Crumpled Horn Plot Bunnies
By Andrew J. Talon
Disclaimer: I do not and probably never will own Harry Potter or any other copyrighted works mentioned in this story. I am not writing this for profit.
Another fun trope that should be used more...
It was late, and Harry was sitting up in his bed at the Burrow. Ron was snoring away nearby, but that didn't disturb Harry at all. Well, it did, but not because it made it hard to sleep.
No, Harry was kept up thinking of some way to repay the Weasleys. They had, after all, rescued him from the Dursleys. Molly Weasley had cooked him as much as he wanted, and insisted he eat it all. Arthur Weasley had treated him like a son, taking him around the farm and showing him his Muggle tools and devices (which Harry had explained, making him happy). Ron, the Twins and even Percy had all done their best to make him feel at home. Ginny was shy, but always very nice.
If this is what a normal family was supposed to be like, then Harry couldn't help but wish it was his. With all his heart.
He had to do something for them. Something kind. But what skills did he have?
Harry hummed. His only real skills outside of magical things were...
He smiled happily. Of course! But he'd have to be quiet about it...
Molly Weasley was almost always the first to rise. She was in charge of the household, after all, and had to get breakfast started for her children. She was already mentally checking off a list of things to cook, the total menu. She intended to give Harry extra portions-The poor boy looked like he was starving!
It was right after getting dressed and brushing her teeth, her husband still asleep, that she smelled it. Food being cooked, and in large portions. She frowned deeply, and, her wand at the ready, she crept out of the master bedroom and down the hall. She went down the stairs, peering into the kitchen. Her eyebrows shot up.
"Harry?!"
Harry turned from the stove with a big, happy smile.
"Morning, Mrs. Weasley," Harry greeted her quietly, absent mindedly turning over the tomatoes frying in the pan, "I hope I didn't wake you."
"Oh no dearie, you didn't, but what's all this?" Molly asked, examining the plates of food all about the counters. Fried bread, sausages, eggs, baked beans, black pudding-Harry had put together a traditional English Breakfast for everyone, it seemed.
"Oh, I'm really sorry Mrs. Weasley," Harry admitted, coloring a bit, "I-I hope you don't think I'm rude, it's just... You were so kind to me and-and I wanted to repay you all so much." He looked down at her frying pan. "Nobody's ever let me have seconds before, or thirds," he mumbled.
Molly walked over to Harry, and gave him a hug. He looked up in shock, and stiffened. Molly mentally grimaced. She had thought Ron and the Twins were exaggerating about Harry's relatives, but a million little things about him made it seem like it was far worse. She'd investigate that later though.
"There's no need, Harry," Molly said sincerely, "but thank you so much for doing this. You really didn't have to."
"Oh, but, well..." Harry smiled shyly, "I-I actually... Like cooking. I mean, my relatives made me do it, but I actually enjoyed it. It was the only thing I could do that was... That was really fun. I thought you'd all like a Traditional English, but there were some extras so I made a few frittatas too."
"What?" Molly asked. Harry turned away, and Molly secretly tried some of the bacon. Her eyes widened-It was nice and crispy, well cooked! He'd even notched the fat to keep it from curling, so the fat was crispy too!
Harry pulled out what looked like an omelet from the oven, and held it up to Molly. She seized a fork, and with an expert chef's eye, examined it.
"It's basically an egg bake, with vegetables," Harry said, "I saw you had some leftover veggies from last night and I thought it might be good if you wanted something lighter. Or for later."
Molly took a sample, and chewed thoughtfully. She smiled at Harry warmly.
"It's different, but I do like it," she said honestly. "Though it is a little watery."
"Oh, I always screw that up," Harry sighed. Molly beamed, and squeezed his shoulder.
"If you'd like, how about I give you some cooking lessons?" She asked. "And we can try out some of your recipes too? That's the great thing about cooking, after all-There's so many things to try and learn and experiment with! And of course, always ways to improve!"
Harry's eyes lit up.
"R-Really?" He smiled happily up at Molly. "Thank you so much!"
Molly chuckled, and helped Harry set out the rest of breakfast. Sure, she was traditional about a number of things, but Harry clearly loved cooking and (as she tried a few more samples) he was actually quite good at it. The rest of her family hardly disagreed, digging in with the same enthusiasm they always did. Molly chuckled quietly as she watched Ginny. Her daughter was blushing and stammering when Harry gave her some more black pudding, and proceeded to butter her tomatoes and salt her bread.
Well, at the very least, Molly mused, if Ginny and Harry got together, she certainly wouldn't go hungry...
Sadly most of the HP fics that involve Harry being a good cook are just excuses for Draco or (shudder) Snape to bang him, but it just being a fun hobby for Harry would be a great story too.
And it could change a lot of things. For one, closer friendships with the House Elves at Hogwarts.
For another, perhaps some unexpected friendships...
Draco: "So... It's true then! Harry Potter has come to Hogwarts!"
Harry: "Oh, yeah. Hey... From Madam Malkins?"
Draco: "That's right! I'm Draco Malfoy! So Potter, would you-"
Harry: "Oh, hang on!" He rummages in his pockets and hands him something wrapped "Here. It's nice to meet you. I'd like to be your friend, so would you like to have some chocolate?"
Draco: "I... Well..." The Malfoy Scion shrugs. He's not going to turn down free sweets, especially if he can get in good with Potter "Sure." He opens it, makes a face at how plain it looks, but takes a bite just to be polite "..." He quickly wolfs the rest of it down "Wow... Where did you buy this?!"
Harry: "Oh, I made it!"
Draco: "You... Made it?!"
Ron: "Yeah! And I got plenty of pieces, Malfoy!"
Draco has a choice here. He could antagonize a Weasley, orrr... He could pretend to tolerate him and get more chocolate from this kid who happens to be Harry Potter.
Draco: "Well... If you're giving your friends chocolate, I'll have to be your best friend, huh Potter?"
Harry was already overwhelmed at the prospect of having one actual friend in Ron. So having another one so quickly... Made his face light up in joy.
Harry: "Sure! Call me Harry!"
Ron: "Ya know Harry, Malfoy's kind of a-"
Harry: "Hey, come on guys. Let's not fight. It's our first day."
Draco: "Yes Weasley. Let's not fight on our first day." smug smirk
Ron: scowl
Draco: Oh yes. This could be fun...
And naturally, when he gets older...
At a DA meeting, Harry has cooked snacks for everyone. All the girls take some chocolate, and bite down. There is silence.
Hermione: "... Harry? You... You made this chocolate?"
Harry: "Yup! I worked really hard on it, Dobby actually helped me-"
Daphne Greengrass grabs Harry and points her wand at everyone else, a crazed look in her eyes.
Daphne: "HE'S MINE! I SAW HIM FIRST!"
Hermione had her wand out in an instant, looking similarly crazed as she licked her lips.
Hermione: "LIKE HELL YOU DID! I DID!"
Susan: "GET YOUR MITTS OFF HIM, SNAKE!"
Ginny: "BACK OFF, PUFF! HE'S MINE!"
Luna just tackles Harry.
Luna: "BANZAI!"
The girls descend into a massive brawl over Harry. Neville watches in disbelief.
Neville: "Blimey..."
Ron: "And that is why I stopped being jealous of him."
What can I say? I like the idea of Harry really enjoying cooking and I think it could be wholesome and fun. Or not wholesome, but still very fun. ;p
Here's an omake by Kandagger:
Anyone Can Cook
Snape: Potter! What are you doing in the dungeons!
Potter: Making stock sir...I had some bones left over from last night's roast and well...
Snape: *wips out tasting spoon and takes a sample*
Potter: Sir...it's not ready
Snape: *tastes it*
[Flash cut to young Severus sick in bed. Lily climbing though his window with a canteen of soup.
Lily: it's not very good...broth is a bit watery.
Snape: (only half lying) It's perfect Lil...]
Snape: *drops spoon in slow motion*
Potter: Sir...?
Snape: (remembers himself) ...only hour or so on the simmer, yes?
Potter: (astonished) yes sir.
Snape: There are charms for that...are you a wizard or aren't you?
Potter: (bristles) I am a chef sir...and some things just take time.
Snape: Good Answer.
