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Harry woke up screaming, the nightmare the worst one he'd had in ages. Hermione ran in and hugged him fiercely as Dan and Emma stood hesitantly in the doorway. Harry realised that she was the reason he hadn't been having nightmares lately.
"Is everything alright?" Emma asked.
"It's fine Mrs Granger. I'm sorry for waking you up. It was just a nightmare, there's nothing wrong," Harry said apologetically.
"That's okay Harry, would you like some hot chocolate to help you settle back to sleep?" Emma asked.
"No thanks Mrs Granger, my stomach feels kind of queasy. A milky drink wouldn't be a good idea," Harry declined.
"Tea then, I have some nice ginger tea that should settle your stomach," Emma offered.
"You should try it Harry it might help," Hermione encouraged.
Harry gave a reluctant nod. "Thank you Mrs Granger."
"Do you have nightmares like that every night?" Emma asked.
"Umm, yeah sometimes," Harry admitted awkwardly. He couldn't admit to the Grangers that he'd had the nightmare because Hermione hadn't been in bed cuddling him. "It's not a problem at school where I can use silencing charms to keep from waking everyone else up."
"But if nobody hears you, then that means nobody is there to help," Emma said concerned.
Harry just shrugged, until he'd married Hermione and they'd started sharing a bed, he'd never realised that having someone there when he woke up from a nightmare would help. He'd only had a few nightmares since he started sharing a bed with Hermione and her hugs always helped him calm down and get back to sleep. Or he thought he'd only had a few nightmares, not realising that he just didn't remember them because most of the time he woke Hermione as the nightmare started and she was able to calm him down and redirect his dream before he woke himself up.
Hermione found that she missed sharing a bed with Harry, she found it hard to sleep, without his warm presence next to her the bed felt cold and too big. Her parents had insisted that he stay in the guest room and she in her own room while they were there. Hermione was irritated that they tried to control her sleeping arrangements even though they knew she was married but Harry was happy to comply so Hermione wouldn't leave and miss Christmas with her parents. She'd wondered whether he was looking forward to having nights on his own.
"Do you want to talk about it?" Hermione asked, once they were alone.
"It started with Sirius falling through the veil, and then he stood up and I could see him though the silvery curtain and he told me that it was my fault. That if I'd killed Voldemort in the graveyard like I was supposed to then he would still be alive, and then Cedric was there saying the same thing, and Mum and Dad said they were disappointed in me for not saving Sirius," Harry said crying.
"Oh Harry, it was just a nightmare. I'm positive Sirius didn't blame you for his death any more than he blamed James for his incarceration, you did your best and nobody could have asked you to do more than that. If anything Sirius' death was his own fault. He wasn't concentrating on the duel, he was having fun taunting Bellatrix instead of getting on with it," Hermione said hugging him to her and running her hand up and down his back soothingly. She held him until her mother came back with the tea then helped him sit up encouraging him to drink it. And then to lie down and try to sleep.
Harry looked at her nervously.
"Lie down, I'll sit with you until you fall asleep," Hermione promised running her fingers through his hair.
"Thanks Hermione," Harry gave her a small smile and closed his eyes doing his best to relax. He found her playing with his hair was surprisingly enjoyable and relaxing. Against his better judgement he drifted off to sleep.
"Do you comfort him from a nightmare often?" Daniel asked as she came back up the stairs.
"No as he said he normally uses a silencing charm so nobody hears him, but he doesn't try to go back to sleep on his own, he gets up and wanders around the castle and ends up exhausted," Hermione replied, thinking back to before their marriage when Harry often looked more tired at breakfast than he had before going to bed.
"How long has he been having nightmares?" Emma asked.
"Since his mother was murdered in front of him when he was one," Hermione said bluntly. "They got worse after his godfather was killed in front of him at the battle in the ministry last year and a classmate the year before that. Even still some of his nightmares are about his childhood with his relatives so I can only guess how bad it got."
"It sounds as if Harry's a dangerous person to be around," Daniel said frowning.
"His parents, godfather and Cedric were all killed by Voldemort and his Death Eaters. Harry killed Voldemort last June and the Death Eaters were all rounded up this time and most of them have been tried and executed. The minister tried to pardon a lot of them last time and Harry threatened that if he tried to pardon them again he would give his memories of fighting them to the newspapers and the wizarding wireless," Hermione replied.
"Harry killed a man?" Daniel asked in horror.
"No Harry killed a monster, a leader of a terrorist organisation that was responsible for thousands of deaths. And it was self defence, Voldemort was trying to kill Harry at the time. Don't you dare judge him for killing him. If he hadn't you and Mum would be in hiding for your lives and I would be fighting a war. A war that couldn't be won until Harry did kill Voldemort because he was prophesied to be the only one that could," Hermione said fiercely.
Daniel Granger took a step back, he'd never seen his daughter so furious. Even when she'd been threatening to go back to school with Harry that afternoon it had seemed to him to be more teenage petulance than genuine anger at his and Emma's reaction to Harry. But there was no doubt in his mind at that moment that if there was a war Hermione would be fighting it at Harry's side, defending him from everyone who meant him harm. The problem was at this moment the person she was defending Harry from was himself.
"Give his memories, you mean tell the reporters a detailed story of what happened?" Emma asked.
"No there's a device called a pensieve. You can use magic to pull a memory out of your head and you and other people can watch it. I'm not sure if you could take a camera into the memory and take photos," Hermione explained.
"So you could show us some memories of learning magic?" Emma asked. She and Daniel had been fascinated by some of the spells Hermione had shown them or used casually without even realising it since she'd arrived home but they'd love to watch her learning a spell for the first time. Harry hadn't done any magic but they'd seen him reach for his wand to do things then stop himself several times.
"If I had a pensieve, they're fairly rare and they'd be really expensive if you could buy one," Hermione replied. "I could ask Harry to teach me a spell but most of the spells he knows that I don't are for duelling so unless he can teach me how to put up the protection wards, they're a little too destructive for use at home. Now I'm going to bed to get some sleep before the arguing and the tension in the house gives Harry another nightmare."
-o0o-
Harry and Hermione decided to go to Diagon Alley the next day while her parents were at work. Harry was tired but he didn't think it would get much better sleeping alone and he couldn't ignore Daniel's relieved expression when he mentioned going out for the day instead of remaining home alone.
Hermione came with him to Gringotts and Harry introduced Hermione as his wife and asked if being married gave him access to the Potter family vaults.
"It does not, but an exception will be made for the Potter family wedding rings if you would like them brought up to choose a set for you and your wife to wear," the goblin account manager told him.
"Yes please I would," Harry said eagerly.
The account manager sent one of his underlings for the rings. Hermione looked pleased but protested that he didn't have to, she was perfectly happy with the ring he'd already given her.
"The family rings will have more protections for your wife than that little trinket," the account manager said, talking directly to Harry and sneering at the glass ring Hermione wore.
"Can you tell me what protections are on each of them or are they all the same?" Harry asked.
"They are not the same," the account manager said.
The goblin came in with a tray of rings.
"Is one of these my mother's?" Harry asked curiously.
"That one," the account manager pointed out an emerald and diamond ring. "Your father was a naïve romantic. The ring has strong protection charms against magical curses but no fidelity or loyalty charms or charms against the mind arts."
Harry noticed Hermione's eyes were drawn to another ring a large ruby solitaire set in filigree gold.
"What about that one?" he asked pointing to it.
"It has the strongest mind protection, loyalty and fidelity charms, the wearer could not betray you, willingly or unwillingly, the protections from curses is the strongest invented at the time but it could be got around by someone who knows what protections are on it," the account manager said approvingly.
"Who would know?" Harry asked.
"No human other than you and your wife would know for certain. The ring hasn't been worn in centuries but anyone from an ancient family might recognise the age of the ring and therefore assume the limitations of its protection," the goblin manager replied.
Harry looked at Hermione. "I know you would never betray me. I don't need a ring to stop you but the protection from mind control or Legilimency might be useful. If you like that one then go for it. We can find another piece of jewellery to enchant for more physical protection."
"You don't want me to wear your mother's ring?" Hermione asked.
"I have no memories of her wearing it so it isn't that special to me, if you'd rather have the other one, I'm fine with it," Harry replied.
"Who owned the other one?" Hermione asked.
"It was first commissioned by Warin Potter for his first wife Rohesia Potter from 1326-68 and then worn by her great grandson Gulielmus Potter's wife Elizabeth from 1370-1422" the account manager reported.
"Is there a reason it hasn't been worn since?" Harry asked.
"Superstition. Gulielmus and Elizabeth had no children, his younger brother became head of the family, a barren marriage was considered unlucky, by the time Guliemus and Elizabeth had been forgotten fashions had changed and diamonds became the preferred stone in wedding rings," the account manager replied.
"It is beautiful, but your mother's ring matches your eyes," Hermione said.
"And mum's ring has better physical protections but no mental protection, it's your choice to make. Choose the one that will make you feel the most safe," Harry said.
"I think this one," Hermione indicated the ruby ring. "The thought of someone messing with my mind frightens me more than anything else."
Harry picked up the ruby ring, and grabbed Hermione's left hand sliding it on. "With this ring I pledge my love, loyalty and fidelity, for as long as we both shall live," he said stating what he remembered hearing of muggle wedding vows.
Hermione kissed him gently. "I pledge my love, loyalty and fidelity for as long as we both shall live," she replied.
"Is there anything else," the account manager asked impatiently.
"Sorry for wasting your valuable time, can you have someone show me to my trust vault and exchange some money to pounds?" Harry said getting up and bowing.
"You don't need pounds Harry, there's plenty left in my savings account," Hermione said.
"I need to pay you back for my stuff," Harry protested.
"Then pay me back in Galleons and save the exchange fee because I'll probably need to exchange it back to Galleons to buy books and top up my stationary," Hermione said reasonably. "I'll make sure Dad sees that you've repaid me."
"Griphook will take you," the account manager said dismissively.
Harry and Hermione left the room to find Griphook waiting for them. He took them down to the vault, and Harry collected a large bag of coins to buy presents and pay for his new clothing. He and Hermione took the opportunity to stop at Florean Fortescue's Ice cream parlour for magical hot ice-cream and then planned to stop at Flourish and Blott's before returning home to Hermione's.
Harry noticed that Hermione was eagerly looking at books but seemed to be reluctantly putting each one back on the shelf instead of in her basket.
"Are you looking for something in particular?" Harry asked, slightly confused as to what she might be looking for in so many different sections of the shop.
"No Harry, if you won't buy books for yourself then I won't let you buy books for me. You're right that you might already have most of these in your family library," Hermione protested.
"What about if you buy whichever of these was written in the last fifteen years. Surely some of them must have been, this is a new book shop," Harry suggested.
"Harry all bookshops have older or classic books, not just new releases," Hermione said.
"Yes I know, they have classic fiction and history books but the technical books and scientific books are all written in the last year or two or they'd be obsolete and there's lots of new fiction and history published every year. Isn't it the same for magical advances and books?" Harry asked.
"The wizarding world doesn't advance that quickly and unlike muggle books none of these will have copyright dates, saying when the first edition or first print run was released," Hermione said.
Harry frowned. "Every time I think I understand the differences between muggles and witches and wizards I come across a new difference. No wonder wizards cling to their old-fashioned ways if there's not even new spells and things to learn," he said sighing.
He took the books from Hermione and asked the store clerk which of these books had been written in the last fifteen years but the young man just sneered at him rudely. Harry shoved the armful of books at him. "Well then if you can't be bothered to answer my questions you can re-shelve these for us. Perhaps the staff at the bookshop in Hogsmeade will be more forthcoming and better informed about their stock," he said.
"What seems to be the problem," Mr Flourish appeared from behind a nearby shelf.
"These trouble makers are pulling out books without planning to buy any," the shop clerk said.
"On the contrary I wanted to purchase whichever of these books was written in the last sixteen years so I didn't inadvertently buy a book that is already in my library but your clerk couldn't be bothered to find out if any of them were," Harry said annoyed.
Mr Flourish glanced at the boy, then recognised him not only as the saviour of the wizarding world but as the future head of an old family whose mother had for a time been one of his best customers as she tried to modernise the Potter library, and the boy was also accompanied by one of his best younger customers as well. It wouldn't do to let either of them leave feeling slighted or dissatisfied with the service. "Indeed Mr Potter, your mother did purchase a great many books to bring the Potter library up to date so let's take a look at these," he said placatingly. He went through the books rapidly before shoving three quarters of them back at his shop assistant.
"Re-shelve these, they are not what Mr Potter requested, and in future if you cannot answer a customer's question you need to come and ask me," he ordered in a tone of voice that promised a further scolding once out of customers hearing.
"Yes Sir," the young man slunk away grumbling to himself, and Mr Flourish rang the books up and Harry cheerfully paid the bill.
"Can we take the train home?" Hermione asked hopefully.
"I don't know, would the train deliver us home in time to be there before your parents start to worry?" Harry asked in reply.
"Probably not," Hermione admitted. "In fact, we should go. You'd never realise that we fought a war from the way they were acting this is just about the first time they've let me go out on our own."
"Do they know you fought a battle at the ministry?" Harry asked.
"Well yes, I had to tell them to explain how I almost got cut in half. The wound was still healing and pretty noticeable when we arrived home for the summer," Hermione replied.
"Did you tell them about all our other adventures?" Harry asked.
"No, I was afraid they'd try to pull me out of Hogwarts and send me back to muggle school," Hermione admitted.
"So, as far as your parents know, you fought one battle in which you were almost killed. It's no surprise that they worry, I'm astonished that they let you come to Diagon Alley without them at all," Harry said gently.
"I wish we knew how to apparate or had a floo connection," Hermione said sighing.
"We're going to learn next term," Harry said encouragingly.
-o0o-
Emma arrived home not long after they did. Harry was cooking lunch and beginning the preparations for the dinner he wanted to make the family as a thank you for letting him stay.
"You don't need to cook for my parents Harry," Hermione said. "They don't expect you to become a slave for them in return for a roof over your head."
"I know that Hermione, and I'm not going to offer to do all of the cleaning but I quite enjoy cooking and I don't get a chance at Hogwarts," Harry replied.
"What are you making?" Hermione asked.
"Chicken Cordon Bleu with roasted sweet potato and steamed vegetables, then apple crumble for dessert," Harry replied.
"That sounds lovely Harry, it's a real treat to have the night off cooking thank you. But Hermione is correct we don't expect you to work for you keep," Emma said.
Emma was even more grateful for Harry being busy in the kitchen, giving her the opportunity to talk to her daughter alone while Daniel was still at work. She had been looking for ways to find time alone for a woman to woman conversation. Her little girl was married in circumstances she'd never thought could happen to her and she needed to find out more about how she felt about it and their relationship. She motioned Hermione that she wanted her to come with her.
"I'm going to go talk to Mum for a while. Call if you need help with something," Hermione said.
"Okay Hermione, go have fun with your mum, I'll be fine," Harry said smiling.
"I doubt it will be much fun. Mum's probably going to give me the third degree about our relationship," Hermione said rolling her eyes.
"Call me if you need rescuing," Harry said sympathetically.
Hermione just smiled at him and followed her mother. "Okay Mum, hit me with your questions," Hermione said as they arrived upstairs.
"Hermione," Emma admonished.
"Well wasn't that what you wanted? To interrogate me about Harry?" Hermione said smiling innocently.
Emma sighed. "I just want to make sure you're happy, or as happy as you can be in this situation."
"I am happy Mum. I won't pretend that Harry is the love of my life yet. But he's my best friend and I am starting to care for him that way as well," Hermione said.
"And is Harry starting to care for you that way?" Emma asked.
"I don't know Mum but he seems happy to be with me, and I know he likes kissing me," Hermione said.
"Tell me more about this marriage bond. Is there no way to undo it if the ministry change the law? You're awfully young to make a commitment like that. You'll both grow and change in ways that you can't even imagine at this point in your lives. What if in the end Harry isn't what you want, or you're not what he wants in the end?" Emma asked.
"The bond is permanent Mum. We needed to choose a marriage bond that the ministry couldn't just get rid of and marry us off again to the people they originally chose," Hermione said.
"I just don't want to see you stuck in an unhappy marriage," Emma said sighing.
"Oh I'm not entirely stuck, I can leave Harry if being together is making us miserable enough to prefer being on our own. But we have to give this every possible chance to work because there will never be anyone else for either of us. Even if I leave Harry all my other relationships will be platonic," Hermione said.
"He really cannot cheat on you?" Emma asked.
"No and I can't cheat on him. I can't even get excited thinking that way about anyone else anymore," Hermione said.
"Not even that actor you liked on the television?" Emma asked.
"Not even him or his fictional character. I can still appreciate that he's good looking and objectively recognise that he's hot but that's as far as it goes," Hermione said, pulling a face.
"Will you still bother watching the show?" Emma asked amused.
"Yes of course!" Hermione replied huffing.
"Does the ritual force you to love him?" Emma asked concerned.
"No, I don't think so. I didn't love him any more after the ritual than I did as a friend before it," Hermione replied.
"You do realise that this is going to mean your relationship is probably going to turn sexual sooner rather than later if he has to think of you every time he masturbates," Emma asked.
Hermione blushed. "I'm not ready for that," she said.
"Why not? I know you were just friends until recently but he's a good-looking boy and he obviously thinks the world of you," Emma asked surprised.
Hermione blushed furiously but decided to take the bull by the horns. Her mother was right, Harry would want to move their relationship in that direction and she needed advice. "We had to have sex as part of the ritual and it was horribly uncomfortable," she admitted.
"The first time usually is," Emma replied.
"And the second and third?" Hermione said.
"That depends on what you were thinking and feeling at the time. If you were thinking that it was going to hurt and you were doing it for him and not because you were aroused, then yes it wouldn't be comfortable," Emma said. "I'm more concerned that you weren't honest with Harry about what you were feeling."
"It wasn't like that. I tried the ritual with Ron first, but the bond didn't form so we tried again thinking we might have got the spell wrong or something. The second time I'm absolutely sure we did everything right, the runes and the chant were perfect and the ritual didn't require me to orgasm but nothing happened. We found out later that both people have to honestly want to form a permanent marriage bond for it to work. I did. I was desperate to escape the marriage the ministry arranged for me but I had to admit that Ron didn't want to marry me." Hermione said.
"You don't sound too unhappy about Ron not wanting to marry you now," Emma commented. She had to admit from the little she knew about the red-haired boy from Hermione's letters she was glad that Hermione had ended up married to Harry instead.
"No if anything I'm relieved, I thought I wanted to date Ron but the last month has shown me that Harry and I are better together than Ron and I would've been," Hermione admitted looking surprised by her feelings.
"But Harry did want to marry you. Why didn't you choose him in the first place?" Emma asked.
"I thought he would've wanted to marry his girlfriend," Hermione said.
"Harry was dating someone else?" Emma asked astonished. "And he still agreed to marry you?"
"Maybe he would have, to protect me, but he wasn't with Ginny anymore anyway. They broke up because she refused to try the ritual with him, but I didn't know until after the ritual failed with Ron and I," Hermione said.
"He seems committed to you," Emma said.
"Of course, he does. The ritual makes sure of that," Hermione scoffed.
"But if he was already in love with his ex-girlfriend it's going to make it very difficult for him to fall in love with you," Emma said. She knew proximity would eventually lead to increased feelings of intimacy and may lead to love if they were both open to it but an ex-girlfriend might mean Harry wasn't open to falling in love again and even if he did the ex would always be in his mind as the one-who-got-away.
"I don't think that he was in love. He broke up with her easily enough. He didn't seem at all upset, I didn't even realise they'd broken up until he told me several days later," Hermione said.
"Could that have been because you were so busy worrying about yourself and the ritual with Ron?" Emma asked.
"Perhaps bit I'm sure I would have noticed if Harry was unhappy, he certainly isn't now," Hermione said frowning.
"Because you always notice everything about Harry?" Emma said smirking.
"He's my best friend of course I notice when there's something wrong," Hermione replied defensively.
"What are you going to do if he does love her?" Emma asked.
"He can't love her. The ritual would prevent it," Hermione said.
"Yet you said it didn't force him to love you and it isn't preventing you from loving your father and I is it?" Emma said.
"No but that's different, I love you as my family not romantically," Hermione said.
"So, what you're saying is that you think the ritual would prevent Harry from being in love with this other girl even though it doesn't make him fall in love with you?" Emma said doubtfully.
"Yes," Hermione said rolling her eyes at what she thought should have been obvious.
Emma still had her doubts, even if the ritual prevented Harry from desiring his ex-girlfriend it didn't necessarily mean he couldn't have feelings for her, but she didn't want to push Hermione even more and make her doubt their relationship. That could do nearly as much harm as if Harry really did still have feelings for someone else. Without physical desire those feelings should soon fade to friendship. She had to do some damage control to make sure she hadn't already harmed Hermione's confidence in her bond with Harry.
"You said that you don't think Harry loves you but as you told me happened with Ron, the ritual wouldn't have formed a permanent bond if he didn't want to marry you," Emma reminded her daughter.
"He wanted to save me from the marriage the ministry would choose. Harry has a real saving people thing," Hermione said.
"You're telling me that he wanted to save you so badly that he gave up his future for you but you still don't believe he has feelings for you?" Emma asked disbelievingly.
"We're best friends. He cares about me, just not like you think he does. I hope he will someday but even if he doesn't our friendship will be enough to build a successful life together," Hermione replied.
"Are you sure that he isn't starting to care for you as a girlfriend even if he doesn't love you like a man should love his wife? The two of you aren't just friends anymore. You told me that you were starting to date. Was that Harry's idea?" Emma asked.
"Yes," Hermione admitted.
"Then he wanted to start an actual relationship with you in addition to your friendship," Emma pointed out.
"Yeah but that might be just because I am his only option now," Hermione said pessimistically.
"I don't think so Hermione. Have a little faith," Emma encouraged.
"Okay, but that doesn't solve my problem," Hermione said, humiliated that she had to ask for help with something so personal.
"You need to break the cycle of expecting pain, and try to be relaxed and aroused before you try again. I'm guessing that since penetrative intercourse was required for the ritual you jumped straight to that instead of adequate foreplay to get you in the mood. I would recommend slowly increasing your level of intimacy and talking honestly to each other," Emma said.
"Okay but will it really make a difference?" Hermione asked.
"It will if you can get your head in the right frame of mind and relax your body. If you continue to have discomfort after the next few attempts, I would suggest you try a muscle relaxant and if that doesn't work you need to speak to a doctor," Emma said.
"Or a magical healer," Hermione said. "I don't know that that's something I could bring up with Madam "Pomfrey though."
"Why not?" Emma asked gently.
"She's always so strict and disapproving most of the time when I'm in the hospital wing," Hermione said.
"Have you spent much time in the hospital wing?" Emma asked alarmed.
Hermione blushed as she thought about the huge number of things she had kept from her mother over the years. "Mostly to visit Harry," she said.
Thankfully Emma took the blush as a sign of her confusion about her feelings for Harry not dishonesty and moved on.
"In that case she might have to be strict to limit the number of visitors Harry had when he was ill, he did say that the nurse used to keep him in the hospital wing to make sure he rested. I don't know how much rest anyone would get surrounded by rowdy teenagers," Emma replied.
A/N: Thank you to Millie072, Moonsong78, Guest, J.F.C, Jostanos, jkarr, tyrannicpuppy, Nocte Furorem, Village-Mystic, sandipi, Nanettez, Firehedgehog, ghostcrab311, EvanescoVeritas, Cecily Mitchell, BMS, katmom, starboy454, , mwinter1, N7SPARTAN-Commander-Jay117, Melikalilly, flame55, Rori Potter, rb2312, gabrieljuarezl, Beyondthesea16, Tyler'sPrincess, Noble Korhedron, ShadowWolfLuna, Fallow55, mikanMD and all those who followed and favourited for your support.
