(A/N Hi, hello, how are you?! Me? I'm just dandy! So, I've been flitting back and forth between not one, not two, but three AtlA fics while waiting for my writer's block to pass on my two PJO fics.

Whew! *wipes brow* Glad that's off my chest. I'm not sure if this idea has been done before, but I'm having fun with it! It started off as pirate!Zuko, but as most of my pieces do, it kinda grew a mind of its own.

That being said, this chapter is pretty much just back story, and then next will skip ahead to the timeframe of the show.

I hope you enjoy! As usual, I own nothing!)

The water was lapping on the side of the ship, causing the boat to bob in the waves. He'd felt the shifting weight and stance over the past two days, but out here he could see it and it was oddly peaceful. The roaring and shushing was much clearer up here on the deck too, as opposed to the near suction like noises he encountered below deck.

Find the Avatar, he mused.

Azula had told him, reciting the decree from Father verbatim, even as he read the words himself. 'Prince Zuko, You have proven yourself dishonorable and an unworthy heir to the throne. To prove your worth and regain your honor you must capture the Avatar and return them to the Fire Lord. Until such a time passes, you are hereby banished from the Fire Nation and may not cross its borders on land or sea.'

He was dishonorable and unworthy.

His thoughts turned to that of the 41st division and he wondered when their attack would commence.

Uncle Iroh finally found him in his secluded seat.

"You should be resting, Prince Zuko."

Zuko twitched at the title. He had no claim to it. That thought hurt, but not as much as it had yesterday.

He hadn't spoken since reading the decree. He knew Uncle was worried, but it was difficult to create a sense of order in his mind when everything he felt and everything he was taught were so incredibly at odds.

He missed Mother. She would know what was right.

But she and Ozai had never really seen eye to eye. Had never loved one another.

Zuko pondered over the fact he'd thought of the Fire Lord as 'Ozai' rather than 'Father.' It felt good to put distance between them. That surprised Zuko. He'd spent most of his life trying to earn Ozai's approval.

He smirked when he realized he'd done it again.

"Is there something I can get you, Prince Zuko?" his uncle asked again.

"Yes," his voice caught from disuse, so he cleared it before continuing. Uncle let his eagerness show on his face at hearing Zuko finally speak after so much silence. "I'd like to talk in private Uncle. I could… use your help sorting through some things. I don't… I'm not ready for you to assure me of anything, everything is too fluid for that right now, but I need to talk through it all to begin to make sense of it."

"Of course," he smiled warmly with a sigh of relief. "I would be delighted."

Uncle asked for them to take tea as they spoke and in a short time they were seated in Zuko's private quarters with steaming mugs in hand.

"What is it that you wish to speak on?"

Zuko considered all his topics that swirled in his mind and decided to address that which troubled him the most currently.

"The 41st division is going to be sacrificed, aren't they?"

Iroh grimaced and then nodded once slowly.

"It's my fault," Zuko sighed.

"No," Iroh's voice was firm, but the word hung in the air waiting to be expanded upon. "No. The plan was atrocious and you were right in speaking out against it. But it was not your place. You needed to wait and watch so someone else could do so in your stead."

Zuko withered. It was his fault they were going to die.

"That being said, after someone else pointed out the obvious moral dilemma, it would have been an argument over whether such sacrifices mattered and any opposing opinion would have needed a tactic to suggest in the general's stead."

Zuko's brow furrowed. Uncle could be right…or he could be trying to placate Zuko's conscience.

"Do you know anything about the planned ambush?"

"I can make guesses, but that is all they would be."

He nodded his understanding and considered what topic to tackle next.

"Uncle?" The general raised his brows waiting. "Can you explain to me how you define honor?"

He had been nervous to ask this question, and his nerves increased as Uncle stiffened almost imperceptibly.

"Honor is doing what is right, no matter the consequences." The loving smile Uncle directed at him made him duck his head.

Zuko had met plenty of consequence, but what was right. He had said speaking on behalf of the 41st was right, so why was that dishonorable?

Unless it wasn't.

Father had once said Azula was born lucky…and Zuko was lucky to be born.

Sometimes Zuko bitterly wished Azula had never learned to firebend.

Sighing, Zuko cleared his mind and focused again.

Sometimes it was hard to focus. That was new. He thought it might have something to do with his burn.

Or maybe it was the reeling sensation of being tossed to sea by his father.

"The Avatar hasn't been seen in over a hundred years."

"No…" Uncle answered carefully.

Suffering will be your teacher.

"I'm not meant to find him."

"Prince Zuko?"

He scowled in thought, not ready to meet Uncle's eye. All the answers were floating around him within his grasp, but they were jagged awful things that he was afraid of.

"The honorable generals had no qualms with the plan for the 41st."

Uncle stayed quiet and Zuko finally took a breath, allowing the pieces to fall into place no matter what pain they caused.

Zuko crept to the med bay to have his bandage removed and replaced with a clean one, his uncle shadowing him as he went.

When finished he gave his uncle the course he desired and asked him to relay it to the helmsman. Then he went back to his room to pack.

.

Zuko had not spoken again since telling him the needed to go to the port in Chameleon Bay. Iroh was quite worried, but pleased with the progress he'd made. It had hurt to see Zuko so silent and sullen, and it still hurt him to see it again, but at least now he knew Zuko's thoughts were locked in a loop of remembering the agony of fire on his face.

Of course, his thoughts circling around the reason for his banishment wasn't a whole lot better.

Iroh sighed, rubbing his beard as he looked out over the port they'd just docked in. It was a good spot to restock quickly. Quickly was the key part though. This port was Fire Nation controlled, but the surrounding areas were not. Even the general opinion at the port was not entirely positive or friendly towards their flag.

It was curious that Zuko would choose this port, so close to his enemies. It was even more curious that he knew this port by name without a map present. Zuko was knowledgeable, yes, but Iroh was concerned.

It was then that a youth in bandages came aboard the deck from below. He was dressed in black training clothes, devoid of the obvious Fire Nation colors, only cut and design offering hints of its origin. The boy carried a duffle, large enough to hold all manner of supplies, but small to be carried for long distances if the carrier was fit.

"Prince Zuko, are you well?" Iroh asked as he approached.

"Uncle Iroh," Zuko winced and wouldn't meet his eye as he bowed respectfully, making the flame with his fist and hand. "I- I want to-" He cleared his throat. "I need to inform the crew of my decision."

By this time most of the marines pacing about the deck fulfilling their duties had stopped in surprise at their prince. Iroh was in a near panic wondering exactly what decision he was referring to.

"Fire Lord Ozai intends for me to die at sea and disappear," he spoke clearly, loud enough for everyone on deck to hear. At these words everyone stopped, staring wide-eyed at the prince. "I'm not sure what his plans for you were, but I would only assume the worst. What would be the punishment for the prince dying under your watch." Zuko grimaced through the words and Iroh could see the pain in speaking of his father as such, but the boy continued on. "Whatever would have happened, I will not allow. If you feel you must arrest me for desertion, by all means, try. I will resist. If you feel you need to arrest me for acting against the Fire Lord, again, that is your choice. I will defend myself. But know that no matter what actions I take against the Fire Lord, my every choice will be with the benefit of the Fire Nation in mind. I will hold onto what honor I have and have no interest in the honor the Fire Lord basks in." He took a steadying breath and bowed again to the crew before walking to the ramp and heading down into the port.

Iroh hurried after him.

.

"Did- Did the prince just commit treason?" asked the helmsman, incredulous.

"That's…what it sounded like," the lieutenant said slowly.

"But he's the Crown Prince!" cried an ensign.

"The banished Crown Prince," pointed out a marine.

And so the conversations continued, round and round. Each group, each person, trying to understand the prince's motivations and actions. All except Li.

Li hadn't believed his cousin. She was a silly girl and he thought she'd exaggerated or flat out lied when she'd told her story about the prince he was about to serve under. As he prepared the outdated cruiser back in the capitol she'd danced around him jumping up and down and telling her tale in a scandalous false whisper. She worked in the palace, and when the usual tea server fell ill, Chu declared she was certain her coworker was pregnant with a general's child, it was up to Chu to serve the Fire Lord and his generals in the war meeting. She detailed everything that happened with the fair prince in the meeting. She didn't see the Agni Kai, but she heard the princess in the hall saying that her father should have killed her weak brother.

Li was horrified by her words and told her to hold her tongue and not speak such ill lies of the royal family. She looked so hurt by his words, and thinking back now, her bursting energy as she told her tale was a nervous movement. She bit her lip, flitted her eyes around, tugged at her sleeves. She was scared. Scared to continue working in the palace?

Clearing his throat, Li decided it did not matter if the prince had deserted. It did not matter if he'd committed treason. What mattered was the lives of the 41st division and the courage the prince had shown against his own father.

Clearing his throat again, Li tried to catch the attention of the confused marines. When he did, he relayed Chu's words, and prayed to Agni that she would be safe serving such a foul family.

.

Zuko couldn't face Uncle. It would hurt. If Uncle tried to dissuade him he wouldn't be able to keep his composure. If Uncle tried to return him to the ship, to the Fire Nation, he would fight back. And that wasn't a thought Zuko wanted to entertain. The notion of fighting his own father was absurd and disheartening, but fighting Uncle Iroh? The one who had introduced him to Master Piandao and built sandcastles with him and Lu Ten? The one who taught him to never give up, even when everything seemed so hopeless? The one who acted as a role model when his own father was the furthest from it? Aside from his mother, Uncle Iroh was the only adult Zuko had ever felt close to. Everyone else just wanted something from him.

Iroh continued to call out from just behind him, and Zuko continued to dodge his hand each time he reached for Zuko's shoulder.

It hurt so much and he barely registered the tears burning at his eye and dripping down his cheek. Even his burn was purged from his mind as he suffocated from the emotional turmoil of trying to leave his Uncle behind. Uncle finally stopped trying to get him to converse, but stayed on his heel as he paced across the town.

Zuko let the pain course through him and made it to the edge of the port town. Uncle was still right behind him as he cut a path to a stream a few paces into the trees. Mid-stride Zuko pulled out his knife, the very one that Uncle had gifted him so long ago, and made it to the stream.

"Prince Zuko-" Uncle tried again before Zuko whirled around and cut him off.

"Don't call me that!" He no longer held that title. Pulling at his ponytail with one hand he swiftly cut the hair from his head. He could feel that he didn't do it well, leaving a small island of short hair on his otherwise bald head, but he didn't care. He held Uncle's gaze through the blurriness of tears and threw the topknot into the running water.

Uncle deflated a little, taking a breath and holding Zuko's gaze with sad eyes.

"I have not told you this before," Uncle said with a heavy voice, "but ever since I have lost my son-" Zuko flinched and interrupted him.

"Don't say it."

"I think of you as my own," Uncle continued after a moment, affording his words all the weight behind them. "I was lost when Lu Ten died. I was angry and grieving and everything else in the world faded away. I did not know what else our family, and you in particular, were suffering until much later. I am so sorry I was not there for you, dear Nephew."

Zuko's posture caved in on himself, refusing to give into his desire to attack his uncle with a hug. To hug him and be held and forget all the woes of the world like a child would.

After a moment Iroh took out his own knife, knelt by the water, and reverently placed the blade to his own topknot. The tied hair joined Zuko's in the water. He could only stare openly at his uncle. Why would he do that? The great General Iroh was not banished from the nation! He could go home, leave Zuko to wander and continue his life as a prince. Why would he give that all up?

"I trust you have a plan, Nephew?"

Zuko blinked at him, still coming to terms with this turn of events. He'd planned to go at it alone. Finally, he nodded woodenly, and mumbled his destination.

Uncle smiled.

"An honorable goal." Zuko flinched again, but Uncle only smiled wider. "I see that you are prepared, but perhaps it would be beneficial for us to return to the ship to take note of our supplies together."

Zuko bit his lip and considered the likelihood of his crew trying to arrest him. The idea made him cringe, but with Uncle by his side he felt a new sense of calm. The world would always be against him, but that was okay, because with Uncle they could handle it.

.

No one aboard moved as Li told his story. They were all present on deck. No one bothered checking the supplies. No one stoked the engine. No one manned the line to the dock. They all listened in silence and horror. Not a single person felt the need to question him. They had seen the prince's burn. Jun had heard him wake up from nightmares already on their short voyage and he was not calling out for his father to save him.

This was the Fire Lord they served.

Was there a way to save a nation from its very leader?

Was there a way to save their prince from his very father?

Ru was shaking, tears barewithheld. When questioned he explained his sister had just finished her enlistment training. She'd been stationed with the 41st division.

A tense silence hung in the air as they all digested exactly what was going to happen to her. Several times people tried to break it, but minutes passed-three, five, ten-and none had a voice to use or words to say.

Footsteps sounded on the ramp and they looked up to see General Iroh forlornly coming boarding the ship with a nervous looking prince a step behind him.

"I do hope none of you have changed your minds from when my nephew explained he was leaving the ship," the general spoke amiably to the gathered marines. "He has allowed me to join him and I am hoping to check our supplies before leaving you to your own duties." He inclined his head and turned to the steps below deck but Ru shot up from where he'd been slumped on the deck floor.

"Wait!"

The general and prince paused midstep, wary and obviously expecting a fight.

"You said we could fight you or we could not," Ru into a kowtow before Prince Zuko, "I ask that I serve you instead. Please. I don't know how to save my sister, but I know you're the only one who will."

The prince inhaled sharply through his nose and shot General Iroh an astonished look. The kindly man gave a small smile and slight nod to the prince and he stepped forward.

Kneeling, Prince Zuko placed a hand on Ru's shoulder.

"I am going north of Ba Sing Se to the battalion that will me the 41st division. What I'm doing is treason, and I don't even know if I'll succeed in my intentions. I can't take you with me."

A sob tore through Ru. And Yuro approached them.

"If we cannot go with you, we will hold the ship ready for your return."

Murmurs of assent rippled through the marines as the prince scowled in confusion.

"I- I won't be able to come back though. If I did you'd all be…" He trailed off as one by one each member of the crew joined Yuro. "Why are you doing this?"

"Why are you trying to save the 41st?"

"Well, it's the right-" he cut off his indignant reply and scowled at Yuro again. The general chuckled behind him. "We'll be outlaws. The Earth Kingdom will want nothing to do with us and the Fire Nation will want us executed."

Various murmurs of what would have happened had the prince died on their watch or how they were also sent on the fruitless chase for the Avatar filled the ranks.

"You'd be taking orders from me," he declared, his voice indicating he knew just how unappealing that sounded.

The crew laughed.

"We can't keep this ship. We'll have to buy, trade, or steal one that's a little more nondescript." This time when he scowled he looked less annoyed and confused and more like he was trying to think through a problem.

"And I am sure some of you have family members you would rather not suffer from your insubordination," General Iroh said gently.

More hesitant murmurs went through the crew until Mon Lee spoke up.

"If we handle the ship and manage to get our families while you're not on board, your highness, then after your time in *list the place again* you can rejoin us and we'll make sail under your command."

He scowled in thought again, visibly weighing pros and cons. He looked around, studying the sailors. They were no longer marines, each of them had abandoned the Fire Navy in the course of a single day. It was difficult to remain loyal to those who would throw your life away for nothing. Finally, he gave a single sharp nod.

"Do your best to buy or trade for a ship to accommodate this crew. Then, see if you can figure out where we would need to commission directly from. If we need to take family aboard we can't rely on a single ship for long."

Shouts and cheers came up from the crew at the orders. This was going to work. They were going to defect. The prince and the general were going to lead them well. They were going to protect their families. And, best of all, it shouldn't take much to convince the prince to give the Fire Nation hell.

.

Zuko blushed under Uncle's gaze as he unpacked his bag: Two changes of clothes (both lacking the Fire insignia), a week's worth of food for a single person eating lightly, a canteen, his dao swords, and his mother's mask.

Uncle studied the full table and empty bag in silence, making Zuko squirm a little.

"There is no coin," he finally said, brow scrunched and stroking his beard. Zuko shrugged.

"I didn't want to steal," he practically whispered.

"Mmm," Iroh nodded gravely, still in thought. "I will have no such qualms using the money from my brother. I do not feel he is entitled to it, and we will use it to help others as we go."

Zuko squirmed again, but gave a sharp nod, accepting Uncle's wisdom.

"I trust you have a plan for when you arrive?"

Again, Zuko offered a sharp nod, not really looking forward to sharing his mediocre plan.

Uncle waited.

Zuko sighed.

"I was going to remove my bandages," he mumbled with a shrug, "to make them more…sympathetic." The word was sour in his mouth. "Get captured and inform them of the bait and flank plan. In exchange for the information I was going to bargain that the Earth Kingdom take prisoners rather than trying to kill the soldiers." He couldn't meet Uncle's eye and didn't really know how he was reacting to the plan.

"That would be quite the bargain, Prin- Achem. Zuko."

Zuko could feel the corner of his mouth turn up at Uncle catching himself. It felt good that he was being taken seriously. He didn't want anything to do with his royal title…it only tied him to Ozai.

"My goal is the lives of the people. We can't avoid battle, but I just want to minimize the casualties."

"A goal that I can support and do my best to help ensure."

Zuko smiled and finally looked up at him. They could do this. It would be okay.