Chapter 6
As Shirou stepped through the dark, fragrant forest, his heart raced as if a thousand butterflies had taken flight in his chest. The trees seemed to whisper secrets as they towered around him, and a hush fell over the woods.
Shirou lived for moments like these. For the chance to do something great, to help others.
To confront a Manticore and a Griffin, monsters known for wanton destruction. Shirou thought there could be nothing more honorable.
Prowling through the woods, Shirou looked back at his friends. Megumin and Aqua shuffled along with heavy bags under their eyes. Shirou didn't know it, but once Darkness picked herself up, she had kept the girls up most of the night, exalting Shirou's virtues.
It did not make for a restful night. However, they marched along regardless, with nary a complaint. It made Shirou smile. To think he had found such like-minded individuals in another world.
"We're getting close to where the Manticore and Griffin have been fighting, right?" Kazuma whispered, head on a swivel.
It would come as no surprise that Kazuma had a vested interest in avoiding these monsters altogether. Now, if only everyone else could get on the same page.
Kazuma jumped as the crack of a breaking branch echoed out.
Darkness hung her head, avoiding eye contact with Kazuma. Her mouth formed a tight line, and her brows knitted together. "Sorry," she whispered, her voice strained with guilt.
Kazuma took a deep breath and tried to calm his racing heart. Before he could berate Darkness, Aqua spoke up... loudly.
"No need to be sorry, Darkness. Kazuma is a big scaredy cat. Consequences of living most of his life indoors, like the shut-in he is."
"Shut up!"
Kazuma seemingly forgot to be quiet as he began to bicker with Aqua, all traces of his previous fear vanishing.
"Do you even understand what we're hunting? Huh, you useless priest."
Aqua waved her hand before her face like she smelled something rank.
"Of course, I remember. This quest pays 800,000 after all."
"It doesn't matter what it pays if we don't survive to spend it."
Aqua looked at Kazuma with wide eyes.
"D-don't joke like that, K-Kazuma."
"He isn't joking," Darkness said. "Both Manticores and Griffins are considered army killers. In truth, I found myself shocked the guild posted such a quest. Usually, the capital dispatches a team of elite beast hunters for such jobs for fear of high casualties."
Aqua's head whipped frantically back and forth, looking from Darkness's excited smile to Kazuma's twitching eye.
"Ahhhh! What do you mean by army killers? Kazuma, this is your fault; you said we should go on this quest!"
"My fault! Shirou's the one who wanted to take this quest, not me. Blame him!"
Kazuma pointed at Shirou.
"In fact, he probably plans to use you as bait; what with your divine presence, I'm sure the monsters will come straight for you!"
Shirou planned no such thing! Everyone knew that healers never needed to be kept safe. However, a high-pitched screech came from high in the sky before Shirou could vocalize his thoughts.
The Griffin must have been near.
Shirou didn't hesitate.
"Quick, take cover." Shirou hissed and darted under a tall tree with heavy foliage.
"Don't leave me!" Aqua said, latching onto Kazuma's waist as he tried to follow Shirou.
Hitting the ground with a grunt, Kazuma scrambled on his hands and knees across the damp earth. Aqua followed close behind him.
"Do you think it saw us?" Kazuma asked Shirou, craning his neck to try and find the Griffin.
Shirou shook his head but traced his favorite bow as a precaution.
"No, it sounded far away, but it confirms we're in the right area."
Darkness shivered.
"This is so exciting, two great beasts hunting us like mice through the forest."
Shirou thought exciting might not be the right word, but it certainly piqued the adrenaline.
"Ok, before we go further, let's lay out the plan."
Aqua growled blue eyes narrowed.
"You're not using me as bait; you hear me! I'm a goddess—"
Shirou put a hand over Aqua's mouth and held a finger to his lips.
"You aren't going to be bait Aqua, and Kazuma quit teasing Aqua— you know she can be sensitive."
Shirou words filtered into Aqua's brain, and as they settled, her shoulders relaxed. Aqua unclenched her fists and removed Shirou's hands from her mouth, revealing a small smile. A soft breeze shook the leaves above, allowing a shaft of sunlight to break through and delicately caress Aqua's features.
Beautiful.
"So, Kazuma wanted to tease me? That's fine. After all, it's not like I could share his obsessions with 2D women with you.
Kazuma's face went white.
"Or how he has a body pillow of Sailor Moon stashed in his closet and a folder on his computer titled homework but contains—"
Kazuma cut Aqua off with a hand, eyes wide and sweat pouring from his face.
"I'm sorry, I'm sorry! I'll never tease you again! Please stoppppp!"
Megumin slid away from Kazuma, keeping her staff between him and herself.
"You really are a massive perv, aren't you?"
Kazuma jerked as if shot by an arrow and whimpered.
Shirou rolled his eyes. Things had started so smoothly. Now he needed to remind everyone what they were hunting.
"Enough."
Shirou's voice held a rarely heard firmness, drawing everyone's attention to him. A passerby may have commented how Shirou appeared as a parent scolding his children.
"Our last few quests have been simple, with weak enemies. These monsters we're looking for, they're hunters, army killers, and we are in their territory."
Shirou brooked no argument. He knew the consequences of fighting powerful enemies, the realities of a life-and-death struggle. He needed to make sure they understood as well.
"As such, I've been thinking about how we're going to fight, and I expect you'll do what I'm about to tell you to the letter."
No one moved, frozen under the force of Shirou's stare. Even Darkness, who couldn't help but associate Shirou's behavior with his kingly presence the night before, found herself still and focused.
With no argument coming from the group, Shirou leaned in close.
"Here's what we're going to do..."
Darkness often found it difficult to express her feelings. When she had approached Shirou and Kazuma two days prior, it had been on whim and rumor. However, once she found out about Shirou's sadistic tendencies, how could she not want to join?
Darkness found it challenging to keep her grim mask in place when she only wanted to scream her joy.
Last night had been more incredible than she had thought possible. With no more than a wooden sword, Shirou reduced her to goo in less than twenty minutes.
However, as he explained his plan to fight two of the most dangerous monsters in existence, he upped the ante.
Shirou's plan to engage the monsters? Brilliant!
True to Shirou's predictions, they heard the beasts before they saw them. Great shrieks and guttural roars echoed out as the Manticore and Griffin fought.
"Alright," Shirou whispered. "You all know the plan. Once we're close enough for Megumin to use her spell, she starts casting.
Darkness and I will act as the first line of defense if they charge us. Kazuma, you stay near Megumin and be ready to get her to safety using Lurk in case her Explosion doesn't kill the monsters. Aqua, be prepared to provide healing.
Shirou moved in a crouch, silent and graceful, a massive two-handed sword held at the ready.
Darkness tried to mirror his grace, but in her heavy metal armor, she may as well have been a bull in a china shop. Every step Darkness took heralded a clattering of steel, and the snapping of swigs. However, fortune favored Darkness. The monsters were deaf to the outside world to focus on their battle. The sounds of fighting grew louder with every meter of the ground traversed, and Darkness could feel the earth trembling as they came upon a thick line of trees and bush.
The Manticore and Griffin were just out of sight. Darkness could feel it in her bones, causing her heart to gallop against her ribs.
Shirou paused and looked back, seeking confirmation they were ready.
Darkness nodded, hands flexing around the hilt of her sword.
Megumin moved forward, magic already gathering in preparation to unleash her spell.
Kazuma and Aqua were trembling but looked ready to do their duty. Darkness grinned. Even though they acted cowardly, both had steel in them. Darkness would remember their courage and not judge them too harshly in the future.
"On my mark," Shirou said, muscles tightening visibly under his tight garb.
Darkness shook herself, now was not the time for distraction.
"Three, two... one."
Shirou bolted forward, sword held high.
Darkness followed close behind, ready to engage in the most epic battle of her life,
Darkness froze mid-step, mouth agape.
'...Oh crap, oh crap, oh crap.'
Kazuma found himself in a loop as Shirou counted down.
When Shirou laid out his plan, Kazuma fell backward and looked up at Shirou with wide eyes.
Everything leading up to that moment led Kazuma to think Shirou's idea of strategic engagement started and stopped at 'hit-it-till-it-dies.'
Not a big deal when you were as strong as Shirou. A massive deal when your arms shake like an overcooked noodle trying to do a push-up.
Kazuma felt the world's weight lift from his shoulders as Shirou laid out his plan. Not only did it give them a chance to win, but it necessitated that Kazuma run away from the fighting after Megumin used her Explosion.
Flawless planning!
Alas, Kazuma should have known something would inevitably go wrong. He couldn't call himself a genius, but his pattern recognition skills were more developed than a goldfish's. Since arriving in Axle, nothing had gone as expected. His first sight of a legendary being proved no different.
"Uh. Kazuma, I don't think they're fighting," Aqua said, hand over her mouth.
No shit.
The Griffin and Manticore weren't fighting. They were humping!
The Griffin had the head and front legs of an eagle with the back end of a horse, while the Manticore had the body of a lion with a writhing serpent for a tail. Both creatures had great wings jutting from their backs and were the size of a bus. They were also going at it more fiercely than Kazuma thought possible.
How the hell does that even work? There's no way these things can mate!
The Griffin, its beak carving a trench in the ground as the Manticore proudly thrust into it from behind, unexpectedly thrashed and stood up.
Kazuma's eyes widened as he witnessed that mating wasn't what the creatures were trying to do.
This is a horrible nightmare. I'm going to wake up any moment back home in Japan.
As the beasts enjoyed a gay ol' time, Kazuma gripped Megumin's shoulder and pulled her in front of him.
"They're not going to get any more distracted than this Megumin, do your thing."
Megumin covered her good eye with a hand and squirmed.
"I-I d-don't know if that would be right. I mean, it seems rude to interrupt..."
Rude to interrupt?! Since when had Megumin started to give a damn about inconveniencing others?!
"Shirou, tell her to blast them!"
Shirou looked... distant? Like he was trying hard not to let the situation affect him. Lowering his sword, Shirou robotically turned to Megumin, face set in a grim line.
"Megumin, sometimes, to be a hero, you must make sacrifices that others can not. I know it's difficult, but you must shoulder this burden and unleash your Explosion."
Over dramatic much!
Regardless of Kazuma's opinion, Shirou's words appealed to Megumin, who swallowed and stood tall.
"I understand. Please don't judge me for what I'm about to do."
Megumin's face paled as she forced herself to look at the frolicking monsters, and her staff trembled as she leveled it at them.
"F-find peace in the might of m-my power." The air began to swirl around Megumin, picking-up leaves and twigs to form a cyclone around the girl. "Find eternity in the might of my magic!" Magical circles formed, glowing brightly as the magic reached its crescendo. "Embrace the might of... Explosion!"
Like a bolt cast by Zeus himself, Megumin's magic lanced from the sky, it slammed into the ground with the force of a hurricane, obliterating everything it touched.
Winds howled fiercely, forcing Kazuma to shield his eyes from the dust and debris, but it ended as quickly as it began.
Kazuma blinked in amazement. This was the second time he'd seen the pint-sized wizard unleash her spell, but the results were still incredible. Megumin's spell left a titanic crater and split the earth for ten meters beyond its epicenter.
I can't believe it.
Kazuma closed his eyes and shook his head as the smoke and dust cleared.
She missed!
Indeed. Both the Manticore and Griffin had stopped their frantic rutting and stared at the crater that appeared more than 20 meters away from them.
"..."
Kazuma stared at Megumin.
Shirou stared at Megumin.
The Griffin and Manticore stared at Megumin.
Poor Megumin collapsed, shame radiating from her in a visible misaim.
"Leave me here and save yourselves. I cannot bare the humiliation."
A piercing shriek and a bellowing roar made Kazuma whimper.
"Kazuma!" Shirou said, eyes never leaving the two beasts as they surged to their feet.
"Get Megumin out of here. Aqua—"
"Everyone for themselves!"
Aqua took off with a scream, arms waving over her head.
Alas, Aqua had forgotten a crucial element of Manticores and Griffins. They were hybrid beasts, primarily made of birds and cats, who loved nothing more than to pounce.
"Ahhhh! Help me, Shirou! Help meeeee!"
Aqua screamed as she fled with the Griffin and Manticore chasing after her.
Kazuma picked up Megumin.
"Well, at least we don't have to worry about it coming after us."
"Hang on, Aqua!" Shirou brought his sword over his head, and it glowed crimson. "Hrunting!" Shirou threw the blade with a shout.
Kazuma gawked as the sword turned into a spinning disc of crimson energy and slammed Griffin, causing it to fall, tripping up the Manticore as it did.
Aqua continued to sprint until she reached them, latching onto Darkness as she did.
Shirou sighed and shook his head.
"I really didn't want to do this."
Arching his back slightly, Shriou held out his left hand.
"Trace, on"
Kazuma focused. Those were the words Shirou used to trace his sword last night. This time, however, Shirou didn't create a wooden toy.
Shirou held a massive black bow, and as it formed, the Griffin and Manticore stood and shook their great heads.
Kazuma wanted to scream.
Such a small projectile had no chance of hurting these monsters. So what could Shirou be thinking?
The ground shook as the monsters charged, but Shirou didn't waver.
"I am the bone of my sword."
Kazuma choked. He had been impressed by Megumin's power, but what Shirou was doing sucked the air from his lungs.
Something formed above Shirou's right hand, and it couldn't be called an arrow. Instead, a meter in length, it looked like a lance with a series of corkscrewing spikes jutting from it.
Shirou brought the weapon to his bowstring, and metal screamed as he pulled it back.
"My core is twisted into madness, Caladbolg!"
Boom!
Kazuma didn't have a chance to follow the weapon's path as a detonation sent him flying.
Landing with a thud, Kazuma barely had time to finch as Megumin crashed down on top of him.
"Owww."
Not moving, Kazuma tried to listen past his ringing ears.
"Wow," Megumin coughed as dust entered her mouth. "Such a wonderful explosion."
Kazuma groaned. So two of his party members could apocalypse, grand.
The monster hadn't stood a chance. Shirou's attack obliterated them completely.
When asked why that hadn't been the plan to begin with, Shirou looked embarrassed.
'I wanted to let you guys participate.'
A kind sentiment that Aqua, Megumin, and Darkness gobbled up.
Kazuma grumbled.
Seriously, how powerful could one person be?
Still, not even Kazuma could deny the spring in his step as they walked through Axle's main gate until they made it into the guild.
"... What's going on?"
Shirou didn't have a clue. They walked into the guild and found it packed to the rafter with adventures. All of them were laughing as they drank deeply from mugs of ale and bottles of wine. Unfortunately, some newer and younger adventurers were already passed out on the floor to be treaded upon with nothing but a slurred, 'Sorry! in return.
"Shirou!"
Luna pushed her way through the crowd. Her face flushed, and she smiled wide.
"I'm so glad you've returned safely!"
Over the noise of the party, it was challenging to hear Luna, and the slight slur in her speech didn't help.
"Luna, what's going on?"
"What?"
Luna held a hand to her ear, swaying in place.
"What is going on?!"
"Oh, you missed it since you took that super dangerous quest I told you not to take."
Shirou laughed awkwardly and looked at the ground, abashed. Luna had tried to convince him against taking the quest vehemently. Shirou didn't listen, though; because the five-person party comprised four people with advanced jobs, Luna had little option but to give it to them.
"Sorry again."
Luna giggled and brushed her hand against Shirou's arm.
"That's ok because you're back safe and sound, but it is too bad you missed it."
"Missed what!"
Kazuma got fed up with the play-by-play between Shirou and Luna, the only ordinary woman he had met since appearing in this crazy world.
Luna turned her dopey drunken smile on Kazuma, causing his heart to skip a beat.
"The annual cabbage hunt, of course
Cabbage hunt? Kazuma cast his eye skyward, trying to figure out why people made less sense the longer he knew them.
"We missed the cabbage?" Megumin said, her lips quivering.
Luna hugged the younger girl, stroking her hair as Megumin began to fight for her freedom, slowly suffocating in Luna's cleavage.
Kazuma looked to Shirou to see if he knew why cabbage made everyone go crazy.
Shirou shrugged. Kazuma turned away, unsurprised.
"Kazuma!"
Chris, the thief who taught Kazuma, wandered over to the group, a wide Cheshire smile on her face.
"How's it going, my thiefy buddy, can't believe you missed out on all that easy money, but oh well, more for meeeee!"
Luna released Megumin and threw an arm over Chris's shoulder.
"Chris is this year's cabbage champion. This year's batch of cabbage is of excellent quality, so the guild agreed to pay 10,000 Eris per head."
Not fair!
Luna continued her explanation, either unaware or uncaring of the growing red hue of Kazuma's face.
"Using her thief skills, Lurk, Steal, and Capture Christ managed to make over a million Eris!"
Kazuma's jaw dropped. A million Eris! By hunting cabbage! The quest to hunt two army killer monsters only paid 800,000, and he had to split that reward five ways.
Kazuma opened his mouth, but no sound came out, only a dry wheeze.
Aqua had no such problem.
"That's not fair!"
Aqua's wail drew every eye in the guild to them.
"We fought a Manticore and a Griffin, and it only paid 800,000! A Manticore and a Griffin! Because we did that, I missed out on a million Eris! Not fair! Not fair!"
Aqua sank to her knees and wept, covering her face with her hands.
The partying adventures stared at Aqua, shrugged, and returned to partying, too drunk to give a crap about the sobbing goddess.
Shirou, unable to resist the cry of the helpless, knelt and rested a hand on her shoulder.
"There, there."
Shirou's technique left something to be desired.
A week went by since Kazuma and his party returned from their quest. It had been an unremarkable week, at the demand from Kazuma and Aqua. Still shell-shocked over missing so much easy money, they insisted on rest and relaxation while enjoying their spoils. After all, 160,000 still went a long way. So while Aqua enjoyed her fancy wine, Kazuma opted for a more practical application. He upgraded his equipment to include a lightly enchanted belt for storage and got a better short sword.
Kazuma had initially not wanted to buy the sword. After all, what good did it do him to have a walking armory in the party if said armory couldn't give him one sword?
'Sorry, Kazuma, but it doesn't work that way.' Shirou told Kazuma when he asked for a sword. 'I can trace you a plain sword with no problem, but there are specific activation criteria for a magical one, so they won't work for you.'
At Kazuma's insistence, Shirou produced the same weapon he had used to slay Manticore and Griffin.
Kazuma had witnessed its power.
He wanted it.
However, as soon as Kazuma touched it, the sword became as inert and heavy as any other plain lump of steel.
Kazuma couldn't use a magical sword, and after some investigating, he found out he lacked the skills required.
Righteous Faith, Holy Light, Master Swordsman, and Hill Killer? All skills beyond Kazuma's reach and, in some cases, interest. Because, in truth, Kazuma found himself at a crossroads.
This world didn't meet his expectations. Kazuma thought everything would be like a video game. He would quickly advance, become a hero, and enjoy the spoils. So far, he'd only been slimed on, humped, and traumatized. What's worse, he had a team that, on paper, should be freaking awesome.
They weren't awesome! They were the opposite of awesome!
Kazuma fell forward, forehead thumping on the wooden guild table.
"I want to go home."
As if summoned by Kazuma's misery, Aqua slammed open the door to the guild hall and came sprinting in.
"Kazuma! Kazuma!"
Kazuma began to thumb his head against the table, trying to ignore the worst decision he had ever made.
"Kazumaaaa!"
Aqua threw herself onto the table, wailing like a toddler in a supermarket.
"Please, lend me some money!"
Kazuma's eye twitched. Lend Aqua money?
Is she retar?—Scratch that—of course, she is.
Knowing he would regret asking, but seeing few other options, Kazuma sat up and looked at Aqua properly.
"You just got plenty of cash. How the hell did you already spend it all?"
Aqua sniffled and wiped her nose.
"L-last night, I decided to take a walk, sharing my divine wisdom, and I stumbled upon a loyal priest of the Axis faith, Father Marley."
She got so plastered last night she couldn't find the inn.
"He told me of the dire straits the church is in and asked for a donation. How could I turn him away? So, I asked him how much the church needed to continue to spread the word of Me, and he asked, 'how much you got?' so I told him." Aqua gazed into the distance. "You should have seen how his eyes lit up when I told him I had 100,000 Eris because that was the exact amount he needed!"
Proving drunken Aqua is stupider than sober Aqua by a factor of ten.
"He looked like I had reached down from the heavens and delivered him salvation." Aqua sat up and placed a hand on her chest, looking nose pointed to the ceiling. "So I gave him all my money and single-handedly saved the Axis church."
She got scammed and is proud of it.
Kazuma stared with dead eyes, trying to ignore the raging fire that burned in his belly. He didn't know why he still got mad at Aqua. If Kazuma expected stupidity from the goddess, it made no sense to keep getting angry at her for doing stupid things. It seemed like the equivalent of getting mad at the water for being wet and the sky for being blue.
Utterly pointless.
"Kazuma! Quit ignoring me!"
Calm and Zen.
"Seriously, Kazuma, I need some money to cover my tab at the bar."
Kazuma's eye twitched.
"I didn't expect to give away my money, so I still owe 60,000."
Kazuma exploded up, knocking his chair backward as he did.
"You owe how much!"
Aqua tapped her index fingers together, cheeks going pink.
"60,000 Eris."
Kazuma clenched his jaw so tightly he could form a complete sentence.
"You... How... So much."
Turning away from Aqua, Kazuma closed his eyes and took some deep breaths, praying for patients... but then remembered the source of his rage was a goddess and gave up.
"Hey, guys, I'm surprised you beat me here today."
Kazuma jumped, eyes flying open as Shirou spoke right before him. It freaked Kazuma out that he never heard the guy coming, though he'd found a hack for that in Darkness whose armor clattered with every step. In the last week, she had rarely been seen more than a few feet away from Shirou. Something about learning from a true master. Kazuma felt sure she enjoyed the scathing and jealous glares of all the women who liked Shirou. As such, Kazuma found himself surprised when he found no Darkness accompanying Shirou.
Kazuma decided not to dwell on the reason, happy to have someone to vent his frustration.
"Shirou, you won't believe what Aqua—"
Aqua's hand clamped down on Kazuma's mouth like a vice.
"Don't you dare say anything to Shirou," Aqua said, whispering into Kazuma's ear.
Kazuma shivered, but he wasn't sure whether it was due to Aqua's warm breath caressing his ear or her threatening tone.
Turning his head to the side, Kazuma froze as beads of sweat gathered on his brow. Aqua's eyes were wide, glowing with unholy blue light, and her pupils had shrunk to the size of pinpricks.
"I'm going to let you go, nice and easy, and we're going to pretend this never happened. You got it?"
Kazuma gulped and nodded.
When did Aqua get so intimidating?
Aqua removed her hand and transformed, flashing Shirou a ditzy smile.
"Hey Shirou, no Darkness today?"
Kazuma ignored their conversation, trying to process what had just happened.
Has Aqua become a yandere?
The thought terrified Kazuma. Aqua proved crazy enough on an average day, and he couldn't deal with finding her sniffing Shirou's underwear while on a quest.
Seeing Megumin, Kazuma fled the scene and hoped it would disappear if he pretended nothing was happening.
Fat chance.
"Ah, Kazuma, I'm pleased you are here." Megumin proudly held up her newly purchased staff. "I must insist you look upon the tool that shall lead to this world destruction!"
Kazuma's eye twitched.
Goddamn Chunii!
However, between Megumin's tweeny nonsense and Aqua's... whatever, Kazuma would choose Megumin every time.
Looking at the staff Megumin held out with pride, Kazuma had to give it to the girl; it was badass.
"So this is a coranite staff?"
Rubbing the staff against her cheek, Megumin corrected Kazuma.
"Not completely. Coranite is rarer than rare, so it naturally costs a fortune. This only has a small shard, but even so, it should increase the power of my Explosion quite a bit."
At least Megumin stayed in character, stupid though it may be.
Kazuma hadn't been shocked to hear that magical staff had different attributes depending on the materials used in their construction.
Megumin, naturally, had chosen coranite, a stone the same crimson color as her eyes, because it greatly enhanced explosive power. While Kazuma doubted she could destroy the world with it, he wasn't sure the town would be standing much longer.
"Why don't we go and test that sucker out?"
Megumin perked up and latched onto Kazuma's sleeve.
"Yes! Yes, I can't wait any longer!"
Megumin's staff began to glow ominously, and Kazuma chopped her on the head without hesitation.
"Wait until we're out of town first, dummy."
"... I hope the town appreciates my sacrifice," Kazuma said, stomping after a skipping Megumin.
Due to the power of Megumin's explosion spell, letting one off just outside the town's wall was not an option. So, Kazuma let Megumin drag him on a merry walk along a path that snaked its way among the fields of green hills.
Usually, Kazuma would have insisted Shirou accompany them if they were going to wander so far from safety. Still, the monster population was at an all-time low, so he risked it.
Kazuma considered himself fortunate that Shirou had not heard of the Devil King's general in the area. For some reason, most other adventurers avoided Shirou. As such, he rarely heard of the gossip floating around town.
"OH, look at that!" Megumin pointed to a crumbling castle on a hill a ways off. "That'll be the perfect target to demonstrate my new power!"
Kazuma didn't argue. He'd heard around the guild that there were a couple such places around town, all abandoned and thoroughly looted. Hence, adventurers never bother to visit them. The guild had a policy that if you could knock one down— do it since they served as perfect monster nests.
Kazuma felt the familiar prickle of Megumin beginning to channel her Explosion spell.
"May my power of Darkness, blacker than black, serve as proof of my ultimate, undeniable strength! Explosion!"
A series of three magic circles appeared above the castle, spinning concentrically as power lanced down them and crashed into the castle with a cacophonous boom.
Kazuma gaped. That was the most enormous Explosion he'd ever seen Megumin unleash.
Man, who knew a new staff could make much of a difference.
As the smoke began to clear, Kazuma blinked. The castle looked no more ruined than it had before Megumin's blast.
How disappointing.
"Guess you've still got a way to go there, Megumin, the castle is still standing."
"What!" Megumin said, voice muffled from where she lay face first in the grass. "How is that possible? The castle must have protections because that Explosion had to be a 10 out of 10."
Kazuma hummed and nudged Megumin with his foot to roll her over.
"I'd give it a five at most. Especially compared to Shirou's."
Megumin pouted at Kazuma, looking like a child whose candy had been stolen.
"You take that back."
"Nope. Not while that castle is still standing."
A crimson eye shone as Kazuma laid down his challenge.
"Then we agree. You shall come with me every day we don't have a quest, so I may unleash an Explosion upon this castle until it is reduced to dust."
Kazuma knelt and got Megumin situated on his back to begin the journey back to Axle.
Why not? It took only a short time; besides, there are certain... benefits.
Smiling a grin Darkness would be proud of, Kazuma hitched Megumin higher.
"On second thought, I'll ask Shicou. I can practically feel the sleaze wafting off you."
Kazuma schooled his features and turned his head to glare at Megumin.
"Rude."
Where are those two?
Aqua glanced at the door every few seconds, fidgeting next to Shirou.
Kazuma's probably off peaking at the bathhouse, but Megumin usually arrived at the guild in time for lunch.
"Shirouuu, do we have to wait for them?"
Aqua found it ridiculous that she even had to take a quest so soon after the horrors of the last one, but her bar tab needed to be paid, or they'd cut her off!
Aqua didn't tell Shirou about her newly indebted status. Naturally, she couldn't let him think ill of her. However, she still needed the money, and stupid Kazuma decided to be stingy. So, with no other choice, Aqua made something up about wanting to take a quest to level up.
Leveling up could be difficult as a priest, given they weren't front-line fighters. Luckily Aqua knew of a loophole, the undead. As fate would have it, a graveyard outside Axle had been having some issues recently. Unfortunately, Shirou insisted the entire party be there to act as support in case something went wrong.
"There is no harm in waiting, Aqua. Besides, the suspected zombie maker only appears after dark anyway." Darkness said, sipping from a cup of tea on Shirou's other side.
Stupid Darkness.
Aqua crossed her arms with a huff. She couldn't even get a drink to help pass the time. Why did the world always have to be against her?
Shirou chuckled and patted Aqua's shoulder sympathetically.
"I get you're impatient, but why don't I treat us to lunch? After all, you can't fight on an empty stomach."
My guardian angel!
Aqua latched onto Shirou and rubbed her face into his shoulder, ignoring Darkness' indignant exclamation as she did.
"Thank you, Shirou! Can I have some fried frog, cabbage stir fry, and cream puffs for dessert?"
If ever there was a time to be grateful for her divine form, mealtimes were it. Aqua could eat anything she wanted and never gain a pound.
Shirou nodded, and Aqua sprung up, determined to find a server to meet her needs.
Skipping along, Aqua luxuriated on the eyes that followed her, no doubt awed by her presence.
"Hellooo."
Aqua met the eyes of a waitress who frowned at her for some reason.
She was probably nervous about someone of my stature speaking to her.
Nerves had nothing to do with it.
The waitress in question had been tasked to clean up when Aqua had been sick a week previously and still hadn't forgiven her. However, professionalism wouldn't allow her to ignore a customer right before her.
"Hello, miss. How can I assist you?"
Aqua relayed her order while dancing in place, already salivating.
"... And charge it to Shirou, please."
The waitress smiled and tilted her head to the side.
"I'm afraid I can't do that."
"Huh?"
"As an employee of the guild, I must faithfully serve and assist all our adventurers. Mr. Shirou is a kind and generous man. It would be a disservice to Shirou if I were to let you take advantage of him."
Aqua sputtered, hopes of delicious food shattered under the waitress's professional smile.
"B-but he said it was ok!"
The waitress shook her head with deliberate slowness.
Aqua didn't understand! She thought it ridiculous that she had to pay for food at all, dammit! She was one of this world's patron goddesses. These people should be honored to feed her free of charge! But the stupid waitress refused to serve her even though she could pay for it, preposterous!
Gritting her teeth, Aqua glared at the waitress.
"How about I ask Shirou to come over and ask you himself?
"That would be most helpful. I can confirm with Shirou that he agreed to help you since you cannot pay off your 60,000 Eris tab."
Suddenly, Aqua felt minuscule under the weight of that professional smile.
"Y-you, why?"
The despondency and heartbreak in Aqua's tone would have, should have, broken anybody.
The waitress leaned in close, her smile fading as the dew before the morning dawn.
"The drunk tank."
Aqua's face turned white and green as she remembered the awful experience. She couldn't argue further.
Her shoulders slumped, and feeling queasy, Aqua turned and walked away.
"Hey, Aqua," Kazuma said as he walked into the guild with Megumin sleeping on his back.
Kazuma, It's all his fault!
Fire restored, Aqua stomped to the boy, and he took a step back.
Good, he could be humbled before my splendor!
"You! Buy me lunch!"
"W-What? Buy your own lunch, you mooch."
Aqua's eyes widened, and she jabbed Kazuma in the chest with her finger.
"You know I can't do that," Aqua whispered, leaning in close. "Have I told you goddesses have enhanced senses? Sight, hearing, and smell are all part of the package."
"S-so, what?" Kazuma tried to bluff, but Aqua could see the sweat on his upper lip.
"We share a wall at the inn. Does the name Strawberry ring a bell?"
Kazuma flinched as if struck and glanced frantically at Megumin, who remained asleep on his back.
"You utter bitc—"
Aqua took a deep breath and cupped her hands around her mouth.
"I mean! Of course, I'll buy you lunch, Aqua."
The words spilled from Kazuma's lips so fast she could barely understand him.
Aqua smiled. It was about time Kazuma learned to respect her position.
Quest completed, lunch acquired.
Time for some character development, kinda! We'll see how it goes.
Thanks for reading!
