As always, thank you so much for the kind words on the last chapter. I'm so sorry for the pause between updates. Hopefully Covid numbers will start improving and I won't be working a million double shifts at the hospital like I have been. :) Thank you all for reading!

Chapter 22

Vin took off his hat, running a hand over his hair before shoving his hat back down on his head. He came down the steps from the upstairs rooms, his mind already racing. Lucy hadn't been in any of the places he had looked between the livery and the saloon. She wasn't with Chris when Vin had seen him coming back from the church. And her room was empty.

He saw Inez watching him from behind the bar and changed course, heading toward her.

"Vin," she greeted him calmly.

Vin felt anything but calm. He glanced around the saloon again, as if his sister would just pull up a chair and have a drink and he may have missed her.

"Lucy's missin'," Vin said, getting to the point. He'd let Inez know, then get the other men roused from their drinks and card games, go fetch JD from the jail where he was no doubt baby-sitting the ranch hands who had set this morning in motion with their gunshots.

"She's not," Inez said.

Vin stopped moving toward the others. He looked back at Inez.

Whatever she was about to say was interrupted by Chris coming into the saloon.

Inez saw him starting toward the stairs and stopped him with a word.

"She's here," Inez said. She poured two drinks and set them on the counter.

Vin and Chris ignored the drinks.

"She's in the kitchen," Inez said. "But you cannot—"

Whatever she intended to say, holding up a hand like she would stop them from going into the kitchen for some reason, Vin didn't hear. He thanked her with a nod of his head and moved around her, Inez moving like she wanted to block him, but that didn't make any sense.

As soon as he was in the kitchen, the heat hit him. Hot water steamed for washing dishes and the oven was clearly well stoked, radiating heat as Lucy opened the door and used a towel wrapped around her hand to pull a pan of cookies from the oven.

"Lucy," Vin said.

She jumped, her pan clattering to the wooden counter as she dropped it and whirled around.

Vin had been expecting the reaction and he hated that he expected that. Hated that Lucy had been abused to the point of being skittish at any approach.

"I"ve been lookin' everywhere for you," Vin said, no recrimination in his words. Lucy still looked chastened. Vin held back a sigh, not sure what he was supposed to do, or say to make things work with his sister.

"You ok?" came Chris' voice behind him.

Lucy looked over Vin's shoulder and gave a slight nod.

"What happened?" Vin asked, bewildered at the sight of her in the saloon kitchen, baking cookies. How she had managed to go from terrified at the sound of gunshots to baking was a mystery to him. "You didn't have to run from the shots. I—we—would never let anyone hurt you." Vin needed her to know that. Needed her to believe it.

Lucy's face wrinkled in…annoyance? But then she pressed her lips together and looked down at the floor.

"I'm sorry," Lucy said.

"You don't need to apologize," Vin said, his anger at what Eli Joe had reduced his sister to coming through his words. Lucy flinched and Vin dragged his hand over his face, not sure how he was supposed to reach Lucy.

"Give her some space," Chris muttered.

Vin tensed. He turned and glared at Chris. The man who seemed to be getting close to his sister who was in no place to deal with the attentions of a man.

Chris held his glare.

"I didn't run because of the shots," Lucy burst out.

Vin and Chris both turned to look at her. She put her hand to her lips like she wanted to take back her sudden outburst. But her brows stayed knit in clear annoyance.

"Then what?" Vin asked, wanting to understand just one thing about his sister. Anything. He wanted anything to make sense.

Lucy bit her lips and Vin didn't think she was going to answer. But then she spoke, quietly, but clearly frustrated. "I don't want to listen to the two of you bicker." She darted a look to Vin, her eyes moving to Chris before looking at the floor.

"Bicker?" Vin asked. Bickering was what old ladies did. Maybe some of the fops back east. He and Chris didn't…bicker.

"I'm sorry," Lucy said. "I'm sorry," she repeated, shaking her head, her entire expression falling. "I shouldn't—shouldn't have—I—You shouldn't be at odds with each other over—over me."

"Nah, Lucy," Vin said, a heavy sigh dragging out of him. He took a step towards her before stopping, opting to not make her feel cornered. "We ain't…arguing. We just…" He sighed again. "I'm the one who's sorry. I didn't mean to upset you none."

Lucy lifted uncertain eyes to him.

Vin tried to dredge up a smile for her. He saw her eyes move over his shoulder again. Vin looked back and saw Chris give Lucy a slight nod. He didn't miss the slight sigh of relief from Lucy when she was assured neither one of them was upset with her, though she still looked on edge with the two of them.

"I'll leave the two of you," Chris said, started to back out of the door.

Lucy looked between the two of them, but didn't say anything to Chris.

Chris left and Vin looked over at the cookies. "Ezra planning to start a bakery?" he asked, wanting to give Lucy a chance to find more solid footing after he and Chris had messed up so badly.

Lucy's lips moved in the hint of a smile. "They're just a thank you for Ezra," she said.

"Lucky Ezra," Vin said.

Lucy handed him one of the still warm cookies and Vin took it, seeing the smallest hint of the sister he had lost.

#

Lucy dried the last of the mugs and set it on the tray. She liked the back room of the saloon, where she could hear the noise out front and knew Vin and Chris and the others were, but keep to herself, tucked away in the kitchen washing dishes.

The noise out front had died down considerably. Lucy looked at the small clock hanging on the wall and guessed Ezra would be close to closing up for the night.

Lucy took a deep breath and braced herself. She picked up the tray of clean dishware and pushed open the kitchen door with her shoulder.

She looked over the dim interior, feeling her shoulders relaxed when she only saw the familiar group of men with Vin at one table and Inez behind the bar. She set the tray on the bar top and started putting the mugs with the ones they matched below the counter.

She glanced over at the table and saw Chris watching her, before he looked back over to Buck and listened to whatever the other man was saying.

Lucy hurried through her task and back into the kitchen. She picked up the plates of cookies and balanced them carefully. She hesitated before approaching the table. She set the first plate in front of Ezra.

The man looked up at her in surprise and Lucy quickly stepped back.

"What's this?" Ezra asked.

Lucy felt her cheeks flush as all eyes turned towards her and wished she would have left the plate with Inez and gone upstairs.

"It's to say thank you," Lucy said. She risked a look at Ezra, wanting to let him know that she knew the cookies were nowhere near what she must owe him for rent of the upstairs room. "For the—the room…"

Ezra looked puzzled. "There's no need for any payment. I don't believe Mr. Larabee has paid rent in the duration of his stay there."

Chris lifted a brow and Ezra raised a glass in toast to him. "Of course, I benefit from his security for my bar by having an extra gun on the premises." Ezra picked up one of the cookies and took a bite, his eyes lighting up. "Delicious."

She moved closer to Vin and set the other plate of cookies near him and slid it to the middle of the table. She set the last plate near Buck.

Buck took the plate. "I don't know what I done to deserve payment, but I sure ain't turnin' down homemade cookies."

Lucy felt a smile pulling at her lips. "For helping with the shopping," she said.

Buck winked at her. "I'll pick you out a new wardrobe every day of the week if it gets me cookies."

"And I have something for you," Ezra said. He reached into his pocket and pulled out a stack of bills. He flipped through them, counting off a handful and held them out to Lucy. "For your work today."

"Oh, no," Lucy said, shaking her head. "I like to stay busy. You don't need to pay me."

"Well, I enjoy having Inez in my employ and she only threatened to quit twice today. So you more than earned your wages."

"Go ahead, Lucy," Vin encouraged her.

Reluctantly, Lucy took the money. She handed it over to Chris.

Chris nearly spit out his drink when she held the cash out to him. He shook his head sharply. "That's yours."

Lucy felt eyes on her and realized the entire table of men was staring at her. She felt her cheeks start to burn. Any money she had earned back in Texas, doing some mending for some of the women in town, selling her jellies to the storekeeper to put on his shelves, had always been claimed by Eli Joe.

"I'm sorry," she said, realizing she had made a mistake. The dark look in Chris' eyes would have told her that, even if she couldn't see the stares of the men.

She heard the money crumple as her grip on it tightened, and quickly loosened her grip. She took a step back.

"Pull up a chair," Buck said. "I'll even share a few cookies."

Lucy shook her head, feeling a lump lodge in her throat. "I think I'll turn in," she whispered roughly past it.

She hurried to the stairs, and made it upstairs to her room before she closed her eyes and cringed in embarrassment. The embarrassment mingled with shame and a pain in her chest as she realized how little she really knew about marriage.

How little she knew about anything but just surviving.

Lucy shut the door to her room firmly, turning the lock and breathing a sigh of relief to be in the familiar safety of the room. She went to the window and lifted the sash just enough to let some of the cool night air in, cooling her heated cheeks.

She pulled the curtains, leaving them to flutter in the light breeze. She tried not to think of Chris as she pulled one of her nightgowns from her suddenly full dresser. Her kitten batted at her bare toes until Lucy lifted him to the bed with her.

She slipped between the sheets, pulling the blankets up, nearly over her head as the loneliness set in. She closed her eyes, willing the pain to be numbed by sleep.

She was nearly asleep when she heard the familiar footsteps in the hallway. The door of the room next to hers opening and closing quietly. Chris' movements as he readied for bed and the creak of his mattress when he settled into bed.

Rolling over and pulling the covers more tightly around her, Lucy fell asleep.

#

She could do this.

It was a short walk to the livery. The streets were relatively quiet.

She could do this.

Lucy felt the weight of Vin's knife in the leather sheath hidden beneath her skirts, something she had carried with her for the last year, since Vin had to leave Texas. She had the means to protect herself again.

Taking a deep breath, Lucy went out the front door of the still empty saloon. She pressed her lips together to keep them from trembling and started down the street toward the livery.

It didn't matter that it was a small mountain to summit—walking by herself across the town that was growing familiar to her. It felt like Everest. She thought of the teacher she had for one year back in Texas that had told stories about far off places in the Far East like Everest. Vin had loved it when she would tell him the stories she had heard.
It had been Vin who insisted she go to school while he hired himself out as a farm hand, ranch hand, whatever would keep a roof over their heads.

Thinking of those days with Vin was better than thinking of every fear that chased her. Lucy kept a tight rein on her thoughts, though her steps did speed up until she was running the last few steps to the livery.

Once inside the barn, Lucy drew a shaky breath. Then another. And looked around. She had done it. She had walked past all those strange men on the street and ventured across town. She had done it twice now, though yesterday it had been pure annoyance with Chris and Vin that had driven her the distance. Today she had made the conscious decision to make the walk.

Feeling a small measure of pride, Lucy went through the stable and out the back to the pens.

She hesitated when she saw him.

Chris was patiently working with her horse, speaking softly as he saddled the mare.

Lucy moved closer, the last of the tension from her walk to the livery dissipating as she saw Gal tolerating Chris setting the saddle on her back. He pulled the cinch in place.

Chris glanced over his shoulder and Lucy paused.

Without comment, Chris opened the gate to the pen and held it for Lucy.

She stepped inside, going to her horse and reaching a hand slowly to scratch the mare's neck.

Chris went back to the saddle, tightening the cinch slightly. Gal kept her head raised, ready and alert for danger, but didn't move her feet.

"She's starting to trust you," Lucy whispered. She glanced over at Chris.

He met her eyes, his green eyes serious. "Hope she knows I'd never hurt her."

Lucy quickly looked back at the horse. She ran suddenly trembling fingers over the nearly white mane, straightening the coarse locks in place.

"I think she's learning." Lucy swallowed hard.

Chris moved to the other side of Gal, leaving Lucy with enough space to collect herself.

She stayed near the horse as Chris finished what he was doing, leading the horse with the saddle on, putting one foot in the stirrup, but not getting in the saddle. Easing Gal back towards the trust she had once had for people.

#

Chris focused on the horse in front of him. The small palomino mare was coming along, her skittishness slowly being replaced with some amount of trust. It was easier to focus on the horse than on Lucy at his side.

Lucy's arm brushed his as she reached up to put the bridle on Gal, but she didn't flinch away in a panic, thought she did move away a step.

The horse wasn't the only one who had become less jumpy around him over the week in town.

Chris coughed into his sleeve. Lucy looked at him in concern, so Chris stifled the next cough.

When the mare took the bit easily and lowered her head, Chris felt a smile curve his lips. Lucy would get her horse back. Not a whipped, terrified animal, but the well trained and gentle horse Vin had given to her. Something she had lost had been reclaimed.

"You can ride her tomorrow," Chris said. "Just lettin' her get used to the tack again today."

Lucy nodded without argument.

Chris wouldn't have known the words to say if she had argued, but something in him had been relieved to see her ire at him and Vin two days earlier. To stand up for herself in that small way.

"You know how to shoot?" he asked suddenly.

Lucy looked at him only briefly before nodding.

"Should get you a gun," he said. "Give you some security, make you more comfortable in town."

Lucy opened her mouth like she was going to say something, but she closed her lips, chewing on the bottom one.

"Unless you don't want to carry one," Chris said. Maybe he had missed the mark with his thought.

Lucy spoke up quickly. "I'd like one," she said in her quiet voice. The voice that was becoming too familiar. Chris shook off that thought.

"We'll get you one today," he promised.

"Hey, Larabee," Buck's voice called.

Lucy shifted toward Chris and Chris automatically moved to put himself at Lucy's shoulder to give her a measure of safety.

When Chris saw the look on Buck's face, he knew he couldn't protect Lucy from whatever Buck had to tell them.

Buck tipped his hat at Lucy and rested his hands on the fence rail. "Got a wire from someone who's been keepin' tabs on Eli Joe for me, over in the town he's been hunkered down in."

Chris could feel any of the respite Lucy had found in town leave her as she tensed. Chris braced himself.

"He headed out yesterday. Headed this direction," Buck said, he looked at Lucy apologetically.

Chris heard the small intake of breath, but Lucy didn't say anything more than that.

He took a beat to steady his expression before he turned to Lucy, not wanting her to see the fury he felt at knowing Eli Joe was getting closer to her.

"We'll get supplies and head back to the ranch before dark."

Lucy nodded quickly.

Chris started unsaddling the horse, Lucy waiting until he stepped away with the saddle to unfasten the bridle and gently ease the bit from the mare's mouth.

"Thanks, Buck," Chris said as they put the tack away, coughing again and drawing Lucy's eye again.

"You need anything?" Buck asked.

Chris shook his head. "I'll get the supplies rounded up. Just keep an eye out from town."

"You know I will."

Chris started toward the saloon, then caught himself. Lucy may have a preference in what he had at the ranch. He changed direction. Lucy stayed in step near him, not asking where they were going.

The bell over the door rang when he held it open for Lucy.

"Get what you need," he instructed. "Depending on how long it takes him to get here, we may be holed up at the ranch for awhile."

Lucy's face was pale at the threat of her sham of a husband finding them, but she didn't say anything. Just nodded. She went to the dry goods and started looking over the canned goods.

Chris went to the firearms at the rear of the store. He lifted a pistol, feeling the size in his hand. He glanced at Lucy, then put it back and chose a smaller one.

He held it up, examining its quality.

He crossed to Lucy. "What do you think?" he asked.

She startled at his presence and looked down at the gun in his hand.

Chris held it out for her to take. Lucy pulled her bottom lip between her teeth again, but took the gun.

"You think you can handle that one?" he asked.

Lucy nodded. She started to hand the gun back to Chris, but he shook his head. "Hold onto it. I'll get some ammunition and settle up with Tompkins. You know what you need?"

Lucy nodded again.

"Tell Tompkins. He'll package it for us."

Chris kept an eye on Lucy, making sure she was comfortable at the counter, listing the food they would need to the store owner.

She spoke too low for Chris to hear, but he saw Tompkins writing down what she listed and she laid the gun on the counter.

Getting the bullets they would need for her gun, Chris brought them to the counter. Another cough and he told the shopkeeper to add a bottle of tonic and some tea leaves to the order. If Lucy came down with this cough out at the ranch, he'd make sure they had what they needed for her. He pulled the money needed for their purchases out when Tompkins added the total.

He squinted at the sun as they went back outside, his head starting to ache.

"We'll get lunch, then saddle the horses," Chris said.

Lucy didn't offer any argument, not that Chris expected anything different. He saw Vin walking toward the saloon ahead of them and looked down at Lucy.

"Tanner!" Chris called. He muffled a cough the yell incited.

Vin turned, then started toward them.

"Buck told me," Vin said without preamble, as he approached.

Chris nodded. "We'll be headin' out soon. You and Lucy should get lunch. I'll finish what needs doin' to take to the ranch." He knew Vin would stay in town, ready to draw Eli Joe's attention there rather than risk leading the man out to the ranch. No telling how long it would be before Lucy could see her brother again.

Vin's face was drawn tight with the threat over their heads again. He took the truce Chris offered.

"You need anything, Pard?" he asked.

Chris shook his head. "I'll go get the wagon ready."

Lucy gave Chris a look of appreciation as he sent her off to lunch with Vin. Seeing her anger at the two of them had ebbed made the truce worth it.

But it didn't change the fact that Chris shouldn't be getting so at ease around Lucy. Eli Joe was on his way and there would be no reason for him to be near Lucy after that.

Chris shut those thoughts away firmly. He had been alone before Lucy. Nothing had changed. He would be fine when she went back with Vin.

#