A/N: This was super weird to write guys. And once I get into the later chapters I will explain so I don't spoil it for new readers. I want the older readers though to tell me if this is a better way to see this chapters. Wow, what even are words? That made sense in my head. But, I'm keeping it. Any way, I think this chapter might be my pride at the moment because there is so much I want to say about this chapter but I can't because it gives away way too much.

Anyway, I'll let you read instead of reading me babble. Please comment, question and send me a thought about anything. I want to hear from people.

Chapter 20: Dreams Parallel Reality

A Wish

Dreams come spatially then there is darkness. One moment I think I am about to wake up the darkness swallows me back up. This is a drag, I should be awake but I keep getting swallowed by the darkness. I feel something snap, like a twig. This twig breaks and maybe things will get better.

I never feel like I am getting anywhere. The darkness is never ending.

I remember one dream though, Shikamaru and I were laying under our tree and talking.

Our tree.

What a weird thought.

But it's the tree we always go to talk. The tree where I started to trust Shikamaru. Where I really started to begin to build a friendship, the first true friendship that I have every had.

Seems so nice. Nice to want something like that.

We were watching the cloud go by. There were so many out that it was almost sickening to watch.

I wasn't in my own body though, I was watching from the outside, as though I am a by stander watching these two teenagers fall in love with their laughing and inside jokes about something.

Falling in love? That is such an odd thing for me to think. Knowing me, I would have never believed it. I cannot hear what they are saying to one another but I know it's deep. Something that I have always longed for.

Do I actually have that with Shikamaru? Did I make those feeling with him?

I want that. I feel like I know what I want, but I also need to focus on what is important. And that is the thing… do I really want that? Yes I slightly do.

No, you don't know what love is, this could be something else. You aren't special. You are the Hokages dog.

I shake my head and keep watching.

Naruto comes up to the tree with Hinata and they sit down and talk with the two kids. No, that's me and Shikamaru. They laugh and the scene changes to a night out at the fair in the Leaf.

Everyone is there and holding onto their partner. Shikamaru stays close to the other me's side, almost wrapping his arm around her. He pulls her face closer to his. Shikamaru pulls away as the rest of the group to boo. Shikamaru let's go and grabs her hand.

I feel the blush creeping up onto my cheeks. I want to be there, in that body by Shikamaru's side. Only I know that it is not possible because of the situation surrounding me.

I am out of there because this isn't real. This isn't what I want in life, what I want is something very different. I don't want him, not in real life.

There is an alarm, one that requires all jonin and ANBU to go protect the village.

Moments like this are the worse. She looks at Shikamaru and runs off, pulling me with her. Leaving Shikamaru alone. I don't know what happens to him But I can feel myself worrying about him.

We go to the main entrance of the village and see the copy group. She does not waver, knowing this is what she was born to do, protect the village. She is one of the first to respond to the alarm with a few others around her.

There is an exchange of words and then fighting. She dodges and fights but they begin to get the upper hand on her with each one focusing on double attacks and blocking her every move. No one else has come. The odds do not look good for her. They are surrounding her and she is breathing heavily. Eventually she is knocked out and I am again swallowed by darkness.

Only to wake up to more darkness. Moments where there is nothing but I can't feel my own body. I need to do something. The twig breaking is important. I need to know what is happening. But the sleep over takes me.

July 1st:

I wake up in my bed with Shikamaru asleep next to me. I see only the moon light, I look over at Shikamaru who is fully asleep. He looks so peaceful, and maybe even a little happy. I guess he must be having a good dream.

I look back up at the ceiling, becoming lost in thought. That dream. I wish I was in the body of other me. But isn't that where I am now? I am asleep next to Shikamaru. Someone who I have said I like only I have no idea if I really like him or not.

You don't even know him.

After a moment of looking at the ceiling I remember what happened and I shoot up, waking Shikamaru. I look around and try to find my kunai or shuriken but I can't. I need to defend myself, he could come at any moment.

I feel a hand on my shoulder, "Calm down Tooru. That person isn't coming back. And we figured out how to stop whatever they did to you. We went through every one, which was a drag, and figured out that I need to sleep in the same bed as you holding you or the jutsu takes effect. But some moments I just have to stay in a bubble that you put up, which helps me get up and I think you subconsciously realized that," Shikamaru explains in a sleepy voice.

"But what about if you have to go anywhere or…" I question.

I am worried that this will cause some trouble. There is a lot of things that can happen. Shikamaru could have gotten called away or even had to do something.

"Tooru, you've been asleep for three days, the times you were probably freaking out is when Naruto and Sakura would hold you down until I came back. I had to report to Kakashi at one point and everyone except Hinata was here trying to make sure you did not go and try to kill everything. Naruto and Kiba are very close to figuring out your past," Shikamaru yawns.

I look down at the blankets and mumble, "They… they are?"

"Yes," Shikamaru replies, "They know more about your clan and how you watched us when you were younger and the war."

Impossible.

I nod, "That's impressive, how did they…"

"By asking yes or no questions," Shikamaru chuckles.

Liar.

There is a pause. I cannot look at him. I know that he has been here, for three day taking care of me. Three days that I have been useless to the village. I know there is no excuse for it. But someone took care of me.

I cannot remember the last time anyone ever did that for me.

Three long days of laying here next to me, doing nothing. I know I could not do that, but Shikamaru is a very different person than myself. Just the fact that the leader found me is hard to believe. I was an idiot for letting that happen and allowing him to get into the village. It should have never happened to begin with. I should have been ready for it.

Then I remember something else, I had to kiss him. I had to tell him something but I couldn't speak. But I don't think it was the right thing to do.

"I… I'm really sorry about kissing you…" I say, feeling very shy around him.

"Don't be so troublesome. You transferred memories to me. It helped," Shikamaru sits up and leans into me.

He rest his head on my shoulder and brushes my hair out of my face. I feel slight heat to my face. What is wrong with me? Getting frustrated by having Shikamaru close to me. That kiss was professional and meant nothing more. At least to me I hope.

But that dream… I wanted to be her.

You can never be her.

No, that isn't what this is about right now. I shouldn't be thinking like this.

But the heat on my face would say anything else.

I need to change the subject.

"I felt something change in you…" I begin and never finish.

Shikamaru sighs, "Yes, Temari is a memory now," he pulls my chin up to look at him, "I feel something with someone new. I'm hoping it isn't a drag since I don't know how she feels about me."

Why did they change so fast?

"Why else are you here?" I ask, becoming lost in his eyes.

"This jutsu causes violent fits and physically tears your body apart, which is all healed. Even though I am with you, we don't know if you still have nightmares. Although telling by your reaction you are still having the nightmares," Shikamaru whispers.

I shake my head, "No, I remember what happened and the last thing I remember is kissing you and that someone was looking for us."

I know I am lying. I've never lied to anyone. But I don't think I should tell him. I don't want to. I said I don't remember the dream, but I remember it.

You broke a rule. No lying.

Shikamaru chuckles, "I'll explain more in the morning, it's late and we both need to sleep so we can also figure out what this group wants with us."

Shikamaru yawns and pulls me down next to him. I curl up and fall back asleep.