Hey. I realized I made a mistake, and missed like, half the chapter, so the rest is the same, just the beginning part. It's mildly important, because it clears up a major plot hole.
So I'm going to flash back to what Carlisle said to Charlie, instead of showing Alice or someone explain it all to Bella, for two reasons. 1. It's more content. And 2. It's hard to have someone explain and still make sense.
Im so sorry about the mishap, please dont be upset. The reviews are womderful, by the way. I love yall, yall are so nice. Anyways, I gtg, bye!
FLASHBACK TO THREE WEEKS AGO.
"Hello, is this Charlie Swan?" I gave a small, inaudible chuckle at the gasp of shock from the other end.
"Dr. Carlisle?" His voice sounded shocked, but suspicion soon clouded it. "What are you doing?" I was about to answer when he came up with another question. "Is *he* back?" I knew who 'he' was. Edward.
"To answer your first question, yes. It is me. I'm back in forks, and I'm calling because of Bella. To answer your last question, yes, Edward returned with us."
The silence stretched and I could almost feel the fury radiating off the phone because Edward was back. "What's up with Bella?" He finally asked.
I remembered what I was going to say perfectly. "Alice was back at school today, when Bella saw this, she insisted she come over to our house to see Edward again. Alice, Rosalie, Jasper and Emmet drove Bella up to my house where Bella was pleased to see Edward again…" I timed the hesitation perfectly for humans. "But she passed out a few minutes ago" I took a deep, slow breath. "I think it would be best for me to treat her here. She has a simple virus that can quickly develop into something more serious- It's my doctor's opinion that I should watch her for a few days- if it gets worse weeks- just to make sure all is good."
Silence. Then finally to my relief- "okay… can I talk to her?"
The mistrust in his voice was expected, but still hurt. I force a lightheartedness to my grave words, glancing at Bella's thin form, laying on the sofa. After she collapsed earlier, I decided to give her a reason to stay. "She's still out cold. I believe I mentioned the part where she passed out on my doorstep…"
"Alright. Thank you."
(So that was what happened. I felt like it was soemething readers should know. This is the end of the added potion. The rest is the same.)
BELLA POV
But I didn't ask about it. I simply nodded my head vacantly and stared off into space. I felt sick. Dirty. Because of what those...
I cut off my train of thought. This? All of it? Thinking of these things? They would get me nowhere. But Jasper noticed my emotions. Of course he noticed. He never didn't notice. He noticed, shot me a concerned, suspicious look, but didnt say or do anything. Thankgoodness.
EDWARD POV (a few days later)
Bella and Rose were watching a movie together. Something about space. This was... strange. Bella was always someone who was into romance, like Romeo and Julliet. It was different. But different was okay... to a certian degree. No, my problem with different lay somewhere else. My problem with differejt was that everything was different. If it was just her taste in movies, I'd be okay. If it was just her favorite color, no big deal. If it was just her taste in music, I wouldnt give too much thought. No, I didnt like different, because Different had changed who she was. how she held herself, her body lamguage, her scent, her eyes, everything.
I sighed, Heading downstairs. It was like everything about Bella that made Nella Bella, had been buried under... this new person. At first, I'd brushed it aside. I left her. I told muself. of course she's going to be a bit different. She'll come back. the one I know. She's still in there.
She never came back.
BELLA POV
The other day I looked in the mirror. It seemed normal. How many times does the average person glance at themself every day? A lot. That's for sure. But for me, it was different. I looked. I really looked. I looked into my eyes- stared into my soul. Maybe I was just seeing things or- or maybe... I don't know, but what I do know was what I saw in my soul. Vacant, dehected eyes, begging for release from this pain. I was... disgusted. So I turned away.
As I left, someone whispered, "Sucks to be you." But no one was there. Then it clicked. I whispered that. I didnt even think it, I just said it.
I'm never looking in another mirror again.
Now, I can't stop thinking. what is wrong with me over and over again.
I'm a broken tape recorder, suck on the same few phrases.
"He's gone."
"What is wrong with me"
"I'm broken."
Somehow, the words "He's gone" are still stuck in my head. Even when he's back.
JASPER POV
It was getting to me. I didnt want Bella to know, I veiwed her as a little sister- I always had... But her constant emotions of either Numb, or purely depressive things was getting to me. It made it hard to get close to her, hard to block them out, when I should really be trying to help. I couldnt believe she could feel so many negitive things at once. and by the looks of things, it had been this, but worse, or numb-er, the entire time we were away.
So yes, Bella had made some pretty bad desicions in her effort to cope, but I was confident that most would also have made similar ones when under such a onslaught of emotions.
CARLISLE POV
I analized Bella's eyes, "Well, youre back to a normal weight, which is good." I said finally. "I think it was just getting used to eating normal amounts." Bella nodded distantly.
Distant. My daughter had been so distant lately. It hurt to see. Her eyes were empty, or filled with pain. I resolved myself for the conversation I was about to start. "Bella..."
She cut me off. "Can I go now?"
I caved. "Okay, but first let me check your arms."
She nodded, and I gently rolled up her seleves to reveal healing scars. Nothing new. I smile warmly at her, "Im very proud of you. Few do so good."
She smiles back, but it falls flat.
ROSALIE POV
"I want a evening with Bella. Alone." Edward glanced at me, suprised by my request. He must've been distracted because he normally answers the question before it's asked.
"Alright. When?"
"As soon as possible." I say after a moment.
Edward nods absent mindedly. "And you still insist I keep my distance?"
A growl bubbles up from my throat. "Alice foresaw it would make things worse, Edward."
"And yet, she continues to remove herself from my prescence to look at Bella's future, and refuses to show me why."
I want to punch him so bad right now, but instead I remind myself he doesnt realize the severity of the situation, and if he did, he wouldnt be being so insensitive. "She will tell you when she is ready. Alice foresaw that as well."
Edward growls a bit. "I just want to understand! And what do you mean, 'the severity of the situation?!" His voice droped, and cracked a bit too. "Is it... is it bad?"
I dont want to hurt him or worry him needlessly, but he has to know. "Yes, Edward, It is bad."
EDWARD POV
The sudden request, the next day, to go to La Push takes us all by supirse. Nevertheless, here I am, driving her to those... mutts. they are her friends. I rational. they won't hurt her. and I hope I'm right. I use other methods to calm myself as well. Ones that are for-sure. If they do hurt her, I can hurt them worse. And that does the trick. Imagining heads being ripped off helps.
I get out of the car and help Bella out. Jacob is waiting for us. I quickly scan his thoughts to find a sinister intent to them. I growl quietly and hold Bella back. "I can read your thoughts, Jacob."
He smiles. "You're the leech that left her -" he motioned in Bella's general direction, "right?" My jaw stiffens, and I nod slightly. He scoffs, "Alright." Bella walks towards him, and I release my hold.
"If you dare return her in any way but the way she came, I'll thank you for the chance to rip your head off."
He scoffs. "Well, that's not something I can promise."
I tense. "What do you mean..." I snarl.
He shruggs. "She'll certianly be happier than she is with you. with you, she's constantly reminded of the pain you put her through." I glace at Bella, and register she looks slightly guilty. So it is true.
It feels like someone just ripped a jagged dagger out of my chest, leaving a hole, but I get into the car and drive away.
Jacob's words dont stop ringging in my head.
'With you, she's constantly reminded of the pain you put her through.'
