Stomach still queasy from her final broom flight, Ginny stumbled into someone's trunk as it barreled across Platform 9&3/4. Embarrassed, she mumbled a "sorry" to the owner, but her words were lost in the din. The bustle was overwhelming as families said their goodbyes and students flagged down old friends and house mates.

"-flu Ginny. Make sure- "

Her Mum's voice wafted in and out, as Ginny tried to focus. She had never been so disoriented on the platform before. On a certain level, Ginny knew this was supposed to be one of the happiest days of her life. A day she had dreamed about, planned, imagined countless times.

But she just couldn't feel it.

A yellow-tied Hogwarts student shoved past her, his foot catching on Ginny's shoe and leaving her with a bit of a limp where her heel had popped out.

"-don't eat it all at once. Save at least half- "

Students whooped as they caught up to beloved schoolmates. Hugs were exchanged, a tornado of squeals and yells swirled about Ginny, beckoning her to join the excitement. Normally, this much energy would tempt her with thrills and adventures.

Yet, as she limped across the platform, the sounds seemed to whip around her, but not touch her. They couldn't lift her out of her thoughts, they couldn't fan the embers of excitement she should, she knew she should, be feeling.

What was she to do? First years had to take flying class. What was she supposed to do during first year flying class?

"-did they go? Well, you find Ron and Harry- "

Would she have to go to the hospital wing? How many times could she skive off without people asking questions? What would people think? That she was deficient, cowardly? Weak stomached?

"Ginny? Are you alright?"

"What?" A bottom part of Ginny's plait whipped her in the face as her Mum startled her, and Ginny realized her Mum had been talking to her the whole time. And that was just another thing that felt… off. Somehow, Ginny knew she was missing it all.

Finally not left behind, and yet, behind all the same.

Her Mum was giving her the Are-You-Sure-You-Understand-What-I-Said face, and Ginny needed to give an answer. Her mouth flapped twice, but a part of her must have been listening, because she found herself muttering, "Right. Umm... find Ron?"

Mum was saying something again, her words mixing with the words of other mums saying other words to other students nearby.

"- if not, the twins went- "

The train started hissing steam, the wet heat from beneath making Ginny spring back. Was it time? Already? She couldn't see above all the taller students.

"-lots of friends to make- "

Her Dad's palms on her cheeks, smiling down at her, a glint of moisture in his eye. Why was her Dad tearing up? He didn't ride brooms.

"-so proud of you- "

Oh, Merlin. It hit her, suddenly, like a Quaffle to the face. She was leaving her Mum's off-key humming while making breakfast. She was leaving her Dad's pinch-her-nose-and-kiss-her-on-the-forehead when he left for work every morning.

When was the next time someone would kiss her on the forehead? Her brothers never kissed her on the forehead-

"-be brilliant- "

The whistle shrieked and Ginny's slight frame was clenched into hugs she couldn't feel. A final cacophony of hooting owls and hissing cats and clanking cages reached a crescendo as Ginny was swept up into the train, riding the tide of students, unable to break from the flow.

Others pushed past her, as they chatted and squealed and found their lifelong friends - the friends one was supposed to make on the train to Hogwarts. Feeling like everyone else was already so beyond her, it seemed to Ginny that Hogwarts was happening all around her, surrounding her, like she was caught up in a maelstrom and being batted about, instead of... instead of….

"Follow the instructions," she whispered to herself, gripping her satchel close to her chest, trying to stay out of everyone's way as the much taller and broader students pushed past. She had wanted this! She had wanted this forever! She wasn't… she wasn't… "just, follow the instructions," she said again.

Follow the instructions. She was… was supposed to sit with Ron and Harry. Where were Ron and Harry?

Moving down the aisle, still being pulled by the current, Ginny moved faster and faster. She peeked through compartment windows. But each glance that failed to produce the sight of Ron's red head, made Ginny's insides clench, until she felt again the memory of being on a broom.

With a rising sense of panic, Ginny pushed her nose up against each compartment window, frantically searching for Ron. She had a moment of hope, her heart leaping in relief when she spied double flashes of ginger. She was on the verge of yanking the door open and crying out in relief, when she realized one of those flashes of ginger was snogging a girl. A girl whose face Ginny couldn't see because Fred was eating it.

Oh, Merlin, that had been her second instruction. Ginny felt a rising sense of panic. Find Ron or find the twins. But another girl was pitching Every Flavor Beans into George's mouth as if he were a garden gnome she needed to bribe to get into a broom shed, and Ginny couldn't sit in there, even if they wanted her to, because it was so gross it was making her stomach sick again.

At the thought, Ginny spun away from the window. Her gaze darted left and right; she didn't know what to do or where to go. The aisle was practically empty now, cleared out as more and more people found places to sit.

She was supposed to be with her brothers! Percy? She should find Percy? In a panic, Ginny darted to the front of the train, her eyes sliding across the tiny gold numbered plates on the doors until she found one labeled "Prefect Car."

Before her knuckles could rap on the prefect door, Percy stuck his head out the threshold. "I'm in a very important Prefect meeting. You need to go take your seat; the train is about to depart."

The sliding door slammed closed at the exact moment the train lurched to a start. Ginny staggered backward into the paneled corridor, her feet unaccustomed to the vibrating floor. She bumped back and forth as she traversed the train two more times searching for Ron, before she forced herself to face a horrible truth.

Had Ron ditched her? Was she so embarrassing or awful, that he would hide from her, rather than sit with her on her first train ride?

The train tilted and she fell into the wall again. Bumped and bruised, she couldn't remember the other instruction. Something something brilliant? No, um, friends? Make friends? Ginny abandoned the idea of finding Ron, and instead looked for a car with some kids around her age.

But the fun-filled cars with games of exploding snap and laughing kids were packed full. After opening the third door to a reply of "too full in here!" or "No room!" it was with a sinking feeling, Ginny realized everyone had already settled in.

Dejected, Ginny walked away from the cars filled with the kind of raucous merriment she had hoped for. Instead, she finally found a free seat in a silent car towards the back. With a tentative push, she opened the door only to be overwhelmed with the scent of stale smoke.

Sprawled across one seat, a plump boy napped, completely unaware of her entrance. "Lifelong friends," Ginny whispered. Lifelong friends were made on the train to Hogwarts. Ginny debated for a moment, but desperate for company, she decided to take a chance and she poked him awake.

"Whuh? What?"

Absolutely determined to make a friend- any friend- she sprang to attention, pasting an overly cheerful smile on her face. She waved at the yawning, blinking boy and blurted, "Hi! I'm Ginny and this is going to be my first year at Hogwarts. What's your name?"

The boy stared at her, then wiped a bit of sleep drool from his mouth. Without a word, he pulled a set of robes out of his bag. Turning his back to her, he tossed the robes over his head, lay sideways on the bench and, judging by the snores a moment later, fell back to sleep.

And just like that, the day had dished one too many disappointments for Ginny.

Defeated, she sagged back in her seat. After a moment, she realized she still had her heavy satchel over her shoulder, and it was beginning to ache. Feeling as if she were growing new, aching bones all over again, she lowered her satchel onto the floor. It fell with a clunk that rumbled over the softer sounds of the chugging train, but it didn't wake the snoring boy.

Ginny pulled her knees up under her chin, absently adjusting her shoe to cover her heel again. She had never thought, when she was young and watching her brothers board the bright red train, it would have been so cold. Shivering, she huddled next to the window, staring as the city raced by faster, and faster.

It wasn't the right kind of fast, though, she thought. Not like a broom, fast.

On a whizzing broom, a witch could control the wheres and whens and how fasts. A train was different. Trapped in a tube shuffling a witch from point A to point B. No decisions to be made, nothing to do but sit and wait. She couldn't even stop and look at something that caught her interest. It would just coast by, the moment lost in a blink.

Trains were awful. Why had she ever thought that taking a train to school would be an adventure?

Sometime in the second hour Ginny unfolded her stiff limbs. Reaching into her satchel for her lunch, she paused as her hand brushed against a book.

Confused, Ginny pulled it out, running her fingers over the tattered cover. The spine crackled as she opened it to see fresh, blank pages.

Oh. Her lip began to quiver a bit, as she sat in the silence of the compartment. Her Dad must have put it there. Had she told him she was out of journal pages? All the lists of questions to ask Harry Potter, the follow ups, the ideas that just hadn't worked had spent all the pages. Surely, she must have told her Dad.

Her Mum may have packed her a sandwich, but it was just like Dad to find something for her that, if not new, was exactly what she needed. Just when she needed it most.

It was like an invisible hug from home. A kiss on the forehead, an affectionate pinch on her nose.

With warm love in her heart, Ginny drew a quill from her bag and began to write on the cool, crisp page.

I thought it would be different, the train to Hogwarts.

()()()

()()()

Ginny yanked the hat off her head. Her new Head of House pursed her lips, and gestured Ginny to the Gryffindor table.

Ginny was still walking down the center aisle when Professor Dumbledore's voice rang from the podium behind her. "That took some time, so without further ado, tuck in!"

Groans and sighs of relief echoed through the hall. An occasional "finally," and a few "thought I'd starve to deaths" could be heard over the general cacophony.

Ginny's eyes frantically searched the crowded Gryffindor table for a spot she could squeeze into.

"Took forever!" a loud female voice drifted from the Hufflepuff table.

"It's the worst when it's the last one. What was that last one? A 'W'?"

Ginny scanned the table. No Ron, no Harry. She had never found them on the train either, maybe they hadn't ditched her? Had something happened to them? Percy didn't look nervous, though, smashed between two other prefects. Squeezed, really. No room next to Percy. Her eyes flew down the table, searching for a few inches, anything, anything.

"Of course," a snotty voice drawled from the Slytherin table. "It would be a Weasley who finally broke that threadbare hat." Ginny jerked in alarm, recognizing that voice from Flourish and Blotts.

"She looks like a house elf," laughed another in reply. "Maybe that ratty hat was flirting with her ratty robes and didn't want to stop."

Ginny ducked her head and walked faster down the aisle. She barreled forward until she realized she had gotten to the end of the table without finding a place to sit.

"Seven minutes!" She stumbled backward as a ghost swooped up from the floor beneath her, his head wobbling on his shoulders.

Ginny gulped, but realized this was the Gryffindor house ghost her brothers told her about. Somewhat desperately, she stammered. "Hello! My name is Ginny, and I- "

"Seven whole minutes of hatstall!" The ghost chortled into her face. "Not a record, of course, but the longest this year! Tell me, which house was it waffling towards? We house ghosts keep a running tally!"

"Well, it was more…"

"Oh, there's the Friar!" The ghost waved his translucent hands in the air. He called over the din. "Seven minutes! Did you see?" Without another word to Ginny, the ghost soared through the table to gloat over the Hufflepuff ghost.

Picking at her wrists, Ginny stood awkwardly at the end of the aisle while everyone around her ate and laughed and… and…

Spying about six inches of space at the very end of the bench, Ginny sidled in, accidentally bumping into the older Gryffindor next to her. "I'm sorry, excuse me," she muttered, stuffing her satchel under her feet.

The older girl glanced at her. "Oh, it's fine."

A place setting magically appeared in front of Ginny, but there was so little room the goblet clattered to the floor.

The four Gryffindor nearest her, turned to stare.

Ginny glanced down at the gold cup and stammered, "S-sorry. Um…" Realizing she was making the World's Worst First Impression, Ginny desperately yanked the last bits of her bravery to her chest, "Hello. I'm… my name is Ginny?"

Oh no, why did that sound like a question?

"I'm Ginny," she said more firmly, though she hated the fact her voice wobbled. "Ginny Weas- "

One of the Gryffindor across from her was hit in the head by a flying biscuit. The girl and boy across from her laughed, and the boy leaned over to kiss the girl's cheek.

Ginny glanced down at her plate, which magically filled with food she didn't recognize. It had far more sauce than her Mum used, though it did smell good.

Or would have, except her stomach was churning, and she didn't have any appetite. Sometimes her stomach felt bad all day when she failed at the broom…

…but thinking of brooms made Ginny's heart clench, as if something was squeezing it and it would never beat normally again.

Ginny cleared her mind, her hand drifting to her fork. With a limp grip, she pushed her fork at her food and pretended to be quite interested in the conversation around her. But it was filled with talk about last year's OWLs and curfews and things Ginny really didn't know about.

She must look so pathetic, not having anyone to talk to. Not having…

Ginny glanced at the imposing doors and wondered how long they had to stay here. Not even knowing where she could possibly go to get away.

She didn't belong here. The hat hadn't even really wanted to put her in Gryffindor…

Unable to bear it anymore, Ginny lurched down under the table. Figuring it was better to look busy instead of awkward, she yanked open her satchel, and fished out her diary and quill.

Pushing her plate out of the way, she found the page where she left off and began to write.

I have no one to talk with.

()()()

()()()

Ginny entered the dormitory alone.

Two new trunks were at the foot of two beds. Freshly painted a glossy black, they shined in the light.

Her own battered trunk, which was once Bill's, was at the foot of the third bed.

Only three in her year. Fred and George were in a room with five, as was Ron. Although she seemed to remember Charlie had said he had three roommates, usually there were more. Ginny supposed it made sense that each year would have a different amount. No one could ensure students were evenly sorted between the four houses.

With a numb sense of obligation, she began to unpack her spare set of robes.

"-that is so… Gryffindor!" Ginny heard voices on the stairs before the door slammed open and two giggling girls entered.

Ginny pasted on a shaky smile.

"-flew a muggle automobile all the way up from London!"

Oh.

"I heard one of them was Harry Potter. THE Harry Potter."

Her smile wobbled a bit. But Ginny lifted her hand. "Hello, I'm Gin- "

"Oh, hi," one waved back, a blonde girl who was about three inches taller than Ginny and outweighed her by a stone.

Ginny watched the girl's gaze dart down to the edge of Ginny's faded robes. Ginny realized they did have a rather worn look, without the crisp edges of the girl's inky black ones.

"Ohh! I love the pillows!" The other girl squealed. The two girls leaped onto their beds and bounced on them, chatting about the dinner and the gossip…

Ginny felt her heart go flat.

They were already fast friends. Best friends, probably.

Feeling more and more uncomfortable with every passing moment, Ginny put on her nightclothes. Then, she closed the curtains around her bed, and fished out a piece of parchment and her quill.

She had promised to write her parents.

But she could only stare at the blank parchment.

What on earth could she say to them? What could she say that wouldn't worry them, or embarrass them or…

With a shaking hand, Ginny folded up the parchment. Putting it aside, she pulled out her diary.

But to Ginny's surprise, what she had written before was now gone. The pages were blank.

Well, mostly blank. Right there, in handwriting not her own, was a small, neatly written message.

Hello.

Her hand crept toward her quill. Ginny peered at the writing, her heart leaping in hope, even as her fingers shook.

Slowly, Ginny scratched a reply.

Hello. I'm Ginny.

It's nice to meet you, Ginny. My name is Tom.

()()()

()()()