Scarlett tear drops chapter 3: filling a void
Tick, tock, tick, tock, tick, tock,
My eyes followed the second hand as the clock on the white school wall ticked away. It had been a week since I had punctured my arm and skipped school to visit the Cullen's home, my home, my escape. Jessica and Lauren had began acting crazy when they saw me, as if talking to an imaginary friend. I didn't show it get to me, my face always hard and blank. I wouldn't give them the pleasure of letting them know how badly it hurt me to know everyone around me hated me and would be better off if I just wasn't here.
~RINGGGGGGG~
I guess I hadn't truly been paying attention because the bell ringing caused me to jump knocking my book to the floor causing a few snickers from other students. Without thinking I reached down for my book, face reddening with embarrassment. As I reached down the sleeve of my hoodie rode up enough catching on the bandaging pulling at it exposing the slashed skin beneath that looked more like ground up meat then an arm. A gasp caught me to look up into the eyes of Mike Newton and Angela who both stared at my arm in horror. Forgetting everything on my desk I ran from the room. Angela ran behind me grabbing my shoulder and pulling me into a bathroom stall.
We stood there for what seemed forever until the bell for next class rang as Angela just held herself against the door looking at me expression pained. "I'm… I'm going to be late for class" I stuttered out looking anywhere but in her eyes afraid to see the shame there. Angela was the only friend here, well human friend. That hadn't been treating me differently. Ya she had given me my space and not spoken to me much lately but she hadn't thought me crazy either. Until now at least 'Good going Nutso!' the voice in my mind said.
"Bella," was all she said heartbroken, the tears welled in my eyes threatening to fall but I sucked it back. I wouldn't cry. It's not her fault I'm a worthless piece of shit and the only way to stop some invisible black hole from sucking me dry was to grind my skin like a meat grinder!
God I really am pathetic. I looked down shaking my head no. "Bella. Look at me!" she commanded with more authority in her voice then I had ever heard before. "Bella, I understand you." She whispered. I wasn't sure what she meant. Closing my eyes, I continued to shake my head No. She placed her hands on my shoulders gently. then, a hand under my chin, lifting my head to look at her. My eyes stay closed. "Bella, look at me, please." She begged. I opened my eyes begrudgingly. I saw nothing That I expected. No pity. No disgust. No hate. Just love. And pain. I didn't understand.
The tears started to fall. Without my permission. I angrily swiped them away from my face. "I'm sorry. I'm so, so sorry." I cried. "Bella no." She cried. And before I knew it, she wrapped her arms around me, hugging me as tight as a human can. Almost to the point it felt like, Like them…. I couldn't help it then. The tears flowed. Like the Hoover Dam had just burst. "Bella, why didn't you tell me? Why didn't you come to me? I'm here for you." She cried. I could feel her, her tears in my hair. "I'm sorry." I cried again. I didn't know what else to say. How could I admit something without exposing the very secrets that drove me to the brink of insanity?
"Your not alone." She whispered. I couldn't comprehend the meaning of her words in that moment. All the pain I held all the suffering I kept in was all coming out as I sobbed loudly. Both of us falling to the floor together wrapped in her arms. The hole burst open flooding me with so much pain I wanted to scream but I had to remember where we were. "It's ok, let it out" Angela said rubbing my back as I just let go of it all. Holding onto Angela as if she was a life float and I was in the middle of the ocean drowning.
It felt like hours past but the next bell hadn't rang signaling the end of school yet so It couldn't have been that long before the sobbing stopped but the tears still flowed freely from my now burning eyes. Angela's poor Grey shirt soaked as if she had just finished riding splash mountain or something. "Can we go somewhere?" I hiccupped out, pulling back to see her reaction. She smiled kindly at me wiping away her own tears. Nodding she stood up offering me a hand.
Walking towards the office, Angela held my hand pulling me along. "Just let me speak" she said as we reached the office doors and entered to see the smiling receptionist. I kept my head down as we walked to the desk. "Bella's not feeling well miss cope, we were hoping since it's almost end of the day that I could run her home" she said sweetly. Miss cope looked at me with a sad pitiful smile. Probably thinking, poor crazy girl. "Sure hun" she answered handing Angela the sign out form. After all we were both 18. Signing us both out Angela handed the clip board back to miss cope and wished her a good day before dragging me back out of the office and to the parking lot where we found her little black Nissan waiting for us. Opening the passenger door for me she waited for me to get in. "my truck?" I asked. I couldn't just abandon my baby. "We can come back for it later don't worry it'll be fine here, besides no offense but I highly doubt anyone wants to touch the chiefs daughters beater" she added with a laugh. I smiled slightly at her. She had a point.
Getting in we pulled out of the parking lot quickly. "Where to?" she asked. I looked up at her not knowing what to say so I said the first thing that popped in my head. "The Cullen house" I answered. Angela's head snapped in my direction looking at me with shock. "trust me I'll explain on the way" I said. Hoping she would leave it at that. She just nodded and asked for the address before typing it into her GPS.
The drive began quietly before Angela broke the silence "So, spill" she said wanting to know why of all places, I wanted to go there. Especially after all the pain they had caused me. So leaving out the gash in my arm or the fact I had used dr Cullen's supplies to dr myself up. And most importantly the fact that the Cullen's were vampires, I explained how I had went there and decided to make it kind of a home away from home for myself when I needed to get away. "But what if they were to come back?" she asked. They would come back eventually but her minds timeline and mine differed exponentially.
As the drive continued we just talked about the different things I've done and places I have been. She seemed to avoid the cutting for now which I was grateful for. All to Soon we turned up to my home away from home, the place I found comfort in where I'm not judged. Where I can just be me. I got out of her car slowly and she followed . Walking up to the door Angela following. Soon enough I turned to see her mouth open wide in shock. "What?" I questioned stopping in my tracks, she gaped at the very sight of the house and the outside as well. The beautiful view you couldn't get in town. "Its Amazing" She proclaimed. "Just wait till you see inside" I said with a small laugh. Opening the glass front door I beckoned Angela to stop gaping at the house in awe and actually come and see the inside, which I knew would have her really gaping in awe and amazement.
Angela stepped in and did a 360 turning looking in every direction at the living room which I had removed all plastic from the furniture, to the balcony that held the landing for second story. To the stairway which once held hundreds of graduation caps, now missing. But the elegance and beauty of the house had her reeling as she stood in place. I felt lighthearted for the first time in months. Being somewhere we weren't supposed to be but it made it even more exciting. To the point I had forgotten why we were even here. And what Angela would eventually want to address.
Grabbing her arm I led her to the massive kitchen, my heart shivered once more with memories but I shut them away just as fast, as I opened the fridge pulling out some lunch meat, bread and all the condiments we could use. "Hungry?" I asked her. She smiled propping herself up on the bar stool at the elegant island nodding. I smiled back at her. How had I not missed her? Grabbing two cola's I threw her one opening my own and beginning my work on the sandwiches. It became silent, I didn't like silence. Silence led to questioning in which I would like to avoid. Knowing todays subject. "So are you going to prom?" I asked her. Angela shrugged nonchalant. "I don't know, Eric and I arnt as close anymore." She stated as I passed her, her sandwich. Taking a bite of mine. I actually surprised myself, I hadn't been eating lately. As if she could read my mind she looked at me with a sad smile "Its good to see you eating" she stated shyly. My cheeks burned as I swallowed my food, which went down hard as a knot formed in my stomach. I didn't want Angela seeing me differently like everyone else did. I didn't want the sad smiles and pity. I just wanted to be ok again.
"Bella you can talk to me you know" She said shyly. I nodded placing my sandwich which only had a bite out of it, back on the plate. It no longer looked appetizing as my stomach did somersaults. "Your cutting" she stated matter of factly. Not questioning, she had her evidence at school. So had Mike, God mike! "Mikes going to tell jess and then the hole school will know!" I said in horror! "I can never go back!" Angela jumped off the barstool and wrapped her arms around my petite frame which had become half her size due to malnourishment. "I'm here for you Bella, you never have to feel alone again.
Before I could answer a crash sounded from the living room causing us to jump apart. Looking at each other we both ran to investigate the sound. What I saw was Laurent standing in the Cullen's living room with a devilish smile. My face went pale. I must have looked paler then a vampire at this point. Angela looked at me with immense fear lining every feature. "So very nice to see you again, Isabella" he said with a sly smile. "I see you brought a friend" he said before crouching. We were the prey and he was definitely in hunters mode.
So….. What do yall think? Sorry to leave it at a cliffhanger but I am trying to go by what everyone asked for. What would yall like to see from here? Let me know. And sorry for taking so long to update. I have been driving medical transportation lately and its taken over my life but I absolutely love the comments I get and it definitely inspires me to write faster so comment your opinions on what you thought and what you would like to see happen in chapter 4. Later Loves. Trinity Lexi