Chapter 19 Nutty Professor

The brothers exchanged a look as they stood outside the professor's abode. Mario shook, but Luigi guessed that was more likely because of the boohemoth lick than actual fear. After all, what was there to be afraid of? E Gadd more than likely was capable of fixing this. Heck, he could probably do it within the hour! There was nothing scary about this, instead, this situation was comforting and reassuring.

Luigi took a deep breath. "Well…shall we go in?"

Mario nodded. "That'd be smart." He took a step toward the house. "The sooner we get switched back, the happier I'll be."

Luigi nodded, agreeing with his brother with every fiber of his being. He took some steps toward the house, the anticipation building like a symphony building toward a crescendo. His mind thought about what possible methods the professor would use to switch them back. Brain surgery? A brain transplant? Well, if that was what E Gadd was going to do, Luigi definitely wanted out. He wasn't super intelligent, but even he realized that brain transplants were risky because…well, no one had done one successfully. Sure, E Gadd was a genius, but Luigi wasn't going to trust him THAT much. Plus…okay, maybe a brain transplant was more unlikely than Luigi had originally projected; E Gadd wasn't a surgeon, after all. So, thankfully, Luigi could sweep that possibility under the rug.

But that still didn't answer the question as to what exactly E Gadd was going to. More than likely he was going to build a device, but what kind? A brain switching helmet? A magic blender that switched up the brains of the people who stepped in it? Okay, THAT actually sounded a little painful. Luigi hoped that wouldn't be the case. He would place his bets on a brain switching helmet though (provided that it didn't electrocute them).

When the brothers got to the door, Mario lightly tapped on it. There was no answer, which confused Luigi as E Gadd's car was parked in the driveway. Mario knocked harder, but there was still no answer. He increased the intensity to a banging. Still, no response.

Luigi held back a frustrated groan. "What in the world is he doing?"

"Beats me." Mario tried the doorknob, which miraculously revealed that the door wasn't locked. Mario blinked. "Well. That worked." He looked at his brother as he opened the door. "I sure hope that E Gadd doesn't have anybody break into his house anytime soon."

"Yeah," Luigi said with a snicker. He stepped into the house. "For someone as intelligent as E Gadd, you'd think that he'd have more effective security measures…"

ERR ERR ERR!

Luigi shrieked and jumped into Mario's arms. Both of them trembled as an alarm above the door blazed away, giving anybody who wasn't hard of hearing a splitting headache. It was like a fire alarm in a school except…worse. It was SO much worse, as Luigi felt like he was going to go deaf if the alarm didn't go off within the next five seconds.

Thankfully, it did. The screechy frequency came to a rest as Luigi heard somebody scrambling to get to the door.

"My goodness gracious!" The Professor yelled. He had what looked like night vision goggles over his eyes as he approached. "If you're one of those pesky girl scouts, then I say begone! The calories in those cookies of yours are enough to kill…" he lifted his head and gasped. "Oh! You're the Mario brothers!" He smiled and removed the goggles, wiping them with a handkerchief he pulled from his pocket. "Pleasant seeing you here, gentleman!"

Luigi let out a breath and stepped out of his brother's hold. "E…E…E Gadd…what in the ever blazing, heckling heck was that?"

E Gadd raised an eyebrow. "What else is a screeching sound activated by breaking and entering supposed to be; it's an alarm, Mario!" He sniffed. "I installed it last week; it's bound to keep any unwelcome guests from coming in!" He smiled. "It's even loud enough to scare bears away!"

"Of that, I have no doubt," Mario said. He wiped his forehead. "Well, do you mind if we come in, Elvin? There's something we need your help with."

"Oh! Of course, of course!" He gestured for them to enter. "Come in, come in; I'll get some tea brewing and some snacks baking!"

The brothers exchanged another look before going in. Honestly, in all his years of having E Gadd help him combat boos and ghosts, Luigi had never really been inside his house. He had seen the exterior of it, sure, but the interior had always remained a mystery to him. So, he was actually excited to see what E Gadd's living environment looked like.

Unfortunately, his excitement faded away and was replaced by concern and disgust the moment he stepped into the living room. It was Filthy, with a capital F! Clothing (specifically lab coats and underwear) lay draped over the couch as if they were being used to create a long, flowing cape for the seat. The floor was littered with garbage, ranging from just some harmless things like candy wrappers and empty chip bags to some very concerning stuff like rotting food and…toxic waste? Luigi did a double take upon seeing that. It was right there out in the open, sitting in a barrel that had the radioactive symbol plastered on it. Luigi backed away; that green sludge's glow would stick with him for years to come (maybe even literally if he ended up getting too close).

"Hurry up, hurry up!" E Gadd called out. "Try not to get too frazzled by the mess; I have neglected the process of house cleaning!"

"Understatement of the century," Mario said. He cringed upon stepping on what looked like some moldy pizza crust. "Man, I hope that no social services step in here."

"I actually do want that," Luigi objected. "Might help E Gadd get his act together."

"True." Mario smiled a little. "This whole place makes our house look like a castle." He snickered. "Makes me wonder if we can get thrones to place in our living room."

Luigi chuckled at that. They made their way deeper into the house, hoping that they wouldn't encounter anything too messy or dangerous. They were both relieved to see that the kitchen was considerably less of a disaster area in comparison to the living room. That wasn't saying much, but at least the place was tidy enough to justify it being the room where food could be prepared.

"Take a seat, boys," E Gadd said as he waited in front of the oven. "Refreshments will be available shortly."

Both brothers took a seat at the table. The wait for their food wasn't long at all, as the tea kettle whistled and the timer on the oven went off within about two minutes. E Gadd grinned as he removed the kettle from the heat and took his tray of goodies out of the oven. Luigi licked his lips when he saw that the goodies in question were chocolate chip cookies.

"Well well," he said. He got a spatula and placed the cookies on a plate. "Nothing like the sweetness of a pastry to get the day going." He brought the plate and kettle over along with two mugs. He poured the hot water into said mugs, placing the teabags into the mugs when he finished. "Enjoy, my boys."

"Thank you," Mario said. He grabbed a cookie and took a bite. His face contorted into a cringe when he did. "Mama Mia!" He spit the cookie out. "What's in that?"

"Oh, just a few veggies I plucked form my garden," E Gadd said. "Eggplant, zucchini, brussel sprouts…they're all said to be beneficial to your health."

Mario gagged and took a sip from his tea. He spit that out too. "What…what…"

"It's a mixture of my own invention," E Gadd said. "It contains the essence of ketchup and scrambled egg…a good thing to put into liquid form for those who have trouble chewing."

Luigi cringed. Nasty. Nasty, nasty, nasty. E Gadd sounded like someone who needed to learn that "healthy" didn't always translate to "tasty."

"I…think I'll pass," Mario said as he pushed his cup away.

"Eh, that's fine; even I'll admit that tea flavor is an acquired taste." He took a seat at the table as well. "So, what brings you two here?" He looked right at Mario. "I imagine that you're still recovering from the boohemoth lick, aren't you Luigi?"

Mario shuddered when E Gadd asked that. "Yeah, I am." He rubbed his arms, as if that sentence ignited a chilly sensation for him. "It's…it's a slow recovery, that's for sure."

E Gadd's brow furrowed. "I believe that it's going to be a while before you step into your mansion again due to this affliction." He bit his lip. "However, I believe it would also be a lot more beneficial to your health and make your recovery a lot more speedy if you spend time resting in your house."

Mario let out a breath. "Well…that does sound like a nice proposition, I'll admit." He cringed as he shuddered some more. "However, Luigi and I have a problem that we need you to take care of."

E Gadd did a double take before chuckling a little. "I'm sorry, dear boy, but did you just say 'Luigi and I?'" His chuckling increased in intensity. "Are you perhaps suggesting that you are, in fact, Mario instead of Luigi?"

Mario had the most serious of serious expressions when he responded. "Yes, that's exactly what I'm saying."

E Gadd burst into laughter. He hugged his sides, laughing so hard that it actually looked painful. "Oh my goodness gracious me, that is one of the most ridiculous things I've ever heard!" He wiped a tear from his eye as he looked at Luigi. "Please tell me your brother is joking, Mario!"

Luigi shook his head. "He's not joking, Elvin. I'm Luigi. And he's Mario." He frowned. "The two of us swapped bodies."

E Gadd just continued laughing when he heard that. "Swapped bodies…classic!" He almost fell out of his chair. "Man, I didn't know I needed a belly laugh like that today!"

Luigi sighed. Seemed like convincing E Gadd of their predicament was going to be harder than it looked.

"Except we aren't joking! I am Luigi!" He stood up. "I made a wish on a shooting star a few nights ago, and we woke up swapped the next morning!" He looked as serious as the plague as he looked right into E Gadd's eyes. "We're telling the truth, Professor!"

Finally, E Gadd stopped laughing. "The truth, huh?" He gave Luigi a stare serious enough to rival Luigi's death stare. "Well then, prove it. Tell me something that only Luigi and I would know."

Luigi froze for a second before putting his finger to his chin. "Hmmm…" he thought long and hard about this before smiling. "I know!" He actually grinned a wicked grin as he looked into E Gadd's bespectacled eyes. "One time, when you were in your late teens, you considered getting a master's degree in botany instead of a PhD in the science of boos. However, you quickly changed your mind when a piranha plant ate both your clothes and your favorite stuffed toy Edgar the Alligator, whom you have slept with since you were a baby all the way up until that day when you were nineteen years old!"

E Gadd's eyes grew wide. His jaw dropped as he stared at the younger Mario brother. "You…you….?" He flushed. "That's my most embarrassing secret! How did you…?"

"Wait, you think that's embarrassing?" Mario asked. "Honestly, I don't think it's too bad. I slept with a stuffed penguin until I was twenty three."

"Oh yeah!" Luigi grinned at his brother. "Emperor Tux! You got him as a Christmas present from Grandmama!"

"Indeed." Mario smiled. "Best Christmas memory I have to this day."

E Gadd, meanwhile, still looked at Luigi in awe. "You…you really are Luigi." He looked at Mario. "Which can only mean you are the true hero of the Mushroom Kingdom!"

Luigi felt a pang when that was said, but he tried to push it away. "Yes. I am Luigi, and he's Mario."

"And we need your help, E Gadd!" Mario exclaimed. "We've been stuck like this since yesterday!"

"Y…y…yesterday?" E Gadd's eyes grew wider. "You mean…the person in the hospital…the person who battled the boohmeoth…"

"That was Mario," Luigi said, his face falling. "We tried to keep the swap a secret because we thought we were gonna switch back today. However…well, that clearly didn't work."

E Gadd gawked at Mario. "To think…the person who has been trapped by King Boo was now battling boos." He smiled. "I must say, you certainly did a good job for your first time, Mario."

"Thanks," Mario said. He pressed his palms down flat against the table. "But that's not important right now. E Gadd, do you have anyway you can swap us back."

E Gadd blinked. "Hmm…" he spent a good time thinking about this. "Not at the moment, I'll admit." He smiled. "I do believe, however, that I can invent a device that might help you boys out."

"Really?" Luigi asked. He smiled. "That's great!" His face fell back down; collapsed, actually. "Do you think you can get started on it? I want to be back in my body ASAP."

"Me too," Mario said.

E Gadd thought some more about this. "I…I think I might have all the necessary materials in my house…" he smiled at the brothers in a reassuring way. "I will certainly try to fix your problem!" He turned toward the door. "Just give me about an hour or two to build!" With that, he exited.

The Mario brothers exchanged one last look. Luigi took in a shaky breath as Mario trembled. Man, he really hoped this would work…