Chapter 15 A Ghost of a Chance
Emerging from the warp pipe was one of the most stressful things Mario had ever done. He looked out at his brother's mansion, casting an unnaturally dark shadow. He took a deep breath. He could do this. He was Super Mario, after all. Sure, he didn't look like Super Mario, and more importantly, he didn't feel like Super Mario either. He just felt like a normal guy with an unnatural fear of the paranormal. But he needed to do this. He needed to prove to himself that he could.
So, he took a step. He noticed E Gadd, sitting on a tree stump with a computer on his lap. Honestly, Mario never really took the time to know E Gadd outside of what was superficial and obvious. To him, the professor was just the stereotype of absent-minded and eccentric, nothing more. So, if nothing else, this experience could be interesting because he could get a better grasp on Elvin's character. Heck, since he was in Luigi's body, he could see how E Gadd interacted with people who he knew and was comfortable with.
When he got close enough, he heard E Gadd mumbling to himself as he leaned over his…very odd laptop. Every once in a while, he would giggle, which made Mario's preconceptions about him feel all the more real. He almost didn't want to approach Elvin, as he felt interrupting him during what was clearly a time spent in his own little world could be less than ideal.
Despite that, Mario still went up and tapped E Gadd on the shoulder. E Gadd turned toward him, smiling like a clown.
"Luigi! Good of you to make it, dear boy!" His face fell almost immediately. "Say, where's your Poltergust?"
Mario blinked. "My…" oh dear word. He forgot the Poltergust? The most important thing that Luigi always brought along with him when he went on ghost hunts? Oh boy, he could tell that this was going to be fun already.
"I…I completely forgot about it. Sorry."
E Gadd raised an eyebrow. "It's highly unusual for you to be this lackadaisical when it comes to your ghost hunting equipment." He adjusted his glasses. "You do realize that the poltergust is the only thing those rotten ghosts fear, right?"
Mario sighed. "I know." He turned back to the warp pipe. "I'll…I'll go back to my house and retrieve it." Hey, a blessing in disguise! The longer Mario took getting the vacuum, the more he could hold off facing that dreadful boohemoth! He had more time to mentally prepare himself for this whole endeavor.
Unfortunately, a beep went off on E Gadd's computer. He turned back toward it, his expression rising with awe and caution.
"E gadd!" said E Gadd. "It appears that the boohemoth is attracting more boos into the mansion as we speak!"
As if that was some kind of cue, a low, distorted, unworldly laugh came from the mansion. The sound caused Mario's arms to tingle, his mouth to let out an inadvertent whimper. E Gadd furiously typed on the computer so he could get a full, accurate scope of the mansion's interior.
"At the rate this is going, all the boos in the kingdom will be here in less than half an hour!" He turned toward Mario. "I'm afraid you don't have time to go back to your house; we need to deal with this threat as soon as possible!"
Mario's heart skipped a beat. "What?" he started to sweat. "But…but…how am I going to take care of the ghosts without the poltergust?"
"Simple," E Gadd said. He turned toward a car that Mario just now realized was parked there. He opened it up, rummaged around, and pulled out another poltergust.
This caused Mario to blink. "Wait, you were making a big deal out of the vacuum when you had another one stashed in your car?"
E Gadd gave him a dry look. "This dear sir, in case you've forgotten, is the Poltergust 3000; the old model. While effective, it isn't nearly as effective as using your Poltergust G-00." He handed it to Mario. "I don't know how well this will act when taking on a sizable monster such as a boohemoth. However, it is all we got." He cringed. "So, I guess you'll have to 'wing it,' as they say."
Mario gulped. Great. He was going to carry a potentially inefficient weapon. While he had been afraid before, he was feeling a million times worse now. Why did Luigi have to make that wish?
"Well, what are you waiting for?" E Gadd asked. "Strap this puppy on your back and get cracking!"
With trembling hands, Mario took the Poltergust. He immediately noticed how heavy it was; it felt like he was holding a bag full of bricks. The sensation only became less tolerable when he strapped it on his back. The weight was so great that Mario felt like he was going to snap his brother's spine.
"O…okay." Mario took a deep breath, standing up as straight as the Poltergust would allow him to. "I guess there's nothing left to do but…go in the mansion."
"Precisely!" After handing him a walkie talkie, E Gadd pushed him toward the haunted building. "Chop chop my boy; those ghosts are becoming a bigger threat as we speak!"
Mario nodded. With his heartbeat pounding in his mouth, he crept toward the mansion. The closer he got, the more audible the laughter of the boos became. It was awful, borderline demonic. Mario started getting flashbacks to his encounters with King Boo just by listening to them. He wanted to turn back. He wanted to turn back so badly, in more ways than one.
But he knew he couldn't. As E Gadd said, the house was becoming more and more haunted by the second. He needed to take care of it. The only question now was…could he?
As if his brain was rushing to provide him with an answer to that question, Mario thought back to his time with Daisy. She said that she believed in him. Well, to be more accurate, she said she believed in Luigi. And…well, Luigi was usually able to deal with threats like this. Sure, he remained a complete scaredy cat throughout the various times he had thwarted King Boo and his minions. But…in reality, that just was more of an argument as to how Luigi was a brave person. He conquered his fear every single time, always stepping into these sorts of situations despite every alarm bell in his head ringing at full volume. So, if Luigi could be brave, so he could Mario. Mario could brave these ghosts. He could suck them up in Luigi's vacuum just as well as his brother did. So, letting out another deep breath, he pushed the mansion doors open.
Creak.
Mario coughed. Man, this mansion sure was dusty. If the encounters with the boos didn't kill him, then his allergies would. He made his way in, turning his head this way and that. He had to keep his eyes peeled. The second that he let his guard down was guaranteed to be the second that a boo decided to jump out of the walls and attack.
"How goes it, dear boy?"
Mario shrieked before it occurred to him that that voice belonged to E Gadd, talking over the walkie talkie. Mario pressed the button and put it to his mouth.
"Haven't encountered anything quite yet."
"I see," E Gadd said, his voice crackly with static. "Well, if nothing else, look for the boohemoth and try to thwart that. If you get rid of the alpha boo, the other boos are bound to leave the building."
"Copy that," Mario said with a nod that he knew the professor couldn't see. He put the device back in his pocket and continued on his trek through the mansion. Even with the terrifying boo laughs, he had to admit that the interior of the mansion was pretty impressive. The way that the interior was decorated in particular; it looked like either Luigi spent a fortune hiring the best interior decorators in the kingdom, or he just had a good eye for this sort of thing himself. Either way, the mansion looked lovely.
Ha ha ha!
Mario gasped. There were two boos; one pick, one white. He brandished the Poltergust, keeping the nozzle aimed at the two abominations. It was as he did that he realized something important and horrifying.
He didn't know how the Poltergust worked.
"Oh no…" he shook, trembled actually. "Oh no, oh no, oh no." He scanned the device, hoping he could lay eyes on a button; any button. He saw a red one and pressed that.
Big mistake. He shot backwards at speeds that would make a falcon envious. He screamed as he flew backwards, ultimately stopped in his tracks by a bookshelf. The books toppled down on top of him, landing either on his legs or on his head. One particularly heavy volume landed on the red button, causing the blowing feature to turn off.
"Mama Mia…" Mario said. He stood up, locking his gaze on the boos. They stuck their tongues out at him and closed in on him. Very different from boos' usual behavior; Mario reasoned it was because they had a powerful alpha and were in the company of many of their brethren.
"Luigi!" E Gadd yelled. "Are you okay?"
The Professor must have seen his screw up on the laptop monitor, Mario reasoned. He grabbed the walkie talkie.
"Yeah, I'm okay." He looked back down at the vacuum. "Just…trying to figure out how to use the Poltergust."
There was silence on the other end, no doubt because E Gadd was gawking that "Luigi" would forget how to use his precious weapon.
"I see," E Gadd finally said. "It has been a while since you've used this model, after all. Push the blue button; that should help you suck up the ghosts."
"The blue button…" Mario muttered. His eyes scanned over the device until he found the button. He smiled; he imagined this relief and happiness would be equivalent to finding the tree of life. "Thanks, E Gadd."
"Of course," the professor replied. "Now hurry along, dear fellow! It seems that more ghosts are coming your way!"
Sure enough, three more boos emerged from the walls. Mario swallowed a lump and stood up, brandishing the vacuum. He pressed the blue button, the result pretty much immediate. A powerful suction force grabbed the boos by the tails. The little monsters struggled against it, but they were no match for the suction. They all wound up in the vacuum, forever locked away from the world that they desired to haunt.
Once they were gone, Mario let out a breath. "Well…" he smiled. "That was easier than I thought it would be!" He laughed. "Makes sense that Luigi would be willing to do this if he has the Poltergust by his side." The vacuum rumbled a little, causing him to shriek and jump to his feet. "Um…looks like I should find that boohemoth."
He continued his trek through the building, practically tip toeing in order to prevent more boos from discovering him. He made his way up the stairs, his gut telling him that the best place to look would be the bedroom. He slowly turned the bedroom door's knob, trying to mentally prepare himself for the sight that he potentially was going to see. Even with that action, he nearly jumped out of his brother's skin when the door was open.
What looked like one hundred boos danced in a circle around a humongous boohemoth. The ghost easily took up half the bedroom, which was impressive considering the room itself wasn't tiny in the least. The beast laughed, causing more tingles and shivers to return to Mario's being. He tried to tell himself to go forward. He had the Poltergust with him. He had E Gadd available n the walkie talkie to give him assistance. He could do this. Luigi did this, so could he.
Of course, Luigi himself had been afraid enough to postpone this ghost hunt to today instead of dealing with it yesterday. Even with that revelation in mind though, Mario didn't back down. He couldn't back down. He was Super Mario; Super Mario didn't back down.
"Say night night, ghosties." He pressed the blue button on the Poltergust, causing almost every boo in the room to shriek. They tried to escape from their doom, but they all got sucked up. Within minutes, the only ones in the room were Mario and the boohemoth.
This caused Mario to laugh with confidence. He dealt with hundreds of tiny boos. If that wasn't equivalent to dealing with one giant one, he didn't know what was. He aimed the vacuum at the boohemoth. Unfortunately, it didn't get sucked up. Mario blinked, his fear returning.
"Why…why isn't this working?"
E Gadd sighed over the walkie talkie. "This wouldn't be an issue with the Poltergust G-00." His tone grew more serious. "You need to get closer, Luigi."
Mario's blood froze. "Get closer?" His hands trembled. "Uh…okay." He took tiny, careful steps toward the monster. Said monster looked at him with a wicked amusement, as if he was a mouse that it had trapped in a maze. Mario didn't let this bother him, though. He couldn't.
"Okay," Mario said when he was close enough. "Boohemoth, I think it's time for you to…"
Before he could say anymore, the boohemoth opened its mouth and licked him. With the protoplasmic saliva covering him, Mario's entire being shook. His surroundings grew dark. His blood ran cold. He fell to his knees, then to his back as the cold, slimy fluid spread down his side. His entire life flashed before his eyes. When the boohemoth licked him again, it felt like his very soul was being extracted from Luigi's body in very large chunks.
"Luigi! Luigi!"
That was the last thing Mario heard before blacking out.
