"You're a vain one, Momonga." He said to himself when he reached back to pluck a stray strand of black hair from around his robe. He said it quietly enough that there was no way anyone could have heard it, least of all the unconscious human who lay dumped on the luxurious bed in one of the rooms of Nazarick.
'Nishikienrai's room.' He thought reflexively, the room certainly reflected his old comrade's aesthetic, swords of unsurpassed value thanks to now actually having the flavor text that was written into their data when created, lined the walls. There were katanas, great swords, bastard swords, fencing swords, xiphos, falchion, and kukris, to name a few, turned the room into a sword weeb's paradise.
One look at Brain Unglaus and the way he clutched his sword even when asleep, and that was the place Momonga knew the blue-haired human belonged.
There was a knock at the door, a gentle rapping that could only belong to a few sets of knuckles in all of Nazarick, but Momonga didn't have to see to know who it was, even if she hadn't spoken up immediately.
"Lord Momonga, I've finished, I put the girl toys I found into rooms of their own and Yuri Alpha is looking after them." Shalltear's voice passed through the door, and with a slight twinge of guilt in his heart, Momonga opened the door to let her in.
She was shaking with what Momonga hoped was happiness, 'Please, please just let that be happiness.' He prayed, and brought his hand out to rest it on her head. "Good job, Shalltear, good job."
"Squeeaaa! Lord Mo-monga praised me!" She clenched her hands into fists and pushed her head harder into his wide palm. Standing so much taller than she, he could see into her big red bow.
'That is a very strange place to keep a notebook. But I suppose there are worse spots.' He thought while she lost herself in his petting.
"That slut is going to be sooooo jealous!" Shalltear squirmed with her feet together and asked, "Is there anything else I can do, Lord Momonga? Anything? Huhhhhh?"
"Ah, no, that'll do for now." Momonga replied and hastily added, "You may go, but ah, a question first?"
"Lord Momonga?" She asked, a tiny sad pout formed on her face when his hand finally came away.
"Why did you refer to the others as 'girl toys'?" He had a sinking feeling he could guess her answer, and instantly regretted the asking.
Shalltear cocked her head, "When you told me what to do with them, I assumed you chose to keep them as playthings, they are mere humans after all?"
'Well there's a grim thought. I should probably explain my policies on humans and other races outside of Nazarick later… preferably before I start sending them out on more sensitive missions.' With that mental note made, he said only, "I see. Well, we'll talk more about that later, Shalltear, but for now, you may go."
"My Lord." She said and curtseyed deeply with a bow of her head and a rosy blush on either side of her joyful smile.
When she was gone and the door was shut, Momonga found himself alone with the sleeping blue-haired swordsman, 'Maybe I should have had a servant attend to me while I meet him?' He wondered, and then thought better of it. 'If I want to make friends… if I want to make friends, I can't set myself above the ones I'm meeting.'
He blinked back the welling of tears that threatened him again, and sought distraction from the thought by going to a nearby round table and seating himself away from his 'guest'.
The chair was hard wood and painted silver, a contrast to the gold of the table that was frankly at least a little bit garish in Momonga's eyes. 'Bukubukuchagama and Peroroncino both thought he was a little 'loud' with the colors of his quarters. Maybe he agreed with them, he never did use them much.' Momonga thought and began to stir up happy memories that pushed away his sense of loss before the ache could grow too great for him to bear.
On the wall beside the table were the everhorns, a pair of hollowed out horns from bulls that were endlessly filled with mead that would never spoil. They sat upright in small upright stands whose bowed shape kept the horns steady until removed.
They were a trash drop item used only by dedicated role players, but that category included everybody in Nazarick, and now it turned out… like everything else with flavor text, it seemed to work. Momonga tilted his head a little, the honey based concoction glistened in the dim light of the glowstones that lit the room.
The drinker in him was enthusiastic to try it, given that everything he'd had to drink Gazef under the table had been a thousand times better than anything provided by the cheap bars of his homeworld.
But while he was contemplating that, he heard the stirring of sheets as his 'guest' awoke.
Brain went from zero to hyper in an instant, "Where am I?! What happened to that monster?!" He flung the sheets away from his body, his head swung left and right in a search for nonexistent danger, and then went as stiff as a statue when he beheld the luxury surrounding him.
"You are in Nazarick, my home. I'm sorry if my servant was a little rough with you." Momonga said from the chair, for a moment he made to stand, putting his hand on the table and chair to push himself up, but when the swordsman's eyes widened a little, Momonga stopped the motion and settled himself back into the seat.
"You're in no danger, I promise. I just wanted to meet you, that's all. I heard about you, and you reminded me of someone, also, I heard you were a skilled swordsman capable of using martial arts. I hadn't intended violence, but it seems my servant was overly enthusiastic about your agreement."
"A punch to the face will do wonders for agreement." Brain shot out the pithy statement, one eye on the door leading out of the room, it didn't take a genius to see he was considering running.
"I won't force you to stay, but if you would do me the honor?" Momonga removed the horns from the shelf and set them on the table, one in front of himself, one in front of the other side, "I was hoping to get to know you a little bit."
Brain's eyebrows went up and his mouth opened at the curious invitation. He didn't leave his bed for the door, or for the table, or at all. Instead he said, "My men are slaughtered, I've been punched into unconsciousness, dragged here against my will and…" He looked down at himself, he wasn't wearing his regular clothes, "what am I wearing?"
It was a bright blue silk robe with a white fur trim at the sleeves, to say it would have blinded a rainbow would have been an understatement, but like all the clothing in Nazarick, the flavor text made it exceptionally comfortable.
"Sleeping clothes belonging to the previous occupant of this room, a very good friend of mine. Again, I am sorry for your rough treatment, I swear to you that was not my intent." Momonga bowed his head, "I should have sent someone with a more gentle touch, but knowing there were bandits involved- well I hope they were not too close of friends to you. It is hard to lose friends."
Brain shook his head, "No, didn't like em, not even a little. It was just easier to lead them than to deal with their shit." Curiosity was getting the better of him thanks to both his comfort and the lack of evident threat, and he began to slide his way toward the end of the bed.
"The others were treated more gently than yourself, I will do what I can to make up for your less kind welcome." Momonga added, and Brain stopped when his feet hit the floor.
"Others?" He asked. "What others?"
"Two village girls from a place called Carne, some soldiers of the Re-Estize Kingdom, and their leader, Gazef Stronoff." Momonga answered, and Brain shot up to his feet.
"Gazef is here?" There was an energy in his voice that Momonga didn't expect, and the salesman in the Lord of Nazarick seized on it.
'It's always easier to connect with people when you share a friend in common.' He thought, and said quickly and truthfully, "Yes, he's a good friend of mine. If you'd like to see him, I'd be happy to arrange it later, he is likely asleep now, it is very, very early in the morning after all."
"Yes, yes I'd be grateful, thank you." Brain said with the beginnings of a grin on his face that he was clearly fighting to suppress.
"It's my pleasure, now, are you thirsty?" Momonga asked and waved his hand toward the upright horn.
"Very." Brain answered, and approached the table to claim the offered seat.