Chapter 5: Piece of Cake
Pit fell onto his bed with a contented sigh. The plush blankets felt even nicer than usual after all the training he'd just done with his twin, and the hot springs had worked wonders on his sore muscles. But a gnawing ache in his stomach reminded him that he couldn't just fall asleep. He wriggled his wings out of the holes in his tank top and glanced over at Dark Pit, who was still toweling off his hair, before curling into himself to ignore the hunger pangs. "Why don't you ask, Pittoo?" he tried. He already knew he was fighting a losing battle. Negotiations were getting nowhere so far.
Dark Pit tossed the towel at his face. "Because you'd be more convincing, you Mama's boy."
Pit pulled it off and balled it up with a frown. He could get irritable when he was hungry. "Hey, you know Lady Palutena's not our mom! Just ask already! I know you're starving as much as I am."
He shrugged. "Yeah, but unlike you, I can handle it. I'd cook something myself, but we're not about to go all the way to the markets to get stuff."
"Last time I asked for ice cream for dinner, she almost put me on a diet!" Pit reminded him. "I'm lucky she forgot about that."
"That was back when you didn't work out at all. You were kind of asking for it," Dark Pit pointed out. "And you're lucky I faked a stomachache so she'd forget about you. Eating nothing but soup for two days straight wasn't fun."
"What do you mean? Lady Palutena makes good soup."
"It was good until I had to skip dessert. You know, I didn't have to bother helping you anyways." Okay, maybe that's true. "It's not like you're even making a stupid request this time. We just want something to eat."
"Okay, fine," Pit resigned. "But you have to save me if dieting comes up again, alright?"
Dark Pit rolled his eyes. "Whatever."
Pit knew exactly where he could find Palutena. Dark Pit followed him until the doors to the main hall of the temple, where he gestured for Pit to go ahead. "Thanks a lot," Pit whispered sarcastically as he opened the door a crack and stepped in. Palutena floated slightly above the ground, eyes closed and glowing staff in hand, with her halo illuminating the area around her. Pit could tell by the smile on her face that she was probably watching over Skyworld or the Earth. He didn't interfere, but glanced back at the door to see Dark Pit irritably motioning for him to approach her. Pit glared back and hissed, "You're not helping!"
"Pit?" He was startled to hear Palutena's voice, and turned around to meet her concerned gaze. "Is everything alright?"
"Lady Palutena! I didn't bother you, did I?" he asked, frantically.
She smiled softly and patted his head. "Of course not, I was just finishing up. What did you want me for?"
Pit leaned against her comfortably. "I was just wondering… when's dinner ready?"
"Pit, it's barely been two hours since we had lunch."
"Really? I don't think I'm going to survive until dinner…"
Palutena laughed. "That's not good. I don't think we have any leftovers, so how about I make you a smoothie or something for now? Oh, and maybe we could bake something! I'm sure that would fix you right up."
"That'd be awesome!" Pit cheered, giving her a hug. "You're the best."
"Now, where's your partner in crime?" she asked, amused. "Pittoo, I know you're there."
Dark Pit peeked into the hall with a smirk. "What did I tell you? Such a Mama's boy." Pit could feel his face reddening as Palutena giggled, but his twin completely ignored him. "You know I'm right. Did you hear yourself? 'You're the best, Lady Palutena!'"
Palutena saved him by changing the subject. "If you two are still so hungry after going for seconds at lunch, I wouldn't be surprised if you were on a growth spurt."
"You think so?" Dark Pit clearly tried– and failed– to hide his enthusiasm, but Pit couldn't care less about masking his emotions.
"Aw, you're both so cute when you're excited!" she gushed. "But yes, a growth spurt coupled with all of your training is the most likely explanation. You've both grown two centimeters since Pittoo moved in, if I remember correctly."
"Just out of curiosity, who's taller?" Pit asked mischievously.
Dark Pit jabbed him. "Are you trying to start something? It's probably a tie. There's no way in hell I'm letting you go on a growth spurt without me."
"Come on, Pittoo! Your wings are sort of longer, and you can fly faster! At least let me win in the height department!"
"You wish!"
As soon as the back-and-forth argument started, Palutena simply turned to leave. "Looks like you two have enough energy to argue. I'm sure you can last until dinner."
That put an end to it right away. Lady Palutena knows us too well. "No no, sorry about that! We'll be helpful, we promise!" Pit called as he and Dark Pit followed her.
"Sure you will," she laughed. "Come on, there's a lot to do!"
Dark Pit eyed his exotic-looking smoothie warily. Palutena's cooking was pretty hit-or-miss, especially when she went out of her way to try something different, but she could be trusted to make a good meal most of the time. Not that any of them were picky eaters anyways. He took a sip of the creamy liquid and was pleasantly surprised. "Pretty good, if you can get past the weird colour."
Pit downed his in one go. "Thanks, Lady Palutena!"
"I'm glad you liked it! I had to find some way to use up all those extra vegetables." She milled around the kitchen, tying an apron over her dress. "Now, what do you want to bake?"
"If we're making sweets, I know how to make churros," Dark Pit offered. Pit stared at him blankly, and he didn't hesitate to continue. This was exactly what he was going for. "Or conchas, or leche frita."
"Why is everything about you so Spanish?" Pit demanded. "Everything you cook, the instruments you play– even your theme."
He didn't suppress his smirk. "No veo el problema con eso."
"Huh?" Pit seemed sort of jealous. Dark Pit knew full well that his Spanish got on his twin's nerves. "Where did you even learn that from, anyways?"
Dark Pit was determined to keep that a mystery. "No soy idiota como tú."
"Come on, I don't have to know any Spanish to get what that means!"
"I could translate, if you'd like," Palutena quipped, flipping through different recipes in their tablet-like recipe book. "But you two are taking too long to make a decision. You know what? We're baking a marble cake."
"Huh?" Pit blinked at her in confusion. "Whatever that is, it sounds tasty!"
"It's part chocolate and part vanilla," she explained, rummaging through the pantry for flour. "The last thing I need is to hear you two argue about the flavour for hours. For people who'd eat just about anything, you sure can be particular sometimes." Maybe Pit was right. She knows us too well.
Dark Pit skimmed through the process in the recipe book which was propped up on the table. "You can take the dry ingredients. Remember what happened last time we sifted… what was that, anyways? Icing sugar?"
Palutena nodded. "I thought there was a blizzard in here," she admitted. "How did you even manage to do that?"
"And it got all over my wings, so I couldn't even eat any!" Pit complained.
Dark Pit crossed his arms smugly. "Well, you could always…" Both of them looked at him expectantly as his voice trailed off. Crap. What was the word? This was why he didn't like switching between languages. His mind was still stuck in Spanish mode, and he could feel a blush coming on in the awkward silence. You know, the thing birds do! There's a word for that! "Forget it," he muttered, directing his irritation at a tile on the kitchen floor. Damn it, that was embarrassing. And I still can't remember that stupid word.
Pit was more than willing to be passive-aggressive. "No no, continue. You'll figure it out eventually. Think I can beat the eggs in the meantime?"
"Shut up," he seethed.
"One point for Pit," Palutena declared. "I hope that evens out the score. Work together, you guys, this is a team effort!"
Dark Pit was about to argue with her when he felt feathers brushing against his arm, and turned to Pit, who was staring intently at a measuring cup as he poured sugar into it. "Here's a tip. If you do get sugar on yourself, don't use the hot springs to clean off. My feathers became all sticky last time."
Palutena burst out laughing, and he couldn't stop himself from joining in. "Didn't you realize that boiling sugar in water makes, I don't know, syrup?"
Pit laughed along with them. "Nope!"
The kitchen felt brighter all of a sudden as they bustled around. Dark Pit had to admit that his twin was pretty good at changing the mood. Not that I'm jealous. He grabbed a pair of eggs and handed them to Pit, who took them hesitantly. "Be useful and crack these. I'll mix later."
A glance at the recipe book told him what to do next. So now we need oil and melted butter, huh? Measuring the oil only took a couple of seconds, but butter was a different story. He could hear Palutena finish sifting together the dry ingredients before he was satisfied with the amount of butter he'd put in a bowl. "We need to melt this," he announced, but frowned at the sight of Pit still carefully tapping the first egg against the side of the bowl. "What the hell are you doing?"
Pit didn't look away from his task. The gentle little clinking sounds were infuriating. "Trying to make sure this doesn't explode like last time! Eggs are really fragile, right?"
"I hope you realize it's never going to work like that," he said dryly, snatching the egg from his twin. "Give it to me."
Pit looked genuinely amazed when Dark Pit cracked both of them cleanly into the bowl, one after another. "How did you do that?" he marvelled, blue eyes shining.
Dark Pit rolled his eyes. He's like an excited toddler. "Don't tell me the captain of the Goddess of Light's army was defeated by an egg."
"Hey, don't say it like that!"
"Fine, I won't tell anyone," he assured, tapping him lightly on the head. "This stays between the three of us. You can count on me. Unlike someone here." Both of them looked at Palutena accusingly.
She stopped, still holding a cup full of buttermilk, and her eyebrows furrowed in confusion. "Hm? Did I do something wrong?"
"Only showing your photography to the rest of the heavens," Dark Pit jabbed, starting the eggbeater and waiting until Pit was paying attention before exploding the yolks. He knew they both found the splash of colour satisfying. "It's mostly stupid pictures of us."
"We're warrior angels. It doesn't help our image," Pit added.
"Your image is perfectly fine, with you two being the only fighting angels in Skyworld," she promised. "Besides, I only show my photos to a select few people. Some of the gods think it's 'admirable' that you have time to train and enjoy yourselves. Their words, not mine."
That was new information. "Really?" Pit asked eagerly. "That's all because of Pittoo. Being the only angel in any army anywhere was kind of lonely."
"Aw, do I make you work too much?" Palutena laughed.
Pit's emphatic "No!" clashed with Dark Pit's quick "Yes." When Pit looked at him in exasperation and Palutena regarded both of them in amusement, he clarified, "Fine, maybe not now. But you really used to overwork him before."
Palutena raised her hands in surrender. "Alright, I accept that, but I hope I'm a changed goddess now. I'll help you directly if we ever have to go to war again." She smiled fondly. "Although honestly, I like it more when we're just spending time together."
Dark Pit wasn't sure what he felt about that, but Pit tried putting it in words. "I kind of like fighting, but I think I like this more. You know, I think I'm fine either way as long as I have you two by my side."
"You guys are such saps," Dark Pit sighed, offering Pit a turn with the eggbeater, which he eagerly accepted. The egg and sugar mixture splattered a bit at first, but he got the hang of it pretty quickly.
Palutena studied the recipe again. "So now all we need is oil, butter, vanilla, and chocolate. I suppose–"
"Preen," Dark Pit said suddenly. He snapped back into reality when he noticed Pit and Palutena staring at him in confusion, without a sound except for the whirring of the eggbeater. He faltered. "That's the stupid word I was looking for. Back when we were talking about icing sugar."
That was a bad idea. Both of them immediately died laughing, and Dark Pit snatched the eggbeater in a huff to make sure Pit didn't spill all of the batter. "That was the singular most random thing I've ever heard you say," Palutena said as soon as she caught her breath.
"I told you you'd get it eventually!" Pit laughed, leaning against him. "We even had time to beat the eggs."
"Glad to hear you find my bilingualism amusing," he said sarcastically. To his own surprise, he didn't mind their laughter as much as he thought he would. Maybe I do like this more than fighting sometimes.
Palutena looked into the small bowl of butter she cupped in her hands, and then back at the angels. "You want me to heat this up for you?" she queried. They nodded almost in sync. "It's not that hard to put it in the microwave, you know."
"But that would take too long! Everything else is ready, so we need this melted quick," Pit explained. "I thought you could just use your powers, or something."
"I suppose I could…"
"And I don't think Pittoo knows how to use the micro–"
Dark Pit shoved his twin to the side. "We're done talking about that. Can you heat it up or not?"
"I'll try," she decided. "Witness my power of melting!"
Pit watched attentively, but Dark Pit gave her a deadpan stare. "That's not a thing."
"Fine, it's just the power to channel heat, but that doesn't have the same ring to it." She started slowly by gradually directing heat through her hands and into the bowl, and all three of them stared at the butter intently. Nothing was happening. I think I'll have to turn up the heat.
Thanks to her so-called power of cooling, her hands only felt pleasantly warm, but something wasn't right. "It's still not melting," Pit pointed out. "Is it warm enough?"
Palutena nodded. "This should be hot enough to boil water in a couple of seconds. I wonder why–"
She barely had time to register the small layer of violently bubbling liquid around the rim before the whole thing exploded. It sounded like a bunch of popcorn kernels bursting, except louder, and much more dangerous. She frantically slid the bowl onto the counter with an alarmed cry, and instinctively activated her power of cooling on the twins as well. That was a good call. When she opened her eyes, she was met with the sight of clumps of butter, unmelted yet sizzling, all over the kitchen– and also on her own skin.
Dark Pit was the first to speak, wiping butter off his cheek. "What the hell?"
"I think it was heated up too fast, so– ah!" Palutena shielded them as the explosions started up again like little firecrackers, thankfully less extreme than before. "Where was I? Oh, right. Maybe it just didn't warm up evenly. You aren't hurt, right?"
"We're fine, but I didn't think butter could explode too!" Pit complained, trying to get it out of his hair and wings. At least they hadn't been using much. Otherwise, it would have been disastrous.
"Anything can be an explosive if you try hard enough," Dark Pit advised, matter-of-factly.
"I would recommend not trying that. How about we just use the microwave instead?" Palutena suggested. "I'll clean up in the meantime."
It took a while to clean up all of the splattered butter, but after a slight mishap where it almost exploded in the microwave as well, they were finally ready to put it all together. Palutena combined the ingredients and split them into two batters, one chocolate and one vanilla, handing one to each angel. "Alternate the batters, and I'll swirl it together at the end," she explained, starting to clean the dishes already in the sink.
As always, it became a competition. "There! Now you're surrounded, Pittoo," she heard Pit declare.
"I wouldn't be so sure," Dark Pit responded. She made a mental note to take some pictures once the dishes were done. For how serious they're being, you wouldn't think they're literally layering cake batter.
"You can't just put chocolate on top of chocolate!"
"Says who? I'm being strategic, unlike you. We don't want the flavours to get mixed up."
"But the whole point of a marble cake is to mix up the flavours!"
Palutena decided to intervene at that point. "Anything is fine. Just finish up your batters, and leave the rest to me."
It turned out that she didn't have to worry about them making the cake uneven. They both watched eagerly as she swirled a knife through the mixture, creating ripples of colour. Once that was done, she placed it in the oven and smiled at the angels. "There we go. Piece of cake. While we let that bake, what do you say to making some icing to go with it?" The answer was obvious: an undisputed yes.
Pit skimmed the bowl of chocolate icing with his finger, grinning mischievously. They'd had to wait until after dinner for the cake to cool, so he deserved to get some fun out of it. "Pittoo!" Dark Pit turned away from helping Palutena coat the cake, and before he could react, Pit smudged some icing on his nose. Perfect.
As expected, he was quick to get annoyed, and Pit dashed to the other side of the counter. "Get back here, you idiot!" Within a couple of seconds, Pit had a streak of icing on his forehead, and they both ganged up on an unsuspecting Palutena.
"Huh? What are you two doing?" she laughed, making a futile attempt at blocking them from getting icing on her cheek.
"If we're going down, you're coming with us," Dark Pit explained.
"Fair enough. Now how about we get the icing where it's supposed to be?"
None of them had enough patience to make it look good, so they were content with slathering it on until the cake was covered. Pit didn't even try stopping Palutena from taking pictures this time. "It looks great!" he said excitedly.
"Then let's see how it tastes." Dark Pit wielded a knife like one of his blades. Pit would never understand how his twin could cut pretty much anything perfectly, but his job was just to make sure that Dark Pit wasn't taking a commission for himself. I wouldn't put that past him. He's tried it a couple of times.
He dug in as soon as Palutena handed him a plate with a slice of cake. He didn't think it could taste even better than it looked, but he was quickly proven wrong. "This is delicious," Pit said dreamily, taking another bite of the swirled dessert. Palutena nodded in agreement, eating another spoonful, and Dark Pit offered a high five, which was pretty unusual of him, so of course Pit and Palutena readily accepted it. Pit relished the cake as much as the whole experience.
Once he was finished, he looked over at his twin. "Hey, Pittoo? Can I steal some of yours?" Dark Pit leaned away from him with a flat "Hell no."
Palutena walked back to the counter with a smile. "We have more than enough cake here for all of us. Who else is up for seconds?" She laughed when both of them held out their plates. "Of course. What did I expect?"
