As the winter settled in so to did the Grand Duke and Grand Duchess, into their new roles as father and mother. Just when they thought they knew what love was, these little babies came along to remind them how big love really is. Now in late December, at three months old, the twins are full of their own love and energy.
The first few weeks were a fright. Mary had decided not to take on a wet nurse, as Mrs. Nevitt told her breastfeeding burns a lot of calories. "Not only is the mother's milk good for the babies, but it's also good for you. It relieves the ache in your breasts, reduces their size, and also aids you in losing the baby weight. Which I know you've been concerned about." All of those things assisted in making up her mind.
However, she did not anticipate how the feeding would actually go with two of them. Though awkward at first, they all three got into a nice feeding pattern. The only weirdness has come with the twin's reactions to things. If one of them is held then the other one has to be held as well. If one of them cries then the other starts. If one of them is awake, they will wake up the other one. And so it goes. They must do things in twos.
There are several good things about the babies being three months old. For one they are now able to sleep a good six or seven hours long. Thank the Lord because both mom and dad are wiped out with waking up at all hours of the night. Even though the twins have a "nanny", Charles and Mary want to comfort their babies their own selves. They refuse to allow their children to be accessories like other noble families do. Instead, they are very involved and hands on, so far, as parents.
Accompanying the nighttime sleep and feeding schedule is their daytime routine. Their nap times have been more automatic too. Another good thing is the twins are more alert and also able to identify their parent's voices and faces. When they hear their father's voice that is everything! Their love for both their mother and father knows no bounds, but at the sound of Charles's voice they light up. This is especially true for Owen.
Owen cannot get enough of his dad. Whenever Charles is in the room Owen must be held by him. He cries if the Duke does not pick him up immediately. It doesn't matter where His Lordship is, if the tiny tot hears him (at all) he kicks his feet and makes noises. It almost makes his mother jealous, almost. William does the same for her, but not to the extreme of Owen for his father.
Although she will never forget that one day when both boys wanted to be with His Lordship. This was towards the end of last month, in November. The boys had awakened from a nap and were fed and changed. They heard the Duke talking with Jeffery about something or other. They began crying. Mary, holding both of them, started bouncing them in her arms. This usually works, but it didn't. She tried rocking them. That did not work either. She tried everything she knew, but nothing calmed them down.
Her mind landed on walking with them around the house. Once they passed Charles's study they calmed, until they couldn't see his face anymore. Then they cried again. Thinking this suspicious, she backtracked. They stopped fussing upon seeing their father but cried when they couldn't. Finally, she entered the study with the babes. Charles made to get up, but she stopped him.
Holding out her hand to keep him in place, she spoke. "Husband your sons are in want of you. Allow me to show you." He motioned for her to go ahead, which she did. She left the room and began moving in the hallway, where they couldn't see him. The crying began. Once she passed by the office it stopped, until the same thing happened as before with not seeing their father.
When she entered the room a huge smile lit up his face. Getting up, the Duke crossed the room and took both babies into his arms. He inhaled their clean baby scent and placed kisses on their heads. "What can I say? They love their father." Seeing her face looking a little put-out, he asked "But what about you? Are you in want of me, because I am in want of you?"
Her face flushed at his words. Having only been churched not too long ago, they had not resumed their nightly activities. Coming back from her thoughts, now entering late December they still have not renewed those. She picked William up and let Owen continue to nap, with the nanny watching over him.
Today they are putting the finishing touches on the Christmas decorations. The Duke and Duchess are hosting a holiday feast for the people of Wales. They plan to journey to Suffolk in June. Both of them feel terrible about not spending near enough time there, but they are encouraged because Suffolk continues to prosper. Even though they are ruling from Wales, the fruit of their labor is still flourishing in their home Duchy.
After changing William, she carried him with her to the downstairs sitting room. It seems this room has become her own study of sorts. A small writing desk has been placed by the window, where all of the Christmas plans sit on top of it. With the babe in one arm, her hand reached for a parchment with her other. It contained the decorations and feasting list.
She took a seat on the sofa beside Dot, who had been rechecking all of the invitation responses. William was content to lay in his mother's arms. He's such a non-fussy babe, unlike his brother who is very vocal. Charles is fond of saying they were named correctly because Owen has more of "the Tudor spirit" than his calmer brother does. They are also easy to identify since Doctor Pearce told them they are what academia calls fraternal twins.
While at first glance they may appear similar, they are very different. William favors his mother more in bone structure, coloring, and hair. It's slightly lighter like Mary's. Owen favors his father. He takes after him in almost every way, even eye color with a bit of brown in the left eye. Overall they are the most adorable babies as far as babies go. At least their parents think so.
After checking over her list, she traded lists with Dot. Perusing the holiday responses, she asked "Must we truly send for Catherine Willoughby?"
Dot scrunched up her nose. "We must. It would be a slight if you didn't. You and I seriously need to visit Lady Flora soon. She has ideas on the girl."
Of course, she does. Lady Flora has ideas on top of ideas. But this is one Mary agrees with. Catherine needs to be wed off. "Yes. We should definitely visit her. I'll send a letter to see if we can visit tomorrow. In the meantime, let's go inspect the garlands." The two ladies got up and ambled into the large ballroom.
It's there where all of Mary's helpers, who are actually ladies from the Cardiff community, have set up shop. The women have been busy helping the servants transform Hapus House into a Christmas fit for a king. They have been stringing garlands, arranging flowers, making wreaths, adding ribbons everywhere, on top of assembling fruit baskets for the needy to distribute throughout Wales. Running through each room there is a thread of blue tying all the decorations together. Blue is Mary's color of choice, and she tells everyone "It's part of our family's crest." So in every room, there is something blue.
Even the guest bedrooms are prepped for the holidays. Vibrant reds dress up the moody brown furniture. Red roses are added in vases. This year, Mary wanted to incorporate bells. There are Christmas bells added into garlands and wreaths around the home. But her favorite room so far is the dining room, where it's draped in all white with blue china place settings. The white makes the room look like winter's snow. The simple olive branch garland draped on the mantle is incredibly tasteful and very elegant.
Not to be outdone, each of the giant windows outside has wreaths hung on them. On the deer head's antlers, in the great room, the footmen also placed a Christmas wreath. Wreaths are everywhere, including the twin's nursery hung over their bed. Mary and Dot stood at the entrance taking in the view guests see upon arrival. From where they are standing, turning their heads this way and that, everything both of them have seen is lovely.
In the distance, she heard her husband's voice. William did too and he turned in the direction of it, although his little head still rested on his mother's shoulder. Dot gave her a look. "So how are things between the two of you, in the bedroom?" She wonders because her friend has been very self-conscious since giving birth.
Not knowing what to say, Mary felt her face turn red and looked down at her baby. "Dot I don't want to talk about this," she stated. She kissed William instead.
With hands on her slender hips, Dot informed her "Oh we will talk about this. Don't think you're getting out of it so easy."
Talking to the baby, Mary smiled. "Auntie Dot is very nosy isn't she?" William held his head up, looked at his mother, and rested it down again.
At that time Charles walked down the stairs. He caught sight of Mary holding one of the twins. With his head held high, and a cheerful smile on his face, he came to stand beside his wife. William looked at him and made a noise. Glancing down at his son, he asked "Do you want to come to Daddy?" The babe reached for him and Mary passed him over.
In truth she's relieved. Her arm had grown tired. Dot told her she was going to go help the women hang the last of the garlands. Once she had left, Charles leaned down and kissed his sweetheart. He cannot figure out why she's been rebuffing his advances. It almost reminds him of the days after the ambush, but that was different entirely. This he isn't sure of. It leaves him confused.
"Is Owen up? Do you know?" she wondered. If he's up, then he needs to be fed and should join his brother.
Fixing his eyes on his wife, he responded. "I don't know. I didn't stop to check. I wanted to see you, so I came downstairs. Your father sent a letter requesting we visit after the new year. In his words, he wants to meet his grandchild."
Curious. Mary began walking to a servant girl, whom she asked to go find out about Owen. Then she led her husband and son to the sitting room, where they sat on the sofa. "Grandchild? Doesn't he know we have two children?"
A strange expression came over Charles. "No. He doesn't. I did not tell him about the twins. I only wrote to him after the birth letting him know, and I quote, you had a safe and healthy delivery. That everything and everyone in our house is strong and well."
She chuckled. "That's one way of putting it. So he truly has no clue he has twin grandsons. The look on his face will be priceless. Plus he's probably expecting we had a girl because that's what my mother had. He will be floored for sure. I don't know if it will be a good floored or a bad one. As for the Evil Queen, I could care less about her. Which I heard she is pregnant again. Is that true?" He nodded his head yes.
How peculiar, she wondered. "Why would she choose to get pregnant again, so soon after the first one?"
This is great. It gives him a leeway to discuss their own intimacy. "Because maybe she had sex with His Majesty and it led to a new baby. Wouldn't you want that?"
In an instant, she emphatically uttered the word "No!" His face fell and he chose to look at his son, so she wouldn't see. What he heard and what she meant are two different things. "I would absolutely not want to be pregnant again right away. I literally gave birth to two of them and they're only three months old. I do not want another babe for at least a year, maybe two."
What she didn't say was she felt like crap. When she looks at herself all she sees is a poochy belly, stretch marks, big hips, and these... these boobs. Plus when she brushes her hair, a lot more of it has been coming out. And she hates it and feels really frumpy. Even though Dot tells her "You have been losing weight. You'll be back to your pre-baby weight soon", it's still not enough. Plus she feels like she's cried more now than she did when pregnant.
In order to not allow her husband to see her cry, she goes into a totally different room and closes the door. Then she sits on the floor and cries. She doesn't think this is a normal mother's reaction. And one time Owen was being super fussy. The babe would not stop crying, and she cried too. Again not normal. So no, she does not want another one right now. Just thinking about it makes her heart speed and anxiety flair up.
Standing, she went over to the window to catch her breath. The outside, snowy world calmed her spirit. The snow doesn't care about what it touches, it covers everything regardless. She wishes she could be like that. Not caring so much about things. When she turned around her husband and baby were gone.
The next day she and Dot visited Lady Flora at her "lonely manor house in Penarth." Lonely is not the word to describe it. Simple but stately in all white, blending in with the snow. The carriage dropped the girls off at the door, and Mr. Harris saw them inside. He is still curmudgeonly toward them, but he did manage to crack a smile at first.
Lady Flora awaited the pair in her front parlor. "It is so good to see you both. It's been far too long." They absolutely agreed. This is the first time Mary has left the house since giving birth. Plus it's also her first time without the babies. It's weird yet freeing.
After pouring her guests cups of tea, the Dowager Countess stated "We have so many things to discuss. But first how is your sex life?" She looked right at Mary, whose eyes grew large. "Don't feign shock. You are in the company of friends and you knew I would ask."
Apparently, the Countess felt like ripping the stitches out of the wound. Mary looked at her. "But isn't it a crass subject to talk about?"
Dot laughed and Lady Flora answered "If only we all had moral and pure thoughts. What would the poor clergymen have need of to do? You are addressing your friends, Dear, not the nuns."
Seeing fit to answer for her friend, Dot declared "She is feeling insecure about herself. Which means her sex life has been void for almost six months. Way back to before she entered her confinement." Mary gave her a dirty look.
Clucking her tongue, Flora shook her grey head. "Dear girl, that will not do. I sense deeper issues at root here. The only way to lessen the hold something has on you is to discuss it out loud. Tell us what is going on."
At first, Mary didn't want to. She sat wringing her hands and fiddling with her necklace. But then she got to talking and it all came out, including a lot of tears. The Countess sat on the other side of her and held her as a mother does a child. It's the first time she's been held like that in a long time. It makes her miss her mother.
Once the tears subsided, her older friend reminded her "I too have been where you are. I am a mother as well you know. Most women in our society don't talk about such things. So you feel alone in your suffering. But you are not the first, and I dare say won't be the last. I think what you need is to talk to Mrs. Nevitt." And so the nurse was sent for.
Though it took almost half an hour, Mrs. Nevitt appeared in the parlor. She and the three ladies talked for a long time. In fact, she assured Mary other women in Wales have felt the same as she. "Most women experience bouts of melancholia after birth. I don't think it's treated in England, but I tell our female patients to do these things. First, make sure you eat a protein-rich diet, get regular exercise, plenty of natural sunlight, ample sleep every night, and be involved in some kind of social activity. It's important to not shut yourself off from the world. Those things have helped drastically reduce the fits of melancholy in the women."
Then talk turned to intimacy matters. Mrs. Nevitt advised her to take licorice root to prevent pregnancy. She also told her of other herbs that allow the woman to miscarry. Mary immediately ruled that out, as any babe is a gift from God. Plus that would break her husband's trust and she could not do that in good conscience. But then Mrs. Nevitt told her to talk to her husband about these things and see what he has to say. "Because there are things men can do to prevent pregnancy, especially while you're recovering from giving birth and melancholia."
Mary sat there taking in everything Mrs. Nevitt has to say. She is thankful to have such good friends with sound words, who have her best interests at heart. Once Mrs. Nevitt left talk turned to Catherine Willoughby.
The Dowager Countess gobsmacked them with her opening words. "My Dear I have it on good authority that she is a part of the ambush of the Duke."
Those words left both Mary and Dot stunned. "Surely not," Her Highness suggested.
Lady Flora gave her an insulted look. "Dear Girl, love is a more dangerous motive than enmity. She may hate you, but fancies herself in love with your husband. I have long since told you to marry her off. Now here's the shocker." Looking right at Lady Dot, she told her "You helped her in ambushing the Duke."
Gasping for breath, Dot took a paper off the coffee table. She started fanning herself. "I feel faint!"
Mary stared at both the Countess and Dot. "How did Dot help? I don't understand."
The Countess held her hand up to the Duchess and inquired as to something. "Dear Dot did you leave any of the letters Mary wrote you unattended? Think carefully."
She did think and think and think. "Yes, I did. They were easily accessible in my room. I left them on my desk."
Nodding Lady Flora explained it all. "You unintentionally aided in the ambush. I have it on good authority the letters were accessed and read. The information in them, particularly the Duke's trips to the border, was passed along. Now to whom it was passed on remains the big mystery. For if we catch who that is, then we will have the true culprit. But make no mistake your ward set him up."
That news made Dot wretch into a bucket and Mary's heart pound furiously, which then made her dizzy. "But why? Why would she do a thing like that?" She needs to know.
"To hurt you of course. I don't think, in all actuality, the girl intended for His Highness to be hurt. But perhaps scare you enough to put him aside, or make him put you aside. Thereby rendering him in need of a wife. Which she would fill. As I said the time has come to marry her off. Before you do she needs to confess what she knows. Because there is a larger culprit to be had lying in wait out there for who knows what nefarious reason." And with those words, Lady Flora called Mr. Harris for "A glass of brandy, for me, and two shots of wine, if you please." She told them it would calm their nerves.
And so they sat calming their nerves. Though how calming it was Mary is unsure. For her own nerves are going as fast as a carriage careening out of control. All she can think about is who Catherine Willoughby is helping.