Chapter 2 Luigi Needs Courage
Luigi wiped sweat off his brow as he adjusted the pipe. This toilet…what was there to be said about it? It was a beast, that's what it was! It wasn't necessarily a difficult job, just a time consuming one. While he hadn't been keeping track of time, he was willing to estimate that he had been at the job for almost six hours. The morning was gone, the chance to catch up and refresh had disintegrated, and any hope Luigi had of supporting his brother in Shroomberg was a pipe dream (no pun intended).
At the very least it was almost over. This long, grueling endeavor was drawing to a close, and both he and Toadette would be all the happier because of it. He just had to tighten this one…last…pipe….
"Whew!" Luigi sat up, reached out, and flushed the toilet. Oh, what a sweet sound it made! The watery rush, made by the vortex washing away everything in the bowl. Was there a sweeter sound in the Mushroom World? Was there a single decibel that carried just as much satisfaction?
"Toadette!" Luigi called out "It's finished!"
Toadette came over to the door with a smile on her face. "Finally!" She laughed. "I almost considered replacing the toilet and installing a new one. I figured doing that would take less time and be much less of a hassle on your part. But then I said to myself 'nah, that baby's still got some life left in it.'" She came into the bathroom and, like Luigi before her, flushed the newly repaired pipe-based mechanism. "Six hours of labor and waiting needed to prove my words right in the end. And BOY was it worth it!"
Luigi sniffed. "Yeah. Worth it." He would have personally preferred the two hour job of installing a new toilet, but hey, that was just him. He picked up his box of tools. "Well, I think I best be off."
Toadette gawked as he made his way over to the front door. "Wait! Don't you want to stay? We can play a card game. Or a tabletop game. Heck, we could play the quiet game if we are feeling ambitious enough."
Luigi pinched his brow with his thumb and forefinger. "Not enough time, not enough hours in the day." He looked toward the door again. "I have things to do."
Toadette sighed. "Very well. But at least let me pay you; that six hours is worth a generous amount of cash."
Luigi sighed in defeat "Fine."
So, he followed Toadette into the kitchen. The little Toad girl dug around in her bag before pulling out a pile of what looked to be about sixty coins in total. Not bad; ten coins an hour was not bad in the slightest.
"Thanks," he said as Toadette deposited them into his hand. Just as he was putting them into his pocket was when his phone chimed from inside the tool box. He got it out, kind of hoping that it was Mario telling him that they still had enough time for their bro hanging out session. It was not Mario though. It was Daisy.
Hey Weegee! Lugi could practically hear her loud, boisterous, joyful voice through the written text. We haven't seen each other for a hot minute; how's it hanging?
Luigi chuckled before raising the phone closer to his face and texting his reply. It's alright. Can't complain.
Toadette raised a curious eyebrow as Luigi texted away. "Who's that?"
Luigi's face turned maroon. "Uh…it's…uh…" He shrunk back a little bit. "It's Daisy."
"Daisy?" Her face lit up like a fireworks display as she gasped. "Oh my gosh, I love Daisy! She hasn't been to the Mushroom Kingdom in forever!" She looked into Luigi's eyes with her glittering ones. "A little birdo also told me that she likes you."
Luigi snickered. "Is that Birdo's name Captain Obvious?"
The phone chimed again. That's good to hear. A few seconds passed by before Luigi got a second message. I really missed seeing you.
Luigi's face turned maroon again, but for a completely different reason. Same with you. Whenever you're in town…he hesitated before typing something that he immediately regretted the second he sent it out. I would love to take you out to a nice restaurant. You deserve it.
Luigi could barely breathe. What was he doing? He had always wanted to ask out Daisy, but he never imagined that the way he would do it would be this direct! On top of that…really? He was asking here over a text message? Talk about informal. In fact, it was worse than informal; it was straight up awkward! And cringy. Oh, so cringy. How would their future kids react to finding out that THIS was how Dad asked out Mom?
Oh dear word. Was he seriously thinking about future kids? There wasn't even a guarantee that Daisy would talk to him after this display, let alone be the mother of his children! It almost felt like he was going to pass out when he finally got Daisy's reply. And when he did, he honest to God couldn't tell if he was really reading what was on the screen or if he had blacked out from embarrassment and was currently dreaming.
That sounds awesome! You know, I am going to be meeting with Peach tomorrow to discuss the Kingdom's infrastructure or some other garbage no one really cares about. As if that wasn't already unbefitting of a freaking princess, she added a little winky face at the end of that sentence, practically causing Luigi's eyes to pop out of their sockets from disbelief. But, when I'm done, I would love to have dinner with you.
Luigi had to summon every last ounce of courage he had in order to reply. Sounds great. It's a date. Once that message was sent, he put his hand to his chest, trying his darndest to not hyperventilate himself into deflating. "Oh my gosh, oh my gosh, oh my gosh!"
"What's wrong?" Toadette asked.
Luigi shook his head, blinking his eyes out and pinching himself on the arm to get confirmation that this was all real. "I just asked Daisy out on a date."
Toadette's eyes grew wide. "And?"
"She…" Luigi laughed, although whether it was because of happiness or terror, he didn't know. "She said yes!"
When those words came out of his mouth, Toadette squeed so loud she could be heard from space. "Luigi!" She pounced on him, pinning him to the ground in an overexcited and over the top hug. "That's amazing! I'm so proud of you."
"Hehe, I'm sure Mario would be proud of me too." He wheezed. "Now, can you get off of me please? I'm having trouble breathing."
Toadette released him from her hold. Even though she was no longer smothering him, she still displayed an excitement that gave her face a radiant shine.
"Seriously, Luigi. You have no idea how happy that news makes me." She laughed, holding her head up high. "Looks like Toad owes me twenty coins!"
Luigi raised an eyebrow. "Wait, you bet on this?" Toadette nodded. "What…what were the conditions of the bet?" His eyebrow rose even higher. "What were the conditions of Toad's victory?"
Toadette hesitated before shrugging. "It's neither here nor there." She jumped up and down. "Besides, that's not important! You're going on a date with Daisy!"
Luigi wiped some dust off of his front as he stood back up. His entire form was tense and stiff. "Yeah." He chuckled quietly. "Hooray me."
Toadette stopped bouncing. "Are you okay? You don't sound very excited about this."
"Welll…." He made the so-so gesture with his hand. "I never really expected to get to this stage of the game." He shrank into the floor a little bit. "Even in my fantasies, the farthest I get is holding Daisy's hand."
Toadette wrinkled her nose. "Wow. That has got to be the saddest thing I've heard in years." She grabbed hold of the green-clad plumber's hand, gently squeezing the fingers. Her face, while it still contained traces of an excited expression, now looked a little worried for his sake and longing for him to find happiness. Of course, that was Luigi's guess. For all he knew, she could be yelling at him in her head for being a massive idiot.
"Yeah." Luigi scratched the back of his head with his free hand. "If I can't even take the next step in my fantasies, how am I going to do it in the real world?" He trembled. "What will happen when she wants to take things to the next level? What will happen when I want to take things to the next level?! What will I do? Will I be stuck in an endless, torturous limbo for the better part of the rest of my life?" His trembling got worse. "Oh Mama Mia, what if she wants to kiss me? What will I do then? What will I…?"
"Luigi?"
Luigi looked back at Toadette. "Yes?"
"Stop it. You'll give yourself a heart attack."
Luigi felt a wave of embarrassment. "Right. Sorry."
Toadette patted his arm. "I'm sure you will be able to do it. All you need to do is put one step forward and be brave."
Luigi nearly scoffed at that word. He wasn't brave. He was the scaredy cat, the one member of the Mario Bro duo that would run away at the drop of the hat. Mario was the brave one. He could battle mighty Koopa Kings and evil demons without so much as batting an eye. He could take down minions and save universes. Yes, Mario was the brave one. Luigi? Not even close.
"I can't do that, Toadette." He pulled himself away from her hold. "That's not me."
There was a moment of quiet, thoughtful consideration before Toadette cleared her throat. "Do you want my help?"
Luigi blinked. "Help? What kind of help?"
"Well, I was thinking maybe I could give you some pointers." The longer she spoke, the more enthusiastic she became. "I could tell you the secrets that are hidden in every girl's head. I could take you out shopping for a nice suit. I could even give you a makeover!" She giggled. "Oh, I can see it now! Luigi; the fresh new ladies man in town! The wooer of princesses, the lovable goofball dressed like a King! Ohhhhh, this is going to be so great!" She looked back into Luigi's eyes. "Provided I have your permission, of course."
Luigi thought about this. In truth, he probably needed all the help he could get. Plus, Toadette was a girl. She knew these kinds of things, she had access to information about girls that Luigi couldn't even dream of getting through experience. He wasn't one to turn down help like this. No way.
"O…okay." He put on a smile that was initially forced, but eventually became more relaxed and real the more time it spent on his face. "I guess that couldn't hurt."
"YES!" Toadette said as she did a fist pump. "It's a deal; you're gonna stop by my house first thing tomorrow!"
"Sounds good." Luigi hoisted his toolbox back up. "Well, see you then."
As quiet and nimble as a mouse, he left Toadette's house. He took in a breath when in the fresh air, both as an act of relief and as a way of clearing his nostrils of any leftover toilet stench. Well, he officially had a plan for tomorrow. Now, with any luck, he could get home to Mario so that the two of them could at least do something…
Ding!
Luigi stifled a groan and pulled his phone out of his pocket. A text from Professor E Gadd, in all caps and with very little punctuation to speak of, appeared on his screen.
LUIGI I NEED YOU DOWN AT YOUR MANSION AS SOON AS POSSIBLE IT'S URGENT!
Luigi felt tremors run up and down his spine. Oh no. Not the mansion. Why oh why did it have to be the stupid, haunted mansion?
