- Pluck -
Part II
Chapter 20: Unfeeling and Selfish
Companion song: Redwood Colonnade by Lifeformed
"Don't scare me like that!"
Karin was tired. That, of course, was no surprise. It came with the job. She was used to it, normally. It didn't affect her nearly as much. But the past few weeks have been nothing but hell for her, and she hasn't gotten a single break.
It was just after eleven at night, and she was still at the Guard. Only the ones on night duty were still around. She really ought to be in bed at home. She really ought to be getting at least some sleep in before her early morning wake-up.
But the past few weeks have also taught her that the people around her could come and leave at any moment, and Juugo had given her a rather massive scare earlier.
"I wasn't trying to." Sat atop a rather small medical bed, the giant man looked even more ginormous. Bandaged and a bit roughed up, he didn't look anything like the mean beast he was capable of being. Instead, he looked like a simple man who was looking at her with a bit of amusement. "I lost control. You weren't even there. I don't know how it happened."
He had been out for nearly three days after the incident. It was always like that, and it was also the main reason the Guard didn't send him out on as many missions they'd like to if he had complete control over his ferocity and strength.
And that was a task that was put on her shoulders, a task she has barely been able to work on due to the recent onslaught of work. Most of which was pushed onto her because of one Sasuke Uchiha.
Bastard, she hissed to herself. I swear, if he weren't so good looking, I'd -
"Karin?"
Her head snapped to Juugo. "Yes? What?"
"Did you find out who it was?"
Oh, right.
"No," she said with a heavy sigh, "but whoever it was, they sure had something to be pissed about."
His smile sunk, but still managed to lay on his lips. "Because of Suigetsu, right? He -"
"He lived."
A long, heavy exhale escaped him, and he looked like he was about to collapse.
"What?"
"His Highness saved him," she said, taking Juugo's massive arm, patting it. "He survived. He's in a coma, but . . . ."
Karin trailed off, but he still grinned.
"Sasuke knows?"
"Yes."
"Good." Juugo fell back on the bed, staring at the ceiling, looking almost breathless. "That fixes one thing, at least."
She smiled and blew out the candle on the table beside him. "Get some rest, Juugo. We still need you out there."
...
When she left, she stretched her arms over her head, cracking them awake.
Finally. Time to go home.
"Ah. There you are!"
But just as she got to the main lobby of the Guard, there was a loud thud, and she turned and found -
"Holy shit!"
Kankuro, covered in sweat and grime, and at his feet was the bleeding corpse of Kisame.
"This is a delivery for you, I'm guessing."
So much for sleeping.
It was fine, for a while.
They were in the hallways of the Guard, reminiscing as they followed the halls they knew as well as their own name. They went to see Sakura's office, which was left exactly how it had been ten months ago, when she left. They went to the cafe and ate food there, and Naruto's tastebuds were thrilled at the familiar taste returning to his mouth. He used to eat there almost daily. He used to slip out of his shining office to fly down to the busy, bustling cafeteria to eat with Sasuke and Sakura when they had time off for lunch. This used to be his life, his sanctuary, his second home.
And for a while, it was fine.
"Come with me."
But then Sakura's hand took his, gripping it too tightly, and he glanced at her from underneath the hood that shielded his face from the rest of the realm. Naruto Uzumaki was not a mind-reader, especially when it came to women. He usually got the shorter end of the stick when it came to reading between the lines and picking up on silent, often hidden cues.
But this . . .
This, he saw. He understood. He nearly drowned in it.
This was not fine.
Because Sakura never held his hand like that - not unless something was wrong, or she was scared. And Sakura never sounded like that: small, nervous, shaky. That sort of noise coming from her sounded off. Weird. And it made his heart jutter against his ribcage, creating a painful, wary song that made him all too keenly aware of that thing he didn't want to think about.
That woman who fits such a small, nervous, shaky voice.
And that was when he noticed where they were. In front of a metal cell door, somewhere deep within the captive wing of the Guard. She didn't have to say anything, because he already knew. Ino was behind that door. She was taking him to Ino. She knew.
"Sakura."
Her left hand stayed latched to his as he tried to gently pull away. Her right hand pulled a key from her belt and turned it in the door's lock.
It clicked, and Naruto's heart stopped.
"We should go," she whispered.
She took a step forward, but he stayed put, heaving. "I don't want to."
Her eyes never looked at him. Not once.
"Won't you?"
"No." He yanked at her hand, which still refused to release him. "No! I'm not going in."
Her free hand grabbed the handle and thrusted it down, allowing the heavy door to be pulled their way. Cold air hit their faces. It was so fucking freezing, and Naruto had never been more scared in his entire life. More so than when Sasuke had left on his first Guard mission and hadn't come back for two months, or when Sakura had first been announced ill. It was like he was a small child all over again, coaxed to enter the shadows under his bed. Shadows that held horrible monsters and beasts, because that was the only way darkness could exist in Sun 1.
But this wasn't Sun 1, and inside that cell wasn't a monster.
Not in the technical term, at least.
"Talk to her," Sakura begged, frigid fingers hooking around his hand to persuade him to follow her inside. "Just - please - talk to her, Naruto."
He didn't want to. He didn't want to hear what she had to say. He was perfectly fine with never speaking to her ever again. But Sakura was desperate. Begging, even. Her face was pale, as if she were sick again, and the blossoms in her hair were closing up and wilting. He was hurting her every second he did not step into that room, and Naruto - he was not a perfect man. He's made millions of mistakes. He will make a million more mistakes.
But he didn't want to hurt Sakura.
Never.
So, despite every bone and muscle and nerve in his body begging otherwise, he followed her into that dark cell of winter, where monsters roamed and he trembled like a lost kid.
...
"I'm sure you've begun to suspect it by now."
Ino's first sentence to him since she had been thrown into that nasty cell made him realize there was no way he was getting out of here without something happening, something changing.
But when push came to shove, Naruto was always the kind to bulldoze to the very end.
"I'm not angry," he said, smiling. He's heard stories about him where, when he was the angriest, he was smiling. He could be facing the cruelest of criminals or be fighting for that bill that the court seems to absolutely love holding over his head, and the people would tell stories of how, no matter what, he was always grinning. He hoped this was not one of those smiles. Gods, he hoped. "I think I know what happened, but I'm not angry. Really."
Sakura, swathed in a green gown with a pink, silk shawl there to keep her arms warm, looked colorless in that cell. Empty. He hated seeing her like that. He hated this cell. He hated being there.
"Do you really?" she asked, stepping next to him, placing a small hand on his right shoulder. "Naruto, you were engaged to -"
"Don't!" He snapped away from her, smile turning into a twisted, scared grin. "I - I know. I know it all. I know I was engaged to her, and I know Ino messed with my head and made me propose to you. I know." He looked back at Ino, who stayed on her ratty futon, small and staring. She pitied him. It was so obvious. It made his organs squeeze. "But I don't care."
"Don't care?" Sakura repeated, voice pitched. "How can you - Naruto. These are your memories we're talking about. Your real memories. Without them, you - you're not even -"
"What?" he asked. "Not me? Can I really not be me without all these memories I don't even want back?" Her eyes were wide and glassy as tears spilled down her face. Panicking, Naruto took her chin in his left hand and wiped her cheeks with his right. "I'm happy, Sakura. I'm happy being with you. I love you."
She shook her head. "It's not real, Naruto. None of this is real!"
That sent a poisoned dagger straight into his chest.
How can she . . . .
Pulling his hands from her face, Naruto finally threw his grin off to the side and frowned. He didn't have the energy anymore. "Not real?" he nearly hissed. Nearly. He didn't want to scare her, to make her feel like he was angry at her. Because, sure, he was damn pissed now, but not at her. Not because of her. "You don't think these past eight months have been real? You don't think the help we've given one another is real?" He grabbed her hands and placed them on his chest. This time, she tried to move away, and he did not release her. "You don't think this heart in my chest, beating for you, is real? How can . . . you even begin to think that?"
Her nails sunk into his royal robes. "Stop," she whispered, "don't make this any harder."
He didn't listen. He wouldn't. He only leaned in and wrapped his arms around her, pressing his cheek against her wilting hair, hoping the sunlight from his skin would help them bloom again.
"I love you," he said. "I love you so much. Don't take this away from me. Don't make me remember."
Sakura leaned into him and sobbed into his robes, staining them. She hugged him tightly, not releasing him for what seemed like hours, and Naruto never wanted it to stop. But it did. It always did.
She pulled away, turned to Ino, and said, "Do it."
"What?" Arms snapping away from her, he took a step back. "No. Wait. I -"
"Karin's not here," Ino said, glancing down at her cuffs.
Sakura whisked over, fell onto her knees, and pulled another key from her belt. A small one that could not fit into the massive locks on the cell doors. She slid it into the lock in the cuffs, and they fell into Ino's lap.
"H-How -"
"Do it quick." Sakura's voice was raw and strained. "Please."
As Ino leaned against the wall and tried to stand, Naruto was staring at Sakura.
"I don't want this!" he yelled, backing into the door. When he tried it, it would not budge, and he felt like he was about to collapse. "Unlock the door, Sakura. I don't want to remember! I don't love her!"
But Sakura only stayed in the shadowy back of the cell, watching with hollow eyes. "Her name is Hinata," she whispered, "and yes. You do."
He didn't know what to do. He was stuck, like an animal in a cage. And he wasn't afraid to act like one, to fight to get out of there, to try his hardest to get out of there before his mind was messed with again.
But Ino's eyes were already navy. She already had him under her spell, keeping him from fleeing.
Because, suddenly, he did not want to.
But I -
She was right. They both were. This was the right thing to do.
But Sakura -
He stared at those green eyes as cool hands pressed against his temple. They were glowing, almost. Like an animal.
Like a monster.
...
"N-Naruto . . ."
That was Hinata. She was small and young, fingers poking together and cheeks red. He didn't know where he was or what was happening - nor did he care. Because he felt everything. The flutter in his chest as he looked at her cute face, at the way her wide eyes looked up at him with admiration. He felt pride erupt in his chest, because that was the first time she did not call him 'Sun Prince' without having to be reminded by him that 'Naruto, just Naruto' was fine. It took two years. She was so shy, and even now, after they've known each other for that long, she still sometimes struggled to look him in the eye.
But she was doing it now.
And he -
He . . .
...
"No matter what, I'll be by your side."
That was right.
She always was.
Being a Sun Prince was not easy. You had rules to follow, responsibilities to keep. The weight of the entirety of Sun would soon be on your shoulders, and just knowing that hundreds of thousands of people's lives relied on you -
It was scary.
Naruto Uzumaki, sometimes, didn't think he was up for it. He wasn't overwhelmingly smart like Shikamaru, or strategic like Toneri, or careful and calm like Gaara. He was just Naruto. He was loud and liked to kick some sense into his friends when they were going down the wrong path, but that was it. He couldn't kick all of Sun.
"But you're also fiercely loyal and determined to stick to your morals. You don't need to be a genius to know how to get things done. You don't need to be perfect at strategy to get people to listen to you. You don't need to be careful or calm, because a king who is passionate and who says what he thinks is exactly what Sun needs right now, Naruto."
But when he was the one going down the wrong path, Hinata was always there.
So, maybe, together, they could kick Sun in the right direction.
...
"T-T-Together?"
Yes, together.
Because that's what he wanted, what Naruto always wanted. To be together.
With her.
With Hinata.
And she wanted the same thing, right?
. . . R . . . Right?
"R-Really?"
Yes, really!
Because she was his universe, the thing that made him glow as brightly as the very sun he rose in the mornings. She made him happy and smile and laugh and feel like he could lift the entire palace on his shoulders. She believed in him and stayed next to him and always, always pulled him out of the dark, monster-filled shadows under his bed.
She was a hero. His hero.
And he . . .
...
"Naruto, breathe."
He loved her.
He loved her so much. He's loved her since he first met her, when she was trying to catch falling stars with her sister in Moon 2. He loved her when she was on the other side of the universe, basking in the moonlight, waiting on the horizon for the sun, for him, to come.
He loved her so much it hurt. His heart would stop when she smiled. His knees would give out if she laughed. His lungs would collapse if she -
"You're . . . proposing."
That was Hinata Hyuuga. The woman he loved. The woman he wanted to be with forever. The woman who made the day bright and the night even brighter.
Hinata Hyuuga.
Hinata.
His Hinata.
...
"I love you."
When he could finally breathe again, those words danced along his first exhale.
He was back in the room. In the cell.
And he remembered everything. He remembered her.
"Hi . . . nata . . . ."
...
Where?
It felt like he hadn't seen her in eight months.
He knew that was wrong. He knew he saw her just a few days ago.
But there was a gaping hole in his chest that made him feel empty and alone, and he really - really -
Where?
Every wall and door and brick looked the same.
Where!?
But just when he felt like he was about to bleed out, he found her.
Standing. Breathing. Alive.
Of course she was alive.
But he -
"Hinata!"
He hadn't been alive, it felt like. For months, he felt like he was a corpse walking around.
"I'm so sorry."
Like he wasn't in control. Like he was being pulled around by strings. Like things were being shoved into his head.
"I'm sorry I forgot."
It wasn't him. It never was, in those eight months.
It made him sick. It made his stomach roll. It made his entire body freeze up.
But -
"I'm so sorry, Hinata."
He was in control now.
Finally.
And when he kissed her, he never, ever, wanted it to go away again.
No air existed in the universe. In all of them. In every, single, damn one of them.
It was sucked away forever, and for the rest of eternity, Hinata was sure she would never be able to breathe again.
"Naru -"
There was a voice. Not hers. She was too occupied to speak.
But then she wasn't.
He pulled away. The man made out of fire, of light, of lava. Oxygen somehow returned to her lungs, but she could only swallow half a gallon of it before he leaned in and kissed her again. The back of her head was pressed against the door. It was hard and cold - no, hot - no, melting! And there were hands on her face, tempting her to lean forward, into him, into the very thing that was sucking all life out of her.
And despite the Sun King right in front of her, the world was becoming dim and dark.
"Naruto -"
And then she could breathe again. She gasped and hacked as her entire body leaned against the door, trying to keep herself on her feet. It was so, so warm, even when he wasn't right there. Even when Sasuke managed between them, a hand held in front of her, as if to keep something from getting to her, it was sweltering.
"Oi." That voice, she recognized. It was Naruto's. He was breathing hard, and it sounded like something was stuck in his vocal cords. "What are you -"
"Were you trying to kill her?" Sasuke snapped. That didn't sound at all like him. Not the cool, composed Sasuke she knew now. That sounded like Sasuke when they were young and he had just lost something important. "She couldn't breathe, and, hell, even if she could, she doesn't remember -"
"That's my wife," Naruto said. "I would never - I - Hinata."
She felt light-headed. It was so hard to focus and distinguish tones and watch all these colors and lights flash before her eyes.
Her knees gave in, and two arms grabbed her before she fell.
"Sasuke -"
"Give her ten minutes. Ten. Then you can talk."
"I . . . alright. I'm sorry. Did something happen? I . . ."
"Just let her breathe."
She was carried into her cell and placed on the futon. It was dark.
Thank goodness.
The light was starting to hurt her eyes.
There was a hissed curse, and when her vision finally steadied, she saw Sasuke by the low table, holding an empty glass.
"It's okay," she barely breathed.
But it was like he didn't even hear her. He looked like he was frowning at the wall, glaring, sneering. "You almost passed out," he muttered.
Angry.
He was so angry.
"It's okay," she tried again, hoping he would understand.
She didn't blame Naruto. She was just surprised and confused and -
"S-Sasuke." Tears slipped down her cheek as her trembling hands gripped at her chest. "It . . . w-won't stop. It's so fast it hurts."
And when he finally looked at her, it was like she was staring into her own heart. Hurting. Breaking.
It was freezing and there was no lightning, but she heard something snap as he walked over and knelt in front of her.
"Through your nose, out your mouth." He said. She breathed in. "Hold." She did, and he was holding her shoulders. But not to keep her steady. "Release."
She did it. Over and over and over again. Eventually, her heart slowed down, and her chest stopped hurting. But Sasuke -
Sasuke never stopped.
...
"Hey, are you okay?"
There was definitely something about Naruto Uzumaki.
At first, she hadn't given it much thought because she had been so convinced she was in love with Sasuke and vice versa. But now that she knew that was not the case, and thus was able to analyze the bigger picture of things.
She knew she used to be engaged to Naruto.
She knew he just kissed her.
And she knew that when he did, she was swept almost literally off of her feet. Her heart was still pounding from just the thought alone, and when he meekly entered the room after Sasuke left to get her water, she couldn't help but stare in awe.
What if . . . I'm still in love with him?
She knew she shouldn't be doing this again - assuming based on the little evidence she has.
But this was different.
Sasuke never kissed her.
Naruto did.
And she . . .
"Naruto," she exhaled, and she watched his eyes widen and his face turn flushed. He walked over to her and was sitting in front of her before she could even process everything. Those blue eyes were right there again, staring right into her, without falter.
"Hinata."
And, again, she couldn't breathe.
...
"I'm . . . okay," she somehow managed. "I think."
Tendrils of sunlight fluttered about the walls, scaring away the dark, and Hinata felt like she was in an open field somewhere, basking in the light of the open sky. The hard stone floor was replaced with lush glass. The walls were gone, and she could look out for miles.
It was nice.
He was nice.
"I'm sorry," Naruto mumbled after a moment, a hand sheepishly rubbing at the back of his head. "I must have scared you."
"N-No." The idea of seeing him sad made her chest ache, and she leaned over and placed a hand on his warm face. It wasn't a conscious decision. She just did it, like it was normal. And maybe it was. Maybe she did this all the time with him. "I was just startled, but I am fine."
He sighed and leaned his cheek into her palm, hands rising to brush her knuckles and keep her close. He looked starved, somehow. It was almost as if he would have died that moment if he didn't have this moment.
Then . . .
"You know I don't remember much," Hinata said, "so I have to ask. Are we . . . together?"
His lips turned in a warm smile. "You're going to be my wife, Hinata."
Every time he said her name, her heart skipped a beat.
"But . . . you're engaged to Lady Sakura."
At that, his hazy eye seemed to focus, and they both looked at the simple band on his left ring finger. Slowly, his hands took hers and removed it from his face. "You're right." He settled back on his heels, and she watched in startled awe as a line of black stickers sprouted along that very cheek she once touched. "It was Ino. She took my memories like she took yours and messed with my head, making me believe that I was in love with Sakura all this time. That's why we're engaged. But I . . . ."
Naruto's crystal blue eyes suddenly stormed and shifted, reminding Hinata of the sea during a hurricane.
"But I love you," he said, staring at her, dragging her into the deep depths of his gaze, "and - and you love me. You always have - I always have. And I know you do not remember much about me or what we had together, but - but - but even when I was being manipulated by Ino's magic, there was a part of me that knew. That's why I always came to seek you out, always tried my hardest to protect you, always came to you when I was at my worst. It was subconscious, but there was something there. And . . . it's in there for you, too. I know it is. Can't you feel it?"
She didn't have to think long on that because she already knew, already felt it, was already aware of it. Even when he was just a mysterious man cloaked in sunlight, even when he was just a name to her, she felt that connection. That pull.
Blushing, gaze falling to the small space between them, Hinata asked, "So what will you do?"
One of his hands landed on his left knee and curled into his robes. "No matter if this is all faked or not," he murmured, "we're still engaged. I don't want to hurt her anymore than I have. I need to figure this out before . . . anything else happens." He lowered his head to meet her eye. "Is that . . . okay?"
She smiled and nodded. "Of course, Naruto. And I - well, I need to remember you, too."
"That may take a while."
The door opened, and when they both looked, they saw Sasuke enter. He didn't glow in the light like the rest of the room did, and the weeds adorning his face made him look shadowed and eerie. He stepped to them and handed her a full glass of water, and as she worked to rub the much-needed moisture into her gills, he backed up into the wall and eyed both of them.
"A lot of this mess has been done specifically for you two to not be together," he said, "and I doubt it will be an easy feat to simply remember everything. Ino has limits she cannot break, even if she wanted to. And especially now that His Grace has regained his memories, the task will be even more difficult."
"His Grace?" Naruto snickered, grinning, despite the rather dour mood. "When did'ya start callin' me that?" Sasuke's eyes narrowed, but Naruto seemed unaware as he turned back to Hinata, humming. "But he's right. Ino was awfully tired when I left."
"And I'd like to remind both of you that because this is highly confidential and sensitive information, everyone has to act as if Ino is sticking to her duty of keeping these memories to herself, as if she is still abiding by the stalker's rules. You cannot act on the fact that you now know of all this. For all we know, you are still happily engaged to Sakura Haruno, and you -" His dull gaze fell on her, "are not in love with him."
Something hard and suffocating got stuck in Hinata's throat, but Naruto only sighed and stood. "I'm getting tired of you always being right," he muttered, then smiled in Sasuke's direction. "Yeah, alright. I'll play my part. Whatever makes it easier to catch this bastard."
Sasuke eyes the door. "Talk about it with Sakura."
"Of course."
She felt that hot, summery gaze back on her and looked up to meet Naruto's reassuring gaze.
"When it's safe, I'll try to come see you. I don't care how long I have to wait. I just want you to be safe."
Her fingers pressed against the spot right above her heart. "I want to remember you," she told him, hoping he understood, hoping he realized she wasn't about to give up on him, either. "I want to remember everything."
His hair blazed with light as he grinned down at her, cheeks rosy and sticker hissing and melting in the heat about him.
"I love you."
Oh, Gods.
"I-I . . ."
But it started again. Her heart was racing and her vision blurred, and she had to follow Sasuke's instructions in her head. In. Hold. Out. Hold. Again and again. And when she finally got a hold of herself, the room was dark, and only one figure remained.
"Get some sleep," he told her. He was near the door, hand resting on the handle, keys already in his other hand. "I'll speak with Ino tomorrow."
"Sasuke." He paused from leaving, but did not turn back. But, still, she smiled at him. Just in case. "Thank you. For everything."
He opened the door, and she blinked when nothing but cold air met her face.
"Don't thank me."
And he was gone.
Sasuke Uchiha was -
. . .
How he always was.
Stoic. Aloof. Unfeeling.
Of course. Because that's how it was supposed to be, it seemed.
And he didn't mind it. That was simply how life was. Whenever there was a speck of something good, it would always be torn down, taken away, stolen away. There was no point in relishing in the good and calm because it would be gone soon enough. And it wasn't so much that Sasuke was bitter about such a prospect. He was not. He was used to it. He lived by it.
But . . . sometimes, it stung.
But that was why Sasuke Uchiha was always, forever, without fault - stoic - aloof - unfeeling.
Because things can't sting if you don't let them, or if you're numb to the sensation of stinging.
Unfeeling.
Right. Of course.
"Sasuke."
And he did not have to perfect a cold, flat expression upon the approach of Karin's tall high heels - because why perfect something that was always, forever there? But he still took a short second to check the rest of his posture before he turned to her, hoping she didn't see -
What?
He was nothing.
"It's late," he said, and only kept it at that. He didn't feel chatty. He never did.
"I know - that doesn't matter - I -" She stopped, scowling, trying to capture the words that were right on the tip of her tongue. "The keys - Ino's cuff keys. They're gone. They were on my desk, and then -"
"Naruto took them," he cut in. "Or Sakura. One of them."
Her face turned red with rage. "What!? But -"
"Naruto remembers everything about the Moon Witch now."
"That - but -" Karin sneered to herself. "That's not - one of us needed to be there. I needed to be there. What if Ino turned on them!? What if she escaped just when she got their trust? What the hell were they -"
"It doesn't matter. It already happened." He stared at her as her mouth opened and shut, as if to speak more. He frowned. "What else?
Because there was definitely something else. She barely looked him in the eye, and for the next while, she was once again struggling to speak. He waited, shifting his weight to his right leg, wondering what could have possibly made her so tongue-tied. "Kankuro just came by with Kisame's corpse."
Ah.
That would be it.
"Where is it now?" he asked, moving to follow her to where it was being held.
But she didn't move.
"They're looking at it right now," she said. "It only happened an hour ago, so they have not figured out much. But it is Kisame. No disguise magic or anything."
He gave a short nod, pondering. "Did the Sand King find him out?"
"They're saying the corpse was left on the balcony of the king's chambers."
As that, Sasuke frowned. "Can you confirm that?"
"I'm sending an interrogator to Sand 1 first thing tomorrow morning." Her crimson eyes glanced over to the windows, which showed nothing but darkness. "Or later this morning, I suppose. But you know what this means, don't you?"
It meant a lot of things. It meant someone killed Kisame. It meant that there was one less person that could potentially lead them to the stalker. It meant that Kisame's name was somehow leaked.
But . . . it also meant that one of the main dangers for Hinata was gone, dead.
And that meant -
"Do you think it's a good time?" Karin asked, watching him. "By tomorrow, she can be out of that cell."
Right. But it was so much more tricky than that. Her memory was still, for the most part, completely missing. Sure, she could follow her normal routine of going between Ocean 11 and the bar, but she was unfamiliar with those places. She would need time to adjust to them, and Sasuke was never a man with hours of free time on his hands. Another bodyguard would be best, but after Suigetsu, could they really trust someone else with her?
The stalker was still out there, but they couldn't keep her locked up forever. It was already taking a toll on her - that much was obvious. And . . . there were people that needed her help. Sasuke was not about to deny that, either.
"I'll discuss this with Orochimaru tomorrow," he told her. "In case we need to find someone new to watch her, I need you to do an in-depth search of potential candidates."
Karin adjusted her glasses, nodding. "Anyone in particular?"
Me.
Because he was unfeeling and cold. Because he did his job well. Because it didn't matter whatever this soul-crushing pain in his chest was - it wouldn't affect him. He wouldn't let it. He would protect her. Perfectly. Flawlessly.
But not a word would escape his mouth, and he simply shook his head and left.
...
"S-Sasuke."
As he flew home, his head wouldn't shut up.
No matter how he tore through the wind, no matter how fast he flew, no matter how much he tried to ignore it, he kept going back to that cell.
"It . . . w-won't stop."
It was like his brain was trying to tell him something - She's in love with Naruto.
But he knew. He always did.
It was so fucking obvious.
"It's so fast it hurts."
He knew that feeling, somehow. He couldn't place it. Or maybe he could, but he didn't want to. But he's felt it before.
Felt it . . .
So much for unfeeling.
...
When he got home, he was holding his cloak in his arms. His cloak. He owned it. It fit him perfectly. It helped him blend in with the crowd. It helped hide his scabbard from any sharp-eyed bastards who were either trying to steal it from him or escape from it before he could unsheath it.
"You're not wearing it, Sasuke?"
But it was warm, and he was not that. It smelled like something that was not him. It felt soft under his rough fingertips. It never felt like that before.
Not until -
"Did something happen?"
Lightning cracked against his skull as he wound back and threw the cloak against the wall, no satisfaction at all coming when a loud thump echoed through the entranceway. It fell to the floor. A dark pile of nothing.
"Sasuke!"
"It's so fast it hurts."
And now he understood. He felt it - right at that moment.
She was right. It hurt. It hurt like hell.
"It's dirty," he muttered, ignoring his brother as he plodded to his room down the hallway. "I'll clean it later."
When Sakura woke up that morning and found the Sun King standing in the middle of her room, the first thing she did was look at his left hand, fully expecting to find it ringless.
But it wasn't.
And when her gaze snapped up, shocked, he could only offer an awkward smile.
"Can we talk?"
...
The maids brought breakfast in for them. They placed it on the small table near the foot of Sakura's bed, pulled out the two chairs for them, opened the windows to let in the sunlight and breeze, then left with quick bows to their heads.
Naruto waited for her to sit before he did, and while she poured their tea and sipped it, neither one of them touched their food.
Naruto not eating, huh? That's not a good sign.
"Did you get home fine after last night?" he asked after a tense moment. "I should have walked you."
"No," she said, and upon his surprise blink, cleared her throat and clarified. "I-I mean - I got home fine. Thank you. But, no, you did not have to walk me last night. There's . . . no reason for you to."
His gaze sunk down to her left hand that rested on the table. She was still wearing her ring - shit. Quickly, she slipped her hand to her lap, blushing, ashamed. But Naruto said nothing of it, only leaning back in his chair and soaking in the warm sunshine.
"This sucks."
She could not help but smile. How totally like him.
"It's not the greatest," she mused.
He peeked at her, matching her smile. "Everything seems so backwards and upside-down. Ino really messed with our heads, huh?" A small pause between them. A small breeze tickled the thin curtains, making them waft. Fresh grass and flowers filled the room, calming them slightly, making it a little easier to breathe. "You know we still have to pretend, don't you?"
She did. And it hurt to know that was the only reason he was still wearing that ring.
"You don't have to worry about me, Naruto," Sakura said. "I won't mess anything up. I promise."
His eyes opened fully as he stared her down. "That's not what I'm worried about." Her lips snapped together as he leaned towards the table, towards her. "Listen to me, Sakura. This is going to be rough for both of us. Even if we aren't . . . y'know, we've still known each other since practically day one. We're still friends. I still want to be friends. You're still important to me, and if I can help it, I don't want to lose you because of this."
Stop, Naruto. She begged in her head. Please. Just let me pretend for a little longer. I'm not ready.
"I can't give you what you want," he said, "and I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. And if, after this, you never want to see me again, I'll understand. It'll hurt like hell, but I'd rather it hurt me than you even more."
Her bones felt like they were cracking. She blinked her eyes to keep her tears at bay and cleared her throat once again. "I just need time," she whispered, trying to be as assuring as possible. "You're important to me, as well, and I don't want to lose you forever."
"Let's try to take this one step at a time," he said. "We'll figure this out."
He held his hand out to her, and after a second, she took it and melted in the warmth of his palm.
"Alright."
"And I'm sorry I left you yesterday," he added, smile morphing into a guilty grin. It didn't look natural on him. "That wasn't right. I should have stayed."
She shook her head. "You wanted to see her. I understand."
"Yeah, but no matter what, we're still engaged. That wasn't fair to you."
She pulled her hand back and took another sip of tea. "It's alright. It wasn't your fault." Placing the cup down, Sakura glanced to the side. "And it's not really Ino's, either. For a while, I thought it was. But she said that when you're in love, you'd do anything to protect them - and she's right. I'd kiil for you, Naruto. I'd die for you."
He shifted in his chair, uncomfortable. "Don't say that," he said, "I don't want anyone to die for me. Never."
She bit her lips together, not saying more. But it was true, and Naruto always deserved to know the truth.
"I kissed Hinata when I saw her."
His eyes watched her closely, seeing her heart shatter in her chest.
"Twice," he added, softly. "I'm sorry. I wasn't thinking, but you need to know."
It was so hard to keep that smile, but she saw the guilt in his eyes and knew he was not purposefully trying to hurt her by rubbing it in her face. He was being honest, and she appreciated it. "It's fine. Really."
"Hmm?" But then he smirked - that clumsy, boyish, adorable smirk she knew so well - and suddenly, everything seemed a lot better. Not completely alright, but . . . better. "Is this the real Sakura I'm talking to? No hitting? No punching? No yelling?"
She kicked his knee under the table, not hard enough to hurt him; just enough to let him know that she was strong, that she could get through this, that he really didn't have to worry so much.
"Smart ass."
He laughed, and she smiled with him.
Sasuke woke up thirty minutes earlier to drag his cloak to the sun porch in the back and scrub all the dirt and filth and warmth out of his cloak. The sun hadn't even risen over the horizon yet, and when he pulled his hands out of the bucket of freezing water, his fingers were pruned and stiff. He pulled his cloak out and wrung it until water stopped dripping from the cloth, and then he flew up high enough into the sky so that the wind was merciless and held it out until it was completely dry.
When he returned to his yard and entered his home from the back door, he could smell the ham Itachi was cooking. He went to his room to wash his face and pull on his cloak, which was cold and exactly how it should be, and then, finally, went to the kitchen.
Breakfast was already on the table, but he did not bother to sit across from his brother, instead standing next to the only chair and eating from there. Itachi frowned at his lack of manners, but did not mention it.
"What was all that about last night?"
Instead, he commented on the oh-so-obvious elephant in the room that Sasuke wished, for just once in his life, he would just ignore.
"I'm not in the mood," he said, then stuffed his mouth with the rest of the ham on his plate before moving to the kitchen sink.
Itachi followed him with his head. "I don't care. Answer the question."
Clicking his tongue, Sasuke ran water over the plate before dropping it into the sink. "I was busy and tired all day."
"So you threw the cloak mom made you?"
It didn't sound like him, he knew. But there was no way he was admitting anything - because there was nothing to admit.
"I just had a bad day," he said, going to the entrance to pull on his boots. "I've had them before."
"I've only seen you like this once," Itachi mentioned, "and it had to do with -"
"Don't." Sasuke sent his brother a warning glare across the room. "It has nothing to do with her. I already told you. It's nothing."
"You're a bad liar. You always have been."
Ignoring him, Sasuke walked past him and down the hallway. He shoved open the door on the opposite wall of his own, stepping into Itachi's large, more empty room. He went to the closet, which had shelves that he had built to be lower, and pulled out one of Itachi's cloaks with a hood.
Just in case.
"Can I have this?" he asked as he once again walked past his older brother and to the door.
Itachi gave the black cloak a once over, then nodded, albeit slowly. "Who are you giving it to?"
Sasuke snorted as he opened the door. "No one, probably."
...
He had multiple stops to go to that day, but when he first arrived at the Guard, he went straight to the medical wing first. There was a section in the back for long-time patients, a place he, personally, has never frequented. But Guards with serious injuries go there often, some for months on end. The only reason Sakura was not stationed there was because not only did none of their doctors know what was wrong with her, but she fought damn hard to be stationed in her manor, where she could still overlook everything.
But now Sasuke going straight there, and when he entered through the third room on the left -
He saw Suigetsu.
He lay, still, on a white medical bed with a thin sheet pulled tightly over him. Wires pumped with magic and oxygen and liquid medicine hung from the ceiling, surrounding him, some connecting to his arms. It was a small room with no chairs or places to sit. Barely anyone came to visit Guards. Most of them were without families, making it easier for them to give up their lives if need be.
But Suigetsu hung on. Suigetsu fought.
And there were people out there who cared about him.
There was a brother out there who was supposedly alive.
Huffing, Sasuke walked over to his side, looming, staring.
His breaths were small, but steady.
He's alive.
Obviously. But, still, it was hard to process. Rarely did people just survive the wing process. And if the Moon King had not come, Sasuke was quite sure Suigetsu would be dead, no matter if he had killed him or not.
"Stubborn bastard," Sasuke muttered.
He eyed the door behind him, listened in for anyone wandering about outside, then turned back to Suigetsu.
"I'll only tell you this because you love to stick your nose where it does not belong, and because Itachi won't leave me alone about it." He paused to peer at Suigetsu's unconscious face. "And it's not like you can annoy the shit out of me when I'm talking." Again, he stopped, this time to gather his wits. Funny. An Uchiha needing to find his courage. That's surely never happened before. "You and I both know it would eventually happen this way. The Moon Witch was bound to remember Naruto, sooner or later. But based off of how things are working, it's the sooner. And he remembers her. The dumbass went ahead without consulting us and now knows everything. Makes our job harder. Makes everything harder."
Static danced against his arms, and he sunk them into the depths of his cloak and took in a deep breath.
"I did not fight for Sakura," he said. "She moved on, and it was my own, damn fault. But had I known it was all fake, I never would have stopped trying." A ghost of a touch brushed his face, and he scowled and turned his head. "But this isn't fake. This is real. And he's loved her longer than . . . ."
Stop.
His right hand gripped his katana.
You're throwing yourself a pity party, fool. That's helping no one.
"If you were awake, I wonder what you'd tell me. 'Stop being selfish, Uchiha' or 'Fight for her, coward'?" A bitter smirk came to his lips as he traced his eyes along the cords and wires in the room. "Funny. The one time I need your advice, you can't give any."
Light breathing was all that reached him. Like it was mocking him.
"But then again, if you were awake, you'd be thrilled to see me like this." He adjusted the sheet so that they lay over his arms before turning to the door without a second glance. "Wouldn't you, bastard?"
...
He did not have to knock on the door to Orochimaru's office.
"Do not keep me waiting, Sasuke."
Because the man was always aware of everything that happened in the walls of the Guard.
There was something about their Head of the Guard that simply sent nervous tarantulas down people's backs. Sasuke, however, never minded or cared, and when he entered that room, there was not a scared bow of his head or a frantic swimming of his eyes. He walked, he approached, and he stood. When Orochimaru looked up at him from behind his folded hands, he looked back, and that made the Head smirk.
He loved it when people tried to play brave around him. But they both knew Sasuke did not have to play.
He was never afraid.
"You're a bad liar. You always have been."
"A corpse was brought to the Guard late last night," Orochimaru mused, eyes gleaming with delight. He enjoyed it when something unexpected hit the Guard. It made it easier to find the flaws in his system, the weaklings working under him."But you already know that."
A test. A pathetic one, at that.
"Have our people deduced how he was killed?" His tone was even and hard. Guards were supposed to be emotionless. He was supposed to be emotionless.
"You're a bad liar."
Orochimaru smiled with amusement before he tucked his chin to look down at a file before him. His dark hair swept over his shoulder as his thin fingers skimmed the crickled, paged corners of the parchment. "Quite gruesomely." A snicker rumbled in his throat as he held the file to Sasuke. "Whomever it was enjoyed what they were doing."
Ignoring him, Sasuke skimmed through the autopsy. Suffocation. Eleven stab wounds with a rigged blade. Two broken rib bones and a severely sprained ankle. He was also found dehydrated, which really caught Sasuke's attention. Sand 1 would be the best place to dehydrate an Ocean folk, aside from Sun.
"Karin said she sent someone to interrogate His Majesty -"
"Yes. Kabuto should be here within the hour with a full report."
Snapping the papers together, he dropped it on the desk the Head sat behind. "And the Moon Witch -"
"My poor, poor little Moon Witch." Orochimaru's slim, twisted smirk made electricity crackle against Sasuke's muscles. "It's safe enough for her, I'm sure. No harm in giving her fresh air and opening up another of our much-needed cells."
Like the guy actually cared if she would be safe or not, but Sasuke bit his tongue.
"And if she were to need another bodyguard -"
"I've already assigned one for her."
What. Sasuke blinked and had to focus, for a moment, on not sneering in disgust. "You have?"
"I hate repeating myself," Orochimaru sighed, glancing past him, towards the door. As if already bored with him. "Karin already has all the details. I'm much too busy to go over every single detail with you." He gave him an expectant look, but Sasuke did not move, and his smirk did not falter. "He'll be ready tomorrow afternoon, if you're that concerned."
Tomorrow? That soon? "We need time to evaluate him," he said.
"Hmm?" Orochimaru simpered. "You don't trust my judgement, Sasuke?"
Patience snapping, Sasuke scowled at him. "We all trusted Suigetsu."
But Orochimaru did not even blink. "Did we?"
Smoke could have been pouring from every pore in his body for all Sasuke knew, and with a strained bow, he turned on his heels and left with the few scraps of pride he had left.
...
When he approached Hinata's cell, Shizune was just leaving.
"Ah," she piped as she spotted him approaching. Her smile was polite as she bowed her head to him in greeting. His gaze remained on the shut door behind her. "Good day, Sasuke. I'm sure you've heard the good news."
Based off of how quickly previous gossip has passed through the Guard, Sasuke was sure everyone knew by now.
"Does the Moon Witch know?"
"I just told her," Shizune said. "She seemed excited to get out of the cell. I'm on my way to retrieve her belongings in storage. Would you like to join me, or . . . are you here to see her?"
"Neither." He gave her a quick look, then stared down the hallway. "I need to speak with Ino. When will the Moon Witch be released?"
Shizune hummed to herself, then replied, "In two hours. Give or take."
Nodding, Sasuke was about to leave, then remembered the pile of fabric situated in his right hand. "Has His Grace come to visit her this morning?" he asked.
Shizune blinked. "No."
"Do you know if he will be coming?"
"I've heard he's spending time with his fiance today."
Fiance. Right.
"Then he did not give her anything?"
Shizune's brows furrowed with confusion. "Give her something? No, I didn't see anything."
A part of him felt relieved. Prideful, even. But he swallowed that down before handing the black, hooded cloak to Shizune. "Give this to the Moon Witch," he said. "Tell her to wear it to hide her face."
She took it carefully in both of her hands, thumbs rubbing along the fabric. Her eyes squinted, then looked up at him. "You should -"
"No." He turned to leave. "I shouldn't."
...
He fell into muscle memory as he followed the basic procedure.
Pull out keys, unlock, pull open door, walk inside, adjust to darkness, shut door, lock door, call out for -
"Moon -"
Wait.
Right.
This wasn't her cell.
This was Ino Yamanak's, who was currently laying on her futon, dark bags under her eyes. But when she spied him across the room, her head shot up, and she pushed herself against the wall. Scared. Like he would eat her.
This wasn't the first time he's been in this cell, but it was definitely the first time he's been in there alone.
"Yamanaka."
"No," she whispered. "No, I won't do it again. I'm - I'm sorry, Sasuke! I'm sorry things are turning out this way again, but I can't do it. I won't!"
His jaw loosened a bit. What?
"Do what?"
She eyed him, still pressed against the wall, but she stopped shivering as she leaned forward and squinted through the dark. Ino looked like she was trying to hide something in him, but they both knew she'd find nothing.
"I . . . . You're not here to ask me to wash your memory again?"
Again?
"No," he said, dragging a chair over to sit next to her futon, "but now I'll have to ask what the hell you're talking about. I asked you to wipe my memory?"
Her eyes were dim and swarming. A hand came to her throat as her face folded in pain. Of course. The lock was keeping her from talking about it.
"Everyone," she eventually managed, voice hoarse, "becomes desperate at times."
He leaned forward, frowning. "I've spoken with the Moon Witch. I know you took away parts of my memory, most seeming to connect to her. At first, I thought this was due to the stalker's orders. Are you confirming that it's not?"
Ino nodded, choking on air.
"And you're confirming that, at one point in my life, I was desperate enough to go to you to ask for my memories to be washed."
Again, she nodded.
"Memories specifically about the Moon Witch." He folded his arms as her eyes met him, and that was all the confirmation he needed. "And why should I believe you? What proof is there that I asked you to do this, and that it was not the command of the stalker."
"Y-You don't have to believe me," she quickly said, "just don't make me do it again. I hate these powers. I hate using them. No matter what, the truth always comes back, and things become more miserable."
She was obviously frantic and exhausted, so he looked away, huffed, and said, "I came here to ask about His Grace, not to request you to use your magic."
A shaky exhale left her lips, and when he turned back, her shoulders were sloped. "Okay," she barely breathed. "Okay. What . . . did you want to ask me?"
"How difficult will it be to let the Moon Witch remember him?"
Ino's eyes widened, startled. He couldn't understand why. This was his job.
"It's dangerous," she said, shoulders curling. "It was already a big risk revealing it to Naruto. They don't want them to remember. My whole role in this was to make as many people as possible not remember Hinata and Naruto's relationship. If they find out I revealed it to her - to him - then -" Her throat closed up, and she hissed in pain. "It's dangerous."
"But you can do it," he pushed. "Bits and pieces. One at a time."
"Yes," she croaked, "but it will take time. Do you have time?"
You.
His eyes narrowed.
You. She was asking him. But why would it matter if he had time or not? He wasn't Hinata or Naruto.
Unless she . . . somehow . . . knew.
Knew what he was feeling. Knew what this revelation by Naruto was doing to him. Knew how dragging this out would affect him.
"You said I once asked you to wipe my memories about the Moon Witch," he said slowly, carefully. "Let's say I believe you. Why did I ask you?"
Her lips pursed and trembled as her cloudy eyes flashed. Her fingers rubbed the skin of her neck, then fell to her lap. "When you're in love," she murmured, "you do desperate things."
In love?
Love?
"When did you do this?"
Quietly, she answered, "Three years ago. When you were twenty-two."
Three years ago? But he wasn't in love with Hinata three years ago.
Or . . . maybe he was, and he just didn't remember. Because, as she said, she wiped his memory. He was well aware he could not remember anything about Hinata since meeting her in the bar eight months ago.
But . . . if he was somehow in love with her back then, all those years ago, then why would he -
Wait.
Right.
Because he was human, and he was not as unfeeling as he made himself out to be. And all this shit he was feeling right now was probably how he felt then. Because Naruto and Hinata have always loved each other. That much, he knew. And he also knew he had no place between them, so he wouldn't want to subject his friend to the same pain he felt if, by some miracle, he had a chance with her.
Which he didn't. He never did.
And if Ino asked him right then if he wanted to forget her, he would probably agree.
"You made me love Sakura," he muttered.
"You asked me to," she said. "You said it would make it all easier."
Because he was that desperate?
"I don't remember anything about her. She told me we met when we were six."
"I took away the love." Ino tucked back against the wall, but no longer out of fear. She was tired. She could hardly keep herself up. He was sure all the guilt had been running her dry of energy. "But then the stalker came, and I had to take the rest of it, as well."
He shook his head and stood.
He was never affected terribly by the lightning roaring inside him. But right now?
It hurt.
Everything ached horribly.
"When I came, you thought I was going to ask you to do it again. To make me forget it all again." When he looked down at her, he did not feel tall or powerful. He felt sick. Dazed. "How did you know that I . . . felt this way?"
And when she used all of her energy to lift her head and look back, there was nothing but sympathy. He hated it. He wanted to yell at her. To sneer. To put her in her place. But he couldn't. The anger wouldn't come.
"No matter what your brain forgets, no matter what I take or put into it, the soul always remembers." Her right hand pressed against the center of her chest. "Naruto's did, and he tried to run from it. I know Hinata's did, too. When she was at the manor, helping them, she looked so hurt. And right now . . . it seems that yours has remembered, as well."
So this whole time . . .
But -
There was no way.
And he kept telling himself that. Over and over and over again.
There was just no way.
Out the cell, down the hallway, through the portal, against the howling winds of Cloud 8.
No way.
"Itachi."
His brother was in the back, watching the clouds go by. He looked surprised to see his little brother there, huffing, as if he had run there from the Guard. And in a way, he felt like he had.
"You're early," he said. "Are you alright?"
No.
He nearly said it. He was tired of lying to him.
But -
"Do you remember the name Hinata Hyuuga?"
Electricity snapped and cracked and roared around them. He couldn't keep it in. He just couldn't. Itachi gave him a look, not flinching or cowering. He was used to it.
For a while, it was only the wind and the buzzing and the hissing.
Time sped up. Years passed, and still, no answer.
"Do you?" he asked. Pleaded. Begged.
Because he had to know if it was true. Ino and Itachi have never met, and her range was far too short to reach him. She wouldn't have been able to wipe his memory of anything, so if he knew a Hinata Hyuuga at all, if Sasuke had even mentioned something about her, then maybe - maybe -
"Yes, actually." Sasuke's shoulders fell, and Itachi smiled. "I do believe my little brother used to have a crush on her when he was a young and wild teenager."
Crush.
Oh, Gods.
"Why?" his brother mused.
But Sasuke didn't hear him.
...
"S-Sasuke."
When he was young, he used to see the corpses of his parents in the hallway outside his bedroom door. It used to scare him so much that he wouldn't leave until Itachi would come and take his hand and walk with him down the hall.
Sometimes, he still saw them.
It still scared him, but he was an adult now. He would just walk over them, knowing they weren't real, that his mind was playing tricks on him, that they were, hopefully, in a better place now.
But that early morning, his parents weren't the ones to greet him in the hallway.
It was Hinata.
She was smiling, a soft, silver glow surrounding her. It reminded him of something.
But that didn't matter.
"What are you doing?" he asked. "You shouldn't be here."
She didn't reply, only leaned into him and pressed her head against his chest. Her hands slipped into the sleeves of his cloak, grasping his arms, sending lava into his bloodstream.
But despite feeling so hot, he was frozen.
"Oi."
"I love you," she whispered into his tunic.
His jaw clenched. "Don't." He pulled his arms away from her and frowned. "You can't."
Her wide, moonish eyes fluttered. "I can't?"
What?
Did he have to spell it out to her?
"Naruto," he gritted.
But she only blushed and smiled and held her arms out to him. "Who's Naruto?"
Who's -
What was she doing? She knew damn well who Naruto was. She was in love with him.
"Sasuke."
In love . . . with . . . .
When her arms wrapped around him, he did not pull away this time. Didn't even think about it. Because it was nice. Because it was her. Because he liked her and wanted this for what seemed like forever.
He was tired of being selfless.
Thus, like a mockingbird, he said, "Who's Naruto?"
"Naruto?"
Suddenly, Itachi was there, and the hallway seemed a lot less crowded.
"His Grace? That Naruto?"
Shit.
He left the hallway before he had to explain anything further to his nosy brother.
...
When he stepped into the blue portal that would take him to the Hall, Hinata stepped in with him, laughing when his head snapped her way.
"I didn't mean to scare you."
"Leave me alone," he hissed under his breath.
Nothing about her changed. Not the softness in her gaze or the pink in her cheeks. "But you hate being alone."
Chest tightening, heart roaring with the lightning in his lungs, Sasuke stepped out of the portal, leaving her there to melt in the colors. The real Hinata, he knew, was out of the Guard and back to her normal schedule. And if she was used to things like he hoped she was, then at this time of the morning, she should be -
There.
In the furthest corner of the bar, covered in his brother's hooded cloak - she was there.
And he couldn't breathe.
She looked perfect there. She belonged there. The natural browns and golds surrounding her, the whisper of talk about her, the warmth of the room enveloping her. That's where Hinata Hyuuga belonged, not in some cold, grey cell.
And when she looked up and, from under the shadow of her hood, those silver eyes found him, she stood and grinned.
"Sasuke."
Her voice somehow reached him from across the way, and when he stepped forward -
Wait.
This wasn't right.
Because Hinata belonged here, sure; but he didn't. He never did. He belonged in the Guard, hunched over paperwork or pacing in the interrogation rooms.
He shouldn't be here. With her.
This wasn't right.
Her smile dropped as he took a step back, but when he turned -
"There are stickers everywhere."
...
He was sitting on one of the stools at the bar, and she was sitting next to him, leaning towards him, hands tracing his jaw. She was close and she was glowing and nothing else mattered to him.
"Hinata."
No lightning. She smiled and tipped her lips to his.
"Let me help you get them off."
...
No.
No . . . !
His entire body flinched. He was back in his house, looming in the doorway, eying the shelf by the dining table.
Stop it! he yelled in his head. Get a hold of yourself.
Itachi was fast asleep, and he slipped out of the house before he could wake them. The trail leading to the portal's gate was covered with the corpses of his parents. Suigetsu was there, too, begging for death, and he even saw his brother out there, sleeping with bloody wings sprouting from his back.
But it didn't matter. Because -
"G-Good morning, Sasuke."
When he was in the portal, Hinata was all he could see. She helped him breathe, helped him forget, helped him move forward. And it was selfish. So selfish. Because he wanted that all to himself. He wanted to keep her close and never let her go.
His Moon Witch.
His.
Selfish, Uchiha.
He stepped out, and she was still there. Still standing by the table in that corner of the bar, lips pursed and worried as she stared out at him, waiting, wondering.
Be selfish, Uchiha!
Because no one could be selfless forever. Sometimes, you have to put yourself first.
Alright.
...
He took that step forward, towards the bar, towards the back corner, towards her.
"Sasu -"
And when he got there, he kissed her.
And when she kissed him back, all he could do was hope that Naruto wasn't there to see them. Because he was a selfish Uchiha, not a cruel one.
...
"Me too," he gasped, breaking away from her lips, staring straight into her. "I -"
She took his face and pulled him forward and kissed him again, sucking in the lightning from his lungs and helping him breathe once more.
...
He woke up staring at a familiar ceiling feeling like his stomach had been ripped out of his abdomen. His chest was heaving and his face was hot, and when he ripped the blanket off of him and fell onto the ground, the first thing he did was crawl to the door and pull it open.
The hallway was empty.
No corpses. No moonish eyes.
His head fell forward, heavy enough to fall off his neck, as he gasped and gaped and choked, trying desperately to fill his lungs with something.
"Sasuke!"
There was squeaking, and when he managed to look up through his tangled and sweat-drenched bangs, he saw Itachi, one hand on his shoulder and the other holding his jaw.
"Are you okay?" he asked, voice pitched and scared. He hated when he sounded like that. He hated when he made him sound like that. "Did you see Mom and Dad again?"
...
Selfish, Uchiha.
Be selfish.
...
He was tired of lying to his brother.
"Yes. I saw them."
But Sasuke Uchiha, when it came to his brother, could never be selfish.
Chapter 20 - End