Mirage

A/N: Tbh, my story is really stereotypic, and I find it hard to live up to your expectations because I'm a really crappy writer. The struggle is real, but I'm trying my best. Hope you still like this chapter though, and the future ones too.

Summary: Humanity's strongest soldier had secrets of his own. So when the woman he loved died, he turns on another for pure companionship and comfort. But a night of mistake has its consequences. Levihan.

CHAPTER THREE: CHOICE

The entire room was still with silence. A deafening one, to say the least.

The air around them was filled with tension as contemplations began to form in their minds, gathering coherent thoughts even though all rational arguments seemed to fall back and crumble.

Hange could feel his heated gaze on her, feel the weight of his eyes boring into her being. But she continues to look down to her feet as she waited for his inevitable response. Maybe she had miscalculated her actions and telling him sooner was a wrong idea, but hell, keeping it just to herself was terribly harder. She knew the truth would come out sooner or later.

Minutes seemed like hours as she patiently waited for his response, and she took the chance to mentally prepare herself for what he's going to say. A while later, Hange, who was leaning her back against the door, had somehow got tired of standing on two feet and decided to sit on his bed. She felt Levi move behind her and she looked over her shoulder to see what the man was up to. The man had indeed changed his position, from leaning against the wall and crossing his arms before his broad chest, his back was to her now as he stood before the window, gazing upon the dark sky. His jaw was tight and she could also see both his hands on his sides clenched into fists.

The sky was so beautiful tonight. Clouds moved discreetly into a wave of phantasm, allowing the silvery white moon to creep up from the darkness it was within. Enticing stars twinkled up the asphalt sky as if they were lights dancing.

A deep sigh escaped his lips, and he closed his eyes before turning to look at the woman. Their eyes met the moment he turned. He noticed the way her clouded glasses dangled on the tip of her nose. Despite the clouded look on her glasses, Levi saw her heated hazel brown eyes searching for his soul.

And there, with the simple look from her eyes, he remembered that it was certainly the same way she had looked at him that night as they had sex, no, as they made love. He had been with many women before, and he watched as they mewled and begged beneath him, their eyes shut as they moaned his name. But Hange was entirely different. With every thrust, every touch, every flick, her defiant eyes were open as her breath came in ragged pants.

Her eyes searched for his soul, just like what she was doing now. Stoic as he was, he could still feel it.

"Hange…" Levi finally spoke, his voice cracked even with just a single word. "I cannot promise everything," he breathed. His stance shifted. The Lance Corporal walked a few steps and stopped before the bed. "But if there's one thing that I can promise, it's that I can assure you that I will take full responsibility of the child and not deny it."

"I know you will," she half smiled the adjusted her glasses. "To be honest, I just came here to let you know that I am… indeed, p-pregnant," she struggled to say the word, as she herself wasn't even used to it. The word 'pregnant' hadn't even crossed her mind, maybe once or twice, but it was definitely an alien word to her.

Levi sat on the other side of the bed, facing her. "But are you having it?"

"Yes," the woman's answer was quick. "Yes, I'm having it. Whatever happens, this child will come to this world and live." She never doubted it for a moment. Never. The moment Dr. Thompson broke the news to her earlier, she wasn't ever hesitant about conceiving the child. With or without Levi accepting it, she'll deliver the tiny being into this world.

"We are at war, Hange. And you and I… We're both soldiers. Even if the whole pregnancy turned out fine, the world that the child will be living in is not a desirable place. Countless lives are lost in every mission that we go to. And believe me when I say that I still fear that the walls will someday be breached and those creatures will come to get us. I do not fear for myself. But I fear for the people."

Rare as it is to happen, his voice softened and the cold tone in it was less. Levi's words were considerate, Hange thought. And he was right with everything he said. This is a merciless world, governed by a ruler who desperately clutched on the idea that peace meant treating the people as mere pawns.

"Denying the child the right to live is probably the most selfish thing that I can do. Sure the world we live in is cruel. But there are still good things happening." Hange was on the brink of tears. She knew her façade is cracking, her mask is wearing off. But the man before is the only person who have actually seen the real her. "There is always hope, Levi."

"Maybe you're right. But as long as we don't achieve what we've wanted all along, hope is the only thing that we could have." Levi breathed sharply. "You're a fool, Hange. Always the impulsive fool."

"Are you implying that you don't want this child, Levi?" her voice came out harsh, and if he noticed the hint of pain in her voice, she didn't care. Hange stood up, her stance defiant as she prepared to leave. "Just like I told you, I just came here to tell you that I'm pregnant, and unless I'm able to reproduce asexually, I wouldn't confront you here right now. I just thought that as the father, you had the right to know. Whether you accept it or not, I'm having this child, Levi."

"Goddammit, Hange! That isn't what I meant!" Levi himself stood up and followed Hange to the door. He gripped her wrist and tried to pull her, but the woman kept tugging her arm. "I've told you I will take full responsibility of the child should you have it, but what I'm trying to say is that it's maybe better if you think through this first!"

"I have thought through it, and my decision is final." Her eyes was feral. She tugged her wrist once more, but the man's tight grip wouldn't come off. "You're hurting me. Let me go, Levi!"

His grip on her wrist loosened and silence once again engulfed them as they both stared at each other. The man has a defiant composure on his eyes and the woman had it, too. It was a battle of wills, a battle for words. But the rather conflicted argument had soon came to a sorry end as Hange made up her mind, and Levi knew that once the woman had formed a decision, there's no talking her out of it. The woman was stubborn and hardheaded.

"Just let me go, Levi. If there's someone who need to think here, it's not me, it's you." She tugged her wrist again and this time, he let go. Hange opened the door and without another glance at him, she slammed the door behind her. She scurried to her room, which was only a few steps down the hall from Levi's own quarters.

Hange's words echoed on Levi's now clashed mind. It wasn't as if he really didn't want the child. Hell, having children was the last thing on his mind, but even so, the thought of having a family, a wife and kids to go home to after a tiring mission, had crossed his mind so often. He isn't young anymore, but he's busy being humanity's strongest soldier and besides, giving glory to humanity is on the top of his priorities.

But yes, he thought of marrying a woman and having kids, forming a family.

But that woman is certainly not Hange Zoe. Not with her.

She is his comrade, a friend even, if having occasional banters with and keeping each other's backs in a mission is the meaning of friendship. He'd known her for more than five years, seen how she is during battle, was a witness of how messy she is everyday, or how she even contained hardly any decorum in herself. She was crazy, daft, and filthy.

And above all that, she is a woman, and human. She had feelings, too. And he had long admitted that what he did to her that night was not right, and he felt extremely sorry for it. But her pregnancy made things worse and complicated.

First off, they're both soldiers. Death is always chasing after them, through and through. What if something happens to her? Or to him, even if it seemed impossible, it can always happen. Second, Erwin will surely not let this go and they will receive some heavy punishment for this, even the Higher ups will not simply let this slip. Rumors will spread not only in the Survey Corps, but probably even in this whole goddamn place that they live in; inside the walls, too. Although he didn't really care about the latter, but he worried too much about the first. Menace. Danger.

Levi ran his fingers through his hair and closed his eyes.

Morning came so fast. The Lance Corporal awoke as the sunlight that filtered through his windows hit his eyes. He immediately got up from the bed and grabbed some clean clothes from his cabinet, and took a bath afterwards. While soaking in the hot steam of the shower, he let his mind wander, summoning rational thoughts and formulating his actions. His encounter with Hange last night had somehow kept him awake for hours, thinking about what he's going to do. He didn't know when he'd fallen asleep but he did remember some of the ideas he had last night.

First off, he's telling Erwin. And hopefully, Hange would join him as he talked to the Commander and explained everything.

Once he's finished bathing and already had some reasonable action to do, Levi slipped on his white shirt and pants, affixed his cravat, and arranged the maneuver gear on his body. He made sure that all straps were secured before heading out to seek Hange.

He went to her quarters and knocked. "Hange, it's Levi." No answer. He knocked again but there was still no response. Sighing in annoyance, the Lance Corporal turned the knob and opened the door.

The woman was not there. He searched for her in the bathroom but she was nowhere to be found.

The man snorted, then went out of the room, silently closing the door behind him. 'Shitty Glasses…Where the fuck are you?'

He headed for her lab but she still wasn't there. Instead, he found Moblit sitting in a corner, writing some notes. Levi cleared his voice. "Oi, Moblit. Have you seen your shitty Squad Leader anywhere?"

The man, who had somehow devoted his life to be by Hange's side as she purposefully studied the Titans, shook his head. "I'm afraid I haven't seen Squad Leader Hange yet. It's still quite early, Captain Levi. Maybe she's still in her room, Sir. And as I recall, she had been sick these days so I think she really needed the rest."

Levi simply nodded at Moblit, and took off. If he can't find Hange anywhere, he's telling Erwin himself. He walked hastily in the direction of Erwin's office, and soon reached it. As he neared the office, he noticed that the door was slightly ajar, and he heard faint voices inside. One was unmistakably Commander Erwin Smith, and the other was an infuriated woman… Hange Zoe.

"Hange, I've been hearing reports about you suddenly feeling sick in the middle of training. Are you sure you're fine?"

"I am, Erwin… I just lacked sleep, that's all."

"You've been pressing yourself too hard on your research again.'

Now is the chance, Levi thought. Without one second thought, he busted in the room, shocking the two talking inside. Erwin was sitting in his swivel chair before his large desk and Hange was sitting in one of the chairs. Both were staring in his direction, Erwin's face calm, and Hange's undefined.

"Levi, what is it that you want? I'm still talking to Hange here." The Commander crossed his eyebrows.

"Erwin, forgive my impertinence. But I need to talk to you about something." Levi started walking towards the two when Hange suddenly rose from her chair.

"If there is something Levi wants to talk about this urgent, then I'm leaving then. We can discuss the mission in another time. I'll see you later, Er-"

"No, you stay." Before Hange could even finish her sentence, Levi's cold voice cut her off. "Hange, we're telling him."

Hange's eyes widened in shock, and her body stayed frozen on her feet. Levi tugged her wrist and led her to sit on the chair again, to which she obliged.

"What are you telling me, Hange, Levi?" Erwin, despite noticing the tension between them, seemed to shrug it off as his face remained calm and composed.

Levi's jaw was tight and his both his hands were clenched into ball of fists. He inhaled sharply before starting to talk. "Hange is-"

"Erwin, I'm with Levi's child." This time, it was her turn to cut him off. Levi stared at her for a while, then turned to Erwin, who, despite the calm stance, has now a disbelieving expression on his face. "That explains my illness these past days. I'm pregnant."

There was silence in the office for a while. Erwin stood up from his chair and walked towards the windows, the finally broke the silence. "So what do you two plan to do about it?" his voice was calm and neutral. But his expression was mirrored on the window's glass, his eyebrows furrowed.

"Erwin, I'm having it." Hange looked up from her lap and stared at Levi, who was standing stiff on his feet. "With or without its father's acceptance, I'm having the baby."

"I see," the Commander sighed. "You do know the consequences. I never told any of you about relationships within the Corps, we never did forbid it here. But what we actually wanted to imply was that maturity is needed here. You may start romance, but whatever the consequences are, they're yours to endure. Levi, Hange, as veterans and high ranking officials of the Survey Corps, I expected a lot from you two."

"It was a mistake." Levi countered. "It was never meant to happen, Erwin."

"But it did happen, it's done. I'm sure if the Higher ups knew about this, they will not let this slip. If you've decided to keep the baby, both of you will be kicked out of the Survey Corps."

Hange turned to look at Erwin. "B-but they can't do that! Levi and I are both high ranking officers-"

"Who both displayed a sense of immaturity and irresponsibility beyond belief. You think the Higher ups will be considerate enough to still let you two in? They have no tolerance for this kind of thing. I thought you were sharper than that, Hange."

The woman stayed silent.

Erwin cleared his throat. "But you do have a choice."

This time, Levi was the one who spoke. "What choice are you talking about?"

"You can choose to get married and stay in the Corps."

Both Levi's and Hange's eyes widened. Their throats ran dry and an unfathomable feeling settled beneath them. Hange's heart hammered in her chest, and Levi, who was normally stoic and cold, had an undefined look on his face, his forehead sweating. Both were thinking hard, both were also sinking into an oasis of confusion.

"This is your only choice, Levi, Hange. You could choose to get married, everything else will just be on paper, and it's legal. You know how our nasty government works." Erwin uttered with his ever calm voice. "If you'll excuse me, I have a meeting with Zackly at 7. Just close the door of my office when you leave. Levi, I expect you to have the soldiers trained on the field today. And Hange, if you feel better, please hand me a report about the progress of your experiment on Eren Jaeger." The Commander gathered his things from his table and walked towards the door, but before he left, he glanced over his shoulder. "Think about it, both of you. That's your only choice."

Once the door closed, Levi started to pace around the room. If this was any other day, Hange would've laughed because the Lance Corporal was in such a mess, and she'd never seen him so confused and conflicted.

But this situation was different.

Hange pondered about the choice that Erwin told them about. It seems like it was the only hope they had left, if they ever decided to have the baby. But it was too much. Having someone be tied to another without the foundation of love is too much to handle. They had no feelings for each other, aside from the complicated 'friendship' they have. She would never let Levi be tied to her just like that.

She had to make up her mind. "Levi… If that's the only choice we have… We can just… Let the child go. Maybe it wasn't meant for us, besides, it was a mistake… It should never have happened… I-"

"What the hell are you saying?!" Levi gripped her shoulders. "Hange, I never for a second said that I didn't want this child that you are carrying. We'll have it, whatever it takes, we'll have the baby. Whatever happens, he or she will come to this world!" Levi said the words out loud, which made Hange wince a little.

"I just thought you didn't want it. It was a mistake. And with the way our conversation went last night, I really thought…"

"For fuck's sake, woman. You and your stupid assumptions." Levi bit his bottom lip. "I don't believe a thing about what Erwin said, because I'm sure none of the Higher ups will ever decide to kick us out. We're both assets of the Survey Corps, Hange. They will keep us no matter what. But right now, we need to play their cards."

"Well if that's the case, then you and I-"

"Yes. Hard as it is to do, I am marrying you, Hange Zoe."

A/N: I AM CRYING. I got carried along the writing process and I just typed whatever idea popped into my mind. But I really hope it turned out fine. Anyway, please feel free to give me a review! Oh, and it's okay if you don't like where the story is heading, and you can stop reading. I'm crappy anyway and I'm a mess too.