Woop-de-freaking-do, I'm a procrastinator. This took an immensely long time force myself to write, due to things like homework and RobRae and Tumblr but, yeah, I got around to it. Here ya go, the filler chappie!
Chapter Four: How Very Embarrassing
Tai Lung followed Shifu dismally and all the while thought of insanely illogical escape routes. He was, however, also intent on making sure his abused finger had suffered no harm from it's time in the Wuxi move, so of course he didn't act on any. He prodded, cracked, rotated and rubbed the digit in an almost paranoid fashion, and in paying so much attention to it's care he didn't really notice what the rest of his body was doing until it smacked into a pillar.
Shifu didn't know whether to scowl or smirk.
"Pay attention, cat," he went for a scowl, fiddling with his flute behind his back. The calming twitches and sweeps of the instrument set a calmer pace to his mind and he tilted his head toward the door in front of them. "Well, go on then."
Still wincing, Tai Lung stumbled up to the doors clumsily and stepped inside, barely taking note of his surroundings. His head needed to be nursed first, then his curiosity.
Logic betrayed him as soon as he heard the first yells and crashes of battle.
His head jerked up immediately, followed by a weak gasp.
"Ki-yah!"
THUD
CRASH
"Heis!" "Hahh!"
crAACK
"You brought me to the Training Hall?" he frowned to himself. "Of course you did."
"Yes, if you are to begin training, one must do so...in a training-related area." Shifu chuckled from behind him.
"Ow," Tai Lung muttered in awed sympathy, watching the Furious Five gloriously destroy and dodge the mechanisms, dummies, and wooden obstacles of the court.
He scanned the entire move, gawking at the moving floor snaking and weaving treacherously, while the Masters' feet merely skimmed over it with practiced, fluent routines. Well, except for Viper, but she made up for it double, lacing through spouts of fire so that all he caught were slivers of graceful green. Tai shifted his glance over to the Wooden Warriors and the bug shrieking through them at unimaginable speed, both in the literal and metaphorical sense. Then up to Monkey, flipping dangerously close to the spikes of the seven-taloned rings. Crane's firm and yet agile form twisted and deflected its way through the arrows before he swept down the Jade Tortoise and joined the primate Master in a sparring match.
Fierce growls of exclamation brought Tai Lung's attention to the black and white bear ripping his way furiously through the Clubs of Oblivion, his movements sharp, hard and defined. Unlike the others, his moves were focused on sturdiness and not nimbleness, so with every balanced paw step or strike, he seemed to be a wall of solid oncoming rock. Said rock was blocking and ducking in severely tight spaces through the swinging, clawed clubs, until it let out a roar and smashed it's fists against one of them. Wood sprayed in chunks toward every corner of the room, including Tai's.
He didn't even have time to look surprised.
It thwacked him on the head with no mercy and left him with a ringing headache and a short gasp for air. Tears nearly stung through the feline's amber eyes but he forced them away with the thought of looking weak in front of those who already thought him weaker.
"Now I get why you were standing behind me," he hissed out towards the red panda's direction, rubbing his palm over his spotted head. The pain had quickly dulled, but when Tai Lung glanced up he caught a flicker of burning fire in the green eyes of Master Panda.
It was on purpose, his paranoid self grumbled, The panda did it on purpose. Or maybe I just got hit that hard.
Tai shoved the thoughts away and ignored the little bump on his forehead growing faster than bamboo by the second. "Good show," he smirked amiably, nodding at Shifu before crossing his arms stoically.
"Your turn," The evil little red-and-white mouse lifted his lips in a satanic smile. He prodded the cat with his flute unceremoniously, the flute's sharp edge digging into the spotted feline's back. "Go."
"Hey, woAH! Wait!" Tai screeched, flailing his arms around for unrelieved balance. "I-I can't start out with something like this! I need..I need a warm-up!" he yelped as he caught himself on the edge. A club of oblivion sailed gleefully past his whiskers.
He let out a relieved gust of pent-up air when nothing appeared damaged. His fingers rubbed nervously against the planks of savior wood in front of his snout all while he pretended to not hear Master Mantis mutter, "That was our warm-up."
Watching him scramble unsteadily to his feet, Shifu cleared his throat. "Well, go on, cat. Warm yourself up, then."
Tai Lung rubbed his paws together nervously. His amber eyes scanned the area before widening gratefully at the sight of a savior. "Umm...what about a warm-up...for a warm-up?"
"What do you mean?" The Five and their Master followed his excited gaze towards a lone, inflatable training dummy in the corner. "Oh, you mean with that bear dummy?"
No, I mean the black-and-white one standing beside you, mouse. A snarky voice tempted to leak out of Tai's pursed lips, but he swallowed it like a bitter pill. "Yeah. That one." It looked a lot friendlier than the Torture-I mean, Training, Hall, at least.
"We use that for training the children, and propping the door open when it's hot," Shifu glanced back and forth between the two distastefully, "But if you insist…"
Tai Lung made an over-dramatic show of sauntering over to his adversary, cracking his scrawny knuckles. Ignoring the Masters gathering around him was incredibly hard. He only managed to bow out of impulsive respect.
The leopard turned away from their suppressed, scornful looks and rolled his shoulders in preparation. Instinctively, he overanalyzed things-out loud.
"So...should I hit it to the side of front-style? Soft or hard? Maybe a kick to the bottom of it would be more affective? Or if I just head-butted it-"
"Would you hit. It." Shifu interrupted, miffed.
Tai Lung whipped around, remembering he had an audience. "Oh. Uh. Sorry. Just, y'know, thinking aloud-"
"Hit it, cat."
The feline grunted sheepishly, "Alright, lemme see what you've got." And gave it a tentative punch on it's dumb, smiling face. It wobbled backwards from the shy impact, the plastic making a comical boing sound, then shifted forward lazily.
"Nope, shoulda gone with a kick." He nodded to himself, narrowed his eyes, then proceeded to lash out with a hearty palm strike. The dummy bent over nearly horizontal to the floor from impact, the plastic shuddering from his touch. "Aha!"
Tai raised his fists in victory, then realized that victory was to be short-lived when a smiling rubber face bounced back up to meet him and promptly knocked him off his feet; he cried out in unsuspecting pain and watched a lone tooth, probably his and not the dummy's, rocket out towards the floor as he sailed away from it. Up, up and away, then down, down aND HOLY BEAN BUNS THE TRAINING ARENA WAS FOUR INCHES FROM HIS NOSE.
The Five reached forward to assist, but Shifu held his flute out in front of them haltingly. They stepped back in confusion, but nevertheless obedient confusion, and watched as the spotted villager landed miraculously on two feet.
That, however, was the only miraculous happening.
Tai Lung felt the ground shift and twist beneath his paw pads, bewildering his balance and eyesight. The floor was a blur of wooden snakes, the air whistled with 50-pound chained maces, and he desperately wanted nothing but to be a boring waiter.
His body went into panicked-adrenaline mode, making up for what his brain could not. He twisted and shouted and pleaded for mercy, clawed at any solid surface and got so many bruises he felt like one giant wound. The Swinging Clubs of Oblivion, like the absolute hard-headed things they were, deafened themselves to his pleas and zig-zagged past his fur. They missed the scrambling, disoriented cat only by sheer chance.
That was, until one got lucky. And smacked him across the arena into the Jade Tortoise Bowl.
"This will be easier than I thought," chuckled Shifu.
Our terrified kitty-poo's head rattled as gravity tossed him around the half-shell carelessly, his fur bristling, bones and skin bumping roughly on the smooth sides. "Feeling a little..hrrk...dizzy.." he announced. His words came out in a jumbled slur.
Tai Lung shook his head and spilled out of the bowl, his incoherent feet not knowing where to go. Unfortunately, they led him right into the place he did not want to enter.
The Gauntlet of Wooden Warriors.
"Ow! OOH-These are HA-ARD." Tai moaned. He tried to hang on to any paw-hold he could find, but the arms of the spiked wooden dummies just whipped around at the slightest touch. They rotated from any momentum and sent him flailing forward. "I-I think I'm gonna.."
His sensitive ears heard the gears turning in the machinery, triggering the rapid response of the wooden army, but it wasn't until he finally teetered into a tiny path devoid of evil wooden spiky things that he could catch his breath. The cat gasped out anxiously, his eyes stinging and limbs numb from pain. "Ow...ow..ow…" He grasped forward to lean onto something, momentarily letting his brain dull out of common sense, and the result? The metal, wooden apparatus whapped him right in the place no man wants to be hit.
And everything went still.
Tai's cheeks puffed out in repressed agony, a whining hiss slipping from his gritted teeth. If he doubted that his eyes were stinging before, he had no doubt now.
"...aow?"
Everyone watching winced in sympathy, save Shifu. He watched and waited.
The cat inhaled sharply, his throat dry, and somehow managed to refrain from an undignified mewling session. He inched forward, slowly; and was once again thrown into a mayhem of punishing wooden warriors.
Every hit sparked a new bout of hurt, the hooked claws of the dummies digging into his fur and breaking skin. He was pummeled unwillingly forward and, amidst weak protest, was dumped into the Field of Fiery Death.
For a few instantaneous, horrible seconds, everything was flashes of red and orange. Tai shrieked his way through, weaving in stupid dance patterns he had been forced to memorize in school, just trying to evade the flames in any desperate way possible, until he was spinning in a mortified frenzy, arms tucked close to his sides. He dashed one way and dodged to the other, legs skimming the black, singed floor. For a moment, he thought he would actually make it. He grinned half-heartedly. He could dance his way out of this!
Then a loud bark of, "Finish already, you buffon!" and Tai's instincts ran and hid. His mind went a lovely blank color, and the flames all spurted up in a wave. So much for Mrs. Gau's dance classes.
Coughing, Tai crawled his way onto the floor. As if to mock him, he'd landed once more and seemingly steady feet, then collapsed.
Shifu smirked at him, bending over to pinch the sneaky flame alighting the fur on the tip of his head. "Well. Are you ready for the real warm-up now?"
Tai Lung let his face fall to the floor with a groan.
"There are no words,"
Mantis hopped up the stairs and onto a nearby boulder. He paused to wait for his friends as they clambered up the outside path to the Student Barracks and nodded at Crane's agreeing statement, "No denying that."
"Not to be disrespectful, but I don't understand what Oogway was thinking," Viper slithered up next to the bird. "The poor guy's gonna get himself killed!"
"He is so...mighty!" Crane mocked sarcastically and gestured with his wings, "Fell from the balcony, in a blur of silver!"
"When he roars, the very ground shakes!" Mantis added, guffawing.
Viper held back a naughty giggle and instead glared at them, "Hey, back down on him. It's not like it's his fault."
"Why do you care, anyway, Vi?" Crane grunted, him and the rest following her up the darkening path, "He's just a villager that's just gonna give up sooner or later,"
"And I'm opting for later," Monkey swung up ahead.
"You would think," Panda scowled, interrupting his comrade's laughter and silencing them all, "That Oogway would choose someone who at least knew Kung Fu."
"Or someone who could pick up a weight."
"Or at least jump over a weight."
The boys grinned at their wise-cracking, but Viper shook her head sympathetically. "Look, just because he seems like he won't be able to do doesn't mean that…" she cut off her sentence and sighed at the perplexed glances she received. "Nevermind."
"Aw, c'mon Viper," Mantis skittered to her side, "Don't worry about him. I'm sure Shifu will pay for the medical bills."
The cheering joke was lost on the snake, but she offered a small smile and followed the boys into the barrack's.
Behind them, Tai Lung shuffled forward uneasily, lowering his eyes to his paws and sighing, dejected. He'd heard everything, unbeknownst to the Five. And wished his stupid feline ears weren't as well-tuned as they were.
It wasn't his fault. Ha. At least Master Viper was a little less dense. Quite the change from Master Panda.
Sighing through his bruised, blood-crusted nose, he slumped over and let the words ring through his ears all the way up the stairs to the bunkhouse.
ssQUEEAAK.
Tai Lung winced at the low moan of the wood beneath his tip-toeing feet. It wasn't like he was over 130 pounds, yeesh.
"Sensitive, aren't you?" he scowled, tip-toeing towards a nearby room as quickly as he could.
Squeak.
"Shut up,"
Squeeeaalk.
Tai pursed his lips and leaned to the side against a paper door for a quick rest since his arms, beaten and sore, still needed rest-and found himself tripping insead a bedroom.
A loud hiss of surprise answered his unasked question.
He was in Viper's bedroom.
The feline glanced up from where he'd fallen and smiled out of the corner of his mouth in a silent plea for mercy.
"Forgive me, Master Viper," he hefted himself up but only succeeded in falling back down again. "S-sorry. I didn't mean to intrude, I...I was just…"
Viper slowly uncoiled herself, tilted her head to one side to weigh her options. To help or not to help?
Why was she even asking herself?
The snake ribboned her way off her mat immediately and helped the spotted cat up to his paws with a quick, gravity-defying trick. Tai Lung really couldn't decipher what she'd done, exactly, but all he knew was that he was back up on two feet again. He looked down at the docile serpent and offered her a haggard smile and weak bow of gratitude. "Thanks."
"It's what any decent person would of done." She hopped back onto her bed and curled up. Her blue eyes looked over him in pity. "I'm sorry about-"
"Nah, don't worry about it," He shrugged it off quickly, then realized that it might of been too quick. "I don't mean to be rude, or anything. Sorry, I meant-"
Viper laughed quietly. "It's fine...um…"
"Tai Lung Ping." Tai nodded, stepping backwards to exit. "Ping's the last name, Tai and Lung are the first. No middle, hah. Just...they're together. Stuck. I mean-"
"Don't worry, I get it, Tai Lung," She dipped her head down in a bow. "Nice to meet you."
A sudden warm feeling washed over the feline; a little happy spark that reassured him that not all the Masters hated him. "Thanks," he breathed out, kinda shocked and kinda sincere and kinda unsure of what he was saying. "It..it's really nice to meet you to, Master Viper." And before he could hold it back, he blurted out, "You and the Five are so cool."
Viper blinked. Tai Lung's face flushed in self-anger and embarrassment. "Sorry! No disrespect intended, I swear."
The snake brushed off the comment and seemed to search through his face, studying. "Today, in the Training Hall. Did things seem blurry?"
"Well, uhm." Tai Lung scratched the back of his aching neck. "Yeah, I guess. I mean, it was going really fast and-"
"No, nevermind. Can I ask you another question?"
"Of..of course."
"Are you ever not able to...see well, at least, things very close to your face?"
Tai Lung cocked his head in surprise. "How'd you know that?"
"The way you were in the Training Hall today." Viper slid over to a nearby dresser and pulled out a funny-looking object that Tai Lung wasn't very familiar with. "You seemed to notice things well enough when they were far away but when stuff got really close to you, you didn't know where to duck. Trust me, I'd know a farsighted person from a long ways away. Crane had that problem, but then Oogway fixed him up. But before that-"
She smiled and held up the object, "He used these."
"What are they?" Tai Lung's nose scrunched up as he leaned forward to get a better look.
Viper giggled, "Glasses!"
"Never heard of them. Oh, wait, aren't they those little glass eye-patches that rich people wear?"
"Well, yes," the snake looked up. "I don't know if they'll work as well on you as they did on Crane, but it's worth a try." She plopped the 'eye-patches' onto the bridge of his nose and caused Tai to skew his mouth to one side, his nose wiggling at the foreign thing in suspicion.
Viper hid a laugh and straightened out the glasses with the tip of her tail. "Alright, Tai Lung. Can you see any better?"
"Woah!" his eyes wandered over her back, rawly shocked. "You've got tattoos!"
The female snake Master nodded. "Yes, I do,"
Tai Lung smiled sheepishly and mumbled in a low voice. "That's cool." He looked to the floor awkwardly. "A-and, I guess that means they work. Maybe Mantis won't be a fuzzy blur next time I see him. Thanks."
Viper's laughter was soft for someone so much more superior than him. "You're welcome."
The spotted feline rubbed the mane running down his neck, and he decided that Viper was a very nice person, and possibly the only one, in this entire place. "I better get going," he backed out and pushed the door open behind him. He suddenly stopped, his curiosity suddenly overwhelming.
"Why are you being so...sweet?" Tai Lung stammered. "You could of been the Dragon Warrior yourself. Why are you being nice to me?"
"Oh, please," Viper's eyes narrowed teasingly, "We all know Master Panda would have won. Besides," she shrugged in a snake-like way and answered simply, "It's what any decent person would do."
Tai Lung knew there was more behind that, but for once he bit it back after a second thought. "Well, so far, you're the only decent person here-y'know, no disrespect and stuff-"
"Tai Lung, you're fine. I understand the others can be a bit...brash at times. But they'll warm up to you." Viper coiled herself in a meditative state and glanced back up at him furtively. "And you know what? I think you will too."
You make it sound as if I'm staying here, he sighed internally, but nodded at her a brief "Thanks. Goodnight." instead.
The leopard closed the door and sighed once more at his disappointing thoughts, but before he could wallow too deep in despair, double doors opened a few feet away and out stepped Master Panda.
His face was cold and hard-edged, a contrast with the milky moonlight. "What are you doing?"
"Uh. I. Uh. I'm looking for a place to sleep?" Tai Lung shrugged.
"Why were you with Viper?"
Tai Lung's eyes widened. "She was only giving me these," he snatched off the glasses and dangled them between his fingers. "Nothing else, I swear."
A quick flash of bewilderment crossed through the bear's face before he shook his head. "There's a curfew, cat. Don't break it."
"I-I won't." Tai Lung slipped his glasses back on.
The bear crossed his arms and stood across the room, eyes stone-hard and brutally analytical. "You might think," he growled slowly, "That just because one of us accepts you that we all can magically start being friends. But we both know the truth."
He leaned forward menacingly. "You don't, and will never, belong here. You are a disgrace to Kung Fu and everything in its name, and if you have any respect for who we are, and what we do? You will be gone, by morning."
Panda let his words sink in. With a final once-over, he slipped back into his room and left the leopard with downcast eyes and a heavy heart.
Or...or was he really that willing to believe that?
"I don't need to be friends with anyone," Tai Lung scowled and marched into an empty bedroom, closing the door behind him. His amber eyes were fierce.
"I'll prove him wrong tomorrow."
And there you have it! Make sure to point out any errors if there are any to be found. Also, please leave a review if you have the time. Thanks for reading!
Until next time,
Alons-y!
-DOTS