"Stupefy!" Harry's spell knocked out the other Snatcher as he turned, jumping off the crate to approach Charlotte.
Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. Hermione was always the medic. She was the best with healing spells and potions. What would he do now that she was injured? Why hadn't he paid more attention to Madam Pomfrey when he was always in the damn hospital wing?
The screaming made it hard for him to think. He felt like he was unraveling. How the hell was he going to save her? What should he do? The harsh sound of the gate clanging echoed through the arena, managing to cut through the screaming. His wand whipped up as two elderly wizards in green robes ran inside and they came to an abrupt halt at his wand, their hands up, talking fast.
He couldn't hear them over the damn screaming. Who was screaming?
Robards ran in, yelling at Harry to get ahold of himself and to lower his wand. He told Harry that the wizards in green were medics and that it was Charlotte who was injured. It was Charlotte, not Hermione.
Of course, Harry knew it was Charlotte. He wasn't crazy.
Harry saw Robards eyes move over his shoulder and nod to someone behind him and started to turn. His own screaming overshadowed the rushing sound of the spell coming at him.
Harry felt the stunning spell hit him in the back, and the world went dark, the screaming finally stopping as he hit the floor with Hermione's name on his lips.
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Harry woke up abruptly, disorientated as the zing of a rennervate spell rush through him putting a faintly metallic taste in his mouth and his eyes snapped open. Thoughts whipped by at lightning speed through his mind.
Alastor Moody's gruff voice echoed loudly in his mind, almost a scream in his ear. Constant vigilance!
The blurry shapes of death eaters surrounded him. One was close enough so that even without his glasses, he could see the wand at their side.
Harry snatched the wand and started casting before they could speak. "Stupefy! Stupefy! Stupefy!"
He felt the cool rush of the stunning spell pulling him under as loud thumps of bodies hitting the floor resounded through the room.
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Harry woke for the second time much more slowly, his body feeling like it had been beaten. He threw his hand out blindly until he felt his glasses on the table next to him, putting them on. There was a sour taste in his mouth and when he blinked his eyes open, he was in a dimly lit room with an elderly wizard in green robes who vaguely reminded him of Dumbledore. A healer from St Mungos.
"How are you feeling, Mr. Potter?" The healer asked softly.
What? It felt like his brain responded sluggishly as he tried to formulate an answer. But one image came abruptly to mind. "Hermione! How is she?"
"You mean Charlotte Halstead?"
Harry slashed an impatient hand through the air. "Yes, Charlotte, just tell me. How is she?"
"She's fine, regrowing a portion of her thoracic vertebrae in addition to several rib bones that were too badly broken for normal repair. Because of the intricacy with spinal regrowth, she'll likely be here several weeks."
Harry huffed out a breath, laying back to stare up at the ceiling, trying to piece together what had happened.
"Why am I here?"
There was a brief pause, then the healer spoke very carefully. "There were some concerns about your behavior after your partner's injury. You seemed confused about who your partner was, and when you refused to lower your wand, you were knocked out so that the healers could attend to Mrs. Halstead. You were brought along with her to St. Mungos and were awakened by Mr. Robards and the ICW delegation… and well… "
Harry threw an arm over his eyes, remembering the abrupt feeling of waking up to the rennervate. The blurry crowd around him that he thought were death eaters. He couldn't decide what emotion was sharper, as they all mixed inside him. The burning concern to see for himself that Charlotte was okay. The shame as he remembered how he had pulled his wand on the healers. The absolute cutting embarrassment as he realized he knocked out several of the ICW delegates when he woke up.
He had been okay. What the bloody hell had happened?
Even now, he could feel the edge of paranoia in his mind. A tiny part of him still insisted Hermione had been injured. He didn't just want to see Charlotte; he wanted to see Hermione. Harry wanted to make sure they were both okay.
He pushed up his glasses on his face and dug his palms into his eyes, trying to will away the intrusive thoughts. The healer gently tugged on Harry's hand, pulling it away from covering his face and clasping it reassuringly between his own.
"Why don't we walk together to go see Mrs. Halstead? Hmm? She's just down the corridor. She's been very worried about you."
"Worried about me?" The words practically strangled him as he asked. The healer nodded and gave a small tug on his hand.
"I think it might help you to see her."
As Harry got up from the bed, a thousand scenarios ran through his mind. Charlotte blaming him for her injury. Caroline crying over her mother. Charlotte thinking he lost the plot and not wanting to work with him ever again. He had gone completely mental. Bloody hell.
As they opened the door to Charlotte's room, Harry braced himself, taking a deep breath as they walked in.
Charlotte was on the bed, bandages wrapped around her, her rib cage looking a bit flat from her missing ribs, but she was alert and smiled at him as he entered. Tony was at her side with Caroline in his arms. When Caroline spotted him, she wiggled in her father's arms and he placed her down on the floor and she ran straight up to hold out her arms to get picked up.
"Mummy missed you." Harry picked her up, and she gave him a hug. Her small arms wrapped around his neck.
"Oh?" He said hoarsely. He didn't look at Tony or Charlotte again, still afraid of what he would see in their eyes.
Caroline nodded against his neck. "Mummy said you were very very very very sad when she hurted because you don't heal."
"Yes. I was very sad."
"Mummy said you made everyone go to sleep instead."
Impossibly, the urge to laugh bubbled up right along with the overwhelming urge to cry. He hugged Caroline tight, rocking her gently back and forth as he did both, and she patted him with her little hands.
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Harry,
So… I thought you were in town and wanted to see each other and maybe take pictures? I don't think that's weird at all. That would be kind of nice. I went by Grimmauld and you weren't there… I went by the Ministry, but of course no one in the Auror office would release any information to me. As if they don't know who I am! Where are you?
Your Best Friend,
Hermione
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Ron,
Have you heard from Harry? He hasn't written to me. Is everything going okay?
Hermione
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Harry,
Why are you doing this? You write me letters; you act like everything is okay between us, but you never want to voluntarily see me. What is going on? Is it something I did? Why aren't you writing back to me?
Ron's not writing to me either. Are both of you just forgetting me because you're both Aurors and I'm going back to Hogwarts?
McGonagall wrote to me and let me know I'm Head Girl. Not that you care apparently. Will I even see you at Kings Cross? Somehow I doubt it. You've missed every single meeting we were supposed to have– what's one more?
Hermione
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Andromeda sat on a rocking chair in the cheerful soft yellow of Teddy's baby room. Teddy slept on her shoulder, his little hand occasionally moving slightly to touch her hair in his sleep.
Her hand rubbed little circles on Teddy's back as he slept, and it occurred to her it had been quite a few days since she had heard from Harry. She had been pleased but very shocked that Harry had taken such an intense interest in being part of his godson's life. Since reaching out to her that first time to inquire about developing a closer relationship with Teddy, Harry had been like clockwork. Short letters arriving every few days to inquire about Teddy's doings and well-being.
Which is why, as she realized how long it had been since she last heard from Harry, she became increasingly concerned. Even with the intensity and constraints of his Auror training schedule, which Andromeda thought was way too restrictive, Harry had managed to continue writing frequently.
Harry went to such lengths to make sure he had a close relationship with Teddy. He renovated his house to make it more suitable for Teddy, taking care to establish a visiting schedule. Then even when his Auror training started he had maintained that level of commitment- only to fall to silence now. It didn't make sense.
The more Andromeda thought about the unusualness of his behavior, the more concerned she became. Who could she reach out to? There was always Molly and Arthur Weasley, Molly had always been one to have her finger in every pie. Molly would probably almost definitely know if something was amiss.
But Andromeda hesitated. Molly had lost her child and from Molly's behavior the last time they had spoken Andromeda knew she was just a bit paranoid about the rest of her children - which she included Harry in that number. Andromeda still struggled daily with her grief and depression from losing her husband and then Nymphadora. Sometimes she saw muggles in the streets who had dyed their hair pink and she would freeze, thinking just for a second that it was her daughter. It wasn't. And it never would be.
No, best not to bother Molly or Arthur if she could avoid it. She wouldn't add to the Weasley family having another worry. Maybe a short visit to Grimmauld was in order. Even with Harry being away for Auror training house-elves always had an internal sense of knowing about their masters. If she took Teddy, she was sure that Kreacher would likely tell her anything she wanted to keep her there longer.
The normally sour house-elf was strangely quite enamored and protective of Teddy. Her plan of action was decided. Andromeda stood up carefully, although Teddy was a good sleeper. Her teal haired grandson barely shifted, his body lax and warm in his cozy little teddy bear patterned jumper.
He even slept through apparitions! Something that, prior to Teddy, Andromeda would have said was completely impossible. The queer squeezing sensation was a bit unpleasant in her opinion, but apparently in Teddy's opinion, it wasn't even worth waking up over.
Taking care of her grandson on her own had made Andromeda very organized. In the entryway, she quickly grabbed her purse and a small baby bag she kept ready for short outings. Moving swiftly out the door and past the wards, she apparated to the front of Grimmauld and true to form Teddy remained asleep through the short travel.
Andromeda walked up the steps to Grimmauld and the door opened just as she stepped up to the last step and Kreacher stood back to let her pass.
"Hello, Kreacher. I know this is a bit unusual… but I was wondering if you knew… well… Just if Harry is okay? I haven't received a letter from him in a few days."
Kreacher shifted back and forth, his eyes wandering on the living room. "Master is as Master is."
"He's here?"
Kreacher stepped back almost as if he was going to block the stairs. "Master is not receiving visitors."
"What in the world? Kreacher, what exactly is going on here?"
Kreacher rubbed his head, shifting from side to side uneasily as he answered the question. "Master not say to not say. Master very upset when he come back. Master is no longer an Auror."
Andromeda sucked in a sharp breath. Harry had talked to her at length as they replaced his wardrobe and sorted out Grimmauld about how he wanted to help people and felt that being an Auror was the best path for him to accomplish that goal.
She had never noticed anything in his notes to her that might indicate he was unhappy with being an Auror. So what had happened?
"Kreacher, would you mind watching Teddy for me?"
Kreacher immediately came forward with his thin arms held out for little Teddy, and Andromeda carefully handed the baby over. As soon as Teddy was in Kreacher's arms, he let out a little gurgle and his ears briefly stretched out before going back to their normal shape.
Andromeda gave Teddy a little pat on the back, nodding at Kreacher before climbing the steps to the second story. It was obvious which room was Harry's, even without her having been in it before, because it was the only door that was closed in the upstairs corridor.
She approached and knocked softly. "Harry? It's Andy. I was wondering if I could speak with you if you don't mind…"
The door almost immediately opened to reveal an extremely disheveled Harry whose hair rivaled a bird's nest. He had dark circles under his eyes and his skin was pale from lack of sun, as if he had been hiding in a cave these past few days.
"Is Teddy okay?" he inquired immediately.
"Oh yes, of course."
She heard the small exhale of relief before his hand came up to rub the back of his neck. "How can I help you then, Andy?"
"I was actually worried about you . I hadn't heard from you in a few days and Kreacher just told me that you're no longer an Auror? What happened?"
Harry dropped his hand, avoiding her eyes. "I realized it wasn't the right fit for me."
"You seemed so sure last month… what happened to make you change your mind?"
"I'd rather not get into it if you don't mind." His voice was flatly polite, his refusal firm in his voice and expression.
Andromeda's brow creased as she stared at the obviously troubled teen. He was so young to have been through so much loss and strife. Harry deserved some happiness now, and she had honestly thought he was on the right path because of his confidence and letters, but now, looking at him, he looked like he was fresh from the war again.
She reached out tentatively, not sure where the boundary lay between them, and smooth the worst of his dark hair down a bit. "You know there's so many different things you can be, Harry…"
He gave her a small smile. "My best friend just told me that recently too, you know."
"It's true. I know you declined to go back to Hogwarts, but I'm sure you can get back on the enrollment list."
"I don't know about that. The term starts so soon. I haven't even purchased any supplies.." He shrugged.
Andromeda's eyes widened at the equivocating answer. Every other time she had spoken to him about maybe returning to school to give himself more time for recovery and just to explore his own interests he had firmly told her he was happy with his path as an Auror. But now he sounded … uncertain... even mildy tempted?
"I can help you with that. I can help you get your supplies and talk to the Headmistress. I'm sure she would be very happy-"
"Andy, I really appreciate it, but I couldn't take up your time like that. I'll just figure something out. I-I'm not sure really what I'm going to do."
What Andy heard is that he needed to be convinced. She gave him a noncommittal smile. "We're family now, remember? You're my cousin's godson, and you're the godfather of my grandson. It's not taking up my time to help you. It's what family does."
She patted his shoulder. "You think, and I'll just do a bit of helping, okay?"
Andromeda didn't wait for an answer, but strode off, ignoring his attempts to get her attention from his room. Motivation flooded her as she thought of helping Harry, especially now that she could help him find a path other than as an Auror. She had a chance to help him turn to a different direction than the dangerous profession that had stolen her own child's life.
When she reached the main floor Kreacher was slowly rocking Teddy, as the baby cooed at him, yanking on his ears. Adoration looked very strange on his grouchy face as he stared at the baby.
"Kreacher."
"Yes, Mistress?"
"Was the floo ever hooked up into the network?"
"Yes, Mistress."
"I'm going to step out for just a bit, okay? I shouldn't be gone that long. And leave the floo open for me."
Andromeda turned at Kreachers' nod, grabbing some floo powder from the mantle and throwing it into the fireplace.
"Three Broomsticks!" With a flare of the fireplace, she disappeared.
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Harry felt a little discombobulated watching Andromeda march down the stairs. He hadn't expected her to have such a reaction and frankly wasn't sure how to deal with it. Though if Andromeda was here, that likely meant Teddy was too, so he should get dressed so he could see his godson.
He closed the door and quickly cleaned up and changed his clothes, trying to make himself presentable. After quitting the Aurors, he had sunk into a bit of a rut. Becoming an Auror had seemed to be the right path to take, not to mention the path everyone expected him to take.
Although Hermione had never expected it, a tiny part of his mind whispered at him. He pushed that thought away firmly. His mind had been a little bit too obsessive about Hermione since the incident, and he didn't trust himself to be around her right now. He had a stack of letters from her and Ron that he had so far avoided opening. He didn't even know if he could tell them what happened, although Ron probably knew the gist due to being in MLE too.
Robards and even surprisingly, Charlotte had tried to convince him to stay in the Auror program. They had told him that reactions like his were commonplace in their line of work where Aurors sometimes experienced very traumatic events due to their job duties, and that they had mind healers who could help him work through his reactions to stressful events.
Faced with them, his first impulse had been to agree to the therapy and keep moving towards being an Auror. But the desperate faces of the werewolves they had arrested flashed into mind. The helplessness he felt when Charlotte had been injured and realizing there was nothing he could do to save her. If anything, he had been the one to put her further in danger because he had made the Healers pause on their way to her to avoid getting stunned by him.
Every little disquieting moment of wrongness since the start of his Auror training formed this massive list in his mind. And so he had told them no, he was quitting. Charlotte had seemed shocked, but Robards had barely reacted, merely clapping him on the shoulder and telling him the door was open when he was ready to come back. From his tone and demeanor, it was obvious Robards thought Harry would change his mind fairly quickly. Harry didn't bother to correct his misconception. He didn't know what he wanted to do, but even after a month and a half, it was obvious that the MLE was not for him.
Voices floated up from downstairs and he quickly exited his room to go see what was happening in his own house. He went down the stairs, and halted at the landing to the sight of Headmistress McGonagall and Andromeda cooing over Teddy, who was still held by Kreacher. Harry blinked and shook his head slightly. Now there was an image he never thought of seeing.
"Er. Hello." He said awkwardly, not quite sure how to act.
McGonagall straightened up and gave him a stern look and opened her arms. "How have you been, Harry Potter?"
Harry went to give her a hug as a greeting and as her thin arms closed tightly and firmly around him. He suddenly felt like he was eleven years old again, it had been such a comfort to have her as his head of house. Tears pricked his eyes, and he blinked rapidly, faintly annoyed with himself for being so emotional.
"I've been well."
McGonagall looked over at Andromeda not releasing Harry. "What I've heard is that you are rethinking your decision to become an Auror."
"I'm sorry." He blurted out against her shoulder as she continued to hug him tightly. McGonagall had been one of the people who had been determined to help him achieve his dream of being an Auror.
"Potter I will assist you to become an Auror if it is the last thing I do! If I have to coach you nightly I will make sure you achieve the required results!"
McGonagall finally pulled back, her hands going to his shoulders as if bracing him. "There is nothing to be sorry for. With all the injustice you experienced growing up, it makes perfect sense that you would want to be an Auror. And it's also okay to change your mind. We're in a different world now, Harry. And that's thanks to you."
Harry blinked rapidly. It had been comforting to him to have a path, choosing to walk away from that had been hard. Not knowing his next step forward had been even more difficult. McGonagall paused, searching his face and her voice was a little softer as she continued.
"Come back to Hogwarts, Potter. Play quidditch and study. Laugh with your friends, Miss Granger is going to be Head Girl. Why don't you help her and be Head Boy? Give yourself some real time to decide what you're going to do with the rest of your life."
Help Hermione. An imagined memory, Hermione slumped against a broken crate, blood spattered across her face and a huge jagged spike of wood protruding from her body. His breath caught, and he had to suppress a shudder.
Then a real memory of her lying there in the Department of Mysteries, Neville's nasally voice telling him that he could feel a pulse. The only reason between her life and death was the fact that Dolohov's spell had been weaker because he cast it wordlessly.
"Potter." The sharp voice snapped him out of the spiral and he met McGonagall's authoritative gaze. She raised her hand to cup his cheek in a rare affectionate gesture that caught his attention. "Come back to Hogwarts, Harry. Have one normal year. You deserve that."
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Hermione stood on platform 9 3/4s in a group of Gryffindors who were all subdued as they watched the surrounding crowd. There were bright flashes of light as people took pictures, some were parents, and some were photographers.
She was neatly turned out, already in her school robes, a shiny head girl badge pinned high on her shoulder. Hermione kept her head straight. If she looked for her best friends, she might cry, and that was not the first impression she wanted to give for her eighth year.
Molly Weasley wrung her hands in between hugging Ginny over and over. "Are you sure you want to go? I'm sure your father can withdraw you… we can hire tutors! Your father received that promotion… and really, there's no reason you have to go, dear."
Molly studiously avoided looking to the left of them where the crowd of Slytherins and their parents stood isolated. There was a distinct circle around them, as if they were contagious and no one wanted to be too close or risk catching whatever they had.
"Mum, I want to go. I need to… I just need to go." Ginny pulled back firmly from her mother.
"I'll keep an eye on her, Mrs. Weasley, don't worry."
Molly looked at her, and there was something in her eyes that reminded Hermione of how she had behaved towards her in fourth year. Hermione wondered what Ron might have told his mother about her or their relationship. Even though her heart hurt as she boarded without seeing her friends, it was a relief to escape the tense atmosphere of the boarding platform.
Hermione immediately made her way to the prefect's carriage to make sure that there was adequate supervision for the train ride to the school. She stepped into the carriage and came to an abrupt halt, because the sole occupant in the carriage was Draco Malfoy. His pale hair was perfectly done and dressed in obviously expensive quality robes. He stiffened as he turned to regard her, the shiny prefect badge pinned to his robes.
"Granger."
All the blood rushed to her head, and she felt dizzy as she imagined herself for just a second losing her mind. Screaming and casting spells at him until he was laid out at her feet. Her arm burned as his gray eyes met hers and her hand tightened on the wand she didn't even remember drawing.
"Hermione." The voice, although sweetly soft, made her jump and blink rapidly. Malfoy was white and pressed back slightly into the seat, as if trying to get further away from her. Hermione looked over and met Luna's calm blue eyes.
"Come with me for a minute, Hermione." Luna held out her hand and Hermione swallowed hard, trying to push the burning rush of emotions that had almost overwhelmed her at the sight of Malfoy's face. She put her hand in Luna's and let the witch lead her away, not looking back at the prefect carriage, not even thinking about her responsibilities.
"Wh-where are we going?" She managed to ask after a minute, despite feeling like all her emotions were stuck in her throat, choking her. Luna led her into the passageway between the carriages and, without answering verbally or any self consciousness, pulled Hermione into a hug.
"I'm glad you're here. It makes me feel less alone." Luna whispered gently to her and Hermione found she couldn't stop the big fat tears from rolling down her cheeks.
Seeing Malfoy had been a shock to her system. Why would McGonagall make him a prefect? Why not anyone else? She hadn't prepared herself for that. She'd have to likely work fairly close with him as Head Girl, and her stomach churned.
Hermione needed to find out who was Head Boy, if -if it was a Slytherin then she thought she may need to give up the position. She couldn't handle that.
She wanted her best friends with her. She wanted Har-
Hermione abruptly pulled back from Luna wiping impatiently at her cheeks. "You being here makes me feel less alone too, Luna."
Hermione straightened her shoulders and looked into Luna's caring gaze. "If it bothers you that he's a prefect, I'll go complain to McGonagall. He had you in his bloody dungeon! You shouldn't have to-"
Luna shook her head, reaching out to give Hermione's arm a squeeze cutting her off. "I've already forgiven him. Are you going to be okay?"
Forgiveness? To hell with that, Hermione clenched her hands into fists to stop the trembling. Hermione pointlessly lied to Luna's knowing gaze. "I'm fine. It doesn't bother me at all."
Then, with a stiff upper lip, she marched back towards the prefect's carriage.
Studiously avoiding looking directly at Malfoy, she advised the plan for managing the corridors and rotation and also handed out preliminary schedules for the first month back until they could get into the swing of things for patrols and find out who worked well enough with each other.
She managed to avoid crying when she heard the exclamations from second years about the "horseless carriages" while it was easy to pick out the mute faces of those who actually saw the thestrals, not saying anything to their friends. For once she had absolutely no impulse to go educate them on what was really pulling the carriages... and worse why only some people could see them.
It was late after making sure that all the houses were settled, that Hermione finally made her way to the Head Girl rooms, sectioned off away from the other houses. She had meant to talk to McGonagall about who would be the Head Boy, but between helping the prefects and sorting out some tense arguments, she hadn't managed to speak to the Headmistress.
She walked into the small common room between the two rooms and closed the door, leaning back against it with a sigh. Thank god today was over. It had been much more emotionally taxing than she had imagined. Hermione straightened and headed towards her head girl's rooms when a noise made her stop midway between the rooms. There had been a noise behind the head boy door.
She paused for a moment, a little leery of finding out who it might be considering McGonagall had made Malfoy a prefect. But she took a deep breath and marched over to introduce herself and find out.
She knocked firmly on the door and heard some scrambling behind the door before footsteps approached. The door swung open, and she found herself staring into familiar green eyes.
"Hey, Hermione." He gave a tentative smile. "Surprise?"
It was a queer feeling to have so much anger and happiness swirling around inside her. She didn't know if she was going to hug him or punch him. And so, of course, she acted quite deranged, even in her own opinion much later when she thought about it.
Her hand whipped up to poke into his chest aggressively, tears already starting to leak from her eyes, and she said in a threatening voice. "I am so bloody happy to see you that I don't want to see you!"
She ignored his sputtering and batted away his hands that tried to hug her and whirled around to stomp back towards her own room. She slammed her door closed and locked it before he could reach it, and ignored his knocking and rushed explanations.
"Hermione please-"
She whipped her wand towards the door, casting a silencing spell, then threw herself on the bed and pulled a pillow over her head.
Harry was the Head Boy.
⋅•⋅⋅•⋅⊰⋅•⋅⋅•⋅⋅•⋅⋅•⋅∙∘ ༓ ∘∙•⋅⋅⋅•⋅⋅⊰⋅•⋅⋅•⋅⋅•⋅⋅•⋅⋅•⋅⋅•⋅⊰⋅•⋅⋅•⋅⋅•⋅⋅•⋅∙∘ ༓ ∘∙•⋅⋅⋅•⋅⋅⊰⋅•⋅⋅•⋅⋅•⋅⋅•⋅
A/N: Should be daily updates for a couple of more days until this story is caught up then I'll slow down with the posting on this one. Maybe I'll start moving over my other big fic finally. But I'll probably condense that one down like I did some of my other fics so it's fewer chapters to move over. I'm really close to completing the next chapter of Alpha of Alphas and Remedy I just don't know which I'm going to complete first and post! Yay.
