Author's Note: Hello, everyone! Chapter Three to this story was recently rewritten and reuploaded! The dialogue was reworked a lot, but again, no major plot points were changed. I'm currently furthering my education while working full time so please forgive me for not updating much these past couple months. I've finally had time to write recently. I even put another story out with a few chapters already posted (it's in the Hunger Games universe, so if that interests you, go check it out!)
Thank you for the follows/favorites/reviews. I know this story has been a long time in the making, but I'm still progressing with it, slowly but surely!
Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight - not even a tiny little bit. I do, however, lay claim to my own thoughts/plots/OCs!
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Chapter Thirteen
Leah sat on the swing, kicking her legs out in front of her. The elementary playground was empty, no one else around.
She needed to get away from everyone for a while - just for a little while - and think. So much was suddenly happening, it was hard to know whether she was making the right decisions or not. Sam, Paul, the Cullens, Jacob, Nessie, the army headed their way any day now - what was the right way to deal with those things?
When she was younger, she used to think she knew everything. Of course, realistically, she had known very little. Still, the truths known to her were set so confidently in stone that she always seemed to know what to do. It all seemed to come so easy to her back then - the ability to make a choice and know it was the right one.
The black haired little boy cried, fat tears dripping down the steadily swelling right side of his face.
"Her - she did it!" he wailed, pointing a chubby finger. A wizened, stern looking teacher stood beside him sighed. She shook her head in exasperation once she found the identified culprit.
"Leah Clearwater, come over here right now."
Leah peered from the top of the slide as the scene below. The boy she just knocked to the ground moments ago, with a single punch, had gone and snitched on her to Mrs. Tiger.
Her friends, waiting at the ladder below to go down after her, all shifted and whispered nervously. The eight year old girl ignored them, slipping down the slide to the gravel below.
The dress her mother sent her to school was currently covered in numerous stains, but this time it wouldn't be the dirt on her skirt that landed her in hot water.
She walked over to the annoyed teacher, holding her chin high.
"Yes, Mrs. Tiger?"
The gray haired lady gestured to the sniveling boy at her side. "Timothy Green has a wallop the size of Texas on his face. Would you know anything about that?"
Despite the tears in Timothy's brown eyes, he managed to smirk. He knew she was going to be in trouble - big trouble.
She wasn't scared of him. She wasn't scared of Mrs. Tiger. She wasn't scared to admit to the truth.
"Yes," she answered simply.
The woman huffed, clearly frustrated. "This is the third time you've gotten into a fight this year, Miss Clearwater. Do you have anything to say for yourself?"
This would be another one of the many phone calls made to her parents about her behavior.
She felt justified in almost each and every one - including this one.
"He deserved it."
Their teacher gasped, her mouth falling wide open.
"Why you little-"
Her teacher had been angry with her, but her mother was even more so. Once Leah came home from school, she received more than an earful from Sue. Despite the adults around her branding her the villain, she had been so sure she was the hero. As the day wore on, she held her conviction in that belief despite any punishment it brought.
It was much later that day, while settling into bed, her father asked why she had done it.
"You know you should never resort to violence, Leah," he sighed, sitting down onto the edge of her bed. His heavy body dipped the mattress down around him. He looked like a giant to her, especially on her tiny bed, in her tiny bedroom.
"I know, daddy," she said with a sigh, a little tired from all the different people scolding her today.
"Then why, sweetheart?" he asked, bushy eyebrows furrowed. "Why did you hit that boy?"
She crossed her arms, setting her mouth into a thin line. "Because he deserved it."
"Leah, look at me," he ordered her gently. She wanted to disobey. She didn't. Despite being a stubborn child, she usually did what her father asked. He was her most favorite person in the world and having to face his disappointment felt worse than facing anyone else's. His dark eyes gazed into her own. "Why did he deserve it?"
There was passion to her words as she explained. "He pushed Mary off the swingset and made her cry." Her elbows were scraped and bleeding, gravel and dirt in the flesh. As if that wasn't a bad enough course of action on its own, Timothy then proceeded to laugh and torture the sobbing girl. "He was calling her names and saying that her mom left because she was a big crybaby."
Her father was quiet for a long moment.
As strong willed and as confident as Leah was, she couldn't help but feel unsure, if only for a split second. There was nothing else in this world she wanted more than her father's approval.
If it cost her that to be a hero then she wasn't sure if she was strong enough to be one.
"I see," he finally said, his voice quiet.
She looked at his face, unsure of the expression there. "Are you-" Leah hesitated, suddenly nervous. "Are you mad at me too, daddy?"
The lines of his face softened and she felt relief when he shook his head.
"No, Leah. I'll never be mad at you for protecting someone who can't protect themselves." She found solace in her fathers words, taking comfort in the fact that she had indeed done the right thing. "But next time, go tell the teacher. I don't want you getting in trouble, okay?"
It was a hard command to follow. Justice didn't always move swiftly or fairly, as she had already been taught a great many times in her few years. If she decided not to take action herself, sometimes there was no action taken at all.
Leah Clearwater wanted nothing more than to make her father proud, so she decided that she would try her best.
"Okay, I will next time, I promise," she vowed, nodding her head.
"Good. I'll talk to your mother later. You're not grounded anymore, but make sure to remember what I told you, alright?" He reached a large hand toward the bookshelf by her bed. "Now, what story would you like to read tonight?"
Of course, there were many incidents similar to that one over the years. She tried to heed her father's words, but it wasn't always possible. Regardless, she always did what she felt was right, even if she was punished for it.
Back then, she pictured herself a superhero that would come flying in to save someone, never needing saving herself. The bad guy was always beaten, the good guy came out on top, and the innocent bystander was saved.
Leah Clearwater never thought of herself as the person that needed to be saved. Even after everything that had happened to her throughout the years, she never thought that it was someone else's responsibility to rescue her. And if it was herself that needed to be rescued, then she was the only one who could - and would - do the job. If she failed, then she would pick herself up and try again, because there was no one else coming to her rescue.
It didn't feel right for it to be any other way.
She was the superhero and the superhero never needed saving. It didn't feel right to have everyone protecting her - risking their lives for her. It didn't feel right to sit on the sidelines, waiting for someone else to fight her battle for her. It didn't feel right, not shouldering this burden as equally as the rest of her pack was.
But this wasn't something she could run away from. This wasn't something she wanted to run away from - not this time.
She wanted to help. She wanted to fight. She wanted to be useful.
Sam disagreed. The she-wolf didn't have the ability to defy him, despite it not being an Alpha order. She had made him a promise. She would follow him - without question. That was their deal.
For now, Leah was playing the part of the damsel in distress. It was a label she never wanted to associate with herself, but it was one she would have to wear.
She wasn't allowed to patrol or go outside of the Reservation. As much as they needed the manpower, it was too much of a risk to put her on the frontlines. She was the prize to be won. If they managed to take her away, Sam would have nothing left to leverage.
Her job was to wait until the day of the big battle, then act as bait. That was her responsibility.
"Hey."
Leah didn't bother to turn her head, having already sensed the presence nearby.
"Hey," she said. The metal chains of the swing set clanked and rattled as someone took the abandoned seat beside her. "How did you know I was here?" she asked.
Paul chuckled. "I didn't, actually." She finally looked at him, noticing the dark circles under his black eyes. "I caught your trail in the woods earlier - followed it here."
She nodded, feeling suddenly self-conscious for some reason.
"You were looking for me," Leah realized. She turned away, regretting her next question before even asking it. "Do you need to talk to me about something?"
"Yeah, I do," Paul admitted. He sighed, heavy and long. "I have something to say to you." There were a lot of things they needed to discuss, but none of them were easy to talk about. She prepared herself for the worst, whatever it may be. "I'm sorry."
Leah furrowed her brow, not expecting that.
"For?"
He smiled faintly. "For how we ended things - up on the cliffs."
Leah tensed. She knew this conversation was long overdue, yet dreaded having it anyway.
"Paul, I-"
He shook his head, cutting her off. "Hold on. Before you say anything, just let me say this." He took a deep breath, his fingers wrapping around the chains on either side of the swing. "I know it was stupid of me to do something like that. I knew it then and I still did it. I guess I just…" He looked at her, trailing off. She couldn't help but feel like there was something deep within his eyes when he looked at her. As hard as she tried to decipher what it was, she couldn't. "I just got caught up in the moment."
Leah took a minute to reflect over his words. Something about his explanation left her feeling disappointed, but she wasn't sure why.
"Yeah," she said quietly, thinking about that day on the cliffs. "Me too." She waited to see if he would say anything else, but he didn't, so she decided she needed to. "You asked me what I wanted from you. I didn't know how to answer you then… I never meant to lead you on-" She stopped, swallowing. For some reason, even though she was sure her words were the truth, they fell from her lips the same as a lie would. "I don't want anything from you, Paul. If I want anything at all, it's your friendship. I'm sorry." Leah cleared her throat, careful not to look at him. "And I'm sorry - for running away."
"Don't worry about it, Clearwater," he said easily, not seeming offended by her turning him down. She felt relieved that there was no anger hidden in his voice. She'd been afraid that he would go back to hating her as much as he once had. "Let's stop with all the apologies now, it looks like we both learned our lesson."
"Okay," Leah agreed. She knew it was a mistake to get involved with Paul - with anyone - especially now. Still, a part of her was regretful over what could have been. Had they both been born into different lives, as different people, things could have been different. If vampires never existed, if werewolves weren't necessary, if her heart had never been broken-
She cleared those thoughts out of her head. They were pointless. Nothing could change the past and nothing would change their future.
"So, are we good now?" he asked after a moment of quiet.
"We're good, Paul." Leah gave him a hint of a smile. "Friends?" she suggested.
"Friends," he repeated after her. She was satisfied with that agreement - she would have to be. That was all they could ever be to each other - friends and packmates. "But you got to stop challenging me to races that you already know you're gonna win," he joked.
She cracked a grin at him. "No promises."
Paul chuckled, shaking his head. "Should have known better than to ask - you're too stubborn for that." He stood, smiling down at her. It was like looking at sunshine, warm and comforting in the overcast sky. "Have you phased yet?"
She frowned.
"Not yet."
He furrowed his brow, seeming concerned. "You know we're training with the Cullens tomorrow."
She grimaced. "I know."
Their Alpha had met with the vegetarian vampires two days ago, coordinating plans of attack and training schedules, with Jacob and Paul also in attendance.
"So?" he inquired, raising an eyebrow.
"So," she sighed, standing up. "I guess this is as a good time as any."
Paul seemed surprised. "Really? Right now?" She started walking for the forest, the answer to his question clear. "Do you want me to leave you alone?"
She faltered in her steps, hesitating.
It was dangerous to allow Paul to hear her thoughts, but in the coming days they would be on full blast for not only him, but everyone else in the pack (as well as Edward). She might as well make the leap now.
"No," Leah finally said, resuming her walk. "I think I would like some company." She heard as he caught up to her. She glanced once at him, taking comfort in his presence once more.
Her first phase was hectic and traumatizing. None of the wolves were particularly helpful, mostly because she refused to allow them to help her. She couldn't help thinking that it might be nice to have a friend around this time.
It might be nice letting someone help her. Maybe someone would come to her rescue, for a change.
Even if that person was Paul Lahote.
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Paul walked beside Leah, feeling nervous.
He was glad they had come to an understanding with one another, one that allowed them to remain on good terms.
They were friends.
He was fine with that. At least, he told himself he was fine with it. It was better to be Leah's friend than to have her hate him again.
They were friends - for now. He wasn't sure how long it would last. He wasn't sure if it could last.
She would go back to hating him all over again once she found out what he was hiding from her. He wouldn't blame her for it, either.
"You can't tell her, Paul."
Paul shook his head. "You can't expect to hide it forever, Sam. She's going to be a part of the pack mind. She'll find out eventually."
The two men were standing in a clearing, having met with the Cullens a few moments ago. Sam, Paul, and Jacob were present, along with Carlisle and Edward. They had peaceably (at least, mostly peaceably) worked together, coming to an agreement on how to deal with the threat that was looming over them all.
Once everyone else had gone, Sam brought up the next order of business that needed to be discussed.
"I ordered the other wolves to keep quiet. Leah won't find out." The lines of Sam's face were hard as he stared at his second in command. "If I need to order you too, I will."
Paul bristled at the commandeering tone in his Alpha's voice, not appreciating the threat.
"She's stronger than you think, Sam. She can handle this," he argued, heat tingling up his spine.
Brown eyes flashed. "If she knows, she might try to run again. We can't risk that." Paul opened his mouth to argue once more, but the stocky man continued. "I need her to follow orders. If she finds out what it is they really want, she might get a hothead. You remember what happened during the newborn battle."
That had been a mistake, a terrible one, but still just a mistake. Jacob had long ago forgiven Leah - so had Paul and the rest of the pack.
"That was different." He clenched his fists. "This is different."
Sam growled. "Don't fight me on this, Paul. I will Alpha order you." Paul wanted to disagree, but even if he did, the choice would be made for him regardless. "They think she can have children, that's why they want her. They want to produce their own shifters - force her to be a breeding machine. If she finds out that's what they want, it'll crush her."
Everyone knew how bitterly Leah had lamented her inability to have children, it was one of her most prominent griefs, along with her father's passing and Sam's imprinting. This was only more salt being rubbed in the wound.
What was the right thing to do? Paul could see the reason behind Sam's decision. It wasn't completely out of left field, but it still didn't seem like the right call to make.
Still, in the end it was Sam's call to make. He was their leader. Paul didn't want to follow his orders, but he would have to.
"Fine."
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What did you think about this chapter? I know, I know, I know - none of us want Paul and Leah to be just friends. Strong relationships aren't built easily, so foundations must be laid before anything else can happen.
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