Here's chapter 41, enjoy! :) Sorry that it's taken so long to update, i've been writing this story on wattpad aswell and totally forgot to update on here aswell. Don't worry I won't from now on. I hope everyone is enjoying it so far and thank you for the reviews they mean the world to me, keep it up guys! :)

Bella's POV

The past few days had been absolute hell. I haven't been able to sleep properly for days. Every time i did close my eyes i would have nightmares and it was very emotionally draining. The pain from the flashbacks were horrendous, they felt like i was physically going through it all over again and images flashed through before my eyes constantly. I tried to act normal around edward and the others but I could tell that they knew something was going on. Edward constantly tried to get me to talk to him but i didn't want him to worry about me anymore. I wanted to be strong and deal with this on my own but it was becoming more and more difficult as time went on. I was still healing from my injuries and that certainly wasn't helping things. Everytime i moved around, i was in absolutely agony. Every step hurt so bad and it was definitely starting to become a problem. Carlisle was keeping me well stocked up on painkillers and assured me that I would feel better in a few weeks and that i just needed to have plenty of rest which was driving me crazy. I wanted to be doing something to keep my mind off Charlie. I kinda wish that I could go back to school so that i had something to do. Don't get me wrong the Cullen's were doing everything they can to keep me occupied.

I was currently sat watching some chick flick with the girls whilst the others were out hunting. I was having fun but I always hated when Edward was away from me even if he would only be gone for a few hours, it still didn't make a difference. It was like their was a physical pain in my heart everytime he was away from me which definitely wasn't helping on top of everything else I was already feeling. I know he hated being away from me as much as I did but I still found myself counting down the hours to I see him. To be in his arms again and for him to tell me everything was going to be okay. He always made me feel complete and like I could move on but there was times where not even Edward could make the feelings go away. That's the worse times, I always felt so lost and like there was no hope in the world that things would get better. I knew that Charlie couldn't hurt me anymore but I still suffered from the remains of his abuse and I don't think I'll ever truly get over it. How do you get over something like this? I don't know the answer to that and I don't think I ever will.

I was still thinking about what Edward said a few days ago, about me talking to Jasper as he had a psychology degree and I was beginning to think that it would be a good idea to be able to talk to someone about it. I knew that I could talk to Edward anytime I wanted and that he wanted me to more than ever but I didn't want to yet. I would in the future but I just didn't know if he was the right person to talk to. I felt like if our relationship wasn't going to become complicated I needed someone that I didn't spend a lot of time with to be able to talk to. I know me and jasper are becoming closer but we will never be as close as what me and Edward are. I just hope Edward understands that I need to do this and hope he doesn't feel like I'm shutting him out. I knew this was what was best for both of us and if I had any chance of moving on with my life then I needed help.

'Bella, are you okay?' Esme asked me breaking me out of my thoughts.

'Yes, I'm fine' I told her trying to smile but failed. She looked worried but didn't say anything else about it.

'Are you hungry Bella?' She asked me. The thought of food right now didn't appeal to me at all. I just wanted to have a shower and go to sleep. I was exhausted and it certainly wasn't helping my emotions.

'No I'm okay. Is it okay if I just have a shower and lay down for a while, I'm really tired' I asked her hoping she will be okay with it. I just hoped I could sleep without any nightmares. I knew that I would most likely have a nightmare but I was too tired to care. I needed to sleep even if it would just cause me pain. Like Carlisle has told me over and over, I needed to rest otherwise it would take longer for my injuries to heal.

'Of course dear, do you need any help in the shower?' She asked me.

'No thank you, ill be fine. Could you just carry me upstairs please? I don't think I could make it up the stairs' I asked her. With my injuries, I definitely couldn't make it up the stairs at the minute.

'Of course sweetheart' she said before gently picking me up in her arms and carrying me upstairs into mine and Edwards room. She placed me on the edge of the bed and I thanked her. She turned to leave then stopped and turned back to face me. I could tell she was concerned about me just by the look in her eyes. She walked over to me and knelt in front of me.

'I know things are difficult right now but I promise things will get better, you just have to give it time and please remember I'm always here if you want to talk. I consider you my daughter now and I love you. Never forget that' she said before placing a kiss on my forehead. Her words brought tears to my eyes. The amount of kindness this family keeps showing me just keeps surprising me.

'Thank you Esme. You have all shown me nothing but love and kindness and I don't know what would of happened if i didn't have you all. I will always love my mum but I consider you to be my mum too now and i love you too' I told her truthfully. Of course my real mum would always be my mum but now Esme was like a mother to me and is just what I needed for such a long time.

'You don't have to thank me sweetheart. I know the circumstances that you came into our family were nothing but horrendous but you have brought us all together even more and the change I see in Edward since you came in his life is amazing. You've brought him to life Bella and I know he loves you very much. We all love you Bella' she told me bringing me close to her chest and holding onto to me while I cried. The tears were a mixture of sadness and happiness. I couldn't form words so I just nodded and hugged her and she seemed to know what I was trying to say. She held me until I managed to stop crying before she released me and looked me in the eyes.

'Now why don't you have a shower and get some rest and then when you wake up ill make you something to eat' She said. I nodded and she helped to me stand. She helped me to walk to the bathroom where there was fresh towels and clean pyjamas waiting for me. I smiled knowing Alice most likely put them there for me. I made a mental note to thank her later. Esme walked me to where the bathtub was and helped me sit on the side of it.

'Just shout if you need any help darling' she said before leaving the room. I let out a breathe before standing up. My legs were still quite weak and my ankle was a bit of a problem but I managed to with the support of the sink to hold me up. Alice had installed a bath seat to make showering easier which I was grateful for. There was no way I could stand up for that long in the shower. I turned the shower on to let it warm up and slowly took my clothes off. I didn't want to look in the mirror knowing how bad my body will most likely look right now but I couldn't help it. I wish I could say I was shocked but I really wasn't. Nearly my whole chest and stomach as well as most of the rest of my body was black and blue. My face was still slightly swollen. In truth, I looked like I had been hit by a train. Before I could get in the shower I had to remove my bandages that were wrapped around my front and went right around to my back. It hurt like hell but I managed it. Carlisle told me it would be okay to take it off for the shower but I wasn't allowed to get any soap in the healing cuts. Not that I would want to as that would sting like hell. Next I removed the bandage that was supporting my sprained ankle then I took off my wrist brace.

It took a while but I was finally able to climb into the shower and the water felt amazing on my skin. I could feel my muscles relax and the tension leave my body. I tried to keep my thoughts at bay and just enjoyed the feeling. I picked up my favourite shampoo which smelled like strawberries and lathered my hair before rinsing it out. I loved the smell of this shampoo, it was the same type of shampoo that my mother used to always use and it always brought back lots of good memories. How she used to wash my hair for me when I was little and would make it fun. After I finished washing my hair, I picked a washcloth up and placed a little bit of shower gel and began washing my body. It was relaxing and it was making me sleepy the more I stayed under the shower spray. Knowing that if I didn't get out soon, I would most likely fall asleep in the shower I turned the water off before wrapping myself in a towel. I sat on the side of the bath and dried my body. It was difficult as I couldn't lean over that well but I managed. After applying fresh clean bandages to my injuries, I put my underwear on before climbing into the softest pyjamas I have ever felt. I brushed my hair and put it in a ponytail before exiting the bathroom.

I could feel the tiredness consuming me now and I hardly had the energy to make it to the bed and as soon as I did, I collapsed onto the soft pillows and got under the blankets wrapping them tight around me. As soon as i got comfy, i fell to sleep straight away. I was that tired.

Edward's POV

I was starting to get increasingly worried about Bella. She was constantly having nightmares and i know she was in a lot of pain and there was nothing i could do about it but just be there for her. I've tried everything i can to get her to talk to me but she just keeps telling me that she is okay. I can tell she is hurting and i wish i knew what i could do to help her through this. How can you help someone get over something like what Bella had been through. Her dad had hurt her in the worse way possible and I can't even imagine what she is going through right now. I could tell that she was trying to be strong and not show us that she was in pain but she wasn't fooling anyone. You could see just by looking at her that she hadn't been sleeping very well and that her energy levels were really starting to become low. It was worrying me as it would only make her injuries even worse if she didn't get enough rest.

I was currently out hunting with Carlisle, Emmett and Jasper. I didn't want to leave Bella but they pretty much dragged me out with them. I did need to hunt but i hated not being with bella, it felt like i had left my heart behind with her. I couldn't wait to get home and hold her in my arms just so i know she is okay and safe. She was going to need a lot of support from all of us. The only bad thing was I don't think that having all of us was enough for her. I honestly think she needed to talk to someone about everything. I had hoped she was going to think about speaking to Jasper or someone outside of the family but I wasn't sure yet but im going to speak to her when i get back to see if she will be atleast willing to give it a try. Hopefully she would, it was something i felt she needed. I wanted her to be as happy as possible in her life and i wanted to show her that even though she has had a horrible past it doesn't have to be the same way for her future.

I had no doubt that with the right support and help she would be able to in the future move on with her life and gets what she deserves in her life. She deserved the entire world and i was going to make it my life mission to give her everything she has ever wanted and more. I wanted to see her beautiful smile atleast once everyday and I wouldn't give up on her ever. She deserved happiness and i would ensure she got that if it was the last thing i ever did. Even though we had technically only known each other for not even a year, i still loved her more than anything in the world and i knew more than anything that i wanted to spend the rest of my life with her that's why when she was healed I was going to ask her to marry me. She was my life now and i didn't want to ever spend a day away from her.

'How are you holding up, son?' Carlisle asked me coming up behind me. He placed his hand on my shoulder before sitting down on the fallen tree next to me. I looked at him and ran my hands through my hair before replying to him.

'I'm fine, it's not me im worried about. It's Bella, I don't think that shes coping very well and i just don't know how to help her.' I told him. I hoped he had some advice to help me take care of her. All I wanted was the best possible way forward for bella to make sure that she had the best possible chance of getting better as soon as possible. I know she needed time but i just couldn't stand to see her so upset and i would everything i can to make things right for her again.

'Edward, believe I hate seeing her so upset just as much as you but i'm afraid that right now there isn't much we can do apart from be there for her and make sure that she knows that she has lots of people that love her and just want what is best for her. She just needs time to heal and I have faith that she will be fine in time. Just have a little bit of patience son' He says. I have always valued Carlisle's opinion and whenever I need advice he would always be there for me. I would always be grateful for that.

'I've been thinking that maybe she should talk to someone. I've suggested before to her that maybe she could talk to Jasper with him having a psycology degree as i think he would be able to help her. She said she would think about it and i just hope that she does decide too. I think it will be beneficial to her emotional health' I told him. I hope he thinks it is a good idea.

'I think that might be a good idea. it will be good for her to have someone other than you to talk to about how she is feeling and i know jasper will do a good job. If she doesn't want to talk to Jasper then I know some pretty good counsellors that i could refer too if she wants. Just talk to her but make sure that you don't push her as it has to be her own choice' He said.

'I know, I just want what is best for her' I told him.

'I know you do as do we all' He said before standing up and leaving me to think. I would always be amazed by how caring and kind Carlisle is. He always did everything he could for his family and he liked to ensure that nothing ever happened to his family that's one of the things that i admired about him. I know that if he had anything to do with it, Bella would get the best support she could and would get through this. I trusted him with my life and if it weren't for him I would be dead right now. One thing we had in common was that my family were the world to me which now included Bella.

Thinking so much about bella made me miss her even more and I was done hunting so i got up and headed back to the one place where i belonged forever, in the presence of my angel.

Thank you for reading and sticking with this story. review please :)x