Awkward purchases.

Daniel pulled into a parking lot; the last place he'd ever think he'd be. During his time off, with what little spare time he had, when he wasn't spending it with his friend, he made a few calls. He called two people, in particular, and both of them suggested he do the same thing.

Take the person to pick something out for themselves.

He dreaded having to do this. He thought there would be a universal rule, a helpful tip… but no. Not everyone has similar needs. He knew that much… but a small tip… anything to lessen the chances of having to do this.

Killua leaned forward when Daniel's face planted on the top of the man's steering wheel, looking directly at the store sign. It was flashing bright white light in the pitch-black darkness of the night sky "Uhh… why Sexy Mart?"

"We're going window shopping… for dildos."

Killua's expression almost beamed "Great, I thought I'll have to use my fingers for the rest of my time on this planet."

"T…M…I…" Daniel spoke slowly, "I rather not know."

"Do humans not use their fingers?"

Daniel leaned backwards, sighing out loud "As a gay guy who has friends who happen to be girls, YES… they do. But you're a really, close friend, who I live with. I rather not know what you're doing with your fingers… and I hope you're washing your hands afterwards."

"Of course… that's unsanitary." Killua murmured under their breath as they looked away, eyes remaining on the building, "So… are we going to stare at the building until someone comes out?"

"No, we're going inside. But can I make my peace, knowing, that I know what my housemate is going to buy?"

"Give me your card, I'll go in and out and you'll never have to be there."

"Oh, trust me, I will rather be there so you don't get scammed buying all these lubes and whatnot. Plus, my friend works here. So… at least I can have a bit of a conversation while you… look for the thing that you… and I quote my friends said: Helps you get off."

"Okay…" Having made his peace, Daniel pulled the key out of the ignition "let's do this."

"~"

Daniel walked in, trying to be all casual when he approached the counter, as though he were about to make an undercover drug deal "Hey, Ikalgo. Long-time, no see…"

Ikalgo looked up from his magazine, "I didn't peg you as a fellow…" He stopped when he saw someone standing by the man's side, someone he couldn't deny looked hot. He was posing like a model. Where does Daniel meet these guys "Who's he?"

"I'd prefer them…" Killua gave a slight nod, offering the best smile they could, given what he's learned from what Daniel does from time to time. They're trying to learn the ropes, replicating human mannerisms when they can.

Hot and well-spoken… Ikalgo thought to himself "Again, the model?"

"Killua… meet Ikalgo… Ikalgo… meet Killua." The man gestured to each as he spoke their name, the two giving each other a courteous nod.

"So, what can I do for your friend?"

"They are going to have a look around… we are just going to talk."

"Certainly." Ikalgo pointed to the walls, "Each section is labelled, if you need assistance, give me a holler."

When Killua left, searching for the dildos section, Ikalgo took a peek, seeing where the person went.

Daniel, however, had other ideas. Snapping his fingers, he drew his friend's attention back to himself "Hey, no perving."

"Perving…? You randomly bring in this extremely hot model and NOT expect me to be a little curious."

"First of all, yes. Second, that's my friend and housemate."

"Holy shit, you're living the, they were roommate's lifestyle."

"No, we're not… Hey, I can agree the menu looks enticing, but I just went through a breakup. I'm not planning to order anything right now."

"Damn, break up or no… I'd tap that."

Daniel raised an eyebrow, a little shocked "Wait, since when were you Bicurious?"

Ikalgo looks towards Killua, only to have his attention snapped back at his friend "What…? They're a really attractive guy… um, person. Feminine features, the pretty boy vibe. I'd tap that…" Ikalgo motioned with a slight blush.

Daniel was still in shock. Ikalgo wasn't completely straight, and he was only learning this now.

"Since when… you, hentai perv?"

Ikalgo frowned, "First of all… rude." The man put his hands on his hips, "I thought you'd be the least judgmental."

"You admitted you're a perv and like tentacle porn, you don't get to pull that high and mighty card on me." Daniel joked, arms now crossed as he pouted.

Ikalgo sighed, "I am, but it's still rude to air out my laundry like that. Besides, it's not tentacles… it involves an octopus, which happens to have tentacles. None of that weirder alien or demon tentacle breeding shit."

Daniel acted like he was offended, "Breeding… now I'm offended."

"You're a vanilla gay guy. You don't get to complain…"

Daniel rolled his eyes, ignoring the fact that Ikalgo dismissed the idea that he has some weird kinks of his own. The less they know… the better "No, but seriously. Bicurious?"

"I don't have a strict form of sexuality… I go after girls, but there's a few guys or in this case, fellows I'd hit on." Ikalgo murmured under his breath, once more trying to check the fellow out. This time Daniel didn't stop him.

They had an ethereal glow, an angel-like entity who probably had interesting kinks, if they were willing to get a friend to bring them to a Sex toy shop.

"Since when?"

"Can I say since you brought them in?" He turned back to his friend, only to see them not impressed. Daniel didn't believe him at all. He was a trained professional, someone whose profession borderlines on getting people to talk about hidden feelings "What? I thought you'd let me sample the eye candy you brought here…"

"I accept Killua as being non-Binary. What makes you think I won't accept Bisexuality?"

"Whoa… WHOA…" Ikalgo dismissed the idea "let's not go there."

"You like girls, you'll go after some guys… but Bisexuality is too far for you?" The man raises an eyebrow at his friend, unsure how to address the conversation. It's something he was just finding out, while his alien friend was perusing dildos like they were in a museum.

At least… that was what he thinks Killua was doing, given that they were showing no reactions while they were looking over the sex toys. Killua is a master in zero facial reactions.

"How about… Straight with exceptions?" Ikalgo admitted.

Daniel looked back at his friend, a little bemused "The answer is no. I'm not letting you explore your sexuality with Killua. You like octopus, which happened to have tentacles porn."

"That's a low blow for even you… besides, what makes you think I have a chance of scoring a night with them. Unless I do… Are you perhaps a little jealous I might steal them away from you?"

"No… but, if I were to look over the counter, would you happen to have a rager pointed at Killua like it's a heat-seeking missile."

"No, you may not. I work in a sex shop, of course, I'm gonna have one. I'm surrounded by pussy and dick my entire shift."

"Uh… huh."

"No, but seriously. If I brought Killua in and you've been single for ages, you wouldn't take a second look."

"You're on your fifth look right now. Tear your eyes away from them."

"What if… I bring them on a date."

"With you…?" Daniel looked the man up and down, "Not to be judgemental, but I don't even have a chance with Killua. Also, I draw more girls than you do when we used to go clubbing."

"Hey, everyone knows gay guys are like chick magnets. They flock to you, then you direct them to me."

"Uh-huh… I'm your wingman. No, but seriously. I don't wanna come home to a moaning mess."

"I wouldn't do them in your house… that's just rude."

Daniel chuckled at the comment, "Alright, alright… I'll be a little honest. I just met them; they're going through a tough time… getting them a hooked up or a fling is the last thing I want to put Killua through."

"Killua is an adult, they can consent. Besides, I'll take them on a date we'll do the deed at my place and I'll bring him back home to you."

Daniel looks Ikalgo up and down, "I respect my friend, enough to not put them through a situation like that."

"Alright, Mr I'm-not-judgey. Why don't we ask them…?" Ikalgolooked his friend dead in the eye, challenging him to a battle of the wits. Daniel seemed awfully controlling of a friend he supposedly just met. Was he hiding something? He bets Daniel is attracted to them, it's just his afraid to admit that "Well…?"

Daniel sighs in defeat. Pushing his friend will only make him dig a deeper pit for himself. He is attracted to Killua, but a fling or dating… he's not ready for something like that. He wanted to get to know them better and more importantly… he doesn't want to jump from one ship to the next.

He knows what happens when he gets out of one relationship and straight into the next, especially one, he was emotionally invested in for a long time… it's a disaster waiting to happen. A break-up… he wished he never went through "Fine. Hey, Killua… come over here."

Killua jogged over, stopping in front of the two "Sure, what's up…?"

"Ikalgo finds you attractive and would like to do the nasty with you."

Ikalgo looked mortified at his friend "Don't word it like that… Killua, don't listen to him." The man then gestured to the other, their expression remaining neutral, even though they were just told someone would like to have sex with them.

Killua must be able to tame their emotions, or maybe they were secretly a perv in hiding too "I would like to take you on a date, maybe have a little fun."

Killua looks at Daniel, frowning a little. He can't read his friend's expression. But given the content, do the nasty and have a little fun must mean sex, so just like Gon… they're going to have to disagree, even if they want to have sex. Honestly, Ikalgo isn't bad to look at.

He's no Gon or Daniel… but with the red, auburn messy hair… dark brown eyes… the slight lean build, he has his attractive attributes. A lot of humans so far have some amazingly attractive attributes, but the whole hiding their identity makes it almost impossible to date anyone.

The only one who knows is someone off-limits. Looking back, they turn to face Ikalgo "I'm gonna agree with Daniel. No."

Ikalgo was surprised, "Huh, what do you mean by that…? Could you hear us from over there?"

"No…" Killua paused for a second, "But I could feel someone…" They looked back at Daniel "What's the saying you used?"

"Checking you out?"

"Yes, I could feel someone checking me out. You weren't being subtle about it. It's strange… getting used to this weird culture here." Daniel gave them an incredulous look. It's not that they were telling a lie, human mannerisms were plain weird at times. The point, however, of Daniel's reaction seemed justified. If they look at it through Daniel's eyes, Killua was unconsciously outing themselves via their latest statement.

Ikalgo raised an eyebrow "Weird culture? Daniel, what have you been teaching them?"

"Nothing weird… I promise. He's talking about cruising…"

"Ahh…" Ikalgo murmured, not that surprised. Cruising was a weird concept even for him. That would make sense if Killua was aware of it. Plus, they barely knew him so they could be assuming they were being hunted for another single pump and dump fleeting moment.

He may have also accidentally assumed Killua was one to go after flings, given their beauty would attract those kinds of people… He guesses he was one of the latest to fall into that quick assumption ditch.

"How about a date, with NO sex…" Ikalgo emphasized the no part, "I know Daniel's a busy guy… and you look like you barely get out much."

"I honestly… don't mind. I usually read or just watch movies on Netflix."

"Borrrrring…" Ikalgo yawned, "Staying cooped up. How about this… we can watch a movie at the big screen cinema while sharing some popcorn, play a board game or something else…"

"Board game…?"

"Like, DnD? Dungeons and Dragons. Actually… I'll be going to one this coming Friday night. Why don't you come to Daniel?"

"Sorry, got a work session on Saturday morning. No can do."

Ikalgo clicked his tongue in annoyance, "That sucks. Could've been like the old days."

"Who's going?" Daniel interrogated.

"The usual. Meleoron, Knuckle, Iason and Shoot, I believe…"

"Oh, Gon's not coming he usually loves playing with Iason."

"Nah, he and Sakura are planning to go on a date that day."

Daniel looks over to his alien friend, "I think you might like it. It's a fair bit of roleplaying. Iason and Ikalgo will both show you the ropes."

"Sure, sounds interesting…"

"Then it's a date!" Ikalgo wiggles his eyebrows, while giving them finger guns.

Daniel rolled his eyes, "I'm trusting Killua in your care. No funny business…"

"Me…? Funny…"

"I mean it… I care about them. So, treat them right…" Daniel points at the guy, "Now, let's do the thing I dreaded." Shifting his attention, he smiled at his friend "Killua, see anything you like…?"

"I saw a few, but I'm coming in here blind…"

Daniel then looked to his friend, "Well, as a sex toy store owner… what would you suggest?"

"I'm assuming not porn…"

"Definitely… not porn."

"So…" Ikalgo blushes before turning away "I have to help the person, whom I technically hit on… pick out a…?"

"Dildo…"

"Do you have a preference…? Length, girth? Texture? Ribbed for her… or in your case, their pleasure."

Killua looks at Daniel, so many terms thrown at them in a matter of seconds. Did all of that matter?

"Don't look at me… I'm not telling you my preference."

"I thought you were a top only…" Ikalgo crossed his arms. Looks like they were both learning something new about each other. Daniel apparently, uses dildos from time to time.

"Some men gotta have their secrets." The man winks at his friend.

Killua looked back to Ikalgo "I don't care about size, just length. So, what you got."

Ikalgo sighed, "Next time can we start with this… before I hit on them…"

Killua looked smug. Even though they will be going on a date later in the week, him, being so shy about the situation felt raw and fun. Humans were so fun, not reserved and boring like the rest of their species.

Ikalgo directed the two to the shelves, eyes scanning through the lengths "So there's a few…" Bringing his hand down, he tapped a few of the shelves, "I'd aim more for things like these, ignore the PVC… Yes, we sell it, but it's not the best for ye… privates. I'd aim for either… Silicone, Stainless Steel or, glass. Borosilicate Glass, not that other cheap shit. It may look pretty, but it's more of an erotic paperweight if you ask me."

"Why do you sell it…?"

"Because some people are cheap… or don't have the kind of funds to fork out for an expensive ass pounder."

Daniel chuckled "Sounds about right, Killua I'll say Silicone or glass. They're the ones notorious for having textures built into the design. Stainless steel is not fun if it's cold."

Ikalgo was now more curious about his friend "And you know a lot for a guy that has his secrets."

"Advice I looked up earlier… no reason to be a little cautious."

"You'd think I'd scam you, friend, with cheap toys…"

Daniel smirked slightly a playful jab at the ready "Yes…"

"You wound me…" The man feint offence. Daniel knows him better than that, maybe he was acting like this to get Killua out of their shell, to have a little fun while conversing with him.

Killua looked between the two, before glancing back at the wall. With the newfound information, they had a better idea of what they were looking for. Killua's eyes stopped at a toy, a little intrigued, "Alien…?"

Ikalgo shrugged "Alien is anything they'd not consider normal or animalistic, in nature. Kind of like horse cocks. Some people like them, but I do not… not that I bottom or anything. It's just they don't look like it'll be a pleasant ride… not that I use dildos. I'm a butt or Vag kind of guy. However, they're considered long… unfortunately, they can also be very thick. So not for amateurs"

Killua took in that information.

Human toys were very extensive. They weren't limited to just the human penis', but other species as well. Alien privates just surprised them. They don't know, however, how much is made up or in the human mind. There was no name set for this particular alien species cock.

Looking over the design, Killua decided against it. It was too curvy for them. They weren't planning on exercising or performing aerobics with their Acronis, they were there to seek pleasure. Moving through the selection, Killua eventually picked one that had realism etched into their name, a bit of texture that might feel nice when sliding it in them.

Daniel paled, once he saw which one Killua picked. They have similar tastes. Oh god… he just had to pick the same one I have.

"I think this one…" Killua looked over, seeing his friend's unique response first before the adult toy shopkeeper "Are you okay."

"I'm good… just saw the price tag."

"It's all good. I'll give you the friend discount."

"The friends with benefits kind?" Daniel wiggled his eyebrow suggestively.

Ikalgo decided to play the game with his friend, they have that sort of friendship "I dunno… apparently, you're a top only. My man butt isn't designed for receiving a pounding."

"It's never too late to try it… Bussy is made, not born with."

Ikalgo burst into laughter, "Okay, okay… you got me good. You're hot and all, but I top only."

Daniel snorted, "Shame…"

"Besides, I don't need to use the benefits card. I get into people's pants with my own merits… and charm. You haven't been wooed by the great Ikalgo. I have skills in the lady's department."

"You're barking up the wrong tree mate. I have a dick, not a vag."

Ikalgo shrugged "Eh, you got me there. Alright, let's see how cheap I can get it for your friend."

Typing away, the man searched the barcode through the system to see how much of a bargain he could give. Daniel was a close friend, best friends with one of his now closest friends Gon. He ain't about to be cheap with Killua, not when this new friend, could be a potential date.

"So, I can go as low as One… thousand and nine hundred Jenny without flagging the system."

"Sounds good…" It was only one hundred Jenny more expensive when I brought it. Producing his card, he smiled at his friend "Sounds like a bargain."

Ikalgo raised an eyebrow, "Wait… you're paying for it?"

"Of course… I lost a bet with Killua, so now I have to purchase it for them."

"My cheapskate friend…" Ikalgo's eyebrow raised further, "Is going to buy it without bargaining further."

"I'm not cheap… I just know how to bargain. Considering it was being sold for two thousand and eight hundred Jenny, I'd call that a bargain."

"Yeah… you keep telling yourself that." Ikalgo whistled whimsically, putting it through the machine. When Daniel tapped, the payment going through, Ikalgo put the product in an inconspicuous bag "Enjoy your new… toy."

Killua grabbed the bag, smiling cheekily "Oh, I will… in fact, I'm gonna use it tonight."

The two men groaned, Daniel, complaining more about the knowledge of TMI, knowing that they're going to be using it tonight. Ikalgo's complaint was more about knowing that not only is Killua going to be pleasuring themselves tonight, but he also won't be able to have a piece of the person on Friday night.

"~"

Daniel pouted, mainly from the fact of how excited Killua seemed to be, to an inanimate object. There was a churning of uncomfortableness in the pits of his stomach, and it wasn't because Killua was going to explore themselves with an adult toy.

It was for a different reason…

"Hey, Killua…"

"Yeah?"

"So, I won't stop you, I'm just going to give you a few helpful tips I learned over the years… which I think will affect you. First, limiting the mess… if you're going to use the toy, wash it before and after use. I'll show you where I keep the toy cleaner…"

"Alright…" Killua tilted their head slightly, "Anything else?"

"Yes. If you're going to do it in the bedroom, lay a towel down on the bed. If you're doing it in the bathroom, considering that one has a suction cup… slap it onto the wall… do ya thing, and wash it while in the shower. If done on the bed, throw the towel into the basket, and I'll chuck it in the wash. Eventually, I plan on showing you how to use the things like washing machine, dishwasher, stove, etc so you won't have to wait on me."

"Sounds good…"

"Oh, two more things. Keep the toy in your room and don't use it while we have guests over."

"Did you… just assume I'll pleasure myself while there is a chance someone else can see me?" Killua was a little offended at that. They would never put themselves in a situation where they could be outed like that.

"No, I'm just being precautious… for your sake." Daniel briefly glanced in his friend's direction "I want to make sure you're safe in my home." I'll… I'll protect you. He briefly thought about his mental feelings, wondering how much of it was because he has feelings for Killua, or how much of it was because he was trying to justify his reasoning.

"Alright, but you're showing me how the suction cup works and how to lay the towel down."

"Sounds fair… as long as you don't make me watch you go to town on the toy." He chuckled awkwardly, considering one part of his mind would readily agree to stay and watch. Not because he was a perv or anything. There was a bit of curiosity involved…

He wondered how a Valiskarian might use a human toy on themselves.

Plus, there was a difference in human and Valiskarian biology he was a little interested in.

A\N: Due to the nature of this story, the next chapter will only have one chapter posted. This is due to the fact Killua and Daniel are both twenty-five-year-old consenting adults, and it's also mainly, based on smut… so yeah.

Killua uses a human-designed dildo on himself next chapter.