FOURTEEN

Yet again, I have found myself astonished by this world I found myself in. Not only have I found myself faced with a Genestealer threat, that xenos brought another victim here. At least it was someone I rather enjoyed whom's presence, Felicia Tayber. I first met her when I was but a young, wet-behind-the-ears Commissar on (what would be my future home) Perlia. Granted, I may have utterly wiped out her home of Prosperity Wells*241, but it was for a good cause, I assure you*242. I had to forcibly shake my head, stopping myself from reminiscing (which may have looked rather queer, since I was within the presence of Batman, Black Canary, and the Greenskin). I didn't expect Felicia to revert in age, let alone the fact I could see her face now. Gone were her augmetics that covered half of her skull, and back in that familiar dull orange hair and fair complexion I remembered her from back then. The only thing that remained that I knew she got when she made Magos were the extra two mechadendrites.

'I can't believe it.' I started, returning my gaze back at the Heroes before me. 'When did this happen?'

'We only found out around four hours ago at the Star Labs facility in Taos, New Mexico.' Batman explained. 'Originally, the scientists were initiating a test using the radiation that was discovered by your entry.' Seriously? That's actually a thing*243? 'The test, they claimed, was successful. In only sending things from your dimension to ours.' Oh great, so they can even summon Daemons here too. Wonderful. Absolutely wonderful. 'I know. Nonetheless, she's here now and we believe that your presence may smooth things over.'

'Why not the Inquisitor?' I asked, really wishing that my suggestion works. After all, I would rather get some nice sleep. That, and enjoy some time with Jurgen as he serves me a hot cup of Tanna tea.

'Are you not the Hero of the Imperium?' Black Canary said, though I could see her lips curling up. 'Surely she would recognize the man on the propaganda posters.'

'How would you know about-' She pointed at the Greenskin Martian, who shrugged.

'I saw glimpses of Amberley's visions.' He stated, monotonously as I expected him to be. Perhaps the Mechanicus learnt that aspect of their personalities from them*244? 'You make for a dashing figure.' Of course he's focusing on that.

'I am inviting you to come with us to help smooth things over.' You mean, you are "politely" ordering me to do it, on pain of forcing me to do more paperwork. Oh, he's good. 'We are also having Gunner to join you as well.' Well, at least there are some upsides to this arrangement. Sorry Amberley, but Jurgen's mine now*245. 'We leave in five.' Oh course, always on the move.


The moment we landed*246 (yes I do mean landed, at this Star Labs) I was immediately faced with the absolute chaos that was Felicia Tayber. She, and the gaggle of "scientists", were busy building and racing miniaturized Sentinel walkers. Next, she'll arm them with claw arms, a heavy flamer, and maybe something worse! And those fools are giving in to her every whim, supporting her every want, and are already transporting a dumpster filled to the brim of…of, raw material to support her! I need a drink!

'Tanna tea for you sir.' Jurgen said, which I was always glad for. I had missed my faithful aide for the longest time, and I finally have my Tanna tea. I took some time to enjoy the bitter flavour.

'Thank you Jurgen.' I said, sparing a glance at Batman and Black Canary. 'Pardon me while I catch up with an old friend.' Earning the usual looks*247 from them. At least this isn't a real dangerous situation I found myself in. I approached my white robed, fair skinned, pale oranged-haired friend. To think that Xenos had reverted her age like me. When she fully appreciated me, her mouth gaped. I would too, if the situations were reversed. If anything, I would be too. Gone was the augmetics that replaced half of her skull. Instead, she looked exactly how I remembered her from the First Siege of Perlia, albeit a tad bit younger. She still had her extra mechadendrites, so I suppose the Xenos didn't take everything away from her.

'Ciaphas?!' Felicia finally shouted from her comfortable seat of her walker. 'By the Omnissiah, it is you!'

'Great to see you again Felicia.' I admitted. 'Mind coming down from there? I believe there are some matters to discuss.' She shifted her head, now seeing Black Canary, Batman, and Jurgen.

'Sure thing Ciaphas.' She said in her usual chipper way I had come to know her for. She hopped on down, and only then did I realize just how short she was compared to me. It must have shown on my face, since Felicia started to frown. 'Is there something on my face?'

'Oh, nothing of the short.' I said, trying to play my slip-up casually.

'Uh huh, I'm sure it is.' I suddenly felt her mechadendrite coil around my legs, under my red sash, and into and out of my button-up dress shirt*248. All while that's happening, she was using her other mechadendrites to elevate her a few centimetres above my head. 'Who's short now?' I tried to stifle my laughter, but it didn't work out as well as I thought. What I didn't expect was for her to embrace me tightly. 'When I heard about what happened to your ship, I feared the worst.'

'How much time has passed since my disappearance?' I asked, more out of curiosity than any actual concern for how I'm perceived. After all, I am replaceable*249.

'A hundred years.' She said, closing her eyes and looking away. I couldn't believe it. A hundred years have passed and-hold on a tick. Why you- 'Oh, by the Omnissiah, you should have seen the look on your face! Oh, I got that engraved in my memory for time to come!' Which was followed up by more laughter at my expense. 'It's only been a few days really.' Oh, that's not that bad then. Suddenly, my nostrils were hit by the familiar bouquet that was my aide. 'Hello Jurgen, still being a cog?'

'Just doing my duty ma'am.' He said, a pleasant smile on his face.

'And who are they?' She asked, pointing at the Heroes.

'These are two members of the local Planetary Defence Force Leadership.' I began, trying my best to sound a bit serious. 'They refer to themselves as Black Canary and Batman.'

'Seriously?' Her deadpan was quite reasonable, I will admit, but if I want to keep my standing with the Justice League I had to soften the blow, as it were.

'Mainly for propaganda value.' I did my best, honest. 'The Justice League.' Another look. 'As the locals call their PDF here, they act as Arbites as well, and are funded by a rather clever fundraising program.' The Hall of Justice is a rather nice tourist trap. 'They call themselves Heroes, which does wonders for morale, especially against the criminal class.'

'Seriously.' Oh yes, Felicia is underwhelmed.

'I'm afraid the criminal class are in possession of unique technologies.' I hazard a shrug, though it did perk her mood up.

'Well, why didn't you say so!' She cheered. 'Do tell.'

'Later, I'm afraid.' I said, finding myself in the perfect position to carry her on my back. From her point-of-view, of course. No offence to Felicia, but I rather give one to Amberley*250. I nonetheless approached the two, a smile on Black Canary's face growing ever so slightly. 'Perhaps it is time to go?'

'NNNNNNNOOOOOOOOOO!' Turning around, those gaggle of "scientists" somehow got themselves organized into a mob. 'You can't take her from us!' One cried out, leveling some sort of sidearm at me.

'Yeah, we haven't had this kinda breakthrough in years!' Another said, her polearm already sparking with blue electric whips ready to skewer me.

'You take her away now, we'd never have this much fun–I mean, excitement–I mean, oh forget it.' The more delusional, older fellow huffed. He was mounting some sort of mechanical horse*251, unsheathing some sort of sabre from somewhere, and–holy frak, that mechanical monstrosity*252 is rearing! The insane frakker is going to charge us!

'GIVE HER BBBBBBBAAAAAAAACCCCCCCKKKKKKKK!' Was their insane warcry as they charged us.

Well, frak.


After the mess that was the Star Labs uprising*253, we arrived at Mount Justice. The ride itself wasn't too bad, sans Jurgen's airsickness, however, it did get awkward at times. Felicia was busy taking measure of every millimetre of the craft, probably documenting it in hopes to bring it back home, claim it as an STC*254, and earn some favours with the Mechanicus hierarchy. Nonetheless, we arrived at Mount Justice unscathed enough to walk off with no incidents, sans Jurgen who vomited over at the garbage can.

'We are getting a new member of the Team?' Aqualad said, not realizing we were coming from behind. I suppose I got too used to the Greenskin Martian, the AI, and the Orangeskin Xenos since Felicia started to squeeze my shoulders. I patted her hand, trying to be as comforting as I could.

'Not exactly.' The Martian waved me over, getting the Team's reactions. 'Commissar, if you can please introduce your friend?'

'Gladly.' I said, letting Felicia down. I nodded at her, hoping my smile would sway any current fears she has to stand up against the mutants and xenos. 'My I present to you, Magos Felicia Tayber, Techpriestess of the Adeptus Mechanicus.'

'Magos?' Kid Flash said, an eyebrow raised. 'What, like a magician?'

'It's just a title.' Felicia replied offhandedly. 'Besides, magic doesn't exist.' That got him smiling again. 'Like Cain said, I'm Felicia.' She reveals her mechadendrites. 'I hope we get along.' They snap at the xenos.

'So. Techpriestess.' Robin asked, leaning in. 'What do you do exactly?'

'In essence, I build and fix things.' She replied. 'Kinda comes with the name, y'know?'

'So what, you pray for things to work?' The little git asked, actually pretty confused.

'Oh yes, we do. We also like to burn incense and dump metric tons of oil on top of our machines.' She deadpanned. I'll admit, the look on the Team's faces was too good to pass up. Honestly, did they really think the Mechanicus would do something so silly*255? Then Felicia started laughing, which got them to relax, even giggle a little. 'We have ancient scrolls called instruction manuals and we follow them. C'mon, lighten up a bit.'

'Sorry, sorry. I just thought you were serious.' Robin said, patting himself to calm himself. 'Just, why don't you call yourselves engineers and scientists then? Why Magos or techpriestess?'

'I don't really know, but it certainly simplifies things, being called Magos instead of all the various subcategories.' She shrugged, letting her prehensile tail to lock itself so she could sit on it. 'Besides, if you want to talk theology, well, I'm not really the best girl to talk about it.' Considering the fact that Felicia always was better at the more practical, rather than the spiritual. Also one of the reasons why she wasn't eligible for priesthood until after the First Siege of Perlia.

'But you achieved priesthood.' M'gann protested, which is fair, if I didn't know much more. 'Surely you must know a little of the theological side.'

'Well, I suppose so.' Felicia shrugged. 'Not much to tell really. We simply believe that knowledge itself is what is truly divine in the universe, gifted to us by our Machine God, the Omnissiah, who governs all technology, machinery, and creation.'

'So…you're part of a cult?' Kid Flash stated, earning glares from the others. 'What?'

'It is called the Cult Mechanicus.' Felicia teased, earning a victorious look from the Mutant. 'And we are tolerated by the Imperium at large. Mainly because we don't follow their Emperor.'

'You mean, our Emperor.' I said, since I still do have a reputation to keep in front of Jurgen.

'Whatever you say, Cai.' Oh by the God Emperor, why does everyone insist on using the shorter version of my name? Taking a glance at the Team, I knew my reputation had taken a slight blow for the better. Aqualad, the greenskin, and Wally were smirking at me; Robin was holding in his laughter; Super boy was giving me a thumbs up (I wonder why?); and the Orangeskin and Artemis were giving Felicia daggers. Oh dear, I better put a stop to that.

'Now, with introductions out of the way.' I began, feeling those glares shift onto me. 'I believe it's time for us to leave and–'

'Actually, the three of you are going to stay in this cave for the day.' Black Canary informed, a tad regretful. I suppose Batman had pulled some strings. 'Get to know the Team some more.'

'What of Amberley?' I queried, a tad uncomfortable about the idea. After all, she does not have an alibi.

'The Inquisitor is required elsewhere.' That's a lie, but I won't push it unless I get investigated, and I'm sure I am a lot less cunning that she is*256. 'For now, stay here.' They were returning to their craft, but not before Black Canary gave me a slight remorseful look. I wish I could tell her to not be, she had been one of my stalwart allies in this place.

'Well then, since we are here.' I began, unconsciously rubbing the back of my neck. 'Anyone up for food?'


The suggestion seemed to have paid off, since I was sitting on a delightfully soft couch. Unfortunately, I was forced to eat this pizza again. Honestly, do they have to make it this greasy? Drinks were, unfortunately, subpar. No amasec in sight, only this Coca-Cola. At a glance, Felicia was not too bothered by this. She always was a big eater, but I can't help but think she may be having a little bit too much.

'Go go go go go!' The two gits chanted, watching the resident Techpriestess down a tenth slice while chugging her fifth can of Coca-Cola. Even Super boy was joining in, going for his eleventh slice. I suffered a sigh as Jurgen prepared a saucer of Tanna.

'May I have a cup?' My Abhuman ally said, taking a seat beside me.

'Jurgen, if you would be so kind?' I kindly requested, which, as unimaginatively as ever, he acquiesced.

'Thank you.' He said, taking a sip. Kaldur winced, which was normal for any non-Valhallan. 'It's quite bitter.'

'Refreshing, no?' I commented, leaning back just as Jurgen placed a blanket on my lap.

'I would say so.' He set the cup aside, after taking in another sip. 'Mind if we talk?'

'I don't see why not.' I said, closing my eyes. 'What is the problem?' Must be a problem if he's ignoring Jurgen as well as he is.

'I want to ask about Jurgen.' Kaldur said, bringing up that remark again. 'I know he has powers. You know he has powers. So does Amberley. Yet, you hide him. Why?' Oh wonderful, now he'll demand an answer.

'What has Amberley told you?' I asked, playing for time.

'She simply said that Jurgen is the most powerful weapon against the enemies of man.' He explained, which I suppose gave me a conversation to direct his attention. 'That his abilities are to be kept secret, less he becomes a target.'

'Amberley isn't wrong.' I admitted, thinking back to all my adventures with my faithful aide, my best friend. 'Gunner First Class Ferik Jurgen is…special.' He looked at me, shifting his body posture, pride in his chest. 'Jurgen, why don't you keep Felicia company. I'm sure she needs the support.'

'As the Emperor Wills.' He droned, standing up to back her up. Now to deal with Kaldur.

'I am not lying when I say that Ferik Jurgen is special.' I admitted, opening my eyes to stare into the Abhuman's. 'Yes, he has powers, powers invaluable to the Imperium.' I leaned in to whisper. 'His powers are a rarity, and usually, those of the Inquisition makes use of them–'

'As living weapons.' Kaldur hissed. 'And Amberley?'

'Isn't like that.' I tried to assure. 'After all, he is my Aide, and trying to find another as resourceful as Jurgen would take a lifetime.' I saw Jurgen stepping in, using his body to shield Felicia from the orangeskin menace. 'If Amberley were to have taken him, well, I doubt I would see him again.' I'm sure one of her rivals might try to steal him from under her nose*257.

'How did you manage to convince her to let him stay as your aide?' He asked, warmth in his eyes. 'From what I understand, she has more power in the hierarchy.'

'They do answer only to the Emperor.' I joked, shifting to get a better seat. 'And it was all her. After all, it's much better to have a card up your sleeve, rather than play it outright.' He started to chuckle. What's so funny, it's true!

'You are a good man, Ciaphas.' Kaldur said, lightly punching my shoulder.

'Please, I am only doing my duty.' I waved off his attempt to butter me up. 'Besides, I am entirely replaceable in the Imperial Guard*258.'

'Not to me.' The Abhuman said, just as Robin took a seat beside me.

'Dude, Magos is awesome!' He cheered, just as I saw using her mechadendrites to fiddle with some junk to build something. I should put a stop to this, but I was trapped. This blanket is too cozy for me to even lift a finger. 'I mean, she must win a lot of eating contests! And how she still maintains her figure like that! How'd you meet?'

'Well-' I began, but Felicia interrupted me, a glint in her eyes. I don't like the looks of those eyes.

'Listen well, children of the Omnissiah…and xenos…listen well to the tale of Cain the Liberator!' Felicia began, using some napkins to stuff my mouth and mechadendrites to make sure it stays shut. This is going to be torture! 'I was but a simple Enginseer, working at the Mechanicus shrine of my hometown of Prosperity Wells. It was an honest life, and my family were ever the most excited when I became initiated as an Enginseer. Unfortunately, the dastardly xenos that were the Greenskins, the Orks, invaded my world.'

'Orks?' M'gann asked, and apparently Felicia somehow made a projection device from the junk, and it shifted through her memories or one such Ork.

'Mekboyz.' Jurgen gruffly stated, shoving a pizza slice into his mouth.

'A savage race, that knows only one thing best.' Felicia spat. Oh, now she's taking the piss and overly exaggerating. 'War. They came to my hometown. My brother was a soldier, and he and eight others were all that remains of the defenders. The rest were killed.' She now put on a sorrowful face. Oh, don't you dare. 'As for the residents that managed to survive, we were enslaved.' Oh, now she's playing images of her starvation and enslavement. 'We had lost all hope, and prayed to the Omnissiah for deliverance.' No. Oh no no no no no. I know that jingle.

'Ci-Ci-Ciaphas Cain, HERO OF THE IMPERIUM!' Everyone started laughing, and I could do little to hide my embarrassment. Not this frakking show! 'Ciaphas Cain: the Liberator had arrived to save my world of Perlia.' Robin grinned at me, not bothering to hide his amusement. Thankfully, he did pull the wet napkins out of my mouth.

'I'll have you know, that TV show was poorly made!' I protested, hoping someone would hear me. Instead, all I did was encourage their laughter.

'You got a TV show?' M'gann, however, was gushing. 'How?!'

'Because of his exploits on my world.' Felicia stated, showcasing my many (mis)deeds throughout that trek to return to friendly lines.

'I'll have you know that whatever that happened on the show is–' Then Felicia cuts me off.

'About 89.78% accurate.' She proudly proclaimed. 'The romance was fabricated, of course, And our favourite cog Jurgen was missing also, but it is still accurate.' Felicia leaned in, whispering into my ear in High Gothic. 'This is payback for what you did to the Dam.' Oh, not this again!

'I already apologized to you many times about what happened.' I whispered back. 'I truly am sorry.'

'Oh, I know, but this only comes once in a lifetime.' She cheered. 'Now, who wants to hear more stories about Cain?' And everyone cheered.


After hours of re-telling my adventures on Perlia, everyone finally seemed to retire. I was exhausted, and I can't wait to finally sleep on a nice comfortable bed. The only problem being that I just could not sleep. I don't know why, but every time I try to close my eyes, I just can't find it in myself to sleep. With little other option left, I felt it necessary to walk around. I wasn't expecting much. Unfortunately, it was not to be. Up ahead was the kitchen, and I could hear voices. You need not guess who they are.

'Now that everyone's here.' The Abhuman began. 'Let us begin. Robin, if you'd please.'

'A week ago, Artemis, Batman, and I had gone on patrol due to the recent "secret alliance" between the Korean and Italian Mafia.' He briefed, which definitely showed his newfound maturity. 'Initially, we believed it to be due to some sort of new drug deal. However, this alliance extended to Bane's Cartel as well. And that's what got us worried.'

'What, gang's teaming up?' The Mutant snorted. 'They do that all the time, and they'll backstab each other by the end of it.'

'That's what I thought too, but they aren't selling their products.' Artemis jumped in. 'They are stockpiling.'

'Stockpiling of the what product exactly?' The Orangeskin asked, her grammar utterly atrocious.

'Weapons.' Robin answered. 'Not just handguns but the big military-grade stuff. Rocket launchers, heavy machine guns. There has been talk about Bane purchasing surplus tanks.'

'I don't understand.' The Martian said, bewildered. 'Why would they need all that stuff if not to sell it?'

'Batman and I initially thought it was to set up a massive Black Market for Warlords.' Robin admitted. 'Kinda like an Underground Costco, but with military weapons.'

'That's actually a pretty smart idea.' Wally admitted. 'What, so like they wanted to secure a supply line so they are confident that whatever they're selling will push through?'

'Initially, that's what we thought.' Robin sighed. 'Artemis, you tell them your theory.'

'They are going to war.' She stated, and I felt my heart drop. That's as close to Amberley's plan than anything.

'But, against who?' Super boy asked.

'Aliens.' Artemis stated.

'What?!' The greenskin gasped, utterly shocked by that. Which, admittedly, wasn't entirely wrong but we are going after a specific species. Afterwards, who knows? 'But, who would–'

'We didn't have proof until Artemis gave us a Person-of-Interest.' Robin added, and I felt my heart freeze. 'The Inquisitor.' Cue the shocked exasperations. Honestly Amberley, must you be so indiscrete*260? 'We were skeptical at first, because we had no real proof. Only a silhouette.'

'What if we're wrong?' The Martian asked.

'We're hoping we're wrong.' Robin stated. 'But if we aren't, we gotta be ready.'

'Well, that'd be easy.' Wally stated, and I had to stifle a snort. Amberley? Easy? Hah! As if*261! 'We could just overpower her with powers.'

'But she has Bane as an ally.' The git reminded. 'She's the type willing to do anything to gain an edge over us. Including taking hostages. Listen, we all know what she really is on the inside.' Robin seemed to have pushed his stoll back, and I could just imagine him standing up. 'She's a manipulative, charismatic, cold-hearted monster.'

'Let's not forget, a deadpan snarker, dedicated to what she's doing.' Artemis listed. 'Oh, and she's an absolute psychopath. Honestly, how Cai can deal with her is beyond me.'

'Right, but what can we do?' Wally asked, which seemed pretty inane to me. Stay the frak away and hope for the best, like me. 'I mean, it's obvious she has some kind of hold over Cain and Jurgen. So, obviously, they'll fight by her side.' Most likely with great reluctance. I don't want to deal with them if I can help it. They're insane!

'I don't think so.' Artemis stated. 'Cain is actually willing to investigate her. Even told me to lead me to the scene of the crime. He'll support us.'

'Only if he suspects Amberley of betraying humanity's interests.' Robin reminded. 'He's just as brainwashed as she is to believe anything his wackjob Emperor of his.' Well, frak you too. I'm not an Emperor-botherer, I'll have you no.

'You think too little of Ciaphas Cain.' Aqualad said, coming to my defence. What a good, faithful Abhuman I found. 'I know of his character. He is a good man.' I'm sorry, what? 'Humble too. He isn't as brainwashed as you may think he is. When the time comes, I know he will choose the side of justice over whatever insanity the Inquisitor cooks up.' Which I will exercise by running the frak away and hiding out until it's safe.

'How do you know he'll do it?' The mutant pressed. 'The guy's hero name is Commissar. Y'know, ideological fanatics that will shoot whoever that goes against the state.' As well as those we simply don't like. 'I mean, look how he treats Jurgen.'

'Actually, from what I managed to get from the Commissar, he thinks of Jurgen as his only friend.' The greenskin said, which I imagined brought some shocked faces on the mutant and git. 'And I also think he doesn't give himself enough credit. I guess, the overall feeling is…well…hopelessness.'

'What do you mean M'gann?' Robin wondered.

'I guess I mean that, I don't think Ciaphas Cain wanted to become a Commissar.' She explained, and for once, I was happy someone got it right. 'I can't help but feel that all Ciaphas ever wanted was to be safe.'

'Yeah, I kinda had a feeling.' Artemis added. 'Back in Gotham, I learned that Cain was a gutter rat. Lived in the sewers.' Lower levels, but close enough. 'The only reason he entered his Commissar school was because both of his parents died and they forced him to attend.'

And with what we understand of his home, it was in constant war.' Kaldur said. 'But we also know that he cares for his soldiers under him. As far as we can see from Felicia's presentation, not once did we see him ever shoot his own soldiers. He was leading slaves to freedom and always made sure they were safe when the enemy attacked. He may think he is doing his duty, but I can see him for what he truly is. A hero*262.' There were some murmurs, which I assumed were of agreement.

'Still, there is Jurgen.' Wally said. 'Let's face it, we know Amberley treats him like a weapon.'

'He doesn't seem like a Superman.' Super boy said the obvious.

'His power is unique. Something that cancels out other powers like M'gann's telekinesis or my water bearers.' Kaldur said. 'That is why Amberley likes to use him as a weapon. If not for Ciaphas' intervention, we may not have seen Jurgen. I am confident that given his loyalty to Cain, he will fight alongside us.'

'I too, am in the agreement.' The orangeskin said. 'They are warriors most honourable.'

'Cain never tried to force me to do anything.' Super boy said. 'I trust him.'

'Ah, what the hell.' Wally said, to my surprise. 'If you guys trust him, so will I.'

'And you, Robin?' Ah, a holdout.

'I don't know.' Robin proposed.

'He won't let me down.' Kaldur said, so firm in his delusion of me. It's actually quite heartwarming.

'Alright, fine.' Robin agreed, much to my surprise. 'If you trust him Kaldur, I'll trust him too.'

'Thank you, my friends.' I best leave now, before the greenskin catches on I was listening in. Right now, I suddenly feel utterly exhausted.


I was back at Winter Flats, and to my surprise, I saw Amberley cleaning the bunker. What a surprise. I'd never thought she would personally handle such a task, seeing as she usually plays some Highborn floozy*263. Still, she is plenty tidy, and quite lovely when she isn't wearing her bodyglove*264, or wearing a dress*265, or power armour*266. Then again, I cannot complain about her current attire: a white T-shirt, gray sweatpants, and pink apron. I won't lie, those clothes nicely define her shapely assets.

'Amberley?' I finally, and reluctantly, brought her attention. 'Mind if we talk?'

'Of course Ciaphas.' She cheered, quickly rushing over to me, then jumped. I caught her, and we shared a moment. 'I missed you.'

'I know.' I replied, bringing her closer to me. 'Oh, I know.'

'Let me guess, you want to talk to me about Felicia?' She whispered, which, granted, was one thing I did have to bring up. Unfortunately, it wasn't. 'Or my pending investigation?' How did she? 'Please Ciaphas, I'm not dim.'

'I'm not saying you are.' Really, I'm not. Honestly, Inquisitors can get so petty*267. 'I just thought you would have appreciated a little warning.' Her smile was genuine, and she leaned into me more.

'Thank you, Ciaphas.' Her voice was getting more hushed. 'Join me in my room. Please.' Well, I was never going to say no to such an offer now, can I? I followed Amberley into her bedroom, just as she threw away her apron and jumped (back first) onto the cushioned mattress. I undid my Commissarial jacket and joined her. I suppose this is what the Emperor intended for us. This blissful life, with a wife on one hand, and a glass of ama–

' We can talk freely now.' Damn it, you ruined the moment*268! 'And yes, I am aware of the Justice League's investigations of my activities.'

'Yes, well, what are we going to do?' I wondered, really not favouring my chances against the likes of that xenos-lover.

'You, will do nothing.' She said it, but I could hear the underlying order. 'Maintain relations with the League. At the very least, they are coming to see just how bad a threat the Genestealers are.'

'Doesn't that ruin your plans for a secret war?' I thought she mentioned something of the sort.

'It is inevitable now, so we must adapt.' Amberley shrugged, while also climbing on top of me and content to use me as a mattress. I won't lie when I say that I am getting some mixed messages here. 'With Felicia here, we can expand weapons research, given resources to act, of course.'

'Aren't you relatively wealthy?' I couldn't be sure, but some things in this room surely weren't issued by the League.

'A woman must have her own bank account too.' Oh, now she was purposefully teasing me now*269. 'Besides, the Team trusts you, and for what's to come, I fear that they may need you more than ever. As I would need Felicia.'

'What of your own private army? Don't they need you too?' I queried. 'Don't you need me?' And by association, Jurgen? Pathetic argument, I know, but I felt it needed to be said.

'My private army are good as a Planetary Defence Force outside of the League.' She admitted. 'But I am still in need of Stormtroopers. Even Penal troops would do.' As long as I am not responsible for training them, all the better! I have better things to do with my time. 'About your exploits at Gotham. I've been meaning to ask-' I cut her off, already knowing where she was going with this.

'The threat had been wiped out of New Jersey, or so I have been told.' I briefed in my usual nonchalance. 'I heard the local militia managed to take down a patriarch. They must have some excellent weapons.'

'Not entirely true, they did have help.' She was giggling. I guess her agents had helped out in some way*270. 'Still, there are no more Genestealers in New Jersey, and my army is working its way along the coast.'

'What of Winter Flats?' I wondered, more out of sentiment for the bunker.

'Also secured.' She stated. 'You can thank the due diligence of the Arbites here. As well as the local gun lunatics.'

'How on Holy Terra are you keeping this all under-wraps?' I said, realizing just how extensive her operations were. 'Surely, some idiot would try their luck.'

'Simple.' Oh, is it? Is it really? 'Sufficient bribes, media manipulation, and the quiet "dismissal" of journalists does wonders to keep our secret war the way it is.' Ah, I see how it is.

'Anyways, let us enjoy the night.' She said, tugging at her T-shirt. 'Together. You. Me. All alone.' Well, if an Inquisitor demands your fullest attention, who am I to refuse?

'We'll have a long day tomorrow, so dress appropriately for the jungle.'

SON OF A–

FOOTNOTES

241. Or Cainstead, as it was renamed after the First Siege of Perlia, in which Ciaphas found rather hilarious.

242. Refer to Ciaphas Cain: Duty Calls, but in summary, The Orks were using Prosperity Wells as a fuel depot.

243. Apparently? I honestly have no idea.

244. Might as well give up that line of thought Cain. I know, I went down that route too.

245. Oh hush you. You make us sound like a divorced couple.

246. Apparently, Felicia had disabled the teleportarium. Now, not for the usual Mechanicus theological reasoning of "since it is xenos technology, it must be destroyed." Oh no, far from that. Felicia disabled it because an idiot wanted to try again, and in all likelihood, maybe trying to summon an Ork onto Holy Terra's sacred grounds. It was a flip of a coin, of course, but would you want to gamble that?

247. Meaning, a small smile from a proud Dinah Lance and the usual frown from Batman.

248. Must you be so suggestive? It'll give others the wrong idea.

249. Ciaphas Cain. I need not tell you time and time again that your death would have severe consequences for the Imperial morale. I would know, the 597th was almost inconsolable if not for the efforts of Colonel Kasteen and Major Broklaw.

250. Oh, how sweet.

251. Serberys Sulphurhounds. In essence, a fire-breathing cyber beast that is in competition with the Krieg Mounts for utterly frightening to face.

252. The Adeptus Mechanicus would like to disagree with you and wishes to meet with you when it is most convenient.

253. Which will forever go down in Justice League History as the only time a civilian organization actually physically challenged the League. Most others used the media, legalities, or other such methods.

254. As long as she doesn't get caught, of course.

255. You obviously don't know the mechanicus.

256. Oh Ciaphas~ How very kind of you to say~

257. Nothing goes "under my nose" Ciaphas. I'm not reckless like you were.

258. I give up.

259. My thoughts exactly.

260. I'll show you indiscrete, Ciaphas Cain!

261. What's that supposed to mean?

262. THANK YOU!

263. As much as I resent such statements, he's not wrong.

264. In the wash.

265. For simple house cleaning?

266. In appropriate use of resources for the task.

267. We resent that!

268. Oh, did I?

269. What else is a woman to do with such meagre resources at her disposal?

270. To clarify, the Joker had weakened the Patriarch with a baffling combination of "Joker Acid", "Joker Gas", and somehow managed to outsmart it. Somehow. I really don't know how. Nonetheless, National Guard troops arrived at the scene of a weakened Patriarch and did the most rational thing a human being could do and unload all of their ammunition, including grenades and rockets, into it. Of course, they did lose a platoon, but overall, very successful.