"And that one goes to Chuckles! Who had their money on the baldy elf? No, not you, I have you down for Trixy," Varric called as he shuffled through the crowd.

"Excuse me!" I called, pushing myself up to my feet and marching to the edge of the ring. "I had him fair and square! If it were a real fight I would have won." I argued.

"I merely took advantage of your lapse in concentration." Solas said, his breathing still heavy as he wiped the sweat from his neck with a rag. I marched back to him with a pointed finger.

"You cheated, more like."

"You hesitated."

I guffawed and turned back to Varric for assistance but he was too busy raking in his coin.

"Best out of three. Come on, I know your game now," I said picking up my rod again. He smiled at me gently but shook his head.

"Perhaps another time," he said, "Thank you for the match, you are a worthy opponent."

I loosened my grip on the rod and tried to seem relaxed, "Yes, well. Anytime." I stuttered.

To say the wind had been knocked from my sails was an understatement. He smiled once more and turned towards the armoury, the small rag in his hand coming up to wipe the back of his neck as he walked.

I hesitated in the ring as the crowd disbanded around me. I looked to Varric who simply shrugged and shook his head, his disappointment almost on a par with mine. But what had I expected? I suppose I quite fancied the idea of a sparring match leading to some sort of tryst on the castle walls. At least that's what happened in one of Varric's stories. But no, once again he had walked away. Perhaps he had decided that this was all getting too much like hard work, because it certainly was for me. I just wanted it to be simple but the longer this went on the more complicated things seemed to get.

I had feelings for him. Deep frightening feelings that I couldn't just sweep under the rug. I thought he had felt the same. When I looked back to the court yard he was no longer there and I was left feeling foolish and lost. I took a step to go and look for him but I stopped. I had chased him this far and he'd barely even shown his hand other than that kiss.

Dreams. That was all it was. A foolish dalliance he had with me in the fade. What was it he said? Things always came easier to him there. Perhaps in reality he thought it would be too much... or not enough.

Stop it Nev. I hastily through aside the rod and picked up the nearest practice bow. It was wooden and poorly made, but not the worst I'd wielded. I picked up a quiver and notched an arrow to my bow and before I could even stop myself I let it fly. Muscle memory propelling it forward to the centre of the target.

To my left Varric let out a long whistle.

"Remind me never to get on your bad side."

I smiled weakly. There was nothing more I could say to Solas. I knew that.

"Hey," Varric ducked under the fence of the ring and gently pat my arm, "Don't let this get to you. Sure, it might seem disappointing now but maybe this is for the best."

I scoffed and notched another arrow to my bow. "Kinder in the long run." I let it fly. Another perfect shot.

I looked down at a very worried looking Varric.

"I'll try not to let it get to me," I reassured him and he nodded, satisfied. He worried a lot for a dwarf that was supposedly so apathetic. "Besides," I continued, "What's the use in being upset over something I never had to begin with?"

"You opened yourself up to the possibility of being vulnerable and he let you down. It happens to the best of us." He had a wistful look in his eye.

"I'm tired of chasing him," I said.

"Good."

"I'm tired of waiting on him."

"Even better."

I hesitated before I set my bow to the side and levelled Varric with a look, "This is it then. I'm finished. I'm not going to pine anymore like some child. I'm not going to keep myself awake at night wondering if he thinks I'm worth it. It's over before it could even start."

Varric smiled and ducked back under the gate, "Glad to see you're coming to your senses. Now if you'll excuse me, there's an ale with my name on it in the tavern. Maybe come and sit with me later, we can celebrate your getting over Chuckles."

I smiled, "I'll see you there."

He said nothing more before he sauntered off to the tavern and I was left alone in the training ring. My shoulders sank and a lump formed in my throat. I knew that every word I had said was a lie.

Yes, I was tired of waiting on him and yes, I was tired of chasing him. But I wasn't ready to stop. I couldn't force myself to fall out of love with him just like that. Yes, Love. I was calling it what it was. I loved him. Deeply and inescapably. He had dug himself into my heart like a thorn that wouldn't be removed and yet it felt like he had always been there. I felt a connection to him that I couldn't shift. Forgive the cliche, but it felt as though I'd known him my whole life.

I kicked the ground, frustrated by my own foolishness. I suppose that's what happens when you love someone, isn't it? Things you once thought foolish become the pillars of knowledge. The world flips. You lose yourself and find yourself all at once. The person you once were seems hollow compared to what you are when you're with them.

I shook my head and tried desperately not to cry. Picking up my bow again I decided that practising might distract me. That If I fired enough arrows that my feelings would somehow fly with them. Arrow after arrow, they thudded into the target. With each release I waited for relief. Release and thud, release and thud. When my hand reached to my shoulder to find now arrows left I let out a growl and through the bow and quiver to the ground, instead reaching for the dagger on my thigh. I pelted it at the target and it dug in deep. But still nothing I did would alleviate these feelings. I needed rid of the disappointment, of the adoration and the blasted hope that he might still feel something for me. Creators, the hoping was the worst.

In one last ditch attempt I shot my hand towards the target and let the magic crash into it like waves on rock. It exploded, or rather... imploded. In a second it shifted into itself and vanished, swallowed up by the same green light that a rift would have. And then it was gone.

I was still standing as I had, shaking with the power that I had just released. It was the only thing that would take away from my heartbreak. It was like I had let out a scream that I had held in all my life. Primal,satisfying... terrifying. I watched the yellow grass blow about in the breeze where the target once sat.

It had vanished. It wasn't just blown apart, it hadn't just burnt down to nothing. In that moment, the second my magic touched it, it ceased to be. I didn't know much about powerful magic, but I knew that was it. I looked down at my hand and shuddered. I wiped it on my over coat and scanned the area. If anyone saw that then there would consequences. I climbed out of the ring and scampered back to my quarters. My head was a rush with too many things in that moment, I needed to hide.

I shut the door firmly behind me and locked it tight. I stood there for a minute, trying to stop my head from swimming but to no avail. I loved Solas. Did Solas love me? Was there any point in continuing a relationship at this late stage? Had I just opened the veil?

The last thought propelled me forward into pacing my room. If I had torn the veil, a rift would have formed. There was no rift, was there? I checked out my window. No sign of alarm. I continued my pacing.

"Mythal, if you're there I am in dire need of your help."

Silence. I couldn't even feel her presence.

I scoffed and shook my head, "Some grandmother you are."

Still nothing.

"Alright," I said to myself, "Let's try this again."

I grabbed my ink well from my writing desk and set it in the middle of the floor. I paced around it twice, trying to get the best angle to do this... whatever this was. I didn't know what I was doing really, I couldn't even remember how I'd done it to the target in the first place. There was a lot of feelings going on. I knew that much. Frustration, heartbreak, Solas, but I didn't know what had triggered it. With a deep breath I tried to summon all the thoughts that had been in my head and through out my hand like I'd done before.
Unfortunately, all that happened was a pathetic puff of flame that I had to stamp out with my foot. I sighed and tried again. Still nothing. Just a small patch of ice that melted within moments. I shook my head and tried from another point in my room. Further away, closer, from standing on the bed to kneeling on the floor. All I'd managed to achieve was to burn a patch in my floor.

"Come on Nev," I said, wiggling my fingers and trying it one last time. When all that came out was a bolt of lightning I growled and flopped back onto my bed. In all honesty, I didn't even know if I wanted to do it for a second time. I didn't know what I was messing with. On one hand, it could be innocent enough, no more than a party trick. On the other, I could be tearing multiple holes in the veil. But something in my gut was telling me that I needed to figure this out. I needed to learn this magic.

I sat up once more and breathed deeply, focusing on the inkwell that now sat toppled in the middle of the floor. When I vanished the target, I had been feeling so many things it was hard to remember what might have triggered the magic. I shut my eyes and tried to recall the moment. I'd through my dagger and nothing. I through out my hand and... the scream. It was like emptying my soul of everything that weighed it down. I stood from the bed and rolled my shoulders. That's what I had to focus on. I shut my eyes and let all those feelings build up in my chest once more and within seconds I felt a lump in my throat. I craved that relief again. I opened my eyes and let the war going on in my head rise to a crescendo and then in one fluid movement I shot out my hand and propelled that scream forward.

The ink pot vanished.

Like the target had done before it, it twisted around itself and disappeared into the green light. The only thing that remained were the distant whispers of the fade.

I stumbled back in shock, my hand coming up to cover my mouth. This was so unknown, so dangerously new. It frightened me and yet... the power, it seemed eerily familiar. Once again I felt myself giving way to something deep within me and I knew then that I was slowly becoming the person who I was always meant to be.

"This was the gift that made you so precious, dhalen." I looked to to door and there she stood. Her face more sombre than usual. "I hadn't expected you to remember it so soon."

"What is it?" I asked urgently.

Mythal sighed and looked back to the empty space on the floor. "I cannot tell you everything for you will not understand, but I will divulge this much. You have always shown a remarkable talent for manipulating the world around you. Before The Fall, you could to turn rain to shine, calm seas to a raging storm. You could astonish my court with your tricks that were child's play to you but genius to your audience."

"What does this mean, Mythal..." I was unsure I wanted the answer to that question. She seemed unsure to give it.

"The magic you possess is quite unique. In this world your power is halved. The veil restricts you as it did to all of us, but that does not mean you cannot use it. You can bend the veil, manipulate it. Deep within your mind you remember what it was like before it existed. It is not unlike your Herald's mark. You're connection to the fade is strong."

"Before it existed?" I stood and began to pace. This was too much. My mind began to run in circles again, swimming so as to make me dizzy. Before what existed? The Veil? Why does it exist now? Who put it there? Why me?

That question rang out above the rest. Why me? How did this all come down to me? Why did I have this power? Why was it my destiny to lead the people?

"Because there is no one else who could, dhalen." She stood in front of me now, her form so real and solid that I could almost feel her hand on my cheek. "You're time will come and when it does you will be ready. In the mean time hone your power. Learn to use it despite the chains that have been put there. You will need it."

"I'm frightened... Mythal. I... It's like I can almost remember but there's something stopping it. Like trying to see shadows in the dark."

She stroked a strand of hair behind my ear. "Do not fear it. Embrace it. Be who you were meant to be, Nevalla."

"Who am I meant to be." I blinked before I could stop the tear rolling down my cheek.

Mythal withdrew her hand and gave me that curl of her lip that oozed so much arrogance it was almost comforting.

"My Granddaughter."