The tension in the room was thick with suspense before suddenly the sound of an explosion shot off in the distance. The rumbling of fire and wind tore its way through the helicarrier, erupting through the air vents from the floor. Johann felt his body lurch into the air by a soldering force. He was flung over the table behind him, an agonizing pain shooting through his back as he and the sceptre just barely managed to stay inside of the helicarrier. Lights began to glare red as alarms sounded from the destroyed machines around them. Voices sounded around him, some screaming in alarm, others barking orders. The sound of heavy boots pinged off the metal hallways as people scrambled to safety and to fight. The pain began to subside quickly in Johann's back as the world around him began to become clear again. His eyes drifted up in a daze as he barely Steve and Tony snapping out of their trance and looking to each other for assurance as they ran off to prepare to fight. The daze he was in comforted him as the others left the room quickly after them. He found himself on the ground the warmth of the fire and the light of the sceptre were all that remained with him. The world around him began to come back into focus turning his head to the window. He saw smoke billowing out of one side of the helicarrier and shards cradled him.

He slowly sat up, he brought a hand up to his head feeling for any damage on the electronic mask, and it appeared to be stable. He shifted slowly before the whispering began again, the sceptre once again calling to him. "What do you want from me?" He croaked, barely finding his voice with the excess smoke that plumed around him. It finally dawned on him that this was his chance, with the chaos of the fight, no one would notice him stealing the sceptre and running. He slowly reached towards it and picked it up in his gloved hand. He held onto it tightly as he slowly stood up, using the table to help stabilise him. The way the sceptre's light reflected in his eyes bought the memories of that fateful day racing back to him. The beautiful, enticing and mythic light spoke to him in ways that no one could understand.

He heard a bellowing roar from beneath him and the videos that Agent Coulson showed him sounded in his mind. He looked around quickly before assuring himself that he was safe from whatever beast Dr Banner turned into. Large footsteps stormed beneath him and for a brief moment, his scientific enthusiasm returned to him as he made his way to the hole in the floor to witness the man turned monster. To his disappointment, smashed debris was all he could see and the sound of Bruce roaring. The mindless destruction embraced his enthusiasm gleefully, the familiar feeling of chaos embracing him like the sunglow of a winter's day. The beauty of annihilation, the familiar sounds, he had almost forgotten it and the comfort that it bought him. He turned to look out the smashed window the light of the sun reflecting off the metal illuminating the debris around him. His grip tightened around the sceptre as slipped into a daydream of the life he once knew. 'The power of the Gods.' The phrase repeated over and over in his head until it consumed his thoughts and every sensation he felt. It was deafening, in the way, an orchestra's triumphant final chord could be.

In his daze, he did not hear Loki's disguised men make their way into the lab with him. They held their weapons close as they moved swiftly into the room. They had every exit blocked and their eyes never left their target's back. I

"You best step away from that window Skull, and maybe drop the sceptre while ya at it,"

'Summers.' Johann thought. He could not forget that distinct American voice that taunted him from his jail cell. A cruel smile made its way to his face as he slowly turned to face the rest of the room. The clicking of guns echoed around him, a familiar sight to the superheroes. "Scared are you?" A small chuckle followed his comment.

"Put it on the ground now vermin!" Summers urged as he raised his weapon to point directly at the villain's head. "If you play nice, then maybe we won't have to kill you."

Johann laughed again as he tossed the sceptre into his other hand, his eyes shining with a tormented glee. "I thought I'd never hear from you again Summers, and here I thought you hated bad people." He paused for a moment as he looked towards the gleam of the sceptre for reassurance. "I often wondered if I would ever sadly have to see you again. Let's make it so that I don't have to wonder anymore, shall we?"

He didn't know what would happen, only that it felt right. The sceptre began to spark and crackle with intense energy. Johann swung his arm around swiftly, and a well-aimed bolt of energy flew and hit Summers directly in the chest. He let out an agonising scream as he flung backwards. After the clatter of his body falling to the floor, there was silence.

The other brainwashed soldiers looked down at their fallen comrade and then back up to Johann, whose eyes held a resounding rage. He felt powerful again, he felt whole again. But why did it hurt to feel the comfort once more to accept that he could be who he used to be? The thoughts of power and triumph began to shift and change into images of his life, what lead him to his successes and then his failure before landing on his time spent in the modern world. Steve Roger's face clouded his mind with talk of righteousness and compassion. A pang of intense guilt bore deep in his chest that he couldn't understand and that he didn't want to understand. He growled in frustration, 'There is no time for this!' He thought angered why now of all times? The sceptre began to spark with light again as more and more memories shot into his mind.

Painful, happy, sad and glorious nothing was left unforgotten. He screamed inside himself in a last-ditch attempt to stop the mind stone in its wrathful path. Images of his childhood, the orphanage and his best friend, Dieter. Pain seared through his shoulder as he suddenly shot his eyes open to see one of the soldiers had opened fire at him. His eyes lit up golden before another beam of light shot out of the sceptre at the man. Another soldier ran towards him in a vain attempt to grab it. Johann retaliated with a quick shove and kick sending him to the ground. Another blinding memory shot into his mind as he struggled to remain attentive in the middle of the fight.

"How old are you?"

"Nine."

"What were you in for?"

"I killed my mother."

"Pardon?"

"Died in childbirth."

"So. Orphanage to reformatory and in another ten years… Prison!"

'Bastard. If only he knew who I would become.' Johann thought viciously as he was awoken back into consciousness by a swift punch to his face. He reacted with a swing of the sceptre to the soldier's face. Rage coursed through his body as he fought the soldiers violently and relentlessly. He showed them the wrath that had earned him the name of the Red Skull.

"You may have been raised by wolves… But you're still a human being. Not that that's necessarily gonna help you much in this world."

Johann's hand connected with a soldier's neck and he gripped it tightly. He lifted the soldier off the ground and held him in the air his blue eyes wild. The soldier thrashed around and grabbed at Johann's arms. His movements slowed until he finally passed out and Johann dropped him to the ground. The wildness in his eyes drifted as a sombre memory greeted him.

"Who gets ahead? In this world, as it is now? It's whoever's the strongest. Doesn't matter if he's right. He gets to make the rules. Keep the weak right where they are. But it's not going to be like that forever. People like us… People like you, Johann. We're going to make it better."

Silence. All the soldiers were dead, unconscious or had fled. His eyes drifted absentmindedly as the fury subsided and the guilt set in. "We're going to make it better." He repeated the words of a man he once knew, many years ago. If only that man had lived to see what that young boy had become. If only that man could see him now. His consciousness returned to him as he felt his eyes strain from sadness. "Who am I?" He was no longer the Red Skull now, a powerful figurehead for a corrupt and evil regime. He was just Johann Schmidt. A boy who is alone in a world that he doesn't understand, that hates him, and all he knows how to do is fight. To fight the bullies. But that was impossible, he should never be forgiven for the pain he has caused people, to the ones he loved. Nor should those that supposedly cared for him, receive the forgiveness that they don't deserve. Every life taken is another rung to add to the ladder that he stands upon. Proof to those that doubted him that he was better, that he was stronger than they gave him credit for. But what is the point of this ladder now that it is crumbling underneath the weight of his newfound morality, crushed by his monumental failures and pain?

His arms trembled as his eyes met with the glow of the sceptre once more. It was no longer comforting, it was cold. Like the glare of his headmaster who beat him for stepping a toe out of line, or the scoff of the people on the street as they saw this homeless boy scramble between alleyways and garbage to survive.

"You know Johann. If I can succeed in making this serum, I may finally have figured out what we can do with that righteous energy of yours."

"What? But I thought-"

"I know, I know. It is meant for Hitler and the Nazis. But I do not want them to have it. I want someone I can trust, someone I know who can do some good. That someone is you."

"It's alluring, isn't it? The mind stone." A snide voice came from his left. He turned his head to meet the mischievous gaze of the god himself, Loki. "It tears at the very fabric of your thoughts. I understand, truly, but I think it's best you give that back to me." Behind him stood one of the soldiers that managed to flee Johann's early rampage.

Johann glanced at the soldier who readied his weapon in fear but was soon gestured to stand down by the calm Loki. "I can see you aren't who you appear to be, at least who you pretend to be." Loki moved into the room calmly as he spoke. Johann's eyes never left him as he slowly turned his head to follow him. "I mean truly, what do these people know anyway? What do they care? They're all so self-absorbed which is why you were able to manipulate them into trusting you. It's very genius I have to commend you on it."

Johann turned his head in confusion, 'manipulate? I barely hid who I was.' It was at that moment he realised that the god had no idea what he was talking about. Then it became clear. He was desperate, almost as if he too was willed by another force to achieve something. Whatever it was, he needed the sceptre and badly.

"Why don't we work together? You give me the sceptre and I help you attain its power to banish anyone in your wake? My associate here told me you tore through my men like a scythe to reeds. Help me, and you can have power."

Johann scoffed before he chuckled and shook his head. "You're begging me? Here I thought you were a god. You have truly been the most disappointing part of my new life, I thought you were grander but I guess the books took creative liberties when it came to your chapters."

A wave of sudden anger flashed over Loki's face before he took a breath to compose himself. "I'll give you one more chance to come willingly with me."

"I think I like where I am, thank you," Johann swiftly lunged at Loki who disappeared in front of him. Through the ghostly process and the god's powerful trickery magic, he finessed the sceptre out of Johann's hands. Johann quickly whipped around to face Loki who quickly pressed the sceptre to the villain's chest. He felt a force seize his chest as his mind came under fire from the sceptre's influence again. It felt as though a warm stream of water swirled throughout his chest and travelled to his mind, like the sinking feeling of deep sleep. A sharp memory shot through the water like a jagged rock.

"What do you mean no! Abraham you promised! You promised it would be me!"

"I know, Johann but I- Look at you! How can I anymore?"

"But I did everything you asked! I was good, I am trying, I did everything right!"

"You did everything I asked, but you never stopped. You just kept going and going. You are destructive and angry and I should have known that I would not know how to help you and the pain that you feel. I can't fix you Johann I- I don't know what's wrong with you. It's too risky, I can't give you the serum. I have to go, they found out about the serum I have to leave."

"But you promised you would give it to me! You promised you would help me. I tried, I really have! I promise."

"I cannot help you anymore Johann. You're too far gone, you've become like one of them! And I fear… that it's partially my fault."

Rage, the rage was all he knew. It was the one feeling that he has understood since he was a child. No matter how small an inconvenience rage is what followed. Rage fuelled his righteous and his most heinous actions. Rage turned him into the Red Skull figuratively and physically. He felt yanked back into reality from the pull of the drowning water. He looked Loki in the eyes with the anger that seared like a thousand suns. Loki's grin of triumph faded quickly when he realised that the sceptre didn't work on him. "How-"

"Johann!" A voice called down the hallway as the sound of boots clattered hard against the ground. Loki turned to his soldier a motioned for him to leave. He quickly fled as well without another word. Johann stood alone, again, before the familiar face of Steve appeared in the room once more. "You're here?! I thought- Well I- I was helping Stark with the propeller and then these guys came and attacked us and I didn't remember where you went – if you went- and… and… Johann?" Steve's stressed rambling came to a halt as he saw Johann remain frozen in place.

"Hey-" Before he could continue his foot bumped into one of the soldiers on the ground. His eyes shot to the floor where the bodies of about several men lay. He saw the one next to him still breathing and sighed in relief, but he appeared to be one of the lucky ones.

"What's wrong Rogers? Afraid?"

"Hu- Look I don't care what happened here I'm glad to see you're alright and I'm really surprised that-"

"What? That I didn't take the sceptre and run? That I didn't kill everyone on this ship and begin my journey to redemption? What surprised you?" Johann turned to face Steve now, his rage had died down but still burned embers in his cold piercing eyes.

"I have no idea what's gotten into you all of sudden. I'm surprised you didn't run. I mean, you've talked about it before, about how you could easily escape but you never do. Even now you stayed here in the laboratory, why?"

"You don't understand leadership. You merely listen and do. A soldier with no mind of his own.'

Johann couldn't find the words to explain what had happened to him during the fight. The memories won't stop swirling in his mind as if it was playing a film on repeat. His strong stature began to falter as he put a hand on his shoulder where he was shot, it was still bleeding, but only lightly. He could have run, with the sceptre and all, but the guilt was the anchor that held him back and rage was the defence he put up to hide the very thing that he hated about himself the most. His insecurities.

"Johann? Are you okay, did they hurt you?" Steve moved toward him and raised his hand to touch Johann on the shoulder. The wounded man responded by flinching and smacking Steve's arm away from him like a frightened animal backed into a corner.

"I'm fine! Nothing I cannot handle."

"It's okay, I'm not going to hurt you-"

"Oh, you're not, are you? What about before? When they all turned on me you joined in! You didn't look like you weren't going to hurt me then. What changed? You suddenly remembered you have to be a good person did you? What would you have done if they decided to shoot me, would you have joined in?!"

"I don't know!" Steve shouted back. He was clearly exhausted from fighting and visibly upset with his emotions running high. Just before finding Johann he had heard the news that Agent Coulson was killed. A man who looked up to him was killed while he was on the same aircraft, he could have saved him. It killed Steve inside to know that all of them fighting was what ultimately led to the death of a good man, at least that's what he believed. "I don't know." He repeated quietly. "You always ask me these things as if I know the answer but I don't okay! You're right, I'm self-righteous because I'm selfish. I don't know what's good because I didn't live your life, my life was all peachy and I don't understand anything you go through, because you're the only person who has ever suffered."

Johann grit his teeth, he didn't want to hear this now. Steve had no idea about his life, he was right about that. He went to turn away before an arm grabbed him. Steve had swung him around to face him before stepping towards him until he was right in his face. "No, you don't get to just huff and walk out of this conversation this time! I've tried okay. I've baby-sat you when I just wanted some time to comprehend everything I've lost. My whole life, just like yours, got thrown away and why did it get thrown away you ask? Because of you!" Johann could feel Steve's breath on his face as he argued his point passionately. For the first time in their short time together Johann saw the spark that lit up Steve's eyes all those years ago. That passion made him want to do the right thing, the passion that made Erskine choose him.

"Well?!" Steve asked angrily. "No snarky response? No low-cut remark about me?" For a few breathes they held each other's gaze. The tension that had surrounded them their whole working career had culminated until this point. It was suffocating, it filled the space around them until it felt like there was nothing else in this world, except for them. Time slowed to a grinding halt as they stared into each other's eyes. Johann finally spoke up.

"Do you know that you have green in your eyes? It makes them look like the oce-"

Steve held onto Johann tightly with his arm before pulling him into him as the tension disappeared into the crescendo that was a kiss.

Johann was shocked at first unable to comprehend what he felt. At first, he was terrified, what if someone sees!? But this kiss brought on relief, it brought him clarity. It quelled the rage inside him until it was replaced with the harmonious toon of serenity and passion. He found himself lost in it, dazed by it. And he… He liked it.

Steve didn't know why he did it, he didn't know what compelled him to pursue his passion into this. He should hate him, and that is what he would tell himself. But he couldn't, he tried to, but he couldn't bring himself to. Perhaps that was his weakness, he too easily forgives. But the moments, the glimpses behind the visage of the Red Skull, they were precious and they were his to see, Johann allowed him to see. He liked him, in a way that he knows and sees women and men liking each other. He didn't fully understand how it was possible, and why it was Johann of all people to bring this feeling out of him. A part of Steve didn't care to understand, he just wanted to enjoy this moment because he knew that it was most likely to be short-lived. He was right too.

They finally broke apart when there were voices over the intercoms calling for units to stand down and the announcement that the threat was finally over. They continued to gaze upon each other as they both caught their breaths. Steve noticed the beginning of a tear at the edge of Johann's eye. Unlike Steve, this wasn't Johann's first time kissing another man, and that was the final memory that played in his mind before they all subsided and he was finally at sombre ease.