell down her bodice and pooled around her feet. She gazed down from her higher altitude with pearled eyes. Her beautiful face, painted to perfection of what all delicate beauty originated from. From the white strands that flowed from her head protruded a pair of horns that, while fierce and menacing, only served to enhance her celestial beauty as the lackerd shine to them contrasted strikingly against her pale hair. Within her perfectly manicured hands she held a pair of feathered wings as she held them out to the figures below her.
"We call Kaguya the mother goddess because it was her that brought us to life. She was the one who saw the need to guide mortal souls back to their heavenly realm. So she selected a number of mortals who would be the ones to do so. They all drank from a cup that had been filled with the blessed water of the heavens. Then, after they had drunk from the cup, she gave a part of her chakra to them. As the chakra flowed throughout their bodies, they began to change. Wings sprouted from their backs, their physics were strengthened and their senses were heightened, thus was the first seraphim ever created."
Tsunade turned away from the painting and examined Sakura, waiting for the reality of what she had just revealed dawn on her. Sakura stared back at Tsunade, unsure if she heard her teacher right. If she was understanding what Tsunade was saying, then that meant…
She looked back up to the painting, focusing on the people gathered around the hem of Kaguya's intricately woven dress and for the first time she looked, really looked at the people. They were all kneeling in a semicircle. Most of them looking up to the goddess with their hands outstretched to the pair of wings she offered down to them. And then she saw it. At the end of the line stood a man. Unlike the rest, he did not have his hands raised up to the goddess. Instead they were clutching a chalice as he drank from the golden vessel. The more she studied the man, the more she began to recognize him.
It was Hagoromo Otsutsuki, the father of Indra and Ashura. At least he looked like Hagoromo, but not in the way that she was used to seeing him portrayed. She was used to seeing him depicted as standing strong and tall, his wings spread out majestically as his violet eyes captured all attention in every picture she had seen him portrayed in. This Hagoromo was thinner. His muscles less developed and his body looking aged. This was a mortalized version of Hagoromo.
Sakura continued to stare at the painting, her eyes becoming vacant and the painting becoming unfocused as she processed what all of this meant. She had always known that this painting was a depiction of the creation of seraphim but never had she taken the time to truly interpret the art, nor take into account the bottom half. Her attention had always been enthralled and trapped by the depiction of the goddess. But now, as she looked at it, it was all evidence to what Tsundade had said.
She blinked and managed to move her attention from the painting to look at Tsunade in disbelief. "You mean the original seraphim were mortals?"
Tsunade nodded. "Yes, Kaguya created seraphim from mortals. Humans that were born on earth and chosen for a higher calling."
Sakura stared and then a question came to her mind. "Are...are all seraphim originally mortal?"
Tsunade gave her a charmed smile. "While I admire your innocence Sakura, I know you don't need me to tell you where babies come from. Or do we need to review that part of anatomy and physiology again?"
Sakura's face reddened, she had known it was a stupid question but she had to know for sure. "No," she shook her head. "Of course not."
"Good," Tsunade nodded.
"But," Sakura began, when Tsunade gave her a look to continue, she spoke on. "Why is this a secret? Why does no one else know about this?"
Tsunade gave her a wane smile, then began to walk slowly around the perimeter of the room. Pacing her steps slowly as she gave each painting a consideration before moving to the next. Sakura followed, her eyes casting over each painting with new regard, looking for any details she could have missed long ago.
"This knowledge was once known and taught but then a discrepancy came about." Tsunade's hand came up to skim the frame of one of the paintings. Sakura automatically looked up to see the depiction of Asura casting Indra down to the ground. "Indra had more than one offense against him when he was banished. We tell it as if he rebelled and led mortals away but that was only one of his sins. The other was because he had been caught trying to turn more mortals into seraphim, trying to create an army. Fortunately Indra did not possess the right kind of life giving chakra. But that did not stop him from stealing the chalice before he was cast down."
"And that is why that version of history is no longer taught?" Sakura asked. "Because someone might abuse the power."
They finished the circle of the room and were now standing beside the final piece of art, the one depicting Madara Uchiha. Sakura shivered at the thought of what he would have done with such knowledge. It was as Tsunade had said, if this knowledge fell into the wrong hands, it could change their world. It would change all realms.
Tsundade looked to Sakura and saw where her attention was set. "Yes," she confirmed. "The knowledge was hidden from everyone except for a select few. It was a knowledge only Asura was allowed to pass down to his successor, and from his successor there's, and so on and so forth."
"Until it came to you," Sakura concluded.
Tsunade nodded. "Although it is a knowledge that seemed worthless seeing as how we no longer possessed the cup as Indra had taken it with him. And there is no telling what knowledge Indra passed down to his successors. From what I have been able to glean from our current state of peace, it seems the knowledge may have died with Indra."
"How do you know that?"
"Because the cup showed up when Konohagakure was built. It was an ancient artifact that the Uchiha's seemed to have no knowledge of."
"They still have it?"
Tsunade shook her head. "Not anymore, but they had been the ones to keep it within their safety. When our earthen city was destroyed I took it and hid it."
Sakura nodded, then she paused mid motion. "What exactly does this all have to do with me?"
Tsunade went quiet as she looked up at the painting of Madara, his seeming omnipotent presence, towering over the burning buildings and bodies that had once been a safe haven for seraphs on the earth. When she finally looked back to Sakura, her face was grave.
"Because although all of the original seraphim have long since expired from our world, there still remains one mortal soul that has been transformed into a seraph."
Sakura's eyes widened. "Who?" she asked in a whispered breath.
Tsundae looked her directly in the eyes.
"You."
She had always wanted to know who her parents were, what they looked like, their personalities. Now that she knew they had been mortal, she found herself wondering even more. Had they been good people who earned their way back to the god tree? Or had they fallen prey to temptation and were now just a pair of tortured souls in the underworld.
Then there were her other concerns. Concerns for her own mortal self. Like what kind of relationship did she have with Seraphs before? Just how immersed and familiar to their world was she, that she ended up as one? She supposed that would be something she could now discuss with Naruto and Kakashi, now that she knew the truth. But there were still other things she felt even they would not be able to answer. There was only one person who could answer those questions. And now she was not sure if she could face him. Now knowing what she knew, and having an idea of how he felt. She was not sure she could lie to his face now.
Sakura sat crouched against a wooden trellis. The vines that crawled up its sides and over the top formed a small veil in which she hid herself. With her legs pulled snug to her chest, she hugged them tightly with her arms. Her eyes stared blankly forward as she tried her best to process everything that had been revealed to her.
Her mind had been right when it hesitated to accept Tsunade's offer for the truth. And even now, she still pondered on whether or not she wanted to know what she knew now. The fact that seraphim originated as mortals did not bother her. In fact, she found it quite inspiring that such delicate and misguided creatures could ascend to such heights. It was the fact that she had been mortal herself that bothered her. It answered why she felt she had such an understanding and connection to them but still…
It meant she had a life before this. She had been just as fragile and delicate with a mind vulnerable to the influence of seraphim. She had family and friends. Lived in a community of similar people who were just as susceptible to mistakes. She had lived this way for nearly twenty years. But when she tried to recall any of it, there was nothing there. No memory, no connection. She couldn't muster up a single thing.
It was a side effect to the transition, Tsunade had said. When a mortal is turned, their entire physic is changed but there is something delicate about the human mind that cannot endure such changes. So instead, a seal is formed upon their minds, blocking all memories from their previous lives.
Earlier:
"Anything that you experienced and did, people you knew, opportunities you had, they were all blocked. As you are the only mortal born seraph in many millennia, we did not know what to expect. When you connected so easily with Naruto and Kakashi we made a discovery, or at least developed a theory. While your memories are blocked, it seems the emotions tied to those memories were not. They still linger in your consciousness, free to come and go just like anything you have gathered in the years that you have lived as a seraph...it seems this goes for Sasuke as well."
Sakura's eyes shot up to her. "You mean…"
Tsunade nodded. "Yes, in your mortal years, you knew Sasuke."
Sakura stared at her in disbelief and then she turned to Kakashi, waiting for him to deny this. But all he did was shrug his shoulders and give a nod. She looked to Naruto who avoided her eyes.
Sakura's heart thundered against her chest, then that meant… "What kind of relationship did I have with him?"
"The extent of what you two felt for each other is only known to yourself and him. Or really, given the present case, only him. With no memories I am sure it is difficult to sort and match the floating feelings that cannot be paired to faces you do not remember."
Sakura considered all of this. Yes, it all made sense. The instinctual things and conflicting feelings, feelings that she had never felt but yet possessed. And then she thought of her dreams.
"I...I have been having dreams lately. Ever since meeting him it's like something has been triggered."
Tsunade frowned at this. "What kind of dreams?"
Sakura immediately felt her face warm. The content of those dreams were nothing that she wanted anyone else to know of. They were intimate and private moments. "Um…just flashes of moments but they are always disjointed. It was more of the feeling of...things, than seeing. It's usually dark and shadowed so I can't see anything and when I do, it's just parts of him or our surroundings."
Despite the vagueness, Sakura heard Kakashi clear his throat and immediately felt herself grow warmer with embarrassment. She looked to Tsunade and it seemed she too knew what kind of dreams she was experiencing.
"It could just be your mind manifesting and interpreting those feelings," Tsunade explained. Sakura considered this and found herself unsure of how to feel about that. She wasn't sure if she liked the idea of her mind just making such scenarios up. But at the same time, having actually done such things and not know it seemed even worse. "Or it could be that the seal is being strained. I have often considered the possibility, it's the reason why Kakashi 'tests' your resistance to his sharingan."
Sakura looked to Kakashi, her earlier embarrassment forgotten. "You mean you tried to pull my memories out?"
Kakashi nodded.
"It was never our intention to take your memories or even keep you a secret, at least at first." Tsunade said bringing Sakura's attention back to her. "You have to understand that. I didn't know it would do that to you. When Naruto and Sasuke brought you to me, you were dying. You would have died."
"Why didn't you let me die?" Sakura asked. "Why do it when you know it is forbidden? I was a stranger to you then wasn't I...or did we meet before as well?"
Tsunade shook her head. "No. The first time we ever met was when they brought you to me. As for why I did it?" She shook her head. "Right now I would not even hesitate to save you. I gave you life, I am as much a mother as any woman. It was not a traditional birth but there is a part of me in you. It is why you have my skills and powers. I love you like my own," she said, tears beginning to build up into her eyes. "But why did I do it back then...I can't say why. Perhaps it was because I never saved Dan and always regretted it. Or Maybe it was seeing the distraught look in that Uchiha's eyes," she said with a shrug before straightening. "You may not know what your feelings were, but I have no doubt that Sasuke cared for you greatly."
Silence fell within the room as Sakura considered all of this. So it was true. Sasuke had been right in thinking she was whom he had hoped. She had thought him wrong but it had been she who was wrong all this time. Her face suddenly hardened.
"Why did you not tell me any of this before?" She asked. "Why was Sasuke not told?"
Tsunade let out a heavy sigh and moved to her chair, taking a seat as her hand reached for the saki bottle hidden in a side compartment. "At the time I kept the secret as a means to keep the truth safe. But as time went on, it was to keep you safe. As for Sasuke…" Tsunade's face hardened. "His family had just slaughtered hundreds of blessed, he is Uchiha, a blood relative to Madara and Indra. The apple doesn't fall too far from the tree in that family. It was perhaps a poor decision, seeing as how things turned out, but there was no telling then. There have been hundreds of times since then that I reconsidered telling you but didn't for fear of how you would react."
Sakura herself wasn't even sure how to react. She wanted to be angry, she wanted to be furious. But she felt too drained to even feel anything. From their perspective she would have most likely done the same if it meant protecting someone she cared about. Even now she was almost wishing everything could all go back to normal, back to how things were before. Before she knew, before she met Sasuke...and yet...that life felt empty now.
"I just want you to understand," Tsunade said bringing her attention back. "That I only did what was best for you. I understand if you are hurt or feel betrayed, but...I ask that you can forgive us. And do not hold any blame against Kakashi or Naruto, they had no choice as I used my Will over them."
Sakura looked up in shock then looked to Kakashi who gave a wry smile and a shrug. Naruto gave her a sheepish smile and shrug as well. It surprised her that Tsunade would go to such an extreme. She had yet to hear of a time when Tsunade had ever used her Will. Then again, it explained how Naruto had managed to keep such a secret for so long.
The Will was a power bestowed to the rulers of each seraphim realm after the fall of Indra. The gods had done it as a means to keep seraphim from being split again and forming more factions. Passed on to the successor at death, the power acted like the influence seraphim had over mortals. Instead it was a ruler over their subjects and there was no resisting it unless a seraph had a mighty gift of mental power. Even then they did not go without suffering extreme pain. Those who did resist were usually exiled from their realm. Which in many cases meant death. It was a power not to be taken lightly nor be abused. Tsunade did not like it. It disgusted her as it took away free will. It was tyranny at its best.
"I think I need to go," Sakura said as she stared vacantly at the floor. When she looked up she could see a worried look on Tsunade's face. "I just...need to process," she added.
Tsunade nodded in understanding. "I have a meeting with the delegates from the fallen. We can talk later tonight? At home?"
Her voice sounded hopeful but worried. Sakura nodded and began to make her way towards the door. As she went, Naruto moved to follow and she raised a halting hand.
"Alone," Sakura requested. "I need to be alone...please."
A hurt expression came to his face and then Naruto looked to Tsunade. Sakura could tell she didn't like the idea of her being alone. Sakura didn't blame her, a part of her wanted to run away. But as hurt as she was, she had to understand. If not, where would she go? To the mortal realm? To Sasuke?
After a long pause, Tsunade nodded. Sakura nodded as well then began to make her way out of the throne room. But she stopped when she heard her name called out. Turning around she looked to Tsunade.
"Remember," she warned. "You cannot tell anyone any of this. The peace treaty is almost finalized, if word were to get out...it could undo everything."
.
.
.
Sakura had found herself in the gardens not long after. She said she needed to process but she had done more crying than thinking. Wiping away what she hoped was her last tears, Sakura took in a deep breath and let it out, trying to calm the sobs that still occasionally worked into her throat.
There was a rustling of leaves and she felt something brush against her shoulders. Sakura startled, sitting up and away from the wooden slats as she twisted to see what had been moving. When she noticed what it was, she blinked a few times as she stared at the white handkerchief being offered by long fingers, just slender enough to fit through the holes.
Hesitantly Sakura reached out a plucked the handkerchief from the phantoms fingers. "Th-thank you," she stuttered out, still taken aback by the gesture and the fact that she had not even heard anyone approach.
"Hn."
Sakura's heart stopped at the sound. She knew that vocabulary. There was only one person in the entire of all her existence that she knew, who seemed to think such a sound was a word. She leaned forward, her stopped heart now racing as if to make up for lost beats during her stunned state.
Peeking through the slatted wood. She could see the outline of a person and bits and pieces of his clothing but his face was hidden by a veil of greenery. Pushing aside the leaves, Sakura craned her head to try and catch a glimpse. She needed to confirm. Surely she had to be mistaken.
The movement of the leaves seemed to catch the person's attention and his dark haired head turned to face her. For a moment she froze, too shocked to believe it that it was really him.
"Sasuke?" She asked, her voice nearly breathless with disbelief.