Ron Stoppable was not a happy young man.
In fact, he was so not happy that he couldn't even come up with the joking thoughts that he usually did. He could only scowl at the image of a nervous looking Wade and recall the reasons that he wasn't happy.
First, he wasn't happy about being called out on a mission just before getting to the party. It's not that he was all that interested in a party, but Michelle seemed excited about it and there would be pizza. He hadn't eaten since lunch and for a growing boy, that was too long. This was just a minor issue; there was no way that he was going to mourn his empty stomach when his friend was in danger.
He also wasn't happy to find Eric waiting for him in the aircraft. While he had made his peace, of sorts, with the construct, the false boy was still a sore spot for him. The missions with Kim were the last shred of the once unbreakable friendship they had held. Eric being here was him butting in on yet another aspect of his relationship with Kim. Again, that was something he could set aside. Any sitch that Kim couldn't handle was going to be dire and any help was going to be welcome. It was what he learned when Wade started the in-flight briefing that had him angry.
"So Kim's been going on missions alone since we got back from Japan?" Ron growled at his young friend. From his shoulder, Rufus growled his agreement.
"She insisted," Wade told him. "And she has good reason; you've seen how Yamanouchi can compel Yori to do things that she doesn't really want to. You've seen what they've done to you, with an ocean between you and them."
"Not making the connection," Ron grumbled.
"Do you know if Hana's grandparents are still alive?" Wade asked. "I mean, her maternal grandparents?"
"No, I don't know," Ron was getting more angry. "And I'm still not seeing the connection!"
"Right now you're Hana's only surviving parent," Wade explained to him. "We have irrefutable proof that you're her biological father. As long as you're alive, no international court is going to take her away from you. On the other hand, if something were to happen to you and Yamanouchi were to come up with her maternal grandparents, they could use the fact that she was born in Japan to maybe get her back."
Ron was struck speechless. Even Rufus didn't have anything to say about it.
"If that were to happen, what would Yamanouchi do with her?" Wade asked.
"Okay, I get the idea," Ron grumbled. "But why couldn't you tell me?"
"Because Kim said you'd react poorly," Wade told him. "And you have."
"I'm reacting poorly because, once again, the two of you are making decisions about me without including me!" He yelled at the boy. "Don't you think that means I'm entitled to a bit of grumpy? Motor Ed broke Shego out of prison...Shego, the psychotic super-powered bitch who has tried to kill me in the past. Don't you think you should have at least let me know about this? Now, some giant green woman broke Drakken out of prison. I made him say my name, so he's probably going to remember me. Don't you think a little warning would have been in order?"
"Global Justice didn't want to start a panic," Wade protested. "And neither did Kim or me."
"What?" Ron demanded. "You thought I was going to panic?"
"That's sort of what you're doing right now," Wade pointed out.
"Did it ever occur to you that panicking can be better than blissful ignorance?" Ron practically roared. "I would much rather be panicking about Shego and Drakken being out of prison than have them catch me by surprise at a football game!"
"Ron, yelling at each other isn't accomplishing anything," Wade tried to reason with him. "We can hash this out after you rescue Kim...and the world."
"Okay, let's have the intel," Ron grumbled.
"Right," Wade took a deep breath. "Last week, an eight-foot tall, green woman broke Drakken out of prison. Earlier this evening, he broadcast a threat of global annihilation over several nations' secure channels."
"Which you intercepted, of course," Ron quipped.
"Well...of course," Wade admitted. "Rather than a military response, Global Justice thought that it would be better to send in Kim, to figure out what was up."
"So, after this green woman broke Drakken out of a maximum security prison, you didn't take her seriously?" Ron struggled to keep his voice even.
"It's Drakken," Wade protested. "You know how he is."
"Okay, you have a point," Ron admitted. "So, this green woman overpowered Kim?"
"Apparently after overpowering Shego," Wade told him.
"Wait a minute!" Ron was on the verge of losing his temper again. "You sent in Kim, alone, after this green woman got the better of Shego?"
"I didn't realize that Shego had been present until after Kim got there," Wade explained. "It takes time to hack Drakken's systems, so I didn't have access to his security cameras."
"Okay, go on," Ron instructed him.
"I can tell you that this woman, Warmonga, has even more brute strength than Shego." Wade continued his lecture. "She claims to be an alien and from what I've observed of her physical capabilities and her technology, I believe it. I managed to hack Drakken's camera systems, after Kim went in. I'm showing you Warmonga fighting first against Shego and then against Kim."
"Okay, she's one tough customer," Ron noted, after watching the alien woman defeat first Shego and then Kim. "That strange energy she uses caught Shego by surprise. Kim was doing fine at first, then didn't take her brute strength into account." He looked at Eric. "Can you match that kind of strength?"
"No," the syntho shook his head. "I think...it was deliberate in Drakken's part; no syntho was as strong as Shego and Warmonga is clearly...stronger than she is."
Ron looked at the construct closely, then decided that staring wasn't polite. While he had never been close to Eric, something seemed off. The false boy seemed slower to respond and not as quick witted as he once was.
"Okay, I have to ask this," he addressed Eric. "Why are you allowed to come along on this one?"
"Desperation," Wade answered for him. "Global Justice couldn't come up with any other backup for you. I've been unable to find any hidden subroutines in his programming. You don't have to worry about Drakken taking control of him."
As much as Ron didn't really care for Eric, it still seemed wrong to talk about his programming that way. Of course, he really didn't know what the proper etiquette was for talking to an artificial person about such matters. Was it a personal issue? Was it just matter-of-fact? Fortunately, Wade interrupted his thinking with more practical concerns.
"So Ron, what's the plan?"
"I do what I always do," Ron answered. "I play the distraction. I go in first and act like I'm trying for a rescue. Once this Warmonga goes after me, I keep her occupied while Eric frees Kim, then Shego."
"Shego?" Both Wade and Eric asked.
"If there's one thing we can trust Shego with, it's to hold a grudge," Ron pointed out. "She was fighting Warmonga and wasn't too happy with the outcome. Warmonga beat both Kim and Shego, but not at the same time. If we can free both of them, they'll team up against her and free me up to take down the doomsday device." He paused for a moment. "There is a doomsday device, isn't there?"
"Right now, Drakken is claiming he has a machine that will deplete the Earth's atmosphere and he's threatening to use it," Wade confirmed.
"Wait a minute," Ron pointed out. "If he uses it and it works, wont that kill him, as well?"
"I don't think he's thought that threat completely through," Wade admitted. "But still, he has plenty more gizmos that Warmonga provided. Global Justice...and myself...don't know what all of them do. Right now, the idea is to see if you can eliminate the threat on your own."
"Isn't that just so nice of everyone?" Ron complained.
"Nobody knows how Drakken and Warmonga will react if the military throws a massive strike their way," Wade pointed out. "Everyone is hoping that Drakken will follow his usual way of doing things and not follow through on the threat as long as a small party goes against him. You have a short time to get Kim out of there. If there's any sign that Drakken activates any of the equipment he has in the lair, the military will throw everything they have at him."
"And we don't want to be there if that happens," Ron agreed. "I go in and distract, then Eric comes in, unexpected and frees Kim and Shego."
Rufus interrupted him.
"I haven't forgotten about you," Ron assured his friend. "You'll be even more unexpected than Eric. Get to Kim as quickly as you can. Even if I can't keep Warmonga busy long enough, by the time she deals with me and Eric, you'll have Kim free."
"I can't think of a better idea," Wade confessed.
"Neither...can I," Eric added.
Again, Ron noted that the construct seemed slow. He shook his head. This wasn't the time to worry about it. He was going to have to face an over-sized alien that was capable of overwhelming both Shego and Kim; while backed up by a slowing synthodrone and a naked mole rat. Not for the first time, he was really beginning to question his "never be normal" motto.
"..and so, if the world's governments don't bow to my absolute authority, I will take away the very oxygen you breathe."
Ron couldn't help but shake his head at that one. He approached the lair's door, which had a Shego-shaped hole in it, and looked inside. He was rather impressed with the array of technology assembled inside, although he didn't know what most of it actually did. To one side, both Shego and Kim were restrained by devices he had never seen before. Both had their hands clamped in metal sockets of some sort, while their feet were also in metal sockets, which glowed and kept the women upright and floating in the air. Between the women stood the alien, Warmonga. Nearby, Drakken was gloating his demands into a camera. Next to the camera, several screens showed various world leaders' faces, with expressions that ran from horrified to confused.
"Not a great plan," Kim pointed out.
"Silence!" Warmonga roared at her. "We do not interrupt the Great Blue when he issues his demands."
"Sure we do," Shego countered her. "Especially when we're pointing out the flaws."
"What flaws could exist in the Great Blue's plans?" Warmonga demanded.
"For one thing, he has to breathe the oxygen he's about to deplete," Kim pointed out.
"Ha!" Drakken gloated at her. "Do you think I'm a fool? I was ready for that one!" The blue man produced an oxygen tank with a mask.
"Yeah," Shego rolled her eyes. "So what's the point of ruling the world if everyone and everything is dead?"
"Okay, there's something I hadn't considered," Drakken admitted.
"Not to mention, isn't ozone oxygen?" Kim asked. "Take away the ozone layer and the sun's going to scorch the planet with radiation. You'll be trapped in this cave."
"That's another thing that seemed to have slipped my mind." Drakken now looked rather irritated.
"It does not matter," Warmonga announced. "I have personally overcome all resistance on several planets. It will be my honor to transport the Great Blue to one of these and establish him as an emperor; should he so desire."
"I've become rather fond of dear old Earth," Drakken told her. "There must be something else here I can make use of." He pulled up a smart phone. "Let's see...atmospheric depletion is now off the table. Worldwide bowel disruption...no, that doesn't seem very pleasant. Carbon conversion...not a good idea. I've got it, oceanic seismic disruption! I'll cause tsunamis to inundate all coastal areas! Wait a minute; just what's our current altitude."
"Probably high enough," Ron informed him. "But I'd prefer go immediately back to jail."
"Wha...?" The blue man seemed confused. "It's the buffoon who's name I will not mention, using a Kim Possible entrance."
"Y'know, you're right," Ron found himself musing. "That is sort of a Kim line."
"No matter," Drakken gloated. "My new associate, Warmonga, defeated both Shego and Kim Possible. You don't have a chance! Warmonga, be a dear and add this fool to my collection of prisoners."
It was tempting. He had an open route to flee, so he was tempted to just turn and run, let Warmonga chase him away from Drakken so that Eric and Rufus would have a clear shot to free Shego and Kim. The only problem was that he couldn't bring himself to fully trust the synthodrone and didn't want him around a helpless Kim...even though he had been living in the Possible home for months. Instead of running away, he dodged the oncoming alien...being more than a little disturbed by how much her impact on the floor where he had been standing shook the ground, and sprinted towards the odd machine that Drakken was working on.
"Ah, that's his plan!" Drakken crowed. "He's trying to destroy the doomsday devices!" Drakken placed himself between Ron and the gizmo he had been working on. "You'll never get past me before Warmonga catches you!"
Ron did his best to put a shocked and disappointed expression on his face to make Drakken think that he had figured out the plan. Broken field running served the teen well; Warmonga was shooting some sort of beams at him but he was running in an unpredictable, zigzag course. Purple energy splattered off of the floor several time as he closed in on the blue villain. Instead of fighting him, Ron jumped over the blue man and landed on the gizmo he had been bragging about a moment before. He paused a second before jumping off, narrowly avoiding the burst of energy that hit where he had been perched.
"Gaah!" Drakken shrieked, having narrowly avoided the blast, himself. "Be careful! Planet-destroying machinery can be delicate!"
Ron hit a forward handspring and landed in front of another machine. Again, he paused, looking at the angry Warmonga, before dodging another burst, which caused this machine to belch sparks and smoke.
"He's goading you into shooting the machinery!" Drakken snapped.
"I can see that!" Warmonga snarled back at him, clearly frustrated. The hulking alien took a different grip on her staff, holding it like a fighting staff rather than a rifle and sprinted towards the teen. Ron had a moment of dismay, seeing Eric drop in through an air vent and head immediately towards one of the machines.
"Ahh, so that's your plan!" Drakken shouted, as Warmonga closed in on Ron. "You're playing the distraction while my traitorous creation destroys the machinery! Well, it won't work!" The villain picked up some sort of staff of his own, one that crackled with yellow energy, and took off after the synthodrone. Eric retreated from his creator but Ron spotted Rufus scampering in through the front door.
Brilliant! A two-stage distraction! With Eric distracting Drakken, all he had to do was keep Warmonga occupied. Of course, that wasn't exactly easy or pleasant. The hulking woman was quicker than her size would suggest. Still, she was handicapped by the breakable machinery that surrounded them. He ducked her first swing, which wound up smashing a blocky-looking gizmo. She growled in greater frustration and swung again, this time gouging the wall. Considering the damage she was doing to the infrastructure, Ron didn't care to think about what would happen if she hit him, but took a little comfort in the fact that she started to pull her punches a little bit.
Another swing and another thrust; two more dodges. He was wondering what was taking Rufus, so he did a tuck-and-roll to put Warmonga between him and the captive women and allow him to look their way without raising Warmonga's suspicions. Rufus was on Kim's shoulder; the redhead held up her constrained hands, then tapped her waist, then gestured towards Warmonga. Ron got the hint and spotted the control on his opponent's waist that would probably release Kim and Shego. This was going to be tricky.
Warmonga glared between him and Kim, probably suspecting some sort of communication but shrugged it off and thrust with her staff again. This time, he avoided it by dropping into a low squat and when she came on, intending on kicking him, he sprang up, performing a back-flip while extending one leg, landing a powerful shot to her chin. It felt like kicking a thick branch and could have seriously harmed a person. Warmonga was staggered, allowing him to scissor her legs and drop her on her face. Before she could recover, he ripped the control from her waist and tossed it towards Kim and Rufus.
Warmonga was no fool; she saw what happened and realized what was happening. She surged to her feet, taking a breath. Ron didn't know if she was about to roar in rage or warn Drakken; he didn't wait to find out. It was time to take his distraction game to a new level.
He pinched her butt.
He had a moment to wonder if this gesture held the same meaning in her culture, before her roar of outraged anger echoed through the lair and she surged to her feet.
Okay, she was both angry and totally fixated on him, just what he had intended. So why, when he dodged yet another strike that dug a deep furrow in the floor, did he have second thoughts about his plan?
"I will not submit to such an affront by a creature such as you!" The green monster roared. She twisted her staff, making it hum with power.
Ron had no idea what that hum meant, but he knew it couldn't be anything good. That theory was proved correct when a blast of purple energy flew his way. He managed to avoid it, noting that his hair stood on end in doing so. She swept her staff towards him and he vaulted over the beam. Drakken shouted in despair as the energy scorched the wall behind the teen. When she swung the beam back his way, he dove under it and tumbled towards her and managed to come out of his roll by kicking her knee.
Warmonga dropped, almost on top of him. He couldn't move fast enough; her huge hand closed around his ankle with terrifying strength. He tried to twist out of her grip but she was far too strong. She heaved herself to her feet and held him up, pulling back her other arm to swing her staff again. He had a bare moment to mentally thank Coach Roughman for all of the sit-ups when he was able to perform one and leave the staff to sweep by underneath him. Warmonga growled and prepared another swing, only for a blast of green energy to send her staggering.
"Oh yeah?" Shego, now free, snarled. "I'm more than ready for round two!"
Another blast from the smaller green woman struck the larger green woman, and Ron could only be thankful that Warmonga hadn't thought to use him as a shield. Instead, the alien hurled him across the room. He saw stars when he struck the wall, but he tried to get to his feet.
"Stoppable-San!" A voice he had hoped to never hear again sounded next to him. He couldn't help himself; he looked to see Sensei's sending image observing him.
"Can't you see I'm busy?" He snarled at the old man, staggering from the blow he had taken.
"The greatest trial is upon you," the old man told him, his voice impassive. "The fate of your friend, and of the world itself is in the balance. Accept the Mystical Monkey Power in its entirety and defeat this foe."
"Are you serious?" Ron could only growl back. "What's the catch? Will I get mutated any more? Will you trick me into fathering another child? Will you send me off to fight some other freaks? I think I can do this without your help!"
Still somewhat winded, he staggered towards where Shego and Kim were fighting against the hulking alien.
"You are all mere insects to me!" Warmonga roared at them. "I will not let you stand in the way of my duty and destiny!"
The very air moaned when she swung her staff. Both Shego and Kim managed to avoid the blows, but they couldn't get close enough to do any damage. When Shego fired her plasma, Warmonga caught the burst on her staff, deflecting it to destroy yet another of the machines.
"Will the lot of you stop that?" Drakken paused in his pursuit of Eric to complain. "Much more of this and I'll have nothing to threaten the world's governments with!"
That seemed to light an idea in Warmonga.
"Very well," she declared. "If those unworthy of your rule will not submit when threatened with annihilation, then they shall learn that it's no idle threat!" She rumbled to one of the undamaged machines and punched a large button. "Once this machine charges, it will cancel this planet's magnetic field, allowing what you primitives call solar wind to strip most of the atmosphere away. Had the lot of you simply submitted to the Great Blue's rule, he would have demanded a tribute less than current military spending from your governments. You would have had peace and prosperity under his dictatorship! However, due to the resistance and insults you have shown me, you will face your doom!"
Warmonga took up a position in front of the machine, her posture daring any and all to try to get past her.
"Okay, that's not happening," Shego quipped, then charged the alien, firing short bursts of her plaza to try to keep her off balance. By the time the former heroine reached the alien, the machine had started to hum. Instead of continuing the plaza barrage, Shego kept her hands glowing while she fought the massive alien. Ron was still recovering from the hard shot, so Kim got to the scrum next, trying to slip by the melee and get to the machine. Unfortunately, Warmonga wasn't a fool.
The alien slipped a kick past Shego's defense, sending the villain sprawling back, then swatted the redhead away from the machine. Ron managed to tumble past Drakken's new enforcer, but he only got a short look at the controls before Warmonga, not allowing herself to be distracted from her goal, grabbed him by the ankle and hurled him away from the machine.
He did his best to tuck-and-roll, realizing that he plowed over Shego first and then Kim before slamming into another wall. Stunned again, he could barely look back to see the hulking alien stalking his way, first encountering Shego.
"Your mastery of certain energies is somewhat intriguing," she announced, hooking one foot under the dazed mercenary and lofting her out of the way. "And you once served the Great Blue. For both of these reasons, I will spare your life." She looked at Kim then at him. "The two of you put up a greater fight than most, despite your small size. You are fit for my trophy wall."
Ron was too dazed to move, to dazed to even call out a denial or beg for mercy as Warmonga stalked up to Kim, charged her staff, and thrust down towards the redhead.
But then, suddenly, Eric was there. The synthodrone threw himself between Kim and her attacker. The staff cut through his arms as if they weren't there and buried itself in this chest. Maybe it was the staff, or maybe it was how synthodrones died, Ron had no idea. What happened was burned into his memory. Eric's scream of pain faded quickly, like a deflated balloon. The handsome, youthful face looked like it aged to an old man in a matter of moments. Fluid poured out of his wound to sizzle and hiss on the staff until, completely empty, the shell that had been Kim's dream simply came apart and disintegrated.
Kim managed to scream; a piercing wail of terror, denial and loss. Warmonga smirked in triumph, twirled her staff to scatter what bits of Eric remained on it, and turned her attention back to the redhead. Ron had only one choice.
"Okay Sensei," he managed to gasp. "Let me go full Monkey."
He didn't even have to complete the request; strength flooded into him, sweeping the pain and exhaustion away. Somehow, he knew that Sensei had nothing to do with it; it was him accepting the Mystical Monkey Power and being prepared to be the champion for his world. His shout wasn't a scream of denial or fear, it was a challenging roar. Warmonga looked away from Kim and at him, her eyes widening.
Even as the world took on a blue tint, he could see everything much more clearly and more senses flooded his brain; he could hear Drakken's babbling of disbelief, he could smell Kim's grief and Warmonga's sudden uncertainty. Power flooded into his limbs; he rolled over onto his hands and feet; like a monkey.
"You want to destroy this world?" He roared at the alien. "You're going to have to deal with me first, and that just got a whole lot rougher! Let's do this!"
His legs launched him at his quarry, a distance he could have never covered in one jump before, but one that he knew was well within his range now. He had a moment to savor Warmonga's widdened eyes and shocked expression.
The impact was oh so satisfying.
A/N: As always, big thanks go out to Joe Stoppinghem for beta reading.