Chapter 14: "My memories of you"
"Listen.
I will lose myself
if it means I can find you."
―Alaska Gold, Growing Light
Screams as loud as thunder filled the silent room and echoed through the entire department, gasps and pants followed. Both women search each other's eyes, finding the same terror reflected on them, neither of them knew to whom the nightmare belonged. Kara was the one breaking the silence that had settled once both were able to regain control of their breathing, a bead of sweat still clinging to her damped forehead.
"Lena, it was just a nightmare, I'm here, it's okay" the blonde tucked a strand of hair that was sticked to Lena's forehead behind her ear. Her mesmerizing eyes were still clouded with fear.
"I, I thought I lost you, again. I… Kara, I can still hear him laughing, I could feel the wetness of your blood on my hands" One single tear rolled down her cheek, Kara quickly run her thumb over smooth skin to dry it and Lena leaned into the touch.
"I know, it was pretty real, I even felt the pain of the bullets all over again" Kara gulped, almost feeling a phantom pain on her abdomen. "But I'm here".
A few minutes later Lena's eyes had lost the fear they were holding, rewarding Kara with their warmth once again.
"What time is it?" the raven hair woman asked while rubbing her eyes and Kara was enamored by the motion. The blonde extended her arm and took her phone from the nightstand.
"Almost 6 am, you want to get back to sleep or should we get up and have some breakfast?" Lena seemed to be considering both options carefully before answering.
"Mmm… what if we stay in bed for a little longer, if we can't fall asleep then I'll make us some breakfast" she then leaned her head on Kara's shoulder making herself comfortable.
"That sounds good" Kara's arm wrapped around Lena keeping her close.
When Kara woke up next it was almost 10 am, both had fallen fast asleep which wasn't a surprise after the events of the previous weeks. Even if hours had passed by, they were still in the same position as before. Kara carefully tried to extract herself from the bed, but as soon as she moved an inch, a groan was heard.
"Kara?" came the raspy voice of Lena, tinted with a bit of worriedness.
Kara watched how her mate tried to open her eyes, what was supposed to be an easy task becoming a full challenge. One eye cracked open, and the blonde was mesmerized by the beauty of the simple action, then a small and sweet smile appeared on alabaster skin.
"Hey you" was the only thing her mind could master, her thoughts already full with Lena, Lena, Lena.
"Good morning darling" came the raspy sleepy voice again "for how long have you been watching me sleep?" the words were said not with annoyance but amusement.
"Not long, I just woke up" Kara replied, her voice low and soothing.
"I must look like shit" Lena run her fingers through messy curls.
Kara rose Lena's chin with her thumb and made eye contact, azure and almost emerald eyes came together in a slow dance of emotions "If anything, you look ethereal my love" the words left her lips with utter delicacy, carrying the pure sentiment of reverence.
"Is this real?" Kara could feel the fear and doubt behind the question, and the blonde's heart broke after sensing what her mate was feeling, how small she sounded.
"It is, I'm right here Lena, I'm not going anywhere" the hand that was before holding Lena's chin was now caressing the side of her face.
"You don't know how many nights I dreamt about this. When you were at de DEO, even after the Dr told us it was almost impossible for you to wake up, I… I dreamt about this moment, and each time I would wake up on an empty and cold bed, and…" her voice broke with emotion "and every time my whole world came crashing down, again and again and again"
The pain reflected on those beautiful eyes was so deep that all Kara wanted to do was erase any negative emotion, made them bright and full of joy once again. "I'm so sorry Lena, you know I can feel your pain, I know what you are feeling right now is scary but I promise you, I'm here now, I'll never leave you alone again" she hugged the other woman then, the embrace bringing comfort to both of them.
"You promise?" the raven hair woman sounded so small, so fragile.
"I promise" Kara grabbed Lena's face with both hands to get a better look at her. "How about we have some breakfast and then if you are free, we can watch something or read, or just talk, whatever you want".
Lena gave her a little peck, her eyes clearer than before "Talking sounds nice, I haven't heard that beautiful voice of yours for too long".
They talked through out breakfast, Lena kept her promise and made some pancakes for Kara while she drank her black coffee. The raven hair woman told her all about her advances on L-CORP, how Jess was doing after Lex attack, the books she had read while taking care of her on the DEO, and Kara mostly listened, she had been asleep so she had nothing to tell, but she was avid to learn what Lena had been doing in the meantime.
Hours went by, both enjoying the easy way the conversation flowed between them. When the time read 5 pm, both were shocked. Kara decided to take a shower while Lena made herself comfortable on the blonde's kitchen and started making dinner with the ingredients the agents had brought them earlier.
"Kara! I'll make some pasta, is that okay?" Lena almost yelled so Kara could hear her from the bathroom.
"Sounds lovely" Lena jumped and the onion she was holding went flying. "Ups, sorry, I didn't mean to scare you" the blonde said sheepishly.
"Kara oh my God, I thought you were still on the bathroom" the brunette grabbed the onion from the floor and then turn towards Kara "you scared…" but she never finished her sentence, her mouth was hanging open, the blonde could see the muscles of her neck working while she swallowed, her irises almost consumed by the black of her dilated pupils.
Apparently going out of the bathroom wearing only a towel was the right choice, with the look her mate was giving her, the wolf inside her became almost restless, a small bragging smile settled on her face "You were saying?"
Lena finally managed to close her mouth and cleared her throat. "You know what? It doesn't matter anymore" she signaled the chopping board waiting on the kitchen table "I'll start cooking, you should get dressed".
"Okay, but I'll need your help" the blonde stated in a teasing manner.
The brunette gulped "What for?" her voice came out almost breathless and oh how Kara loved seeing her mate losing that self-control she had of her persona.
"I need your help to clean up my wound" Lena sighed. "I can do it myself if you don't feel comfortable doing it". Even after almost a month, her abdomen was still healing. Dr Simmons had told her it had to do with the compound inside the bullets, apparently it wasn't only liquid silver on them but it also had some sort of anticoagulant that made everything worse.
"Oh, yes of course, I'll do it, just let me clean my hands" the blonde could still see how dark her mate's eyes were and she felt ecstatic.
"I'll wait for you in the bedroom". Once there, Kara dressed herself, she decided on sweatpants and a sport bra, leaving her abdomen uncovered so Lena could work on her wounds.
Once in the room, Lena grabbed the first aid kit. Before she started her ministrations her long fingers run softly against red, angry scars, the sensation made Kara gulped, her traitorous brain wandering how would it feel if those long fingers were touching a much more sensible part.
"Does it hurt?" the soft question broke her out of her thoughts, her inner wolf almost whimpering.
"A little, just when I move in certain ways" what affected Kara the most was that she could also sense Lena's emotions, how when her hand touched her abdomen the brunette felt heat running through her entire self, Kara could hear her breathing coming more labored and her heartbeat going crazy. Their gaze met and the atmosphere on the room became almost electric, their bond amplified their sensations until they were overflowed by them. In a sudden, desperate move, their lips were crashing together on a battle for dominance. The kiss was rushed, messy, full of passion and Kara's wolf was frantic. They kept dancing like this, Kara ravishing Lena's mouth as if her life depended on it. When the brunette bit Kara's lower lip with enough force to draw blood, the loud growl that thundered in the back of her throat surprise both women. When their hands started wandering through each others body, there was a knock on Kara's door.
"Ignore them" Kara said, her voice low, dangerous and full of lust, she connected their mouth once again while one of her hands position itself on the back of Lena's neck and the other was placed dangerously close to Lena's chest. But the knock came again, more insistent this time.
"Kara? Are you there? It's me Nia, open up!" the mention of her friend's name felt like if a bucket of cold water was thrown at her. Both became aware of what they were about to do and what Nia had interrupted, Kara took a step back and looked at Lena. "Sorry, I got to go, I know Nia and she won't stop knocking until I don't open the door".
"It's okay Kara, go" the almost breathless voice coming from her mate made her insides burn like a volcano. "You should probably put a shirt on first".
Another knock. "I'm coming, I'm coming" the blonde said with frustration while she put one of her shirts on.
When she opened the door, Nia's fist was up, apparently ready to knock once more, and Kara gave her an amused look. "You know that one knocking is enough, don't you?" her words held no malice. A second later she was being pushed inside, Nia's body crashing against her own.
"Oh God Kara! You're alright!" Nia's tight grasp made her whine, her wound not feeling happy at being pressed. The younger woman realized this and loosened her grip. "Are you okay?"
"Yeah, yeah, it's just a scratch from a little accident I had" Nia didn't look convinced. "Ouch!" a strong punch landed on her right arm "what was that for?"
"Are you kidding?, Kara you went radio silent for almost a month, a month! I called you, I came here almost every day! Where the hell have you been?" the girl sounded really worried and Kara felt awful for not calling her earlier.
"I'm sorry Nia, I really are, but something came up and I wasn't able to call you" Kara still sounded a little breathless. Nia watched her, her eyes searching for something.
"You sound agitated and your face is red, were you working out?"
"Kara? Who was it?" the brunette came out of the bathroom, her head low while she typed something on her phone, when she raised her head, she saw a young beautiful woman almost hugging Kara. "Oh, hello". Lena's voice sounded cold and Kara could feel her mate subtle jealousy behind it.
"Oh shoot! You are Lena freaking Luthor!" the girl gave Kara a curious and excited look and the blonde's ears were attacked by the loud pitch of her voice "I'm interrupting something?" Nia told in a more calm but equally excited tone.
"Lena? Come here" the blonde called while extending her hand for the other woman to take, which she did.
"Lena, this is Nia Nal, my best friend, Nia this is Lena Luthor, my girlfriend" she waited for Lena's reaction, they hadn't put a name to their relationship yet, but she hoped and was almost certain that this was something her mate wanted too, she got her answer when Lena gave her a sweet and happy smile.
"Nice to meet you Nia" the raven hair woman extended her arm to shake hands which the girl did with an open mouth. "I believe I heard your name before".
Kara chuckled and Nia watch her with curiosity. "I might have use your name to get an interview with Lena".
"Right! I remember now" the brunette said.
"So that's what happened! I was so lost when everybody at Catco kept asking me how my interview with Lena Luthor went" Nia talked while her hands moved without stop. "Sooo, that's what you were doing this past month? You two were together?". Both women looked at each other, the alibi brought by Nia even better than what Kara had in mind.
"Okay you got me, but listen Nia, you can't tell anyone about us".
"Yeah yeah, my lips are sealed" the reporter made the motion of closing her lips and throwing away the key. "In return I have a favor to ask you" the girl added batting her eyelids.
"What do you need?" the blonde asked with sincere interest.
"The last time I came here searching for you I met this guy, he said he was visiting her aunt. We kind of clicked you now? he asked me where he could find me, I told her my name and that if he wanted to find me, he would find a way but he never did" the blonde almost facepalm herself. "I know, I know don't judge me, I panicked, ok? He was cute and nice and I tried to sound interesting, but that's not the point, I need you to tell me how I can find him".
"Okay, but how does he look like? Did he give you his name?"
"He said everyone call him Brainy? He was a little shorter than me, black hair shoulder's length, dark brown…" Nia wasn't able to finish. There was just one man matching all the descriptions and Brainy wasn't a common nickname.
"I know him" Lena was watching the exchanged with amusement. "I'll give you his number, but don't tell him I did, and Nia, be patient with him, he is a little slow when it comes to feelings but he's a great guy".
A few minutes later Nia was rushing through the door, saying sorry for not being able to stay longer.
"She seems nice, and energetic". Lena came closer, encasing Kara with her arms.
"You have no idea. Sorry I lied, but she doesn't know about me and what happened with Lex. I don't want to tell her an put her in danger". Her arms were know resting on Lena's waist while the shorter women had her own resting on Kara's neck.
"It's okay, I understand" they kept glaring at each other, when the atmosphere became charged again the brunette broke the contact and headed towards the room "Let's go, we never got to clean your wounds".
Lena's touch was soft and careful, her ministrations were done with the utmost care, every few seconds she would ask Kara if she was okay, the blonde nodding every time. Once Kara's abdomen was covered with gauze, Lena's hand was kept there, for a few moments they were in complete silence.
"Kara, I…" the CEO took a deep breath and Kara swallowed hard "I know what you're thinking, damn, I even know what you're feeling, but we already said we would wait until you're fully recovered, I can feel you're still in pain". The blonde sighed in defeat.
"I hate that you're so rational" the blonde answered with fondness.
"Well darling, one of us has to be, for our own sakes".
They ate dinner together while they interchange some stories about their time in high school. Alex had called Kara eventually to know how she was doing. It was almost 10:30 when decided to call it a night.
They were fast asleep when Lena's phone rang early in the morning, Jess had called her to make sure her boss didn't miss her 8 am meeting. Lena had arranged everything to work from Kara's department but there was just one meeting she had to attend. The blonde groaned at the notion of her girlfriend getting out of bed, she grabbed Lena's hand trying to stop the motion.
"Kara, you know I have to go, just for today" Lena said in a sweet soothing voice.
"Are you sure you can't reschedule this meeting?" the blonde answered pouting.
"Not this one, but I promise I'll be back as soon as it ends".
"Okay, I'll be waiting for you" Kara knew she sounded clingy but even if she had been sleeping throughout the entire month, she felt like she had miss Lena tremendously.
Once Lena left the department the blonde was not able to get back to sleep, instead, she got up and made herself breakfast. While she was going through some pictures she had taken before the incident happened, her phone rang. The caller ID was blocked but she answered the call nonetheless.
"Hello?"
"Hello Kara" the deep voice coming through the line gave her goosebumps, his voice was unmistakable. "What do you want?"
"That's no way to speak to your Alpha, is it?"
"Please, I'm not in the mood, what do you need?" the blonde asked with tiredness.
"Okay, straight to the point I see. Well, a little bird told me you were attack, and apparently a man by the name of Lex Luthor was responsible". Kara's blood went cold, how had he found out? "I'll take your silence as confirmation. We know for a fact that he's one of heads of this… so called Order" he said the name with disdain. "I just wanted to let you know that I will make him pay, no one, except myself, is allowed to hurt my new pet" he finished with anger.
"Your pet?" the blonde asked incredulously.
"Oh, my dear Kara, every single one of you are my pets, but you, you are my special one, you belong to me now, your life it's on my hands, remember that. Now, about that man, you don't have to worry, I'll take care of him. Goodbye Kara". When the call ended Kara was left trembling, a cold sweat run through the long of her back. The way he said her name kept resonating inside her head, the familiar accent bringing a memory well-guarded at the back of her mind.
"You're special Kara…" a sharp pain on her head made her dizzy "Remember that name…", it was as if she was being stab on the head, again and again, she fell to her knees unable to keep herself on her feet any longer, both of her hands were on her head, squeezing hard as if the motion would ease the pain "Lena, remember that name". She tried to take a deep breath but no air seemed to get inside her lungs. "Lena, Lena, Lena, I have to remember, Lena, Lena…" she heard the sound of the door opening up, quick steps coming her way and then she saw someone kneeling in front of her, a woman with the most beautiful green eyes she had ever seen. She tried to say something but all her mind could think was the word Lena, so that's what she repeated once again "Lena", that apparently made the trick as her brain let the next set of words out "Who are you?". The woman looked at her and she could see fear reflected on those beautiful emerald eyes.
Thank you for reading! I hope you have enjoyed this story so far! Reviews are always welcomed!
